


Green Dreams

by I_Mushi



Series: Green Dreams [1]
Category: Compilation of Final Fantasy VII, Final Fantasy VII, Final Fantasy VII: Advent Children
Genre: Gen, M/M, SOLDIER - Freeform, Shinra, Time Travel, Zack/Cloud friendship, hiding skills, mild Reno/Tseng, pre-Turks Reno, young Reno
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-11-26
Updated: 2015-09-03
Packaged: 2017-11-21 15:50:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 40
Words: 269,086
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/599501
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/I_Mushi/pseuds/I_Mushi
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Cloud has suffered and asked for forgiveness, but Aeris knows she alone cannot give him it. He must find that forgiveness and peace where it began, back at SOLDIER.</p>
<p>Update 9/13/17: Happy 10th Anniversary Green Dreams! Please find me on Tumblr where you'll find a preview of the official GREEN DREAMS REWRITE! The same story but cleaner and more concise and, universe-willing, finished! This behemoth of a story has always been high on my to-do list, but every time I sat down to work on it I got trapped under the bloat of my own ambitious plot strings. Rewriting it ten years later gives me the perspective to neaten up the loose threads, pick at the ones the plot demands, and re-thread this story to give it new life. Don't worry! It'll be the same Green Dreams (and I might leave the old one up if people insist) but in HD, just in time for the FFVII Remaster!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Walls are Closing In

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Birddi](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Birddi/gifts).



> Many of you may recognize this story from fanfiction.net. It's the same story, but at the request of several readers I'm uploading it here too. Also I want to make a shout out to Birddi, the best beta a writer could ask for. She helped me make Green Dreams bigger and better than I could ever imagine. This story is dedicated to her and the friendship we now have after working on it for almost five years! (This also makes my abysmally slow updating all the more embarrassing.)
> 
> Disclaimer: I own nothing and make no money from this work. Anything recognizable to the Final Fantasy VII series and its associated parts belongs to Square Enix and affiliated companies.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cloud has suffered and asked for forgiveness, but Aeris knows she alone cannot give him it. He must find that forgiveness and peace where it began, back at SOLDIER. SephirothxCloud

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I own nothing and make no money from this work. Anything recognizable to the Final Fantasy VII series and its associated parts belongs to Square Enix and affiliated companies.

In what was left of the old cafeteria of Shinra Headquarters, where the recruits and SOLDIERs had eaten so many years ago, great lumbering beasts walked now. Fiends that fed off the old mako in the labs had overrun the entirety of Shinra Company's compound and the surrounding area. No one bothered to clean it out anymore. There were few people strong enough to do it, and none of them wanted to go anywhere near it. After all the trouble Shinra had caused, the damage in Midgar and beyond, the area was finally feeling some measure of peace. Even the people of Edge rarely ventured near Shinra Headquarter's remains; leaving those demons alone.

The Shinra complex after Meteor was a pile of rubble for the most part anyway. The plate had completely collapsed and Shinra Headquarters had gone down with it, falling on its lower levels, crushing the labs except the deepest ones underground, and leaving debris for miles around. The entire underbelly of the tower was a ruin, and most of the labs were completely inaccessible—which luckily meant if no one could get in, it wasn't likely anything could get out. Later the top floor had been completely destroyed by Jenova's second reunion, furthering the total devastation of what had once been an empire. Now it was only habitable for the monsters that roamed the remains of Midgar.

Cloud Strife was among those few who could have cleaned it out, but Shinra was about the last place on the planet he ever wanted to see again. Still, he hadn't moved too far from it. Cloud had made himself a home a little ways outside the wreckage of Midgar. After saving the world and taking down the mighty Shinra Corporation with a small band of warriors, his name had spread to the reaches of the Northern Crater, Mideel, and beyond. Unable to escape this unwanted fame but not wanting to go too far from his closest friends, he had sought the solitude of the mountains outside Midgar and frequently made appearances in Edge to the delight of its people. Tifa's influence from Seventh Heaven, among threats and exaggerations, had kept the worst of his admirers away. Occasionally someone drifted close by, but the fiends that loitered between his home and Edge kept all but the most ardent people away.

He visited Edge almost twice a week. Tifa always had a spare bedroom for him if he didn't want to return home, and Denzel and Marlene were always thrilled to see him. Barret seemed to find it funny how 'soft' Cloud had gotten, but Tifa, suited to her motherly role over Denzel and Marlene, always admonished the larger man anytime he even mentioned it. Their home had a cozy, welcoming atmosphere, but Cloud never spent much time there. He had at first found their constant presence like a weight upon him, as though he was still their leader and they still looked to him for direction. Even as that feeling passed, Cloud felt stifled and withdrawn if he stayed longer than dinner. Over time Tifa and Barret had grown accustomed to him leaving suddenly and popping up again in a couple of days.

Cloud's delivery service still ran, mostly because he was at loose ends but no conventional work appealed to him. After Kadaj's gang shook up the tentative peace, he'd taken a break before starting up again. The miniature vacation had been more about reconnecting with himself and better clearing through the clutter of his mind. Many memories of Shinra were full of holes, and sorting through them seemed to only make it worse.

Though Cloud enjoyed the travel, and therefore fighting, of his delivery service, he didn't make enough to really support himself. Rufus Shinra, of all people, had surprisingly lent some of his aid—which Cloud had only taken after a lot of pushing. As long as Cloud cleared the road from Edge to Kalm of monsters once every two weeks and ran some special deliveries for the President, then he was afforded free provisions from Neo-Shinra.

Neo-Shinra worked closely with Reeve Tuesti's World Regenesis Organization (WRO) now. Slowly the company was clearing the blood off of the Shinra name. It still made basic commodities, like potions, antidotes, and simple armor, though it was not the all-encompassing empire its predecessor once was. Neo-Shinra was also no longer involved in providing electricity to the people, which had been the real powerbase of the old business. The company was growing in the eyes of the populace, especially after digging up and giving much information to the WRO about previous Shinra activities in an effort to improve their image. Cloud's association with them, even if it had little to do with actual business, only boosted this.

Cloud's delivery service gave him the chance to travel far and wide across the continent. He often dropped in on friends when nearby them and made a point of taking a short break when near Nibelheim to visit his mother's grave. The City of the Ancients was also frequented on days of note to Cloud, especially the anniversary of Aeris' death, the destruction of Nibelheim, and Sephiroth's demise. Cloud didn't cry, but those days seemed to fall when it rained, and the flowers he planted by the graves were always in bloom.

There was one more ritual Cloud always adhered to: on his way home, he would stop at the cliff overlooking Midgar. He would often stand in silence thinking of his best friend, of their history he could scarcely remember, and wondering about what could have been. Even though the buster sword had been moved to its new home in Aeris' church, the cliff was still Cloud's spot alone for Zack.

Despite the blond's generally brooding nature, he had managed to loosen up in the years of rest. He and Vincent saw each other rarely, since Vincent was even more of a lone wolf and prone to disappearing for months at a time. Still, the ex-Turk always showed up eventually, and was an excellent sparring partner because he remained one of the few capable of keeping up with Cloud's mako-enhanced speed. Barret had returned to Marlene in Midgar once he finally removed the gun from his metal arm and replaced it with a steel hand when the three remnants had been defeated. He raised her with Tifa at Seventh Heaven and treated Denzel like a son. Cloud had long acknowledged he was a poor father-substitute, and was rather thankful to not be relegated the job.

Cid still lived in Rocket Town and had finally married Shera. He continued to tinker with airships, rockets, and anything mechanical he could get his hands on—with the exception of Fenrir, which Cloud had been careful to maintain himself. The couple always had warm cider whenever Cloud was over, and he enjoyed it even if he would never admit it. Tifa had tipped them off that a young Cloud had been quite fond of it, much to his chagrin.

Yuffie had changed the most of all the members of AVALANCHE. Where she had been the annoying and exasperatingly high-spirited ninja, she had grown more mature with age. She still complained in a whiny voice and stole his materia occasionally, but becoming the leader of Wutai had mellowed her some. Cloud still found her difficult to handle for long periods of time, but no one could say she wasn't a great leader of her people.

Despite everyone he knew around the world and his fame, Cloud's social life was still stunted at best. He rarely spent more than a day or two with friends and went out of his way to avoid most cities and certainly crowds, finding solitude more to his liking. He could often be caught stargazing and roaming at all times of the day and night. His habits of wading into the ocean or disappearing into the hills and crags for days to come back bloody and ragged had gotten him a number of lectures from a worried Tifa.

Cloud knew that many of his friends were disappointed that getting a second whack at his arch-nemesis hadn't greatly changed him in the long run. Tifa and the others had believed he'd come to terms with his past history, but Cloud still struggled with it. It didn't weigh him down like it used to, but he couldn't escape it either. The remnants and that final fight had only added to the endless questions and what-ifs, not brought him true peace.

How long until he wasn't a memory again?

* * *

Another briskly cool night had fallen upon the mountains outside Midgar. Gusts of snow-laced wind had hit Midgar as the months of winter wound on. Cloud laid on his bed in his small, three-room house, the refrigerator full of Tifa's home-cooked food, and three photos sitting on the small table of the living room. A General, a SOLDIER, a cadet, and Tifa were in one. The other two on the right had all of AVALANCHE in it, one from after Meteor, one from after the three remnants returned.

The small refrigerator and the entire kitchen were bare except for the sink. It had three dishes and several mismatched cups that had yet to be cleaned. The living room was relatively spotless except for a number of bandages strewn about, some even dotted with blood. Cloud was often too tired to throw them out until the following morning, and left them like bits of an unraveled mummy strewn across his floor.

The sheer numbers of plants, however, overran the simplicity of the room. Every windowsill and table had at least some fern or flower on it. Cloud had taken up a small collection of various plant-life and let it flourish quietly in his home. Aeris' church no longer had her flower garden, but now a pool rimmed with her yellow and white blossoms. Cloud often ventured into Midgar just to visit her little spot, though usually early in the morning or as the day died, because much of the public visited it too. He resolutely refused to be upset by the loss of such a personal place. Instead he took from the remains of her garden seeds and had grown some of his own so that he could have a little bit of herself with him, just as he had a little bit of Zack inside him.

Beyond the kitchen and living room were two other rooms: a small bathroom connected to a marginally bigger bedroom. The entire place, all built by Cloud, was small, but Cloud had no need of anything bigger and didn't want for anything more.

The blond owner and builder of this house was curled up on top of his coverlet, the material having been kicked off at some point in the night, and restlessly moved in his sleep. Behind his lids his eyes roved about blindly in a green-haze. Like thick, sluggish water it wrapped around his form, suspending him in a void without any sense of time or place. Disoriented and afraid, he twisted and turned fruitlessly, struggling against the sheets. There was a constant painful pulse like a heartbeat that sent throbs of pure agony through his body. The more violently he moved the more the pain increased. Faintly glowing green eyes opened dazedly, not fully aware of himself.

Sitting up helped as Cloud got a feel for his surroundings. He sighed quietly as he slid off the bed and into the combined kitchen and living room. Resigned to another sleepless night, he took the last clean glass from the cupboard and filled it with water. Barely awake Cloud blinked his eyes several times; his senses slow to interpret the situation.

Everything bent and tilted around him for a moment, and a heavy sense of dread settled in his stomach. Like suddenly standing up and the blood rushing to his head, he closed his eyes to reign in the dizziness and the sudden urge to vomit. When he reopened them everything had straightened out and his stomach wasn't dry heaving, but the details seemed sharper and stood out more in his mind. The water from the sink and in the glass turned his hands a greenish, nauseating glow from the light.

Cloud pulled his hand sharply out from under the sink as the water began to overflow the cup and run over his fingers. The sudden burning sensation where his hand touched the liquid jerked his mind to a more functional state, and he reflexively dropped the glass.

It shattered. The uneven tiling of his floor was rained upon with droplets of green that left ugly splotches where they landed. Like mercury, the beads banded together and formed puddles of acidic chemical that would leave permanent dark green stains. Each individual piece of glass on the floor reflected a thousand times over the sickening green glow.

Startled as the fumes reached him, he gagged and choked on the searing smell and fumbled backwards to get away. He knew the burn and the scent that now overwhelmed his kitchen—knew it all too well. As he looked at his hand, it had taken on an unhealthy redness where the chemical touched him, and the area became irritated and sensitive to touch. The course flannel of his pants was harsh against it as he wiped his flaming hand against his thigh, only agitating the burn. Cloud recognized the feeling.

The bottoms of his bare feet stepped on the broken glass and cut into him, and his elbow connected solidly with the wall, but he was barely aware of the pain. He managed to throw open the two windows of the room, but the odor, like bile, would not leave his nose.

Blindly he turned from the smell and went back to his room, tracking blood on the floor. He slammed the door behind him a bit too hard, his muscles still agitated and twitching with repressed strength, and the door groaned and cracked at the force. Seeing the bed Cloud's whole body slumped as he sat down, holding his head in his hands, reigning in his breathing and trying to slow his frantic heart rate. He could have laughed if his throat wasn't closed so tight and he wasn't still short of breath. Already the smell was dissipating into the air, and Cloud breathed in and out slowly.

Imagining mako everywhere had been the least of the tricks his mind had played on him. Coming to the City of Ancients and seeing Aeris again, looking at his reflection in the church and seeing Sephiroth's eyes once more, all of these things had happened and nothing had come of them. Cloud's mind had led him long ago to believe he had been a First Class SOLDIER, that he had gone on missions, done amazing things, all untrue. It had betrayed him to Jenova's will and had turned him into a puppet when he handed over the black materia to Sephiroth. Even now the weakness of his shattered mind still haunted him with false vision after false vision.

Standing up again and feeling more tired than he had in weeks; the blond slipped off his flannel sleeping-pants and fell back upon the bed. Nude, the sheets rubbed against him like cool soothing fingers. The blond rolled on to his stomach to cool his hot body down. His hand pained him to even touch the soft pillows, and he let it dangle off the side instead. Cloud left the coverlet at the foot of the bed and sprawled out to attempt sleep. His tired mind ceaselessly moved though, and he did not sleep well.

* * *

The morning sun broke into the little room where its occupant stirred. Cloud slept so lightly that the barest morning rays were enough to shake him awake. Constant paranoia from army life and living in the open with Sephiroth and Hojo on the loose didn't allow Cloud a solid black slab of sleep anymore. Still groggy, he crossed to his dresser and pulled on the usual attire of the day: a sleeveless sweater along with loose military pants, and steel-toed combat boots.

The bathroom was small, with a couple of plants left by Marlene proliferating on the windowsill, and one lone toothbrush sat on the sink nearby. Cloud leaned over to grab it and began to meticulously brush his teeth.

The memories of the night before swam back into the forefront of his mind. Cloud pushed those away ruthlessly and, like a good soldier, separated himself from the pain and instead focused on the bland activity of brushing and spitting. He spat the last of it out and filled up a cup with water. The blond swirled it and gurgled once before spitting it out again, but stopped from repeating the action. The water had tinted the plastic cup green on the inside and warmed his marked hand. The burn from the night before became quite evident under the morning light.

In one violent motion Cloud dumped it all out into the drain, almost throwing the cup into the sink too. His eyes grew unnaturally wide as the chemical dribbled pooled at the bottom of the sink. His hands shook as he tried to refill the cup with water just to show himself it wasn't what it seemed. It proved to be impossible as more and more glowing-green filled his cup instead. Cloud backed away from the sink towards the door, drawing in a sharp breath, his face white and strained. He easily sidestepped the trashcan but his back hit the closed door.

Everything stopped around him as he tried to escape the images and desperately looked into the mirror. The familiar flop of blond hair and pale skin were strangely overshadowed by the luminescent orbs staring into a face as fearful as the one on the first day of SOLDIER recruitment.

Cloud was out the door and on his motorcycle as fast as his enhanced muscles could carry him. In his flight he stopped long enough in the living room to collect a handful of materia, which he stuffed into the pockets of his pants. Sudden escapes from inns and breaking camp fast in AVALANCHE had honed the technique of thinking on his feet where the military had not. First Tsurugi was strapped to his back in a flash. Cloud slid on the goggles and gunned Fenrir's engine. The accompanying roar of the motor matched the roar of panic in Cloud's ears as he took off into the desert.

He swerved madly around monsters and the arched noses and chins of cliffs, making hairpin curves and skidding sharply in his blind attempt to escape. He was panicking he knew, but he couldn't shake the hysteria clawing in his stomach. The desert sand and bright sun blinded him as the wind whipped around in a tumult, dragging on his clothes. At the back of his mind he knew that at the speed he was moving, he could be a mangled mess of metal and blood if he crashed. All the same he upped the speed, pushing his subconscious back where it belonged, kicking up debris behind him.

The ocean glimmered on the edge of the horizon, and Cloud didn't stop until Fenrir's front tire was washed clean by the tide. Breathing hard with exertion and finally feeling the harried panic dissipate some, Cloud dismounted and slipped off his boots and socks. He rolled up his pants to his knees and waded into the water.

If he looked far enough up the coast he could see the grey outline of Midgar. Where the once perpetual smoke-cloud had smothered it, there was an odd sense of wonder at being able to see it fully. Cloud imagined he could see the spire of Aeris' church from this distance. He had never slept in that church, though he'd lain there for hours, staring up through the hole in the roof at the sky. The nightmares that plagued him would have tainted the beauty of her home.

Cloud turned back to the ocean, feeling terribly worn, like he had finally stretched himself too far and he could no longer muster the will to fight it. Something in him felt far older than he was, and it tugged at his weary soul. As he stared out into the ocean he could remember a younger Cloud looking out at this same sight too. He could recall the uncomfortable bouncing in the back of a yellow pick-up truck, and the dreamlike quality of Zack's words. The ocean, he remembered, was where Zack washed his hands of the mako and cleaned Cloud's for him because he had been too weak to do it himself.

Cloud leaned down into the water and let it swirl about his burnt hand, wiping away the memory. There was something soothing in the caress of the ocean that calmed those black thoughts, like that moment when he'd felt Aeris reaching out to hold his hand. He waded further into the water ignoring the waves of the ocean pulling at his clothes, letting the peace and gentle rhythm of the water guide him to the shores of restful sleep, a place he hadn't been to in a long time.

He began to sway, the sides of his feet lifting off the rough sand and then back down with the surf, basking in the primal rhythm. He leaned his head back and felt the warmth of the sun on his face. His eyes gently shut, and then quietly, almost unknown to him, he began to fall.

He landed in a garden, the soft cushion of grass wonderfully familiar. Cloud looked up at the endless blue sky and wondered if his eyes had ever been that color—if they had ever been just normal. He could no longer remember what they had looked like. As a cadet he had never had mako treatments. Waking up long after Hojo had turned him into a lab rat, his eyes had changed forever, and his broken memory had forgotten who he had been before.

* * *

Aeris stood off to the side and slightly behind Cloud, letting him soak in the peace of her garden. He would not feel that calm for very long, and had already gone so long without, that she asked from deep inside her that he might feel that again. Slowly his eyes closed, and the delicate lashes caused tiny shadows to appear upon his fine features, too sharp from stress and burdens. Kneeling by his side she reached out a hand to his. Rubbing his knuckles and kneading his palm, she sang a soft, low song that her own mother had calmed her with long ago.

She could only hope Cloud could forgive her and himself.

* * *

Shinra was not so old-fashioned as to have a trumpet player wake its soldiers in the mornings. Instead they had an alarm someone had said long ago was like the screech of a castrated Behemoth.

Cloud had suffered enough of these wake-up calls to last a lifetime and thought he would never have to wake to it again. After all the commotion of his early life, waking up at the crack of dawn to silence was a blessing. When the sudden blare of the alarms shattered the silence of the room with a sudden cacophony of sound, Cloud was up like a shot, one hand under the pillow for the knife he kept there. With a particularly loud WHAM, Cloud's head connected with the bottom of the bunk above him.

He rubbed his forehead partially from pain but mostly from shock. His mind seemed to detach itself involuntarily as he took in the room.

It was a far too recognizable, with four sets of bunk beds spread about: two against one wall perpendicular to him, his own and the bunk above it to the left of the door, and the other set directly across from his. The walls were the dull gray steel and the floor a dirt-thin carpet in very faded red. The only windows were two small ones close to the ceiling that couldn't be opened. In all the bunks around him, people were beginning to stir. Cadets with long-forgotten faces and voices that recalled some of his most faded memories peeked out of covers and rolled over on pillows. Like ghosts, they stumbled out of bed and started their daily routine.

Someone dropped in front of him, and Cloud sharply pulled back, ready to flee or fight. One fist was already clenched in preparation, but the figure before him asked for a punch in the face for an entirely different reason.

"Up and at em'! Materia's today, and I don't want to miss a bit of it." The boy laughed easily, a bright smile on his face. The other cadets in the barracks were groaning at him but Cloud only stared. Daniel Gavish's face had been half-burnt off and warped with pain in his death. Cloud couldn't remember the circumstances, but that gruesome image swam right into focus as he stared at him, perfectly numb with shock.

"You're back in the clouds, Cloud." In a singsong voice at a near-painful octave this early in the morning, Dan's hips wiggled in a gesture not unlike a smug Yuffie. Cloud twitched in response, his fist whitening with tension, hearing those words echo from long years past. "Can't miss theory or Sergeant'll have your ass." The boy waved and practically skipped out of the room, fully dressed and ready to go. The other boys, done pulling on their own clothes by now, fished out any necessary books and paper and also began to leave. As they trickled out, a painful cold settled over Cloud's chest.

The very last of them spared the blond a glance. He said nothing as he left.

Cloud sat in the silence of the room carefully counting his heartbeats to reassure himself this simply couldn't be real. Then in one violent motion he turned and punched a fist into the steel wall. His knuckles broke and bled, but for Cloud the pain was insignificant in comparison to the overwhelming truth. He swallowed harshly. Something was at work here, something that didn't take into account his feelings or care that this would be the string to unbind him. With a frustrated cry, Cloud slammed his other fist into the same wall, not even denting the metal and ignoring the smarting it caused. Both hands bled rivets, and Cloud knew his face was screwed up and red from all of the emotions going through him. He couldn't name half of them, but he could feel the hot, blinding press of them clamoring for room.

Vomit crept up his throat again, and his eyes began to burn. Ruthlessly he suppressed both urges and lowered his head, searching for his stoic strength.

More in control now, he relaxed his arms but kept the knuckles in place before allowing them to come away from the wall to splay out his hands, palms pressed against the steel wall. He couldn't pull his eyes away from the image of his red and bloodied hands, and soon the burning behind his eyes messed up his vision until his trembling hands were blurring with the wall. Too much emotion that couldn't be suppressed left him unable to remove his hands or stop himself from pushing as hard as possible against the walls of the barracks. He pushed against the insurmountable walls of the room, struggling blindly to fight the inevitable.


	2. Do You Believe in Materia?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cloud's first day back as a cadet doesn't go so smoothly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I own nothing and make no money from this work. Anything recognizable to the Final Fantasy VII series and its associated parts belongs to Square Enix and affiliated companies.

The first day was over and Cloud was wide-awake. The barracks were silent save for the steady breathing of the sleeping cadets. Their days were filled with exhaustive exercise and information intake. The months of training as a recruit at Shinra were for solidifying the basics. Only after getting into SOLDIER did the truly extensive training really begin. Zack had told stories of it, and Cloud had longed for the kind of one-on-one training.

Cloud had always secretly hoped Zack might be his teacher for the buster sword. He'd especially longed for it after Zack's death, mourning a combined mentor and friend. Zack had eventually inadvertently become that, but it was not the way Cloud had wanted it to be.

Remembering Zack's untimely death in such clarity reminded Cloud of what he didn't remember. Consciously, many names, faces, and minor events had long been lost, but as Cloud met those ghosts again they came back with astounding force. He assumed that after absorbing parts of Zack and confusing their separate lives, and then after the trauma from Hojo, Nibelheim, and then Sephiroth, Cloud's mind had simply pushed these seemingly irrelevant things aside. Now it was all coming back—along with a splitting migraine.

Cloud had forgotten what a headache felt like. Mako prevented most ailments.

The day continued to loop in his head while his temples throbbed to the tune of his heartbeat. It was impossible to sleep after the craziness of a day spent reliving his life in Shinra. Before the Nibelheim Incident. Before everything.

* * *

Once he'd gathered his wits that morning he'd been sick in the bathroom, unable to vomit because he'd had no food in his stomach though it still convulsed painfully. Cloud was thankful the others had already left as he stumbled out. He consciously avoided the mirror as he left the bathroom. He didn't want to face the inevitable sight of his youth.

His first class of the day—once he'd found it and gotten thoroughly chastised for being late—had been completely forgotten almost as soon as relieved it. His mind was stuck repeating what incidents he knew were his and which were Zack's, and what facts of his life in Shinra he could remember.

Shinra was a highly organized, efficient, and militaristic system that ran well but rigidly. There was a set curriculum in each class, alphabetically assigned seating, a standard code of punishment for disobedience, and all of it enforced, which was easily the most exceptional thing about it. It was a strict regime meant to turn out SOLDIERs (or at least army troopers) like an assembly line, and it was actually quite successful. If cadets couldn't keep up with the program, they were kicked out point-blank. When you signed the contract to join the SOLDIER program, the promise was to join the regulation army if you couldn't cut it—the fate of most cadets including Cloud.

That being said, Cloud had been one of the few students that actually tried, and he'd been bullied badly for it (though he couldn't remember anything specific, he just knew he had), and his grades hadn't reflected his motivation. He'd been the runt of the class, and it showed. Even with a good grade on written exams, the physical tests were what the military was about, and Cloud had failed at that spectacularly.

Unfortunately, failure now meant more than just the humiliation of underpaying, grueling work in the regular army. And as Cloud zoned out to the droning of the teacher, he could envision it perfectly:

There was Sephiroth, the wild halo of his hair wreathing him while standing on a gory battlefield triumphant; Zack's buster sword laying in the dust on the cliff where he died; Hojo parading the battlefield victoriously, as though he had single-handedly won the war; AVALANCHE in their homes with their friends and family, eyes glazed in death; the Planet dying and Aeris' flower garden withering with it; and Cloud, in all of this, lying at the bottom of Aeris' lake, unable to get up because the water was everywhere and he didn't have the strength to fight it.

The bell rang then, jerking Cloud and his peers back to the present.

The present was almost as dreamlike as that nightmare had been though. Walking through the halls of Shinra, Cloud couldn't deny how real it felt and how he'd been suffering a dizzying amount of déjà vu all day. The people, the classrooms, the routine, it was very familiar and all the more irritating because of it.

The second class of the morning was theory, essentially just another lecture class and had almost no meaning in SOLDIER and virtually no use outside of it. Cloud had intended to go even knowing that, and had tailed the other boys there because he was only half-sure where he was going, but then at the other end of the hall approached a SOLDIER.

Zack.

Just the sight was enough to make Cloud stumble, but this wasn't the dirty, messy, haggard Zack who hid exhaustion behind a smile in the back of a yellow truck. It was Zack Fair looking like the First Class SOLDIER he was, with a modified uniform, boots shined, hair in every direction, and a smooth, confident stride as he talked easily to the SOLDIER next to him. He had a real smile on his face and the distinctive glowing eyes of all SOLDIERs, though on Zack it wasn't intimidating. In fact, friendly interest was obvious in the way he looked at the cadets walking by, many of whom were looking right back at him in awe, Cloud included.

First Class SOLDIERs were easy to spot because they had the freedom to wear whatever they wanted. Zack usually went with a customized uniform, removing the sleeves, foregoing the helmet, and changing the material of the clothing to suit his needs, though he stuck with the black color (Cloud barely remembered how viciously Zack had complained about the Second Class purple). Despite that, Zack was a well-known face around Shinra because of his charisma and friendliness.

Cloud tensed up more and more with every step Zack took closer. Just seeing his old friend so carefree and happy was as almost painful, because Cloud knew it didn't last. But right now he looked so alive, so much _realer_ than he did in Cloud's memories. The urge to reach out and touch the SOLDIER was stronger than anything he'd ever felt before, but Cloud clenched his teeth, pulled on that iron will, and looked away.

Zack still had that spiked thorn-bush hair, and it was midnight black though shorter than Cloud remembered it. The other cadets' looks of envy were nothing compared to the way Cloud felt. The blond didn't see Zack the way the other boys did, not just as an amazing SOLDIER they admired. Cloud saw a million images of Zack all at once: his goofy smile; his face set in concentration as he swung the buster sword; how big and heavy his hands were when they mussed up Cloud's hair; Zack in the pick-up truck, fuzzy around the edges but smiling all the while; Zack shouting something, concern and worry in his voice but his words indistinct; and Zack's face, peaceful in death.

The double vision was powerful, but that last image of Zack's bloodied face so utterly relaxed, the lines of stress Cloud hadn't been able to see until they were gone, it was haunting. Moreover, it was prophetic. Could he save Zack? Sephiroth?

Those words were ringing in his ears so loud that Cloud didn't realize he had stopped walking until someone bumped his shoulder hard enough to make him stumble a step forward. "Keep walking, Strife," sneered Reno, the red-haired Turk-to-be. Cloud stood frozen as the younger visage of Reno laughed in his face and walked away.

It had been too much. Overwhelmed, Cloud skipped his next class to be alone. He escaped to the far side of the training fields, looking for the most privacy he could find. There was a little spot of grass on the farthest side behind a shed that he headed to almost without thinking. He'd escaped there before, he knew in his bones.

Most of the fields were tough sand and dirt taken from the desert surrounding Midgar and ideal for the intense running and exercises cadets and SOLDIERs did. Not quite jogging but hurriedly walking, Cloud abandoned any idea of secrecy, as the open fields didn't offer shelter from prying eyes. Finally on the soft grass in the back corner, behind a maintenance shed that would hide him from prying eyes, he collapsed on his back to stare up into the polluted sky, willing away tears. He, the great warrior who took down Shinra's General and saved the world, was on the verge of crying. So much emotion, more than Cloud could ever remember feeling, was hitting him all at once. Zack, Reno, SOLDIER, the helplessness, the anger, the fear…

Lying on that field, Cloud could see every bad outcome in his probable future it seemed. It felt like there were only a handful of good ends and an infinite number of bad. Worse than that though, his chances of success in saving anyone seemed to grow slimmer with every second.

* * *

What Cloud hadn't been able to see while lying there looking at the sky and begging the Planet to bring him back to a life he had at least been able to live, was Zack's eyes on him. After walking by the cadets, Zack had headed up several floors to retrieve some files from another office. On his way out he'd passed a window looking out at the fields and spotted Cloud's unmistakable hair rushing through the fields. Zack stopped short, knowing full well the other cadets had been heading to class, and watched the blond scurry behind the shed, no doubt to hide.

Zack, as Lieutenant General of the SOLDIER division of the army, had more free time than other SOLDIERs because he wasn't as constrained by training regiments, and if he didn't, he made more free time for himself. Zack wasn't lazy when it came to sword fighting and training, but he did manage to evade as much paperwork as possible. He found various excuses to get out of it, some more ridiculous than others. One legitimate excuse he used though was visiting the cadets to encourage them in their training. Seeing a First Class SOLDIER at all, especially with Zack's reputation and his 300lbs buster sword, tended to do that without much effort.

Zack enjoyed those visits, but no one had quite stuck out in a group more than the blond boy with a chocobo's haircut. The first day Zack saw him had been the first day for the autumn group of cadets to start learning basic sword-fighting techniques. They had been handed out the wooden practice swords when Zack slipped in the backdoor and hid in the corner. The First zeroed in almost automatically on the blond on the end, his hair a beacon. The way he stood relative to the other boys made him seem set apart from the group, which had caught Zack's eye. Zack was, self-admittedly, a sucker for the underdog and pariah cliché. Sephiroth seemed to think him some kind of idealist.

One of the instructors had eventually noticed Zack lurking in the back of the room, so he came out of the corner of the room. He made sure to move around the line behind the cadets—just to make them sweat a little for fun—thereby coming up and around right next to the blond on the end. In passing him, Zack could feel the boy's tension peak, his hand trembling around the wooden sword. Zack, trying to be comforting, put a hand on his shoulder briefly, and met the bright, wide blue eyes with a smile. He kept going around then, making a mental note to keep an eye on him.

Zack had kept that promise to himself, though it had been difficult at times. The boy struggled in some things and did average in others, but excelled in little. Zack's heart went out to him. He could tell the blond tried hard, harder than most of the other boys, but he just seemed to fall behind the others, the runt of the litter. It didn't help that he hadn't seemed to make any friends from what few times Zack had seen him.

The First turned away from the window, smiling slightly to himself. Runt or not, Cloud didn't look like the sort to give-up, and Zack silently willed him to believe in hard work overcoming all obstacles, because Zack certainly did. He remembered a day when all he'd wanted to be was a hero. He'd grown from that goal, but he hoped Cloud Strife had something he yearned to do too.

* * *

Cloud rolled over on his creaky mattress to lie flat on his back. He examined the lines of the bunk above him, and the nails screwed into the wood, and wondered how many people had lain on this bed before him. How many after?

The bunk above and to his right groaned ominously as Dan turned over in his sleep. Cloud didn't turn his head or move, and the boy's breathing evened out in a few moments.

* * *

As nice as Dan Gavish was to him, being bunkmates and all, the boy had more clouds and fluff between his ears than most people thought Cloud did. He tended to forget the little things in favor of what held his attention, and Cloud had always ended up a little thing to Dan. The blond was too quiet for him, too mellow and unresponsive to garner much attention. To Dan, and undoubtedly the rest of the barracks, Cloud was some one-dimensional cadet with a funny name and hair.

Because of this and Cloud's general loner nature, he typically sat alone in the canteen eating the questionable tasting and textured meals Shinra called food. The crowds of people in this cafeteria were mostly cadets, with a smattering of employees and a small number of SOLDIERs who happened to be on this side of the compound. Cloud sat alone, as he had throughout his time as a recruit, and it didn't bother him; he was grateful in fact. He preferred anonymity.

After lunch there were two more periods, all hands-on work with materia. Dan was easily the most enthusiastic of the class, though the others were looking more awake as they stood in a line in the large gym. Dan was the most adept with materia, managing to produce more magic than anyone else in the class, but that wasn't saying much, as Cloud quickly realized.

"Wake-up ladies! I get you after lunch _every Monday,_ and you all stuff yourselves and come here asleep!" Instructor Hade was undoubtedly the loudest instructor Cloud had ever had. He beat the conditioning coach with volume to spare. The worst part of Instructor Hade's bellowing was that the materia practice gyms were made of metal, and the high ceilings for lighting magic echoed and amplified his voice. He was often drowned out by his own echoes, which made it difficult to understand him.

"Since none of you ladies can use even a little magic," Dan whimpered a bit but did not assert himself, "I'll run over this for the last time!" The person next to Cloud took an unconscious step back as the instructor leaned dangerously forward. Hade made the same explanation every week, nearly word-for-word, and Cloud could see Reno out of the corner of his eye starting to mouth along, a cocky look on his face the blond recognized from years later. "Using materia requires a part of the mind you don't normally use! It requires will and the raw energy inside you you've _never used before_. Some of you may _never_ use it at the rate you're going, and you'll never be SOLDIER if you can't do magic!" People rolled their eyes as Hade kept going for several more minutes essentially repeating the same mantra, before finally letting them go to practice.

They were moved into spots along the walls, coated in protective paints and made of reinforced metal meant to withstand the extreme temperatures of magical attacks. Cloud managed to be right next to the door since he was at the end of the line like always. Old armguards and bangles were handed out, many dented and reeking of dried sweat. Cloud held his between two fingers almost afraid to put it on. He was capable of using the fire materia they were now handing out without it, but he didn't want to risk exposing himself. He was still figuring things out.

Gingerly he slipped the faded iron armguard over his hand and past his wrist. The fire materia was handed to him, and he slotted it with ease, the only good thing about this equipment having been used so much. Hade took his positions in the center of the room and explained the exercise. They were to attempt to produce a flame, ideally long enough to touch the wall. The concept behind this was to later mold that tongue into a ball and create an explosion away from the user. The cadets however, could usually get a couple of sparks or at least make the materia glow and heat up if they tried hard enough. Dan could get a little flame about the half the length of his hand out of the materia.

Cloud hadn't had a problem with materia after mako-exposure. Mako created a deeper connection with the part of the mind that activated materia, as materia was primarily made of condensed natural mako. After all the mako he had been in with Hojo, Cloud could have used Comet2 twice and still remain on his feet.

The ability to use materia without mako injections, however, was somewhat more difficult and took talent and practice. It tended to "click" with some people. Barret had never really gotten the hang of it while Red XIII and Aeris had excelled. Yuffie was adept at just about anything she was given.

The hair on Cloud's neck prickled. Somebody was either staring at him or coming towards him, he couldn't tell which. He didn't want to turn his head and possibly meet Reno's eyes, but the feeling wasn't going away.

Cloud must have taken too long to think about it, because Instructor Hade informed Cloud from about two inches from his ear that, " _daydreaming_ won't make materia work!"

The sudden voice in his sensitive ear startled Cloud so badly that he reflexively jumped, his hand slipping into his left sleeve for the spare knife he kept there only to meet air. He fumbled with his hand in his sleeve, realizing a moment too late that he was completely unarmed save for the fire materia. Hade was just lucky Cloud hadn't thought to use it—he might be a pile of ash if he were.

It must have been dumb luck that Hade was a magic-user and a poor hand-to-hand fighter because he either didn't notice or didn't comprehend Cloud's reaction. However, he did notice the confused look on Cloud's face though and mistook it for stupidity. "I said daydreaming _won't_ make materia work!" Something wet touched Cloud's face, and he resisted the urge to wipe the spit away rudely. When Cloud nodded mutely, Hade marched off, duty done. Cloud rubbed the spittle off mutinously and turned back to the wall, just stopping himself from rolling his eyes. Even if he were technically sixteen years old, he wouldn't give in to such childish moves.

Readjusting the armguard, Cloud focused back on the class. Using materia was also about confidence. Most talents or skills worked that way in general. Probably one of the greatest problems with the cadets was that they believed they couldn't use materia, and so they didn't. Dan had managed a lick of flame, and several had glowing balls, but otherwise there was no real magic to be seen.

Cloud glanced down at the quietly green ball in the only slot of the armguard. Establishing a flame would be simple, except toning it down would take a lot of control. If Dan got barely anything, Cloud should have almost nothing. All he had to do was use a tiny amount of energy and maintain complete focus so he didn't do anything more. If he could make the materia glow, that should be enough.

It was hard to judge how much energy to put in, and to Cloud's horror what he thought was a small amount proved to be far too much. The materia in his armguard flared up and burned with heat he could feel through the metal—proof that it was cheap—and suddenly flames shot out of his extended hand in one long stream. In a matter of seconds the thinner, less-reinforced metal of the door that his hand had been vaguely pointing at had been burnt until it melted away, leaving white-hot edges that smoldered. The flame had been so long and so hot that there was a distinct hole in the door that Cloud could see right through.

Cloud was probably the most surprised person in the room. He had never been particularly brilliant with materia, but melting objects was usually a Fire3—or Fire2 if you were Aeris—kind of power. Cloud looked down at the materia numbly and wondered if he'd misread the level.

The room buzzed with talk as the cadet next to Cloud examined the hole. It was easily as wide as his spread hand. The other cadets were muttering about it and wondering just how Cloud did it, their voices rising to the ceiling so Cloud felt like he was standing in an auditorium full of people and not a class of thirty. Instructor Hade cut into the noise and slapped a heavy hand on Cloud's shoulder, praising him at the top of his lungs as he did so.

Cloud was too shocked to register the praise or the suspicion. He looked down at his hand, not a burn or blister on it, then at the materia, which cheerfully winked a Fire1 materia level at him. His first day and he'd made a spectacle of himself already.

* * *

Cloud put his hands behind his head on the pillow and thought it over. He'd been going through various theories in his head to explain the materia incident for most of the day, but most of them required a real stretch of imagination. Perhaps he had some trace mako in his system. Or he'd been so messed up with everything that happened, that he'd used a lot more MP than he thought. He hadn't felt that depleted though, but maybe this body just didn't know how to tell yet.

Either way, Cloud firmly thought, it was a one-time event. When he would fail to reproduce similar outcomes in later classes and got a better handle of his own personal control, everyone would forget about it.

It was a freak accident caused by the stress. That was the only thing that made sense.

* * *

Support Materia class was better at least. Instructor Hade has already informed the teacher of Cloud's feat, so no one expected anything of him. By the end of class Cloud had gotten the hang of exerting absolutely no energy and screwing up his face like he expected something to happen.

To Cloud's silent amusement, people had taken the initiative to try harder. He supposed they figured that if some nobody like him could melt a metal door then surely they could detoxify a rat.

At dinner, Cloud contemplated every possible reason for the materia incident. He was just getting on to any possible defects in the materia itself when he stopped mid-thought. Someone was alarmingly close to his right side. He whipped around fast, forcing down the automatic need to strike first.

It was only Reno sneaking up on him. The redhead was just a couple of paces away, and he looked mildly surprised at how jumpy Cloud was. Still, now that he had Cloud's attention he sidled in a little closer. The blond could just barely hear some of the redhead's friends guffawing a couple tables over.

"Go ahead and see if a magic trick'll get you into SOLDIER," he said, goading Cloud and reading his sixteen-year old self like a book. "Magic corps isn't where the glory is, ya know." Reno laughed loudly then made a face at his friend, who mimicked it back at him.

* * *

Cloud had known somehow that he'd met Reno before AVALANCHE, but the memories had been fuzzy at best. Looking back on some of those conversations as he lay in bed, he realized Reno had definitely recognized him and had been subtly making fun of him, bringing back episodes from their shared cadet days. AVALANCHE and Cloud had either misinterpreted or ignored those taunts.

Reno must have known Cloud wasn't the SOLDIER he and Shinra had thought himself to be, but he hadn't said anything. Maybe he took perverse pleasure in Cloud's lie? But he had implied it whenever they'd run into each other, though Cloud had been perfectly blind to it. The redhead must have thought Cloud was a rock since he hadn't risen to the bait.

Cloud shifted in the bunk trying to find a vaguely comfortable position, thinking that he must have unnerved the redhead back then without even trying.

* * *

Reno had clearly been a bit of bully when they were cadets, Cloud mused as Reno's friends at the next table over shouted something to their friend. Cloud had failed the exam, but the Turks must have picked up Reno sometime around then because he didn't remember Reno's outcome at all. In Cloud's future the boy had changed from the teenager he was here, but not that much.

Cloud had forgotten him, probably because Zack hadn't been bullied as a recruit. Still, it was perversely nice to see a familiar face, even if it was currently smugly laughing at him. With each time Reno struck out at Cloud, the blond could see some of the alternate Reno; the loyalty, the depth, the intelligence that the cadets and Cloud hadn't seen before he'd joined the Turks. It was something no one had seen before Tseng. The Turks had become a family for Reno. Cloud hadn't really understood that until he'd started working a bit for Neo-Shinra. The way Reno clung to his remaining Turks and the familiarity of Shinra spoke of a deeper connection, the kind AVALANCHE had.

Cloud reflected on that relationship for a second too long perhaps. The lack of reaction on Cloud's part was disconcerting for Reno. The blond was usually worth it for the clenched fist, whitening lips, and red face. The fact that Cloud didn't tattle to anyone was a bonus too. This completely blank Cloud, in fact, the blond was almost ignoring him, was unsettling and different. Something else was on Cloud's mind.

Reno secretly wondered if something had happened, and if so he wanted to know what. Reno's naturally nosy nature had gotten him in and out of trouble all his life. He had lived in the slums digging up information, particularly on the history of pre-Shinra times—a dangerous and difficult thing to get your hands on. It had been fascinating, but when Reno came of age he went to join Shinra because he had aspirations no gang was going to help him reach. Not to mention it put him in a good position to dig a little more into the empire.

He looked once more over at Cloud, who was spacing out still and looking utterly distracted. He would riffle through the blond's things later to see if he could find anything.

* * *

Cloud had left dinner early, barely eating anything, to hide away on his bed and hope for sleep. Of course, he'd ended up ruminating on the day, and if he could make any more mistakes than he already had. If he woke up tomorrow in his cottage outside Midgar then what happened wouldn't matter. But if he didn't…

The most important thing for Cloud to do would be to stop Nibelheim from ever happening. If it could be stopped, then the events it set in motion would be stopped, and the root of the problem solved. To do this, however, Cloud needed to go to Nibelheim. From there, he could destroy the books that Sephiroth would read, possibly kill Jenova if he was strong enough, get Vincent, and thereby end things.

Admittedly, SOLDIER wasn't a necessity. He could easily drop out of the recruitment program, defect from the regular army, and make his way over there on foot, but Cloud didn't want that. He felt selfish for thinking it, but he hadn't been selfish in a long time. This was another chance at a dream he'd long since given up on. If he got into SOLDIER, he would be closer to Zack and Sephiroth, and he'd have the benefits of that training and… mako to bolster him.

Sure, running around the world killing monsters would get him back into the swing of it in no time, but mako enhancement was unmatched, and the personalized training of SOLDIER would be far better than anything he could pick up in the wilderness. It was better to have the greatest strength he could achieve too, because even if Jenova was comatose in Nibelheim, who knew what she was capable of?

Of course, he had to consider failure too. If he failed the SOLDIER Exam again, then he would be in the regulation army and would have to wait for the inevitable mission to Nibelheim to actually do something. He'd probably also have to deal with the disappointment of never achieving his childhood dream of his twice. If he then dropped out of the army then he'd be a deserter, and he'd have to deal with the backlash from that.

Then of course, the ultimate failure: if he somehow managed to screw up, whether he was killed or permanently injured by a monster or something else happened, then it would be over. Sephiroth would probably run around the world at Jenova's beck and call, Zack might save someone else from Hojo—and that shot a sharp pain through Cloud's heart—and in the end…

Cloud shook his head roughly and sat up, closed his eyes and did one of Tifa's breathing exercises. There was no chance he could let history repeat itself or insecurities get in his way. Sephiroth and Zack needed this second chance—they needed Cloud to succeed.

Cloud needed himself to succeed. He'd probably lose his mind reliving everything the way it had gone before.

Eventually he fell asleep, but it was a fitful rest. The blond had lived alone for so many years that all the breathing and movement around him made his disturbed his sleep, especially after living with monsters lurking outside his house. He woke early in the morning to full-body flashes of mako-induced pain and a great agony on his left arm at the elbow joint. The vein there was stark against his skin.

He bit his lip until it had faded to manageable levels, focusing on one point of the far wall and nothing else. The morning hadn't come yet and no one stirred. Alone, Cloud nursed his still aching arm and tried to find the foggy realm of sleep.


	3. Finding Your Feet

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cloud starts to get a handle on things and plans start to form.

Tuesday was probably one of the most dreaded days for the cadets: conditioning.

Conditioning meant running around outside, no matter the weather, doing boring, repetitive drills, and sweating your weight in water while wearing heavy uniforms. It was also the one class that could not be skipped because it meant doing the same drills alone on a Saturday.

Cloud was already dressed and awake by the time everyone else was sitting up in bed. Not only was he used to waking at dawn, but he'd had the opposite of a restful night's sleep. Dan was still considerably brighter than the rest of the boys, and practically leaped out the door while everyone else stumbled out. Reno groggily sneered at his back.

Breakfast began in almost complete silence as was the norm because no one was quite awake enough for chatter. Cloud didn't look at his food but rather at the table and chewed mechanically. He would not admit to being nervous, but he felt pressured to compete at a higher level than the cadets. More than that though, today would really let him judge what else was different. After the materia experience he was feeling wary of his own body. At sixteen he hadn't been capable of melting doors. At twenty-eight he could have with effort. This caution was probably good, he considered, and he needed to be aware of his limits, but all the logic in the world couldn't stop the butterflies in his stomach.

By the end of breakfast people looked a little more awake. They'd had their coffee and some food in their stomachs, but all it did was remind them that today was Tuesday: Hell Day. Whatever fantasy they'd entertained of sick instructors (impossible, there was always a substitute who was worse), and days off were shot as soon as the whistle blew and they started their three-mile jog.

For two and a half hours straight, the cadets ran laps and sprints with intermittent breaks for push-ups and occasionally for water. Midgar's typical haze of smoke trapped the heat of the sun in a balloon around the city, and it was oppressive.

Cloud was accustomed to running for long hours and could easily take his mind away from it and think. AVALANCHE had frequently been without transport, so running or walking for sometimes hundreds of miles was their only option, and you quickly learned the right mindset to do it.

When the instructors made them stop for their first major break for water after that warm-up jog and a few more exercises to "get their hearts pumping", which was a laughable understatement, Cloud could feel his every muscle vibrating and his clothing was soaked. Despite the fact that his body screamed for rest and water, he'd kept up with the others, though it hadn't been easy. Cloud glanced around at the other cadets; most of them had their hands on their knees, red-faced and panting, even Reno, who looked as bad as Cloud felt. This kind of physical exertion was easier for the sons of miners or the like, people who had done hard labor before coming to Shinra. Many of the city recruits though had little experience with this kind of workout.

The blond turned away from Reno as Dan came to stand next to him. They both stood, still panting lightly as their hearts slowed down. Dan gulped down a couple more mouthfuls of water before dramatically flinging himself onto the hard-packed earth next to Cloud. The blond ignored Dan's behavior and looked out across the fields instead, staring at the way the air above the ground shimmered with such intense heat.

Dan didn't seem to mind that Cloud was paying no attention to him. "Thank goodness I'll focus on materia. No running. I can be fat and lazy and still electrocute people." Dan smiled into his words as Cloud glanced back down at him, wondering if he should mention that physical strength played a part in MP. But when he did glance down, Dan's eyes were glazed over, dreaming of SOLDIER one day. Cloud was still staring at his face taken aback, aware that he had once looked and acted like that. It was like looking into the face of a naïve child.

Cloud turned away. He wasn't sure what he felt towards Dan, or even towards all these other hopeful _children_ who were pitting all their dreams on becoming tools of Shinra. It was all worth it to them now, but they would see it all one day and know that maybe they should have just stayed home on recruitment day.

Cloud shook his head from those morbid thoughts. He was perfectly aware of this truth though, and he wasn't dropping out. For many people—his eyes flickered to Reno very briefly—this was their only way out of their life. Cloud couldn't fault them for that, or for their dreams, no matter how naïve.

Break ended at the whistle, and the boys trotted back out on to the field. They started up the second half until lunch. It was focused on upper-body training, meant to strengthen arm, shoulder, and abdominal muscles so they had greater speed and agility in combat. Cloud was particularly motivated as soon as he realized twenty push-ups were pushing his biceps' limit. Annoyed, he gritted his teeth and did the full set of thirty-five, though his arms collapsed under him as soon as he stopped. He'd never be able to hold the buster sword if he could barely manage his own weight.

When they'd finally finished the morning sets, sweaty and exhausted, the air conditioning of the main facility for lunch was greeted with as much enthusiasm as the tired cadets could muster. The cafeteria stank of their sweat and grime, but they ate without complaint and only a bare murmur of talk. Cloud could barely taste his food.

They trooped out after lunch though, marginally more energetic, and spent the rest of the day was spent in various training activities, each as tiring as the next. They did the traditional steps through tires, various lifting exercises, climbing practice, how to run through mud, anything instructors thought might be useful, painful, or humiliating to do.

By the end of the day the blond and everyone else was ready to collapse. His muscles shook under the skin like they might come loose, and he trembled from the effort to walk back to the barrack. He gathered his clothes and headed to the showers like the others. The cadets' shower room was full of steam by the time he had wobbled his way there. He was about mid-way through the line forming along the wall, and it felt good to sag against the cool tiles. This workout, though more intensive than he'd anticipated, left him feeling lax and happy. Cloud had always loved a good workout, especially one that left his muscles loose and a little adrenaline in his system. It also helped when it came to sleep.

Shinra was pretty cheap when it came to their recruits. Second Class SOLDIERs got showers in their four-man rooms, but Third Class SOLDIERs had communal showers, and the cadet's bathing rooms were like the regulation army's ones. It was two long rows of showers, never enough for everyone, with thin walls between each showerhead. The drainage system was old, so water leaked all over the floors and pooled where the tiles had been broken. There were no doors on the stalls, only thin curtains that were completely see-through and moved aside when the water hit them. Most stalls didn't even have a hook for a towel.

Mirrors were located above the sinks. Cloud avoided looking at these as he walked to the vacated shower on the end. He stripped down in the tiny cubicle, pushed his clothes into the corner, which was thankfully still dry, and turned the water up hot.

Cloud had remembered his experience the first time he showered with the other cadets—one of a handful of memories he'd managed to keep somehow. Nibelheim had been backwater compared to Midgar, and public bathing rooms had been unimaginable to a young Cloud. He had been awkward as he'd showered and changed as fast as possible, overly aware of how young and underdeveloped his body was, and how at ease the others appeared about their own. He hadn't become comfortable with it until after Nibelheim. After that it hadn't seemed so important.

Now Cloud had little care for his body beyond general health and cleanliness. Even now, he wondered just what he'd been expecting his sixteen-year old body to look like back then. Hardened muscles would form with all the training, and at this age he was a bit scrawny, but there wasn't any fat except a little on his cheeks, and he had fairly broad shoulders. More importantly, Cloud knew full well what he'd come to look like with enough work.

He still had a couple of inches to grow, and seeing his flat stomach without ridges of muscle and touching the thinness of his arms, he felt… young. And small. Cloud stood there under the water thinking about that, before reaching up to touch his unmarked left ear. Maybe getting that piercing again would make him feel older. Or even a tattoo. Being physically submerged in mako burned off tattoos, but SOLDIERs didn't actually skinny-dip in tubes of it like Cloud and Zack had been subjected to.

Cloud dropped that line of thought before it could go further. He finished his shower quickly, turned off the water, and pulled his clothes on before he left.

Back in the barracks it was quiet. The evenings were technically meant for self-improvement, but most cadets just slacked off and relaxed. Tuesdays were forever the exception though; instead of card games, parties, and loud music, nobody had the energy to do anything but sleep.

Cloud laid on his bed and felt the looseness and relaxation from the hard workout slip away bit by bit. His high from the excellent workout had temporarily blinded him to the fact that, despite being able to keep up, he was one of the people who had probably worked the hardest to make sure of that. It made him irrationally angry and frustrated at his own weakness.

He knew better than to pin his hopes too high, he had thought, but the materia burst had given him some secret hope. The disappointment was bitter. He would probably be among the sorest of the cadets tomorrow and that irked him. He wanted to move faster, to lift more, to practice with people _on his level_ and not the cadets'.

That was the problem, he realized just as fast as he'd thought it. He wanted to be twenty-eight again with all that experience and strength. He wasn't that. He didn't have the levels, the power, the speed he'd had before. Mako and SOLDIER would give him a jumpstart, though nothing like what Hojo did. Nothing would make Hojo's invasive meddling worth it though. He would have to accept that he would grow stronger with time, but hopefully faster than before because he already had all the prior experience.

Instead of dwelling on how much he couldn't do, he tried to focus on what he _could_ do, now that he was sixteen again. He could get drunk now—granted he didn't really _like_ losing his inhibitions like that, but to even have the ability to get drunk was nice. Mako made it nearly impossible. He could train out old habits before they ever became muscle memory, like that forward reach he did sometimes when his opponent was smaller than him. That was a plus.

Cloud soon began to run out of pros though, and his list dwindled. He needed to sleep. The lights went out as Cloud drifted off sooner than he expected, though the other boys had turned in long before him.

That night he dreamed of vivid green again, of the tube he had lived five years of his life in. He woke early, feeling a spasm or two as he waited for dawn to break. Undiluted mako like what he had been exposed to pulsated with a steady rhythm. Hojo had called it the Planet's Heartbeat.

* * *

Wednesday began with Dan nearly falling off his bed. The brown-haired boy had always been up like a shot, but today he'd been too close to the edge of his top-bunk. He wobbled, before he found his voice and shouted in surprise, waking everyone up ten minutes before the alarm. Reno had blearily thrown some curses at him and gone back to sleep, the others following suit. This morning Dan was the second up though, Cloud had beat him by an hour.

They left for breakfast once everyone had gotten organized. Cloud had left in the middle of all the changing clothes and finding equipment, and was subsequently one of the first in line for food. He took his oatmeal and yellow apple to his seat, the same table he had sat at everyday. It was a fight with his body not to wince or move gingerly as he crossed the room to sit down. It felt like every muscle in his body had gone through a shredder. He'd done what he could in bed, relaxing and stretching, but it had only marginally helped.

The cafeteria slowly filled up as cadets from other recruitment dates shuffled in, along with the odd employee. Each recruitment day was made up of four barracks, so thirty-two boys total, but most identified themselves by bunker and not date. The eight boys in each bunker were not as close as brothers, but they did prove to prefer each other to boys in another group. In the end though, the SOLDIER Exam would pit everyone against each other—every man for himself, and Shinra out for them all.

Cloud finished breakfast on that happy note, and trooped down with the rest of the cadets to martial arts training in a nearby building. This was a favorite for many who took to the hand-to-hand style of combat. It was also the chance to beat each other up without getting yelled at.

People milled around the room before the instructors came in. As usual when left alone, the cadets broke into little groups. Cloud moved to lean against one wall, watching them. Looking at them now, huddled in groups making fun of each other made Cloud a little annoyed. It was…childish to him. He saw it now without the secret envy and curiosity to know what they were saying, but as petty and frivolous. Who cared? Professor Hojo, a couple hundred feet underground, was turning innocent boys like them into monsters for fun. He glared at the boys that glanced over to him, but otherwise didn't move.

The two instructors made their entrance and cadets scrambled into line. The gymnasium for martial arts practice was huge and gaping. The ceiling sported a number of beams and pillars stretching from end to end. SOLDIERs practiced balance at those treacherous heights sometimes to show off. More than one had fallen to a couple of broken bones. The wonders of mako spared them from what would have been a sure death or at least severe injury for the un-enhanced.

They did some warm-up laps and stretching to start off. Many cadets like Cloud were sore after all the exercise yesterday, and they could feel it through the running and stretching. Cloud rubbed his aching muscles but knew that in time the soreness would fade. "No sympathy" was almost Shinra's motto. The instructors didn't care that a cadet could hardly even sit up that morning. They had to fight or leave.

Back in the line, the instructors demonstrated the two-part kata they had been practicing for the last two weeks, one offensive one defensive. All of the steps were familiar to Cloud, though they weren't geared for weapon use so Cloud hadn't done it in maybe a decade. Bored, his attention wavered until they were split up into pairs.

Cloud ended up facing an average cadet who looked almost exactly like the typical citizen in Midgar. Cloud's memory jumped as he got a good look at his face, suddenly remembering him from the regulation army. They had lockers next to each other, and the blond could remember, to his surprise, the nametag stamped on his uniform—James Merton. He had short-cut brown hair and slightly bulkier build, along with a bigheaded expression that spelled trouble. Cloud was hardly intimidated though. He had worked with Tifa to improve his basic martial arts skills because they were lacking in comparison to his sword work. Though he didn't excel at it, Cloud could hold his ground in hand-to-hand combat if it came down to it.

There was one problem though. He could hold his ground… in the future. The blond wasn't entirely sure of where he stood in the general fighting department now. Clearly he was physically not where he used to be, but his materia use had proven to be off the charts. He had no muscle memory ingrained yet, but his brain knew what to do even though his body didn't. With practice he would hopefully be flying up the levels, though it wouldn't be good to get ahead of himself because nothing was killed faster than by cockiness. So Cloud started off with the offensive kata the instructors had been reviewing, keeping is slow to make sure he recalled it correctly and being sure to keep a steady pace and soft hits.

Clearly James wasn't a total buffoon and knew the defensive kata well, and he repelled Cloud's attacks with ease. There was an arrogant laziness to the way he did it that was aggravating. James sped up as they switched parts and he took the offensive, and Cloud matched him easily. When Cloud again took the offensive however, the blond slowed the speed back down.

In response to this, the other teen sneered at Cloud, who was concentrating so hard on controlling himself and reading his body's reactions. "Aw, come on. Make this at least a little fun for me," he drawled, not even breathing hard. A younger Cloud would've been miffed at the snub, and this older one wasn't completely immune to it either.

After the tiring exercise yesterday, and the unresolved resentment toward his sixteen-year-old body, Cloud wasn't feeling in top shape. He was frustrated, tired, a little hungry, and stressed. James smirked at Cloud as he purposefully upped the speed as the blond took the defense. Now feeling really annoyed, Cloud channeled what anger he could and broke from the repetitive kata and took a shot at the cadet's open right bicep. It connected with a smack that jerked the brown-haired boy a bit. This was the hesitation Cloud waited for and he snatched the offensive from him.

From here he maintained their original speed, but spiced up the fight. Cloud kept the kata as an outline, but alternately broke rhythm to deviate, frequently landing hits. He made sure to keep the general pattern, though in a normal fight that would be an amateur's move—a pattern was very predictable after all. But no matter where he hit James, or how quickly he moved to strike, the other cadet managed to keep up and blocked what he could, thinking fast on his feet. It became increasingly clear to Cloud that he wasn't as quick or capable as he thought. His flexibility was lacking, so he couldn't physically always connect his strikes, and his speed, which had once overwhelmed many enemies, wasn't enough to even beat a cadet.

The instructors blew the whistle and they broke apart. Both of them were breathing heavily, and the other boy was staring at Cloud with wide eyes. The blond ignored him though, consumed in self-deprecating thoughts. He had to take several deep breaths before he could unclench his fist from his pants. He shouldn't be angry. He needed to know where he was starting from, and he had that knowledge now. It was inevitable he would be far below what mentally felt like his level, but this _was_ his level now.

They took a break, and Cloud escaped from the crowd of his classmates with his water bottle, moving to an adjacent wall. As he took a drink, he noticed that one of the instructors had pulled Reno aside for some one-on-one, which had caught the other cadets' attentions.

Reno fought the way people in the slums do: like it was the last fight of their lives. It was unrefined, dirty, and clearly a jumble of different fighting styles all mixed together with poor technique, flashy moves, and a desperate kind of speed. Reno managed to frequently drive the instructors nuts with his complete lack of technique or respect for their carefully cultivated style. Of course, that had ended up saving his life time and time again when he could do the unexpected against traditionally trained opponents. But that was only appreciated in the Turks.

This time Reno was again reluctantly fixing the position of his feet and arms. He whined the entire time and constantly complained to the annoyed instructor. Fed up with the redhead, the man leaned over Reno's front leg, appearing to fix his opposite foot. Cloud's eyes just barely caught the quick movement of the Third using his mako-enhanced speed. One second Reno was looking down deviously at the crouched Third, then he was flat on his back. The SOLDIER had yanked his foot surreptitiously back, completely throwing off Reno's balance and sprawling him on the floor.

Everyone cheered the SOLDIER, who clearly looked triumphant at having finally put Reno in his place. The redhead got up rubbing his tailbone, but didn't seemed hurt otherwise. On the contrary he gave the Third a winning smile. He seemed a good sport about it, but Cloud saw him grimace as they were sent back into pairs.

When lunch rolled around Cloud was quite hungry, but the plate of slosh in front of him hardly tempted his appetite. Cadets weren't paid, so no one had enough money to buy food for every meal of the day in Midgar, and anyone who did wasn't about to join Shinra.

Classes resumed after lunch. Though Wednesday mornings were good fun, the afternoons were more mind-numbing lectures. Battle Strategy sounded like fun if it hadn't been just arrows on a whiteboard and recaps of Shinra's glorious victory against Wutai. Instead of actually focusing, Cloud put his mind to use in other fields. He knew the date, knew when Nibelheim happened, but he had no idea what else was happening at this point in the timeline. He hadn't seen Sephiroth and hadn't seen Zack since that brief moment in the hall, and Cloud could only recall bits and pieces of important events—and many of those he hadn't actually lived through, but were Zack's.

Which brought Cloud to his most frightening lapse in memory: when had he met Zack? This was particularly worrisome as Cloud wanted to have his friend back. Zack was also the best friend of Sephiroth, or as close as could be. Not to mention it was much harder to save Zack when he didn't know what was going on with the man. They hadn't met, Cloud was sure, until training with real swords started. The wooden swords had been used in the beginning of training, and when they started practicing with the metal ones, Cloud could remember Zack.

As for Sephiroth, Cloud hadn't really had any interaction with him until the Nibelheim mission, of that he was sure. Zack had never introduced them until that point. But Sephiroth… There was something inherently wrong about everything in that man's life, something Cloud almost felt obligated to fix, especially since he knew more about it than probably anyone but Hojo. He had never blamed Sephiroth after he'd lost his mind, never abandoned the loyalty that somewhere in him was the redeemable man Cloud had always envisioned.

Yes, the chase after mad Sephiroth had been partly for revenge over the destruction of his hometown. Yes, it had been to stop Jenova. But it had also been _for_ Sephiroth, not just saving the world and doing the right thing.

If he messed up again and failed he would be the broken-hearted kid who had his stuffed toy buried by the children in the snow again. He would be the little boy snubbed because his father left him a bastard again. He would be the teen unable to redeem himself after the bridge incident because everyone, even Tifa, would blame him again. He would be the man without his dream. Again.

But now Cloud could have more—more than he had let himself dream under the blankets as a little boy. The Planet never made things easy though, but he had _a chance_. The other boys were fast asleep as Cloud, inspired, slid off the bed and onto the floor of the barracks. Every drop of sweat in training was one less drop of blood in battle . Cloud put both hands flat on the floor and lifted his body up, positioning himself for press-ups. Sure, he couldn't do much now, but it would come with time.

He slept longer than the night before, though he still woke feeling trapped in a glass tube.


	4. A Chocobo Never Forgets

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cloud's first swordplay lesson turns him into a nervous mess when Zack shows up, and it doesn't get better from there.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> On FF.net this chapter is followed by "Chapter 5: Errant Errand". However, because of how brief that chapter was and for the flow, I combined it into this chapter, "A Chocobo Never Forgets". FF.net makes doing that a little harder, so if you see discrepancy in chapter numbers this is why. Chapter titles are still the same though.

Fifteen, sixteen…

Thursday opened up with a rather bleary sun peaking into the bunker from the small windows high up on one wall of the room. It was quiet as the boys slept in undisturbed peace, with only the sound of soft breathing. Cloud, who welcomed the quiet, was out of bed and on the floor, doing more push-ups before the others got up.

Twenty-three, twenty-four…

He had been at it all morning, ever since the sun yawned above the horizon, working his muscles until a light sheen of sweat had been built up. Push-ups were the last thing on his mental list. The day was only just starting for the rest of the cadets, but Cloud's had long since begun.

Thirty-one, thirty-two…

Dan sat up slowly and blinked away the last vestiges of sleep as Cloud finished up. The blond sat on the edge of his bed to take a breather, unconcerned if his bunkmate saw him or not. It might be out of character, but fitting in mattered a lot less to Cloud now then it did before.

Dan kept moving around on the top bunk, making the springs squeak. He had a weird habit of dressing under the covers; a baffling routine that he stoutly refused to explain, even as he managed to come out looking military appropriate. It had become a bunker mystery, and the butt of a number of jokes. It could not be denied, however, that nearly every boy in the barracks had tried this feat at least once. Mostly everyone reappeared from under the blankets looking rumpled with something on backwards and their hair full of static. Cloud had never been able to accomplish it either, though he wouldn't admit to trying it.

Dan fidgeted for a little while longer, then finally called down to Cloud, "Move your feet or I'll land in your lap."

Cloud sat more fully on his bed as Dan landed on the floor hard enough to make Cloud wince. Silence was a valuable commodity not just in SOLDIER but outside it too. It tended to make Cloud antsy when someone near him was being particularly loud. Yuffie may have been a near-deafening whiner, but as a ninja she had been the quietest of them all.

Cloud silently wondered how she was doing right now. She must be…ten years old or so.

"It's sword fighting today, isn't it?" Dan, normally so upbeat and enthusiastic to a sickening point, was maybe half that level on some mornings. He was a self-proclaimed mage and preferred long-range weaponry and battle to "all-up-in-your-face brawling", as he put it.

The rest of the boys shuffled about as the alarm went off, making Cloud wince at the screech before finally grunting when Dan kept waiting for an answer. He had been a closed-off sixteen-year old who'd been defensive and unfriendly out of chronic shyness and insecurity, now that he looked back on it. It didn't help that he wasn't physically as big as the other cadets and came from a backwater town. That was probably part of the reason why he'd been picked on—the other being that he had no allies. In Shinra, Cloud had been a lone man knocked off the field by a platoon of guys. Now he got the chance to be a one-man army. Or a least a one-man army with some back-up.

"You know, high MP comes from physical strength," Cloud said slowly. He wasn't very good at starting conversations, but at least he knew the one things Dan was interested in. The kid wasn't the brightest in the bunker or the most popular, but if Cloud kept skipping classes and needed alibis, Dan might not be bright but he'd be useful. "Strong fighters can channel magic in their weapon."

Dan perked up at the last bit. "You mean using materia differently? Not just explosions but like, flaming swords? I kinda wondered how General Sephiroth does that in the promotional vids!" Dan wasn't in the least bit suspicious, which was good.

Most weapons had materia slots that were used separately from the sword, but skilled fighters could channel the energy down the blade. Essentially, the blade could be covered in lightning or blast energy that could only be extinguished by will or an opponent with similar skills. It required a higher level of mastery over materia than most cared for and was generally a lot more destructive, which wasn't always useful.

"Yeah, they channel materia through their swords and can do magic blasts and…stuff." It was the most basic way of describing it. Having too much information would make it suspicious, especially since it was a high-level technique probably reserved for SOLDIER Firsts and maybe some Seconds.

Dan started to speculate about how it was done, and then who could possibly teach him to do it, and whether there was anyone in history he could look up—"Other than the General, of course," he amended with an admiring smile. The conversation, mostly one-sided with occasional grunting by Cloud who had said his piece, would have carried on to breakfast except the blond managed to slip away to the gym while Dan got his food.

Cloud was not only tired of the conversation already, but he was anxious to pick up a sword again. He sat in the gym waiting for the rest of the cadets to arrive because Shinra had smartly locked the weapons closet.

This gym was a bit brighter than the others, with a couple of larger windows facing the rising sun. It was the smallest weaponry-gym on the Shinra compound. Cloud had heard of how big the SOLDIER First Class one was. Apparently, they had their own separate place that was, according to rumor, huge and loaded with every kind of weapon imaginable. That might be an exaggeration, but if there was anyone Shinra lavished with a huge budget, it was the SOLDIER Firsts.

Cadets drifted in, talking quietly. The high roof was designed to muffle noise since the sound of clashing metal could grow to quite a din. Sword fighting was one of the favorite parts of training for Shinra cadets followed closely by guns. Sephiroth's influence in that area was apparent in the number of boys that wanted to take up the long broadsword. Not that there was anything close to Masamune in terms of length, but Masamune wasn't a normal blade.

More boys filtered in, and Cloud spotted Reno who quickly locked eyes with him and swaggered over. "Yo, skipping breakfast to keep your girlish figure? I heard the army's got worse rations then us, and they get paid too." He smirked down at the seated Cloud, but despite the words it wasn't really mocking. Reno's posture was slack and comfortable, no hard lines that gave away any preparation for an attack. Cid was the same way. If he insulted someone, he would tense a bit, just in case they swung at him. If he spoke normally however, he slouched and relaxed. Reno, for some reason, seemed to be almost been making conversation with him.

The blond stared at Reno, and the redhead met his eyes steadfastly. If Reno was trying to pull anything he was an excellent liar, but Cloud had already known that. They finally the stare broke when someone called Reno over. Cloud looked back into the gym, clearly telling Reno that he didn't want anything to do with him. Whatever his game was, Cloud had a lot bigger things on his plate.

Reno might have said something, but it was lost in the shouting as their instructor came in and starting giving them orders. First sprints, then basic stretching, then one of the three main katas to get everybody started.

His group of cadets had not yet started practicing with actual swords. In the first six months following recruitment day in the fall cadets practiced only with wooden swords. It was late summer now, and they had switched to cheap metal swords that were as liable to chip as they were to shatter. These ones barely mimicked the weight and feel of a real sword. Cloud couldn't suppress his disappointment when the instructors pulled out the telltale box.

The swords were handed out down the line, and each boy complained about his, all generally sharing the same criticism: they weren't real. Cloud's sword was nicked in some places and scratched all over with a nearly square end that had clearly been slammed straight down into the solid steel floor many times before. It was lighter and smaller than a broadsword and felt odd in Cloud's hand, as if it had no place being there, and was uncomfortable to work with as he swung it around a couple of times. The balance was totally off, and he could probably break it in half if he put enough force behind it. First Tsurugi was a heavy six-piece work of art that molded to Cloud's hand and individual style. In his opinion this cheap cutout couldn't even be called a sword.

The instructors ignored the muttering and grumbling they got every time and split everyone into pairs. Cloud sized up his partner who was only a bit taller than him but stockier. His name was Devin, and while Cloud wasn't sure of anything else, he knew the boy wasn't in his bunker. The extra weight Devon had would give him momentum and strength, but his agility would likely be lacking in comparison to Cloud's. They began by just mimicking the katas, one person blocking and the other attacking.

Cloud was careful to analyze how his body moved as they slowly started parrying, blocking, and swinging at each other. His younger muscles were unfamiliar with the moves, but the natural feeling and his own confidence in it smoothed it out into one flow. Even if the sword was a fake, the opposition not a real challenge, and he was in a controlled environment, there was still a thrill to fighting, something he had already begun to miss. Going days without it made the first couple of his swings and parries near blissful. This was a dance Cloud knew by heart.

They'd barely gotten going before the door to the gym opened and everyone turned to see the latecomer. When Cloud's eyes locked on him the sword in his hand went lax and his stomach turned over with a lurch.

Zack moseyed into the room like he was on a coffee break, which he might actually be, completely unbothered by the number of eyes on him. No matter how oblivious he seemed, Cloud knew Zack was perfectly aware of the whole room. Zack Fair was a First Class SOLDIER, and Lieutenant General at that, and he didn't miss much.

He came into the cadet sword class with his usual charm, smiling at everyone and greeting the instructor who looked like he wasn't sure if he should be admiring or peeved by the interruption. A murmur rippled through the room as the First positioned himself near a sparring pair who had frozen when he walked in. They resumed when he gestured for them to continue, though both were noticeable tenser. It didn't take long for Zack to switch to teacher-mode, pushing a foot out to correct someone's position and taking the weapon from one to demonstrate as they worked.

The blond felt like a bowstring ready to pop; he was positively thrumming with adrenaline and nerves. He hadn't felt this way since the last time he'd put his life at serious risk with a Midgar Zolom, and it was overall a pleasant, almost missed sensation, even as he felt like if he got drawn any tighter he'd throw up.

Gradually the other cadets returned to their practice, the original instructor barking at those who didn't. Like everyone, Cloud's eyes continued to return the SOLDIER across the room, and he couldn't focus on the exercise. With all his attention centered on Zack, he didn't realize an older, more instinctive part of himself slid to the forefront of his mind.

His eyes darted between his partner's blade and how Zack's calloused hands slid another's grip to the proper position. He and Devin restarted their match, and this time Cloud's arm moved on autopilot. They had been at an easy stalemate for ten minutes before Cloud began to unconsciously press his advantage. He was only minimally aware that he was taking steps forward and walking Devin off the mat. More often than not his eyes drifted back over to Zack as the SOLDIER made rounds around the room.

Zack came to a pair just twenty feet away and behind Devin, and the blond's attention on his partner was pretty much gone. He was so focused on Zack that Cloud jerked when he realized his partner had put down his weapon. As Cloud finally looked at him properly, he realized Devin was sweating and breathing hard and asking something about switching roles. The blond gave him an apologetic nod, barely noticing his own perspiration as Zack drifted a little closer, smiling and giving a thumbs up to the cadet who did something right.

They started up again, but Cloud's focus wavered to the SOLDIER again, even turning his head slightly when the First moved off to the side. He wasn't really paying any attention to Devin, but still managing to keep up. He didn't notice the deepening frown on Devin's face, or he would have been prepared when Devin got fed up with Cloud's distraction. The other cadet was determined not to let a First Class SOLDIER see him made a fool of.

Devin forwent the kata and swung his dented blade at Cloud's open left shoulder. His strike would have connected but moment's before it landed the blond's eyes snapped to him and his sword flipped suddenly to knock away Devin's strike. It happened faster than the cadet could see, and Devin didn't even register the move until his hand was vibrate from the strike.

"Nice one. Quick too."

Recognizing the voice instantly, Cloud lowered his sword quickly and looked away from the First Class. He was shaking a bit as he tightened his grip on the sword to try and get better control of himself. He felt an irrational self-consciousness around Zack, and Cloud could feel his posture and entire being were radiating that.

"Um…thanks." Cloud muttered it almost under his breath, afraid that even his own words would make the beautiful image of a smiling Zack disappear forever. How long had it been since he had seen Zack this clearly? Not since his Geostigma had been cured, and that had been the one time in years. Ever since then, Zack's smile had begun to fade as Cloud's spotty memory took its toll. The blond could feel a deep ache in him as Zack stopped smiling for a moment to lightly admonish Devin for making that move.

"No matter how clever you're supposed to stick to the kata—those patterns have to be ingrained in your muscles before you can do anything fancy." Zack smiled brightly at a down-looking Devin and winked conspiratorially at Cloud. "Don't worry though. As you get more advanced breaking pattern is what it's all about." At this comment, he was looking at Cloud. "Now let's see you two again, eh?"

Cloud and Devin took up position back on their mat. Cloud's blade shook like a light wind was running through it. He was a mess as they started up again, this time Cloud taking the defensive side. Zack's experienced eye followed the movements of the swords, and Cloud could almost feel the roving eyes on his skin. Devin looked determined as he fought, clearly trying to show off by besting Cloud, though he too had a white-knuckled grip on his sword.

Devin must have been a rather poor swordsman even by cadet standards because a very clumsy and distracted Cloud still managed to fend him off. The sweat pouring down Cloud's face was partially from exertion and mostly from the feel of Zack's eyes following his every movement.

"Break."

Zack put his hand up and caught the blades easily as they crossed. Both boys relaxed immediately and stepped back. "Don't let go of your weapon. If I were an enemy that surprised you, I'd have two weapons and you'd have none. Now," at this, Zack looked Devin over once then more critically looked at Cloud. "You both look good, just need some new moves and experience. If you don't mind Spike, bring your sword and come over here."

Zack returned the fake swords and led Cloud away. Cloud felt a cold pit fall in his stomach and a giddy flutter in his heart simultaneously. He didn't know what to feel as he trailed after the First, who collected a cheap sword from the box..

Zack led them off to the side of the gym. Maxwell and Reno were going at it a little ways away from them. They'd long abandoned the kata and had resorted to all manner of cheap and ridiculous moves to one-up each other. It was an interesting but totally unrefined battle, and several cadets were poorly pretending to spar while actually watching them go at it. Cloud's gaze skimmed right over them. Zack was standing two feet away from him and the man's glowing eyes were watching him.

"Pick up your sword and take up a ready stance." Cloud did as ordered, falling into a basic fighting stance. "Good, now prepare yourself."

Zack came at him with some easy moves at first, testing the waters of Cloud's ability. Cloud, still shaking and his stomach doing wobbly-woops in his throat, felt a little unwell and dizzy as some of the familiar swings Zack did mirrored his own. A particularly strong wave of vertigo made Cloud sway precariously mid-block. Zack put down his own sword and caught Cloud's arm to steady him.

"You alright Spike?" Cloud nodded and leaned forward into Zack a bit as the wooziness passed. Zack was warm, not breathing hard at all, and he smelled faintly of his familiar soap Cloud had liked so much. The feel of Zack's hand gripping his arm was hot. "Whoa! Be careful." Zack pushed Cloud back into a full standing position, righting him. The blond stumbled a bit and resumed his defensive stance. There was a full-blown blush on his face, and he realized how stupid he was to practically dig his nose into Zack's shirt.

"Watch your step blond, you look a little weak." Maxwell was an unhappily familiar face in Cloud's world, with orange-blond hair and biceps as thick as Cloud's neck. He had been one of the guys who failed the exam and ended up bullying Cloud in the regulation army for being there with him. Now, soaked in sweat, he had lumbered over to watch Cloud look stupid fighting a First Class SOLDIER. Reno stood off to the side and a little behind, somewhere between an eavesdropper and bystander.

"Hey! Totally unnecessary," Zack said, as much to Cloud's surprise as Maxwell's. "Spike might be your teammate in SOLDIER—if you make it—and you better get along now." Zack's spiky hair combined with his puffed up chest made him look more like a porcupine than usual as he defended Cloud. Embarrassed, Cloud looked away at the SOLDIER comment. Reno stayed silent but his eyebrows shot up, and Maxwell looked like he'd swallowed a frog.

Zack turned back to Cloud and raised his sword again. He was smiling at him, and Cloud felt much younger and lighter than before. It put an answering upturn to Cloud's lips, and that made Zack's smile a little wider and warmer. "Let's try that again, eh?"

So the pair started again. Cloud was still feeling unsteady and a little overwhelmed by Zack's concentrated interest on him. It was like an overdose, and the blond felt like all his actions were a little sluggish and messy because of it. He took a hard smack to the side with the flat of Zack's blade for his disorientation.

"Sorry Spike, didn't mean to hit you so hard. You okay? You look kinda glassy-eyed." Zack was leaning curiously closer to Cloud. Startled, Cloud took an abrupt step back. The sudden looming face that turned into a blinding white grin made him stumble back even further. The blond's recovery was a bit slow, but Zack just laughed as he straightened. "You look like a ruffled chocobo, you know that?"

Cloud stood up a bit taller, unconsciously feeling miffed at the description. He didn't manage a word though because the morning session ended a moment later. The First dashed off almost as soon as they bell began to ring; probably realizing his coffee break had stretched to over an hour. Cloud was left standing there trying to sort through a flood of emotion and maintain some normality.

The high from his contact with Zack plummeted by lunch, and Cloud started to feel downcast as he digested exactly how far he had to go. Being singled out by Zack was great—realizing how massive the chasm between them wasn't. Cloud also didn't feel like he'd left much of an impression at all, except that he was a floundering fanboy, which made him scowl at the wall.

* * *

"…So I defended the kid, you know. I knew he was kinda getting picked on, especially since he acts standoffish because he's shy. I wonder if that's why he's been overlooked? I mean, I saw him walk his partner right off the mat and it didn't even look like he was trying! And he was shaky when I shared a few blows with him, but he seemed to know what he was doing just fine. I bet he practices the katas all the time to get them that smooth—just no one's noticed 'til now."

"Zackary, get your feet off my desk."

"Right. Sorry General."

Zack was seated on the only spare chair in Sephiroth's office. The immaculate room was painted in shades of office-gray and white with a plain carpet and blank walls. The large desk was stacked high with folders with a computer peeking out from behind them. There was a bookshelf of untouched books located beside one massive window behind the desk letting the late sun shine in. The General was the centerpiece, effortlessly drawing all the attention in the room. His silver hair shone almost white as the sun hit it, left hanging loose until it touched the floor. His coat and sword were placed against the adjacent wall, and the General had rolled up the sleeves of his loose collar shirt. Sephiroth's aristocratic face rested in one ungloved hand as he attempted to do paperwork.

He looked bored out of his mind.

Zack had commandeered the chair the moment he came back from a much-extended copying trip, where he never actually copied the documents Sephiroth had given him. The General was in the middle of paperwork and would have been happy to chastise Zack for not doing his job, but the First had launched into his story about the blond cadet the moment he was in the room before Sephiroth could say a word. The General barely seemed to pay attention, but the man's progress in his paperwork was considerably slower than if he were normally tuning Zack out.

"Anyway, he didn't do anything amazing, not like a prodigy or anything. He just… knew what he was doing. Which is funny because he looked scared stiff when I pulled him aside. Obviously he was nervous, but he still fought pretty well, and didn't leave any holes in that crappy kata. He had the whole thing covered, you know, turning his hand the right way to move the sword faster to cover the flank, shifting his weight, the works. They don't teach how to read between the lines of kata like that to cadets."

Sephiroth looked up at Zack's repeated exclamation, straight into the Lieutenant General's eyes, and the First froze for a second. Sephiroth was listening—really listening, by the way he was looking at him. And he was interested, if this near-brazen act for the General meant what Zack thought.

"No openings?"

"None. They don't teach you how to look for that stuff 'til you work with the real swords, and even then it takes a sharp mind to do it in practice. I didn't pick up on that until well into my first year as a Third." Zack broke from his frozen surprise to happily confirm it. It wasn't often cadets did anything remotely interesting that didn't involve punishments and expulsions. "He was really doing it, and he didn't have any trouble stepping up when I changed things up. He was a bit awkward and stumbled some of the moves, but he had the right idea."

Sephiroth, still listening, abandoned his paperwork for his computer. He pulled up the cadet files as Zack kept up the commentary. "What was his name?"

"Cloud Strife. Weird name, huh?"

"Hm." Sephiroth didn't answer as he searched the name and came up with a picture of a blond boy, hair all over the place. He was fair-skinned and rather short, according to his basic profile, and from some tiny town. His bright blue eyes and hair dominated his picture and his face was set in a stubborn glare at the camera in a picture of teenage rebellion. He was young and nothing about his basic profile seemed deceptive. The General clicked past the photo after a pause and skimmed over the grades: all average, and with physical abilities just below average. Nothing jumped out at him.

"Anything?" Zack discreetly tried to put his feet back on the desk as Sephiroth clicked around Cloud's profile. As the second booted foot got to the top of the desk the General looked at him, eyes not even flickering to the boots on his desk.

"Nothing of interest." He looked a bit puzzled for a second, just barely. Zack just grinned.

"Well then, I suppose I'll just have to figure out Spike for myself. I'll find him later."

Sephiroth didn't say anything, but flagged the profile. He made a pointed look at Zack, silently dismissing him from the room. Zack, unperturbed, saluted his General with a huge smile and left the office.

Sephiroth rubbed his temples and took one more glance at Cloud's profile. Then he closed the window and glared at the obvious scuff left by Zack's boot on the edge of one of his papers.

* * *

Dinner was Cloud's first meal of the day, and his stomach rumbled as he chewed on the tough meat even though he had no appetite for it. He sat alone at one corner of the canteen, his back to the lunch line. It was hard to be inconspicuous with his hair and he'd long given up trying, so Zack's sharp eyes found him almost instantly.

The SOLDIER approached the table where Cloud sat, taking his time to weave through the tables to wave to a couple Thirds he recognized. Still ten feet away, the blond turned around to look at him. For a moment, Zack could hear nothing of the chattering and clanking of the lunchroom occupants as he realized Cloud had glanced at him with an open expression of pleasure, something that seemed out of place on the stonier face he'd seen just that morning. For just one second, something deep inside that guarded face had come alive, and Zack felt a great welling of sympathy all of a sudden. Where it came from, what caused Cloud to be so closed off that he sat alone at a big meal like dinner, Zack had no idea, but it came nevertheless.

Just as swiftly Cloud's face morphed back to his stoic one; the face that made Zack feel sad, but not with the same intensity as before. There was an edge of defensiveness in that look that had to have been bred from years of abuse—bullies most likely, if not something more sinister back home. That was what made him feel sad, he figured, this need of the blond's to protect himself indiscriminately. So the SOLDIER put on his best smile for Cloud, trying to be disarming and fun. "Hey Spike!"

Cloud didn't have the faintest idea what Zack was doing here, and his ominiously rumbling stomach kicked into butterflies. He refused to feel any excitement that Zack was here especially to see him, enough to even pull him out of a meal. It could mean any number of things, good or bad. Maybe… maybe he had given himself away?

Zack was looking at him a bit funny now. "Uh… Spike? You there?"

Startled, Cloud sat up a bit straighter. He hadn't realized he hadn't answered Zack's hello. "Um…"

"It's alright. Let's head back to the barracks if you're done. It's loud in here."

Cloud shrugged, failing to hide how tense he was. Feeling incredibly uptight Cloud stiffly threw out his unfinished meal and followed the First out of the cafeteria, ignoring the surge in whispers around them.

He put his head down as the passed into the corridor, making sure not to look at Zack as the First slowed so they could walk next to each other. Cloud's shoulders were tight as Zack looked down at him. The blond really wasn't all that tall and didn't have a lot of muscle on him yet. He was sixteen years old by his profile though, so he had a ways to grow yet.

Zack also noted Cloud's mood and how hunched down he looked. Being singled-out by a First Class SOLDIER was something every cadet wished would happen to him, which is partially why Zack had caught him in the cafeteria. The SOLDIER hoped whatever bullies there were would back off if they thought Zack was interested in him, and then Cloud could be a little more confident in himself. Which is why Zack would have thought Cloud would be thrilled and nervous at once, not brooding and almost afraid.

They reached the cadet barracks and Cloud stepped in first, holding the door for Zack. Nothing had been said on the way there as they both weighed what to say, and Zack stretched as he indicated for Cloud to sit down. His quick glance around the room confirmed the generic cadet bunker, with all sorts of clothing and personal items strewn about, lewd pictures on the walls, and the lingering smell of dirty laundry, feet, and unwashed bodies. The blond perched himself on the edge of his bed in a corner, looking ready to jump if Zack attacked. The SOLDIER instantly noticed how much neater his bed was, with the sheets pulled up and folded down, though not tucked in. He could see the end of a box under the bed, but otherwise there seemed little in the way of personal possessions, which Zack found rather interesting.

He could only stretch for so long, so Zack flopped down next to Cloud, both on the edge of the blond's bunk, resting their arms on their knees. "Relax Spike. I'm not going to bite you." Zack judged Cloud's face, which was tightly drawn. Cloud looked ready for anything, but mostly ready to be told he was being kicked out. "I hated these beds. They're the worst, I'm telling you. Third Class share rooms with four people, and that stuff is way better than this." Zack rambled on a bit about the beds and general Shinra accommodations and kept up his friendly tone. It did the trick as Cloud ran a hand through his hair, unconsciously relaxing a little as Zack did nothing to attack him. "Well, I bet your home is a lot better than anything Shinra can offer."

Cloud looked a bit wary at the suggestion to speak. "…I guess so. It was colder there though."

"Where'd you live?" Zack already knew courtesy of Cloud's profile, but he didn't want to creep out the blond.

"Nibelheim. Up in the Nibel Mountains on the Western Continent."

"You must have been freezing! Mountains, sheesh. Gongaga's all tropical and hot. Humid, humid, humid." Zack groaned good-naturedly. "I miss that spicy food but man do I not miss having to pick the fruit. There were these monkey beasts that made their nests in the big trees, and they could wallop a grown man—seriously. The town used to hire mercenaries to kill them, but only in groups of five or more, that's how dangerous those things were."

Zack peaked over at Cloud, trying to read him. He still wasn't as relaxed as he would like, but maybe that was just Zack's rank and title. As much as he loved being a First Class for the privileges and strength, it did make connecting with people harder. "They weren't the only dangerous beasts around, but I guess every area's got them. Don't dragons live in the Nibel Mountains? I don't think I've ever been deep enough out there to run into anything like that, though I'd love to take a swing at a dragon. Ever seen one?" he asked nonchalantly.

Cloud had only rarely fought the dragons with AVALANCHE, they being few in number and very hardy. They were ferocious beasts and not usually worth the effort simply because they were so difficult to kill, and he certainly never fought them before coming to Shinra. Zack's relaxed attitude about it was almost…faked. His shoulders were too loose, body too long as he leaned back, casually looking around the room. Everything about him screamed relaxed.

"No. They were a lot deeper in the mountains."

"Really? Then maybe you've fought some of the other monsters? I know a lot of those areas are just crawling, and being near a reactor doesn't help. Gongaga was by one too." Cloud just shook his head, and Zack looked even more curious. "See Spike, it's just… I thought you might have some experience in swordplay. Or at least done some fighting before, just stuff you pick up." Zack scooted a bit closer to Cloud on the bed and hunched over slightly to avoid bumping his head on the top bunk. Like Cloud the spikes of his hair folded over because there wasn't enough space. "When we sparred it seemed like you knew what you were doing in general. Like it was familiar to you."

Cloud was looking down at the bed as he swallowed before speaking. "Not really."

"Really?" Zack's disbelief was evident. Cloud seemed to have a talent for short answers, not unlike someone else Zack knew.

"I just did what came naturally." Cloud mumbled and shrugged, turning away slightly. The words had come out too fast and too softly. Zack's gaze was probably making him nervous, so he tried to give the blond some space. Maybe he was just talented or had a knack for swordplay. There'd be no reason to lie about a little training after all, but something about the blond's coiled shoulders and the way he answered was setting off warning bells to Zack. Maybe the training hadn't been legal, or with a criminal, or something else?

Cloud didn't know why he felt fear clamoring at his throat at the thought of telling Zack any semblance of the truth. He could tell Zack everything right now, even if they were practically strangers. But the moment he thought it he felt repulsed at the idea. Who knew what Zack would think if Cloud told him anything? Insane? Dangerous? Or worse, what if he tried to help and got caught in the crossfire?

His lips pinched at the thought. Zack would definitely do that. And the things Cloud would have to do… he didn't know how close Zack and Sephiroth were now, but the First might not like what he heard about the General. And then he'd be even _more_ likely to get involved.

Zack meanwhile mused on how to angle this conversation— _not_ an interrogation, he reminded himself firmly—for a couple of seconds. Direct questions weren't working, and Zack figured Cloud would get defensive if he pushed him too hard. He had to come at it another way.

"Well, if you haven't fought before then you should at least go for the sword. You've really got talent with that." Cloud paused before answering, seeming to fall for the change in subject. It was clear that he already felt better that Zack looked to be buying his story. The First decided to play along for the moment, but sometime later he would get the full story out of the blond. When they knew each other a little better, he hoped Cloud would confide in him.

"I do want to use the sword," he admitted tentatively.

"Then go for it! I use one, mine's called Galatine, and she's beautiful. She's a buster sword and one-of-a-kind. Just gorgeous." Cloud soaked it in as Zack described his sword and some of the fancier moves he'd done with it. He really got into it, and Cloud was secretly pleased that he wasn't the only one who adored his sword like a lover. "Buster swords are awesome, Cloud. They're intimidating for one, so half the time you just have to stand there 'til people's knees start to buckle, and they really kick ass in a fight. You should try one once you're a SOLDIER—they're a little too heavy for the un-enhanced. Masamune is probably the hardest thing to wield besides the buster though. Six-feet of killing machine, Spike! I don't know how the General does it."

Cloud was startled out of his own reverie about the very same buster sword Zack was describing at the mention of Sephiroth. The First was staring off into space, languishing love on his sword as he compared Masamune and Galatine, with blatant bias on Galatine's part. He misread Cloud's interest in Masamune though, and it got a little ugly.

"I was mostly in Midgar for the Wutai War, but when they sent Sephiroth out there that was pretty much the end of it." Zack paused to remember it, but Cloud felt his scrutinizing gaze on him nonetheless. "During Wutai that sword had about fifty names—all bad things too. Scared the people real bad. During fighting, it was terrible. Stuff I hope you never have to see, Cloud." Cloud would have snorted if he thought Zack wouldn't have noticed. "Sephiroth's more of a slasher than a stabber, if you know what I mean. He'll cut a fiend to ribbons. Of course, Masamune's got a sharp point like most swords, and it's long enough to run though a couple of men."

Cloud's face lost any humor with those last words, and he unconsciously rubbed his left shoulder. The selfsame sword Zack was going on about had run through Cloud multiple times actually. It put a serious damper on the conversation.

"I'm sure Sephiroth would like to run it through a couple of men now and then." Zack kept on going, oblivious or at least acting it, to the drop in Cloud's mood. "He's got a reputation of course for his bite," he added jokingly, "but to be honest the guy is a workaholic. I'm constantly dragging him out from behind his desk."

Zack had effortlessly moved subjects again, and this one had really caught Cloud's attention. He'd been shifting through subjects to see Cloud's reaction, a technique he'd learned from a friend when trying to read someone. Cloud was definitely a sword-lover and not eager for war, and he studiously avoided talk of his hometown. Sephiroth was another easy topic because everyone liked to gossip about him and every kid with a stick had pretended to be him at some point or another.

"I thought the General would be with the troops more," Cloud ventured when Zack hummed and pretended to be imagining some time when he'd successfully pulled Sephiroth from his desk.

"Someone's gotta decide where they all go, and that means paperwork. Trust me, if he could spent his whole time in a training salle he would." Zack turned a bit to look at Cloud, wondering if the blond was more interested in the General as a fighter or… something else. "Not that most people want to fight him in a simulation anyway—he beats up Firsts to work off stress."

Cloud actually did go a little red, just the barest hint of his ears, and Zack held back a grin. Something else then.

"Hot chocolate helps me when nothing else does," Cloud offered quietly. It was true too. Sometimes no amount of killing beasts, fast driving, and daredevil tricks could quiet the nightmares and pain. Hot chocolate or hot cider brought him back to his childhood, when he wasn't exactly carefree but… things were easier then.

"Hot chocolate huh," Zack said speculatively, seeing the blush go just a little deeper as Cloud stared at the bunk opposite them. Not exactly the response Zack had been expecting, but one he infinitely preferred.

So the First kept up his talk about the General with Cloud for a little while more. It had been a new version of the same chat for Zack, who was closer to the General than most. Many lower ranked soldiers often asked what it was like, where Sephiroth lived and his habits, was he single, or how to contact him, and Zack hated to feed their starved, twisted adoration.

Cloud never asked for anything of the sort, in fact, he seemed happier just hearing about how Zack had tricked the mighty General into eating rare Wutain mussels and gave him his first (and only) experience with food poisoning. Cloud seemed to appreciate the human side of Sephiroth and now the hero, and when Zack strayed back to Masamune he could actually see Cloud's flagging interest.

Not that Zack would have expected it of someone as shy as Cloud, but the blond got points for not asking about the man's sexual escapades, which usually put Zack in a bad mood for the rest of the day. Cloud also didn't ask for any of his favorite foods, flowers, or other silly things. Zack only humored those questions because he liked chocolate and Sephiroth could be rather inventive in how to get rid of flowers or other gifts. This went above and beyond burning them. They could end up in cafeteria food, official reports to the President, in the Turks' personal apartments, and on Hojo's desk.

The only thing that broke up the peace and comfort of their conversation were the voices outside the door. Dinner was over and many cadets were coming back to relax. Zack stood up and stretched, surprised at how nice that conversation had been and just how little he had gotten out of Cloud. They'd talked about the General most of the time, and more told all the stories with Cloud adding in rare commentary as he relaxed. Zack decided, in that moment, that to get more information would obviously mean more drastic measures. Clearly his love of talk had gotten around and he'd been played.

"Spike, this morning I never got around to copying all the stuff the General dumped on me. If you help me carry it when I make those copies now, I'll get you some good Wutain for dinner tomorrow."

Cloud looked really surprised there. It made him look his own age, which shocked Zack a bit too once he realized it. The SOLDIER had felt like he was speaking to a fellow SOLDIER, not a barely legal cadet.

"As long as you don't get me seafood."

Zack grinned, practically lighting up the room. "Excellent! Then let's go, Spike. Copy room is in the main headquarters, so let's mosey!"

* * *

The copy room turned out to be the busiest place Cloud had ever been to. It the busyness of the seven blocks of the Midgar marketplace condensed into one room with a more than dozen huge machines taking up half the space. Graphs and charts of all colors for finance and business were strewn about while harassed employees were digging through the piles to find the own papers. There was no order to the lines at the copy machines. Whoever pushed and shoved their way to the front and slammed their papers on the screen first won. Interns stood gaping, knees knocking, on the fringes of the room. It was utter chaos.

Cloud moved a bit closer to Zack, feeling a little overwhelmed.

Zack though was perfectly calm as he shoved his way through the hectic secretaries. Cloud followed behind him, staying close. He was perfectly fine in just about any battle situation, but he didn't know the first thing about offices. It took a shorter amount of time than Cloud expected to navigate the bedlam. Zack flashed some female secretaries a couple of flirty smiles, discreetly nudging people who didn't move fast enough, joked with a janitor who was cleaning up an ink spill, and got his fifty packets and reports copied in about fifteen minutes. This charisma and charm was a part of Zack Cloud secretly wished he had a little more of.

They wove their way out of the mess again, Cloud now burdened with a stack of files, each at least ten pages thick, topped with a couple of manila folders stamped with official seals. Cloud's eyes could just barely see over the top, though it wobbled precariously if he walked too quickly or someone jarred him. Zack had two packets under one arm and was leading Cloud cautiously forward, covering him from the worst of the crush. They finally exited into the windowless hallway, Cloud's ears ringing as the thick carpeting absorbed the sound of their boots clunking along.

"Is it always like that?" Cloud asked after he felt he could hear again. How Zack managed it over the sound of those freakishly loud machines with his enhanced hearing Cloud didn't know.

"Pretty much," Zack said. "It's worse during the day though. This is the beginning of the night shift though, that's why it's so busy."

The hallway ended at three elevators, including the glass elevator that went to the highest floors. Through the glass elevator the rest of Shinra continued to run efficiently. Cloud could see the people on the first floor dotted all over the place running around like ants. The roof in the entrance hall was impressive, rising up like a shiny dome with a focal point of a solid gold chandelier.

The three elevators didn't have access to the labs, as Cloud already knew, watching the numbers tick down of the leftmost elevator. Getting down there required a more discreet entrance tucked away from curious eyes. The labs habitually suffered blackouts when electricity was rerouted for experiments, leaving them with lighting straight out of a horror movie sometimes. The numbers started at U1, then U2 and on down underground. As the levels got lower, higher access codes and stricter security kept lips sealed tight. Cloud couldn't help but think of the people who could be suffering somewhere stories below his boots. His stomach heaved a bit at the thought, and Zack's sunshiny presence almost dimmed in Cloud's mind.

Zack brightened back into existence quickly though as he nudged Cloud back to reality. The First figured Cloud seemed all right, a little morose, though it may have just been the fact that Zack couldn't see most of Cloud's face behind the packets.

The elevator dinged, and Zack turned expectantly towards the doors, though they didn't open. He turned to Cloud to shrug, but the blond was looking towards the glass elevator. Passing their floor in the transparent machine was a burly man with a dark, shiny baldhead. His hands were locked behind his back, and he stared straightforward through a pair of dark-tinted sunglasses. He was impeccable in appearance, but menacing all the same.

"He's a Turk," Zack murmured in explanation, flicking a glance at Cloud. "Just watch out, okay? He's pretty noticeable, but some of the others blend in well, so watch your step." Rude's dark skin tone was an uncommon feature, and many people tended to stare. It was the same with many of Wutain descent in some areas of the world.

Once Rude was gone, Zack started idly bouncing on the balls of his feet, clearly impatient for their elevator to come. Cloud watched him for a moment, strongly reminded of a bored eight-year old, before he shifted the weight of the papers a bit.

Zack looked back over at him and shrugged. "I bet some intern on the first floor hit every damn button on the way up here." He nudged Cloud a bit and laughed. "Kid probably had no idea where he's going, so he's just checking every name tag on each floor." Zack smiled again, enjoying his jibe before turning back to the elevator expectantly, as though the doors might open to his will.

Cloud looked on for a second, suddenly feeling the urge to keep up the conversation. "Where are we going?"

Zack turned back towards Cloud and couldn't help but chuckle. Cloud was all hair and two big blue eyes behind the stack of papers. He blinked up at Zack once, his head tilted just barely to the side looking innocently curious.

Zack winked at him.

Cloud frowned back though Zack couldn't see it. Zack's playful gesture instead of an answer annoyed the blond a bit, since he hated to go into any situation blind. At the same time, Cloud's heart felt a little warm that Zack was so laidback with him the way they used to be.

Their elevator arrived finally, and they stepped into it. The lighting slipped between the cracks from floor to wall and at the corners of the room. It made for weird shadows that wavered and danced in front of them. The whole machine grumbled and groaned, and gave a mildly frightening shudder as it passed the twenty-third floor. Zack leaned back against the wall and smiled mysteriously at the blond, who was watching the numbers rise higher and higher.

"You don't know Shinra well enough to guess who's on what floor," Zack informed Cloud smugly.

Cloud shrugged in response. He knew generally who was where, or at least what rank the people were, though as a cadet he shouldn't have. However, the more floors that passed them by, the more nervous Cloud became. Wherever they were going, it was to an important somebody's office.

The elevator kept rising and Cloud had a sudden realization of their most likely destination. Zack was, though Cloud had forgotten, the Lieutenant General of SOLDIER. It was the second most powerful position in SOLDIER and guaranteed Zack an office on a high floor.

Cloud exhaled and his relief was almost palpable. The blond would never say it out loud to Zack, but he'd been worried they were going to Sephiroth's office. Cloud peaked at Zack from the corner of his eye, but the man's wickedly mischievous smile just wouldn't go away. His mako-brightened eyes glittered at his inside joke and flashed over to Cloud's. The blond huffed a little for Zack's benefit, and the SOLDIER just laughed.

The elevator finally stopped on Floor 45. They stepped out, Cloud rather carefully as his stack wavered a bit, and into the muted stillness of a large, open seating area with a couple couches and a coffee table with a vase on it. It had about as much personality as a hotel room. As Cloud stepped out he noticed the carpet was quite thick, and around the square lounge were four evenly spaced doors and one directly opposite the elevators at the far side. Each had a plaque nailed to it announcing the office and name of the occupier.

Zack led Cloud around the couches and the blond strained to read unfamiliar names off the shiny plates. These offices were all for the Lieutenant Generals, but the two on the left side were for the regulation army. The one on the right must have been Zack's, and the fourth room likely a break room or maybe even a secretary's. Being considerably larger in size than SOLDIER, the regulation army had two Lieutenant Generals while Zack was the only one for SOLDIER.

Zack kept going past the door with his name and rank on it and instead went to the farthest door in the room. The well of dread that had been steadily growing in Cloud's stomach suddenly turned into a lead weight when the SOLDIER stopped.

**General**

Cloud was noticeably tense, and Zack was again distinctly reminded of a startled chocobo at the way Cloud's shoulders stiffened. He seemed to shrink behind the papers, and Zack almost felt the need to look over the top of the copies and make sure the blond was still there.

Zack of course knew what Cloud had noticed, and the First's playful mood started to evaporate when Cloud's reaction was obviously moving away from "startled" and into "panicky" territory. The SOLDIER had been enjoying keeping the secret of their destination from Cloud, but now he wondered if that had been such a good idea. The blond looked like he was thinking of making a run for it.

"Relax Cloud, the man doesn't bite. You can't leave me to carry all those papers by myself, now can you?" Zack's lame attempt at loosening the atmosphere fell flat, as Cloud didn't so much as twitch, his eyes darting to the other doors for a just a brief moment. The SOLDIER frowned at the blond, though Cloud didn't seem to notice. Zack had been hoping Cloud would be a bit tougher than this, but apparently the thought of meeting Sephiroth thoroughly intimidated him. Maybe it was too early, given he'd only approached him today, but Cloud had really caught his eye, and Zack had thought the kid could take the surprise.

Zack had dragged other messengers into the General's office before and they'd all been trembling messes or bracing themselves for the worst. Zack found it rather funny for strangers or cadets and Thirds that annoyed him, but with Cloud it just felt mean to make Cloud so uncomfortable. Zack had already justified this impromptu meeting though. Cloud had been really interested in Sephiroth, and Zack thought he might open up more if he thought he'd have a boost to get into SOLDIER after meeting a mildly interested Sephiroth.

The blond looked more like he was going to an execution though. Did he really think he was doing poorly enough to be kicked out of the program?

Cloud, dazed, was wondering how to convince Zack to go to Sephiroth's office alone. The shock seemed to break over Cloud when no one dragged him forcibly through the door as he stood there like a frozen deer. Zack's eyes were on him, he could feel it, and the blond knew already that retreat wasn't an option. It was better to fight this battle now, even if he was totally unprepared for it.

His steps were carefully measured as he came closer to where Zack was standing by the door. Cloud had to remind himself there was no reason to be nervous. This wasn't the same Sephiroth he'd known for all of his adult life. This Sephiroth was perfectly sane, a man in control of his emotions and powers. He was the man under Hojo, unaware of where he came from or how his life really began. Cloud's heart lurched painfully and drummed a staccato rhythm against his ribs. This Sephiroth was _not_ diabolical or a sociopath. _General_ Sephiroth was a powerful man, assertive on and off the field, and brilliant. He was a taciturn, observant, direct, calculating man that might see through Cloud's farce in a second.

Oh shit.

Cloud definitely stopped breathing there.

All the things Cloud knew—Lucrecia, Vincent, Hojo, Jenova—all of that was Sephiroth's history. Cloud's intimate and detailed knowledge was nothing if not incredibly suspicious, and if Sephiroth ever got an inkling that Cloud might have dabbled where he shouldn't have then there would be hell to pay.

Zack started to talk again, but Cloud couldn't hear the words. He knew he might be able to pull the wool over Zack's eyes, but Sephiroth played a whole different game that the rest of the world could barely keep up with. Cloud had known that life was the same as war to Sephiroth, just done more subtly and occasionally with less violence.

He would have to be careful. Not forgettable maybe, because ultimately that wouldn't help the future, but certainly not remarkable either. He needed to keep his cool, be calm, and be brave. It was stupid to be cowardly here after all he'd seen. Cloud repeated that line in his head as Zack moved forward and threw open the door with flourish.

* * *

Reno sauntered down the hallway at an unhurried pace, musing over the missing Cloud. The blond hadn't been in dinner when he got there, which Reno found annoying. Even worse, everyone had been talking about how First Class SOLDIER Lieutenant General Zack Fair pulled him out. Reno didn't generally like not knowing why something was happening under his nose like that. He liked to know where predictable people should be, and Cloud, who hadn't made a splash with the First as far as he could tell, had seemed the predictable type.

Well, when people proved you wrong, you changed your idea.

The redhead scratched along one scar on his face and idly wondered where the SOLDIER First Fair came into all this. That black-haired man was a hard opponent; Reno could see it right away why the man was Lieutenant General, the same way the weaker predator knows when he's in the wrong territory. It made Reno wonder just what he was doing down with the cadets, and in particular Cloud. Surely he had some Thirds to bother? Or even a Seconds platoon to train?

Or maybe he had noticed something different about Cloud too; something in the blond's manner that drastically changed overnight. It was like all the confidence Cloud had been missing had been shoved into his head in one go. He just woke up one morning, and Reno had looked over and had practically seen double. Where was the angsty, anonymous, struggling Cloud?

Reno almost put the hair he was tugging on in his mouth then thought better of it. He had just gotten off the training fields, and his hair was lank and sweaty. He tucked the lock behind his ear and stuffed his hands in his pockets. He lazily turned the corner in a wide arc and rounded his way down to the cadet barracks.

People had been noticing what Reno had picked up on too. Cloud had gotten suddenly become less shy and more standoffish, and he'd started training all the time with a new dedication that probably put most SOLDIERs to shame. But why?


	5. You Make Me Wild-Eyed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cloud meets Sephiroth, and Reno is getting suspicious.

The door was thrown open spectacularly and slammed into the wall as Zack strolled in, completely nonplussed that he had just intruded on the General's office without so much as a knock. This was not a new thing now, and Sephiroth completely ignored the intrusion. Cloud, unsure what was okay or not, was still standing just beyond the threshold.

The General of Shinra's army was seated in a high-backed leather chair facing the door. Cloud could see the sharp lines of his face and the angular set of his brows as he read over the papers in front of him. His white collared shirt dipped enough to hint at the corded muscles under his skin, particularly where it was rolled up to his elbows. Cloud's eyes snaked along the lean strength of his arms and traced the broad shoulders up to where strands of his moonlight hair collected.

Even head bowed and concentrated on work, wearing a button-up instead of leather, Sephiroth commanded the attention of the room. Cloud knew immediately just why Sephiroth was _the_ General.

His desk was uncluttered except for neat stacks of folders and papers. The accompanying high-tech computer sat off to the side. The thick mahogany desk matched the dark color of the bookshelves that lined the walls on either side of him. Each was packed with important and thick books of varying dull colors. The titles announced themselves as mostly maps and various cultural history of different regions, along with a number on military strategy.

Zack walked in, ignoring the tinge of annoyance that appeared on Sephiroth's face that lasted for just a moment. The SOLDIER must have been used to the heat of the General's glares, because he hardly gave it a passing thought before he had picked up one of the paperweights, a glass swan, on the desk and begun to fiddle with it.

"Hey Sephiroth, I brought all those copies. I swear none of them are creased or folded and there's not a single coffee stain on them, right Cloud?"

Said blond had taken two steps forward from the doorway into the room, and now seemed to be wavering between the hallway and the office. Fear and longing shot through Cloud, and he rested on the balls of his feet, feeling extremely unsure of himself. However, all thoughts flew right out of his head when Sephiroth's penetrating gaze fell on him.

The expression of abject boredom with just a hint of curiosity was what Cloud saw upon his first direct look at Sephiroth. The man was at his most relaxed; nothing as Cloud remembered him. His blade lay off to the side of the room on a stand, deceptively peaceful though still within a step's reach. Sephiroth's casual self-assurance and absentminded masculinity made him all the more dangerous to Cloud. It reminded him of the quiet before a battle.

The hum of the air vent above the door cut through the heavy silence. The papers were like deadweight in his arms. He could pick up the subtle rustling of clothing as Zack yawned, and the slightest whisper as the air picked up some of Sephiroth's hair. He knew he was staring, but it had been a long time since Sephiroth had really looked like _Sephiroth_ ,the man whose stories Cloud had once hung on to every word of.

Zack's voice echoed loudly in Cloud's ears and pulled Sephiroth's hypnotic green eyes away from his scrutiny. The trance broke, and while it had felt like an hour it had probably been only a handful of seconds.

"Just dump them anywhere, Cloud." Zack motioned in the general direction of the desk. He flopped down in the only available chair and settled himself in. Zack casually leaned back in his chair, one leg propped over the armrest. "Why don't you get a secretary to do this, Seph?"

The General made no reply as he turned back to Cloud. His heavy gaze settled on the blond, and Cloud tried to blink away the double vision that suddenly assaulted him. Sephiroth's lucid face betrayed no weakness, no insecurity at all, but Cloud could remember the wild insanity and the feverish light in those orbs.

"Just put them there." He spoke directly to Cloud, indicating the corner of his desk with one long finger as he did. The deep melodic voice washed over Cloud's senses and made his heart rate take off. He took a short breath to gather himself before stepping forward and carefully putting the papers down, making sure not to jostle anything on the desk. Sephiroth acknowledged the action with a nod and a low, "Thank you."

Cloud stepped back quickly, feeling more heat in his cheeks, and his eyes flickered around the room so he wouldn't have to keep looking at the General. Flustered, anxious, that was only what Cloud felt when he saw his reflection on Masamune. The sword lay off to the side, perfectly polished and gleaming, and Cloud's blue eyes and dull, flushed face was mirrored back at him. It was the first time looking at this blade that he felt unsure and afraid. Every time he had faced down Sephiroth before he'd been awash in feelings, but always determined. Now he couldn't see that at all.

It stung him back to reality as much as seeing the pale blue eyes he once had without any mako glow. This wasn't him. He hadn't been that little boy in a long time. Even if he had the body of him, he still _wasn't_ him.

As Cloud's eyes moved away from the sword, they inevitably fell back on the General, that regal, impassive facestill watching him. If Cloud could look a mad Sephiroth in the eye and kill him, as painful as that knowledge was, then how could he let this Sephiroth, who didn't fanatically want Cloud's death, intimidate him? Was he truly that spineless?

He put his hands behind his back, trying to look more humble even as he straightened up a bit. With a breath to calm himself, the blond looked the General directly in the eye, surely tempting some deity to strike him down for his insolence. Sephiroth was an extraordinary man, and Cloud acknowledged that even as he stood tall. "If I may be excused, sir."

Sephiroth tilted his chin up ever so slightly, clearly acknowledging Cloud's change of attitude as a challenge. His eyes darkened imperceptibly and his mouth twitched before flattening out. "You're excused, Cadet Strife." Sephiroth nodded to Cloud and turned back to his paperwork. He pointedly ignored Zack who was slouching in his chair, though his eyes were bright as he glanced at Cloud.

Cloud nodded, already his flush of confidence beginning to ebb, and looked at neither occupant of the room as he left. He closed the door behind him, resisting the urge to run as he left the office, and walked back down through the lounge. He reached the elevator in record time, hardly aware of how fast he was moving, and pushed the button three times, even as the elevator door inched open. He was lucky it was still on this floor; that meeting couldn't have lasted five minutes. As soon as the doors shut though, he slumped over and tried to take some deep, even breaths. The adrenaline was leaving his system, and he couldn't believe just one meeting with Sephiroth had done that to him.

_Oh Planet._

* * *

Zack exhaled quietly when the door shut behind Cloud. The tension in the room had mounted to dangerous heights as Sephiroth inspected a very edgy-looking Cloud for a couple of seconds. Some very prolonged seconds.

Zack had his suspicions on whether or not Sephiroth derived a certain enjoyment in making people squirm or if he just did it unintentionally, but whatever the case, the General had certainly been on the verge of turning Cloud into a puddle of chocobo-colored cadet. The boy had looked so uncomfortable at first that Zack was sure Cloud was on the verge of fainting. It wouldn't be the first time someone had in this office.

Zack's gaze returned to the General, who's attention had seemed to return to his work, though the First knew better. He could tell Cloud had left an impression. Sephiroth's reputation had become so exaggerated and his own emotionless façade so impressive that he tended to scare people the first they met him. It had taken Zack several meetings with Sephiroth with Angeal's bostlering him before he felt comfortable enough to make direct eye contact like Cloud had. Even the President of Shinra was wary around the General, and referred to him solely by rank, not name, and he certainly avoided eye contact after the Wutai War.

So Zack was pleased but also curious about Cloud's backbone. Zack frankly hadn't been expecting that, but had anticipated walking the anxious blond out himself.

"Is there anything more you need, Zackary?" Sephiroth's annoyance was practically palpable. Everyone had been surprised, it seemed, and Sephiroth hated to be surprised.

Zack warmed up immediately to some conversation. It was just what he needed to get his mind back on track. "Don't you just want to bask in-"

"No." The General's face fell into a familiar determined look that Zack had come to love. It meant Sephiroth was digging in for a battle, and he rarely ever bothered to do that.

"C'mon Seph. You've got the best window on the floor. Can't I just sit in the sunlight for a little longer?" Zack tried to wean a little mercy out of some crack in the General's heart, but he knew that on certain matters there was none to be had.

"Zackary, it is evening and half of these copies are for you to sign." Sephiroth picked up the pile and neatly divided it. One quarter was put on top of his own pile of paperwork; the other three quarters were dropped right in front of Zack's could be an asshole like that.

The SOLDIER's face immediately fell and he groaned. "Are you serious? Man, you could have told me that Seph. I wouldn't have copied them then. That'll take me forever."

Zack complained, but Sephiroth's no-nonsense face was back in place. "I can clear your schedule on Tuesday and Thursday evenings to work with Strife, but the paperwork has to be completed."

Sephiroth shuffled some papers around and pretended to ignore Zack. The SOLDIER paused, surprised that Sephiroth had gone down without a fight. The First had been prepared to badger Sephiroth into submission to let him teach Cloud, but the General frowned at any sort of favoritism, especially from someone as high-ranking as Zack. Cloud had definitely left an impression.

"I'll squish it in on Wednesday."

"As long as it's done."

Zack grinned and jumped up. "Thanks Seph."

* * *

Cloud stepped inside his barrack, the smell of dirty laundry and sweat permeated making his nose wrinkle automatically. He was getting used to it, but it was hardly the scent of the desert or the fresh vegetables Tifa kept stuffing into his bag. It could have been worse though; it could have smelled like Barret's AVALANCHE headquarters—a mixture of beer, male musk, and seafood.

Bunk beds lined every wall of the room, each distinctive of the personality of their owner. It was the only place in Shinra that was a cadet's own and it showed. Cloud's own bunk's sheets were relatively straight, with no baubles hanging from the posts or lewd pictures on the wall. He had hardly owned anything when he first came here, and Cloud had grown up to be a man of simplicity. He had very little time, what with AVALANCHE and saving the planet, to collect odds and ends.

What few things he had were under the bed. There were a handful of pictures along with some holiday cards and a switchblade. Unused clothes remained under there too, along with a special clipping from a newspaper—the day the Wutai War ended. There in the front of the picture, amidst the battlefield of broken bodies, was a glorious and triumphant Sephiroth. As close to happy as he ever looked.

Cloud lingered on the threshold. His body thrummed ready and alert despite his tired mental state. Just as he stepped into the center area, Reno's bright red hair became visible as he sat up on his own bed.

"Where you been, Cloud?" His rough accent and lopsided grin were quite familiar, and even though they hadn't been friends, the sight made Cloud a little nostalgic. They'd had a professional relationship after the Remnants, so Cloud knew Reno was entirely a bad guy.

"About." Cloud shrugged, trying to act nonchalant. His mind was still whirring in a vortex from what had happened tonight. Reno's nosiness was not what he needed. What he needed was to collapse and go straight to sleep, even if he had to knock Reno unconscious to do it.

Cloud ignored Reno and changed into pajamas, but he could still feel Reno's stare and that made him wary. He rather hoped the redhead would just spit out whatever he felt the need to bother Cloud with.

Finally Reno got tired of waiting him out. "Yo, what's with the SOLDIER? You disappeared in dinner, and people say you left with him."

"Why do you care?" Cloud asked more sharply than intended. It had been a long day, but Reno didn't know that as the redhead screwed his face up in mock pain.

"Ouch. Didn't mean nothing by it." Reno rubbed his jaw, and the suspicious glimmer in his eyes brightened. Luckily Cloud didn't care about gossip anymore, though he knew he might still regret being so curt with the redhead. His patience was in tatters though, and he needed to think on everything, so he just had no energy to care.

"'Night," he muttered, hoping Reno would take the hint. Cloud lied down on his bunk facing the wall, trying to will the swirling and unraveling thoughts and memories to come to some sort of peace.

Reno stared at the hard lines of Cloud's back. Cloud's manner was bothering him—the brevity with which he spoke, the unnatural lines of stress, the whole "world-on-my-shoulders" feeling that just would not go away. How had he changed that much in less than a week?

Drama queen, that's what, Reno thought immediately, but he knew that wasn't the truth as he pulled off his boots. No matter what crazy ideas he came up with nothing so far explained the sharp turnaround in Cloud. The blond had been the stubborn short kid that tried to tough out everything that came at him, no matter how unfair. Now his stoicism had become a hardened shell, almost frightening at times like that glare he'd shot Reno a minute ago. Cloud was practically a whole new person now.

The curiosity just ate away at Reno as he kept staring at Cloud's back, silently willing Cloud to turn around and 'fess up. The redhead pulled off his other boot rather aggressively, trying to control the urge to throw it at the blond or get up and shake him hard enough to knock the answer from him. Information meant power where Reno came from, and Shinra was no exception. Having aces up his sleeve meant a longer life, and only the truly stupid didn't keep their ears open.

It brought a bitter taste to Reno's mouth as he thought of all the naïve SOLDIER wannabes. All those kids who would die on their first mission totally lost and encumbered by fear and uncertainty. Reno was above that. He knew he could think on his feet and was agile enough to get out of deep trouble when he saw it. If he didn't know better, Cloud's body language would say the same.

And he damn well would know soon.

"Reno." Cloud's voice was a little muffled from the coverlet and speaking towards the wall, but the words came clearly to the redhead. There was steel there, blanketed by exhaustion, but steel nonetheless.

"Hm?"

"Stop staring at me."


	6. Fighting Under the Radar

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cloud's first lesson with Zack isn't his best, and Reno's up to something.

Tuesday's dinner consisted of unapproachable meat and some dark pink unidentifiable sauce slathered over it. Cloud picked at the recognizable mashed potatoes on the side. Dan sat across from him and dug straight into his food, either uncaring or ignorant to the potential chemicals and bacteria he was ingesting. Though a messy eater, Dan was nothing compared to Barret, and Cloud effectively ignored it.

The days were going by more quickly. Cloud, who never got much sleep anyway, had found himself dozing in class as he listened to litanies of information he already knew or knew was perfectly useless. Dan had firmly attached himself to the blond now, trailing after him to class and partnering with him in training. Dan really wanted to be friends, if his effort was anything to go by, and Cloud hadn't really minded. It was nice to have some company now and then, and Dan had quickly learned not to bother filling in the silence with pointless words.

Zack's promise of a Wutain dinner had yet to come, but Cloud knew that Zack's workday was hectic, and he assumed the black-haired man had simply forgotten. It felt arrogant to ask about it, so Cloud let it go. The SOLDIER had more important duties to worry about than trivial dinners he promised to a cadet. The disappointment stung, but Cloud was sure Zack hadn't meant it.

The workouts in the mornings were still going on, and a couple of boys in his bunker had begun to notice, and he'd heard some rumors floating around. Cloud didn't care if they knew or not. Their concerns were nothing to him; he had far bigger things to worry about. No said anything to him, not even Dan, but their incredulous expressions spoke for themselves. Cloud was secretly a little upset with his progress, though it had only been days. His muscles cramped, he was always sore, and the strength and endurance he'd long cultivated were gone. He was…frail, and he loathed the feeling of his own weakness. He pushed himself harder and harder to deny the anger inside at it, even as he knew he was risking himself for injury. The mako and Hojo's tinkering had made him feel invincible sometimes, and without it things would be much harder.

The sound of a clattering tray and a voice turned Cloud's head away from his despondent staring at the soggy potatoes. Reno had practically thrown himself on to the seat after he slid his tray down the table towards Cloud. He only did it for the attention, Cloud knew.

The redhead ate his food with relish, continually moving the utensil to his mouth. He really reminded everyone of a greedy street child when he ate like that, like his next meal wasn't guaranteed.

Dan seemed to freeze at Reno's presence, unsure why he was joining them so suddenly. After all, most people probably thought Cloud was the only person who had enough patience to sit through Dan's one-sided conversations. Reno was an entirely different story, though. The redhead had friends, groups he hung out with. Already people were beginning to pick up on the different vibe, and Cloud could feel them staring at the motley group at his table. It was unpleasant, but not unwarranted. He was as confused about Reno's choice of seating as everyone else, but he didn't say anything. He could deal with whatever the redhead came up with. Reno was still just a kid after all without any Turk training to deal with and no dirt on Cloud.

The blond shrugged it away even as Dan was staring pointedly at Reno. Politics of the cadet world in Shinra were hardly his concern, and Reno could do as he pleased so long as he wasn't poking around Cloud too much.

"Is that salt?" Reno looked away from his food and pointed to the cheap, clear, plastic shaker at the end of the metal table. Dan's gaze didn't leave the redhead for a moment, if anything he only bristled when Reno spoke, but Cloud looked away from the two of them in surprise. At the end of the table was a pitiful shaker of salt. Since when did Shinra have condiments in the cafeteria?

"Hmmm… Maybe they'll have ketchup someday." Reno's face lit up in a wistful grin, obviously thrilled with the idea. He turned then to Cloud and Dan, "So, what are you guys gonna do Friday?" Reno's sidelong glance didn't get past Cloud's notice, but the blond ignored it. The redhead was probably gauging his reactions, trying to get a better feel of him. It was better than Dan's direct approach, but far more annoying.

The Friday coming up was Memorial Day, and even the Shinra army got off. All the Wutai War veterans were honored in a big parade on the plate, followed by the procession of families of those who lost loved-ones in the war. Many SOLDIERs walked for their comrades too. Business flourished as people came into Midgar to see the parade. Despite the day being choked by Shinra propaganda, the entertainment was well worth the trip. That, and General Sephiroth marched in the parade himself.

Cloud had gone when he'd been a cadet before. It had been a spectacular event from what little he recalled, no one could deny Shinra that, but it was been exclusively for the people above the plate. Those who lived under the plate could come, though most couldn't afford the train ticket.

Cloud remembered little of the actual event. Most of it was military salutes and sobbing families. The moment that stuck out in his mind was when General Sephiroth marched out in front. Dressed in pristine white, adorned with sparkling metals and bright ribbons announcing his prestigious rank and awards, he had strode at the front of the marching line of First Class SOLDIERs, all glittering with their own metals. It had been amazing. That had been the first time Cloud could recall seeing Sephiroth in person, with his regal bearing as he headed the best SOLDIERs in the world; Cloud's heartbeat had been loud enough to drown out the band.

The blond turned to Reno as the redhead watched him with curious eyes. "Nothing." The parade was the same every year, and Cloud wanted to take as much advantage as he could of a day free from the hassles of the other boys. This Friday he could avoid most of the other cadets, who would undoubtedly go to the parade to see the SOLDIERs and the General. Nearly everyone on the Shinra compound would be marching or watching, and no one would notice if Cloud wasn't in the crowd. The blond had planned to claim an empty room that day and hopefully get his hands on a proper sword. The lock on the weapon cabinet would be laughably easy after what Yuffie had taught him.

Reno shrugged nonchalantly. "I'm plannin' on going under. Gotta pick up some stuff." He rattled off a list of various necessities, mostly food, though he mentioned a new switchblade and some bullets (which made Dan twitch). Reno waved his fork around as he spoke, his red hair flopping around in its ponytail the way a rat's tail whips around behind it. It was a brighter red than Cloud remembered, but not nearly as long.

Dan turned back to his food with a scoff, rudely ignoring Reno, who in turn ignored him. Cloud was only half-listening to either of them. He had more important things on his mind—most notably the near future. Tonight would be his first lesson with Zack. He had been terribly anxious since Zack found him in the weight-room lifting last Saturday. He had been bench-pressing when Zack barged in, and only Cloud's quick reflexes saved him from dropping the barbell on his chest. Cloud's moment of surprise, all wide-eyed and clutching the barbell with white hands, had Zack cracking up. Cloud's self-consciousness won out, and his cheeks had tinged pink with embarrassment. He hated to be caught unprepared.

The SOLDIER had told him the only times he was given to train Cloud were Tuesday and Thursday nights, but if he had free time he promised to find Cloud. Even if it was only two days a week, it meant a couple of hours of Zack to himself.

Zack was an excellent teacher and mentor and had probably gotten some of his tricks of being a disciplinarian from Sephiroth. He could be relentless and mulishly stubborn, which made him difficult to work with at times. However, he imparted lessons that went above and beyond just swordplay, and it meant the world to Cloud.

It also terrified him.

Zack usually came off to people as laid-back and fun, but not always quick on the uptake. It was an impression he'd told Cloud he loved because people came to underestimate his powers of observation. Cloud, however, knew Zack was anything but stupid. The man proved to be quite clever and often picked up on subtleties people rarely noticed.

Especially after the group sword lessons and the disastrous materia class, Cloud was mortifyingly aware that his previous skills were quite apparent to anyone who really thought about it. The blond knew without a doubt Zack would pick up on it fast. Cloud knew he couldn't fool Sephiroth, and if worked too hard to hold back any abilities, resisted his reflexes or fought too cautiously, he'd be all over Zack's radar, who would immediately see through it. Then he'd probably be poked and prodded and pulled until Cloud dropped some enormous clue.

Zack had probably already heard about the materia incident, and with a couple more tip-offs he could easily assemble a story to fit Cloud's 'prodigal' abilities. Of course, the SOLDIER would want a full confession out of Cloud, along with some good reasons for hiding it, and then potentially evidence. All of which Cloud had none of.

Where Zack could be clever at getting people to open up, Sephiroth excelled when it came to prying out the words. During the Wutai War he'd been famous for a lot of things, but one of them was his quick and civil interrogations; he hadn't needed brutality or tricks to get people to spill secrets. A couple of comments about Cloud's surprising ability, and the blond would have a seat with the General.

Therefore, Cloud's excitement for the lesson had been mixed with the most horrible feelings of doubt.

Cloud glanced up at the digital clock at the front of the cafeteria. He still had some time before the lesson started. He had to get his water bottle from his room before he headed to the gym. Zack would probably be waiting for him, already warmed up and ready to go.

Despite eating barely any food Cloud's stomach was in upheaval from the nerves. The blond stood up and dumped the remainder of his dinner in the trash. Dan looked up at him surprised, but Reno looked almost as if he had been waiting for it. Cloud nodded to both of them before walking out the swinging doors. Reno followed him out the door and called out to him in the hall.

"Hey wait Cloud! I was wonderin' something." Cloud turned around to look at Reno. The redhead caught up and kept in stride with him as he talked. "I'm goin' under the plate Friday, do you want to come? I know some great places to get some _good_ stuff." Reno was smiling again, and it was both knowing and devious. Cadets were still in training, and therefore weren't allowed to have their own weapons while on Shinra grounds. Unsurprisingly Reno knew where to get one.

It would have to be cheap. Cadets had to pay to be trained, and the only allowance Cloud got was from his mother on his birthday. At the moment he was dirt poor and couldn't make real money unless he joined the regulation army—like he'd ever stoop to that level again—or became a SOLDIER. Still, what money he had amassed was enough to get a good knife off the black market.

What Reno's offer didn't entail, but tempted Cloud so much more, was the thought of Aeris. She still lived in the Sector 5 slums at this time, and if anyone might understand his predicament, it would be her. Cloud wanted to see her again. He wanted to apologize once and for all too, for letting her down so long ago. Then just do his best to avoid another mistake.

"Sure. Let's take the earliest train though." Reno frowned at that. He was hoping to at least get the chance to watch some of the parade. He had lived in the slums after all, and hadn't gone up before to see it. Despite that, he was pleased Cloud was coming with him. It was a chance at having Cloud all to himself; in an environment he knew Cloud would rely on him to get around in.

* * *

Cloud proved himself right when he entered the gym. Zack was swinging around a basic broadsword, muscles already warm, and his eyes glimmering excitedly. He was like a little kid sometimes, and it made it easy for a couple moments to forget that he had fought in the war on the frontlines and earned that First Class SOLDIER rank.

"Just start stretching and warming-up. I don't want you pulling anything, and you should always do that before practice or heading into a fight—if you get the chance."

Cloud turned away to put down his water bottle and begin basic stretches while Zack talked. When he was ready, Zack handed him a sword—a proper one this time, not a wooden one. Cloud swung it around a couple times, already appreciating the sound of metal through air.

"Feels good, huh?" Zack asked, and Cloud just nodded, but his lips quirked in a small smile.

"Okay, Let's do this right this time. Just relax and imagine I'm some hideous giant monster who knows how to use a sword." Zack's teasing grin didn't get the blush he was looking for. Cloud shrugged instead, but looked away uncomfortably. He was still a little embarrassed by his reaction last week both with the General and when Zack singled him out. He was determined this lesson wouldn't be like the swordplay class, but that sentiment didn't settle his nerves at all.

The SOLDIER didn't wait another beat before lifting up his own weapon and taking up a basic ready stance: legs evenly apart, knees slightly bent, and sword held out with two hands in front of him. The muscles in his shoulders were corded with strength, and the dull blade looked lethal in his hands. Cloud immediately took his own defensive stance, except his sword only required a one-handed grip. Years of habit with the Buster Sword made Cloud almost reach out to put his other hand on the hilt, before thinking better of it. Double-handed blades tended to be longer and heavier, and were therefore more difficult to wield. Cadets weren't taught how to handle those until they joined SOLDIER and specialized.

Zack smirked in response to Cloud's guard, and nodded his head to show Cloud was standing properly. They moved in a tight circle first, Zack watching his footing and balance. Then he made some slow hits on Cloud, careful to watch the movements of the blond, especially his wrists and shoulders.

Cloud tried to ignore the tedium of the simple maneuvers and focused on making mistakes. The exaggerated parrying and thrusting was pretty simple on the upper body, so Cloud concentrated on his footwork and his wrist angle. Even those moves, the ones he had memorized after years and years of hard training, cadet Cloud would still be a little shaky on. He purposefully crossed his legs unnecessarily, twisted his wrist unnaturally to make a block, and even made glances down at his feet to double-check himself. He felt a little ridiculous, but Zack lightly chastised him and corrected him every time, and it seemed to be doing the trick.

Zack just smiled as Cloud stumbled a step when he deliberately shifted his weight wrong, and it made Cloud wary. Zack's face didn't reveal any suspicions, but Cloud was cautious nonetheless. Soon the slow pace became maddening for them both, and Zack sped up the moves slightly.

"If you want me to go faster Cloud, then all you gotta do is ask." Zack's wolfish grin, and the innuendo behind his words stained Cloud's cheeks a darker red than they already were.

This time, Zack came at Cloud a little faster and a little harder, forcing Cloud to respond in kind. It was still far from the normal speed of a swordfight, but more interesting and far more difficult for Cloud. It was harder to concentrate on mistakes when he was moving faster, and he was reacting automatically. He focused instead on keeping an open expression of tiredness or surprise, and making sure to miss the block on occasion. It was exhausting work, and he knew his footwork was clumsy for it, luckily.

"C'mon Cloud, I know you can keep up."

He could feel the weakness in his limbs and knew his endurance was reaching its limit. Keeping up this pace for an extended amount of time just wasn't possible at the moment, though Cloud frowned and promised himself to keep it up until Zack called it off. He needed to know his real limits, and more importantly to eventually break them.

Their fight continued to escalate. Zack didn't do anything fancy, but his unending stream of attacks and heavy hits caused Cloud to falter for real a couple of times. He was embarrassed by it, but he was more concerned with how quick his reaction time was. His survival instincts ingrained in him demanded that he keep moving, that he keep going, that he _overcome_.

Losing had become unfamiliar territory after years of being—literally—the strongest person alive, and everything in him repulsed against losing, even in a spar. He had the world depending on him. He had people's dreams, hopes, and their very lives relying on him. He couldn't lose.

But Cloud had to tell himself this didn't count, that this wasn't important, and moreover, he _couldn't_ win. One, because this was Zack, and Zack was a First Class SOLDIER and Cloud was a cadet, and two, because Cloud just didn't have it in him. Yet.

Cloud grimaced as he felt himself wearing down as the fight continued. What frustrated Cloud even more than his lack of stamina was his own body's failure to follow his commands. Even as Zack moved, Cloud eyes saw the motions and predicted the action to intercept the blade. His arms couldn't seem to get there fast enough though, and his body was unable to duck and evade when necessary. The fight progressed until a rather hard clash of the blades had Cloud stumbling backwards to his knees, and Zack flicking the tip of his blade to Cloud's neck. The SOLDIER's smile was genuine, but there was something else too.

"Nice work, Cloud. You've surprised me." Cloud panted even as he schooled his face into a neutral expression as soon as the words registered. He couldn't make any assumptions about what Zack meant. He could just mean it as a compliment.

Contrary to what Cloud thought though, Zack didn't quite mean it that way. Cloud was certainly hiding something, his face was stiffer than natural, and he hadn't responded to the pseudo-compliment. The blond had been an excellent student; fixing every mistake he made almost immediately, without needed demonstrations, a push or two, or repeated emphasis. He made the same mistakes only a handful of times, whereas most beginners made them repeatedly before it was trained out of them, especially as they got stressed and distracted. Along with that, he rarely made multiple mistakes at the same time. All of this was very suspicious for someone who should have almost no experience with a sword.

Which implied Cloud had previous knowledge and a good feel for sword fighting.

What made the least sense were his impeccable technique and his lack of physical ability to back it up. Cloud's stamina gave out quickly. They had been hardly going for fifteen minutes when it was clear he was tiring. He'd stuck with it stubbornly, which Zack liked, but it was still strange, to say the least, and terribly fishy.

The crease in Zack's brow, though subtle, was still noticeable to Cloud, who was familiar with many of the First's quirks. Zack was confused, and it made Cloud unaccountably nervous.

The blond dusted himself off, more for the sake of something to do than anything else, and stood up. Zack nodded his head at the closet, indicating today's brief session was over now that he had a feel for where Cloud was ability speaking. The blond could feel Zack's eyes on his back as he took his sword over to the closet. When Cloud turned back to Zack after putting away his sword, the SOLDIER was smiling. At first glance it was perfectly genuine, but Cloud was sure he reading something indulgent in it too. Zack knew something was up and he'd let him get away today, but the blond might not be so lucky another time.

Cloud pushed aside what that meant and gave Zack his own half smile and a quiet thanks. He already knew he'd be up all night thinking of now to improve his bad fighting form. Even though Zack knew something was up, Cloud wasn't ready to tell him anything. The terror of telling Zack the truth was overwhelming. The abandonment, betrayal, the fear, all of those emotions was something Cloud didn't think he'd ever want to see on Zack's face. No one wanted to know about their own death with circumstances like that, and Cloud certainly didn't want to repeat those horrid events. They were best kept in his own faulty memory and left there.

Zack spoke up, and the blond was sure if he'd been sixteen properly he'd never have caught the subtle strain of suspicion behind his cheerful voice. "Make sure you stretch so you don't cramp your muscles. Endurance is something that'll come with time though, so don't sweat it Spike. I've got a pretty good idea of what we can start working on next time."

They left the room after they collected their things, Cloud letting the older man lead him through the halls. The blond couldn't deny the smidgen of guilt inside him as Zack looped an arm around Cloud's shoulders. It was as bad as lying, all the faking and hiding. Saying it was out of necessity didn't make Cloud feel any better.

Still, he bit his tongue and didn't say a word, though Cloud expected Zack was gearing up for a "you-can-talk-to-me-about-anything" chat. The blond knew he wouldn't be taking Zack up on his offer, and that he couldn't let his guilty feelings have any say. Some things just had to be done, and sometimes they required a certain level of apathy. Sephiroth had taught him that.

Cloud's bunker came into view and the pair stopped right in front of Cloud's door. "Thursday at the same time, don't forget Spike." Zack's smile was more genuine this time. He ruffled Cloud's hair. "You know Cloud, you can talk to me about anything." He paused for a half second, waiting for the blond to say something, but Cloud just nodded and averted his eyes, focusing on the ground. The SOLDIER seemed to be thinking for a moment, before he pulled Cloud into a one-armed hug, stepped away, and walked back down the hall.

* * *

The barrack was silent, only broken by the murmurs and breathing of the sleepers. Dan slept stiffly, almost reminiscent of Vincent's guarded sleep, though Dan's was far deeper and more at ease. No nightmares haunted him. Reno, in turn, was sprawled out ungracefully, one leg and some of that wild red hair loosely falling off the side. The blankets were bunched around him and held close, like someone might take them in his sleep.

Cloud moved from the doorway, barely consciously aware of what he was doing. His body was shutting down on him, his right arm he could barely feel, and his brain was becoming foggier with sleep. He stripped quickly and tossed the sweaty clothes under his bed.

The welcoming pillow and blanket couldn't be denied, and Cloud flopped down and slid under the sheets quickly. He curled up to try and keep the warmth from Zack's hug from seeping away, and almost immediately fell asleep.


	7. Valentine's Trigger

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shooting practice and mock battles--cadet training is pretty intense.

His eyes burned and moved frantically beneath their lids. Constricted. His lungs couldn't take in air. He clawed desperately at the blanket, begging and snarling in turns as he fought the covers and finally threw them off.

Cloud sat up in bed panting, his chest on fire and his forehead matted with sweat. Unconsciously he glanced down at the curve of his left elbow, but unmarred flesh was all he saw. No pinprick of blood. No visible blue vein or bruises from straps holding him down. His felt a shudder run up his spine as he thought back to those nightmarish years of imprisonment. He banished the memories before that could take form. A dream. It had all been a dream.

His skin itched and burned though, the way it had after any kind of mako exposure. Every nerve felt raw, and it left his skin tingling and highly sensitive. The coarseness of his covers irritated him beyond belief and he pushed the last part covering his legs to the floor with relief. Cloud scooted to the edge of his bunk carefully, trying not to aggravate his overly sensitized body. He hunched over with his head in his hands just breathing quietly and unclenching his fists in his hair. Vividly violent. That was how his dream was.

Vivid, violent, green.

He looked up from his bunk and stood up. His skin was cooling down already and he was beginning to feel chilled. In fact, so cold it was like his pants were-

His pants!

The covers were whipped up from the floor and around his waist in a flash. Horrified, the silence lingered as Cloud stood as stilly as possible, thanking the Planet for old habits of waking up before dawn. His face immediately flushed red as he realized that last night he'd been on autopilot, like he was back in his home above Midgar. It hadn't mattered there if he were nude; he hadn't been sharing a room with seven other people.

He stood as still as a stature, taking measure of the room. No one stirred but the gentle breathing of the other occupants in the room. The air in the bunker was stagnant and empty as Cloud took in deep, controlled breaths.

He wasn't the only one taking deep breaths.

Cloud could hear the stilted breathing of someone who was awake, who held in the air too long and exhaled too quickly. His sharp eyes darted around the room, inspecting each bunk to see where that person was facing. All but one had the calm ambience of sleep. Dan's eyelids were twitching awkwardly as he fought to remain relaxed. The boy's bunk was right above Cloud's, but when Cloud had stepped away from his bed he'd left himself open for anyone in the room to see. The boy could easily look down at the flustered Cloud.

Slowly, as though afraid the very sound of his eyelids opening would startle Cloud, Dan peeked over the top of his blanket. His curious gaze met the flustered blue eyes of the blond a bunk below him. Cloud flushed immediately, realizing he'd been caught. He was embarrassed by his nakedness, but he was reacting so strongly too because of that leftover shaky fear from the nightmare.

Dan's face though morphed into a smile, and the other cadet turned over in his bunk to face the wall, obviously giving Cloud some privacy. The blond watched the giggling Dan, wondering what Dan must be thinking. Most guys here would consider nightmares childish because they'd never had a real one as far as Cloud was concerned. Did Dan feel the same? Or did he maybe think Cloud had…

Cloud could feel just a little more red burn in his cheeks when he thought of it. They were teenage boys after all… nocturnal… he couldn't even think the words—were perfectly natural.

It didn't matter, the blond thought, resolutely trying to power through the initial embarrassment. "This never leaves your mouth," he told the kid. He tried to sound threatening, or at least stern, but his voice caught halfway through, and he knew he sounded like a desperate fool. Dan's head nodded, but his shoulders continue to shake even harder than before.

Dan wasn't a kid of malice; in fact, he probably thought this was a joke, Cloud reassured himself. This was the kind of things friends laughed about after all—there had been similar moments with AVALANCHE. You didn't travel with a group of people for months without having some awkward moments. It felt strange to consider Dan in light of that. Cloud hadn't had any friends in Shinra before, and yet now he might even have two. He half-smiled at the thought unconsciously, before he went to get dressed. More sleep was out of the question.

* * *

Because of the holiday on Friday, classes had been shifted around during the later part of the week. The normal Wednesday routine was scrapped and instead replaced with Friday's.

The cadets were taken outside to the shooting range with targets at varying distances across the field. The closest was fifty yards away and they gradually grew further away until the last target could be seen three hundred yards down. The air was slightly cooler today but Cloud still wore a t-shirt. The curve of his left elbow stung at any touch, and he decided it was better to just leave it be rather than aggravate it with wearing a long sleeved jacket.

"You ready?" Reno sidled in next to Cloud as the boys milled about while the instructors talked a little ways away.

"Yeah."

"These guns are such crap here. You should see them down below. Double-barrel shotguns, automatic pistols, foot-long barrels for revolvers, even x-ray scopes, everything a man could ever need. I've even seen a guy with a gun for an arm. Fucking awesome." Cloud nodded at Reno and the redhead grinned back at him. "You're a sword-guy. I like my guns as much as the next guy, but something like a dagger is more my style."

Cloud considered mentioning a nightstick, but thought better of it. Reno would probably find it on his own anyway, and nightsticks weren't very common weapons. Knowing anything about them was probably a little strange, especially for a mountain boy, not to mention Cloud was in no rush to start getting hit by one of them should Reno decide to "test it out".

The instructors broke apart and started to shout at the cadets who reorganized into their line. One trainer came around with a box handing out M16 rifles. They were long and made of black metal, easy to handle but on the heavier side. Cloud had worked with these before because they were standard issue in the army. But even those ones had been a better quality than the ones the cadets were given to practice with. The one he was handed had a dented grip and stained metal. Some of the black paint had worn off from too many fingers and he was sure the barrel wasn't quite straight.

He let it dangle at his side by the fraying shoulder strap as the next instructor came around with bullets already packed into a magazine. These bullets were for practice only and made of old rubber so they smelled like burnt tires. The rubber was supposed to prevent any kind of unnecessary pain or death if it managed to hit somebody, but they still got lodged under the skin at times and hurt like hell to remove. The soap-tipped ones were better, those just caused huge welts when they hit, but those were the ones the SOLDIERs practiced with. Cloud attached the magazine to the gun as the others did the same, clicking it into place.

The instructors backed off to the sides as cadets grouped into threes and stood before a target. He paired up with Dan and Reno as they were the closest to him and stood off the side casually. Dan was among the first group of cadets to go, and he pulled on his earmuffs with determination.

The first round of shots was fired at a standing position with the rifle settled into the crook of their shoulders. Dan flinched and blinked as he fired, twisting his elbow oddly to account for the recoil. Cloud had done that when he was a cadet too, but Vincent had quickly pounded it out of him.

It was soon his turn, so Cloud didn't follow that train of thought for too long. The magazine cartridges held thirty bullets, so he had thirty tries to hit dead center.

When he had been in cadet training, Cloud's aim had been awful. He couldn't have hit Shinra HQ if he tried. When Vincent joined AVALANCHE, the caped man had taken him aside to teach him properly. Even though Cloud normally used a sword with AVALANCHE, there had been instances where a gun was much more useful. Cloud was thankful for the help because he'd had some near misses with Yuffie. Her agile and quick movements in battle would have been his downfall with a gun. Cloud had hardly been able to shoot straight, let alone at an enemy while Yuffie was throwing things and doing cartwheels and back-flips around the battlefield. He had probably had a higher chance of hitting her than one of the Weapons.

This time around the ex-Turk hadn't taught Cloud, so his shot would have to be horrible. Unlike with sword-fighting though, Cloud thought this might actually be fun.

He took aim as seriously as he dared. Fifty yards wasn't all that far and he knew he could probably hit it without too much thought. For now though, he'd need to miss.

He settled into the stance, just leaving one foot off a little, and fired. As expected it skidded past the target. He took aim and tried again. As he continued to fire, it got easier and easier to make a believable miss. He clipped the target a number of times and even hit the outer rim twice, but otherwise his shots were abysmal. Vincent would be rolling in his coffin.

Cloud was almost smiling by the twentieth shot, but when the closest instructor rounded on him, Cloud knew he needed to make it look like he'd been taught something. Just as the Third Class drew close, Cloud fired a direct hit. Reno, who so far had been making jokes and sarcastic comments about Cloud's poor accuracy, whooped loudly. Dan applauded and a younger Cloud would have stifled a shy smile. Now Cloud just wanted to smirk as he fired another shot, glancing off the center just a bit. The instructor frowned at the lack of bullets in the target and gave Cloud a beady-eyed glare, but didn't comment as he walked past. The last couple of shots were fired, and then Cloud stepped back to watch Reno.

Reno almost strutted to the spot. If there was one weapon he knew how to use, it was a gun. Standard in the slums if you wanted to live, and they came pretty cheap and were versatile. Many basic weapons under the plate were relatively easy to come by and affordable with the right connections. The redhead lazily cocked the rifle on his shoulder and fired. Dead center.

Reno saw Dan sullenly look away out of the corner of his eye, and Cloud seemed to be zoning out. Reno took advantage of Cloud's distraction to stick his tongue out at the sulking Dan. Reno took aim again before Dan could retaliate, and fired almost mechanically. He would do several shots at once, then relax and take it up again. They didn't teach cadets to fire anything other than a double-tap, but Reno had found that even the monsters in the slums could sometimes need a good five or six shots before they went down. Reno paused again, and glanced back to give another nasty look at Dan for kicks, catching a glance at Cloud as he did so.

The blond was good. Even as he missed, his brow hadn't creased with frustration, and he hadn't even mumbled a curse or so much as grunted in annoyance. Reno might have been inclined to think Cloud was just stoic about it, if he had been inclined to ignore one of the most basic principles to firing a gun: recoil.

Most new gun users had difficulty taking recoil. Reno had seen newbies on the streets get smacked in the forehead with their own elongated pistols and almost kill themselves with grenade launchers. The cadets here weren't that much better, and many were rubbing bruised shoulders where the M16 had slammed back into them unexpectedly. They tried to teach the trainees how to handle it, but it mostly took experience and learning how to adjust for the weight of the gun and ammunition to get better at it. Cloud, though his accuracy said otherwise, took the recoil smoothly. He caught the backlash automatically, shifting his weight to accommodate for it almost unconsciously. Reno had noticed, even as he guffawed at Cloud's atrocious aim.

He fired his last shot as Dan took up the spot again, and Reno made sure to drop the gun into Dan's hands just to scare him a little. The blond was still staring off into the distance, and Reno weighed asking Cloud about his little show now under cover of all the discharging weapons, but eventually decided not to. Better to make a list and corner the blond properly.

* * *

Cloud slowly ate his lunch as he rolled around ideas about Vincent in his mind. The Turk would probably be the only AVALANCHE member Cloud could turn to who wouldn't think he'd really gone off the deep end this time. And Vincent was nothing if not capable of keeping a secret.

While shooting at the range, Cloud had entertained ideas of how to get Vincent out of his prison. The man would probably jump at any chance to take out Hojo and help Sephiroth, so it stood to reason that he should be Cloud's first real ally. Maybe the first person he could tell about the future he'd lived. Vincent didn't judge. It was an element of his character that Cloud always found comforting. The man had his own demons to deal with, and gave smart advice only when asked. Otherwise, he kept his opinion to himself.

Cloud fought down a smile at some of the positively outrageous ideas he'd had. Red XIII was possibly in the labs somewhere, and if Cloud could get down there then he could send the lion out for him. Cosmo Canyon was just a little south of Nibelheim, so he might be able to convince Red XIII to do him a little favor.

That however, was just about as crazy as asking Aeris or as laughable as asking Vincent's old Turk partner, Verdot, to go. Cloud could envision himself marching into the Turks' offices and telling the head of the division his "deceased" partner was sleeping in a coffin under an abandoned mansion in Nibelheim. If they didn't blow off his head, they'd think Cloud had gone crazy. _Cloud_ would think he'd gone crazy.

Nevertheless, the thought of reaching out to someone and telling the truth was one of relief. The farce was hard to hold up by himself, especially with so many eyes and ears constantly watching him. Cloud's eyes flicked to Reno quickly before looking away. Reno was probably just as astute as Zack, as experience had taught him, and unfortunately he spent a lot more time with the redhead than he did the First.

What Cloud really needed was a confidant and someone to bounce his ideas on. With AVALANCHE things had always been done roughly be consensus, and Cloud preferred leading with the group—he was no authoritarian who decided what was best for all. Unfortunately without any allies there was no one to help him make the decisions that could affect the whole Planet. It was an intimidating thought, and made Vincent's rock-like composure all the more appealing.

Reno noticed how zoned-out Cloud was again today and poked him in the arm with his fork. The blond did that fairly often, considerably more than he used to, and it was a very curious thing. Before he could even get the words out to ask what he was thinking about, Dan threw in his own comment instead. "You falling asleep Cloud? Just didn't sleep well?"

Cloud's face colored a very faint red as Reno glanced at him. The blond's eyes turned back to his plate, and he stared steadfastly at it as his face quickly regained its natural color.

Reno looked between Dan and Cloud briefly. Cloud's face was blank again, but Dan's had a cheeky grin on it. Reno narrowed his eyes suspiciously at their inside joke, but Dan just grinned harder and Cloud looked away awkwardly.

The redhead looked between the two of them, sizing them up.

Sex partners?

No. Cloud was a virgin through and through. He'd proven that the first day he walked through the Shinra doors. He'd been the shyest and quietest kid there no matter how defensive and angry he looked. Reno knew that type—fighting to keep the bullies away before they honed in on the weak prey. No matter how much he had changed in a week or so, Cloud hadn't slept with a soul. Reno would have known.

And Dan was a prude. Even though Reno knew the guy had to be gay, there was no way he'd ever admit it. Or act on it.

Reno didn't say a word about any of it as he went back to his half-eaten lunch.

* * *

The last class of the day was easily one of the most fun during the week, which was probably why it was normally on Friday afternoons. Cloud arched his back a bit to stretch it out. Some of his vertebra popped as his whole body tensed then relaxed again.

Friday's schedule had the best session for last and cadets were grinning in excitement. The weather was good too, which made the relative mood even higher. This particular class occurred no matter what the circumstances: rain, dust storm, fog, anything. Everything, according to the instructors, could and would happen out in the field, so the cadets had better get used to it here. Though they mumbled and grumbled, plenty of boys enjoyed scrabbling through the mud.

They were out on a different training field this time, one set back against some of the weapons sheds and garages for the military vehicles. Boulders and overturned cars were strewn about in muddy banks and between sparsely set groves of trees. It was one of the most basic training courses in the military.

The M16s and rubber bullets were handed out again and the cadets were split up all over the course. In the center of the field stood a group of Third Class SOLDIER instructors with shields the size of bowler hats. They were the targets for this course. First cadet to get close enough to fire a direct hit on the shield won. However, the SOLDIERs were also armed with pellet guns and if they caught anyone moving, they were welcome to fire.

The SOLDIERs' grins said they absolutely relished this chance.

Cloud dropped to his stomach as the whistle was blown. They had to crawl and scramble through the mud and around obstacles to get to a range close enough to shoot. The field was several hundreds yards long and most cadets couldn't aim straight from fifty yards away. The starting line for the groups of cadets was about four hundred yards away, a small ocean when dealing with such a small target.

Above the chaos of the mock battle, unknown to Cloud's knowledge, Zack and Sephiroth stood inside one of the lower lounge levels of the training building that was set closer to the fields. This one had a pool table, and at Zack's insistence, they were down there enjoying their lunch. The General hated to eat in the cafeteria with all the staring SOLDIER Seconds and Thirds anyway, so he didn't mind too much.

Zack grinned as he pointed down to the field several stories below. "Seph, check it out! I think that's Cloud!"

The General sighed but moved over to the window. Zack would happily abandon their pool game to watch his new favorite cadet. Sephiroth stood by the tall window in the lounge and looked down upon the open field. Sure enough, a little blond cadet was peering around a boulder at the circle of four instructors. His hair was distinctive enough to tell it was Strife.

"Look at Cloud go!" Cloud left the shelter of the boulder as another cadet closer in opened fire. The boy hardly got two shots, all of which were totally off anyway, before his shoulder was struck by a returning shot. The blond used a tree to shield himself as a couple more warning shots went off. Then he hit the ground again to move closer.

Sephiroth moved closer to the window to look out. On the other side of the course was a small thicket of cadets. Two of them had moved forward, one of which was crouched on bended knees shuffling slowly across the field. In front of him was a larger and bulkier boy who had clearly been tricked or forced into being the other boy's shield. The two were headed towards a car lying on its side, effectively creating a five-foot high wall of protection from bullets. For some inexplicable reason both boys thought none of the SOLDIERs in the circle would spot them as they shuffled slowly through open field. Sephiroth almost frowned at the idiocy.

"Human body shields won't work in the exam." He gestured to the group that was now under fire. A suspicious looking redhead slinked behind the car in the mayhem as the others ran.

The two commanding officers watched the session continue on. Cloud moved slowly but with more caution than most, but in the end he lost when someone beat him to it. It was one of the boys who had used the human shields. He had climbed into a tree and seemed to be giving orders to the people on the ground. Probably promising to cover them, Zack figured. As the others got picked off as they slithered closer on their bellies, the one in the tree took aim and fired at the center circle. He won, but his "squadron" lost almost all its men.

Zack smiled down at Cloud, who was probably dismayed at being so close. Cloud was by far a better SOLDIER than the man who sacrificed his companions, and Zack knew it showed. Honor in battle was respected in SOLDIER. The man that used his comrades selfishly wasn't welcome.

Inside SOLDIER itself the elite squads had a kind of fraternal bond that banded them together. SOLDIERs that worked only for themselves, no matter how good, were frowned upon. It always became apparent too because SOLDIERs worked in small platoons. Any man who couldn't work with the team could face a lot of trouble. Cloud wouldn't have a problem there, Zack thought proudly. The kid had it made.

Sephiroth turned away as the practice ended, thinking along the same lines as Zack, though not as glowingly. There were always bad apples in the cadet groups, and Sephiroth was rather thankful he had the authority to make sure none of them got into SOLDIER. Unfortunately, that authority also meant he had a lot of papers to sign and busywork to get done. Zack cleared up his own mess and followed Sephiroth back outside to the main Headquarters. Privately he volunteered that he would keep the General updated on Strife's progress. Cloud had real potential, and he wouldn't let Sephiroth forget that.

* * *

Thursday seemed to come and go in a blur. Cloud's mind had grown preoccupied with thoughts of the slums, of meeting Aeris, and he hadn't been able to properly focus on much else. No one really picked up on it though since everyone was too concerned with their own plans to give him much thought. He preferred it that way.

Reno was equally as fidgety. As a cadet, there weren't a lot of chances to really go under the plate. Free time was usually sparse, so chances like tomorrow were rare. Weekends were generally tied up in extra sessions with instructors, short "missions" which were mostly errands within the compound, and if a cadet was lucky, a trip outside Midgar. It was likely that Reno missed some of the activity and atmosphere of the slums. All this structure and rigid order was probably getting to him. As for Dan, he hardly seemed any different. He came from a small town outside Kalm, not too far from the Chocobo Farm, but far enough that he probably hadn't seen the parade before, and that's what he was most looking forward to.

While the other cadets were excited for the next day, Cloud had been both anticipating and dreading his evening lesson. In the end though, it hadn't been that eventful. As the session wore down, Cloud was even enjoying it. Zack was more relaxed and cheerful than the previous one, and seemed a little more willing to ignore his suspicions for the time. Cloud was relieved at this change of heart, but it also piqued his interest. He wondered just what put Zack in such a good mood.

Zack showed Cloud some quick flexes he could practice until Tuesday. The SOLDIER planned to show him some new techniques, but he needed to be more supple and flexible to perform them. As he ran through the various positions, most stressing legs and calves, Cloud had a pretty good idea of what Zack wanted to show him, so the blond ran through the motions eagerly. This particular move, a sidekick followed up with a quick slash of the sword, was terribly useful with a regular sword. Cloud hadn't really needed it for the Buster Sword—it was a little too unwieldy for this technique—but a regular sword made it a mandatory move. It was also something cadets didn't touch on, and Cloud felt more than ready to "learn" it.

The session closed with Zack laughing at Cloud's abysmal flexibility. The blond hadn't been particularly agile as a kid, and in AVALANCHE all the women and even Vincent surpassed him there. He was probably better off than most cadets, but still very far behind SOLDIER.

As he opened the door to his bunker and began to methodically remove his clothes for bed, he mentally added flexibility stretches to his morning routine. Already his body was getting used to functioning on few hours of sleep. The change was difficult, but with mako injections as a SOLDIER any side effects would be erased. Cloud wasn't worried.


	8. Slumming It

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cloud and Reno head down to the slums, and the shock of the poverty never fails.

There were three windows in Cloud's bunker, all lined up against one wall and hardly taller than his two hands. These windows were on the east side of Shinra and therefore managed to get some of the first rays of the sun.

Cloud's bed was never hit with sunlight though because the windows had been blocked with newspaper and magazine pages for all the kids who liked to sleep in. But as the room warmed and the color drifted along the far wall, his senses became alert and he began to wake. It had been this way almost all his life after AVALANCHE, and these days back in Shinra were no different. It was still annoying though sometimes, particularly on nights where he didn't sleep well. Sometimes his dreams were interrupted with violent memories, and others were just the passive images of floating in an oversized test tube, too numb to feel anything. He didn't know why it fluctuated, but he was thankful to get some form of restful sleep sometimes.

He rolled off the bed and smoothly on to his feet in one motion. He never felt fully awake just after getting up, but he could function well enough until his body got moving. He rubbed his eyes to rid the grogginess and ran a hand through his disheveled hair. He moved away from the bed, carefully and quietly shifting clothing and various objects that his roommates had tossed about, to clear an open space for him to warm up. It didn't take much to get a simple workout in, and hardly longer than an hour at the most.

Cloud opened up his routine in the same way he had done for the last couple of days. Only this time, he incorporated some of the stretches Zack had taught him, pushing his flexibility to its limits. To get the blood moving a bit more quickly, he punched the air several times and kicked out with each leg, his feet slicing through the beams of light slowly moving across the wall.

Satisfied and considerably more awake now, Cloud started on his strength exercises. These ones he disliked, because they were so time-consuming and frustrating, but necessary. They were often painful and reminded him distinctly of his lack of mako. That alone irritated him. The slow progress and proof of his lack of strength hurt his pride more than he liked to admit, and reminded him of how far he had to go to reach SOLDIER—and how strong he had been before.

The first one was for his abdominal muscles. These were easily some of the most important muscles in his body as many basic moves required great strength there. He laid flat on the floor on his stomach, then slowly lifted his body onto his forearms and toes. By maintaining a completely straight line with his back and buttocks, he could hold the position for forty seconds. His abs burned at the end, but he wasn't completely done.

To get a complete abdominal workout, he had to work all parts of the abs. He had to be at full capacity for anything and every muscle had to be honed. Working out his abs was a quiet reminder of Tifa too. In the early mornings as they traveled with AVALANCHE, she would do some quick sit-ups to keep her stomach tight. Every time he did them, he could imagine her next to him on the grass or dirt near the campsite, studiously counting under her breath.

Sit-ups were only the beginning of the process. Cloud did three different types of exercises, each flexing and stressing a different part of his abs. He did regular sit-ups, curling up on the floor and forcing his stomach muscles to hold up his upper body to touch his knees. It wasn't long, with only his lower back on the floor, before this position got extremely uncomfortable. Regular crunches were easier, but still painful after all the work he had already done. Reverse crunches were excruciating, but Cloud bit his lip and refused to make a sound or contort his face to show the pain.

To keep the throbbing of his complaining muscles in the back of his mind, Cloud mulled and plotted as he stared at the ceiling. Over the years, fighting on rough terrain against vicious monsters, Cloud had perfected the art of detaching his mind from his body. It came in useful even here and it would be vital in SOLDIER.

He blinked up at the ceiling, his thoughts transferring to the SOLDIER exams. He had a serious advantage with all the knowledge he had, and he needed to milk it for all it was worth. Once he was through, he'd be in SOLDIER, a step closer to Zack and Sephiroth.

Sephiroth… Cloud's already flushed face was tinted just a bit darker. That man was everything Cloud had missed. In AVALANCHE's time, the General had been like a different person—so much crueler, his very being perverted. But now, all those qualities everyone had admired and loved about the man were evident again. Like how in the office when they met he had been commanding but never callous. He was respectful to subordinates, and friendly with Zack, but there was always a clear sense of who was in charge. There was a casual power he exuded that had always made the General distinctive among the other leaders of Shinra.

And his hands. Those long, sculpted fingers, Cloud couldn't get the image out of his mind. Once before they'd been covered in blood. With a sporadic twitch they had pointed at him, translucent white and drawn. Tense with rage, with feverish hate. Now though, they were this creamy pale color, supple and quick. He had even nails and dexterous movements. Every finger was long and contoured, a pianist's hands with infinite strength. The way Sephiroth had splayed them on the desk as he leaned forward, or pushed away his long hair, the hands had been the things that caught Cloud's attention most.

That and his eyes.

Abruptly the ceiling began to waver a bit and the pain began to register. He'd lost track of just how many reverse-crunches he'd done and his body bitterly complained. He relaxed back on to the floor, laying there on his back and clenching his eyes shut to ward off the moisture that pooled there. He wasn't sure if it was from the exercise's strain or from the thoughts of Sephiroth.

He stood, rubbing a hand along his aching belly, and moved towards his schoolbooks. Shinra required certain books to be read and many of them were thick tomes with language that most cadets couldn't even read. Some were hardly literate if they came from the slums. Cloud had no use for the books—they were tactics and swordplay basics that couldn't really be taught by reading words—but they did come in handy for his exercises.

Cloud stacked up four books, some his and some Dan's, on each hand, then lifted up each pile until his arms were level with his shoulders. After twenty seconds of this position, his muscles began to quiver with the strain, but Cloud curled his fingers around the books more securely and fought to hold them longer. This exercise was difficult, but vital. In swordplay, speed and strength in swinging the sword come not just from arm muscles. Shoulder and back muscles also play a huge part in keeping one's strikes straight and keeping one's defense up when taking the full force of a hit.

Cloud stressed more work on these muscles, as they were the ones that would also be doing a lot of heavy lifting when it came to the Buster Sword. They were some of the most important ones if he ever wanted to be good enough for SOLDIER and what he ultimately had to do.

This exercise not only tested his strength, but his balance. When he had first started it, he had occasionally dropped the books. It had only been two then, and usually his reflexes were fast enough to catch them, but there had been some near misses when somebody stirred at the sound of the book connecting with the floor. A suddenly awakened cadet, with the wrath of most teenaged boys, or a broken toe, was a great incentive to learn to do things quietly.

Cloud finished off the rest of his exercises until morning really set in and the room was beginning to fill with golden light. He started up his quiet warm down by the end. His body was shining with a light sheen of sweat and his muscles quivered from lack of rest.

He was ready for the day.

* * *

It was Friday, finally their day off, and all anyone could talk about was the parade. Dan's insistent inquires all through breakfast about where Cloud would be had grown increasingly annoying. The brown-haired cadet seemed to want confirmation of where he could meet Cloud and at exactly what time. The blond had given him vague answers and admitted that he had no idea when or even if he would show up to watch the parade. Dan pouted when Cloud's resolute answers became stiffer and his annoyance more obvious.

Reno smirked into his food as he watched the interplay. Cloud's frustration at Dan found another outlet with Reno, even if just a bit. The redhead was enjoying the conversation far too much, or at least the fact that he inadvertently was causing it. Cloud shot him a warning look. He knew the two boys weren't on the best of terms. The blond thought it was about morals or something, Reno's being so loose and Dan's so uptight. Reno just snickered at Cloud's look, flicking his gaze to Dan momentarily, then pointedly looking back at Cloud. The blond ignored it in favor of an even sharper glare.

The three sat together through breakfast, cold cereal and milk the only edible things on the food line. There wasn't much else to eat, and Reno had insisted on everyone having the brightest-colored cereal they could find. Cloud's bowl was swimming with red and blue flakes that were slowly coloring his milk a murky brown. His face didn't show it, but he was repulsed by it, and his appetite was all but gone.

Reno slurped his bowl dry then stood up. "I'll meet up with you in a second Cloud, just gotta get something." Cloud saw the way Dan's eyebrows furrowed together, and the blond knew he had noticed the way he was ignored. Cloud nodded to Reno, but didn't leave immediately. He didn't want Dan to feel too bad, so he waited until the other boy had finished off his own food, then they both headed to the hallway together.

"I'm going to see if I can get a few more hours of sleep, Cloud. Then I'll see if I can win those gloves back from O'Connell later. I lost them in a bet and he won't stop showing them off." He smiled at Cloud. "What'll you be doing?"

"Exercise. Looking around Midgar." It wasn't a lie. And it was close enough to the truth to keep Dan quiet if he heard otherwise. Dan was starting to sound like Tifa with all the questions. He'd been irritating before, but now it was so much like Tifa's crush all over again that it made things a little awkward with them sometimes. Cloud had never really gotten the hang of how to deal with Tifa then, and now it was happening again, and he still didn't know what to do.

"Alright. If you come by the parade, find me. I'm going to try to be down by the shops, including that one with all the army surplus. That bend is supposed to be a good spot to see everything." Cloud only nodded as Dan rambled a bit before finally the boy trotted down the corridor.

Cloud wasn't entirely sure why he didn't feel comfortable telling Dan where he was going. Maybe it was because Dan was more conscientious of the rules or that the boy might want to tag along in the slums, but then, Cloud didn't want Reno there with him the whole time either. Maybe it was because he could be more upfront about telling the redhead to back off. Dan was quick to make assumptions while Reno at least thought things through.

Cloud shook his head; balancing out friends here in the cadet training wasn't a priority. He had to get a decent weapon for emergencies and talk with Aeris. Some of the fog in his head might just clear up then.

The cadet barracks were an unattached building to Shinra Headquarters and one of the farthest buildings from the station. Cloud headed outside and caught sight of Reno leaning against the building, a cigarette in his mouth. He blew out some smoke and smiled brightly at the blond. "Got rid of the leech? Good. We'll take the train to the Sector 7 station, that's the only one under the plate. From there we'll have to walk."

Cloud nodded absentmindedly and walked past Reno. The sky was a shade of hazy blue like a polluted ocean, but the clouds were a light grey. The far off sounds of voices and the wind were all Cloud could hear and for a moment it was kind of peaceful. A train whistle, a curse from Reno as the boy took one last puff before tossing the butt away, and Midgar snapped back into reality.

He kept walking as the redhead jogged up to match Cloud's pace. He was dressed in some loose clothing, probably concealing weapons, while Cloud had on a simple muted-green sweater and military pants. He didn't have much clothing other than the Shinra stuff, so he had peeled off the Shinra insignia label on these pants. No one used them for training anyway—too thick and too many pockets—but they were perfect for the slums.

Speaking of the slums, Cloud turned his head slightly to peek at Reno from the corner of his eye. They were about even in height, though Reno would grow a bit lankier and taller than Cloud. The blond was wondering how exactly to get separated from Reno for a bit to pop in on Aeris. He could "get lost" and disappear on him, which probably wouldn't work knowing Reno, or just ask him if they could go their own ways for a bit. Reno might get the hint, but then he might not, or even worse he might try to tail Cloud. He could knock the guy out, but Reno was pretty quick on his feet and he knew some dirty tricks… Maybe Cloud could try and knock him out later, when he had more time, so he could learn some of Reno moves.

It didn't really matter how he got alone though, just as long as Cloud could get over to Sector 5. Aeris could be the key, and it unnerved Cloud deeply to have everything hinge on that. If she couldn't give him the answers, where would he get them?

* * *

Tickets down to Sector 7 were cheap, so they both handed the money over without too much thought. The lady at the counter gave Cloud an appraising eye, which Reno nudged him about and Cloud steadfastly ignored. 10 Gil was nothing to get down there, but getting back up was another matter. Shinra IDs were usually necessary, and it cost about 50 Gil for one ticket, an exorbitant price below the plate.

The train was already in the station so they boarded immediately. Only the last two cars stopped at the Sector 7 station, so Cloud and Reno had to walk to the back of the train. These last compartments had only a handful of people in them, mostly maintenance workers for Shinra who couldn't afford to live above the plate. They stared a bit at the two teens, but looked away when Cloud met theirs eyes with a glare. Reno just ignored them. The redhead looked like he belonged on that dirty train, more than he did on the Shinra compound.

The two cadets took their seats. Many of the cushions and backs of the seats had jagged rips in them most likely from bored passengers and aggressive teens. The fluff was smattered on the raggedy carpet along with wads of chewing gum, old flyers, pencils, straws, and coffee stains. The smell of the entire compartment was like the cadet locker room: sweaty, with the stink of urine and musk mixing in. The cracked lights above them flickered often, and Cloud winced at the horrible shuttering and screeching as the wheels ran along the tracks.

The ride was relatively short and for that Cloud was thankful. He had never ridden in the last car; in fact he usually ended up either on top of the train or fighting through the cars. He was glad for it, especially now that he had the dubious pleasure of being a normal passenger.

He and Reno were two of about ten people coming off the train at the station, but a number of people got on. A flood gate of older men and women along with a couple of the younger children forced their way through the doors, pushing aside the people coming out. They probably hoped to see the parade in all its glory while they had a chance to find a spot to watch.

Cloud watched them go, children's faces full of excitement. When he was younger he would have given anything to see Sephiroth in person, but now, after all he had seen the thought of this farce of a parade made him rather sick. Ostensibly it was to celebrate those who had died in the war, but Shinra had turned it into a propaganda machine.

Reno nudged Cloud as the whistle sounded and the train began to chug away. The two boys stood on the platform of the train station watching it go. The station was really just a strip of concrete maybe twenty feet long at its widest, only long enough for two train cars to stop at. As soon as the train was out of sight, but boys turned and began to walk.

The first thing Cloud noticed was the lighting. Only under the plate was there a perpetual shadow unbroken by daylight. The very air sucked the energy out of people, and it was a fight to keep moving and just living. There was always a bit of the stench of garbage and sweat that tended to catch at the back of the throat.

Aeris and her flowers were the most obvious exception. When Cloud had lived down here—even just briefly before he joined up with Barret and his group—he had searched for anything that represented something better, something to help him. He had spent those first weeks struggling to put together what had happened from the labs and what was him and what was Zack. Still, Aeris had been one of those good things that made the gloom more bearable. The only way to live down here was through those small solaces. Cloud wondered briefly what kinds of things had kept Reno going.

Reno suddenly pointed over Cloud to their left, jarring the blond from his thoughts. Reno's body language betrayed his confidence in this atmosphere, the surety of his walk and mannerisms. Reno clearly felt at home in these surroundings, in a place he knew like the back of his hand. Cloud felt a little sad about it. There was no place like that for him. Cloud could barely remember his childhood in Nibelheim now, and what he did was marred by bullying, ostracism, and later the bridge incident. After torture at Hojo's hands and complete displacement from his past, nowhere could really be called home.

"See that way?" Reno's finger indicated a track of broken train rails that led through a wall and into darkness. "It's to the train graveyard. There's some low level monsters wandering around there, but you shouldn't go in. People get lost real easy in there and there's more dangerous parts farther in." Cloud knew what a maze the place was and nodded to Reno. He remembered fighting through there before.

They headed out on their right towards Sector 7, a hastily scrawled sign pointing the way. Cloud recalled the old Sector 7 distinctly. He looked around a lot as they entered, taking in the surroundings and the slight variations from how he remembered it. It was surreal, but also strangely nice to be in a familiar place he could remember well. Things weren't quite the same though, and he simple couldn't relax. Barret's hideout had been here along with Tifa's bar, Seventh Heaven. The building looked a little more rundown, but he figured that a business as filled with life as Tifa's had helped to spruce the place up. Right now it was an old hair salon, with a sallow-faced woman in the window.

As Cloud and Reno kept walking, Cloud could see where garbage and trash were the foundations of walls and roofs for people who lived here. The slums in this area were a shantytown, held together with bubble gum, string, and desperate prayers. Concrete beams that had been thrown away from the plate were what held up buildings and ceilings. Old signs considered obsolete on the plate and unclear advertisements were fastened together to make walls. Slabs of old cardboard and aluminum were stacked up to cover people's heads. Wires and plumbing climbed the walls of the buildings like vines.

They walked on a dirt-caked ground that children's bare feet left small indents in. A group of people were gathered by a well not far off, probably the only source of water for this area. The irony in using such an old-fashioned device in such a modern place wasn't lost on Cloud. He saw the tattered clothes people wore, the darkened eyes and sunken cheers of their faces. Children stepped and danced around broken beer bottles and the smashed remains of kitchen crotchety. Some houses didn't even have doors, their haggard and broken lifestyles spilling out into the street.

It was a sharp contrast from the life that would blossom after Meteor. There wasn't any inspirational graffiti, no colorful drapes or curtains, no welcome mats at doorsteps or plant life to speak of. After Meteor, the one good thing was that people came together and fought the problems that had plagued the city, letting the community flourish.

As they passed a particularly large pile of garbage on the outskirts of town, Cloud's nose automatically wrinkled from the stench. For once he was glad not to have mako enhancements—if he thought it was strong now he couldn't imagine how a SOLDIER would find it.

Reno laughed outright at the look on Cloud's face. "You'll get used to the smell. It's not this bad in more populated areas, but Sector 7 and Sector 5 have some of the worst slums." Reno looked around for only a moment before walking down the main path that wound around three main buildings and numerous smaller ones. One of the biggest, along with a three-story apartment complex and a small hut that sat right on the road, was Barret's hideout. Now it was just a large house for a group of people. Some people lingered about, but they only gave Reno and Cloud a curious look before turning away.

As Cloud stared at the evidence of Shinra's greed, sparks of anger began to light inside him. So few people came down to the slums anymore, all they imagined was the life of Shinra on the plate. The world down here was how the other half lived and it was repulsive. How could anyone live with themselves for letting it fester this way?

Cloud kicked at the ground, the anger building and climbing inside him as he stared around and breathed in the odor of degenerated life. One day, somewhere in the future, he'd have a nice chat with Rufus when this was all over. He'd make sure he knew to what extent of filth these people lived in and that Cloud expected him to fix it.

Reno put a hand on one of Cloud's tightly clenched fists. He hadn't realized the blond would be so affected. While Reno would normally would be thinking along the lines of "too little too late", he remembered that Cloud came from a small mountain town—poverty in a town of 250 is very different than poverty in the biggest city in the world.

"Come on, things'll be brighter once we get to some of the livelier sectors. This one is pretty bad." Reno directed with his head to the exit, marked by a wired fence covered with warnings and no trespassing signs. Cloud watched for a moment as Reno walked away. His red hair was the brightest thing here.


	9. The Back Market

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sephiroth goes to the parade while Reno shows Cloud a good time in Wall Market.

The hot spray of the shower sizzled and writhed above his head in steam. Reveling in the feeling of both the heat and cold, Sephiroth leaned back against the cool tiles, comfortable in his nudity. He flicked his hair from his face before looking into his reflection in the glass. He wiped the fog away to get a better look at himself.

_Demon…_

He stared at the image, his eyes roving critically over the muscle definition that came from a life spent training to be in peak condition, the sheer expanse of pale skin unmarked, no scars a warrior could be proud of. Proof of the genetic meddling that had created the closest thing to a perfect warrior science was capable of.

_Monster…_

He looked away sharply, letting his wet hair hang in front of his face and block the view of his profile.

Sephiroth let out another long breath, enjoying the steady thrum of the water as it struck the top of his head. He could forget about all the terrible acts he had committed, the murders, the painful childhood. Mendacity soothed the ravaged beast.

Today was the parade, and he hoped to postpone the nightmare just a little bit longer. It was worse than battle because it was something he couldn't fight back against. He could deny Shinra and their propaganda by refusing to go—always a tempting thought—but the drawbacks would be sharp, not the least of which was that his SOLDIERs would still be out there, even if the General refused to show. If they had to be there, then Sephiroth would suffer through it with them.

As the water continued to pound, Sephiroth's hair turned a steely gray color and clung to the corded muscles of his back and wrapped around the tense strength of his arms. It was quite heavy and constrictive, and often more a pain than a blessing, but Sephiroth didn't want to cut it. His long hair was one of the few vanities he maintained. Not only did it anger Hojo at the absurd length, but it was also something Sephiroth spent time caring for, not killing. The feeling of the slick conditioner, sliding over his scalp, and the routine meditation of combing it at night was worth any aggravation over the length.

Sephiroth pulled away from the wall and stepped more fully under the spray, slowing peeling the hair twisted around him to throw it all behind him, closing his eyes. He didn't think he could possibly stay sane at the parade. All the people would be shouting and cheering, his men marching in time, each step and yell blaringly loud in his ears. Then to stand there at the podium with the President swelling with pride like a balloon about to burst… Though he wouldn't mind slaughtering most of the Shinra executives, he could hardly afford to lose all control in such a crowd.

The stress was already beginning to catch up with him, he realized, and he tried to push the thoughts away. He looked through the shower's glass wall to his uniform. It was a fine white silk with heavy shoulder ornaments, stripes in red and pins decorating it. The whole ensemble looked absolutely ridiculous, and he glared fiercely at it as it hung on the large bathroom's door.

Sephiroth tipped his head back and willed away the aggression, but thoughts of the parade made him tense, even angry. He had barely thirty minutes before he needed to round up the SOLDIERs and lead them out, and that left few ways to burn off this energy.

Sephiroth glanced down, contemplating. He didn't really have time, unless he wanted something quick. He preferred more time, not one to do something by haves, but sometimes it was necessary, and at least it would take the edge off.

The muscles in his stomach clenched as he wrapped his strong fingers around his hardening length, beginning to pump slowly, twisting his wrist, thumb rubbing the head just right. He never had one lover long enough who knew what he liked, but he could imagine.

Smaller hands, gentle but firm, calloused, and a lean body that pressed up against his chest, he could feel his nipples harden as he imagined a soft breath exhaled against them. He stepped back until he could lean against the wall, letting the hand that touched him quicken.

He could almost envision his lover. Male, his lover had always been male. Sephiroth didn't think he could stand condemning someone to a life as a monster, especially his own child. He focused on the ripple of muscle in his imagined love, the way his mouth would open wide in arousal, eyes glazed. He'd have a lithe body, compacted strength, satiny soft neck, and some of the wildest cries and pleads that had to be wrung out but were worth the effort.

His hand moved faster as he imagined the warm, gripping heat and the tight shoulders just at the level of his mouth. His lover would gasp, beg him for more, every time Sephiroth cupped and stroked him he'd buck and beg. How he could kiss sweet lips, devour him whole, nip and bite him until he bled. Until his lover knew who he belonged to.

The heat in his belly began to spread, his abs defined at the exertion. The building pressure mounted as the constant thrumming of the water hit his chest and shoulders. He rocked himself into his hand, almost reaching out to caress the fine bottom he imagined himself inside, maybe red from a spank, and so tight and hot. He wanted to pull his lover back against him, make him arch against him, whisper something dirty in ear, bite the beautiful flesh and let it be known he was no one's but Sephiroth's. He didn't stop as his hips left the cool wall for a moment, then slammed back into it again. The feeling was so intense, so brilliant he repeated the action again and again.

He let out a sharp breath as he climaxed powerfully, all his muscles tensing then relaxing, suspended for a moment like a Greek statue caught in an instant of ecstasy. He wanted to lean forward and rest his forehead against the soft shoulder, feel the shaking body tremble and turn into him, lean on him and hold him and enjoy the afterglow in bliss with his lover. Just as Sephiroth blinked and shoot the hair free from his face, he could almost imagine the blue eyes that peaked over their shoulder up at him.

* * *

"Let me tell you about the slums since I doubt you know too much, mountain boy." Reno barked and laughed a bit, but Cloud didn't crack a smile. "There's eight sectors, an' each has a reactor in it. Some reactors are bigger than others. A huge wall, then a reactor, then another wall divide sectors. Sometimes, if the reactor is small enough, people build in the open area there. They don't build houses though, 'cause some kids have popped out wrong—you know, missing arms and three eyes and stuff." Cloud ignored the blatant exaggeration of mako-influenced birth defects. "Usually it's just markets and the red light district and stuff. The train graveyard is like that. So is Wall Market. It's not properly controlled by Shinra, so things get a little wild." Reno smirked at that.

"The rest of the Sectors are essentially slums where the people live. A lot of them look like Sector 7, some are better though, but Sector 7 is quieter than most. If you get caught wandering around, oh, Sector 3, you'll get robbed at the drop of a hat," he continued.

Cloud remembered most of this and just followed Reno as they walked. Reno explained as they moved how they were going to get to Wall Market, where he had some friends who could get him an inexpensive but good weapon. "Wall Market is between Sector 6 and 7, but you can't access it from this side of the slums. We're gonna go through Sector 6 part of the way, then there's a gate in the wall where Wall Market will be."

When Cloud had been in Midgar, before Meteor struck and turned the remains into Edge, Sector 6 had mostly been a pile of rubble. He and AVALANCHE had blown up the Sector 5 reactor, and it had toppled and destroyed most of Sector 6. Now, the place was a little brighter, with some better houses that looked to have a logical construction. It was evidence of how close Wall Market was because the better homes were around it.

As they walked up the main road up to the market, Reno expertly weaved through the people while Cloud followed a little more carefully. A kid up ahead of Reno and Cloud was also making his way through the crowd. He looked nonchalant, though he fought against the tide of people as he cut through the road. Reno spied the quick hand that nabbed a fancy pin off a woman's shirt: Pickpocket. Reno smirked. The kid was clearly relatively new to the job, because that lady had a bag with some expensive looking make-up that would have reeled in more cash than a pin.

The redhead glanced at Cloud, noting his outfit. He blended in better than most people from outside Midgar, but the way his eyes moved over the buildings and people revealed how new the place was. If the pickpocket were smart, he would probably notice it then make a snatch for Cloud's pocket. Reno slipped between two women in front of Cloud, effectively catching the pickpocket as he made to go around, eyes only on his next target, and dragged him off to the side of the road.

"Don't get caught next time." Reno flashed the kid a cocky smirk, his grip on the boy's wrist a little too tight. The kid's bright brown eyes narrowed in a glare at Reno's own green. Still he didn't argue with the older boy, likely knowing that he was being let off easy. The redhead shoved him away, almost knocking the kid over as he fell into an older woman.

Cloud watched in silence, and Reno turned his head slightly to look out of the corner of his eye at him. The blond just looked at Reno, and the redhead shrugged at the lack of outward response to the incident. He filed it away though, because surely a small-town boy had never dealt with a pickpocket.

They kept walking, and eventually Cloud spotted a familiar playground set off to the side. The blond faltered just a half step as he looked at it, remembering his run-in here with Tifa so long ago and how empty and abandoned the place had been. All these people had probably died when the reactor fell, he thought suddenly. He was a little shocked to realize he hadn't even considered it. He had become wrapped up in his world and how it changed, let alone the changes that affected the unknown faces around the planet, like the ones he saw now. No one had warned the people here, no one counted the dead, he had never known or even conceived of how many people lived in this hellhole before.

Past the playground was the opening to Wall Market. As soon as they escaped the crush Cloud was able to take in the sight of Wall Market again. At least on the surface it hadn't changed much from how he remembered. Tons of shops and stores were lit with bright lights, customers crowded around the wares and shopkeepers shouting prices and exchanging money. The odor of garbage was hidden behind the smell of spices, cooking food, and cheap perfume. There was color everywhere in the clothes, the hair, and the shops, starkly different from the gunmetal gray above the plate. Voices were everywhere too, arguing prices, calling for friends and children, and hawking wares. It was like all the life and color of the slums was gathered in one place.

Reno was practically beaming as bright as the neon lights of the inn off to their left. Cloud thought the redhead looked rather funny with that idiotic grin on his face, but he didn't comment. "Welcome to Wall Market." Reno grinned and slapped him on the back. "Let's get going. Up ahead is a weapons shop my friend runs. He'll get us some stuff he doesn't sell normally." Reno actually sounded gleeful. Cloud remembered that this was where Reno had grown up—the plate must seem an alien place in comparison.

Cloud and Reno made their way up the street, sometimes fighting against the crowds. It was chaotic, and Cloud more than once had to watch his pockets from being picked. Reno had no problem slapping people's hands if the drifted too close. Cloud, a little unnerved at the proximity of the people and still new to the idea that someone would even attempt to rob him, stepped out of their reach if they came too close. It was like a dance, as he sidestepped them and moved, making it discreet as possible. Reno's annoyed shout as the same kid came back twice was anything but. AVALANCHE before hadn't had any problem with thieves—Barret and his gun arm was frightening enough to give them a ten-foot radius, and one flash of mako-glowing eyes got you a wide berth.

They broke into the next area where there was a gap in the crowds. It was a little calmer here, with mostly men loitering about and arguing with each other. The local gym was closest to them, a little cardboard cutout in the wall, where loud music and cheering shouts along with bet calls were heard. Cloud shuddered a bit as he remembered "Big Bro", the gym owner, who was a little too enthusiastic about cross-dressing. Cloud said a quick prayer to the Planet that no one he knew in this timeline would ever find out about that little incident. Farther up ahead was a tavern, where softer music played and smoke wafted out of the door. Men stood outside, lighting up and joking with each other.

Reno pointed to the building across from the tavern. "That's the shop we're gonna hit. They have a backroom full of stuff you can't find anywhere else except from corrupt Shinra officials." Reno laughed again as they headed towards it.

The weapons shop was ordinary as he stepped in. The main room was open, with one shelf right in the center with a variety of rounded weapons and shields sitting on it. There was a barrel full of small projectiles, the way some stores had barrels of candy, and some sharpening tools were resting on the floor by the wall. The rest of the display lined the walls and climbed to the ceiling. Cloud was vaguely surprised that the thin walls could even hold that much weight. Though given how predominate weapons were under the plate, the owner probably did good business down here.

The man at the counter wore a grimy shirt that may have been white once, with a shock of black hair on his head. He grinned widely, revealing two missing teeth, and promptly jumped over the counter in a quick move to greet Reno.

"Red! Yer back! Shinra hasn't poisoned ya yet I see. Must mean they like ya. You here for somethin' special?" Reno laughed brightly as both slapped five before tensing their biceps like they were going to arm wrestle. It must have been some kind of secret handshake. They caught up for only a moment, Cloud hanging back behind Reno scoping out the shop. Reno seemed to remember he was there fairly quickly though.

The redhead gave the man a bright grin. "Yeah Chip. This is Cloud, fellow cadet who needs a little somethin'." Cloud noticed that Reno's slang had suddenly gotten a lot heavier, his accent much thicker. "He's a sword guy, so anythin' with a blade should do. No guns for you Cloud?"

"No."

The owner grinned again, and winked at Reno when he thought Cloud wasn't looking. "Then you'll wanna come this way boys. Got some special stuff in you might just like."

The backroom was impressive. Automatic pistols were in a box on the floor, the ammo piled up right next to them. Shotguns that had already been neatly sawed off were leaning against the wall. Variations on military rifles, upgraded barrels, infrared and x-ray scopes, dangerous poisonous and acidic bullets, and ones that shattered on contact filled up crates all over the room. Some of the rarer and more expensive weapons were back here along with the illegal ones. Scimitars and wickedly curved blades, scythes and axes, rods that unsheathed to be swords, and maces and spears decorated the walls and hung from the ceiling. Behind the crates there was a small work area where Cloud assumed the owner fixed broken weapons. Various parts of a rifle were there, scattered along with jars of oil and several old rags covered in grease.

"We got somethin' for everyone. See anythin' you like, Blon–?" Cloud cut him off before he could finish.

"I know what I need."

There was something a little unnerving in Cloud's gaze, as he glanced over at the proprietor. Zack called Cloud 'Blondie', but it was all in good fun. Cloud didn't really like that nickname coming from anyone else though.

"I need something small that I can slip through security and carry around. Daggers, boot blades, shuriken, something of that nature." Cloud watched the man closely. People who ran businesses like this could be very dangerous and the guy might rip him off, even with Reno's watchful eye.

"We've got some right good daggers if you're interested." The guy rearranged his poker face and scurried over to one wall, pulling down a couple of sheathed daggers. Some were more like small knives, hardly longer than Cloud's extended hand, while others were longer than his forearm. The quality wasn't too bad; at least the weight was even.

Reno watched Cloud silently; surprised by the way Cloud handled himself. Reno hadn't expected a mountain boy to be so confident in this environment. He knew what he was looking for, and it was slightly intimidating to see him like this. He definitely wouldn't be seriously ripped off now.

Cloud moved forward and picked one of the longer ones up. It was a dagger with a double-edged blade, made for stabbing and thrusting. They were best as secondary weapons, but incredibly useful in close range fighting. This one was poor quality though, and sported a stub tang. Those tended to shatter and Cloud discarded it with a brief look.

Cloud picked up several others as Chip looked on. Reno, bored and ignored, wandered about the room examining some of the uncommon weapons. He admired the artwork on some Wutain katana and even inspected some hand bombs, but his eyes alighted on a small rod.

"Hey, Chip. That thing extend or what?" The owner moved to the other side of the room to explain the weapon Reno was pointing out. Cloud only gave them a quick glance, recognizing the item as crude looking Nightstick. Figures. Clearly it was fate, the inevitable love Reno had for that particular weapon. Cloud had been hit one too many times by that thing though to feel anything less than distaste for it.

The man looked away for too long and Cloud deftly slipped one of the smaller daggers into his waistband. He didn't feel too much guilt over it, the guy had tons more in another crate, and Cloud knew his priorities were more important than emotions right now. It never hurt to be prepared, and he could really only afford one weapon. He lifted the one in his hand to the light. It wasn't really a dagger, more of gladius really. Unlike daggers, gladii were short swords that could be used for cutting like a regular sword. It was useful, and could even be used as a main weapon until Cloud could get a hold of a real sword. They were small enough too that it could fit in a shopping bag or a backpack. He paid for the purchase with most of his meager savings, and Reno even managed to secure him a small discount.

The price was still a little higher than Cloud expected, especially for a dagger. He couldn't really complain, since this guy did have higher quality stuff, but any remaining guilt over the stolen dagger disappeared. They left the store soon after, Cloud carrying a nondescript brown paper bag. Inside were the gladius and its sheath. The licensing rule about purchasing weapons was only followed if you bought from the front room, Reno explained, so Cloud could literally walk out without signing a thing. There also wasn't much risk of the meager security force under the plate ever asking questions—they had a lot bigger things on their plate than one knife purchase.

As they walked, Reno got to talking about the various weapons he'd seen in use, mostly gun varieties, but he was quite excited by the nightstick, which was amusing to Cloud. "See, a nightstick is different—not just like any old staff. It has an electric charge going through it. So when you hit 'em, you shock 'em too."

Cloud nodded along, but he didn't really bother to hide his distaste for the nightstick. When you got hit by it as many times as he had, it was hard to like it. "You should just get a mace if you want to smack people over the head with a weapon. At least you can draw blood."

"Welts man. And you can't shock people with maces. Not to mention they're really heavy and not subtle at all. Not exactly my style."

"Subtle works, but in a tight spot those big weapons'll save your life. There are plenty of monsters that are big enough a gladius would barely make a scratch."

Reno shook his head, rat-tail hair whipping around to lie against his front shoulder. "There's subtle, there's conspicuous, and then there's ridiculous. Have you _seen_ the sword your SOLDIER guy carries? That's got to be at least five hundred pounds! That sword's maybe three times as wide as a regular sword—how is that logical to use?" Reno waved his arms about as he spoke, excited by an argument.

"It ends the fight before it even starts sometimes," Cloud said, shrugging before tacking on—"that's what Zack said. One swing of a buster sword will take down a really large monster. And it handles somewhere between a broadsword and a claymore."

The banter continued good-naturedly as they headed back into the main area of Wall Market. Cloud's knowledge on weapons was extraordinary, though he made sure to try to make references sound book-like rather than from experience. He couldn't exactly pin everything on Zack when he'd only "known" the First for a week.

Reno guided them into a restaurant and sat them down. The chairs on the inside were mostly stools, probably stolen from the bar up the street. Someone in the store had wised up though and chained them to the counter. The ones outside, like the ones Reno and Cloud were sitting on, seemed to be of all assortments. Reno had managed to nab what looked like a school desk's chair minus the desk, while Cloud got a legitimate wooden one. A man a couple feet away from them was seated on a lawn chair. Reno murmured something about only ordering canned drinks, and Cloud nodded his head without really thinking about it.

They talked for a while after ordering their food, Cloud making a point of asking for bottled water. Reno got a soda. The redhead moved the topic of weaponry off blades to guns, which he was more familiar with. Much to Cloud's surprise, Reno mentioned a triple-barreled gun he'd heard about on the street. "Man, I'd love to shoot that thing. What a beaut." Cloud unwittingly thought of Vincent's massive Cerberus gun, complete with engraved triple-barrel. The blond wasn't sure if Reno had seen the famous gun in the past, but it was an amusing thought.

Their seats were outside the restaurant, away from the crowds at the counter and booths, and in the little open area fenced in around it. They could watch the people rushing by and rest their legs. Cloud didn't admit it, but he was a little tired. All those exercises in the morning combined with all this unceasing walking was getting to him. Cloud's mouth tightened a little with displeasure as his mind automatically jumped to the advantages of mako, and instead he focused on back on the conversation.

The food came, and Reno crowed with relief as he put the first bite in his mouth. Cloud followed suit, but had enough self-restraint not to sigh blissfully the way Reno did. The food, though not as good as Tifa's, was heavenly in comparison to Shinra's gruel: soft, well-cooked chicken, flaky and perfect fries, green beans that were actually green, and all of it tasted amazing. Cloud savored each bite.

Both cadets visibly relaxed even more as they ate. Reno started up with a story about some adventure he had, how he tricked some goons after him into thinking the red thing up on the roof was a cat. They both laughed at Reno's imitation of a cat's meow, even hissing at some poor kid walking by. As Reno's story closed up, Cloud tried to think of something he could share. He didn't have too many good stories though, and the first one that came to mind was Corneo's and the cross-dressing experience. Cloud swore he'd never tell a soul that story, so he tried to think up a new one.

"Well, a mercenary who came to Nibelheim once told me this one. He came down from the mountain, and had cut through a forest to get there. He said there'd been a ninja with a wild battle cry and…"

Reno snorted loudly at Cloud's description of Yuffie, the "mysterious ninja", who robbed this guy blind of his materia. The way Reno laughed and his easy grin erased any inkling that he might have been suspicious of the story. Cloud was able to warm up to a bit. He still remembered yelling across that field at Yuffie, still so young and so erratic. She'd turned out to be incredibly loyal and a valuable member of the group, but he'd had his doubts at first.

The pleasant lull in the conversation abruptly ended when Cloud noticed the crowds on the street were getting agitated. He sat up pretty fast when he spotted the group coming down the street. They didn't even try to hide the fact that they were armed, and walked proudly through. The whispers of "AVALANCHE" that followed them said enough. They passed by without a second glance at anyone in the crowd, but Cloud felt himself go hot and cold inside.

Even though being a cadet was a little like being in a bubble, the world was still moving outside. Hojo was still running his grotesque experiments, and AVALANCHE was still very active and quite violent. Cloud remembered hearing about Elfé, the previous leader. Even if they had never met, Barret had held her in high regard.

AVALANCHE had been a far more organized group under Elfé, almost like a miniature and unstable SOLDIER. They actually paralleled an awful lot, now that Cloud considered it. The main scientist, Fuhito, had mindless, powerful minions who were the blunt force for much of AVALANCHE's activities, along with a lot of cannon fodder recruits. Barret had never agreed with Fuhito, and so the moment Elfé and her closest fighters died, Barret had made sure Fuhito was out of the picture. This, Cloud discovered later, was not just out of cold blood, but also for revenge for the deceased Elfé.

This violent and barely-controlled AVALANCHE was still alive and running at this point in time. The AVALANCHE led by Barret and then by Cloud would not really form until after Sephiroth's disappearance and Cloud and Zack's incarceration by Hojo—well after this AVALANCHE collapsed. If Cloud diverted from the timeline as planned and saved Sephiroth's sanity, than the AVALANCHE he would later lead would never exist.

The thought was quite unsettling. Cloud knew the camaraderie of AVALANCHE was not worth the price of saving Sephiroth. Their lives would be better off not being a part of AVALANCHE, he told himself. He wasn't sure if he was convinced though.

Reno snapped his fingers in front of Cloud's glazed face. "You okay man? I've seen some of those guys around before and they're trouble. I'm sure you know what I'm talkin' about. You'd best steer clear of 'em."

Reno's wise words brought Cloud back. AVALANCHE now wasn't his problem. SOLDIER would quell anything they did, and they had no real part in the Jenova and Sephiroth issues. Cloud let out a breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding. He needed to focus on SOLDIER and Sephiroth, and let Zack and the others worry about AVALANCHE.

Reno and Cloud finished up lunch and wandered around Wall Market. They had popped their heads into a variety to stores, but hadn't bought anything. Neither really had the Gil for it, especially if they wanted to go home.

Cloud was brainstorming ways to separate himself from Reno when Lady Luck dropped into his lap. Both Cloud and Reno had spotted the group of men hanging around outside a bar. They had the distinct appearance of thugs: heavy-set, muscular, loaded with poorly concealed weapons, and in general trying to look inconspicuous while being obvious about it. Reno laughed loudly at them, elbowing Cloud before realizing the men had seen them.

Cloud didn't recognize them or the symbol painted in blue on their bare arms, but the redhead must have. "I'm gonna get out of here Cloud. I'll catch up to you later. Look around, but don't get mugged all right? See ya later."

It was apparent they knew each other, because Reno took off down the nearby alley, and Cloud backed out of the way as the four men came after the redhead. Cloud was a little relieved they weren't interested in him; he really didn't need the attention. He did prepare himself to move though; Reno might need backup if things got nasty. Cloud watched in surprise though as Reno took a running leap and managed to grab the top of the wall. In one motion he hefted his whole body on top of it, then much to Cloud's amazement, jumped to the roof next to it. The four thugs at the bottom began to try a fireman's lift to reach the redhead.

Reno taunted them a bit longer while on the roof, shaking his butt at them and making faces and yelling rude remarks. Incensed, the men worked faster, but Reno took off with a serious head start.

The redhead was fluid at he leapt and ran along the rooftops. Nimble, and with a lot of practice, he was easily able to maneuver over and through obstacles in his way, propelling himself with his momentum. At the end of Wall Market, however, the wall that rose to the plate began. Cloud watched him with rapt attention, taking in everything as Reno moved, tailing him by ground. Cloud had done a lot of chasing and running in his life, and he'd never seen something like this.

_When the hell did Reno learn that?_

Far behind Reno on the roofs Cloud could see the thugs, just two of them, clambering slowly and clumsily across the shops. They'd never catch up to Reno as the redhead made an amazing long jump and took off deeper into the slums.

It took Cloud a moment to realize he was now alone. Reno had run off into the next sector, and would presumably double back, but likely he'd wait a bit before risking being spotted a second time. Cloud knew this was the only chance he'd get: time to head to the church in Sector 5.


	10. The Best Heroes are Tragic

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cloud meets Aeris and makes a deal with Reno.

The worn steeple of the church stood tall amidst the rubble of the slums, an emblem of a Midgar long gone. The roughly hewn stones were cracked and dirty but still standing, broken in places but unbending under the weight of the years. Cloud stood in the deep shadow cast by the flying buttress at the front of the church taking it in, feeling his heart brimming with unsaid emotion. Nostalgia choked him for just a moment, reminding him of the peaceful days he had lived here in the comfort of Aeris' memory and her beloved flowers.

A part of his soul floundered in agony though as he stared up at the two towers, one broken one not, aching. This place was a sanctuary, an untouched haven, like a painting in his memory. It brought feelings of relief and worry to his heart. Dare he touch it, reach out and potentially shatter the image, and if he did, would it be ransacked?

Flowerless?

Or would it still be the place of his reprieve, the answer to the voiceless questions and pleas he pitted to the Planet? What if she wasn't there or she didn't remember him? Could he take the confused expression, the polite smile and the way she might watch him warily like he was deranged? Could he put himself in that position?

Cloud gritted his teeth, overcome by doubt and annoyed by it. He couldn't prepare for this meeting and had no idea what to expect and it made him unaccountably nervous. No matter how many questions he had, he had to do this; he had to know.

He strode up to the heavy front door and paused, trying to hold on to the hope that things would work in his favor despite the clamoring fears. He traced just his fingertips along the wall, the barest of touches. "Optimism is the foundation of courage," he murmured to himself. Vincent might have smirked as he said it, as if he didn't quite believe in his own words, but Cloud knew it meant something.

One of the thick wooden doors was ajar and quite heavy when the blond pushed it open, and he marveled at how much more effort it took. He couldn't remember it ever being so difficult. The grinding sound of wood on stone echoed through the building as Cloud took a step inside, leaving the door open behind him. No one lived around here. For some reason this place had been spared from the ravaging of the slums. Aeris' church was like its own sanctuary in Midgar, so different than the rest of the city. There was a peace that settled there, delicate like the wings of a bird, but protective.

There was no one inside the main room, though it was obviously not abandoned since the ground was swept and the air was fresh. The roof still had the same missing boards where streams of sunlight made the dust dance. Cloud tentatively put his hand out into one of the beams near him, his lips curving into a brief smile as his hand began to warm. It was a small reminder of how this place had once been bathed in sunlight; the way Cloud remembered it after Meteor.

The flowers were in their same spot, growing next to the wooden pews and climbing up the wall like ivy. The whites and yellows of the blossoms were illuminated softly as they turned their faces to the sun. Cloud walked through the pews to the miniature field of flowers, admiring the bright colors, the vibrancy that brought this church to life. Some had creeping patches of brown from age, other looked back up at him, fresh and young. Carefully, almost afraid to hurt them with his heavy boots, he stepped into the patch. The flowers seemed to crowd around his feet, the dirt invisible under all their petticoats of petals. Cloud stood there in the flowers, admiring the way the light and shadows teased each other, until a shadow of a woman stood next to his own.

"Hello." Her quiet presence had always been with him, but to now feel her standing so close to him was almost overwhelming. Cloud had wanted this so badly, needed to know that she was there, still the Aeris he remembered, forgiving, welcoming, and compassionate. He did not turn, did not react immediately, just waited for the dream to break apart and shatter.

"Um…is everything alright?" Her soft hand reached for his shoulder, resting there carefully. Cloud could feel her fingers curling into the material and knew how the pads were delicate and soft like her flowers, the nails clean despite the gardening work, and he could feel the fragility in her grip. He turned slowly until Aeris' green eyes met his own blue.

It was the same as in the field, the same when they were in AVALANCHE, and finally after in his mind. He was both surprised and ready to see her alive. Part of him had never let her death go, even while he knew she forgave him and never blamed him. To see all of that in just a split second in her face was a little overwhelming for the blond.

"Hello." Cloud's voice was a little rougher than he intended, but she still smiled at him all the same. He could feel a little color rising to his cheeks as she curled her lips up like that with just the hint of her teeth showing. He didn't have the faintest idea what to say. Every question he intended to ask, all the confusion, it seemed to have fled the moment she touched him.

"Would you like to buy a flower? It's only a Gil." Her hand was still on his shoulder, friendly, almost motherly. He relaxed his muscles under his hand, letting the tenseness flow away.

Aeris was as beautiful as he remembered and he could hardly believe that she was there before him. Her pink dress was faded to a warm hue, spots of it thin and washed out from being worn so often. Her boots were stained with dirt from walking in the mud outside, and the laces were worn and broken. Her brown hair was full of curls, as if a child's nimble fingers had twisted them, and her eyes were warm. She was the epitome of innocence, of simple joy and good things.

Cloud, to his horror, could feel a sharp burning behind his eyes. It had been so long and now, looking upon her lovely face, he could hardly conceive how he ever went on after her death, how he could ever be forgiven for letting her die.

Her beautiful face turned down into a concerned frown. "Are you alright? Do you need to sit down, Cloud?" Her voice was gentle as he let himself be guided into the pew behind them. Before his feet the flowers unrolled like a living carpet, and he found himself staring hard at the gentle swaying of the petals as he fought back tears. He shook his head when Aeris asked if he wanted any water.

She closed her smaller hands around his and he looked up again. Her smile was radiant and pleased. "I'm so glad you've come, Cloud."

Her happiness was contagious and he could feel his lips twitching up into a soft smile in response to her own. Her laughter was like a wind chime. "Oh Cloud, there is more out there for you. The grim expression of a soldier isn't for you yet."

Confusion was the first thing that registered. She clearly knew who he was, even though in this time they had never met. But then, did she know about Sephiroth and the AVALANCHE she had been a part of? Did she know what had happened to him—what drove him, what had broken him, why he was always a soldier and nothing else?

"Aeris, I…"

She cut him off before he could say anything else. Her gentle hands squeezed his. "The Planet has to take this chance Cloud. This time things may not be so bad, not for everyone."

She looked to him eagerly as she said this, trying to impart something to him with her eyes. He stared back uncomprehendingly, the message not getting through. What was she trying to say?

Aeris shifted on the pew, using her free hand to shift her skirt a bit. He noticed the ruffled edges, how there was a small abrasion on her knee. He wondered absentmindedly where she had gotten it. Her other hand never left his. He swallowed quietly as she started again. "The Planet was sick and–"

"But the Geostigma was gone. We got rid of it," He cut in, sounding gruffer than he meant to. What was she talking about? Things were fine after Geostigma had been cleared up.

"Geostigma was gone Cloud, but that doesn't mean the Planet wasn't ill. So much evil…it clogged the Planet and there was nowhere for that kind of evil to go. The beautiful earth wouldn't be the same, and something had to be done."

Her eyes were brighter this time, wet with tears as her sentence tapered off into silence. The burning sensation behind his own had faded, but now he could feel it prickling at him again.

"The Planet sent me back in time." He meant it to be stronger; to sound surer of himself, but it came out in a whisper.

"Things are different Cloud, the future isn't set. What the Planet did was not only for itself, but for you and every life upon it."

"The Planet sent me back in time." He repeated it again, trying to wrap his mind around the inconceivable. The Planet was sick, so it sent him back in time. To stop it from becoming sick, from anything like Jenova's attack even happening. What about him, the hero of this twisted story? When did he get a rest? Or a choice?

…Or was that selfish?

He looked away for a moment, angry and confused and not sure where to direct the emotion. The sunlight was a little dimmer, the pews' wood harder and more unyielding as he sat on it. The mold on the wood and the holes in the ceiling were more visible than before. Every flower's color was paler, darker than he remembered.

She lifted his hand to her heart, holding it to her breast, trying to communicate something to him. "The future isn't set yet Cloud." Her hand tightened around his, her fingers squeezing his slightly. She leaned forward a bit into him and Cloud turned back, noting how fine her hair was, the subtle play of colors turning it from brown into a prism of chocolate hues. He was thinking abstractly, not clearly, he couldn't grasp what she was trying to say.

"What do you mean the future isn't set? If I undo what happened before, things will continue the way they should have?" It came out sounding more like a question than the intended statement.

She just continued to stare up into his eyes, imploring him to understand what she seemed unable to say. She was unnaturally still, leaning forward, trying to make the words come through with her eyes.

"Isn't that right Aeris?" He glanced away then. "Can't everything that went wrong be stopped from the beginning? Won't everything be fine then?" He could feel his voice cracking, the way his muted whisper had grown in volume, more frenzied as he spoke. What was she saying?

"No Cloud. The future isn't set," she repeated a third time. The tears began to dribble down her face, collecting on her chin then falling on their joined hands. He looked away bitterly, staring at the altar as hard as he could.

The Planet wanted him to stop Jenova. Again. He knew that. It would save Sephiroth and all those lives. Again, he knew that. He had anticipated that. But "the future wasn't set". What did that mean? Shouldn't everything be fine if he stopped the snowball of events that ended in the Planet's near-death before? Wasn't Jenova the cause of the Planet's illness? If he destroyed the monster before it could infect the world, then shouldn't that be enough? Cloud looked to her, eyes begging and desperate. Was the Planet kidding? After all he had done, for himself, the people, the world, couldn't it just be that simple?

"No Cloud." Her small voice was firm despite the tears, her hold on his hand tightened even as he tugged to try and free it. "Fate and the Planet are not intertwined. Your destiny is to be a hero, and if you don't do it the way it was done before, some other obstacle will be presented."

His shoulders were beginning to shake, and he could feel the way she held his trembling hand, how she tried to steady it even though hers shook just as much. His blood was running cold in his veins; his ears were starting to ring. Their clasped hands were the only part of the world that wasn't spinning.

_Hero…_

He couldn't go back far enough to escape the stigma, the disease of that word.

"You deserve peace; you deserve your deepest heart's desire." As she said it she moved his hand to his heart, holding it there where he could feel the erratic beating. "I'm sorry Cloud. Things will be different. I know they will be."

The hand she held to his heart clutched at hers tightly. There were so many things he wanted, so many things he had given up before that she was offering to him now. Sephiroth's image held in his mind first; then Zack's, Vincent's, her own, each flashed by him. The names on the memorial for those who died in Meteor, Marlene, Tifa, his mother, and all the people whose lives had been ripped apart.

He turned away from her, willing the tears to stay. Why was his life so messed up? He couldn't seem to live in peace long enough to make it last. Before he could pull away from her completely, she softly touched his chin, and then cupped his face in her palm.

"Cloud, you will have your rest. Lighten your heart. The moon and stars aren't always visible, but they don't leave you. The Planet won't leave you Cloud, and I won't."

Before he could protest she brought his head to her shoulder, rubbing soothing circles into his back as he fought off the overwhelming despair that so wanted to be wanted to crawl into her lap and cry, have her kiss the tears and shush him like his mother had done ages ago.

She smelled of wild flowers; of the wind in a meadow blowing gently into his face and brought the indescribably perfume of hundreds of different flowers. She smelled like the earth, the roots seeped in it, the stems climbing high, the buds and petals. He could feel the soft cotton of her dress against his cheek, the gentle slope of her shoulder. She smiled and hummed a comforting melody into his ear, but the awful sick feeling of hopelessness did not leave him. He felt as if he had swallowed something slimy and it sat in his stomach.

"I failed you before Aeris. I couldn't save you." He murmured it into her dress, but she didn't seem to have a problem hearing him.

"Silly." He could feel the playful smile bloom on her face. "I wasn't gone. And how many times have we gone over this? There's nothing to forgive."

He only shook his head into her chest before attempting to pull away. She unlocked her hands from around him after a moment and let him sit up.

"I didn't protect you, and you died, Aeris."

"No one said it was your job to protect me. Cloud, I know you feel responsible, but sometimes there isn't blame to be had. I'm alive here, isn't that what matters? Unless you're saying I'm a ghost right now." She giggled lightly, brushing his fears aside the way she might brush pollen off her dress.

He hesitated. "No, but–"

"Cloud. This is a new start; so let that baggage go. Exhale and all your guilt will float away."

She gestured with her hand for him to actually exhale, so he did. He felt a little silly, sitting there and releasing all his breath in one whoosh. He breathed in again, and the strangest sensation settled over his lungs and heart. It felt like dust, some kind of residue that had been collecting there unnoticed, had been dislodged. He rubbed his knuckles against where his heart was, reveling in the freeing feeling.

Aeris turned away from him with a smile, but didn't explain it. She stood up, smoothing out her dress, before lightly stepping into the cluster of flowers. Her boots matched the color of the dirt, and it made it seem as though she, like her flowers, had grown out of the earth. Perhaps she had. She approached the altar of the church where a weathered stone angel stood, arms upraised and face turned to heaven. "Thank you." She inclined her head to the angel and Cloud felt the breeze sweep by him as it delighted in playing with her hair for just a moment.

Aeris turned back to him. "Cloud, would you like to buy a flower?"

Cloud half-smiled before slipping off the bench and squatted before the flowers. "Yes. One please."

Aeris smiled happily. Carefully she waded through the ankle-high flowers, seeming to search for the perfect one. Gracefully she reached down towards one flower, brushing her fingers carefully over the petals before gently plucking it from the ground.

"Here you go." He handed her ten Gil before she could say anything, slipping the coins into her pocket. He cautiously took the blossom from her hand, admiring the delicate white color and how on the inside was a small ring of bright green. Two of the petals flopped over his fingers, rubbing their satiny texture against his skin.

He thanked her quietly, pinching the stem of the flower between thumb and forefinger and holding the delicate blossom carefully. She took his hand just as he turned away. "Cloud, some things need to be handled with great care."

Cloud stepped away as she released his hand, his mind turning over her words. He walked back down the aisle, her presence warm and serene against his back. He could almost feel her smile through his clothes, and just as he got to the doors he briefly looked back to smile at her.

* * *

Wall Market faded to the background of Cloud's mind as he headed back into the busy shopping center. There was a serenity he carried with him that made his mind clearer than it had ever been before. He glided around the masses of people fighting their way through the streets, his steps light and even. He felt as though he had lost twenty pounds, and if he had been a different man, he might have been smiling.

He wasn't exuberant, not the kind of happiness that made him want to shout and shake someone. It was far more powerful and deep, radiating in a part of him superficial happiness never reached. Everything around him seemed brighter: the faces of people as they walked by, the colors in the shop windows, the blinking and flashing signs. He felt like maybe he had only been partially in this world, and now the barrier had dropped. Everything had been a washed out picture before and someone had redrawn the lines of the world and made them sharper.

It wasn't a dream. Or a nightmare. It was a chance. It was far from perfect—Cloud had no desire to be a hero, because being a hero meant greater sacrifice than he might be able to stand. And Aeris hadn't said it would be _better_ , but different. It was still a chance though, a _chance_ , and he hadn't had one of those in a long time.

"There you are Cloud. Thought I lost you. I doubled back but couldn't find you. People said you left the way we came. Where'd you go?

Reno's familiar voice didn't even startle him, nor did the arm slung across his shoulders. He just turned to the redhead and waved his free arm casually behind him. "I didn't go too far. Just looking around. Where'd you go?"

Reno looked at him funny for a second, his bright green eyes—a totally different green than Aeris'—scrunched up as he gave Cloud a once over. "Just to the next sector over. I lost those guys pretty easily. You get laid or somethin'?" Cloud's posture was slacker than the redhead had ever seen. All the tenseness in his limbs had evaporated and there was even a flower in his front pocket.

"No," Cloud said quickly. The image of a man's warm skin against his own didn't disappear fast enough to escape the heating of his cheeks. "Just poked around. How did you run along the roofs like that?"

Reno looked like he didn't want to drop the subject, but after a moment he gave in and grinned. Cloud didn't look high, so it couldn't be too bad. Reno could take it in stride. "Called Parkour. It's nifty in the slums." He smirked at Cloud, a challenge evident in his voice. He knew what Cloud was going to ask.

"Will you teach it to me?"

Reno leaned back on his heels, tilting his head up to the sky as though thinking. His cockiness came back in full force. "Well… I could teach you, but what would you do for me?"

Cloud wasn't surprised at the comment. Reno only worked for himself. He could offer to show him some fighting skills. Or maybe promise to cover his back on some law-breaking venture Reno would undoubtedly go on. But what would Reno _really_ want? Reno was still grinning at him as Cloud mulled over his options. Money?

"Look Cloud, don't think on it too much. I've only got some questions."

Cloud's whole body language changed at that simple comment. Reno was surprised by the way all the relaxed muscles had stiffened, how his light-hearted appearance seemed to morph into something closer to cornered prey.

_Interesting…_

"…Questions?" Cloud's voice deepened as he repeated the word.

"Yeah. Like what the hell Shinra's doing all over Junon. Or what the General's last name is. You help me out finding that out, and I'll teach you parkour." The redhead was aiming for casual confidence but he wasn't sure if he quite pulled it off. Cloud was still… _off._ Reno had more questions than those pertaining to Shinra, but if Cloud's reaction was anything to go by, those had to be saved for later.

Cloud did relax though, but the ease he carried himself at before was lost. The veins on the back of his hands were receding back into his skin from where they'd been standing out before.

Reno heard him exhale softly. "I'm pretty sure the General doesn't have a last name. And I'll only help you on three."

Bargaining. Fine, he saw how it was.

"Five. All Shinra related."

"Three and only if they're not related to the science section. That's too dangerous." Cloud's voice momentarily changed again, his tone far harder as he spoke the last words.

_Bingo._ Reno was willing to settle for three questions for that tidbit. Cloud didn't seem to think anything of his stipulation, but the redhead was suspicious that Cloud's mind jumped to the science department before anything else. Cloud definitely had a secret, and Reno was going to find out what it was.

"Deal."


	11. Want to See it Painted Black

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's not a good day for Cloud, but luckily Zack's there.

The parade had finished two days ago, but the streamers had yet to be cleared off the streets, along with empty bottles, torn banners, and any other paraphernalia left behind. It was dark and the moon was still out as Cloud looked both ways down the paved concrete, pausing to watch the way a shred of a banner that proclaimed the General's wonder tumbled away.

There was a sense he was trespassing, but it was only because he wasn't one of the citizens of the plate—not really.

The blond stepped off the curb and crossed the street, cutting through an alleyway and into a small grove of townhouses. They looked fancy at first glance: delicately ornamented railings, finely painted shutters, gilded windowsills. Cloud had seen these before while at Shinra, but now he could see what others didn't know to look for. The way they had no flowers, the tightly locked windows, the bolted-shut doors, the pervasive anxiety and fear that settled like a rash on the minds of all the upper-crust people. They might have been better off than those underneath them, but there was no solace in their anger and despair. They couldn't speak against their government, didn't come out at night for the unwritten curfew, and lived with a quiet paranoia that they even had trouble recognizing.

Cloud strode pass quickly without moving his eyes from the ground. He didn't want to look up and see the "No Trespassing" signs. Skimming briefly over the locked gates and to eye the sleeping dogs in the yards was enough. He didn't want to see the more subtle side of Shinra's power. It both saddened and angered him, but today he didn't want any more turmoil.

* * *

When the sun crested two days after Wutai War Memorial Day, there was only the faintest sign of dawn in the cadet barracks. Because the windows were so high up, only a pale glow out in the distance was visible in the dirty windows. Still, the cadets were so accustomed to waking up at daybreak that even that bit of sunlight irritated a stirring Reno. He grudgingly sat up on the bunk, habitually ducking his head to avoid the one on top, and rubbed his eyes, his mouth widening in a huge yawn as one bleary eye opened to look around. The edges of objects seemed off somehow, the corners of his vision blurry at first. It cleared up after a few moments though, and he opened the other, enjoying the lazy mornings he rarely had anymore.

As his eyes wandered the room though the good feeling he'd woken with disappeared. He didn't care that Kevin was still asleep and had morning wood, or that Dan was probably rubbing out a quickie under his sheet as he 'changed'. Reno's focus lay on Cloud's glaringly empty bed. The blond had even taken the time to draw his sheets up and fold them neatly with hospital corners. Reno wanted to sneer at the sheer dorkiness of Cloud, but settled for just sending a scowl at the oblivious Dan still shifting around under his covers.

The redhead dropped his look after a moment and ran his hands down his face in a sleepy gesture, failing to wake himself any more than he already was. He stood up slowly, avoiding the disorienting rush of blood to his head, and cracked each bone as he stretched, all the way down to flexing his toes for good fun. Feeling considerably looser than before, he treaded over to Cloud's bed and adjusted one corner of the sheet that was just slightly off, then headed to the bathroom before anyone realized he had risen.

* * *

When Shinra built the plate they turned the edges into essentially a giant balcony for the wealthy. These fine terraces were littered with gardens, benches, and scenic walks that offered spectacular views of the ocean or the mountain range behind Midgar. There were no clouds today though, from what Cloud could see, and his view was enormous. The sky was already getting that musty, sandy look that Cloud had learned was really the pollution manifesting rather than desert weather like some people thought. Even by his time the pollution was still lingering, though it got thinner every year.

Cloud was seated on the very edge of the plate; one of the areas Shinra hadn't turn into a stone garden or outdoor restaurant. There was only the solid concrete of the plate and a rickety rail preventing him from plummeting to his death. The plan for the edges of the plate worked splendidly, for the places that had nice landscapes to look out at least. For those that didn't—views that included empty swathes of desert and the SOLDIER training facilities out there—the backs of stores and restaurants blocked the view.

This spot that Cloud had discovered was at a corner, which Cloud had trouble understanding since Midgar was supposed to be circular in design, but no one ever said Shinra's architects were great. His legs dangled over the side, and the fear of falling seemed simple and laughable after all he had seen. He didn't always have this daredevil attitude, but last night's rest had been unpleasantly short. For some reason this day was like a death spell's counter over his head, reminding him of all the time he'd lost and all the wasted days he had in the future.

He'd been driven out of bed pretty quickly by his own thoughts, so he did his warm-ups a couple hours earlier than normal and gotten out of there fast. He slipped out of the cadet barracks and out of the compound, then cut through the backfields. There were no fences, just bushes that far out. No one with half a brain would really challenge a building full of chemically enhanced soldiers, so when the barracks were added later their backs were left open. The blond maneuvered through the shadows along the sides, relying on the height of bushes to cover him until he'd gotten far enough to slip out. He was out in a moment and making his way along the abandoned streets, knowing only a couple of patrols would be making round, but he would hear them long before they saw him. It was the dead hour of the night: too early to be awake, too late to be out.

* * *

"Yo. Thought I might find you here."

Cloud had turned up for lunch, probably because the food on Sundays was the best, but by the time Reno had gotten into the room the blond was already done eating and practically out the door. His behavior had seemed strange, but Reno had asked the right questions and done a little poking around and found him. He meandered into the area terribly proud at finding Cloud's niche.

The blond had heard footsteps and turned around as Reno walked in, looking like he had just walked into a bar and not a small training area. He had his hands stuffed into his back pockets as he slouched over slightly. His eyes were sharp despite his lax posture and were trailing up the walls, along the floor, and passing over Cloud like an unseen inspection. Cloud nodded at him after a calculated moment of just staring. Reno didn't look the least bit phased at Cloud's pointed look.

"What's got you all pissed off for?" Reno settled himself on the floor by one of the walls and made himself comfortable, clearly ignoring Cloud's generally angry disposition.

The blond turned away without answering, hardly in the mood to deal with Reno's attitude. People later on had known how to deal with these rocky days, and in cases like Vincent, understood it and experienced them himself. Hojo left no part of the soul unscarred, and some days those old wounds almost bled anew. Cloud had never seen a doctor about this—as though anyone could drag him near another lab coat if he didn't want to be there—but he guessed it was some form of PTSD. The blond was generally even-keeled, but sometimes the wrong mood, the right words—and in this case a day to set it all off—and he felt like clawing his way out of his own skin might help.

Tifa would skirt around him when it came on, just packing some food quietly and adding it to his bag on Fenrir. He might be gone for days at a time to burn off the sour taste in his mouth and erase the jolts of phantom pain he still felt, echoes from the lab. Here that wasn't an option. He couldn't just get up and fly away, and that steamed under his skin, though it was no one's fault really. He was still trapped in the building, in Midgar, in his mind.

That's why he hadn't left this spot all day since he got back. He'd gone straight here at seven a.m. when the gym doors opened, surprising the army guy on duty when he showed up as he unlocked the doors. Cloud had quickly grabbed one of the small gyms, built for platoon work and only designed for about eight men and their weapons. One guy had looked in, but seeing how angry Cloud was he'd backed out without comment. Cloud had the room to himself all day.

Reno could feel the blond's black mood rolling off him in waves, and it was part of the reason was Reno was sitting with his knees up rather than totally sprawled there. If Cloud decided to whip that sword he was holding in his direction, he wanted a running start.

The blond didn't seem particularly murderous at the moment, but he did seem very jumpy. Reno had a nasty feeling in his gut one wrong word would make him snap. Cloud's back to him, the blond lifted up the practice sword to swing again, but had hardly started the motion when another person called his name from the doorway, this time more exuberantly and far louder than before. "Hey Cloud!" Dan waved his arms frantically in the air as though Cloud could possibly miss him.

Reno visibly grimaced as Dan practically bounced over to Cloud. Reno thought the entire thing was nauseatingly gay. "I couldn't find you! Luckily, I saw Reno come here, so I figured he might know where you were if no one else did." Dan smiled at Cloud, but the blond just grunted in return.

Cloud lowered his sword from the ready position. He couldn't practice now that they both knew where he was. Annoyance flared through him, so strong his grip tightened on the sword and he had the sudden, immature urge to throw it. It was almost as bad as having to deal with his so-called fans from after Meteor, or the monsters running away near the end of a battle. They couldn't take a hint, could they?

"…So I thought maybe you and I could work on our materia together." Cloud had missed most of Dan's word over the sound of his own blood boiling in his ears, but it came back into his awareness at the innocent request. He still seemed unaware how angry Cloud was, and Reno either played the oblivious card or just wanted to rile him up some more. Either way, all their needy attachment did was feed the seething, frustrated anger.

"Look Cloud," Reno suddenly put in, "I was just wondering if you'd help me out with somethin'. See, remember that thing about Junon? Yeah, well, I've got tomorrow night cleared." The redhead leaned his head back against the wall, tilting it up at Cloud in a distinctly haughty way. Just that simple action, something far too reminiscent of the old Reno, irritated Cloud beyond belief, grating against his very nerve ends.

He could do this; he could be civil. His words still came out through ground teeth, but at least they weren't biting at the ends. "Monday's fine, but right now I need to practice." Cloud steadfastly didn't look at either of them; rather he spoke towards the wall in their general direction. Grey. Flat, blank, inoffensive. He could do this.

Dan hardly let Cloud finish his words before he jumped in. He sounded something like an offended child, but it disappeared as he got wrapped up in new ideas. "What about our materia practice? I can do it tonight, but what about Tuesday? We could get dinner together then head over to pick up the biggest room!"

Reno interrupted whatever else Dan was going to say, his pretentiousness clashing with Dan's enthusiasm in an argument that Cloud furiously worked to tune out, to let it wash over him because he was going to _punch_ someone if they didn't give him some space. Cloud took some deep breaths but it didn't help the ire roiling in his veins, and he clenched his hands so tightly the nails would break skin any time soon.

_Goddamnit, can't they shut up!_

"Spike, there you are! Look, if we can just get these papers done real fast I've got a treat for you." Cloud didn't even look over. He could feel the air popping in his ears and he was sure his face was starting to turn red. More people that wanted something from him! Haven't they taken enough already?

He didn't shout. He didn't chuck his sword at the yelling voices, or swing out at anyone. He didn't do anything at all. He just dropped his practice sword and walked out of there.

* * *

"What happened?"

Cloud and Zack were seated on Zack's sofa in the living room of his quarters. The SOLDIER's furnishings were overflowing with his personality. There was a lava lamp on the low table casting liquid shadows on the thick carpet, and the glass coffee table had random magazines strewn about it, some for cars, others for fancy electronics, and strangely enough a collection of old "Got Milk?" ads. The cream-colored kitchen area could just be seen over the countertop, and the sink had dirty pots and pans piled up in it, many in bright colors that didn't match. Zack's coffee mug was sitting on the counter. It had a ferocious roaring gorilla on it and some joke about cavities on the back. The pillows on the couch were of every material, cut, and color imaginable, and somehow the hodge-podge managed to match the brown suede of the sofa. The windows were thrown open, the doors down the hall left ajar. It was a cheerful and open room, and it really helped Cloud's state of mind to sit in it and soak in the Zack-ness of the setting. This was a new thing in an old life.

It had been several hours after the training room incident, and Cloud had simmered down almost completely. After storming off, he had left the barracks for places unknown. The redhead knew better than to fan the flames if he didn't want to get caught up in the firestorm, and made a note that the blond was to be avoided when angry.

Zack had braved Cloud's terrible mood though, aware that he was tangling with something he didn't fully understand or know. Cloud had been unresponsive at first, not wanting to hurt Zack's feelings but also wanting simply to be alone and work out the aggression. But Zack hadn't gotten upset with him at all, obviously used to dealing with cold impassivity from Sephiroth and brush-offs.

After much heated glaring from Cloud and a lot of gentle coaxing on Zack's part, the blond grudgingly admitted the truth. "I just… I just don't want to deal with all the shit for a day. It's not… It's not a good day, and I…"

The fire was gone now, but Zack felt pretty sure the current morose mood could flip back to black any time. And the cursing…it was so uncharacteristic of the blond that Zack's worry grew tenfold—and where had he learned all that colorful language? There was something seriously wrong, and Zack wanted to know what had set it off so he could fix it.

But first came Cloud and his hair-trigger emotions today, so Zack had whipped out some coupons for a good Wutain place, half-dragged Cloud up to his quarters, and cashed in on his promise.

"Cloud?"

The blond hadn't answered his question, and though Zack knew it was a touchy subject, he was still curious. Cloud had been dangerously mad, a toxic anger Zack had never seen from the normally milder boy. Cloud normally came off as fairly innocent hiding behind a tough-guy face belied by his youth. That kind of ire though… it spoke of a lot of hidden troubles.

The SOLDIER prodded Cloud a bit with his chopsticks. Some of the sauce and what looked like a bit of the head of a broccoli spear stuck to his arm before rolling off. Zack didn't even pretend to look apologetic, if he even noticed.

"It's just a bad day."

…All right. Zack could pretend he believed that. For now.

"Well, have you been into Midgar yet?" Zack stuffed some more chicken and broccoli into his mouth as Cloud watched. The SOLDIER was quite adept with chopsticks, probably having eaten out many times before, and the blond silently envied him for it. Yuffie had always laughed at Cloud's abysmal ability with the confounded utensils.

"Yeah." Cloud stared morosely into his beef and fried rice, stirring up the contents with the wooden sticks. There were bits of green clinging to the remaining slices of beef, and the fried rice had been all mixed up inside with all the vegetables and bits of egg. There was so much of the rice left, since Cloud had eaten a lot of the beef that it had begun to look like the innards of a giant slug all poured into the carton. With that lovely thought Cloud put down his half-finished meal and stuck the chopsticks upright in the little bowl of white rice next to it.

"You know," Zack said pointing to Cloud's upright chopsticks, "That's supposed to be an offering to the dead." Zack stuffed some more in his mouth as Cloud stared blankly at his inadvertent memorial. "Did someone die today?"

"No." _You died later._

"Did someone hurt you?"

Cloud swallowed hard and pretended he hadn't heard that last question, picking up his food so he had something to do with his hands. He didn't feel like he needed to hack and slash a monster into tiny pieces, but he still felt frustrated and annoyed at the world in general.

"…Midgar is a dump under the plate. Are they doing anything about it?" Vincent somewhere, most assuredly in his coffin _,_ was wincing at Cloud's complete lack of subtlety. Cloud just needed to get off the subject and needed to shut the door before he let the thoughts consume him again.

Zack eyeballed him for a good long moment before giving in with a sigh. Cloud just clammed up and there was no use ruffling his feathers more or letting him just tighten the lock on his mouth. Zack was worried if he pushed too hard he'd drive Cloud out the door the way Reno had. He'd only known the kid two short weeks, and he didn't want to fracture their friendship.

"Naw, they aren't doing anything to clean it up. The tourists don't see it, so what do they care? But yeah, I used to go there more often. I had a girlfriend there you know." Zack picked up another chunk of broccoli dripping with sauce and effortlessly popped it into his mouth. He didn't seem to notice Cloud's growing awkwardness. "She was beautiful, a complete sweetheart too. You would like her Cloud. Very gentle, loving, friendly. She worked with flowers all the time; even had a church with some in it and her backyard was full of them. I'm pretty sure she sells them down there still."

Cloud shifted on the couch. Zack and Aeris had been an item, he knew, but that had been a long time ago for him. It reminded Cloud of the humiliating breakdown of his memory that made him think he was Zack, and therefore essentially Aeris' boyfriend, though he didn't put it together then. And now to think of the two together felt strange. Aeris was well…Aeris. She was sort of the sister to the world.

Zack spied the nervous movement but didn't say anything. "We dated for a while, but things didn't work out. She wasn't in favor with Shinra, and I just made it that much more dangerous. Plus, being in SOLDIER is full time, you know?"

Cloud nodded absently, hoping the conversation might steer away naturally. Zack was amused by Cloud's unease, showing his age more than usual. If Zack had to guess too, he'd say the blond hadn't been with anyone before and probably had something for the General. Most boys did at some point or another, hero worship and puberty mixing together. Even Zack had fallen to it when he was young, though thankfully that phase hadn't been long.

Zack threw him a lazy smile. "Well, what about you? Any girlfriends back in Nibelheim? Anything now?"

Cloud shook his head quickly. Tifa had been a crush that faded fast, and beyond that he only had eyes for one person. That hadn't turned out so well though.

"Nothing? Well Cloud, we'll have to find someone for you then, huh?" Zack's light-hearted joke and the easy nudge to Cloud's ribs were only distantly received. Cloud was thinking about the slim-to-none chances he had with his number one—history hadn't exactly been kind.

"Hello? Cloud? You're thinking about someone! Fork it over Cloud, I'll find out somehow anyway. Girl? Guy?" Zack's teasing banter embarrassed him though, and he couldn't find the words to say no. He wanted to say Tifa almost, if only to get Zack off his back, but he'd probably end up digging himself into a lie.

"Let me guess? Childhood sweetheart? Someone you're going back to once you're a big SOLDIER?"

Wow, Zack hit the nail on the head—if this had been a younger Cloud. Now the Tifa Cloud knew didn't exist yet, and he only had one reason for going back to Nibelheim. "No. I'm not thinking of anyone."

Zack just laughed. He didn't buy it and Cloud knew he wouldn't. Zack had an uncanny ability like that sometimes, probably from working with the General who could deliver any line flat. Cloud flushed a little more at the thought of the General, and Zack just grinned at him. It must have hurt his face from how wide it was, but the First Class SOLDIER didn't seem to care. "Gay then?" Cloud resolutely shook his head, but Zack knew better. "Hmm… it could be another cadet. Or a SOLDIER. Come on Cloud, spill it."

Cloud summoned up the same courage that had pitted him against Sephiroth and saved him against the Weapons, Jenova, and Hojo, for this. He looked Zack directly in the eye as he fed him the biggest lie he had probably ever knowingly told. "There's no one."

It was lying outright to Zack like that, which was discomforting, but Cloud didn't need the embarrassment or the scrutiny. This was the most harmless lie he could tell Zack—all the other ones would put the First in serious danger.

"Ah well, I'm sure we'll find someone for you soon. I'll keep my eyes peeled. I met Aeris when I was on this mission, and I had to land on this train, but it was going to the slums and…" Zack's voice trailed away as he chatted about his first dates with Aeris, describing her since he had no idea Cloud knew her at all, let alone as well as he did. It made Cloud a little nostalgic, but more than a little sad to think back on his own screwed up relationships.

Cloud had never had a girlfriend, despite his mother's hopes. On AVALANCHE it had been the absolute last thing on his mind, especially since it was _Sephiroth_ they were chasing. Before AVALANCHE he'd been too shy to experiment.

Then… the mansion. It was probably the worst place for a first experience. Hojo kept his lab rats separated for the most part, and though Zack and Cloud were next to each other in mako-bath tubes, they were eons apart. Every month or two these temporary test tubes would build up with grime and dirt from bodily fluids. So while they were cleaned and no tests were being run, Zack and Cloud got a few hours to see each other without the glass between them. Though far too weak to do much with all the drugs in their system and the mako exposure, any human touch was better than the unrelenting cold. So Cloud and Zack had gotten as close as possible—and closer still.

It didn't matter that the floor was solid metal. Or that they were shivering, dosed with sickening amounts of drugs, covered in puncture marks, half blind and almost brain dead. None of that mattered. Lips on skin, hands on neglected places, the building warmth, the flush, the climax, the aftermath. Those moments, when they could barely string words together, when touch was the only communication they still had, those moments were what Cloud had lived for in that place. He couldn't dream of escape, but he could dream of those, and for those moments when he saw stars at Zack's hand, mako tubes, laboratories, and glinting glasses were forgotten.

"Hey Cloud, you've never slept with anyone, right?"

Cloud's mind jerked back into Zack's apartment, not fully aware he'd been drifting off like that, thinking about him and Zack… Technically, in this body, he was still a virgin, though in his experience he had slept with others before—including, ironically, the man next to him. His hesitation must have given an answer to Zack anyway.

"Thought so. Aeris and I never got that far, but she was certainly pretty enough. But she was the kind of girl you marry and do right by, you know? I'll definitely take you down to meet her sometime. She's worth it because she's the most beautiful thing there. But she's modest, always says the flowers outshine her…" Zack's enamored rambling sounded like he still liked her, though Cloud knew somehow it wasn't like that. The SOLDIER still thought of her, still found her beautiful, but he would never try the relationship again. Cloud wondered if the First had other ways to scratch the itch, since he didn't know of any other serious relationships Zack had before.

During AVALANCHE's time, Cloud had been far too busy to consider sex at all, and the outlet for most of his aggression was all the fighting they did. When things slowed down afterwards, the increased libido of mako seemed to rear its head. Cloud had found an unlikely partner, one who he could let go with unabashedly, and understood the mako-driven need as well as anyone else could. They both agreed there was no emotional basis for it, only the trust that came with endless travel and fighting together, and shared horrors.

The only man alive that didn't wince at some of Cloud's scars was Vincent. Likewise, Cloud didn't linger over the man's patchwork of scar tissue that enveloped his body. They had an equal understanding, and sometimes, in Cloud's home or wherever Vincent happened to be, they would indulge themselves. It was even less frequent than Cloud's bouts with Zack, but gratifying still.

"Cloud! Cloud! Man, you are up in the clouds today." Zack shrugged with an easy smile on his face. Cloud just nodded slightly. Zack gestured to the food still sitting between them. Zack was fairly neat, but much to Cloud's embarrassment, there were bits of rice scattered about and droplets of sauce dotting his side of the table. "You done? Just toss everything out. Every time Seph comes over he complains about old Wutain hanging out in the fridge. Pet peeve or something."

Cloud tried not to look too interested in Sephiroth's visits to Zack's apartment, but couldn't stop himself from wondering if he had sat… Cloud almost jumped out of the seat before he did something stupid before scooping up a mass of white and cartons and their messy contents and dumping it into the trash. It looked late, as he glanced outside, maybe past curfew.

Zack came up behind him with the other pile of food and left over drinks, draining his root beer in one go. Cloud just dropped his glass lemonade bottle into Zack's empty recycling bin.

"Let me walk you back to the barrack so you don't get in trouble."

"It's alright. I can get back okay. They don't check our hallway until the second hour." As nice as Zack was being, and as much as Cloud wanted to spend time with him, he needed a few moments to digest the entire day. What had started so badly had ended with Cloud in a strange mood, fitfully between bittersweet and melancholy for the life Zack should have had.

Zack raised an eyebrow at Cloud's statement. "If you're sure. Just mention me if you get caught so I can pull rank and get you out of whatever shit they dump you with." Zack walked him to the door and patted his shoulder. "Night Spike. See you tomorrow."

Cloud went out into the hallway and turned back to Zack to catch the last of the man's smile.


	12. Summoners Be Warned

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cloud tests out his magic ability, and Sephiroth does a little digging.

It was the second week now that he had woken in these barracks, and the disorienting feeling of shock when realizing he wasn't in his cabin had finally begun to really disappear. Cloud got up and started with his morning exercises on automatic. His body had taken to the routine fairly quickly, which was something Cloud took advantage of now. He had to remind himself to focus on the positives and not think about his old strength or weapons as he went through the repetitive motions. It was a test of will though, because for every daydream about hacking Hojo into a million pieces, Cloud was bombarded by comparisons if himself to "before".

The blond relaxed back onto the floor and stretched his tense muscles, letting go of that train of thought. Even after hanging out with Zack yesterday, he was still more tightly wound than usual, and he could feel every string in his body pull tauter than before. Even just that small thought that he was a bundle of potential power, albeit not as powerful as he was before, thrilled him a little. Any progress was progress, as Shinra said.

Cloud turned his head to the side and lowered his legs to lie completely on the floor, just breathing as he gave his tired muscles a breather. He would shower later. The trafficked dirt and dust on the floor was hardly any worse than him lying on the rough desert sand.

He stared blankly at someone's overturned shoes that had slid partway under the bed and were just peeking out. Cloud's eyes mindlessly traced the grooves of the boot, glimpsing over the green gum stuck on the bottom and lingering a little on the peeling sole at the toe. The boy on the bed above it snorted and rolled over, and Cloud smoothly stood back up into a standing position, shaking his head once to clear some of the fog that had fallen over it.

* * *

Across the compound and considerably higher up, Sephiroth steadily stared out at the ocean through the floor-to-ceiling windows that graced his dining room, his face blank but eyes thoughtful. The windows were set high above the fields below him, and higher still because his apartment was on the plate. From this angle, the ocean's abundance was clear, the desert between him and it vast and hazy.

Sephiroth's eyes were trained on the foaming waves he could just make out in the distance, with all their riotous and powerful majesty on display. His mind was blissfully blank, free from numbers and names or benign words and maps floating through. It was a state of mind he only seemed able to find in the early mornings, when even the sun was not awake.

The sun had dawned now though and had begun its steady climb upwards, cresting over the ocean and shattering the blue with a dazzling light display of pearly oranges shading into deep pinks and reds. The colors washed over Sephiroth's pale frame, falling dead upon his strict black work pants and white button-up top, but his loosened hair glistening iridescently.

Sephiroth turned away from the beauty of the sunrise and padded around the counter bordering the dining room and round to the other side of the kitchen. The fine wooden cabinets were raised above the black granite counter top. The surface of the counter was wiped clean, the subtle designs within the stone visible to Sephiroth's sharp eyes. The crockery was all tucked away neatly in the cupboards, the various appliances positioned throughout the large area. Sephiroth crossed to the dishwasher, ignoring his chilled feet on the tiled floor. The large refrigerator was the only thing making noise in the kitchen, the hulking stainless steel giant humming quietly into the silence. The sink adjacent to it had a single plant resting on the edge, a yet un-bloomed thistle plant Zack had left with him.

His breakfast was simple and quick, a part of his morning that invariably never changed. He woke early, always before dawn, and set himself a cup of steaming coffee to drink. One cup was all he needed, his system already starting up more quickly than any human's. It was why he was up before dawn too, since four hours of sleep was enough to keep him going. With disdain he thought to the survival week he went through when he joined SOLDIER—it had been a breeze.

Some nights were like this, full of circling thoughts pecking at him like vultures on a corpse. When he woke, he lounged on the couch, cup in hand, watching the play of light on the wall and just clearing his mind of the annoying repetition. Other times, days where sleep came more fitfully or not at all, disturbed by horrid memories, he stood on the cool marble of his bathroom floor and scrutinized himself in the mirror, staring at his distinctive eyes the most, and tracing the barest hint of scars. Most days though, inevitably the ones full of work and training, he found himself standing in the unused dining room staring at the ocean, a place that held it's secrets close.

Sephiroth set a full kettle of water on the stove and turned up the heat. He then turned to the sink and washed out his simple white coffee mug, his eyes never straying from the task. He smoothly pulled the mug out from under the water, placing it back into the cabinet in front of the various bright, spotted, worded and colored ones Zack had given him over the years. He had never used them, but he hadn't thrown them out either.

He felt the waves of heat from the stove across the island, could hear the starting bubbles as the water began to boil. Sephiroth's back shivered at the quiet caress of the steam, and he crossed the kitchen, turning off the heat and pulling down another plain cup as he moved. Gracefully he lifted the steel kettle catching it before the whistle, a trick he had picked up to avoid the ear-splitting noise. Not a drop fell on to the counter as he poured a cup and slipped the tea bag into the simmering liquid. Done, he left the kitchen with his tea and returned to the bedroom to change.

Sephiroth quickly finished dressing and sipped the last of his tea. He rubbed his hands down his slacks one last time and washed the cup out in the kitchen before heading into the living area to get Masamune. He strapped the massive sword on to his back, pulled on his leather gloves, and stepped out of his apartment a moment later. He locked the door behind him as he left, pocketing the keys in the upper left pocket of his jacket. He only wore the leather assemble for special practices and addresses to the entire army, not for paperwork. He left silently through the modern building and across the courtyard, past the three-dimensional Shinra logo complete with fountain, and into Shinra Headquarters. The guard at the front desk sleepily saluted him as he passed. The General only nodded.

There was no time that Shinra HQ was not busy, but the early morning was the quietest. Nightshift workers scurried about, their shoes scuffing on the floor and the rolling squeaks of janitors' carts echoed in the corridors. The copy room was at its emptiest; the employees working quietly in their identical offices were held together only by their fourth cup of coffee and a persistent case of insomnia.

The General's floor was deserted. His three Lieutenant Generals were never here this early. There was an en-mass belief that First Class SOLDIERs were able to slack off, and Zack perpetuated that. It probably encouraged the greener SOLDIERs and disappointed the veterans. Zack was his SOLDIER Lieutenant General, and he only rose at dawn for a mission or battle—anything less, in his words, wasn't worth his time. The other two were regulation army men and more managers than soldiers. They too took advantage of extra sleep.

Sephiroth stepped into his office, setting Masamune on its horizontal stand against the right wall. He never really liked the way it looked in his office, making it appear more of a ceremonial sword than the partner that it was. The stand in his apartment was hand-carved in Wutai and probably worth more than some men's lives. Few things had his wealth showered on them by Sephiroth, and Masamune was it.

After positioning Masamune safely, his jacket was slipped off and draped on the back of his chair. There was a stack of paper work left over from yesterday still waiting patiently on his desk for his signature, and so he drew out the moment of contemplation, adjusting the cuffs of his button-up white shirt and straightening out his slacks. Sometimes he wondered what people would think if they knew their strict General could be such a procrastinator at times.

His eyes hardly passed over the books in the shelves and his ears barely picked up the silent thrum of the air conditioner above the far window. This room was as familiar to him as his own bedroom, and a sanctuary of its own kind. Rufus had only dropped by here once, and had immediately understood that under no uncertain terms that this was the General's territory. Although Sephiroth's manners might have been coldly cordial, it was made very clear early on in the exchange that this was not the safest spot to launch attacks, nor take direct hits. The President's son had never come back.

Sephiroth's eyes fell on the paperwork and a great feeling of annoyance washed over him. He didn't feel like looking through it, his eyes already complaining before he had even offered more than a glance. Instead, he settled into his chair and swiveled to look at the blank computer screen, contemplating what to do. The paperwork would have to be done eventually, but that didn't mean he couldn't do something quick before hand.

He turned on the computer, examining the Shinra logo that greeted him on the opening page. The one outside in the fountain was a cube, but here on screen it was the traditional flat, four-sided diamond painted a vibrant red with two characters spelling Shinra in the center. It was a symbol of desired association and awe, at least to those not a part of Shinra, although many of the younger recruits wore it proudly on their uniforms. The novelty wore off after the first kill done in its name though.

The image disappeared and the computer greeted him with his desktop, a colorless abstract swath behind his icons. His fingers flew over the keyboard easily in well-practiced, precise strokes as he scanned through recently touched documents of his subordinates. Most were mission reports, some files on various places. Zack had done hardly anything in weeks, skimping out by doing anything but the minimum of his paperwork and escaping to train or hang out with Cloud Strife.

Speaking of Strife…

Sephiroth pulled up the cadet charts, running through recent grade history and other notes made by the instructors. Hale had made a comment about Cloud in his materia class, expounding on the amazing blast of energy the blond had created. Enough force to melt the door apparently. Sephiroth assumed the man was exaggerating, excited at the idea of any capable materia user in the cadet group. That was what he got for almost deserting the army back in Wutai.

Still, any magic on the part of a cadet was more than what most achieved, and Cloud being able to damage a door was quite impressive, if suspicious. It was a serious indication of skill at the least, but Sephiroth was leaning towards more of a natural affinity for magic. It was unusual nonetheless, no matter the explanation, and he made a note to ask if Zack had been working with him on it. Even though that might not explain this sudden burst of energy, seeing as Zack wasn't a particularly strong magic user.

Deciding it was a matter for another time, Sephiroth clicked on Cloud's name, opening up his profile. There was the same picture; his stubborn look of teenage defiance and hair jutting up wildly. Sephiroth looked at it amused for a moment before scanning down the rest of it. He was of a slightly smaller stature as he had noticed before, and at first glance not anyone of any real interest. Fatherless, it seemed, and young. In fact he was only… seventeen.

As of yesterday no less.

It was odd of Zack not to have mentioned it. Or at least tried to prepare some massively embarrassing birthday party and somehow managing to wrangle him into signing a birthday card. Had Zack not known? Surely Cloud would have mentioned it.

…Or, maybe he might not. The blond was terribly quiet and closed-mouthed about himself from Zack's accounts.

Zack was frustrated by Cloud, he knew, though the First hid it behind good cheer. The SOLDIER's stubbornness and experience with other tight-lipped people was probably the only reason he even bothered. That, and Zack had shared with him that he felt a kinship with Cloud.

A third possibility came to him; that Zack could have simply not told him about the birthday. The man wasn't obligated to say everything on his mind, and he surely didn't, so maybe this thought hadn't come out of his mouth as well. But still, if he did know, why omit?

Sephiroth lingered over the birth date a little longer, the date inconspicuous enough. August nineteenth… Maybe Cloud had just felt rude bringing it up.

He dismissed the thought, resolving to mention it to Zack and see if the other man knew anything.

The rest of the profile was more basic information. Cloud's test scores had ranged fairly low earlier in the year, along with his physical marks, but those were lifting now. Zack's training must be doing him some good, even though the black-haired man hadn't mentioned any book study. Perhaps that or Cloud had just gotten even more motivated from his encounter with Zack.

Sephiroth closed the profile after a moment, setting aside his wandering thoughts. He had plenty of time to think about the enigma of Cloud Strife later. Paperwork was calling now.

* * *

The barracks were emptying as the cadets drowsily made their way to breakfast. The alarm had gone off, and Cloud had waited seated on his bunk for it like he did every morning. Reno and Dan were slow to rise, though once Dan was up he was awake and bouncing all day. Today he was unmatched in enthusiasm since it was Monday, and Monday was materia day.

"…and then I saw this play once where the main character jumps right out of bed and–"

"Argh, shut up already!" The shirt he was pulling over his head muffled Reno's yell, but it was loud enough to jar Dan to silence. Dan had been going non-stop for the last couple of minutes, which was probably why the room had been vacated so quickly, and Cloud was thankful for the break. A couple of boys still lingered, but the blond hardly gave them a glance.

"Can't be quiet, can he?" Reno was hopping on one foot now, yanking on his military boot and trying to tie it at the same time. Dan had moved off to the other side of the room, probably to engage the last two boys in conversation. Cloud couldn't hear what they were saying over Reno's shouts and cursing as he fell backwards, losing his balance and smacking his head against the wooden frame of the bed.

"Damnit! The hell are you looking so happy for?" Reno's fierce accusation was met by a momentary downturn of Dan's lips before the boy put a smile back on his face. He knew Reno was just taking out his anger on him.

Dan pranced to the door and turned back to Cloud. "Let's go to breakfast, Cloud. He can catch up." With that parting comment he hopped out the door and down the hallway, half-jogging half-walking. Cloud could hear the uneven sound of his boots hitting the floor. After a moment, the blond followed. Reno snapped his belt on and strode after him.

In breakfast things were relatively silent. Reno chewed loudly and Dan only made comments about the food, all positive, to which neither replied. Their table was empty save for them as usual, and no one was bothered by it.

Cloud was the first to finish since he had eaten the least. One slice of a toast and a banana was all he really needed to get going. His system had grown used to living off a limited food supply, and even if this body wasn't the same, his mind told his stomach when it was full.

"Wait up Cloud. We can head to class together." Dan's blatant following won him a nasty look from Reno. The blond could only imagine what the redhead thought of Dan's dependency.

"I'm not going to class." Dan's face fell as he absorbed the words, looking a little puzzled at the same time. This was probably something he hadn't quite expected from Cloud. Reno, on the other hand, almost looked triumphant.

"I'll skip with you, since last night you up and vanished and–"

"No." It was final. Cloud was finding that teenage friendships had serious disadvantages at times.

Reno's mouth closed in surprise. "Then when am I gonna see you?"

"Later. Tonight maybe."

Dan had become an audience to this second conversation that to him had somehow sprung from his own. His head moved to each speaker, watching them attentively. Nonetheless their eyes were conveying a lot of things: Cloud's mostly annoyance and irritation, Reno's reflecting anger and suspicious curiosity. Dan pressed his knuckle to his upper lip, drawing it between his teeth to nibble at awkwardly. Things had tensed up between them as he considered the way both seemed taller than him in this moment. He chewed a little harder on his lip as he realized how disconnected he was suddenly from them, as if he were a child before two adults.

The teeth dragging down on his flesh made a sudden cut, the heat and shock jump-started his system. He spat out the blood on the floor and the tension broke at his actions when they both glanced over at him. Some part of him was pleased at that. Reno's face was disgusted; Cloud's perfectly blank.

Cloud turned his back on them after a beat and walked out. He was among the first to leave, but no one watched the blond go but him and Reno. Reno's eyes were trained on his back, obviously considering following him.

Well, Cloud clearly needed some space, especially after yesterday. His friend had some issues, and he probably didn't want a blabbermouth like Reno to spread word of what bothered him. Maybe someone said something, or he messed up in class. It would be like Cloud to take that personally, and Dan had liked that other, younger side of Cloud. So he had tried to coax it out, through friendliness and being open with him. Cloud resisted, but Dan was determined to find some of that quieter and kinder Cloud.

And so, when Cloud had his problems yesterday, Dan knew that another side of Cloud was coming through to hide the soft side. He just had to wait for the defense to fade, but Reno hadn't understood. Dan tried to be a good friend to Cloud, but Reno got in the way more than helped, and he certainly just made things worse. He turned to Reno as the thought occurred to him. "You cut class and I'll tell Hale. He'll have your hide then."

Reno sneered at him, picking up his tray and dumping it a little more roughly than intended. "You gonna tattle on Cloud too?"

"No, just you." Dan smiled sweetly at Reno, knowing it would set the redhead off.

Reno shot him the darkest glare he had. He knew he was caught though. "I'm gonna blast your ass or freeze it off, bastard."

Dan just smiled at the threat _,_ clearly amused with Reno's inaptitude with materia. "It's called Shell, idiot."

* * *

The empty room Cloud had slipped into was a traditional materia practice room. It was a square box with thick plastic from floor to ceiling to trap lightening magic. There was a ledge on the left side to stand on, leaving an eight-square-foot area open for balls and small explosions of magic.

Cloud had picked this particular one because of its location. The room was just beyond an intersection and across from a janitorial closet. It was often overlooked since the other materia practice rooms were around the corner and generally larger. He'd found it long ago when he was first there, though it had been a hideout from the bullies hoping to catch him on the way to meals. Later on he'd come back, just to take a look at the ruin of something from his childhood, only to find a huge, mako-altered wolf in it. Cloud had killed it, wondering if something else had died in this room before because of the simply horrendous smell. It was strange that after all these years that smell had stuck with him.

He shook off the thought and couldn't help but smirk as something else occurred to him. He was turning into Vincent; lurking around buildings, brooding on past grievances, avoiding human contact. At least he could pass it off as teenage angst, unlike Vincent who still looked twenty-seven physically but was pushing past middle-aged.

Well, as a teenager, he certainly had never stolen expensive materia before. There was a first for everything though. Cloud moved to one of the corners on the elevated ledge next to the wall, pulling out the stolen materia from his boot. If there was one thing Yuffie had taught him, it was how to nab and conceal materia. The supply closet with the basic materia in it was laughably easy to get into. He'd grabbed one of each kind and gotten out without being seen.

The whole room had been begging to be robbed. The glow was visible from under the door and the lock had punch-in numbers on it that were worn down from being pressed so many times. Three different combinations and Cloud was in. The whole closet was shelved from floor to ceiling, every shelf covered in what looked like the biggest marble collection in the world.

The ones he'd taken had a good amount of experience built up, but nothing too noticeable that people would realize they were gone. Attention was the very last thing he wanted. He picked one up from the pile and rolled it in his palm. He was almost afraid to try the materia, unsure of what could happen. Was he closer to the Planet since it had sent him back here, and that was why he now had this ability with magic? Should he try to contact the Planet again? Or had that burst been just a freak accident?

He hadn't even thought to ask Aeris, and now that seemed rather stupid since the melting-door incident had been so recent. He'd been so wound up it hadn't even occurred to him.

He tilted his head to the side, rolling an Earth materia in his hands. This one wasn't for practice, since Quake was dangerous to use inside a building. The result probably would have been funny though. He could imagine Shinra executives running around, worried about the plate falling in and trying to find a way to get the obese President to safety. The image was satisfying, even if he couldn't act on it. The more powerful materia, like the Ultima and Comet he'd once had all had to be manipulated in the desert for practice. And that was strictly for SOLDIERs. Only SOLDIERs had clearance to destroy large expanses of land. The regulation army was only given the basic elemental materia and these tiny rooms to practice in.

_I wonder if I could melt the reinforced walls…_

The one in his hand was bright green, with a white core pulsating slowly. The green was speckled with bits of darker coloration all the way to black. The shapes and colors were constantly changing, rotating on an invisible axis. It was as dazzling as staring into a fire. Before he knew it, the ground shifted slightly beneath him. The finest of cracks started from where he was seated, rippling outward to the wall before falling dead.

He squeaked suddenly and uncharacteristically, dropping the materia and groping for another. He was so surprised by the even the mild shaking he hadn't even considered anything but making it stop. It was silly, and he leaned down to pick up the dropped materia that had rolled a little away, relaxing as he did so. He'd been admiring the power in his hand, the barest thought of using it flickering across his mind, and the ground had begun to rumble. If just by holding it the magic had become attuned to him, enough to sense cadences in his will, _what would he be like when he wanted to blow stuff up?_ and that realization scared him a little.

Well, his question was answered at least. His magic _was_ more powerful. Enough that he could activate a materia without going through a medium like a bracer as was normal.

Weapons, armor, almost all of it had slots for materia that channeled the magic to help the wielder more easily use it. The fact that Cloud was doing magic without that was a testament to this new enhancement. Unless the user was highly skilled, it was almost a requirement to equip it. Aeris had been the only one in the group who could use a typical materia without it from almost the start. Red XIII and Yuffie had achieved that level with a lot of work, and only with lower level materia.

He couldn't help the small smile that came on to his face, even though this smugness was rather new to him. It looked like he wasn't without some advantages after all. Cloud tucked the Earth into his pocket and pulled out the Ice. With careful precision he held it out in his hand, extending his arm away from his body. The materia fit perfectly into the palm of his hand, his fingers clenching around the rounded exterior. He could almost feel the movement, like it was breathing quietly in his hand, a sensation he had never felt before. The roiling waves inside it were moving against his hand like an invisible liquid.

He would've smiled stupidly at the sheer awesomeness of the feeling, but the weight of what it meant was enough to ruin it. This was a piece of the Planet itself, a bit of its soul. Did anyone realize what power these little balls of light held?

He would have to see Aeris again, find out what this was all about. He rolled the materia in his hand again, admiring the glimmer through his fingers. He tapped it with his nail, hearing the hollowness of the sound, a fine clear note.

Concentrating, Cloud envisioned a blizzard filling the room, shards of ice flying in a tight circle, freezing wind biting his skin. The more detail added to the image the better the result. He focused that will into the materia, telling it to make what he saw happen. A cloud of white wind started up first, spinning counterclockwise with ever-gaining speed. As it spun faster and faster the ice in the wind condensed, forming sharp blades that whirled threateningly. As the power built, Cloud could feel his hands burning, his fingers gripping the materia tightly as he controlled the element, this raw force of nature.

It was the most amazing feeling, enthralling and gripping. He could feel the temperature dropping in the room; see the condensation building up on the walls. The floor was littered with flecks of snow; his whole body was exhilarated with the sudden cold. There was so much energy thrumming in the room that the hair on his arms was standing on end, his spine on fire from shivers from both the cold and the power rush. Was this what it felt like to be Shiva, the Queen of Ice? Or a summon?

His eyes were watering, lips chapping, and fingers bloodless, but he wouldn't let go. No wonder summons hated to be in materia, no wonder they always seemed so angry, so defiant and proud when released. This kind of power confined? Cloud wanted to laugh, but his throat was tightly shut, the cold burning into his face and whipping snow into his lashes.

The vortex continued to circle with increasing fervor, the storm he was creating howled like a wounded animal, the shards beating against the invisible walls of space Cloud's will alone was holding it to. This awesome storm was like a Nibelheim blizzard packed into a closet-sized room, powerful and wild, writhing in its torrent, and Cloud alone controlled it.

He might have kept it up for hours, though likely it had been ten very long seconds, but finally the strength and danger of the storm began to register. Every detail fell back into sharp relief when one bladed shard cut the edge of his face, catching right under his left eye. The pain knocked everything back into place, the first thing being that he was not a god, and this was not normal.

Fear returned to him, and the danger of where he was sitting, what power he was staring in the face came to him. He dropped the materia, and the wind flew into a greater rage, howling in all its ferocity, and he wondered if maybe this was some kind of summoning, that he let something out. Cloud scrambled back, feeling the first stings of panic. He dug into his pockets desperately, his hands shaking from the cold and adrenaline. Where was that fire materia?

But even as he felt himself up and down for it, the blizzard before him had begun to slow, the howling of the wind dying off. The energy seemed to drain away, dissipating back into the atmosphere. Cloud's heart was flying in his chest as the last shreds of the violent storm trickled to the floor, the snowflakes fluttering like leaves. He couldn't seem to draw a deep breath or take his eyes away from what he had just done.

Cloud sat back, wiping the back of his neck as he just realized how hot he had become. The cut on his face was beaded with blood and he might have a windburn on his cheeks. His hair was wildly messed up, flung in all directions and dripping with snow. One cold droplet slipped down the back of his collar, and he felt the whole thing tingle down his back, like a great shudder of wings.

He leaned back against the wall, sagging as he rested. The Planet had given him something that even the mako he had before couldn't match. What exactly it was he wasn't sure, but powerful magic was all he really needed to know. That, and to be very careful when using it.

"…Thank you."

It was breathy, it was barely even a voice in the room, but he had meant the words with his whole heart. Mako had given him back the edge in battle, even over SOLDIERs. This could be decisive in a victory over a greater number of enemies or a stronger foe. He gave a tired smirk to the empty room, pleased even as he tried to get his breath back.

* * *

The door was thrown open dramatically and with enough force to rattle the paintings off the walls of the adjacent room. Sephiroth had installed a rubbed doorstopper when Zack was elevated to Lieutenant General specifically to stop that. As it was, Zack's entrance was met with the resounding bang and rebound of the door, which knocked him squarely in the nose.

"Happy Monday to you Seph." Zack had two fingers clutching his nose, his voice scrunched up as he spoke around it. It hadn't taken any color out of his enthusiasm, but it had startled him enough to cut him off for the moment. After a beat, the SOLDIER trooped into the office and slouched ungracefully in the chair opposite the General's desk. There was never any formality, no salute or offer to run and get coffee. Zack had long given up on even trying, seeing as how his relationship with Sephiroth ran deeper than just co-workers.

They were _friends_.

That didn't stop Sephiroth from giving Zack a hard glare for good measure. Friends or not, some things would never change. Sephiroth refused to look away, meeting Zack's eyes with his unrelenting bright stare, holding it until Zack's eyes flickered away. He'd been thinking about it, and it was really bothering him:

"Did you know it was Strife's birthday yesterday?"


	13. The Ties That Bind

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cloud and Reno go on a midnight excursion, and Zack treats Cloud.

"Reno, take the manager's computer!" Cloud whispered as loud as he dared, his eyes frantically roaming the walls for cameras. Reno didn't say a word, but he turned away from the cubicle he was poised to enter into, backtracked, and headed for one of the offices on the side of the room.

It was a large, uniform room full of identical cubicles in neat lines, each with a symmetrical set up of a stiff chair, fake wooden desk, and a computer set on it. There was little to identify one Shinra employee's desk from another, and the managers would have been the same if they didn't sit in the only unattached room. It was the definition of the Shinra workplace: modern and robotic.

Reno was crouched by the glass wall of an office, one of the manager's of this floor. Nearly every Shinra floor was identical, so picking an office to raid hadn't been too hard. The only issue was surveillance, but floor 21 was low enough to have the minimum. The higher the floor meant the more demanding and important the work, and therefore more cameras and guards. Down here though, it was mostly accounting, so the patrol was limited and the surveillance even less.

Still, Cloud glanced around the corner of the cubicle he kneeled by to look down the aisle and into the hallway. The lights were low during the night hours, but all the offices were pitch black. He'd angled the door to be ajar just so he could see the play of shadows at the end of the corridor by the corner near the stairs. Reno had leaned against the glass, just out of Cloud's sight. The blond could hear him tap the lock though, tapping the glass around it with his knuckles for good measure too.

"Ha, not even locked." In the semi-darkness Reno's grin was probably very hard to see, but Cloud didn't turn around and crane his neck to even try.

The planning for this 'invasion', as Reno called it, had been limited at best. As soon as Cloud had come back from afternoon classes, Reno had hauled him off. The redhead had run through a rough plan of how he wanted his first question answered.

In all the mayhem of Cloud's birthday he'd completely forgotten his promise to Reno. In exchange for teaching him parkour, Reno expected help on answering some questions. They turned out to be more harmless than Cloud had thought, though harmless was a more relative term. Sneaking around Shinra Headquarters at one in the morning wasn't usually considered harmless.

Compared to what Reno could have asked though, this was nothing.

The door clicked behind Cloud as Reno eased it open. This office had large panes of glass for walls facing the cubicles, but the blinds had been pulled down at the end of the day. Every light was off in the room, so the only glimmer came through the handful of windows to the outside. The hallway was lit dimly though, and combined with the vague moonlight there was enough to work by.

Cloud hadn't been too surprised in their brief planning session to find that Reno knew quite a bit about the rotation and paths of the guards. The last time Cloud had broken into Shinra Headquarters, he'd ended up in an air vent above the President's boardroom. Reno's ideas were a little more concrete than that, and he had actually planned it out better, though that wasn't saying much.

There was one guard to every eight floors until floor 40, where patrols and surveillance increased significantly. The guards on the lower floors had to make a full rotation in a zigzag pattern over the eight levels they were guarding, using the stairwells on both sides of each floor. Reno had made sure to time it so they would be able to reach the 21st floor while the guard was on a higher level. That way, the guard would pass them by once on his way back down, which significantly cut the chances of being caught than if he came by twice.

To get up to the 21st floor, Reno had planned everything out with a map, lines drawn all over it like it was a football game, with them essentially darting in and out of rooms to avoid notice. Cloud had pointed out the emergency stairwell on the side of the building, and Reno had scrapped his idea at once.

The last time Cloud had broken into Shinra Headquarters he had used this method. He had avoided any fighting, but the group had been exhausted climbing almost sixty stories. Cloud had conveniently left out that he knew the stairwell only opened on the even floors, because that might have been suspicious. It hadn't deterred Reno though, who was inordinately fascinated with how Cloud knew about this stairwell, but he'd gotten the hint with Cloud's stony silence to any questions.

Of course, getting in was much easier than what Reno needed to do. He had to hack into a computer quickly but without triggering an alarm to answer his question: What the hell was Shinra doing in Junon?

Why Reno cared Cloud didn't know and he didn't ask—he did half wonder if the redhead was associated with an underground group or something and was selling the information, but it didn't much matter to Cloud. Reno would get it somehow; he was certainly clever enough. Cloud just simplified the process with the emergency stairwell.

The blond already knew what Shinra was doing in Junon, but the canon was top secret right now from what Cloud could figure on the news. There hadn't been a whisper of it, and it didn't sound like it had been built yet either (because who could miss it when it was sticking out of the harbor like that?). Reno was hacking into the manager's computer to access any information concerning Shinra's activities in Junon. More SOLDIERs than usual had been sent there, along with a couple of science teams and raw goods normally used to stabilize and maintain the plate. Cloud didn't know how Reno knew that either, but his connections certainly had their facts in order.

Cloud shifted his weight a bit, still resting on the balls of his feet. He couldn't sit down because he needed to be able to move fast if the guard came by. His senses were all on alert, eyes sharpened and hearing strained. Every muscle was coiled, ready to duck under a desk in a cubicle if any shadow so much as twitched.

The tension was palpable even in Reno, who acted a little more nonchalant than Cloud. The redhead had gotten a little condescending when he referred to this 'invasion', taking pride in that he'd done something of this caliber, or at least similar to it, before. Cloud wanted to snort at how juvenile he was acting, but he couldn't exactly blurt out that this was nothing compared to what he had done and keep calling Reno immature. So he'd taken Reno's haughtier-than-normal attitude with indifference.

Cloud could hear the furious typing slipping through the open crack left by the door. Reno's hacking skills were still un-tempered because he hadn't had much access to a computer in the slums, but he had time to hone it. No doubt he'd been very good when he was a Turk, but for now he just wanted to try his hand at it. Not that Cloud could argue with that, since he had cut class just that morning to try something too.

Something moved. A sound, far away, but Cloud was sure he'd heard it. Every muscle stiffened, adrenaline pumping straight to his heart and tingling down to his toes. His right hand rested just over the top of his boot, fingertips just grazing the hilt of a small knife, clenching as he reacted automatically to the warning his brain was screaming. Cloud rose up on to his feet more securely, still low but more agile in this defensive crouch.

Just like they planned, Cloud backed up slowly, careful to keep his eyes on the door now. He'd be ready to jump and hide the moment it was touched, and his muscles twitched spasmodically in response. He took even steps, back bent to keep his whole body and all that bright, pointy hair below the top of the cubicles, until he reached the end of the aisle. He stopped before the entrance to the last cubicle in the row, then reached back with one foot, gripping the corner of the wall to maintain his balance, and tapped the glass of the office as quietly as possible with the toe of his boot.

Cloud's eyes remained fixed on the door, now farther away and his angle of the shadows gone. He wanted to wince at the sound of his hard boot hitting the glass, but then there was a resounding silence as the typing stopped, the whole room ringing as that quiet hum in the background disappeared. Cloud thought he heard the sound of cloth rustling as Reno dropped behind the desk, but he couldn't be sure. Reno reminded him of an eel sometimes: slick and agile.

There were sounds from the hallway filtering in now, and those took precedence in Cloud's mind, cloth and the muffled sound of boots on a carpet. His ears seemed to sharpen even more, almost painfully listening to the faintest movements. The hairs on his arms were rising, and the only thing he knew now was that all his focus was on the sound of boots as something powerful gripping him like he hadn't felt in ages.

Cloud tensed even more, his whole body ready and thrumming for action. He would have darted under the desk right near him, but the sudden movement would have alerted the guard. As the man stepped into the room, Cloud matched his footsteps, timing it so the sound would be hidden behind the man's own steps. It was a strange dance; Cloud carefully shifting sideways into the cubicle, staying low, while the guard took even steps. At last Cloud was at the edge of the desk. In one move he pivoted and sat, curling up. He grabbed the wastebasket by the bottom to avoid the plastic bag inside and shifted it in front of him to hide the glimmer of a reflected light from his boots.

Now his hands were shaking, his breath shallow. The footsteps approached, he could almost feel the floor shake with the man's weight. Cloud squeezed the toes of his boots with his hands so he wouldn't shake from the adrenaline rush of such near danger.

There wasn't any fear in his blood, his heart pounding fast but steadily. He wasn't afraid. All he felt was excitement, almost lust for a good fight, and heart-pumping action. His lips were pulling at a grin, giddiness mixing with adrenaline in his veins. Cloud wanted to peek, to test the boundaries, maybe even knock something over to give the guard a start. His fingers clenched around the ends of his boots tighter, the blood fighting to circulate properly.

Light breathing followed the footsteps. The guard must have been from the regulation army, because the beam of his flashlight fell into the aisle adjacent to Cloud's cubicle. Mako eyes would have been able to see just fine in this half-darkness, but the guard hardly even moved the light, only watching the floor as his boots and military pants walked past Cloud's hiding spot.

The way the sound retreated told Cloud he had reached the end of the aisle, and the blond's breathing sped up a bit in response as the guard turned around. The light slipped past the opening again, his boots following a moment later. Cloud's heart all but stopped, the urge to jump out of hiding hitting desperate heights when the guard flashed the light about a bit, but the man turned away after a moment. The footsteps trailed away and the door shut behind the guard with a definite click.

Silence reigned for a solid minute as Cloud tried to calm his wildly beating heart. That had been close. In more ways than one. A small part of Cloud was a little disappointed it hadn't been closer.

* * *

The cadet’s barracks were quiet, everyone fast asleep. Cloud and Reno had returned unscathed from their adventure, going back down the staircase and slipping back into the cadet barracks without another problem. They'd half-ran the whole way, and now flopped down on the couch at the end of their hall, their strength and the high of sneaking around beginning to wear off already. It wasn't until they made it into their halls that they could really celebrate.

"Man, I thought that guard might've spotted you. He had his flashlight going everywhere. He ran it over the blinds and I was lucky those were shut tight. Imagine if he'd caught my shadow! Must've had a sixth sense or something." Reno was still feeling a little euphoric at their success and the way his voice got louder and louder was evidence of it. He seemed far younger, more like a teenager when he spoke like that.

"Yeah, my heart nearly gave out when he gave a once over to the aisle I was in again." Cloud leaned back into the couch, relaxing all his stiff muscles. It felt good to be back safe and knowing that there wasn't an ounce of evidence you'd been there. True success.

"I'm just glad he didn't open the door of the office. I would've been spotted in a second." Reno wiped imaginary sweat off his brow, though the collar of his pajamas had some on it. Clearly he'd been having as much fun as Cloud.

"You got what you wanted right?" Cloud wondered if he should encourage these hacking skills. It was something Turks wanted usually. Vincent had been exceptionally good at it with older computers. By the time Cloud had freed Vincent from that coffin, all his old "back doors" had been found out. Now though, Cloud wasn't sure if he should try and push Reno away from the Turks. It wasn't an easy life, and though Reno had made some kind of family there, it was still a sacrifice.

Turk-life was essentially an undercover agent, assassin, and a diplomat all rolled into one. The requirements were nasty, the training was practically impossible, the job was undesirable, and Reno would have to give up a full identity for it. His whole history would be destroyed to keep his identity and skills secret. And their friendship might suffer since SOLDIER and the Turks weren't exactly the best of friends. But was it really Cloud's call at all? Did he have the right to take that chance away from Reno?

"Yeah, lemme tell you what I found." Reno sat up more fully on the couch, ignoring Cloud's spacing out. He was used to it by now, and hardly thought anything of it anymore. "Turns out they're making some kind of huge weapon in Junon. Monstrous. I couldn't get the plans for it, that was super locked-up and probably only the top engineer and head of the weapons department could see it. Didn't want to risk too much on our first go after all."

Reno's eyes were glimmering as he recalled the escapade, hand gestures and all as he gave Cloud more details into how he hacked the files and what he found than the blond could ever need. The redhead was terribly proud of his accomplishment, and Cloud was willing to humor him. He was probably right though in that the top engineer and Scarlet were the only ones with the plans.

_Ugh, Scarlet…_

"It was too technical most of it, but from the sounds of it it's mad powerful. Who knows what they'll use it for? I guess it if rotates you could shoot at something across the sea, but what's out there? I hope they don't try to blow up the Gold Saucer. I gotta see it before I die."

Reno's ramblings were losing Cloud as sleep made his eyes itch and burn. The Gold Saucer, huh? Reno would certainly see it. And love it. He'd probably throw all his money away there too.

Sleep was calling, Cloud could feel it as he eyes tried to close, his body shutting down slowly. The sudden drop in adrenaline was unfamiliar to Cloud, something he could hardly remember from his childhood. Mako didn't wear off for hours or suddenly plummet like that, so the sensation felt very old, long forgotten. The couch was proving to be awfully comfortable, it's cushions soft and worn, and he felt lethargic and relaxed. He could just rest and let Reno talk away…

Reno kicked Cloud in the shin hard enough to make him jerk in response. He bolted up and in one move had launched himself off the couch and into a defensive stance, hands up and ready. Reno was midway through a yawn though, his eyes shut. He didn't think a thing of Cloud's abrupt move, too tired to really give it a thought. "Get some sleep. We've got conditioning tomorrow so you'll need it too."

Cloud and Reno headed back to the bunker, each falling into his bed, already dreaming as their heads hit the pillow.

* * *

"Cloud! What is that!?" Dan's wild pointing at Cloud's head had the blond momentarily stunned. It had been so unexpected, right in the middle of their spar, that Cloud hadn't even had the chance to figure out what triggered it.

"What?"

"Dan's gone totally nuts. Hallucinating now!" Reno called from across the room, pausing from his own spar to taunt him. Dan ignored the jab though, staring over Cloud's shoulder. It clicked a moment later.

"You've got an earring!"

Unconsciously Cloud reached up to finger his left ear, the mark still a little red from the day before. "Yeah, I just got it."

Dan still looked a little shocked. "I thought only girls got piercings."

"What planet are you from? Every SOLDIER's got at least one." Reno had somehow managed to gravitate from across the room to right next to them in about thirty seconds. The instructor had his back turned, a stroke of luck that probably saved Reno's hide. The redhead would probably have been physically dragged back to his mat, partner in tow, with a lecture for running across the room to gossip.

"I certainly haven't seen any-"

"They do." Cloud's abrupt remark cut short what would have been another verbal war. These two couldn't seem to do anything else when together. "Let's just finish. You're lucky Instructor Mesk hasn't come over here yet."

Reno turned away after a beat, grumbling the whole time. His partner look distinctly annoyed to have been so easily abandoned. Cloud ignored Reno's melodrama, turning back to Dan and putting both fists up again in the traditional ready position.

Dan responded after a moment, still processing what had happened. His look was a little vacant, but Cloud ignored it. He'd been just as shocked by some of the tattoos and places for piercings when he'd come to Midgar, so he found it easy to excuse Dan's innocence. He'd been the same once.

It was Wednesday, hand-to-hand combat day, and Dan had finally managed to beat Reno to be Cloud's partner. The blond had done his best to ignore their competition, finding it uncomfortable and awkward to be at the center of it. He'd even gone and partnered up with other people some days if it got to be too much. Today had been relatively smooth until Dan's outburst.

Hit, duck, shoulder roll, clip the knuckles, catch and move, duck and shift right-

It was a mantra Cloud kept up, a steady, objective commentary of all his moves that kept him focused on the here and now. His body was getting more attuned to attacks and defensive counters, and his muscle memory seemed to be coming back faster than expected. Zack was helping immensely with this, and despite Cloud's initial nervousness at one-on-one lessons, things were working out so far.

Reno was still faster than him, that whole eel thing again with his sometimes-liquid movements and improvised combinations that caught everybody off-guard. They made good sparring partners, but Dan wasn't too bad either. He was stiff when he fought though, and he fought right by the book. There were moments though when his quick reflexes and sharp jabs with just his fingers really got to an opponent. Still, by Cloud's standards he'd be easy to take down in a real fight.

"So…" Dan was panting a bit to keep up. Cloud just kept pushing the pace. "Why'd you get it?"

Dodge left, grab the bicep, snap the arm back and duck and whirl for a kick to the back-

"Huh?" Cloud wasn't paying attention to Dan's talk at all. He had missed that last one with a well-timed duck by Dan and that had jarred him enough to realize Dan was speaking to him. The kid muttered sometimes to himself, and Cloud had grown used to it enough to tune it out.

This lesson in hand-to-hand combat was one of their best yet. The cadets were finally working more to develop offensive attacks and counters in combinations, using multiple moves and variations on traditional ones. Cloud was thankful for this because it meant more interesting matches and he didn't have to hold back quite so much.

"Why did you the piercing?" Dan winced almost immediately after he asked, Cloud's fist connecting with his ribcage a little harder than intended.

"My friend wanted me to." A half-truth, not quite a lie.

"All of a sudden?" Dan swung out a little more than necessary, the circle of his fist wide enough to give Cloud a good opening. The blond planted a powerful kick to Dan's stomach, the boy sinking in on himself almost instantly. That might have been a little harder than it should have been, and Cloud immediately felt a little bad for hurting the kid.

"Ah, sorry." Cloud rubbed his hands down his pants once, belatedly realizing he should offer to help Dan up. He quickly brought his hand out, politely helping him to stand. Dan rubbed his bruised belly, face scrunched up in more pain that he probably was really in.

"You two done?" Without waiting for an answer, Instructor Mesk clapped his hand loudly and called for a break. "Water! You got ten!"

Cloud approached the water cooler quickly and retrieved his water bottle. The sweaty boys tended to congregate around the cooler, and even though the room was large and airy the odor would linger there for a while. Cloud left that circle and drifted over to one side, keeping his distance from the rest.

Reno joined him not a moment later. The redhead splashed some water on two fingers and dabbed at his sweaty brow. His hair was pulled up into a ponytail and much darker underneath. His partner had a lot of stamina and had clearly kept him going. "You gonna keep that simple stud or get something else?"

Reno had spotted it at breakfast but hadn't said anything. Cloud hadn't mentioned it at all, not even to brag. Reno was going to ask, poke it to make sure it was real and not some lame joke of Cloud's SOLDIER friend or something, but he'd forgotten. Then Cloud acted like he'd always had it, not bringing it up at all or touching it, and Reno was nearly convinced he _had_ always had it.

The redhead shook his head mentally. It fit the blond perfectly, that's all.

Cloud finished sipping his water, thinking about what to say. The stud he had was just for new piercings, and he wanted something like his old one. He'd gotten attached to that wolf design. "I'll get something else later."

"I know a nice jewelry shop under the plate that has some sweet stuff. They even do custom if you got the Gil." Reno cut his eyes at Dan as he approached. His gaze was hostile, but Cloud ignored it. That was between Reno and Dan, not him.

"Only if you'll teach me some there." They'd really only done some basics for parkour, stretching and easy strength stuff on Saturday, since neither of them had anything to do and no money to spend. The jumping had been fun, but more for Reno than Cloud. Jumping around like that, even with all the military training they went through had been painful, and not just because of their exhausted muscles. The landings Reno made look easy were actually very difficult, as Cloud discovered. He had trouble keeping his momentum from propelling him away and into the floor, especially when he had to stop fully on the balls of his feet. He'd managed it once or twice, but absorbing the shock wasn't easy while maintaining his balance either. Reno could land on the edge on just the balls of his feet, bending his knees to almost a right angle without falling. Waving his arms around to keep his balance just made his feel silly, and it hadn't helped most the time. The practice had been good for perfecting how to fall without hurting himself, though Cloud still managed to acquire some new bruises.

The session hadn't been without merit. By the end he was starting to get the hang of it, and while Reno laughed at him through most of it, he'd hadn't been a half-bad teacher either.

"Sure sure." Reno waved his hand as he said it. Cloud's thoughts skipped to Aeris at the thought of Midgar, but he wasn't sure if he might get the chance to slip away again. And he definitely wasn't bringing Reno to meet her.

"So Cloud, you know monsters could pull on that thing, right?" Dan indicated the earring with one hand. For some reason it seemed to be bothering him. Cloud's mouth twitched at that. He'd been plenty weirded out when he'd seen his first real tattoo: a giant tiger clambering up someone's back.

Reno cut in before Cloud could say a word. "What monster's got small enough claws to grab it? And that's only dangling ones idiot."

"Hey, I'm just looking out for Cloud! He should consider everything before he does something so, so…permanent!" Dan's defense of Cloud and concern for him was endearing on some level, but it was mostly annoying.

"Cloud's an adult man, not some baby. It's up to him so stop bugging him over it." The same sentiment went for Reno too.

It had been Zack that had taken Cloud to get the piercing done. The SOLDIER had found Cloud during lunch and had dragged him off back to the bunker, making a bit of a scene in the cafeteria again. Zack had made it clear he was a little upset Cloud hadn't told him about his birthday, even if the blond had obviously been in a bad mood that whole day. When Zack pressed him about why though, Cloud, feeling both guilt and irritation at Zack's nosiness, had been silent. The blond had been worried though that he'd offended Zack, and he might have now that he really considered it, but Zack was great at hiding things behind a smile. The SOLDIER let it drop, but not without wrangling a promise out of Cloud to not complain when Zack threw him a huge 18th birthday party.

The SOLDIER had also given Cloud quite a scare bringing up his birthday, and when the blond had finally gotten his voice back to ask how, he almost wished he hadn't asked.

But then, he wouldn't have known.

"Sephiroth told me." That's what Zack had said. _The General_ had told him.

Cloud had gone hot and cold on that one, and even now he felt a chill shudder through his spine. There'd been pleasure there, no doubt about it. He was thrilled to know Sephiroth was interested in him. There was horror too though, and that was proving to be the stronger emotion.

_Was he suspicious?_

When Cloud had gotten up the courage to ask why Sephiroth knew, Zack told him the man had only said, "I make a point of knowing my subordinates," which had made Cloud frown the same way Zack had. That wasn't an answer to either of their questions.

Either way, Zack wanted to celebrate, so after their lesson that evening he'd rushed Cloud into the showers and they'd left Shinra. Zack had taken him out to a little noodle shop in town, and then, maybe because Zack's presence was still a little overwhelming sometimes, Cloud had admitted he would like to get a piercing. He really just wanted something to physically differentiate himself now from the teenager he had been, and Zack jumped on to the idea immediately.

Soon enough, Zack had led the way to a small tattoo parlor above the plate. It was unfamiliar to Cloud, though Zack was perfectly at ease. But then, he almost always was.

Cloud hadn't even thought there'd been any tattoo parlors on top of the plate, but apparently there was one. It wasn't in a back alley or on a mangy street, but on a popular sidewalk amidst boutiques, salons, men's shoe stores, and what looked like a custom tailor's shop. It didn't even stick out: no heavy, Goth or punk images in the window or smoking teenagers lingering on the doorstep. The front window wasn't covered in tattoo designs or metal band posters. It was normal. In fact, the only part of it that indicated it was a tattoo parlor at all was the sign, the name along with a simple dragon design:

_Rich Mattie's Tattoo Parlor_

It didn't seem like the kind of business that would be up here, but with lots of hardy and rough SOLDIERs just a step away, there was plenty of business to go around. Zack attested to that with one piercing in an ear and a tattoo of a sword on the back of his neck. Zack let Cloud touch that sword, admiring how the skin wasn't raised and the perfect detail of the hilt that had matched the Buster Sword. The blond couldn't remember ever seeing it before, guessing it had disappeared after their time with Hojo. Five years in a mako tank would do that.

"Oi, Cloud, let's go." Dan tugged on his arm and let go almost immediately as Cloud pulled away instinctively. Their water break was over, and Cloud had just zoned out of it completely. He took his last sip before setting down the bottle against the wall. The blond followed Dan back on to the mats, this time with Reno on their left. The redhead glared at the group that tried to say they'd been on that mat, and they left fairly quickly. Sometimes Reno still made people nervous because he was straight out of the slums. Being friendly with Cloud, the nobody from a little town out of nowhere, didn't seem to hurt his image at all. Either that or he didn't let it.

The instructors gave a brief explanation of what to do this time in groups of threes, and the fights started again. Cloud was still distracted though, so he let Dan and Reno practice first while he ostensibly refereed the match and noted strengths and weaknesses or something equally mundane. Cloud had precious few memories of good times with Zack, so he wanted to cherish the ones he had.

The tattoo shop had been very clean but dark, with designs and photographs lining the walls up to the ceiling. The man behind the counter looked every ounce the tattoo artist, covered with all kinds of images crawling up his arms and torso, his face and ears decorated with piercings of all sizes. He wasn't the kind of guy you expected to see on the plate.

All the SOLDIERs came here for their piercings, Zack had told him, because the place had the right machine to make the hole. With all the mako in a SOLDIER, it was hard to make a proper hole without it trying to heal back up too quickly. Plus, this guy was a professional, very quick with his hands, and he ran a clean store.

The guy had recognized Zack, but unlike with Reno in Wall Market, Cloud hadn't been forgotten for a second. He'd been introduced almost immediately, and the man had cracked a grin so wide Cloud thought it might be fake. Rich, the owner, had been perfectly amiable and knew how to set aside any fears for a first-time customer—except of course this time hadn't been Cloud's first.

When Cloud had gotten the piercing before, he'd been in Midgar under the plate not long after Zack's death. He'd done it in honor of Zack, who also had one in his left ear. He remembered the seedy place he'd gotten it done only vaguely. The guy, despite appearances, had known what he was doing, even if his bedside manner left a lot to be desired. It probably helped too that Cloud had come in with the buster sword strapped to his back.

It had been strange to be at that tattoo parlor with Zack, seeing the smiling face and listening with half an ear to his inane chatter. The experience was almost the opposite of his first; he'd gone in depressed, alone, and angry. Here he was excited, happy, and had Zack talking his ear off right next to him. It had come full circle.

The SOLDIER had laughed when Cloud asked for one in his left ear like Zack's. Rich had just grinned at them and winked, but Cloud didn't care. Zack was beaming at him, excited as much as Cloud was, though he showed it more.

It had been swift and practically painless. If there was one thing Cloud was glad for, his pain threshold was far higher than it had been when he'd been a cadet before. But then, that was a psychological thing and his mind wasn't the same as before either.

Zack had paid before Cloud could, insisting it was a birthday present. Cloud thought it was probably the best one he'd ever gotten. Zack had admired it, just as pleased with his idea as Cloud had for getting it. Nothing pleased Zack quite as much as knowing he'd made someone happy.

Cloud was jerked out of his reverie as Dan tapped him on the shoulder. "Tired? You okay?" Cloud shook his head and moved on to the mat, ignoring Dan's concern. He put his fists up in a ready position and narrowed his focus on Reno for the spar. This was time to improve, not daydream.


	14. An Extension of Yourself

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cloud trains with Zack and has a disagreement with Reno, but at least there's Snickers.

If there was one thing going right in all the mess that was cadet training, it was his practice sessions with Zack. Thursday's had been particularly rough, but worth it, even if that meant Friday's classes weren't quite as much fun when he was still sore all over.

"Cloud, duck down some more. Even if you can't see 'em doesn't mean they can't see your chocobo hair." Reno was hissing under his breath and making furtive motions with his hands. Cloud's seriousness towards some lessons seemed to have rubbed off a bit. Reno had called Cloud "hardcore" and a "wannabe", but he was beginning to mimic him regardless.

It hadn't bothered Cloud that the other students resented his attitude towards classes; he figured it was only their loss in the future if they slacked off now. Still, it pleased him that Reno was slowly losing that immature edge. The group's resentment might have been caused because of the blond's sudden improvement, but the redhead was starting to take some cues and even he was showing signs of improvement. When Reno was as serious as Cloud about it, they could get quite a bit done when working together. The way AVALANCHE had done before.

The longer Cloud lay on his stomach like he was, the deeper the butt of his rifle dug into his side. He'd drifted off a bit, but thinking of his time with AVALANCHE and what they had accomplished together reminded him of other horrors, and he'd rather come back to reality than follow those thoughts.

He and Reno, along with four other boys, were hiding behind a low wall marking the edge of the fifth practice ground. More open fields were spread beyond it, but the boundaries of the exercise were right where Cloud and his group were crouched. The exercise today was in stealth, and each team had to retrieve an object and reach a designated spot without getting caught. They were sneaking towards the canteen they were supposed to steal, and still fairly well ahead of the competition. They were waiting for the guards to switch in this area, but someone else had triggered an alarm, so it was delayed.

Reno was quiet and still beside him, not fidgeting or muttering like the other boys. Cloud was thankful for Reno's attentiveness to the situation today, because the blond's mind couldn't seem to completely focus on what he needed to do. The heat, his lack of sleep last night, and the lack of movement now as the group waited weren't helping the situation.

The training sessions with Zack were changing, and Cloud had a hard time focusing on these classes when Zack's lessons were so much more useful. Tuesday's lesson had quickly evolved from being so much about technical details, movement and basics to more natural sparring, practicing combinations and working on quicker counterattacks and reflexes. It was a little more dangerous for Cloud's position if he intended to hide anything, but so much more worth it. Never dull anymore, that's for sure.

" _You might not have much in strength, but you certainly have the speed to keep up. Don't block if you don't have to—your opponent can't hit you if you're not there."_

Zack had spent most of the session calling out advice between slashes of their swords, throwing out useful tips he'd picked up on the battlefield. As they'd fought Cloud had tried to consciously incorporate what Zack said. Their swords had struck less often and they'd tussled more on the floor, mixing hand-to-hand combat into swordplay. Their old lessons of block - parry - parry - attack - block - counterattack were gone. It had been exhilarating to break form to try something new.

" _Exhale on the attack. More power, more momentum, and a more even breathing pattern. That'll keep you up and fighting longer."_

They were both so caught up in fighting on that Tuesday that the session had long gone past curfew. Zack had to escort him back to his own bunker because midnight was approaching. Their spar had lasted far longer than any before too, and Zack's mentoring nature that might have stopped the sessions before was receding. Cloud sensed Zack was beginning to see him on a different level. No longer was their relationship characterized as cadet to First Class, but now new warrior to old.

Being Zack's equal was something Cloud had longed for, and now it might actually do him a disservice. The last thing he needed was to be dragged back to the General's office for any kind of suspicion. And yet, despite that looming fear, Cloud was still excited at the prospect of working alongside Zack at a higher level. He had never gotten the chance before.

" _Taller opponents have a longer reach, but they often leave their legs exposed. Head and torso aren't the only places to strike. And the point isn't to hit the sword; it's to hit the thing behind it. Beast or human doesn't matter. Blade or claws, same goes. If you can get around the blade, it doesn't matter what's in their hand."_

The session on Thursday had been the most exciting and hardest yet. Zack had shown up with something new, something Cloud knew intimately: a buster sword.

"Practice with just a broadsword is like eating only waffles: unhealthy." He elaborated with a grin and a powerful swing of the blade. Seeing Zack's old buster sword was akin to the first time he'd seen Zack again here. It the one that Zack would give Cloud on that dreaded cliff. He could still remember all the details and grooves of the rusted version, the way the grip felt and the weight of blade. Cloud had called it _the_ Buster Sword for a reason.

That sword had seen all kinds of horrible and wonderful things with Cloud, lived through all his adventures. Cloud had dragged it through the desert to Midgar, killed Sephiroth with it, and battled all over the world with it. He could almost see Zack's hand perfectly fitted to the hilt, the easy confidence he swung it with, the smooth movement of the sword cutting the air…

It would never looked better than when it was in Zack's hands.

It had been Cloud's. Given to him on Zack's deathbed on that cliff, his last request no man could have refused. But deep inside, Cloud had never felt worthy of it. That sword had been passed down through a line of powerful men, ones who upheld friendship and had proven their strength and mettle through countless trials.

And Cloud felt nothing like that. He'd stolen Zack's strength, his sword, his entire life, and the only thing that had been left of the real Cloud was humiliation at his own weakness, and regret. He hadn't even fought for friendship or the thought of peace. He'd hunted and killed Sephiroth because of personal obligation, love, and revenge. He'd done it for his own peace of mind, not for anyone else's, and he hadn't even accomplished that. No, his motivations hadn't been worthy of that weapon.

Zack chuckled, smiling widely at Cloud with an emotion the blond couldn't identify in his eyes. "This is _Galatine_. My mentor trained me against this blade, and I worked hard so I could fight equally with him. This was his sword passed to me. Maybe if I die in battle I'll pass it to you too someday."

Cloud was blindsided by both pleasure at Zack's acknowledgement and fear if it ever came true, and he accidentally loosened his hold on his sword. It clattered to the ground loudly, shaking the floor at Cloud's feet. The blond's throat tightened up dangerously. He couldn't refuse such an honorable request, and yet Cloud desperately wanted to. Such responsibility was something he hadn't felt ready for the first time, and something he felt he might never be ready for.

Cloud managed to swallow thickly, but his feet were leaden and the muscles in his arms jumped they were so tense. But Zack's face broke out into a grin, seeing Cloud's alarm. The raven-haired man laughed loudly and rubbed the back of his head. "No one's immortal Cloud. It'll happen someday." He didn't seem too worried though; more sheepish he'd given the blond such a scare.

The SOLDIER's words couldn't be heard above the pounding rush in Cloud's ears though. Zack's smiling face overlapped with his visage in death: grisly and peaceful all at once. No, Cloud didn't ever want the Buster Sword back if it meant Zack's life.

"…Don't …Don't joke about stuff like that." He turned his eyes away from the bright edge of the buster sword, its tip resting on the floor as Zack leaned on it. Cloud instead focused his eyes on the line of light reflected from it on the floor. It extended all the way to the wall, like a beam of sunlight. He wondered if maybe the serrated edge on two of First Tsurugi's blades would make a jagged line.

"Aw Cloud, I didn't mean it like that." Zack walked forward and his large hand landed on to Cloud's head. Any other day Cloud might have been insulted at the gesture, feeling like a dog, but now he felt a little better for it. Zack's hand was warm and strong, heavy and calloused. He wasn't going anywhere for the time being, and hopefully not for a long time. Not if Cloud could help it.

They'd sparred then, and the depressing atmosphere had lifted as soon as Zack accidentally broke Cloud's training sword with Galatine. The pieces had splintered off, and the ravaged ends were like the uneven teeth of a Behemoth. One broken-off shard had cut Cloud's arm as it went by, slicing through his sleeve and leaving a bloody trail behind.

Zack had apologized a hundred times, his face a little paler and eyes wide. He looked like a child whose joke had gone a step too far. But Cloud knew what happened with swords, and he'd been cut to ribbons before so this was nothing. He had just rubbed the blood away with the sleeve of his shirt and shrugged it off. He'd lifted up the destroyed sword, laughing a bit at the absurdity of what had happened. He went to retrieve another, swinging the broken one and laughing as it made a whistling sound through the air.

After Zack's initial shock at hurting Cloud, the man had relaxed. He didn't manage to completely hide the odd look in his eyes as he watched Cloud laugh at the sword. The blond didn't seem to notice though, and Zack couldn't really complain. It was a shallow cut and Cloud shrugged it off.

Catching up with Cloud, he joked, "That's probably the sharpest that blade has ever been," nodding to the broken one Cloud had discarded at the side of the room. The First leaned on Galatine, crossing his arms around her guard-less hilt. "Guess we'll have to make you work with an old-fashioned iron sword then. 'Least you'll work on upper body strength. These carbon steel swords are…" he paused, searching for a word to describe the cheap swords Shinra let cadets train with, "…functional."

"Functional?" Cloud had echoed followed with a snort. He was standing by the shelf where more swords rested, picking out one that looked tough enough to withstand Galatine's might. Carbon steel swords weren't bad; they were certainly better than the display stainless steel ones cadets were often tricked into buying. The really cheap ones weren't even folded. Those, Cloud could probably break over his knee even without mako. The Shinra standard-issue swords weren't very flexible but they did get the job done. Sometimes.

Zack tossed him a set of keys. "Here Cloud. The closet over there's got some better swords." He indicated with a nod of his head to a closet off to the side. Cloud unlocked the door, the little room dark without light. "Grab a flexible steel sword. Those are the best they've got here."

Cloud pulled one out and tested its weight and balance. "What's your's made of?" The one in Cloud's hand, the blond noticed, was a little off-kilter. The handle had been dented at some point, and that put the balance off. As he appraised the others while pretending to study the one in hand, the way an amateur might dwell on it just to be sure, Cloud took a good sweep of the closet. There weren't a great variety of weapons here, mostly swords of different make and size. Any fancier and rare weapons were probably personally owned and stored. Still, the weapons here were of fair quality, and probing around later might be worth it.

"Damascus steel."

Cloud put the sword down and reached for another. He'd already known that, but as a cadet he wouldn't have. "Expensive right?"

"Very. Worth it, but takes a lot of saving to get it. You could probably buy the chocobo farm for the cost of one sword of it."

Cloud said nothing as he took his chosen sword back over to Zack. He actually had no idea what First Tsurugi was made out of. The sword didn't rust and never needed sharpening, and after cutting through almost any material he'd given up on guessing.

Their spar continued almost immediately, but more furiously. At first Cloud was cautious, his blows careful, testing the bounds of Zack's reach, the angle of his swings. Much of Zack's style was eerily similar to his own, and Cloud was catching on to the patterns and repetitive moves quickly. That had impressed Zack immensely, and the SOLDIER pushed him for more.

By the end of the session it was three hours past curfew, and Cloud was in desperate need of a shower. Zack had driven him hard, and by the end it felt like he was only barely restraining himself from using his enhancements unfairly. Cloud had responded in kind, and though he had trouble keeping up or taking the offensive from Zack, he'd managed a good defense throughout. It hadn't occurred to him until his walk back that it might have been suspicious.

"Man, you're going to be sick when you're in SOLDIER." Zack was only panting lightly, but his grin was brighter than the lights in the room. He was feverishly elated and he swung Galatine up to rest on his back as he walked the now exhausted Cloud back to his quarters.

Cloud had been glowing inside as they walked, until that comment reminded him he might have let something slip. Looking back on it though Zack hadn't been acting suspicious at all, and Cloud had let those worries rest once he'd thought about it this morning. At least Zack was the kind of man who would confront him face to face if he thought something was strange.

And that was a relief. As long as it didn't happen, Cloud could rest a little easier.

* * *

"Cloud, ixnay on the running-behind-the-trees plan. There's some people over there and I wouldn't doubt they'd shove us right through the tree line. If we follow the wall some more there might be another opening." Reno pulled his ponytail over his shoulder, the back of his neck beaded with sweat. The sun was unbelievably hot today, and Cloud could feel the heat against the back of his shoulders and neck. He would definitely be burnt tomorrow. Reno might match his hair if they couldn't hide in some shade soon.

"Sure. Just crawl on your stomach when we get around that bend. The wall's almost half as high there." Cloud flattened his hair down with his hand, ignoring the heat of his burning scalp and the sweat creeping into his collar. His blond hair was drooping ridiculously, and if they had to do any serious running it could become a problem. A bead of sweat on Reno's face followed the slightly indented trail of one of his tattoos. The heat never got this bad under the plate, the constant shadow keeping it cool most of the time.

"Man, I think he dehydrated and passed out." Reno nudged one of the other boys on his team with his foot. The kid was sprawled on his stomach, face turned to the side with his mouth wide open. A blade of grass with a tiny bug on top was almost in his mouth.

* * *

Friday night dinner was hot dogs and hamburgers, and Reno scarfed down two of each in the first ten minutes. Cloud had eaten his hamburger at a more sedate pace, though Dan made constant comments on the state of the meat of his hot dog throughout dinner, which was mildly off-putting.

Eventually Reno and Cloud escaped dinner and headed in the general direction of the training areas, having shaken Dan off earlier. The brown-haired boy had disagreed with Reno's idea of picking the armory lock—actually a cover Reno had used to talk to Cloud—and had protested the plan by refusing to go.

"So what do you want?" Cloud didn't dilly-dally with words. Reno had been building up to something throughout the afternoon and Cloud's patience had worn thin. The redhead had any number of chances to speak up but he'd held his tongue. That worried the blond.

"Well, I got another question. And since today's got no moon and I know a guy who knows a guy on watch—"

"What's the question." It was more of a statement than an inquiry, and Reno noticed right away.

"Not sleep so good last night? You did come in late." He gave Cloud a one-over, leering at him for just a second before pulling back. "Naw, you didn't. Just toyed with you then?"

"No. What do you want?"

"Snippy huh? Fine. You got all tomorrow with me underground if you help out. Tonight."

Cloud's eyes narrowed even more than they had been at Reno's lewd questions. If the redhead was springing this on him now, the plan was probably risky at best or involved something highly illegal at worst. Even though the danger got Cloud's blood going it also made him put on the reins. "How bad?"

Reno leaned back on his heels, resting his upper arms against the wall of the empty classroom they were occupying. He stood just outside of the light from the window, his sleeves rolled up on his uniform, and his hair strategically unkempt and falling out of the tie. His mischievous smile and the disarming stance made Cloud wary since the blond knew he was deliberately hiding how he felt.

"You know Heidegger? That guy with the weird laugh and the mean right hook? And the totally hot bitch that runs the weapons department? I want some info on them."

"Heidegger and Scarlet." Cloud's disbelief was clear in his voice. Any deep or personal information other than the publicly known was hard to find on high Shinra executives—and those two were among the highest. How the hell did Reno expect to find anything on them? And why?

"Yeah yeah, all their nasty little details and all them skeletons are real hard to find, I know. But that's just asking for people to go digging Cloud!"

"I don't even want to know the plan." Cloud turned to walk away, intent to let this particular intrigue of Reno's lay to rest. He wasn't going to dig around in those kinds of files, and it wasn't like there was anything to learn from it anyway.

"Hey!" Reno caught Cloud by the back of his sleeve, stopping him in his tracks. "It's not that bad. And if you don't help I ain't showing you anything tomorrow." He looked like he was grasping for straws, already getting desperate for Cloud's help.

Reno had certainly grown up when he was with the Turks then. "Parkour isn't worth that risk."

* * *

That evening Cloud returned to his bunker alone. Cloud's refusal had put Reno in a bad mood and he'd left in the other direction. Walking always helped him to think things through, and he needed some peace of mind right now. His wanderings led him all the way to Shinra Headquarters. The mindless buzz of quiet voices was the perfect backdrop as he mulled over answers.

He wanted—no, needed—that information. Heidegger and Scarlet were integral parts of Shinra, and being out of the loop on even basic information on them wasn't something Reno liked. If he could just hack a high enough computer he'd be in, but that wasn't possible alone. And what was Cloud's problem? He could use all those nifty skills to make this work, and it was just more of challenge. He'd really put his foot down on it and the redhead was having trouble seeing why.

Maybe it was the specific people. Should he have not mentioned their names? No, Cloud would have probably demanded to know anyway. Maybe that last time had scared him? No, Cloud had been elated on their way back, looser and excited. Hm…

Reno's feet knew these paths by heart. He'd walked them hundreds of times before, chatting up old acquaintances and generally getting to know the area. He never came on a schedule and always took different routes, but it was worth it to hear the gossip behind Shinra.

"Reno, you out tonight? Gotta watch the first floor back hallway—Grieg's on duty there." The friendly guard hailed Reno down with a small wave, and the redhead obligingly went over. Guards like Marceto, gamblers at heart and good talkers, were Reno's best friends when he was having trouble. Even just tidbits of knowledge could sometimes be the key to getting around Shinra.

"Thanks, Marceto, I'll stay out of there. I was wondering if you knew anything on some First Class SOLDIERs? They pass by here a lot?"

Marceto's positioning tonight was by the back stairs of the second floor. The first six floors were the largest in Shinra, housing more than just offices but basic stores and conference rooms. Those were good areas to stalk around in the evening before the Headquarters started the night shift because people lingered picking up groceries or supplies here, and that meant eavesdropping.

They were also the floors everyone had to pass through to leave. And that meant Cloud's SOLDIER might have passed by. Reno had no real means of getting good information on Cloud. Other than the obvious—his cadet profile, which had been laughably easy to hack—Cloud was a closed door. He never talked about himself and he Reno was finding it difficult getting him to open up. To get anything on Cloud therefore, Reno thought the SOLDIER might be the key. And as Lieutenant General he was likely privy to things Reno would kill for.

The thought of Cloud having some big secret had been haunting Reno for weeks now. As long as he'd gotten to know the blond, he'd found there to be something off with the kid—just too many quirks popping up all at once. Reno had kept it a little side mission for himself: find out Cloud's secret.

Despite how he acted and how people thought of him, Reno had no intention of blackmailing Cloud with that information. The blond was growing on him a lot, and it wasn't like Cloud had anything Reno wanted. That, however, didn't discount a certain amount of arm-twisting. But he could justify it by saying he could better plan, and even guard it, if he knew.

Well, that, and he just couldn't sate his curiosity.

Marceto was a bit long-winded, since he didn't get much chance to gossip, but he got around to lamenting that no SOLDIER Firsts had come by, complaining of boredom. He said people had gotten into using the newly replaced elevators, so the only person that came by anymore was Reeve Tuesti, head of the Urban Development department.

"Really?" Reno leaned back on his heels, playing the part perfectly of an interested, but not overly so, friend. "He walks?"

"Said it was better for the environment. And his waist." Marceto chuckled at that.

"He's a funny guy?" _Environment huh?_

"No, not really. He has moments, but he's a fairly nice guy."

Reno nodded in response, but knew Marceto didn't know anything else. He only saw Tuesti in passing after all, and Marceto wasn't the cleverest of men.

Reno thanked the guard and mulled over what he'd learned as he changed course and headed for the stairs.

Reeve Tuesti was a high-ranked man, being Minister for Housing and Urban Development, and had been a member of the executive boards for a good while. Which meant Tuesti was at the executive board meetings with people like the General, the creepy Hojo, Heidegger and Scarlet.

_Perfect._

If there were anyone who knew details about the last two it would be Tuesti. He had access and time, because Reno couldn't recall Urban Development doing _anything_ all his life. The department had designed Midgar and the reactors, Reno knew that much, but that had been ages ago, and what had it done since? And if Tuesti cared enough about the environment to walk down the stairs from his fifty-some-odd floor, Reno might already have the upper hand.

It would be luck if he ran into Tuesti tonight, but Reno was willing to try it. Cloud's exercise regime was working for the blond anyway, so if Reno had to do this every night then he might as well make it worth his while.

It was on the thirty-eighth floor when Reno heard another's footsteps. The redhead had been moving steadily higher, taking care to keep his footsteps even and quiet. Guards this high were posted fairly close to the stairs, and Reno didn't want his boots to alert them. He could claim to be exercising—he was a cadet trying to be a SOLDIER after all—but somehow he didn't think they'd buy that. It might work for Cloud, but not for Reno.

"Evenin' sir." Reno slowed to a walk as he turned to the flight the other man was on.

He was a couple of steps higher than Reno and standing beneath a florescent light that did nothing for his pale skin. He had a crop of dark brown hair swept through with fingers so many times there were shadowed runs in it. Stress related habit clearly. He had the makings of a beard and mustache, but the hair was sparse and thin. Reno wondered if he rubbed his chin and the hair came out, or if he had just started to grow it out.

He had on dark navy slacks, with a white button-up shirt and tie that was a little tattered near the ends and missing both cufflinks. Tuesti obviously didn't care much for his appearance, though the necklace he wore under his collar, the chain just peeking out, gave way to his wealth: gold, probably real given the simplicity of the design.

The man's suit jacket wasn't really a jacket so much as a long, blue overcoat. The blue was actually a shade lighter than his pants, though considering his dress already he probably cared as much as Reno did. It had a high collar and some kind of crosshatch buttoning, but Reno couldn't see the details since it was folded in his arms.

Reno suppressed a grin as he recognized the executive from what publicity photos he'd done, and nodded his head politely. Tuesti mimicked the action but he stopped walking altogether.

"And what are you out for at this time, young man?" He had a soft, friendly voice that surprised Reno a bit. It was the kind of voice suited for teaching or some other scholarly pursuit, not for working at Shinra.

"I was headin' to the roof." Reno faked a wince as his accent came out a little more strongly than intended. _Let's see what Tuesti makes of a street rat…_

"The roof? Why?" Tuesti seemed genuinely interested and that was just what Reno was going for. Poor guy never saw it coming.

"To see the stars. Can't see 'em under the plate and it's too foggy on the ground."

Tuesti's face brightened in an instant and Reno knew he'd won.

"Do you do this often? And you said under the plate? So you've lived there and now intend to join Shinra? I've heard there's a place where a woman grows plants, is that true?" Tuesti's eagerness would have been endearing if Reno hadn't been aiming for it. The man wasn't cut out for Shinra if he was this easy to read. How had he lasted so long?

"Lived there all my life. And yeah, she says love makes 'em grow." Reno was pulling bullshit out of ass at the last part. He'd heard of the woman that grew plants, but he'd never spoken to her and he'd only seen them once. Figured she'd be meat for Shinra if she got too popular.

"Tell me, um…" Tuesti's polite pause held a little longer than it should have. Down under the plate people weren't nearly this polite. Reno always thought it a little funny, though it made him uncomfortable at times. This time it was intentional though, and therefore amusing.

"Reno. I'm a SOLDIER cadet." Reno held out his hand awkwardly, and Tuesti immediately lit up and took it gingerly. Compared to Reno's big, lean fingers, Tuesti's were smaller and far softer. He'd probably never held a weapon in his life.

"Reno. Reeve Tuesti. I work here in Housing and Urban Development." Reno noticed he didn't admit to being the top of that food chain. "I was wondering if you would tell me more about under the plate. I go rarely, no time you see, and well, it's not quite the same as someone's who lived there and 'seen it all' if you will."

The poor man was babbling a bit. Reno almost felt bad for weaning information out of him, but certainly not enough to stop. "It's real dark and smoky and there's plenty of trash. Some people burn it to keep warm when it gets cold."

"How much trash is there would you say?"

"Well, I guess Mr. Tuesti, sir, there's enough to go 'round. People make houses outta it in the poorest parts, and even then it's all on the streets and sh- er, stuff."

Reno was starting to sound like some of those people who lived in the real dumps. He'd put on the accent real thick and tried to ham it up—though he hoped he didn't go too far. It didn't hurt to add a sir here or there too he knew. He'd probably give Dan a heart attack if the kid heard him.

"Reeve, just call me Reeve. I wonder if burning that trash could make energy. I know mako provides for all but there's been some…issues with it."

Reno perked up at Reeve's pause. Issues huh? "Um, issues? Like there's no power down below sometimes?"

"Well, not quite."

They continued Reno's walk and together had headed up to the roof as Reeve dodged some questions, but mostly encouraged Reno to chatter about the slums some more. Reno had been so engrossed in making this believable and winning the executive over, that he hadn't quite realized how far up they'd gotten. Reeve pushed open the door and they walked on to the roof, Reno making sure to look up at the night sky admiringly.

"Beautiful, isn't it?"

"Yeah." Reno's neck was craned at an awkward angle and the number of stars in the sky was actually fewer than he imagined. Somehow that swath of black dotted with millions of lights he'd seen in books had become black with a couple of pinpricks. "Where'd all the stars go?"

"All the lights and the smog cover them up. Their light isn't as strong, so it can't reach us here. If you were to go out into the desert you'd be able to see far more of them." Reeve was staring up too, lost in thought. "I hope one day everyone in Midgar will be able to see them."

"Yeah…" Reno felt pretty stupid for a moment, even if it did help his 'mission'.

"If you're coming up again, time it around now. I'll join you and you can tell me more about what happens under the plate. And maybe I'll be able to answer your questions." Reeve turned fully to look at Reno, who stopped staring at the handful of stars to stare at him. "This will be mutually beneficial, Reno. It was lovely meeting you. I hope to see you again soon." Reeve gave him a quick bow and showed himself off the roof.

Reno stared after him in contemplation.

_Guess he wasn't just for publicity. Sneaky bastard._

* * *

Cloud's return to the bunker was interrupted by his stomach. He hadn't eaten too much at dinner and now it complained.

Decision made, he changed direction and headed for a lounge where there were some snack machines and a couple of worn, yellow couches. Cadets hung out here sometimes and Cloud had caught some SOLDIERs once, but mostly it was for office workers and tonight the place was empty. Most everyone had gone into town since it was Friday night, and that left Cloud and the stragglers alone.

Oh, and Reno.

Cloud's frustration with Reno only grew as he thought about it. That boy had no idea what he was dabbling in, and Scarlet and Heidegger were dangerous territory. Even after Meteor, information about everything they'd done had been hard to come by, and Cloud was convinced they were the only ones alive who knew it all. But Reno wouldn't stop. He'd probably hound Cloud for a while then maybe resort to blackmail or coercion. Cloud didn't want to expect that of his growing friend, but he knew better than to underestimate Reno. The blond could hope there hadn't been too much of the Turk in Reno to begin with.

The lounge was deserted and the candy machine was still fairly full, so Cloud perused the selection in the lone light of the machine. The room was dark, just a scattering of lumpy couches and coffee tables. There were a handful of windows, but the night was full now and there was only a sliver of moon.

Speaking out loud to himself, Cloud wondered, "Chocolate… but which kind?"

Chocolate had been Cloud's vice growing up, and Tifa had taken every advantage she could to remind Cloud of it during their journey in AVALANCHE. He still couldn't forget the look on Barret's face when Tifa happily informed him Cloud's one and only weakness was chocolate—especially rich dark chocolate.

There were at least three different options and none were dark chocolate. However, Cloud didn't really want to get back to the barracks anytime soon, so he was procrastinating the decision, not to mention he couldn't quite remember what was in some of these candy bars. "Kit Kat…too easy to share, Dan'll want some…"

"Snickers are my favorite."

Cloud whirled around fast enough to cause whiplash, one fist lashing out instinctively. He hadn't heard or felt anyone come up behind him.

His fist was caught in a slender hand, the pale fingers curling over his knuckles. He really did have pianist's hands, long and supple, but their grip was tight and unyielding. Cloud couldn't help but lock his eyes on the difference in skin tone between them, one milky white the other with a pinkish flush. He tore his eyes away though as he realized what he was doing.

He was tall enough that Cloud had to look up, otherwise his eyes rested on the slip of skin peeking out where his shirt was unbuttoned. Cloud thought he could feel his heart stutter beneath his ribs, but it was like everything had frozen and it didn't matter.

He couldn't tell what Sephiroth was thinking, but it was probably something bad.

His stoic face was still hard, but somehow softer than it had been in the office. The lines weren't nearly so stressed or solemn, and his eyes had lost that imperial touch. Maybe it was because this wasn't a formal meeting, or it was the lighting, or maybe because Cloud had tried to punch him, but either way it was restarting Cloud's heart and making it flutter oddly.

Cloud loosened his fisted hand after a moment, realizing Sephiroth hadn't let go. He vehemently squashed the giddiness at that as Sephiroth's fingers slipped off his hand. _This doesn't count as anything. This_ doesn't _count as anything._

"Snickers are my favorite, Strife."

The hairs on the back of Cloud's neck rose at how mellow and smooth Sephiroth's voice was. Cloud's ears were as red as Reno's hair and the blush was spreading wildly. He could feel it crawling on his skin. It took him a moment to register the words, and then he looked away from those captivating eyes and let out an unsteady breath, nodding vacantly to the General's shoulder before turning to the machine.

Carefully, trying to keep his hands from shaking, he took the small handful of gil in his pocket and popped three in for the candy, doing it slowly so he didn't drop them and make more of a fool of himself. He pressed the buttons, acutely aware of Sephiroth's presence no more than two feet behind him.

His back was so rigid he thought it might snap, and every time Sephiroth exhaled it managed to tense just a little bit more. Cloud couldn't believe he hadn't realized anyone was standing there before, because now all his attention was fixating on the man behind him, relentlessly outlining every swish of his hair or twitch of his fingers.

He tried to focus as he waited what felt like an hour for the machine to register the money, his choice, and then laboriously push the candy out of the rack. The grind of the machine was grating to Cloud's ears, and he immediately wondered if it bothered Sephiroth even more. He had the ridiculous urge to apologize for it, but the words wouldn't come out, and Cloud knew he'd regret them if they did. Cloud tried to focus on Reno, his mind going high speed, trying to think of all the reasons the redhead was getting to him. He could use that frustration instead of this tumult of feelings he couldn't control.

It was beginning to work slowly, as he thought of how stupid he must look, being so nervous waiting for candy of all things. The General would never take him seriously like that, and it would disappoint Zack, but most of all Reno would never stop laughing. And then Cloud would be even more of a fool, and the General would see it and…

The Snickers was stuck. The corner of the wrapper was caught in the ring of its row and Cloud couldn't believe his idiotic luck. This day had started off well and just kept going downhill as far as Cloud was concerned. First Reno, now Sephiroth, and this. As though he hadn't been toyed with by fate enough.

Before he could think it through, he slammed his fist against the transparent plastic of the machine, even letting a growl of annoyance slip out. Sephiroth's presence was screwing with him, Reno's antics were stressing him out, and now he just wanted some chocolate to fill the gnawing feeling in his stomach, but the damn thing couldn't even do that.

"Hm…bad day?"

Cloud twitched at Sephiroth's infinitely smooth voice slipped into the haze of his mind. He relaxed his shoulders carefully, suddenly aware of what he'd done. He'd practically thrown a temper tantrum in front of the General. _The General! Sephiroth!_

He closed his eyes, resting his fist against the machine but loosening the strength in his fingers. He felt like a child and an idiot. "Ah, sorry sir. I just… things have been… well, what I mean is-"

"It's fine Strife. Here." Cloud turned back around slowly. In Sephiroth's hand was three more gil. Cloud's eyes went as wide as they could.

"No, no thank you sir. I couldn't, c-couldn't possibly-"

Sephiroth sighed and shook his hand before him. "I have plenty and I know cadets make little. I think I can spare three."

Cloud stared at Sephiroth, more surprised than anything else now. He could swear Sephiroth might be, well, unsure about this. His face was clear of any thought or emotion at all, but the way he'd slipped his hair behind his ear right before speaking had Cloud wondering.

Cloud reached out meaning to just say no, but his hand pushed the ends of Sephiroth's fingers and curled them back over the money before he quite realized it. "It's fine sir. I don't really need it."

He wanted to crack a joke about his teeth or fat, but his throat already had his heart in it and the words were all garbled in his head. _Why did I touch him?_ He didn't really need the chocolate, and most of all he just wanted to get out of the stifling atmosphere before something even worse happened.

Sephiroth looked surprised for barely a moment, his eyes darting down to where their hands had so briefly touched. "Then wait a moment Strife."

With some reluctance, Cloud stepped aside. All he wanted to do was collapse on his bunk and hopefully wake up with amnesia.

The machine beeped as Sephiroth put his money and choice in, then two thumps of falling candy followed. Sephiroth crouched down to get them out and Cloud's gaze flicked away from the tempting sight in work pants. Sephiroth righted in a moment, too graceful to be real, and held out a Snickers bar.

When he reached out to take it, Sephiroth dropped the candy in his hand and folded his own fingers over it before walking away with a murmured, "Good night, Strife."

Cloud closed his fingers on the bar, knowing for a second if he'd been his younger self he would never have been able to eat the chocolate. The General walked out of the room without a second glance, already peeling away the wrapper of his own Snickers.

* * *

"I've got an idea Cloud, so will you at least listen?"

Reno and Cloud were walking through the hallway on their way out to Midgar. Reno had offered the parkour lesson if Cloud at least listened to his idea on how to get information on Heidegger and Scarlet. Cloud had agreed, knowing whatever Reno came up with he'd turn down.

"Don't get that look Cloud. I know you're gonna say 'no' no matter what, but you have to hear it. Who else am I gonna ask?"

Cloud sighed and looked away, glancing down a connecting hall. Reno turned to continue his argument and caught the most irresistible red blush coloring the blond's ears.

The General was heading down the corridor, an aide by his side and a clipboard in his hand. He was dressed perfectly normally with the sleeves rolled up even with all the air-conditioning, being all General-ly as usual, and Reno wasn't all that impressed. He was far scarier in that leather outfit, not that Reno was going around challenging him to fights. But Cloud had practically stopped walking, and though Sephiroth wasn't looking at them he knew he would be in a second.

As tempting as it was to see what would happen if Cloud were caught staring, Reno knew a good plight when he needed one. Cloud was going to grow roots and stick to that floor until Sephiroth walked into him or looked at him, in which case Cloud looked like he might faint.

_Well, sometimes it pays off to be the knight._

Reno yanked Cloud's arm a little harder than necessary, walking the blond around a corner before he could be caught. Cloud would thank him later, and Reno might already have half of the key to Cloud already without even trying.


	15. Many Paths and Errands

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There's parkour, doodling, drinks, and a long, hot shower.

His face was red, there were pebbles on his hands, soot in his fingernails and dirt in his mouth, and Cloud had managed to forget everything but it for once—it was wonderful.

Parkour was a gritty sport at its best, its roots coming from city dwellers running from police and gangs. Cloud had thought of it first only in terms of usefulness, thinking only of how that sort of agility and awareness of the environment could be applied in fighting and future events. Even now that was his overarching goal, but it didn't mean he couldn't enjoy it.

There was something about being slammed into the ground during a practice spar that made Cloud just want to get up and do it again. It might have been that bit of masochist in him, but he liked a rough opponent who wasn't afraid to turn a push into a shove. It wasn't fun and rewarding if there weren't bruises and dirt in the end, and parkour was certainly left him a dirty and sweaty mess. Reno must have felt the same way, because his grin was saying it all.

They were on a set of steps leading down from a dark building in an abandoned part of the slums. There were quite a few of them, mostly because they were Shinra property and had been testing ground sites for weaponry. The Shinra labs had a couple of spots here for mutant testing, and that cleared out this area real fast. Cans and newspapers drifted about in the dirty wind that swept this way east, neither refreshing nor particularly cool. The dark, hulking shapes of buildings threw them into deeper shadow and even though it was mid-afternoon, evening was taking shape here.

Reno had called it safe. Reno's idea of safe, however, left much to be desired. Cloud had slipped an extra weapon with him just in case.

The building before them sat on a raised dais with a large front courtyard that might once have been something great. The mortar was cracked, the stone fountain chipped and long run dry. It was wholly unimpressive now except for the massive staircase Cloud and Reno were at the bottom of.

The steps they were on were directly under Cloud's nose, his breath swirling up dust with every exhale. He could have relaxed his arms and laid his cheek on the ground, but then his legs might have given way if he let himself. That, and one of Reno's buttons were staring up at him. Reno lost more buttons than Cloud could imagine. Their feet were up against the wall, above their backs in a handstand position, forcing all of their weight on to the palms of their hands. It was a distinctly uncomfortable pose, and Cloud had a feeling he'd have burns on the bottom of his palms before this was over. He needed to get some decent gloves soon.

A dank, sweaty wind rustled by them and out of the corner of Cloud's eye he could see a couple of empty liquor bottles rolling away with it. A newspaper, musty and yellow and probably teeming with germs, hit one of his upraised legs. Cloud let go of the disgust and shook his left leg a couple of times before he managed to get the old newspaper off it.

His hands were positioned on two different levels of steps, one higher than the other, and the exertion of holding up his entire body weight for a prolonged period of time shook his shoulder blades and biceps with the stress. Reno was a couple of steps down from Cloud in the same position. He was sweating and trembling even more so, but equally determined. The point of the exercise was to move up and down the stairs on their hands, while their feet guided them against the wall. It was an excellent workout for their arms, though not related in particular to parkour. Cloud didn't mind any extra training; he wasn't overly fond of weight lifting, so the novelty of this method of muscle building was exciting.

"I'm… switching over." Reno's voice was difficult to understand, his vocal cords being constricted from the position. His face matched his hair from all the blood rushing down into it, and Cloud was sure he looked just as good right now.

Reno's hands disappeared from Cloud's view, and Cloud felt a wind go by as the redhead kicked his legs up. In that handstand, his legs bending at the knees to maintain balance, Reno hobbled his way to the other side of the stairs. It was a more impressive feat once Cloud had tried it and discovered how much effort it took to maintain. As soon as Reno's feet hit the wall he let out a loud sigh. Cloud knew exactly how he felt. They'd done this enough times to recognize the momentary relief when the burn ebbed from their arms for a couple seconds. It was back in just moments though, especially when climbing back up.

Cloud watched for a moment, lifting his head to keep his eyes on Reno as he moved. He could feel the sweat sliding down his cheeks and out of his hair, but ignored the persistent urge to wipe it away. He'd only get more grit on his face since his hands had been pressed against the ground for some time now. Cloud shuffled down to the bottom of the staircase and then lifted his body back into the air, resting everything on his hands. He'd fallen more times than he could count doing this, but around the fifth time he'd gotten the handstand down pact. He came as far from the other wall as he dared before letting his feet slide down until they touched it. The relief was only there for a moment.

Now he had to go up.

As backbreaking as the exercises were, Reno always tried to make it a race or competition to keep their spirits up. Cloud had never really had to work at being strong before—by the time he'd joined up with AVALANCHE he'd been mako enhanced beyond most First Class SOLDIERs, and he got stronger just fighting all the beasts that AVALANCHE kept running into. That wasn't how it worked here though, so Cloud did his best to adapt, and if he got to beat Reno occasionally at a race, then the victory was that much sweeter.

* * *

It was a little known fact that Reeve Tuesti was a doodler.

He had a finely colored, fake wood desk covered with penned doodles he'd done over the years. Most useful for when someone actually visited his office and he was bored to tears with their talk. He'd drawn his own knot into the wood and the drawing had become so complicated he got dizzy from looking at it for too long.

There were packets and folders strewn around the cramped room, some drawn on with little cartoonish faces and others with just complicated lines curving all over. His desk was backed into the corner with a side angle of the lone window on one wall. He had a plant off in the corner, its ferns and sprigs reaching longingly out towards the window. Whether for genuine sunlight or death Reeve hadn't dared to imagine.

He hated this office. It was crowded with the filing work and papers he was continually dumped with, the cheap, metal cabinets on the walls were already full to the brim. Without a proper assistant or a real department most of the work fell on him. Even as the Head of Urban Development, he had little funds and even less help.

Shinra had never really appreciated the environmental side of science or his input at conference meetings. It had gotten to the point that he had just stopped trying. It had been maddening at first, and he was still embarrassed that after his third meeting as head he'd thrown his paperweight at the wall out of anger.

By now he was just tired of the same old routine. He'd had a position on the board for over seven years and been at Shinra even longer without seeing any kind of real change. The only departments that had changed were the other science associated ones: Scientific Research, Weapons Research, and of course SOLDIER.

The only reason Reeve thought he had even become Head of Urban Development was because they'd never heard a peep out of him when he was a part of the Environmental Science department. He'd been a regular worker for six years when he'd gotten the sudden promotion at the same time they dissolved his department and turned it into "Urban Development". And to think, he thought he'd earned it at the time.

Well, change wouldn't come from the inside, Reeve had found out. His position didn't equate with power, and he found the corruption started from the core. To make changes it meant working from the outside in or the bottom up, and he'd already started.

* * *

Maintaining his still stance, Cloud could feel the minor spasms in his stomach and the sweat drops were sliding off the sides as the humid heat hung unrelenting around them. His toes were starting to hurt from being clenched so tight and the idea of a foot cramp was steadily growing on his mind. His hands trembled from where they were locked behind his lower back, his knuckles aching as he unconsciously tugged on his fingers to help keep his balance.

Reno was far worse off than he was, and had resorted to pushups since he couldn't keep up the punishing position. Cloud would have laughed at the angry look on the other's face when he stopped, but his abdominal muscles probably would have given out. The blond's morning routine seemed shabby compared to what Reno had them doing. It had him vowing to make a more rigorous workout to match, that is, if he could ever stand again.

It was a strenuous version of sit-ups that Reno had him doing. His feet were locked under the hoop of the first rib of a bike rack, while he sat on the second. This was proving to become vastly uncomfortable over time, but Cloud told himself the pain was the exchange for the workout. From this locked position, he used his stomach muscles to raise and lower his upper body, almost touching the back of his neck to the next rib. If he didn't come out of this with abs of steel he was going to be sorely irritated.

When Reno had said strength exercises, Cloud had thought of the usual pull-ups, jumping and running, maybe even lifting weights if they could get some proper ones from the SOLDIER's closet in the gym. But the way Reno used the environment even in this 'safe' area spoke a lot about his knowledge of the slums and his ability to improvise—or steal good techniques from others.

Reno was down the rack from him, his hands on one hoop and his feet on another doing pushups that Cloud couldn't see, but could hear in the other's ragged breathing.

"You know… I tried to do this st-steadily for years." Reno's voice was choppy at best, his harsh panting and how he was actually speaking towards the ground with his pushups made it difficult to understand him.

"Why… didn't you?" Cloud's abs immediately protested at the extra breath it took to speak the words. He ignored the spasm and kept up his rhythm.

"Couldn't get the… motivation to do it. Didn't need it… as much. But now… we got all kinds of… competition." Reno was practically wheezing, and Cloud didn't know why for the life of him Reno was talking about this up now. He couldn't think of anything good to say in response either. Reno was waiting for something, some kind of affirmative or even a straight negative, but Cloud wasn't sure what the question was.

"Hey… Cloud." Cloud grunted to let him know he'd heard. "SOLDIER… works in teams, right?"

Oh.

The "we" should have been the cue but Cloud hadn't really been paying that much attention. He leaned back on his last sit-up, resting his head on the last bar, Reno just one over from him. Cloud's view was of Reno bobbing up and down in front of him, moving seemingly upside down, his face sweaty and red with exertion. He had the uncomfortable feeling of a sweat drop weaving its way through his hair then moving down his shirt.

"Yeah, platoons," Cloud was able to say. On the next set he was able to look down at Reno just long enough to catch his eye before both went back to counting.

* * *

These reports would never be done. By the time Reeve even got halfway through the left pile, more had grown from secretaries and messengers on the pile to the right. Somewhere not so deep in him he damned himself and his anal thoroughness that didn't let him skim these and sign. He could hardly get his eyes to focus on all the fine print, which was the most important part since this was Shinra. The moment "the" started to look like every word on the line and every line was exactly the same as the one before, he knew he needed a break. A cup of coffee was in order.

Reeve pushed back his seat from his chair and winced as the back connected with the wall. There was a lovely dark line there from the years of abuse and a cheap paint job. He slipped out from behind his desk and made his way to the door. Filing cabinets lined every wall, and Reeve ignored the multiple boxes sitting on the floor next to them, some of which he had to step over just to get out. They were all filled with rejected plans and copies upon copies of mindless paperwork.

The hallway outside was clear; Reeve didn't think he had ever run into anyone from his own department here. In fact, he didn't think he even knew what they looked like—he'd only seen their names on top of documents to sign. There were three other offices on this floor and three janitorial closets. Six rooms, and only three actually belonged to his department. He was king of this hallway and just about that. He couldn't even sell the strangely olive-colored carpet to fund anything, not with so many cigarette burns and odd coffee stains—at least he hoped they were coffee stains.

The only coffee machine near him was four stories down. It actually belonged to some of the Weapons Department managers, but he was a Shinra employee. If they were allowed to abuse their position, he was morally free to liberate some coffee from their tyrannical hands. They were the ones who had jacked up their salaries and were allotted things like espresso-making coffee machines. Reeve didn't think anyone on that floor, or any of the surrounding floors, had ever used that feature, but it was there.

That really irked him more than their abuse of power. Waste of space and money. He'd even forced himself to get an espresso on more than one occasion to see if he felt better justifying why they bought it. It didn't.

The stairs were even quieter than the hallway and his shoes were loud as they echoed. Many employees didn't even know Shinra had stairs. Reeve wanted to be annoyed at them for their ignorance, but knew feelings like those would get him nowhere. He hadn't gotten anywhere for years on his sense of justice, but the only man who did and lived was probably the General. The rest of Shinra had to abide and work within their limits, and Reeve knew his grew closer with every meeting.

He came out at the end of the hallway, the coffee machine just around the corner of the next room. The carpet here was plushier than his own, but a rather revolting shade of maroon. Reeve was almost glad his wasn't like this. No one would have bought this one either.

He turned the corner to the coffee machine, snagged a Styrofoam cup and filled it to the brim. It didn't matter how cheap and tasteless the stuff was, there was more caffeine than anything else in it and that was all Reeve needed. He turned to leave but was surprised when he realized he wasn't alone.

_They say thinking of the Devil draws him near._

* * *

"Alright, let's get to Wall Market. We'll do some stuff there, there's a great spot in the back." Cloud brushed his hands down on his pants, but they still smelled of metal and dirt, and they prickled from how tightly he'd been holding the bars.

The redhead was standing on a ledge not far from Cloud's own, one foot dangling off the side and one foot on it. Cloud had copied the motion and both boys had been balancing on one foot while raising and lowering their bodies, switching every twenty times to keep the muscles warm. He felt like a ninja out of one of Denzel's comic books. Except they didn't flail wildly when they lost balance—too much pride.

"Sure." Cloud with the usual passive aplomb. He hopped down and eyed Reno's grin from where he was still standing, now on both feet. "Extreme tag?"

Reno didn't even wait for an answer; he took off.

* * *

The General of Shinra wasn't one for coffee, Reeve had thought, since he'd only seen the man drink tea. But then, who was he to say considering he really only saw him at meetings.

"Greetings General." Reeve raised his cup to Sephiroth, internally wincing at what he'd just said. Reeve liked to think he was a man who thought before he spoke, but the General always made him jittery, and the caffeine wasn't helping. At least Scarlet got tongue-twisted in the man's presence too, and that was a sight to see.

Sephiroth nodded his head in response, hardly phased by Reeve's words. He probably intimidated everyone into incoherency.

His outfit today was a little stricter than normal, Reeve noticed. They passed often enough, but rarely exchanged words. Still, today Sephiroth's outfit spoke more of physical work than office and Reeve envied his ability to do that. Urban Development didn't often have an excuse to leave the building and burn off some energy, not even to ostensibly check on repairs to the plate. Reeve was a rubber-stamp manager, not an engineer.

Under Sephiroth's white-collar shirt were two criss-crossing straps of leather, the harness for Masamune though where the sword was Reeve didn't know. He was just glad it wasn't here. An unarmed Sephiroth was frightening enough. He had on some tight leather pants and military boots to match with it. He'd been training because his hair was in slight disarray, but other than the outfit he didn't look sweaty or particularly tired.

Still, Sephiroth managed to look like an S&M model that'd just stepped out of a dungeon, making Reeve feel like a potbelly drunk on the street. The second that thought flashed through this mind he clamped down on it though, aware of his company. Reeve didn't really think Sephiroth could read minds, but he could be eerily accurate and there was no harm in being careful.

The General took a sip of his coffee, staring out the window absentmindedly, either not noticing or politely ignoring Reeve's scrutiny. The Head of Urban Development had never seen Sephiroth looking so relaxed, if that was even the right word for it. He was still guarded, but there wasn't the tinge of irritation that he normally saw or the blank stoicism. It made him more… arresting than usual.

"Tuesti, I've heard about beams cracking on the underside of the plate." Reeve looked up at the taller man; surprised at both the comment and that he was speaking to Reeve at all. He didn't turn away, but he inclined his head slightly in Reeve's direction. If this weren't the General, Reeve might have taken it as a snub. Sephiroth was not an unkind man, but as was well known he could be very cold. Reeve knew the President and his lackeys—just about everyone on the board—pissed the General off, so what few conversations they had had been in the wake of those emotions. Though Sephiroth never looked it, even he was susceptible to emotional moods.

What Reeve knew about him was more from the unspoken side, or from his SOLDIERs. As an executive Reeve did attend many of the major functions of the various departments, including major scientific and weaponry unveilings, major SOLDIER promotions, and other company matters. Reeve had seen firsthand at many events involving SOLDIERS how Sephiroth's men deferred to their leader. They respected his authority and aspired to fight by him, and among the tightly knit group of Firsts he was often referred to and treated like kin: godly and untouchable, but still kin. Sephiroth's leadership ability was evident in their unrestrained loyalty. A part of Reeve envied it, but he was more impressed than anything else. This was the kind of power fat, old Shinra could never wield, and it made the General practically sacrosanct.

"Tuesti?" There was a flatness in Sephiroth's expression Reeve hadn't seen directed at him before. He had an inkling it was the onset of annoyance in the General and hurried to respond.

"Erm… yes. Parts under the plate are weakening, but structural work is already beginning. Just some old beams." He hadn't realized it, but he was starting to feel warm and his words were spoken quickly. Sephiroth had the tendency to make people nervous, afraid to disappoint or anger him. Whether that was out of fear of the consequences or whether he was the kind of man people inherently liked to please, Reeve wasn't sure. Still, as he watched Sephiroth nod and turn away, his steaming cup in hand, he was inclined to think it was the latter.

* * *

Cloud put on a burst of speed as he rounded the next corner. The walled in area near the backdoor of the building wasn't too high for a jump. Two feet from the wall he launched himself up, catching hold of the top with his hands and using the balls of his feet to pull himself up. Reno was just steps ahead of him, running along the top of the wall.

While not as graceful as the redhead, Cloud was up in a flash and following. Reno jumped down, rolling as he landed, and bounced right back up to his feet to take off again. Cloud followed suit, trailing after Reno even as he half-sprinted. Endurance was just as important as speed here.

A slanted walkway for the disabled was dead ahead and Reno had already thrown himself over the railing, running along the second tier of the ramp. Seeing him going for a turn, Cloud grabbed the rail with one hand and launched himself over, then using the same momentum, slipped under the railing of a higher ledge just steps away, so he was running parallel to Reno on the ground.

They weren't even for long when Reno jumped for the top of a dumpster, clambering on to the top just as Cloud got to the bottom. Cloud had just jumped up to grab Reno's ankle with his hand when the redhead back flipped off the top, landing with a hard thump on the ground. Cloud turned fast, but not quick enough to stop the eager redhead.

The entrance to the train graveyard appeared, and Cloud and Reno ran right through, dodging small monsters and kicking up dust in their wake. Reno hopped up a couple of crates and on to a train car. Cloud cut through a split open train, making sure to keep pace. Reno jumped the spaces between cars as Cloud deviated away and around, using the extra space to increase his speed. With a push, Cloud managed to jump from the ground to the top of a train car, scrabbling with his feet to pull himself up. Reno skipped just out of reach in time.

They ran all the way through the train yard and out into a side road of Wall Market. Reno cleared a park bench in one leap, followed by Cloud close on his heels. Both boys skidded corners and jumped down steps, using handrails and low ledges for an extra boost of speed. Reno was laughing as he ran, though it was less boisterous than usual from lack of air. Cloud might have to teach Reno the circular breathing technique if they did a lot more running like this.

Cloud leapt up for a high wall, and as he jumped from roof to roof he felt younger than ever. This was the closest he was going to get to anti-gravity fighting for a long time yet, so Cloud relished the weightlessness and for the duration of the game forgot about everything else.

* * *

_Dear Cloud,_

_Happy Birthday! 17 is a big year! Congratulations! I know this will probably be a bit late, but the wolves came down closer than they have in some years and with the blizzard the mail carrier was delayed._ _You'd better be as careful in the desert as you are in the mountains. Even SOLDIERs aren't invincible._

_I hope you have a wonderful birthday. Spend some of this money on a nice dinner with some friends. You've written often enough about the food so I hope you do something special for it._

_I miss you dearly. The house is never the same with just me in it. If you get leave come visit. I've missed you so much in these months. Your letters always make me happy; so I hope this chocolate cake recipe you love will do the same. Surely they've got a kitchen you can use! Be safe and know that I'm proud of you no matter what._

_Love,_

_Mom_

* * *

"If you're not going to finish that I will." Reno's fork was pointing at the last of Cloud's burger. Cloud shrugged, and Reno decided that was enough for a yes and pulled the plate closer to him.

While normally Cloud would never have given up halfway decent food instead of Shinra's terrible grub, his appetite had whittled away. The back corner of Wall Market Reno had been talking about was in fact a place he remembered from AVALANCHE. They'd climbed up to the plate to infiltrate Shinra from this very spot. It was a dead end covered in graffiti past Don Corneo's mansion—Cloud and Reno had both moved a little quicker when they came within sight of that house. Cloud didn't know why Reno wanted to get out of there so fast, but the blond had distinct memories of his one and only cross-dressing experience, and the Don wasn't someone he wanted to see.

Looking up from where they sat on the dusty ground, Cloud could see the beams and chains they'd use to get up to the plate. That climb had been completely terrifying—not even he would have survived a fall from some of those heights. Cloud remembered how he'd swallowed the fear of being so high up because he was the leader and couldn't show it. It didn't matter how scared he'd been when Tifa slipped and he'd looked down at her to assure her and accidentally taken a heart-stopping look at the ground hundreds of dizzying feet away. The days with AVALANCHE had been wild and wonderful and sad and thrilling.

Nostalgia. He always thought it was funny that in a way he missed chasing Sephiroth, getting stabbed, getting robbed, finding out all the dirty secrets he didn't really want to know. He never thought he would miss things he hated, like going without baths for weeks, practically falling out of airships, stealing what he couldn't afford. But really, what he missed was the camaraderie, the sense of purpose, all things that had withered away after Meteor. Even after dealing with Kadaj and his group, all the good feelings were gone soon enough.

Reno was still cleaning through his lunch, but he'd also gotten up to inspect the dangling chains and graffiti on the nearby walls. Cloud, who had unwittingly brought his own mood down, reaching into his pocket for the letter he'd received that morning. It was a rare thing to get mail, and a rarer thing still that the nostalgia that normally hit him included his mother.

"What's that?" Cloud immediately tucked it away again, but knowing discouraging Reno directly would only egg the redhead on.

"A letter."

Reno snorted. "Duh." He took another bite though, and after eyeing Cloud's pocket he let him keep his secrets. The redhead wandered over and started to write over some gang's graffiti on the wall.

Cloud tentatively touched the pocket where the letter was. His mother was just as he remembered: optimistic, motherly, and warm. She still managed to inspire in him some of the kind of childhood feelings that were untainted—dreams of being great, respected, redeemed. While dimmed in memory, what sunk into Cloud more was that he held the truth in his hands of her life, proof she still breathed. She'd almost been a dream to him at times, she'd been so forgotten.

He had gone so very long without a mother, lost so many memories of the heroic woman of his childhood, that having her now made his chest tighten painfully. His closed his eyes briefly, trying to recall her as best as he could.

Her image was unclear to him, her face just a pale shape with blond hair and a soft, rounded body that he only vaguely remembered embracing as a child. Her voice he couldn't remember, though he knew she carried the scent of cooking with her, or sometimes the earth outside from her garden.

He pulled out the second sheet of the letter, the recipe written in her fine, small handwriting. Just looking at the ingredients of the cake reminded him of when he'd been too short to see the top of the counter, how he'd stood on the bathroom stool and helped stir. How the smell wafted all the way up to his room when it finished cooking, and the way he'd practically trip down the stairs as he ran down so fast when the oven's timer went off.

It had been more than a life ago for him. Planet, he even remembered how smeared the words "Happy Birthday" had been when he'd written them himself on his sixth birthday cake. He'd be a better son to his mother. He'd protect her as she had when he was a child.

"Cloud?"

Cloud jerked a bit, forgetting Reno had even been there. His dusty fingerprints were glued to the letter and he tried to rub them off before giving up. He didn't have any water to wash his hands with, and he'd finished off his drinking water since Reno had insisted on getting the hottest chili fries he knew of. Cloud folded both sheets back up then pocketed them before standing up and stretching a bit.

"One more run to the train station?"

Cloud shook out the stiff muscles and eyed the entrance to the dead end. He was closer; he could beat Reno to it if he sprinted. "Sure. Tag, you're it."

* * *

Reeve had returned to his office and didn't realize he'd left his coffee on the table downstairs until he sat back behind his desk. Damn the General. As amazing as the man was, he managed to bring out some of the worst traits in Reeve.

As soon as Reeve surveyed the damage in his office he seriously considered going back down to get his cup. More paperwork had made it into his room in his five-minute absence. He squashed the surge of irritation, and pulled the nearest files to him.

* * *

"I always thought Rude was strange." Cloud's slur was terrible, but Reno didn't seem to have a problem understanding him. When Reno and Cloud got to the train station and realized it was going to be an hour-long wait for the next one up to HQ, Reno had insisted on a drink. Cloud hadn't known he had such low alcohol tolerance until right about now.

"Man, rude is the way of the slums. Ya should know that by now," Reno said companionably, considerably less drunk than Cloud but he was certainly feeling the alcohol.

The bar was low-lit and smoky, music drifting out from hidden speakers and raucous voices rising and lowering in turn. There were some people dancing a ways away, but neither cadet felt much of an inclination to join them. Cloud seemed content to brood, and Reno just wanted more booze.

The Goblin's Bar was a busy place on Saturday night and they were not the only Shinra people there. No other cadets were there, and no one recognized them without their uniforms, but a couple of army regulars were drinking too. Reno had both elbows resting on the bar top, turned to face the room while leaning back on the counter. His face had the cheeky grin of a cocky drunk. Cloud was slumped next to him, his glass held tightly in his hand as he spoke softly to himself, or perhaps speaking to Reno. The redhead wasn't getting much of what he said. He was getting more disappointed Cloud wasn't a wild drunk by the minute. Turned out the blond was a real mope, mumbling about all sorts of random places and people.

"Y'know, I had some of these drinks once – "

"Did you get as piss-ass drunk as you are now?"

Cloud ignored what a curser Reno was when drunk. Cid cursed worse even when he was sober. "And Cid was just – "

"Cid? I am sittin'."

Cloud tried to shake his head in the negative to correct Reno's mistake, but his head started to swim funnily and the bar was beginning to tilt. Maybe they were having an earthquake. Tifa would be really mad if the glasses fell and broke.

"Marlene never liked to sit for long." What was the story he was going to tell?

"I like wild girls too Cloud. Yo, pass that over." Reno snickered as Cloud hazily pushed the glass in his direction. He didn't seem to care the redhead was cutting him off or that Reno had just downed the rest of his drink.

Cloud frowned. He couldn't remember what he wanted to say.

"Turks are bad. They've got no rules. Y'should… watch out."

"I know. Mad crazy ninjas." Reno jumped up and struck a terrible pose, one knee raised in the air, both arms up with his hands hooked. He looked like he was going to make a noise, but he fell off balance first and stumbled into Cloud. The blond socked him in the stomach before he could even balance himself and they both toppled to the floor.

"Man Cloud, go find some whore to sleep with and relax a little. There's a hot barmaid over there." Reno tried to shove him off and point at the same time but didn't realize he was pushing Cloud into the bar. The blond didn't seem to notice though. He was frowning at Reno now, his eyes unfocused from all their drinks.

"Tifa's not a whore."

"Just g'off."

Cloud fell to the side and Reno managed to sit up and reclaim his chair. Cloud warned him to watch Tsurugi before staggering off to the bathroom.

Reno turned to his own half-empty drink glass and picked it up. "Bottoms up to Tsurugi." He drained it in one gulp.

* * *

Cadet bathrooms were communal showers, toilets, and saunas, though the last part hadn't been intentional. The air never really circulated in here, and Cloud tried not to dwell on that. The fact that he'd even made it here was a miracle, especially when Reno passed out on him in the parking lot when they were sneaking back in. Carrying all that dead weight while his stomach was threatening to come back up had not been easy.

The hot water wouldn't last forever, but Cloud just couldn't make himself get out of the shower. He'd never been a fan of drinking, having seen too many people make utter fools out of themselves while under the influence. Cloud had never had much experience with getting drunk himself either—mako helped improve liver function significantly, and considering how much mako Cloud had been enhanced with, it had basically been impossible for him to get drunk for longer than a couple of minutes.

He knew the alcohol was still in his system now though, it was hard not to when the room still spun if he turned too fast, and that he'd wake up tomorrow with a blacksmith hammering in his head, but he wanted this shower now to get rid of the smell. He hoped the steam and heat would help rid the fogginess from his mind.

He stooped down to reach for the soap on the floor, backing up into the cold wall at the same time. The sudden cold on his backside made him jump forward shocked. For a second there it had felt like a hand. He groaned aloud as he realized the image in his head was stuck now, and even with all the drinks a part of him was very interested in this new direction. Cloud hadn't really had the time or the interest—cadets were mere _boys_ and he had a lot of other things on his mind—to think about his libido. He'd been, well, busy.

Considering how hard he was already, his body had been silently protesting his abstinence. He'd never been a fan of helping himself, since it generally compounded feelings of loneliness, but Cloud didn't exactly invite people to his bed either, and what was one more sense of isolation on top of all the others?

_Damn it._

He popped his head outside the shower stall, keeping his body as covered as possible as he took a quick scan around. There was no one else in the showers. He was alone, with hot water, sleeping boys a couple hallways away, and a hard on that refused to flag.

Cloud dropped the soap back on the floor and tried to let go of his worries for a second and just relax. The cadet showers weren't the place for a long, drawn-out fantasy—someone else might come in with the same idea—but release was release. And it was certainly more private at two in the morning then any other time. He reached up to tweak a nipple, the buds hardening as he tried to envision someone else doing it to him.

_Just, not him…_

Vincent. Yes, Vincent was a safe image. Vincent didn't have the associations of bad memories or taboo thoughts. He wasn't going to see him in the hallways or at the snack machines. Nor would he have to hear his name at every corner.

Cloud's hand drifted lower, brushing the fine hairs of his stomach down to the base of his shaft. He knew it tickled with another's hand, and his muscles twitched in response to that thought. Cloud tried not to think about how awkwardly childish he felt doing this, or how hundreds of boys had done this here before. He just wanted to focus on his hands, the way they drifted tantalizingly, teasingly along his skin, making him forget for a while more where he was.

It didn't work like that though. It never did. The alcohol wasn't helping as the fantasy got hotter, Cloud's hands groping and cupping and squeezing whatever they could reach. When he closed his eyes he could imagine smoldering ones staring down at him, desire blatant, framed by pale skin and high cheekbones. He couldn't make the eyes change to Vincent's red though, and eventually Cloud stopped trying as he pumped himself harder with his hand.

"Please," he whispered just barely then winced when he realized he'd spoken aloud. His voice was embarrassingly saturated with need, so he clamped his mouth shut and begged with his body as much as his mouth, the cage of his fist tightening just a little around his member.

The memory of the black velvet of his lover's baritone made his breath catch, as he tried to remember it as exactly as possible. He could practically feel the voice speaking against his neck, the rumble in his lean chest as he spoke the command. "Hush." Cloud tried to slow his breathing and quiet it, but he was getting so close, and each pass of his thumb along the sensitive edge of his cock was pushing his limits. This would be embarrassingly short. He'd lost all his control from the start, already given in before he'd even known it.

Cloud was backed up into the wall now, a finger probing at his deepest reach. He couldn't get deep enough, his imaginary lover toying with him. His hair would be like satin, Cloud imagined, and it, not water, would be all around him on all sides, sticking to his waist, his neck, his arms.

His fingers pinched a little too hard, like teeth biting into his nipple and the sudden pain elicited a deep, guttural moan from Cloud that he instantly silenced, remembering that low command. He was climbing and climbing a peak, almost imagining he could feel the body against him rippling with just as much need as his own. This was what he wanted, what he needed.

His free hand became trapped between the cold wall and his back as he pushed back. The sensation of being held down, no matter how fake, was so erotic he fought it, and in his own way asked for more. His imaginary lover did not disappoint. With every buck he was met with an iron wall of resistance, and it quickly became too much.

Cloud didn't cry out as he hit his peak, spots of white and silver in his vision, because the whispered name that escaped was far more damning. He could feel his member spasming as he milked himself for the last before he sagged against the wall. He wished suddenly for a phantom hand to steady him as he sat, but none was forthcoming. The imaginary lover was already gone, and as Cloud predicted, he felt lonelier than before.


	16. Caught in the Undertow

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cloud's bunker gets in trouble, and it's not pretty for anyone.

Tonight was a good night, Reno thought. He'd managed to get Cloud totally sloshed, and even though he'd been a boring drunk, after a couple of drinks even Cloud's mumbled and slurred stories had been hilarious. How they'd managed to get back to Shinra, Reno would have a good laugh later about. He knew Cloud probably wouldn't remember, but Reno would cherish knowing Cloud could cuss like a pirate. When Reno had gone and "passed out" in the parking lot, Cloud had quite a few choice words and colorful phrases to say about it. Reno knew he tended to curse when he was drunk, but Cloud?

He snorted, and the sound echoed strangely in the big copy room. It bounced around vacantly and Reno shut up fast. He was here to do one thing: prove Cloud wrong. It had only seemed a good idea after the third beer, but now it was downright brilliant. Maybe he shouldn't have done those whiskey shots.

No, no, he'd call it evidence. It was evidence that Reno was perfectly capable of sneaking around Shinra Headquarters and doing whatever the hell he wanted, even when a little alcohol got into his system. Proof to Cloud it'd be worth it to answer his question.

At least that's what he'd tell Cloud. Reno was mostly just doing this for the hell of it.

Reno had seen this main copy room during the day, and it was like the office equivalent of a mosh-pit. Reno was pretty sure he'd been stabbed by duller knives than some people's elbows the one time he'd come in here. It was actually a bit eerie in the dead silence of three in the morning though. Reno wouldn't admit that it freaked him out a little, especially with no backup to speak of, but he'd downed enough liquid courage tonight that he could easily brush it any concerns.

Resolve bolstered, Reno headed over to the least abused copy machine in the room. This one didn't have any paint chipping or unreadable buttons yet and looked sturdy enough to hold his weight. Reno hit the green power button and waited for it to warm up, while the redhead lazily folded papers into misshapen origami. When the machine hummed to wakefulness its parts inside groused loudly and there was some ominous creaking. It sounded ten years older than it was, and Reno had the sudden fear it would collapse under him. Then the image of him sitting on a flattened copy machine made him choke back laughter.

Reno popped open the lid and took a surreptitious glance around. If there were security cameras here they'd get an eyeful, but at the moment he didn't care if someone in some room across the compound saw him. Whatever. He'd get a slap on the wrist and have to clean the bathroom. Big deal.

And just like that he unbuckled and unzipped his pants and dropped them, then pulled his boxers down to his knees and hopped up onto the copier. It was more difficult than he'd anticipated, especially with his pants tangled around his, but he made due. A bruised heel was the only casualty as he hit the machine when he jumped up. Just as he'd firmly planted his bottom on the platen and hit the button to copy did he realize there was someone standing in the doorway.

It was a large silhouette, easily taller than Reno and quite a bit broader. As the guy took a couple of steps closer Reno could tell the cut of the suit was fine and that big physique fit it like a glove. Tailor-made clothes always meant grievance with Shinra—the only people who could afford it were the ones who could make your life hell.

_Shit, this isn't security._

The blue suit gave him away as the far end lights were flicked on.

There weren't a lot of people with that dark skin tone, so Reno recognized him immediately as a face he'd seen around Shinra before. The man was perfectly bald with a small goatee and an impressive number of earrings, but otherwise unmarked and his face unmoving. It was neither cold nor tense, just blank.

Even though Reno couldn't see his eyes behind the sunglasses—and really, sunglasses at 3am in a dark room?—there was something altogether unfriendly about his gaze. He just silently stared at Reno, who still with his pants down seated on the now unmoving copier. The beeping of the machine as the photocopy of Reno's ass was finished was obnoxiously loud.

Something told Reno the guy wasn't going to stand there much longer though. Deciding to get out before the linebacker of a man tackled him or worse, pulled a gun, Reno sat up straight and gave the newcomer his most mischievous grin. And then, because he had been drinking after all, and Reno wanted to thoroughly give the middle finger to Shinra authority, he hit the button again and let the machine scan his ass one more time.

He hopped down from the machine when the copier's started beeping again, taking extra care not to act the least bit self-conscious that he'd just flashed a man who didn't need a gun to kill him. With a half-assed salute he pulled up his pants and did up his belt again, making sure he didn't even look at the guy as he did so. Sometimes it paid to play up inebriation, at least when it came to faking confidence.

With a jaunty wave and an extra strut in his step, Reno headed for the door. He passed within a foot of the guy, and Reno's heart skipped two beats as he did it. He couldn't help peeking out of the corner of his eye as he passed. The man's dark eyes had slid over to watch him, and even behind the sunglasses his eyes were guarded. Reno wasn't sure what to think, so he kept walking rather than tempt fate. Just as he got to the door and almost home free, a shadow fell across the threshold.

_Fuck._

Reno kept up a litany of curses in his head even as he approached the latest arrival at the door. The newest guy merely watched Reno approach in silence, his face similarly devoid of expression. He reminded the redhead of a classic mafia leader with all the big guys—like Mr. Linebacker there—backing him up when he himself didn't look all that scary. Then again, that had been a totally incorrect first impression. By now his leadership was well ingrained in Reno, and the redhead knew better than to push the line. Reno hid the uncomfortable sense of walking the edge of a knife under another brilliant grin and a saucy wink, making sure to shake his ass a little more as he turned away.

Take that Tseng.

The moment he turned the next corner he was sprinting.

* * *

"Desperate for porn, Rude?"

The larger man didn't respond, though he did put the butt-print down on top of the copier, hitting the off button as he did so. Rude's eyes didn't linger on the rounded image, already putting the delinquency behind him. Tseng looked thoughtfully at the print but didn't say anything else as he left. Rude shook his head and tossed the copies into the trash on his way out.

_Juveniles…_

* * *

When he woke up, he knew he should have just gone back to sleep.

Cloud blearily sat up in the chaos of the room, the noise a thundering drum pounding out of synch with his head. The alcohol had shot his natural alarm for four AM and everyone else was awake by now.

Just thinking about last night was enough to make the hammering in his head worsen. The hangover he was sporting was phenomenal, and Cloud could only remember a headache this bad when a bandersnatch had knocked him out for a couple of minutes once—at least then there'd been something to kill in revenge. This time it was Reno's fault, and the blasted redhead didn't even seem to be suffering like he was.

In fact though, there was a lot of mayhem in the room at the moment, and Reno was hard to see. Boys were running around frantically, opening bags and personal belongings, ripping open mattresses and pillows, shouting at each other and generally making the loudest ruckus Cloud thought he'd ever heard this early in the morning. Were there bed checks happening? he wondered tiredly.

"Cloud! Hide your stuff! They could be coming anytime! Barker got caught with some bad stuff and you know they'll have our hides if someone here has some too!" Dan's panicky voice was hardly coherent above the roaring of Cloud's head. Cloud tried to tell Dan to get away from him and to just _shut the hell up_ but Reno popped into existence just inches in front of him.

"Painkiller Cloud?"

The blond didn't even thank him until he'd pop the pills and swallowed them dry. He wondered how long it would take to kick in—he hadn't taken medicine like that in at least ten years. Cloud shook off that thought. His voice was scratchy and still thick from sleep. "What's going on?"

Reno's open mouth shut as another boy came tumbling into their room at the same moment. Cloud knew he was in the bunker but couldn't put a name to the face. "SECONDS ARE COMING!"

There was a lot of sudden cursing, and people kicked into frenzied action. Dan and one other were hurriedly trying to peel back some of the concrete wall to hide something while a couple others had found a loose ceiling tile and were pushing bags of suspicious looking pills and needles in it. Barker, who Dan had said was the first one caught, was suspiciously missing. Cloud was still fumbling to understand why SOLDIERs were coming here and why people were panicking, but Reno seemed to know just fine.

"You're clean, right Cloud?" He looked only mildly concerned, more amused at the situation.

"Clean?" Reno's good humor wasn't contagious. He didn't seem to be suffering a hangover at all, much to the annoyance of Cloud.

"For drugs. You know, 'performance-enhancing' and all that." Reno made little quotations with his fingers around the word.

Cloud frowned at him. Of course he didn't do anything like that. Mako was notorious for not mixing well with other chemicals. It had been known to mutate people before, and that was the least of some of the side effects. Not that Cloud was supposed to know that.

"No." Cloud frowned. Drugs were a far more permanent way to get an edge and far more dangerous. Not to mention it was an easy way to get kicked straight out of the army with a dishonorable discharge.

Before Reno could get another word in, Dan came rushing back over, flailing his arms around and generally working himself up even more. Cloud didn't find this remotely funny though, because this was a _drug bust_ happening in his bunker and he was still hungover.

"Can I hide some stuff in your pillow case Cloud? Some guys from bunker C lent it to me to hold, and I think it might not be completely legal. I don't know where to put it." Dan almost looked on the verge of tears. The kid probably had no idea what anyone handed him and hadn't thought to ask.

Reno wasn't the least bit sympathetic though. "No way. You'll get Cloud in just as much trouble. Stuff it in your mattress and smooth it out and hope to the Planet nobody goes hunting for it." Dan gave Reno a final look, anger warring with gratitude, before darting up his bunk to do just that. Cloud and Reno exchanged a look though. They both knew that was the first place anyone was going to look.

The craziness of the room comically froze as the door was suddenly kicked in.

"Cadets of the SOLDIER program!" It was a big Second Class SOLDIER who filled the doorway, huge in both stature and voice making everyone jump. This obviously wasn't someone you messed with, and he was looking quite annoyed to be up early on a Sunday. "It has come to our attention that some of the cadets have been abusing performance-enhancing drugs and similar substances. The illegal substances have been traced back here to this bunker. In order to clean out this mess, everyone is to be escorted upstairs while the room is thoroughly swept. Anyone who disobeys those orders or refuses to cooperate is out!"

And so the siege began.

Cloud wasn't even dressed yet, but all the sleepiness in him had fled at the sight of four Second Class SOLDIERs and their officer standing in the hallway outside like a prisoner's guard. _This_ had never happened before. There was no way he'd have forgotten a shock like this.

The entire bunker was marched down the hall with their SOLDIER entourage. Not that any of these cadets were particularly dangerous, but the escort was there so no one bolted. It doubled as a walk of shame too when other cadets popped their heads out open doors, crowding to get a look at both the SOLDIERs in full uniform looking menacing and their prisoners.

Their jeering faces and the whispers didn't really bother Cloud as much as how bad this situation was. This didn't happen before, Cloud was sure of it, and that frightened him more than he thought possible. He was walking blind. Not that he had anything to really be afraid of—he certainly didn't have any drugs on him or in him—but he was now associated with it through his bunkmates, and that could really stain him in the future.

It was a domino effect Cloud didn't even want to consider. To say the least, he'd have to revise his plan for SOLDIER if they kicked him out on suspicion of possession, sale, or use of drugs. This would likewise mean he'd lose Zack over distance and Sephiroth before he even knew him, since he wouldn't stay in Midgar to be in the regulation army. It would also force the blond to do things from a physically and socially lower level of power. While the other boys feared expulsion and punishment, Cloud was more concerned he'd have nothing but materia and a cheap sword to face down Jenova.

Shinra looked down on illegal activity, especially since it basically wrote the laws, but much of the company secretly encouraged those exact activities from behind closed doors—but not everything was condoned, and SOLDIER was stricter than any other department. They were a far more closely-knit group, and there were some things that just weren't accepted. Drugs were among those, and not only because of the potentially devastating effects when mixed with mako.

Cloud had known from Zack's memories and stories how important fighting was to SOLDIER, particularly as you moved up the ranks. Challenges were hard to come by unless someone had leave to go to the roughest places on the planet and kill some of the powerful beasts there, so within Shinra fighting was a highly coveted sport. SOLDIERs could really only find challenges from other SOLDIERs, so any advantage other than natural ones (excluding mako) were heavily frowned upon. Not only could it get someone in legal trouble—and likely a visit from the science department—but he'd also never get promoted with that reputation. Getting in and up in SOLDIER on your own two feet was probably the biggest unwritten rule in Shinra.

Of course, none of Cloud's bunkmates had gotten that memo, and somehow his own bunker had been the drug dealer's stash hold. Cloud hoped it just meant forking over a little blood to clear his name, but considering what the room they just entered looked like, that didn't seem likely.

The seven boys left in the bunker were grouped together and lead into an unmarked, completely empty room. It looked like it could have been some sort of storage room, without windows and just one lone light bulb. It was cramped and bound to get hot with so many people in it, and Cloud was annoyed at how SOLDIER was toying with them. Reno next to him was watching the other boys with interest and not a little glee. He must have been clean too and utterly unconcerned about consequences for him to be so happy.

"Think they'll take us out back to the firing squad, Dan?" Reno nudged the shaking boy, almost causing him to stumble.

"Shut up Reno." Cloud grumbled under his breath as the SOLDIERs left the room with their first hostage in hand. The other six boys in the room were left alone then, and murmurs broke out after the first couple of minutes in the thickening silence. People wondered aloud what had happened to Barker, who from the sounds of it had been caught red-handed last night, and what was happening to the kid who'd just been pulled out. No one had any idea what to expect, so the tension built up more as they theorized and slowly began to get hysterical together—and hysteria was always multiplied in groups. Reno quietly egging it on wasn't helping at all. A couple of not-so-innocent comments would be enough to snap the already dangerously nervous Dan, which would set off the whole room. Add in a small, empty closet and no information whatsoever, and it was obviously a deliberate ploy to get them to talk.

Reno was being more of a Turk than usual, SOLDIER was being more ingenious than usual, and Shinra was letting everyone get away with it because it was, well, Shinra.

Cloud was pretty sure he was feeling more fear than nervousness right now; there was no way he could be immune to the atmosphere of the room. His stomach had stopped roiling with nausea and instead lurched with anxiety. It wasn't an improvement, even with the headache slowly fading. Cloud couldn't wait for this to end. He was clean and he knew it, but that didn't make him feel all that better. Dan may have asked to hide something in his things, but most guys wouldn't do that, and Cloud knew someone could have slipped something under his mattress while he was dead to the world. His sleep was far deeper than usual—just his luck—and if someone was covert about it, there could be something under his bed he wasn't aware of. Not only had he been drunk, he'd been exhausted too. Cloud couldn't rely on Reno to have kept it all at bay because he'd been just as drunk as Cloud last night.

Cloud clamped down on the tide of worried thoughts before he lost himself. He was human too and was just responding to the panic. One guy looked on the verge of tears, and Cloud knew he'd probably be the next one taken out. They were slowly eating the numbers away without telling anyone where they were going or what happened to them. Without knowing if anyone else confessed or pointed fingers, the noose was tightening around all of their necks. Somebody would cave.

"Clever huh." Cloud said to himself, but Reno must have overheard him.

"Panic 'til they talk. Guess SOLDIER's more than just brawn." Reno was positively beaming, though Cloud spied a bead of sweat slip down Reno's neck. "Knew I joined for a reason."

The door swung open with two SOLDIERs standing in the doorway, effectively blocking any sight of the hallway. Instead of pulling out the guy in tears, Dan was called out. Cloud watched in mild confusion as Dan was walked out with a SOLDIER at his side. He hadn't really expected that, but maybe they were waiting for more guys to succumb first. Dan _did_ look like he was going to hyperventilate soon.

The wait was longer this time, and the anxiety in the room spiked with it. Just as Cloud was becoming convinced the breaking point would be soon, the door opened again. This time a _First Class SOLDIER_ was at the door, and he looked just as unhappy to see them as Cloud did to see him. There were only a handful of Firsts, so for one of them to be getting involved with a cadet drug bust meant there was something bigger happening.

"Cloud Strife. Reno… Reno."

The redhead didn't snicker or comment, belying how nervous he actually was. No matter how bad Reno might have been under the plate, he'd probably never had SOLDIERs boring down on him like this before, especially ones at this level.

They were escorted out of the room with a small contingent of SOLDIERs, though Cloud figured they were more for the intimidation factor than anything else. Maybe they were off-duty and needed something to do. Scaring cadets had to be more fun than the usual training exercises. As much as Cloud tried to make himself feel better, he knew he was giving in to his nerves. This was just getting more serious. Maybe there was more than just performance-enhancing drugs in the bunker? A bomb? Or some kind of conspiracy happening?

His legs had goose bumps on them and he tried to tell himself it was from the cold. He was only in his t-shirt and boxers from last night, without shoes even, and the hallways were heavily air conditioned here. Cloud didn't feel self-conscious as much as he felt fearful. Not that he could have done anything to these SOLDIERs, but he always felt more comfortable with armor and a weapon on him—or at least pants.

Reno was better off than Cloud was; at least he had more than just sleepwear on. He'd managed to get on a pair of pants before being dragged out the door and his hair had been pulled back. With his usual sarcasm and a little early-morning bite, his words could be sharp as Vincent's with the right encouragement.

"Cadet Reno and Cadet Strife." They were stopped together at the end of the hall. To Reno's left were the elevators, one normal and one glass. On Cloud's right was another door at the end of the hall, devoid of all decoration. There was something intimidating about seeing a solid metal door on a carpeted and otherwise normal hallway that gave Cloud the chills.

"Several of your members have pointed to you as close friends of Daniel Gavish. You'll be interviewed and tested separately from the others."

Cloud couldn't see Reno's face without completely turning, so he settled for focusing on calming his own rising fear. Of course, somebody would rat, and Dan was a perfect choice since nobody was overly fond of him to begin with. Top that with something really illegal and this was inevitable.

He did feel bad for Dan though in the corner of his mind. The poor boy had been asking for it with his attitude and naiveté, but it didn't mean Cloud didn't have sympathy. He could understand the peer pressure as a cadet to help out others, especially given his own past. Still, Cloud felt mildly annoyed that it was a _friend_ that had landed him in such a volatile situation. Moments like this reminded him of why he trusted so few.

The groups split, with Reno going to the elevators and Cloud to the metal door. As they approached it, it buzzed to be opened, which was always a bad sign.

The room inside was a standard interrogation room. One desk sat facing the wall opposite the door with a stiff metal chair in front of it. Classic to keep a prisoner's back to the door to unconsciously reiterate that he had no power. The walls were concrete without any markings, just nails set in at even intervals marking it as some kind of powerful steel and definitely soundproof.

Cloud noticed too how the desk and chair were both nailed to the floor and how the door was actually reinforced steel triggered to open only by a control panel somewhere else. Most likely behind one of the blank walls on either side, one of which he knew was probably a one-way mirror for viewing purposes. It had to be Zack's memories that told him these things, because Cloud couldn't recall if he'd ever actually been properly interrogated in a room like this before.

Unfortunately, rooms like this were also designed with psychology in mind; to make some crack faster. At the moment it was working. Cloud hadn't been self-conscious before, but he was now distinctly aware of his lack of clothing. He had his skin and some thin cotton covering him, and no shoes against the cold floor. He felt naked and prone to attack, a feeling Cloud had not revisited in years and one he knew he hated.

His stomach was finally settling though, probably because it was much too late to back out or hide. His headache though had come back. The room was too tight, too plain, too much like a prison cell for his comfort, and he wasn't sure if the throbbing in his skull was from his hangover or something else.

One SOLDIER detached himself from the group at the door and led Cloud over to the chair. The blond felt like he should be shackled or something, or at the very least handcuffed to the desk leg, but no one restrained him. The SOLDIERs retreated and he was left in the room alone.

* * *

Zack flopped down on to one of the plastic seats before the window. Cloud was sitting stiffly at the table in the interrogation room, looking nervous and clearly trying to hide it. Zack gave him points for trying.

"Any bets Seph?"

The General didn't respond, merely watched Cloud carefully. Zack shrugged at his silence and slouched into his seat as much as possible. It was technically a posture chair, but he managed to get around that.

There were two other men in the side room. One was the control officer, who activated the door and the lighting along with the controlling the temperature and other features of the room if necessary. He wasn't really needed, but the guy was probably bored and wanted something to do. Next to Zack and standing by the General was Kunsel, usually a foreign duty SOLDIER who was conveniently back in Midgar this week. He was Zack's old friend and a trusted officer of Sephiroth's.

"You sure you don't want to back out now, Kunsel?"

Kunsel turned to look at Zack, a smirk on his tan face and his copper hair all mussed up. "Ha! Like I'd lose that bet, Zack. I'll just bark a bit, no bite, and I'm sure we'll see who's right." He winked cheerily at Zack.

"Just know that I warned ya." Zack threw in cheekily, "Don't take him nearly as lightly as he looks."

Kunsel was a SOLDIER Second, stationed on Mideel and at the cusp of the SOLDIER First level, though was unable to become one at the moment for lack of space. He made up for it though with his general Turkish-ness. Zack was glad Kunsel wasn't a Turk as he'd told the man before, but Kunsel just laughed in response. He didn't seem that opinionated either way.

Kunsel was second in command of all foreign duty SOLDIERs in Mideel, Fort Condor, and on the surrounding islands. That was his official job at least. He reported back to Zack, and therefore Sephiroth, on various events in the area, along with the three First Class SOLDIERs on the field in his area and their lieutenants. Within SOLDIER there was more loyalty to the General than to Shinra, and sometimes reports to the brass were "edited" whereas the ones that landed on the General's desk were not. Kunsel was among those who reported back without omission, essentially one of the many spades in the General's pocket.

Since the Second was back in Midgar for tests, in-person reports, and other busywork, Zack had called an old favor of him. The First never thought for a moment Cloud had anything to do with performance-enhancing drugs. Still, it was unfortunate his bunker was implemented in the crime, and even worse Cloud's friend had been the biggest holder of them in their room. Granted, Gavish had blubbered like a baby and so far proved himself to be pathetic, but not guilty of anything more than idiocy. Everyone was bound by the rules though, and for something as serious as this all leads had to be investigated.

That's why Zack asked Kunsel to do Cloud's interview. He was an established interrogator since the war, and Zack knew the guy could be trusted not to go too far with Cloud. The General had already assigned Kunsel to do one anyway if an interrogation was needed, so Zack liked to think he hadn't really done anything he shouldn't have.

Sephiroth's disapproving look had been worth the bet he'd made with Kunsel though. Zack's friend had no idea what he was getting himself into. Even if Cloud didn't make an intimidating picture with his wild, bed-ridden hair and boxers—boringly plaid too, which Zack was going to remedy the next excuse he could find—the First pegged the blond as formidable and harder to break than Kunsel would expect.

"Daunting, huh, Zack? At least he doesn't have cactuars on his pajamas." Kunsel had one of his famous boyish grins, all teeth and dimples.

Zack pretended to look affronted and punched Kunsel in the arm. "Stop belittling my cadet."

"Thought you were gonna say chocobo there for a second, Zack." Kunsel was still snickering, but this time Zack took a shot at the man's kidney. "Hey hey hey, low blow." He put his hands up in mock surrender. "I'll lay off, I get it."

Zack snorted but let it drop. Kunsel would get his comeuppance soon.

The General left not long after coming in. He had to make rounds to where the other boys were. Drug abuse, especially performance-enhancing ones, was considered a serious issue in the army, but this time they'd gotten in deeper—how was still being investigated. Other bunkers were being threatened with the consequences if they didn't talk, but this bunker got the worst windfall.

The investigation didn't really need the General's supervision, but Sephiroth needed to stretch his legs anyway, and Zack knew he would take any legitimate chance to get out of the office. That, and now he needed to pop in on the bunker's interviews. The redhead would probably cause trouble. Not that Zack thought Tseng couldn't handle him, but he did wonder why the Turks had offered to help by interviewing Reno. Maybe that had their eye on him and wanted to snatch him out of SOLDIER recruitment if he did well? The Turks did that often enough.

Well, Sephiroth would be coming by later and hopefully Kunsel would be quick and painless. Still, if he wanted to do this questioning his way Zack wished he'd brought popcorn.

* * *

The door buzzed and Cloud fought the sudden urge to flinch as a doctor walked around the side of the desk to him. He had the generic white coat with a bland smile on his face in front of an unreadable expression. There was some relief it wasn't Hojo, but the sight of the needle was enough to make Cloud break out in a sweat. He dug his fingers into his legs to focus on something else, grinding his teeth as the technician went to work. Cloud looked away towards the opposite wall as blood was drawn into a needle. He focused as hard as he could on the nails, trying to imagine how much teasing he'd get from Zack when this was all over.

When the scientist was gone, it was just Cloud and one other man.

He was clearly a SOLDIER, top notch no doubt although he wore a nonspecific uniform that could mean he was of any rank. He was fairly handsome and probably had his nose broken on several occasions from what Cloud could tell of his profile. He had burnished-gold hair, maybe not as tall as Zack, though he was leaner, built for speed. Cloud had never seen him before, but the man's hard attitude was already coming across. He crossed his arms in front of his chest, biceps flexed enough to draw attention to harsh looking tattoo of a hook. He looked down at the seated Cloud with a mixture of boredom and vague arrogance.

Cloud instantly disliked him, though his expression didn't show it. His hangover might be painful, but antagonizing the interrogator could put him in for far worse than that. The consequences of a bad interview here could be very far reaching.

"Cloud Strife… country boy from nowhere trying to get a leg up in the world." The interrogator wandered around the table lazily, only sparing Cloud the briefest of glances. "This is your chance to get out of the sleepy town, no? If you're found guilty on any drug related charges that future disappears. Helping out the investigation will grant you leniency. You could still be an officer in the regulation army."

Cloud remained silent following the unappealing offer. He didn't know anything about the drugs, so the deal was pointless to him. The interrogator had to offer it though to see if it would sweeten his tongue.

"All right then, let's be frank. The supply of drugs was too large for any one man, and your bunker had quite the haul. Were you associated with the 'business'?"

"No." Cloud met his eyes flatly, refusing to be afraid.

"I'm inclined to disagree."

Cloud stayed silent. There was no response to that other than a repeated no.

The interrogator didn't look away, but he suddenly moved faster than Cloud's sight, abruptly leaning over the desk and invading his personal space in seconds. Cloud flinched back before he even realized it. Knowing that was what the man was going for, he tried to physically relax a bit and not show any sign of being unnerved. Any tell might make him look guilty.

"You knew about the drugs at the very least, and instead of reporting it like a good boy you kept your silence. Or maybe you were even in on it. Am I right?" The SOLDIER had a really confrontational tone to his voice that just begged to be argued with. Cloud did his best to be immune, though a small part of him dearly wanted to put this guy in his place. That was what the SOLDIER was going for though.

"No."

Here the interrogator's hands held the other side of the desk as he leaned back from Cloud, perhaps contemplating his next move. There was something incredibly conceited about his whole stance that irritated Cloud. "Then you actually helped in the trading of them? Or bought some yourself?"

"No."

"Were you associated or not?"

"I wasn't." He shifted his feet to rest against the legs of the chair before he thought about it. The sudden cold felt good on his hot body. The tension was getting to him even as he denied it. He didn't miss the way the interrogator's eyes jumped down to the table, and Cloud knew he'd seen the action.

"But you are now."

"No." He resisted the urge to cross his arms defensively. That could be a real tell in interrogation and a sign of lying. Cloud only wanted to cross them as some kind of unconscious defense against the accusations the interrogator was making. He was trying to get a rise out of Cloud by making the blond sound unfairly guilty, and it was slowly working.

Too slowly though. The interrogator switched tactics and started to fire off rapid questions. He got worked up as he did, and Cloud's voice echoed as he responded to the increasing volume too. It was impossible to think while he defended himself, because pausing for even a moment would give the guy an inch.

"Where did they get the drugs from?"

"I don't know."

"Who are they selling them to?"

"I don't know."

"Who else used them?"

"I don't know."

"What kind of edge were you looking for by using drugs?!"

"I don't use drugs!"

"Do you know that drugs like those are illegal in Shinra?!"

"Yes!"

"You know that it will end your career here if you use them!"

"Yes!"

"Do you use them?!"

"No!"

" _You aren't good enough to be in SOLDIER!"_

Cloud didn't respond to the last one, his stunned silence more than enough. That was a hard blow and the interrogator knew it—though he had no idea how much. The SOLDIER just smiled, and it was a little sinister because his voice was a calm as though they hadn't just been shouting at each other.

"You were weaker than your classmates so you resorted to drugs."

"No!" Cloud nearly shouted that denial. It reverberated in the room and the SOLDIER's smug look made Cloud's face flush with rage. Physical weakness wasn't something Cloud coped well with anymore; it had been too long. He could feel insecurity about himself creeping up, the ever-lingering fears that mako was the only thing that made him strong, and he ruthlessly shoved it away. Mako didn't equal a great strategy in battle or the ability to lead others, but the interrogator had hit the underlying flaw.

His answer hadn't even been conscious, and Cloud felt stupid as soon as he realized he'd given in to that trick. Great emotion caused great slips, and the interrogator had obviously been looking for the nerve. He'd hit it too, but Cloud was above this game. He knew what the interrogator was up to, and he should have been prepared for that.

Sensing this change, the interrogator's green eyes became much sharper than before. Cloud hoped there wasn't a deeper motive to getting him to confess to having drugs, because it didn't look like this was slowing down any time soon.

"Then what do you call that jump in ability, Cloud? Your records show it plain as day. It's around the same time you befriended Reno and Dan, isn't it?" The SOLDIER's hands were clenched around the edge of the desk and were actually wearing holes into it in the shape of his fingers. The smirk playing at his lips when Cloud's eyes darted to the white-knuckled grip meant he knew what he was doing too. It was an unspoken threat: _I could crush you with my hands._

Cloud, his eyes lingering on the slowly bending metal of the table—a feat he'd once been able to do without thought—brought to mind a ludicrous idea:

Telling the interrogator. Spilling the whole story about the time traveling and the Planet's part in all this. They'd definitely think he was on drugs then, talking about how he'd killed the greatest swordsman in the world and never been happy about it, how he'd saved the world from Hojo and Shinra, how the remnants had run amok, and how suddenly he'd woken up sixteen again and completely alone, forced to start over.

Cloud only entertained it for a couple of seconds, actually finding the thought rather funny. The interrogator's expression of surprise and disbelief might be worth it at the beginning, but getting kicked out of Shinra for "mental instability" wouldn't.

The blond must have paused too long because the interrogator launched right in again.

"Tell me the drugs had something to do with it!" His hands broke off the desk and actually took chunks with it. Cloud was hit with some of the debris and he knew this guy had to be First or Second class if he was strong enough to do that. Cloud actually felt a small sting of fear. He knew he wouldn't actually be physically hurt, but it didn't help that Cloud knew how easy it was for the enhanced to hurt regular civilians—and from personal experience too.

"They didn't." It was a little weaker than Cloud had hoped it sounded.

The interrogator's lips twitched up for just a moment, but he hid the feral grin. It was enough though to tell Cloud he'd caught that slip. Guess he wasn't an interrogator for nothing. "Then what did Cloud?" His voice was soft, hardly a whisper, and Cloud had to lean forward slightly to hear it. He knew this wasn't going anywhere good but if he didn't cooperate things would be far worse. If he stayed totally silent it would just put more pressure on him. "Zack?"

Cloud flinched.

"Ah… Zack Fair. He's been helping you out, hasn't he? For… some favors, you got some real help and maybe more, is that it?" His voice rose again at the end, an innocent look about him that clashed horribly with the picture he painted. Cloud was frozen in his seat, horrified and nearly seeing red at the accusations.

"N-no." It came out more choked than he intended, but there was a hot bubble of rage in his stomach at the thought that was cutting off his words. _Favors?! Him? With_ Zack _?!_ Not to mention the Second was implying the Lieutenant-General of SOLDIER might have given him or even allowed him to use performance-enhancing drugs.

"No? You're not protecting anyone Cloud." That struck another nerve, this one worst than the last. Cloud and Zack's relationship was a sensitive topic and even AVALANCHE had treaded carefully around that issue. Even the most graceless of bastards—Cid for one—knew better than to poke it. To say that Cloud wasn't guarding anybody when that was all he was trying to do made him genuinely angry.

Cloud's fists were clenched under the table and he wanted to lash out and hit the interrogator so bad his nails were about to draw blood. What did he know about him and Zack? How dare he imply Cloud slept with Zack to get something from him? Like he was only worth his body and nothing else! There were some lines, even in interrogation, that shouldn't get crossed, and for Cloud that was one of them.

"There's nothing. I have nothing to do with the drugs and Zack isn't related to this." He spat out the words more harshly than he originally meant, but he relished in the silence it brought. That was his stance and this guy had nothing on it. There was no way he could think Zack condoned drugs, and no way Zack would let some Second accuse him of extorting sex.

The response was in a smooth, even voice, saturated in malice. "I think Fair is related. Some of that stash was laced with mako. Now where would a bunch of cadets get that if not through a 'friend'?" The interrogator looked like the cat with the cream at this, and his overbearing confidence was really setting Cloud's ire off. Worse though, he had a point. Cloud was the only connection in that bunker to any SOLDIERs. Not that SOLDIERs had standing access to mako either, but they interacted the most of any department with the science department. It wasn't an impossible conclusion but it was still flimsy by the blond's measure. Even so, the look on the interrogator's face said he was already writing Cloud off.

"I. Don't. Know." He ground out the words, tightly leashed anger in every one of them. The interrogator's answering smile wasn't as full as it could be, and Cloud knew he was getting to the man.

* * *

"Damn, did you see Kunsel's face in the beginning? You missed it Seph, Cloud threw him for a real loop." Zack leaned back in his chair smiling stupidly at the ongoing proceedings. Kunsel's words and Cloud short responses were in the background.

The General stood by the window having come in to watch as Cloud's fists tightened under the table. Kunsel had hit a nerve by bringing up Zack, even though everyone knew the idea of Zack selling drugs was perfectly ridiculous. Technically Zack was a lead through Cloud, but only because he had easier access to mako then most. Kunsel was poking this beehive to see if Cloud would implicate himself in a bid to defend his friend—admitting he'd stolen Zack's ID card or something to that effect.

"I didn't think Kunsel would have to go that low, but he can't exactly play good cop/bad cop this late in the game," Zack added. He'd given Kunsel permission to drag his name into this. Even Zack was immune from a bit of curiosity about Cloud, and Kunsel thought he might be able to get something out of Cloud through his handful of friends.

Sephiroth didn't respond to the comment though, his focus still on the vividly furious boy. Cloud seemed to take poorly to the idea of sleeping around for favors, but that wasn't surprising. Sephiroth was more interested in what else Kunsel could draw out of the cadet. The Second had been briefed on Cloud and seen his profile. The General had hinted that Strife's sudden change of grades was of mild concern to him too.

Sephiroth knew though that Kunsel took Zack's opinion to heart, and from what he'd heard Cloud didn't seem the type to use drugs for an edge. Sephiroth agreed on that point, even when taking into account Cloud's abrupt change, but the interview had to be thorough nonetheless.

"I think he's really pissed Cloud off now." Instead of sounding pleased to see Kunsel take some heat as Sephiroth expected, Zack looked concerned, and the First left his chair to stand with him. "See his face. Total shutdown."

Sephiroth looked back over in surprise. Cloud had gone from noxiously angry to cold. His blue eyes watched Kunsel as he questioned him about materia practice and his sessions with Zack, but he didn't respond with anything longer than a flat no. Kunsel tried a different tactic, weaving questions together that required more than two word answers, but if it got too complicated Cloud sat silently, relentless and frigid. It was… disturbing to see, and out of character as far as Sephiroth knew.

Zack wasn't laughing now as Kunsel glanced discreetly at the one-way mirror. He was clearly taken aback. Cloud had been tolerant before, but he'd obviously been reacting to the accusations behind a stoic façade—clenching fists, twitching toes, the burn behind his eyes. But now it was, as Zack put it, a total shutdown. He'd gone cold; wasn't giving an inch anymore and looked frighteningly blank.

Kunsel was winding down as he realized he wasn't getting any reactions anymore no matter what he said. The blood work would come back soon, and they'd have results to match this against. With a nod from the General, the buzzer sounded and Kunsel left the room. Cloud was left staring stiffly at the wall, unmoving.

Zack turned to greet Kunsel grimly as he entered the booth. "General. Zack." He nodded to them both. He was smiling slightly but he also looked concerned under it. "You weren't kidding Zack, he really isn't like the outside package."

Zack turned to look back out at Cloud, who was staring stonily at the one-way mirror, almost like he could see through it and right at them. Zack was a little thankful Cloud's stare wasn't directed at him, but out of the corner of his eye the SOLDIER noticed the hairs on Kunsel's arm rising. Cloud was glaring right at him.

Zack visibly shivered. _Weird._

"I wasn't expecting that at all." Zack turned back to Kunsel confused, and it looked for a moment like he'd had a chill too. Sephiroth watched the interaction from the sidelines, contemplating as he watched Cloud from the corner of his eye.

"You laughed when I went in aggressive and arrogant, but he _does_ look effeminate and easy to crack. Records even say he got bullied a lot—you know being a bully is a surefire way to rile up a victim. He was definitely getting worked up in the beginning at all the accusations, but it wasn't like that." Kunsel waved over at the blond's back to indicate the still coldly reserved cadet. The Second leaned back against the wall in a casual pose, like he was trying to dismiss the tense atmosphere. He wasn't completely convincing. "I thought for sure when I said you were selling him the drugs he's snap, especially since I'd been so close with sleeping around. But well…"

"Yeah," Zack agreed, and they both looked back into the interrogation room to where Cloud had been sitting. "I've never seen him cut off like that, just bam!—cold. That's Sephiroth territory, not Cloud's."

Sephiroth didn't react to that comment. He privately agreed with him.

"Well there's definitely something there I'd say. In my opinion, General, the cadet's clean when it comes to the drugs. The rest though… the recent records do look a little funny." Kunsel shrugged a bit, looking a little more relaxed now that someone was inside the interrogation room to escort Cloud out. The Second wasn't being glared down so hard anymore. "As for that… non-reaction, he's a teenager, Zack, and he's got a simple profile. There's only so much that could have caused that—abuse, trauma, abandonment? Maybe you remind him of a friend or his father or something, and making a slur on you is like a slur on him?"

Kunsel didn't look particularly convinced of his own logic, and Zack looked a little ill at the thought.

Not long after Kunsel gave his thoughts, the two SOLDIERs left the observation room in strange moods. Sephiroth didn't have a word to classify it, but he hoped it faded in time. Zack would be unbearable if he didn't sort himself out soon. Kunsel at least didn't spend hours at a time with Sephiroth, but the quandary Cloud possessed would probably eat at him too. Kunsel had always liked puzzles a little too much. Sephiroth at the moment just wanted to get to the bottom of it before this got out of hand.

He pulled the screen closed for the one-way mirror and stepped out of the room a moment later, dismissing the control technician as he left. The man turned off the controls and left after buzzing the interview room open. He headed down the corridor while Sephiroth exited into the hallway and looped back to the reinforced steel door.

A burly SOLDIER had just stepped out of the room with Strife in tow when the General addressed him by name. "Grant, leave Cadet Strife there one moment. I'll have a word with him."

Grant stiffened a little in surprise and Sephiroth ignored it. The Second Class SOLDIER walked Cloud back inside the room to the desk and seated him again, then held the door open for the General. "Knock when you'd like to be buzzed out, sir."

Sephiroth nodded before entering the room.

Cloud Strife was seated with his back to the door, his hair spiked up in all directions, still tussled from sleep. He had a thin grey t-shirt on and boxers; Sephiroth could see his bare legs and feet from under the chair. His heels didn't quite touch the floor.

The General took his time perusing the cadet, knowing the only thing watching him was the camera in the far corner, and even that was turned off. Strife was of a short stature, a little leaner than Zack with broad shoulders and a narrower waist. He was hardly intimidating in his pajamas, but his cold demeanor, though lessened now, still gave the area around him a frosty quality. He sensed irritation and tension from the cadet.

"Cloud Strife."

The boy didn't jump as expected, didn't even flinch. Sephiroth refused to be impressed.

He kept up a steady pace as he walked from side to side behind the boy, making sure to stay only on the edge of his peripheral vision. Not seeing the demon was far more frightening than the actual sight, were his self-depreciating thoughts.

"You have been charged with potential smuggling, drug-use, and the sale of illegal performance-enhancing drugs. The charges carry triple the punishment and guaranteed jail time because of the inclusion of a protected and highly volatile substance."

Strife didn't move or even twitch. It barely even looked like he was breathing. Sephiroth didn't doubt the cadet was listening though.

"Do you maintain your position?"

There was a hesitation before he spoke. Whether out of fear, a lie, or something else, Sephiroth didn't know. "Yes."

It wasn't a man's voice, but not that of a boy either. And that was exactly what Cloud was. Something in between established norms, and it irked Sephiroth now more than ever as he realized it. Strife certainly hadn't been anything extraordinary up until recently: average marks, below average physicals, a black and white personal history. But then he'd impressed Zack, won the First's favor, looked Sephiroth directly in the eye, and seen a sharp upturn in marks in all classes, even materia, that had even Zack raising an eyebrow. Why now? It couldn't just be Zack's tutoring that explained it. Kunsel had gotten nowhere when he'd tried to hit at that particularly issue.

The General came to stop just centimeters behind Cloud. He heard the catch in Cloud's breath and could see the increased pulse rate in his wrist, the blood pumping frantically under pale skin. It was the first true reaction since he'd shutdown with Kunsel.

Sephiroth wasn't sure what he wanted out of this boy. He only knew that he'd been a persistent niggling in the back of his mind since their first meeting that had now become full-blown. He had a prime chance to see if he could unravel some of the mystery now, but the General wasn't sure how to go about it or if he'd even get much, given how far Kunsel had already driven him. Still, that didn't stop him. Sephiroth did what he thought might work best, regardless of how it might be viewed. He'd always functioned like that. His instincts were still well honed even after the war, and he liked to keep his claws sharp. Even Cloud Strife couldn't change that.

Besides, he had every right to do this; after all, a Turk was doing the other interrogation.

Sephiroth leaned over Cloud, catching both of the boy's wrists and pinning them to the table, hands splayed. Using his superior mass and weight, he flattening the cadet's palms onto the desk, his chin brushing the sides of those golden spikes as his hair pooled around them. Cloud's skin felt clammy but smooth, and he could feel the outline of the tight muscles in his lower arms and hands. His hair smelled just like the cheap shampoo made and distributed by Shinra but was quite soft.

This close to Strife, Sephiroth could detect any lie—the faintest hint of hesitation, sound, movement, he'd be ready for it. Not to mention the intimidation and fear aroused by the predator literally breathing on your neck, hands locked to the table, had made some of the toughest Wutain warriors wet themselves. Normally he didn't like this kind of personal interrogation, but Strife was different.

"Did you have anything to do with the drugs?"

The blond's pulse shot up under Sephiroth's hands as his voice ghosted his ear. The cadet was staring straight ahead, but he turned ever so slightly into Sephiroth's words and leaned his head forward, unconsciously bowing to the pressure. He didn't answer immediately, but Sephiroth could see the darkening tint of Cloud's neck at this angle. He couldn't be sure if that was adrenaline or embarrassment, but probably a mixture of both.

"No." Cloud breathed out, and it didn't sound very solid to the General's ears, but it was sincere, Sephiroth knew that much immediately.

The General's tight grip on Cloud's wrists was just short of bruising. He didn't know why that soft murmur affected him so strongly, but he knew Cloud Strife was only proving to be stranger with every meeting. The urge to do something more physical to get the words out of Strife was growing, but the General stifled it. Now was neither the place nor time.

He still had one more question and there was no point being subtle about it. "What are you hiding, Cloud Strife?"

The cadet didn't move; he'd practically turned to stone except that his pulse was flying under Sephiroth's fingers. With all the patience of a cat holding the mouse in its paws, Sephiroth waited for some response.

Cloud licked his dry lips, shifting forward even more. Sephiroth's nose was almost buried in the blond's hair, the texture very soft against his skin. Cloud's scent was overwhelming for a second—woodsy even in this metal city.

"I-"

Sephiroth didn't move, made no sound at all. His breathing was so quiet he had trouble hearing it over the staggering breaths Cloud was taking. From his angle he could see a line of sweat sliding down the boys collar and into his shirt.

"I don't know." Cloud Strife turned his full head away then to the right, shadowing his face in the poor lighting of the room to hide it. It was a dead giveaway that Cloud definitely knew what Sephiroth was talking about, but already the red was receding from Strife's neck. One more question would probably push him back into stoicism and the General would get nothing more.

After a prolonged moment he released Cloud's wrists, pulled up and stepped back in one swift movement. Sephiroth hesitated, not sure what to say to end this. As the General he couldn't offer encouragement or his opinion on whether Cloud would be suffering punishment or not. He didn't feel in the position to be more cordial after that intimidation factor he'd just used, and he felt unaccountably awkward. He'd done what was necessary, he told himself. Cloud _was_ hiding something and they both knew it.

So he finally just nodded his head and slipped out a smooth "Strife". After a moment he turned his back on the cadet, displeased and filled with a strange energy. He was sure that talk had been both successful and unsuccessful, though how he couldn't quite describe. Sephiroth rapped the door soundly as he mulled over that conundrum. It buzzed open and the General strode out.

Cloud, meanwhile, was frozen to his chair as Sephiroth made his departure. He couldn't believe that had just happened. Had Sephiroth noticed? His boxers didn't hide anything and the man had been leaning over him like a-

Cloud stopped that thought immediately before he could fully process it. His erection wasn't fading and he tried to stop himself from thinking about what had caused it. The General's hair, his velvet purr, and the way he held Cloud down, how everything about him was more real than anything Cloud could imagine.

Cloud wrenched his stiff arms up and rubbed them down his face, trying and failing to find that blank space again now that Sephiroth was gone. The room was heavy with his fear and embarrassment. The last thing Cloud wanted to think about was Sephiroth's last question, but the only other thing he could think about was Sephiroth's shoulders framing his own, the grip and strength of his hands… Cloud shook his head violently. He needed to think about something else, anything else so he didn't have to walk down that hall with a SOLDIER and a hard-on popping out of his shorts.

A little frantic that someone would come in soon, he did the only thing he could think of. Standing up was a little painful, but he moved to the corner of the desk pressed his rigid flesh against the side. The metal desk was ice cold from the air conditioner they pumped into this room. As soon as the heated skin touched it Cloud wanted to cry out. His arousal flagged in time for him to stand up as the door buzzed. He shifted away from the desk and let his face fall back into a standard, blank expression. He knew he was probably still red, but hopefully that could just be passed off for an encounter with the General.

The SOLDIER that came to get him was the same one. He must have been talking with the General while Cloud sat there because Sephiroth could be seen striding away down the corridor. Cloud couldn't dwell on the way Sephiroth's hair flicked from side to side as he moved because the SOLDIER grabbed his arm to snap him back to reality.

"You blood test says you're clear. I'll escort you back to your bunker."

Cloud let out a loose breath, though it wasn't out of relief. He had to keep his body in control right now because images of the General breathing down his neck and the feeling of his lean hands on Cloud's were invading his mind with every step. He just needed to get back to the bunker and see who else was clean, and then go off somewhere private for a while. Long enough to clear his head at least.


	17. They Don't Make it Easy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There's a lot of fallout from the bust, and Reno's pushes Cloud's patience.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you've read Green Dreams on Fanfiction(dot)net then you may notice that this chapter has been almost entirely rewritten of 12/10/13. I really didn't like what I'd done with it before, so large chunks that did nothing for the plot or character development have been completely cut out, certain character descriptions were changed around a bit, and entire scenes have shifted tone or setting. This doesn't affect the arc of the story or anything really; it was mostly just correcting bad writing and pointless filler.

Conditioning on Tuesday was vicious. For once though, it wasn't because of the instructors. Monday's drug bust had made Cloud's bunker—all remaining five of them—the pariahs of their cadet group, and the bullying had started not long after they'd returned from interrogation three members down and a lot of others in trouble.

No public announcement had been made yet, but everyone already knew the gist of what happened. Three boys from Cloud's bunker and four from various other bunkers had been implemented in the possession, sale, and use of mako-laced performance-enhancing drugs. All were summarily told to pack their bags and leave before the morning wake-up call.

The boys of Cloud's bunker were hit the hardest and had been blamed for ratting out everyone else. The three other bunkers from their recruitment season, who they shared the barrack's floor with, had all had blood tests done, and more than one boy from the other bunkers had failed those drug tests. But the only ones who had admitted to smuggling and/or selling the drugs were actually kicked out. Users who tested positive got their privileges, like leaving the compound on weekends, taken away indefinitely, guard duty shifts for the remainder of their time as cadets, and had to take a required course every evening for two weeks about the drugs they'd used. It had not ended well for anyone.

Dan turned away from the sneering faces of the boys near the water cooler; reluctantly rationing what water he had in his bottle for the rest of the morning. He didn't want to approach the cooler and risk getting shoved or knocked down or hearing insults. Cloud and Reno were less intimidated, but neither of them went over there either.

The other two members of their bunker, Acker and Neal, loitered nearby, also avoiding the water cooler. They'd both tested positive, but apparently hadn't even known the drugs they were buying were stored a couple feet away from where they slept. Others who had likewise tested positive were also not far away. The rest of the cadets had ostracized them too—no one wanted to be associated with any of them.

"Break's up! Back on the field in lines!" One of the instructors yelled into a megaphone, and the boys dutifully put down the water bottles and jogged out to a stretch of dirt. Dan mournfully left Cloud and Reno, who were nearby each other alphabetically, and went over to the Gs. The boy next to him and behind him both shot him angry looks.

"Durkin was our friend you know," one said panting in between jumping jacks. Dan swallowed hard, hearing the implicit threat.

When they dropped to the ground to do push-ups the cadet behind Dan lurched forward and grabbed his ankles, dragging Dan backwards into the dirt, coughing and spitting around the dust. Both boys laughed cruelly, and Dan set his jaw so he wouldn't make a bigger target of himself if he complained or tried to get back at them. It was hard though, so hard when bore the brunt of the teasing and bullying for the bunker. Everyone seemed to know that he had been one of the ones storing drugs in the bunker, and that he'd spilled the beans on who gave them to him.

He'd tested negative though, and had totally broken down in that interrogation room, admitting that he'd only accepted them because he wanted people to like him—his obvious remorse and clean test was probably the only reason he hadn't left last night. Thankfully no one knew those details; Dan wasn't sure he could overcome of the embarrassment of having it known that he'd nearly wet his pants and started crying two minutes into the interview. He'd ultimately gotten off light, with privileges taken away and guard duty on the graveyard shift, which is perhaps what made him such a target.

Everyone stood up again for quick steps in place, and thankfully no one had the breath to call him names or harass him. The instructors were, thankfully, unbiased when it came to torturing the cadets. When the field steps were complete and everyone lined up for suicide runs, Dan was quick to jog back over to Cloud. He didn't want to admit it, but the blond was something of a shield for Dan. People called him names, pushed and shoved him, and made lewd gestures at Dan, but not at Cloud. Or if they did the blond didn't react at all.

He was sweaty and red-faced like everyone else, though no one could say Cloud hadn't been getting better. Dan had seen him working out the mornings, and he almost never hung around the bunker anymore, always off at the gyms or the track. It was a remarkable change, and one Dan found particularly inspiring.

As Dan had gotten to know Cloud, he'd started to recognize the blond's moods too. While he was never exactly a ball of sunshine, Dan could tell the blond had been brooding since he'd come back from his interview, but what that was he wasn't sharing. Not that Dan really expected that of Cloud. It's not like the blond had ever confided in him before.

Someone muttered, "cock-sucker" just loud enough for the cadets to hear as everyone lined up for a second round of suicides, and Dan saw Reno's fist tighten warningly. The rest of the bunker wasn't as apathetic as Cloud was to all the harassment. There had been a scuffle just last night with Neal and Acker and three other cadets that had thankfully been broken up before anyone of authority saw. The last thing the bunker needed was punishment for unruly behavior on top of the pressure their peers were dealing out—they were already close enough to getting kicked out.

Dan was genuinely afraid of being discharged, and that was part of the reason he'd cried at the questioning—the other was the terrifying Second class SOLDIER who'd been at least twice his size growling questions at him. Dan had grown up hearing stories of one of his neighbor's uncles who had been dishonorably dismissed from the army. Whatever happened to him no one really ever said, but it was the acknowledged belief of the family that he'd ended up a bum on the streets. Juno had a number of misfits of that sort, older men and even some younger ones who came home jobless and almost literally barred from getting another. Dan couldn't imagine the dismay of his family if that had happened to him.

"You're up, Dan," Reno said, giving him a little push to get his mind back on the present. Cloud watched the cadet sprint off, only getting a couple steps in before someone elbowed him hard enough to make him stumble sideways. Reno looked like he was thinking about yelling something but thought better of it.

Cloud didn't have much remorse for the cadets getting bullied, though Dan deserved less than he got. Most kids in the bunker had never suffered this sort of peer cruelty, but the blond had the feeling he'd lived through many days like this: the constant teasing, jeering, and casual violence. Of course, his faulty memory for once was doing him a favor because he couldn't quite remember those incidents, but he was pretty confident he'd hated living though them the first time.

Where Cloud's memory failed him on his own personal history, time he shared with Zack was easier to call up, and a lot more cheerful than whatever else he could remember. He could recall Zack explaining at some point—somewhere cold? Cloud couldn't quite remember—exactly why Shinra was such a popular place to work despite its strange happenings and closed-door depravities. Breaking any links from Shinra was the equivalent of dropping out of the workforce forever. With Shinra's worldwide influence and the main source of jobs anywhere on the planet, people with bad reputations—like those drug-dealing kids—were going to be hard-pressed to find work that had any upward mobility.

It was part of the reason Cid had never gotten much of a job after the failure of the rocket launch. He was blamed for why it didn't go up and, though he never admitted it, had trouble supporting himself afterwards. Being the Captain of the town was wonderful, but living off of Shera's earnings wasn't.

"Heart pounding, boys! Heart pounding!" hollered one of the instructors as they finished up the short runs with a last hard sprint across the fields—last ones to make it had to set up the tires.

* * *

Cloud was dressed in sweatpants and a t-shirt, towel-drying his hair, making it stick up even more than usual. The bathrooms were mostly empty now because the other bunkers had pushed and shoved their way to the front of the line, claiming first shower rights because they hadn't cheated by using drugs. By the time Cloud got his shower the water was cold, but he hadn't minded it. He'd never had hot water for showers at his home outside Midgar. It had seemed too much trouble for a luxury he didn't care about.

"Jeez, if you're shaping your hair just to go to sleep then you've got some serious problems, Cloud," Reno whined from outside the steamy showers.

Cloud had been taking his time partly for the privacy that was so rare here—and he craved the solitude he no longer had—but also because he had the unwelcome task of trying to put off Reno. The drug bust hadn't dimmed the redhead's fervor at all, except it had switched his attention from the Shinra executives to an equally dangerous subject. Cloud had been able to avoid talking about it all day because of classes and bullying, but Reno had been patient and picked his moment.

When the blond finally left the showers Reno was waiting for him, his hair still wet too but in fresh clothes. "Come on, there's a back hallway where we can talk."

Cloud gave a passing thought to simply walking the other way, but it wasn't like he could avoid Reno forever. Not to mention parkour was one of the few new and enjoyable things Cloud had outside Zack. With Zack he had to be cautious, but with parkour he could just let go. He wouldn't give that up unless Reno really drove him to it.

Reno led him through several quiet corridors until he stopped a dead end with only a janitor's closet door. It looked as private as they could make it, short of leaving the building. "Okay, get over here. I let you skive on the execs Cloud, but this one we gotta do." Reno murmured in a low tone so they wouldn't be overheard, his face serious though his eyes were full of mischief. Cloud's skin prickled at the hushed words, already picking up on the cagey vibe of this conversation. If anyone walked by the mouth of the hallway this would look really suspicious.

"You know the Turks, right? Biggest fake department in the whole company?" Cloud nodded along warily, but also with dread. Reno really did play with fire with oiled hands if he wanted anything to do with the Turks. "Well let's say I met one of them thanks to idiot Barker and yesterday's fiasco. And he was a real asshole."

"Just get to the point, Reno," Cloud said flatly. The blond had so far only been humoring Reno's exaggerated attempts at playing spy, but there were at least a dozen warning bells go off in his mind. Cloud hadn't known Reno had been interrogated by the Turks—and what were the Turks doing questioning cadets anyway?

"Sheesh. Okay, okay, Tseng's one of those Turks, and he's got some famous guns. Thing is no one knows anything about them, and they're not ordinary guns. So just out o' curiosity, I want to find out what he's strapped with. What's the big secret, you know?"

Reno looked very casual about this proposed idea, and either he was hiding his real reasons, or he didn't understand the sheer insanity of what he was saying. For Cloud, he already knew what kind of guns Tseng used courtesy of both being shot by them and because Vincent really knew his guns; Cloud even knew what kind of bullets since he'd had to pry them out of his body before. However, he couldn't just tell Reno without bringing a host of other questions down on him. Likewise, breaking into Turk quarters or their office was a mistake you'd only make once because you'd be dead.

"Look, look," Reno said in a placating voice, reading Cloud's incredulous expression correctly. "I know it's kinda crazy, but you don't know what that guy did to me yesterday at the interrogation." The redhead actually did look a little freaked out, and Cloud really didn't want to know what Tseng had done to cause that. "I've heard things under the plate, and I've been listening for awhile now. And hey, if we find something else interesting in his rooms, then bonus, right?"

"No." Cloud was cutting Reno off right now, before he got any deeper into this. There was no way he was getting involved in some half-baked scheme to break into Tseng's quarters. Cloud hadn't liked messing with Tseng even after he'd started working for Neo-Shinra. The man was as quietly deadly as Vincent, but he didn't owe Cloud any loyalty or friendship. He owed Cloud even less now.

Cloud turned around before Reno could make another argument, but the redhead wasn't quite done yet. He grabbed Cloud's elbow, thankfully not surprising the blond or he'd have gotten that same elbow to the face. "Look, I'm not giving up on this just because you're wussin' out. I let the executives slide, but Tseng's a real dick and I can't let that lie. I'm not dropping this," he warned.

"There's no way you won't be caught," Cloud warned.

"He's not all-knowing, and he can't be everywhere. It's just about timing. I'll find out his routine, figure out what kind of security he's got, and we'll find the perfect time. This isn't my first go around you know."

"And so long as you pick insane targets, I'm out," Cloud answered. No matter how much he enjoyed practicing parkour with Reno, there were bigger things at stake. Attracting Tseng's attention was asking for too much.

* * *

By Thursday things weren't any better between Reno and Cloud, and that was on top of the flack everyone was still getting from the other bunkers. Cloud continued to act like Reno had never proposed infiltrating Tseng's rooms, wishing Reno would take his cues and drop it, but Reno was clearly stewing. He'd also been in and out of the bunker at night and sleeping during classes, which Cloud knew full well was so he could keep track of Tseng. More than once Reno had invited Cloud along, but there was no way he was getting involved with anything to do with the Turks.

Dan, who didn't want to be on the end of Reno's annoyance like he had in hand-to-hand combat on Wednesday, jumped to be Cloud's sparring partner in swordplay. Dan was an easier opponent than Reno, but considering how hard Reno had pushed Dan the day before Cloud couldn't really blame him. The redhead had been working out his aggression the only way he could, but Dan wasn't fast enough or skilled enough to deal with the unpredictable onslaught, and he'd been kicked in the solar plexus so hard he got the wind knocked out of him. Everyone was just glad he didn't puke, but now the even more embarrassed Dan was avoiding Reno at all costs.

Unfortunately that meant Reno didn't get so lucky with his partner today, and the redhead's swordplay left a lot to be desired. When Reno's partner knocked him flat on his back to humiliate him he was met with jeers and jibes that made his already red face turn darker.

One boy stepped out of line though, Maxwell Winkler as expected. He and Reno had a nasty history as it was, and he'd been pushing Reno all week. "How much you getting paid to get knocked down like that? Or you just used to laying on your back?"

The words had made both Cloud and Dan stop sparring and turn together. Reno had few sensitive topics, but Maxwell had just hit one with a hot poker.

"I don't take favors from anyone." Reno's words were laced with fire and he looked genuinely furious. Cloud knew Reno was ready to do this the way they did in the slums—violence and retribution: eye for an eye.

Cloud stepped closer to the enraged Reno, silently ready to hold him back from beating Maxwell to a pulp. The trouble the bunker would get into wasn't worth it, and short-term gratification didn't do any good in the long-term. There was a distinct difference between sparring and uncontrolled fighting, and Reno was obviously ready to cross that line. Before he could even make his move though, Maxwell was abruptly upended, landing square on his tailbone with a sharp, distinctly un-masculine yell.

Aaron Tamboia, a boy from the bunker at the end of the hall Cloud recognized, planted his foot on Maxwell's chest before he could get up. The mat Maxwell had been standing on had been kicked a couple of feet over, enough to knock the big teen to the steel floor. The downed cadet had a few choice curse words to share, clearly in a lot of pain. Aaron didn't seem to notice.

"If fighting dirty makes you better, then shouldn't we all take advantage of that?" His popped his hip out to the right and planted his hand there in a decidedly feminine stance. He voice was pitched a little higher than a man's, though he didn't have the stereotypical lisp of a homosexual everyone made fun of in the barracks. He looked down disdainfully at Maxwell, flicking a lock of dirty blond hair highlighted with streaks of purple faded to lavender. They were growing out, but no one was quite sure what Aaron had said to avoid dyeing his hair to cover the unnatural color—normally the military didn't allow that, though the cadet program was more lax than regulation army. Cloud was lucky his hair stuck up, because if it laid flat it probably would have been long enough to require cutting in the regular forces.

Maxell glowered at Aaron angrily from the floor, but the cadet just tsked at him before leaning down to twirl a lock of Maxwell's dark hair around his finger. "Greasy. You should really take better care of it. Look at the General's hair. Glorious." Maxwell flinched away.

Aaron was probably the most openly gay man in their recruitment year, and was given quite a bit of personal space for it. Most guys among the cadets felt horribly uncomfortable with someone who had no problem touching them more intimately than general acquaintances. Homosexuality wasn't illegal or generally looked down on, but for most men who joined the military it was a last-option kind of deal, and only for sexual gratification. It made Aaron a bit of an outcast, but he didn't seem to mind.

Aaron was a wiry guy with noticeably big ears and the dyed hair, but was otherwise unremarkable, and he'd never distinguished himself in class. Cloud honestly didn't think he'd ever spoken to him before or heard much about him. The only thing Cloud knew about him was that he was often teased and slurs were thrown around about him, but Aaron had developed his own sort of armor for dealing with it. He took great pleasure from making thug-size men back up from him, and often the best way to do that was to goose them or hit on them, which made many of the guys deeply uncomfortable.

Considering homosexuality, it was perhaps ironic that so many straight men were interested in SOLDIER. There were no female SOLDIERs after all—and not for lack of trying by the Science Department, Cloud knew vaguely—so that didn't leave a lot of choice when it came to working off aggression, especially in the higher ranks where mako levels became a concern. The idea that only weaker or more feminine men were homosexual was also perfectly ridiculous when it was First Class SOLDIERs who were engaged in these relationships. Still, none of that was exactly public information, and it hadn't permeated down to the cadets. Many still harkened to the older belief that more effeminate men who weren't "man" enough to dominate a relationship with a woman, thereby letting another man do it for them. It was why Aaron got such heat and why he made a point of picking on the biggest guys. Knocking them to the ground like he did Maxwell only served to break that image of a homosexual a little more each time.

And now Aaron was exacting a little revenge on the bully. Reno didn't look totally happy that his revenge had been snatched away from him, but Cloud felt better. Aaron didn't seem to be nearly as impulsive as Reno, and if he did get punished it wouldn't be on top of the stigma of the drug charges.

The blond was proven right; there were a couple more digs into the chest by Aaron's boot and a little more gloating over the down boy, and then it was over. Aaron even offered Maxwell a hand up, but it was ignored as Maxwell nursed his bruised pride. Aaron just shrugged before winking provocatively at Reno and walking back to his mat.

* * *

The antics of the week didn't end with Maxwell though. Early Friday morning, not long after midnight, Cloud was woken out of a nightmare by Reno, who was definitely far too awake for two a.m. "Come on, come on. I know where Tseng is tonight, so this is our lucky break, but we've got to go now."

He dragged an obstinate Cloud out of bed without shoes or proper clothes, without telling the blond how he knew this or what his plan was. Cloud fought it initially, but part of him was still caught in the nightmare: a memory of being moved from one end of the laboratory facility to another. The sickening rocking sensation as the whole cylinder was carted down corridors tinged in green had been very disorienting to wake from. His stomach still felt a little sick, and everyone else was asleep, so he and Reno made it all the way out of the cadet barracks and halfway to Shinra Headquarters before Cloud really dug his heels in.

He hadn't wanted to make a commotion right in front of three bunker doors, nor had he been properly awake enough to take full stock of the situation, but now he had to really stop this. "I'm not doing this Reno. Tseng is a Turk and you're severely underestimating him."

Reno snapped back at him, looking like he'd been gearing up for this confrontation since Tuesday. "Oh, so you know so much? When have you ever met a Turk? I've run into 'em before, and sure ones like Tseng are better trained, but I'm sure I can get in there."

Cloud summoned up the shreds of his patience that had been severely frayed throughout the week at Reno's bellicose tone. "And if the guns aren't there?"

"I doubt he takes them to a meeting on the first floor at two in the morning. They'll be there. And if they aren't, then we'll just find another time."

Cloud ground his teeth together at Reno's stubbornness. He really loathed people when they were this mulish about something as ridiculous as this. Zack was renowned for this, but at least his plans weren't going to screw them over for the rest of their lives. Zack got away with it on a much smaller level, but Reno, the real daredevil here, could be hurting more than just his ego or pride—if they were caught Reno might still get into the Turks, but Cloud would be forever on their radar, and that's assuming the Turks didn't shoot first at intruders.

He knew the smart thing to do would be to walk away, let Reno make a huge and dangerous mistake and get into trouble with the Turks. After all, he'd become one before, so maybe they'd appreciate his gutsiness. Then again… the look on Reno's face when he mentioned offhand Tseng's interrogation made Cloud pause.

"Look, you going with me or not? I do it alone and I'm way more likely to get caught. Come on, back me up, Cloud."

It was the right push. Cloud grabbed Reno by the back of his shirt and pulled them both behind one of the heating units outside the main building. Reno had barely started protesting before Cloud had elbowed him in the gut. The blond in charge now popped his head around the heater, checking out the area. There were some kind of exhaust fumes above them, and they were in a shadowed corner, hopefully invisible to any cameras fixed on the outside walls.

No one was coming or going. The cadet barracks' windows were all closed and this side of Shinra didn't have windows until the fourth story. If Reno made a loud exclamation someone might hear it, but by the time security got down here they'd be safely back in the barracks. It was better to make this quick though, rather than the risk of a run-in with a perimeter patrol.

Reno audibly groaned; one arm wrapped around his stomach, cursing Cloud for that one. Cloud wasn't in the mood to offer any sympathy, especially when Reno was being particularly irksome.

"Shut up. Tseng uses two different, custom guns depending on range, conditions, and the target. He uses a silver Taurus model 66 for longer range and larger targets. It's a .357 magnum with seven rounds in a traditional barrel. Stainless steel with a padded grip, handmade, and it has a special barrel and sight."

Reno's face went completely slack with shock, bruised stomach forgotten, as Cloud plowed on, heedless for just the suspended moment of the consequences. It got his blood pumping almost as much as ducking behind the desk to hide from the guard had those few weeks ago.

"For the closer range or faster targets he uses a Beretta Neos with INOX. It's automatic, made of Damascus steel and solid black with an extended barrel and a thermal sight that can spot targets maybe four hundred yards away. Got it? Good. Now let's go back."

Reno's head was totally blank, registering somewhere in it that Cloud was pushing him back to the barracks. The bomb that had just been dropped in Reno's lap had diffused instead of blown up like he thought. It had been a gamble from start to finish _and man, automatic!_

The amount of money and brilliance to make those alterations… the strength to take the recoil… the ability to aim something firing thirty bullets a second straight from one hand… _damn._

It took the redhead a good few minutes to put his thoughts into words and then out through his mouth. Reno surprised Cloud with his first coherent question, which wasn't the accusatory suspicion Cloud had expected. "Automatic? Beretta Neos _automatic_? Automatic's illegal _and_ that gun doesn't even come in automatic!"

"He can reload with a magazine or with individual bullets."

Reno didn't ask any more questions after that, his face seemed to be trapped in an expression somewhere between awe and cruel jealousy. Cloud had no idea how badly he wanted to get his hands on those. _Think of the clean action, the way you could reload_ two ways. _Fucking amazing._

They managed to make it all the way back into the lounge outside their bunker before Reno formulated another response. Cloud was dreading the inevitable question, but Reno surprised him again. "So… I think the plan worked out well."

Cloud snapped his head up to look at the redhead for real. Would Reno really let something that big go?

Reno looked perfectly self-satisfied with himself, hands linked behind his head in a relaxed pose. Like he'd just robbed the Shinra vaults and hadn't left a shred of evidence.

The chills that went up Cloud's spine were worse than if Reno had asked outright how he'd known about the guns. The implication that Reno had guessed Cloud already knew what kind of gun Tseng used didn't sit well with the blond at all. Reno gave him a knowing look, and Cloud's whole expression closed off. Reno would get nothing from him.

The redhead seemed to know this though, because he casually slouched back, hands still behind his head.

"At least I didn't have to boost you through the bathroom window." He smirked, and Cloud saw the smug look out of the corner of his eye.

_Can't trust a Turk, blue suit or not._

* * *

Friday morning dawned clear through Sephiroth's tall windows. He could see the sun majestically rising in the distance, plumes of golden, red, and orange light streamed across the desert in a race to Midgar. It was a beautiful view, but one he had long lost any interest in; the display was always the same.

His quiet moment of reflection ended with the swift, staccato beats of two boots heading down the hall towards his door. The familiar inhale and exhale of breathing followed shortly thereafter, along with the rhythm of the steps until the dull thuds stopped and there was only a breath, then the rustle of clothing, and finally the rap of knuckles against wood.

Zack didn't wait for a response, opening the door and walking onto Sephiroth's plush white carpet in the same boots he tromped through the fields in. The SOLDIER halted only a couple of steps in, and from the sounds of his movements he had no intention of taking off his boots.

Sephiroth might have sighed if he was ever inclined to, aware that Zack was going to drag him off somewhere and definitely not to work. The General didn't turn away from the windows in his dining room though, his back facing the doorway. Maybe Zack might leave him alone.

"Did you realize its Cloud's group going today?" There was no hello, no morning greeting whatsoever. Zack's breathy exclamation explained his abnormal heartbeat, just a tad faster than usual. He was excited. Sephiroth would be going to see the testing apparently, instead of dealing with the small mountain of paperwork already on his desk. He should have known.

"Seph?" The waver of concern in Zack's voice was perfectly clear in the stillness of the room. Sephiroth could not seem to make himself turn away as the sunrise washed over his kitchen and dining room, splashing against the white leather of his sofas in an image he had often watched and long memorized.

"He do one of those psychological tests again? Damnit." Zack' clothing rustled and there was the sound of shifting hair. He must have been running his hand through his hair. Zack had a more indirect dislike of Hojo, but it was nonetheless very powerful, particularly on Sephiroth's behalf. "Look, this'll be good for you. You can watch the cadets flounder and make fools of themselves, and a whole bunch of the guys are gonna have a betting pool. Let's get some breakfast with them there, it'll make you feel better." Zack took a couple more steps in, and Sephiroth noticed there was uncharacteristic amount of tentativeness in them.

Aware suddenly of how he might actually be frightening— _frightening_ —Zack, Sephiroth turned abruptly. Zack flinched a bit back, and Sephiroth belatedly realized he'd moved too fast.

_Inhuman beast._

"Let me don some more proper clothes." It would be a relief to get away and collect himself with others, he realized. He'd only mull on mindless philosophical questions if left alone. With a nod he gracefully put the tea mug in his hand down and headed back to his room to change. The delicate cup was a natural shade of green, handmade from Wutai, a personal favorite of his, and he was sure to be careful with it. He didn't let on how turbulent he felt then. The disparity between him and the other First Class SOLDIERs was rarely felt as poignantly as just then.

Zack watched him walk away with equanimity unmatched. Sephiroth wasn't prone to mood swings often, but sometimes they just happened. Zack had always struggled to find a way to snap him out of it. Sometimes group interaction worked, sometimes a good meal, other times just leaving him alone or a good spar helped, but occasionally he couldn't find anything to pick Sephiroth back up. It upset Zack on a deep level to see his friend like this, and he hated his helplessness.

The man was normally taciturn but witty, a paper-dry sense of humor always there in the background of his conversations. This gaping void had been more prominent in Wutai, and for obvious reasons to Zack, but those wounds had been licked and scarred over. It happened in war. But these occasional relapses were all the more reason for worry. Sephiroth was able to joke sometimes about the war, but other times… Was there a trigger? Did Sephiroth have nightmares? Or was it just Hojo's meddling?

Sephiroth stepped back into the living room, his sleek black work-shoes in one hand. He had swept his hair over one shoulder, wearing dark work pants and a loose white shirt. He ignored Zack, whose eyes roved over him carefully, obviously looking for signs of the corrupt scientist's experiments, and Sephiroth ignored him. He never liked being probed and stared at, whether as a specimen or hero. Zack meant well, but that didn't move his eyes away.

Sephiroth picked his mug up from the dining room table and returned it to the immaculate kitchen, washing it out in the skin and placing it steadily on the drying rack. It was the only dishware visible in the kitchen, the only sign someone even used this marbleized room.

They left moments later, Sephiroth locking the door behind him. Zack kept abreast of him to the elevator, chatting unhurriedly if mindlessly. The noise seemed to soothe Sephiroth on some level, though it wasn't outwardly visible. Zack knew there was little else he could do except to wait it out.

* * *

There were three pools on the Shinra grounds: a SOLDIER pool and two for the regulation army. The pools were indoors, the outdoor weather and temperature changes during the day too harsh for the upkeep outside. Or maybe Shinra was just too cheap. The SOLDIER pool was a ten-lane giant, with chemically altered water that didn't utilize chlorine to keep it clean, as the sensitivity of a SOLDIER was considerably more powerful than a human.

The regulation army pools were the normal size, older style ones with probably too much chlorine in the water. The cadets from Cloud's group were gathered there, huddled on the bleachers off to the side. The ugly orange bleachers were the brightest color in the room next to the glimmering blue water. The only reason it was so clean was because so few soldiers actually used it.

The General, three Firsts, and roughly ten Second Class SOLDIERs had adopted the top booth at the back of the pool for their gambling and viewing pleasure. Zack hadn't been able to bring Kunsel, who had meetings scheduled all morning, but that didn't stop the man's enthusiasm. Instead he brought another First Class, his favorite gambling buddy, Wade, and Wade's tag-team partner Drace. The box was specifically designed so the heat of the room and the overwhelming smell of chlorine didn't penetrate, letting the SOLDIERs relax in peace.

Inside it was a tumble of sound from the Seconds', Zack, and the other two Firsts' shouting voices as the betting pool opened up. The furniture was older, the cushions worn on the scattering of seats and the paint peeling in the corners. It even had the strange mixture of dust and cleaner smells that was unique to some of the older, less lived-in buildings.

Sephiroth would have wrinkled his nose at the smell, but he managed not to as he was hailed and greeted upon his entrance. Zack made a comment about air quality, but other than that the door was left open to let a little air through. The men were fairly easy around their General, if a little more subdued in their betting than they might usually have been. Wade threw the General a side-glance and then shared one with Drace, both no doubt aware of the odd mood he was in, but didn't ask about it. The Seconds didn't seem to notice or respond to it.

The Third Class SOLDIERs below were having a harder time than their superiors. Chlorine was a powerful chemical and had a very distinctive smell. Normal humans often felt uncomfortable if there was too much in the air, let alone a more sensitive SOLDIER's nose. The ones monitoring these tests were rotating for a step outside to clear their senses.

The General looked down on the hubbub of the pool area distantly, watching with detachment. He couldn't bring himself to do more, his mind sluggish. It was an unpleasant feeling, but he couldn't seem to drag himself out of it, a side effect of Hojo's typical tests and psychological prodding. There was nothing the professor liked more than seeing what made his best experiments tick.

This pool was smaller than the ten-lane SOLDIER pool and only twenty-five meters long with six lanes. The grey tiles surrounding it were slick with water and the starting blocks at the far end were long worn down and a mellow shade of white. Behind Sephiroth, his SOLDIERs had taken down the hair colors and visible attributes of the cadets down by the pool and were starting a betting pool for the four rounds of swimmers. Zack was of course in the thick of it.

The coffee table in the center had been cleared to record bets, so the food was left in a pile on the desk in the far corner. Zack had brought some water over for the General, but Sephiroth had otherwise declined. He was not overly fond of the greasy food the SOLDIERs indulged themselves in. His palate was a little sensitive to that.

To the left of the pool was a row of bleachers with about forty cadets seated on them, two recruitment dates roughly. Strife's mop of blond hair was clearly visible next to a redhead. They were on the topmost bench in Shinra-issue swimming trunks and t-shirts. Sephiroth was just able to make out their expressions, the blond's calm and the other's a little nervous.

Zack stepped up next to him. "Cloud look okay?" Sephiroth glanced back over at the boy. One of the Thirds had planted himself on the slick walkway before the cadets, explaining the rules of the test. Sephiroth noted the Third's uneven breathing, like he was holding his breath for as long as possible. He was probably next on rotation outside.

"He should be fine."

"Good, I'm betting on him." Zack turned away after a minute. Sephiroth continued to look down at the pool distantly; only dimly aware of what was happening both in the box and outside it.

The test was a simple but necessary one. SOLDIERs needed to be able to swim, and this was the way for Shinra to decide who needed the extra course on swimming and who didn't. It had become more than just a trial though when SOLDIERs starting betting on outcomes, and soon the cadets had taken to the competition and the pressure not to be made a fool of.

In the peripheral of the room, partially behind a set of bleachers, was the familiar shade of blue of the Turk suit. From the angle Sephiroth was at he could just make out the black hair pulled back in Tseng's traditional style. The Turk was obviously here for recruiting purposes, just as he was here to observe. Tseng and he had a fairly simple relationship in most people's eyes. They stayed out of each other's ways, Turks and SOLDIERs stayed away as well, and that was as much as the President and his executive board cared to know.

In fact, the General and Tseng had fairly common taste in a number of things. The way their departments were run in Shinra was the one they connected on most frequently—though Tseng was technically second in command, though he often organized foreign missions for the Turks. Both ran military factions of the whole, so they had the same respect for hierarchy and similar opinions on punishments and measures to be carried out. It made it easier to deal with someone in a similar position of authority who dealt along similar lines as him.

They're similar tastes extended beyond the work realm. He and Tseng had a real respect for good, cultivated Wutain food. Many an issue between their departments had been solved over a quiet dinner. What they were also most known for having in common was only speculated outside their hearing: their preferences in bed. Sephiroth restricted any encounters of that nature to SOLDIER Firsts, and even then it was infrequent. Tseng was perhaps a little more promiscuous, but perhaps not. Rumors were always exaggerated as Sephiroth had learned.

Zack nudged him as he and other SOLDIERs grouped by the glass. Various comments, some lewd and some appreciative, were made as the cadets stripped off their shirts and were directed before the eight starting blocks in short lines of three or four people. Zack commented on Strife's physique, how already the extra lessons were paying off. Sephiroth squished the odd feeling in the back of his mind.

Down on the deck Sephiroth could see Cloud Strife second in line in lane four. Zack pointed him out loudly as the other SOLDIERs looked on curiously. Zack's interest was well known to the SOLDIERs in Midgar—after all, it was a rare thing for a First to train someone one-on-one, especially a trainee. Despite the number of jokes concerning the legal age of consent, the other SOLDIERs took careful note of the blond, aware that Zack didn't choose people just out of pity, but also out of skill. No matter how much Zack liked a good brag, he usually backed it up well and people were curious.

As was the General.

Strife had been an on and off thought for him up until the interrogation. At that quick meeting, Strife managed to become a real bother in his mind. Now, looking down on the small boy, Sephiroth let him occupy his thoughts rather than push the disturbance away as he normally would have done—he needed the distraction. Hojo's tests and invasive questions last night had left him empty and exhausted but unable to sleep. He had stood, frozen in his dining room, still in his clothes from last night, contemplating human selfishness, greed, and need for constants through the night, and even in this room full of people the lingering shade of that void of emotion stayed with him.

The boy had been underestimated and overlooked from the start. The General hadn't even noticed him or given him a spare thought until Zack brought the kid right under his nose, and even then he'd waved off that defiance as teenage recklessness and rebellion, if stupid bravery. Sephiroth was perfectly aware of how intimidating he was to people. Then there'd been those brief run-ins, hardly a few words spoken and more said in body language than Sephiroth could ever hope to interpret. Strife was cordial but stiff, and not with the hint of embarrassment or awe so cultivated in the rest of the populace. His tension had been palpable but for some reason unexplainable. Sephiroth had looked that cadet in the eye and not seen the Cloud Strife that should have been there. But just who had he seen? Or what?

The first shot of the gun from the pool rang loudly through the vaulted ceiling. Several of the cadets flinched before diving in, with two belly-flopping almost immediately and another almost falling off the block into the water. SOLDIERs were laughing and egging on their chosen bets like racehorses while the Thirds down below looked on with barely smug smiles. This test was always a riot for SOLDIER.

Sephiroth hardly watched them though, his eyes focused on the blond cadet standing quietly behind the block next in line, a contrast to the shifting and fidgeting cadets all around him.

The interrogation had been the most surprising and enlightening meeting of course. Kunsel hadn't pulled exactly what Sephiroth was looking for—not that the General really even knew what that was—but he'd drawn a number of disquieting and introspective ideas thanks to what hadn't been said at that interview. Strife was far more than Sephiroth could see, and the silver-haired man had been pleased inside: the blond would have been boring otherwise.

At the end of the first lap it was obvious who could swim and who couldn't. Three boys floundered, helpless in the ten-foot deep end of the pool, already grappling for the walls so their heads didn't go under. Sephiroth could sense the barely repressed disgust or amusement in some of the SOLDIERs. He himself felt neither one way nor the other. Those that couldn't swim would be taught. If they were on unequal footing they would have to make up for it some other way.

After Kunsel's part in the interrogation, Sephiroth had made his own move, and he still wasn't sure if he handled it well. He wondered if he hadn't been forceful enough or if he'd been too hard, if he hadn't asked the right questions or if he'd even had any control over the outcome. It felt strange to doubt himself like that, but Strife's puzzle was a dangerous and delicate thing to be handled, and a mistake in one direction meant re-tracking another five. Zack had dealt enough with that to prove to Sephiroth the need for tact. It was strange to be the one dealing with it instead of being the cause, as Sephiroth knew he often was.

The first round of boys who could swim made it back to the starting blocks and were hauled on to the deck by the next in line. Strife, as Sephiroth noticed, offered the boy before him a hand up, though he spoke no words. He mounted the block a moment later.

Zack was bouncing on the balls of his feet, muttering under his breath encouragement and luck to Cloud.

The gunshot fired and Cloud dove. It was a relatively clean dive, and he started off well. Zack's voice rose in crescendo as Cloud swam easily down the lane, outstripping his red-haired neighbor easily. He was second to another boy in the first lane, but Sephiroth didn't particularly care. Strife's ability in the water wasn't overly impressive normally, but the General was aware Strife came from Nibelheim, a place too cold for any swimming water and with a lake frozen over most of the year. With the residents of the village traveling so little, Cloud's fluidity in the water made him wonder.

Zack didn't seem to notice or care for the moment. Cloud was too far behind the other boy to win, but that didn't stop Zack from cheering him on. Money was already switching hands behind him.

As Cloud pulled in to the block and came out of the water, Sephiroth's eyes were drawn to his smooth, unblemished back. He had broad shoulders for one of his stature, with a clear line down his spine edged by muscle. His blond hair didn't quite fall to cover the back of his neck and if Sephiroth trained his eyes he could see how the water slid between his shoulder blades down into the band of his swimming trunks.

Sephiroth caught Zack's elbow before it could connect with his side. The General's eyes lingered a moment longer on the small of Cloud's back were the hint of two dimples were before pulling away to meet his Lieutenant General. Zack was watching him with some guarded emotion in his eyes. Sephiroth could almost feel Zack glancing between him and Cloud, though the SOLDIER's never strayed from his own.

After a couple of seconds, Zack turned away to dig in his back pocket for his wallet. After paying up for losing the bet, he turned back to Sephiroth, this time a smirk on his face. "Well?"

The General answered immediately, not letting his real thoughts be spoken or even hinted at. "Adequate. The ratio of those able to swim and those unable remains the same so far." Sephiroth turned away intending to head out of the box. He had seen half the showing and had work to do. The records would be on his desk by this afternoon so there was no need for him to stay.

"What about Cloud?"

Zack seemed amused as Sephiroth turned slightly to look at him. Several of the more attentive SOLDIERs turned to look at him too. Cloud Strife's name had already passed a number of lips courtesy of Zack, and Sephiroth minute interest in him had turned some heads. Sephiroth dismissed them without even looking. "Your sessions will not be interrupted as it is abundantly obvious Strife does not need the classes."

Zack nodded, but he still had a mischievous glimmer in his eyes. Sephiroth turned away before he could consider it too much. Strife would make an excellent SOLDIER, of that he was sure. It was only a matter of practice and good survival skills at this point. Zack should already know what he thought of the matter, so why did he ask?

Sephiroth knew what Zack was getting at, and he resolutely turned his mind away from it. The traitorous voice in his head flashed his phantom lover before his eyes, the vague outline of a smaller man with shocking blue eyes, and then overlaid that face with a younger cadet's. The bright blue eyes turning to stare at him in front of the candy machine, the ones turned to the one-way wall of the interrogation room, the orbs that glanced over their bare back at the booth where Sephiroth was staring at the door blankly.


	18. A Fist to the Face (or Ten)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> People are starting to get suspicious, and the cadets don't like what Cloud's been up to.

Zack held the door open for Kunsel as they stepped into Sephiroth's office without knocking. Zack was shaking his head at the Second, clearly in disagreement with whatever the other had said. Sephiroth, seated behind his desk watched them for a moment, contemplating on commenting about their lack of propriety to even knock when entering another's office, especially their direct superior. With Zack it usually wasn't worth the effort. Sephiroth watched as Zack took his customary seat, motioning to Kunsel to do so as well, even as he lifted his feet up to put on his desk before pausing. Zack scowled good-naturally at the strategically moved paper filer. The General hid a smile of amusement at Zack's predicament. He took great pleasure at thwarting him when he could.

Zack, his lips twitching upwards, carefully toed the filer back a couple paces. Sephiroth's elbow conveniently rested in the path, and the filer was still too close to the edge of the table for Zack to put his feet up. There was a momentary standoff before Zack grudgingly put his feet down. Only then did Sephiroth glance away.

Making sure Sephiroth was watching, Zack shifted in his chair to put a booted foot on it, dirtying the pristine material. The General's face didn't move an inch, but Kunsel's stifled snort was barely muffled.

"So, Seph," Zack drawled, "how's planning for the SOLDIER Exam going?" Zack's waggled eyebrows and the way he eyed the papers on Sephiroth's desk cued the General in immediately. His Lieutenant General wanted to know all the details as he had in years past, but this year Zack was privately training a cadet. It had only happened a handful of times before—including with Zack when he was a cadet—for a high-ranking SOLDIER to take a cadet under his wing. Even though Sephiroth trusted Zack to hold his silence, he could hardly condone it by anyone's standards. As General he toed the line when needed but when he didn't have to, he wouldn't.

Kunsel was still standing, having ignored Zack's insistence he sit. He hadn't saluted though, but was leaning against the second chair. He spoke before Sephiroth could reply. "It's not as though your blond's gonna need more help. He's already beyond most cadets from what I've heard." Kunsel had a strange tone to his voice that Zack picked up on.

"You just need to see him in action to understand. It helps to, you know, talk to him properly." Zack sounded petulant as he spoke, and Sephiroth knew Zack was still touchy about Cloud.

Sephiroth thought for a moment Kunsel would roll his eyes _._ "I've already seen enough action with him, I think. You don't wonder about that jump in skill? Even the General asked me to look into it."

Sephiroth put his hands together on his desk and leaned back a bit in the chair. It wasn't uncommon for Zack to end up in conversations in Sephiroth's office that didn't directly involve the General. Sephiroth got a lot of insight into other perspectives this way, and Zack's personality tended to relax those who would be less forthcoming when speaking to him alone.

"Motivation most likely. What else could it be?" Zack was dismissive of the topic. He and Zack had worn that discussion to the ground and without any notable conclusion. Sephiroth knew, just by reading Zack's expression, that the younger man was ready to help Cloud no matter what the reason for the jump. Until Cloud slipped up or something happened, the two let it be. Sephiroth privately thought Angeal's death might have something to do with Zack's incessant defense, but he didn't comment on it. That moment in history was not something to be brought up lightly.

The General could tell Kunsel disagreed though. The Second Class SOLDIER was clearly trying to persuade Zack to be a bit more suspicious of it. Kunsel and Zack were close, but Sephiroth wondered if Kunsel had ever been on the receiving end of Zack's bite. His Lieutenant General was a mother Rottweiler when he wanted to be.

Sephiroth cleared his throat to get their attention. "I would be interested to know your opinion of Cadet Strife, Kunsel." Sephiroth made sure to keep his phrasing and body language open. He knew they both could be quite volatile, and he'd played mediator to others before.

Kunsel didn't hesitate. "There's something weird about him." Zack looked like he wanted to comment but Sephiroth lifted his hand.

"How so?" His voice was quiet as he addressed Kunsel.

The man looked straight at him even as he spoke carefully. "There's more to him that we don't know. I thought he might be something like those child soldiers and orphans who fall into gangs, but obviously he's not from anywhere like that. I just wonder why he wants to be so good," Kunsel said, going for casual and missing the mark.

"Because of SOLDIER," Zack said immediately. "It's his dream, like a lot of kids here, except he's going after it with more ambition than others. We should _encourage_ this sort of thing, not get all suspicious over it."

Sephiroth didn't comment on that, though the switch in focus was a little annoying. Trust Zack to jump to Strife's defense. The General still wanted to know from where Kunsel was drawing his conclusions. He knew of Kunsel's experience and its value, and the man had personally seen a side of Strife no one had even known about. He wondered vaguely how aware the blond was of it.

"Look, not everyone is a good guy, and I'm just saying Cloud might fall the wrong way." Kunsel was frowning now too at his old friend. This was an obvious point of divergence for them. Sephiroth wondered at why here was where they really seemed to disagree. Was Kunsel worried Strife was threatening his relationship with Zack? Kunsel and Zack hadn't seen each other in almost a year, and even then Sephiroth knew they were little more than friends that dallied on the line like many SOLDIERs. Was Kunsel invested more than even Zack was aware?

"Cloud won't. We're friends, and he'll talk to me before he does anything serious-"

"But he won't tell you who trained him." Kunsel's voice rose a bit, and it was clear he was getting a little caught up in the conversation. Zack was tense in his seat, and Sephiroth noticed how his hands gripped the arms of the chair. Kunsel had also taken a more defensive stance. "You said it yourself; he knows more than he's letting on. He's hiding something, and until we know what, I don't want to put too much trust in him. You don't know what he's capable of."

Sephiroth was silent, watching this development carefully.

After a moment Zack's face split into a huge smile—though not all the tension was lost. "You worried I can't take a cadet?"

Kunsel seemed abruptly taken aback as he realized what he'd said, and he offered a self-depreciating smile as he laughed. "Not like that. You wouldn't die that easily. Have to be eaten by something and digested for a month before they'd really get you." Zack smiled at the teasing before playfully reaching over and punching Kunsel.

"Then what? Cloud Strife, 5'4 and a half, seventeen-year-old, blond—AKA, blood-thirsty assassin?" Zack sniggered, relaxing even more.

Kunsel couldn't help but laugh either, and Sephiroth's lips twitched before he could help himself. The mental image of Strife strapped to the teeth in armament stalking around some deserted alley was strangely absurd to Sephiroth. "No, no, I guess I'm just being paranoid. Don't want to lose my position or something to some upstart."

Sephiroth nodded to Kunsel at that last comment. As a Second Class and foreign-based, Kunsel had a precarious position at times that he had to deal with. He was on the brink of First Class, but there were already twenty-eight. Due to policy, mako limitations, and the General's preference of a small elite force, First Class SOLDIERs were a very rare breed. Until one of the First Class' died or "retired", Kunsel would remain a Second. Despite that, he had already turned down the promotion to First Class once before, not wanting the attention and added burden that came with the position. That sentiment was particularly well understood by Sephiroth.

"You won't be moved from your position until you ask for it." Sephiroth reminded him. Kunsel nodded, pleased. The General was wondering how to bring the conversation back to the Second's apparent unease with Cloud without drawing more fire from Zack, when said SOLDIER let out a particular loud snort, laughing to himself.

Kunsel turned to look at him quickly. Sephiroth noted how sensitive Kunsel got about his position. "What are you laughing at?"

Zack was sporting a cat-got-the-canary grin. "Now the only thing you have to fear, Kunsel, is Cloud taking Seph's spot." Kunsel smiled and barked out a laugh as Zack closed his eyes, no doubt envisioning Strife seated behind the General's desk.

The General was silent though, introspective. It hadn't ever occurred to him before he could lose his position. The General was obviously the strongest SOLDIER, and Zack still wasn't at his level even as his second-in-command, but what if one day someone did come along?

Kunsel and Zack continued to crack jokes about Strife in his uniform or attempting to wield a sword taller than he was, when the fax machine jumped to life suddenly, spewing out paper, and reminded them they had come in here for a reason. Sephiroth was brought out of his thoughts, but they lingered in the back of his mind, something to be ruminated on later.

"Seph," the General brought his focus back to Zack, "I was supposed to tell you the results for the second set of swim trials are finished. Secretary's got it." Zack got up and headed out with a wave as he spoke, followed by Kunsel who gave him a half-smile as he left.

Sephiroth sat back in his chair and tried to examine just what he thought of having an opponent really at his level, a true challenge.

_It would be a fight worth waiting for._

* * *

Reno woke up bleary eyed, not quite sure what he was looking at for a second. In the center of the room was Cloud doing one-handed pushups, though to the redhead it was more of fuzzy oblong shape that looked to be humping the floor. As Reno's eyes focused, he could see how Cloud had that effortless up and down movement that indicated a lot of practice and strength, not to mention balance. The blond's eyes were determinedly facing forward as he no doubt counted up to five hundred in his head, or some other ludicrous number. Sometimes Reno had trouble standing Cloud. The blond was doing amazing in class and being trained by a First Class SOLDIER. He had the ambition and suddenly the talent Reno was sure half the bunker secretly wanted. It made Reno jealous sometimes, but usually he felt more relief that Cloud was securely on his side.

The redhead turned over in bed, refraining from huffing like some girl. He couldn't lie and say Cloud was some prodigy who did amazing shit and didn't lift a hand to do it. He worked his ass off, and Reno knew being angry he couldn't do the same was just stupid.

He thought this more and more often as he watched Cloud get better and better, reminding Reno that the redhead wasn't exactly what SOLDIER was looking for, but that anything was better than living in garbage. Anything, even if it meant spending his free hours hitting dummies over and over again.

* * *

"Thank Gaia it's Saturday." Reno flopped down on the mat next to Cloud and slowly lolled his head over to look at the blond who was running though the last movements of their form. Cloud ignored the redhead completely as he ran through the kata once again, feeling the strain on his muscles. It had been a week since he and Reno had resolved the Turk question, and things had pretty much gone back to normal. They were even bothered a lot less by the other cadets, who were easing up on their bunker.

The redhead occasionally got the urge to go train and tried to join Cloud when he went off to practice, and Cloud wasn't sure if he appreciated Reno trying or just didn't want the company, because he had mixed feelings whenever Reno popped by. It usually ended up with the redhead collapsed somewhere just watching Cloud go at it for another hour or so. Dan had long since given up after he almost skewered himself on a practice sword when he nearly fell asleep leaning on it.

"How do you do it?" Reno had rolled on to his back and was staring up the ceiling, his face half bemused half curious now.

"Practice."

"I mean, why? You're already gonna get in SOLDIER, so what's the point?" From the corner of Cloud's eyes he could see Reno's sprawled out like a discarded doll, his hands dirty from the over-used handles of the practice swords.

Cloud decided after a moment it was better to be silent and let Reno think whatever came as the most obvious answer rather than lying straight to him. He knew how much he hated to be lied to, even if it was by himself. He'd tell him one day. Reno's loyalty wasn't easy to get, but it was solid, and with his connections and abilities, Reno would be a very useful ally.

Reno laid flat on his back quietly for another minute before Cloud finished up. The blond stuck to the straight army style kata when he practiced in the open rooms, aware that though Shinra was full of variety in fighting, cadets were only taught the basic army katas. Until SOLDIER, people didn't branch out and experiment with alternate fighting styles.

The blond put the practice sword away and watched Reno struggle to his feet, moving his limbs as if they had fifty-pound weights attached _._ The two left the army gymnasium, cutting down the hall from the gym and across the dirt courtyard behind Shinra Headquarters to the cadet side of the compound. The canteen was there, shaped like a square steel box dropped on to the dusty earth, utilitarian to the core. They headed inside, Reno not even bothering to wash his hands before picking up a tray and joining the line.

It was high time for lunch and the line was quite long and slow moving because today they had macaroni and cheese. This meant people doubled back for seconds, and it extended the line and slowed it down when people cut in or tried to get more on their plate than was given to them. Cloud's mind drifted back to the morning, ignoring how Reno shouted at some guy three or four paces in front of them who had just cut in; or Dan, who had managed to squeeze in behind Cloud a couple minutes ago.

Cloud had woken up like he'd been jerked awake, as if a string in his middle had yanked him into sitting up. This last dream was a little more vivid than recent ones, which was why he'd gone off to work himself to the bone as soon as he could. In the dream—no _memory_ —he'd been forced up off the operating table after just being stitched up to make room for another experiment; no anesthesia used because it didn't mix well with high levels of mako. It was a painful recollection of how little he'd been worth to Hojo, something Cloud didn't appreciate relieving. After thinking he might vomit and waiting for his vision to clear so he'd stop seeing the lab, Cloud had gotten out of bed and started to exercise. It had always been a good way to clear his mind—killing things worked better, but that wasn't an option at the moment.

The line moved slowly, and as the sordid details of the dream came back to him, Cloud began to balance on his toes, counting to twenty before relaxing his calves. By doing this at a steady rhythm he could effectively bury the images and sensations and focus back on the present.

The macaroni and cheese resembled plastic and tasted exceptionally artificial, but Reno was wolfing down his third helping greedily, and Dan was being a little less precise about how he ate than usual. Cloud watched them with only a mild sense of disgust. The dairy in his stomach didn't always settle well with him. In Nibelheim there was a distinct lack of cows or sheep, and any milk was usually from what few mountain goats wandered up to the higher elevations. As such, most kids were weaned off major dairy products early in life, and it still unsettled his stomach to have too much of it. He would never really grow out of that, he recalled, since Midgar wasn't flourishing with cows either.

It didn't surprise Cloud too much to know Reno could eat almost anything. The aptly named "street urchins" were capable of consuming just about anything: spoiled, rotten, moldy, old, thrown out, or half-eaten. They had to if they wanted to survive. As for Dan, he was straight out of Juno and they had a more mainstream diet. He was probably used to home-cooked macaroni and cheese. This, even a poorly done substitute, was still better than the usual gruel though.

When Reno shoved his tray away and patted his stomach contently, Cloud stood up. The room was already almost cleared out of cadets, and Cloud wanted to get back. He had some written homework to do but still wanted to take a run around the track. He could spend forty-five minutes on the homework and still make the track without cramping up _._

Dan gulped down the last of his water before standing up too. "What's the rush?"

"The track closes at ten."

Dan hardly looked fazed by this comment. He was used to Cloud filling up his day with practice and training. Reno, however, was a little more vocal. "You just spent all day training, don't think I didn't see you in the weight room this morning, Cloud!" The blond didn't even bother to glance at him. He knew that, but there were more important things than—"Why don't you and I head down under the plate and find something to do tomorrow? Or hit a bar tonight? You need another hobby."

The local dive bars and maybe even some under the plate were where most cadets were probably heading tonight. It was Saturday, and just a handful of weeks before the exams started. Already classes were prepping for the written exam, and people were feeling the heat. Cloud wasn't as nervous for that part as he was for the physical section. He was sure to pass it this time if Zack was right, but he wanted to finish the exams and move on. He had plans, things to finish, and he didn't want to think about how he'd failed last time.

Cloud marched out, ignoring Reno's annoyed grunt at being ignored. His mind was locked on finishing that battle strategy class homework quickly so he could get to the track.

The three left the cafeteria into the hallway and turned to the large metal door leading outside with an emergency lock system. The cadet buildings were so old many of the doors had dead bolts and key locks rather than electronic ones. Cloud had more faith in those locks than many of Shinra's more advanced security systems. He knew a dead bolt was better at keeping a monster out than any coded lock that could be hacked, or unlocked from another location. Enough of Hojo's beast had gotten out that way before for Cloud to know.

Distracted as he was by the thought of Hojo, Cloud didn't quite realize there was a crowd of cadets outside until their voices washed over him. Reno walked forward a bit to see what the commotion was, but Dan lingered back with Cloud. The blond didn't know what was going on, but neither did he care—at least until the group turned to look straight at him.

They were a crowd of cadets, most of them nameless to Cloud though he recognized them all from neighboring bunkers. They were gathered behind two buildings, with one opening at the end of the alley to the fields, the other to the barracks. They'd obviously chosen this position because it was relatively concealed with easy exits.

"Strife." Maxwell's face was tight and tinted a light shade of red. He looked angry and Cloud noticed the same expression was copied on a number of faces. Noticeably Acker from his own bunker was there amid. Cloud was sharply reminded of a riot when he noticed how the boys grouped themselves behind the leader, Maxwell, and took aggressive stances.

"Not good enough for with us Strife? Sucking up to SOLDIERs all day?" He spat on the ground and there was muttering behind him, agreements and exaggerations on what Maxwell had alluded to. It was obvious what this was, and Cloud had to consciously relax and not mimic their fighting stances. That would just provoke them.

Dan stepped away from the blond, and Cloud realized a moment later it wasn't to flank him—a little disconcerting because AVALANCHE had always been right there when Cloud needed them. The brown-haired boy had taken a more neutral stance between the parties, and Reno hovered with him, obviously waiting to see how this would break.

Cloud thought it was abundantly obvious though, even as he squashed the hurt over his lack of allies. A little liquor and some hyping up from the group, and they were bound to start railing against Shinra, the training regime, or anything that came to mind that offended their sensibilities. Cloud, unfortunately, hadn't quite realized until now how much he had alienated the others in his age group until now. He had dismissed them easily as shallow children and refused to interact with them, which probably wasn't smart in hindsight. He could take one of them or maybe two easily, but a group of ten or fifteen was a different game—and now he'd made an appearance they could jump on. Literally.

At least it would be unlikely they had weapons on them. Cadets didn't make much money, and the slums usually had overpriced stock. Still, a knife to the gut would put him in the hospital for weeks, and Cloud didn't doubt they'd kick him if he went down. Deciding diplomacy probably wouldn't work here, not with an angry group of teenagers, being a little more aggressive might get them to back off. Granted, their group significantly outnumbered him, but stalling for authority worked just as well. Dan might actually do the "cowardly" thing—though Cloud knew it was intelligent choice in this situation _—_ and get a superior before things got physical.

Acknowledging the leader was the first step to showing them he wasn't afraid. "Winkler." Cloud made eye contact and noted the way Maxwell's eyes were beadily focused on him. They stared each other down.

Maxwell's eyes flicked away first, and Cloud wasn't surprised. He was the hardened warrior here. The cadet's eyes glanced just to Cloud's forehead and then over his general attire to avoid eye contact before speaking up, "Whatever shit you're taking, whatever you're doing, I don't care." The people behind him shifted dangerously, a not-so-subtle reminder of their numbers, if nothing else. Cloud's eyes darted to them, taking into account the clenched fists, no weapons, counting their numbers (eleven), and noting who might be the most important to take down first. Maxwell was of course, top priority, as he was the major backbone of this mob.

Wonderful.

Cloud didn't know what to do, even as he settled his weight more evenly, discreetly preparing himself. He tried to grope for words but kept coming up blank. He could deny he took anything, but that wasn't the reason this crowd was here. Saying he just wanted to be a good SOLDIER or something along those lines would probably piss them off. In fact, anything he said would probably just make things worse. Silence wouldn't do any better than words, and he could hardly just turn around and take another route from the building to avoid them. They'd jump him no doubt, and even if he got away this would simmer below the surface. Better hope there was some way to clear the air before things got brutal. It was a stalemate until someone snapped.

Dan was poised on the balls of his feet, too caught up in the high tension of the moment to run. His hands were shaking slightly, and he was horribly afraid they would beat up Cloud or Cloud would beat them all up. Either way they would all be in _huge_ trouble because it was going to be a free-for-all either way, and everyone knew it but no one wanted to start it.

Reno, on Dan's side, was watching avidly too. He'd been in more brawls than he could count, and this one was as unfair as they came. Cloud against eleven brutish cadets who had fists and probably some liquor to beef them up. Dan was drawn so tight he might fly if he left now. Maxwell wasn't going to move before Cloud did and vice versa, and the ten behind Maxwell didn't have the guts to move first, so it was Dan and him who held the trigger. Reno's whole body was thrumming with energy, and he glanced at Dan out of the corner of his eye. The kid's hands were shaking, and his calves were pulled so tight they would cramp in minutes. His hair was practically standing on end, and he was already flush. He was going to snap right…

about…

now.

Dan bolted.

Cloud had hardly felt him whip by before Maxwell jumped forward. Cloud automatically dropped to a crouch but Maxwell went straight for the cheap shot. He kicked out aiming for the groin, but Cloud skidded to the side and ducked another punch. Watching Maxwell for the feint, he heard the wind through clothing moments too late. Someone's first smashed into the side of head, knocking him to the ground. Immediately two boys were kicking him, and Cloud curled up automatically and rolled on to his back. Like a shot he unfurled and landed on his feet, knocking one guy to the ground.

His other leg struck out to take down another, elbowing the guy that tried to put him in a headlock. He could hardly hear the jeering or the cursing of the group as he moved, keeping up constant motion to deter them and maintain fluidity, barely weaving around so many opponents. Maybe he'd never been in a fight this badly one-sided, or against so many opponents without a team behind him.

Dan had better run _fast_.

* * *

His breath was coming in pants, and he dared not turn around. He didn't want to see anyone getting mauled. Dan flew around the corner of the building and sprinted across the fields to the SOLDIER barracks, silently thanking the conditioning coaches for taking no slack at all. Just one SOLDIER would be enough, one person with a whistle or even just a regulation army guy, just someone.

* * *

Cloud took another shot at one cadet's kidney, hitting him before he'd registered it and dropping him like a sack. Another kick to someone's stomach shoved them several feet away, cleaning the area to his right, but the responding kick to his back from another cadet sent him flying forward into Maxwell's waiting punch.

The full force of that hit left Cloud dazed for a moment. He could feel a sharp pain in his nose and blood welling and dripping down his lips and chin. There was something ferocious in him as he ducked the next punch and swung out immediately with his leg, using his momentum to send a powerful kick at the attacker that was almost level with his neck. He wiped the blood away without a thought, as he evaded another punch and responded in kind.

Meanwhile, Reno watched helplessly as the fray turned into melee of swinging fists and feet. Cloud was barely visible in the circle, only just holding his own for now. A really nasty punch by Maxwell drew the first blood, along with the taunts and yelling to beat the crap out of the blond. It didn't matter to Reno that he was about to let himself be outnumbered one to five or that it was really the adrenaline talking. He wasn't thinking about the advantage of winning Cloud over more by helping him out or about how he'd prove his own strength by smashing the skulls in of nine other guys. He was thinking about Cloud getting his nose destroyed by a big bully outnumbering him in a fight.

Without another thought he launched himself right in.

Cloud noticed Reno immediately, specifically when he was thrown into Cloud and how they both hit the ground hard. Something jarred Cloud's side, but the blond forced the pain back after a moment, annoyed that it even took him that long. These were _cadets_. They were poorly trained, inexperienced boys looking for an easy win by ganging up on someone. Cloud could take them, he'd had worse odds before—Sephiroth had to count for a small army at the least. Reno certainly wasn't making this easy for them either if his next comment was any indication.

"Bring it bastards!" Reno charged from next to Cloud's right into a group of three guys, flailing and kicking. Cloud was fairly impressed as Reno took down two of them using his typical street-learned tricks. The blond stared for a moment too long and nearly got knocked down again when Maxwell tried to kick him in the back of his knee. He was able to regain his balance from his awkward dodge, using the stumbling momentum to turn and counter Maxwell's hit. He landed a nice hit on the side of the boy's face— _definitely a black eye later_ he thought vindictively—and decided Maxwell really needed to go down.

* * *

Dan was breathing hard as he made the final turn and the front of the SOLDIER apartments came into view. It was just the Thirds rooms, but even that was enough. As he stopped long enough to catch his breath he vaguely wondered what he was supposed to do now. Did he just go inside and shout for someone? Or should he knock? Or maybe he should go and find a SOLDIER not in the apartments?

Dan ended up knocking on the door when he realized it was a key-in and electronic lock. Still puffing a bit he hoped someone would answer, but after waiting a few moments there was nothing. He started to seriously wonder if Cloud was still okay when he thought he heard footsteps. Immediately he knocked again, louder this time, but still there was no response.

The bloodied image of Cloud rose up in mind with a grinning Maxwell kicking the battered and down cadet. Horrified at the thought, Dan shouted through the door but still nothing happened, and now he was wringing his hands and frantically looking around. He couldn't just break in, this was a SOLDIER barrack and the door was locked, but maybe there was someone outside?

Dan mumbled a hurried prayer to the Planet there was someone meandering around as he ran around the side of the building and to the back, but no one was in the fields out there. He wasted a moment waffling about where to go. Back to the apartments? Should he seriously run across the fields to where the Firsts stayed? The Seconds apartments were too far if he had to double back. What about the SOLDIER gym?

Deciding the Firsts were too scary, Dan turned back and ran to the private SOLDIER gymnasium. Twilight was descending and the gym was well lit and easy to find. It was also security locked like the apartments and Dan tried shouting again. No one answered though, so rather than waiting around he ran back over to the regular fitness area hoping to find an army officer. Just as he came around the corner of the apartments again, he noticed someone going inside.

"Wait!" Shouting and breathing unsteadily he ran over to the SOLDIER who was staring at him strangely. All the sprinting he'd been doing for training didn't seem to help a bit. He was completely out of breath and the stitch in his side was screaming every time he drew in a breath.

"There's… a fight… behind the c-canteen." The SOLDIER was just staring and Dan pointed back in the direction of the cadet barracks, praying to the Planet this guy would just take his word for it.

"Are you serious?" The Third looked skeptical as he took in Dan's red, sweaty face, the way he was leaning over his knees and slowly getting his breath back. "Kid, I don't have –"

Dan waved a hand at him, rudely cutting him off, trying to convey annoyance. What was this guy, stupid? Like he'd be sprinting all over the place for a joke? "Yeah. It's over there. Go, c'mon!"

The SOLDIER followed after a moment when Dan took off at a slower sprint. The stitch in his side was painful, and he had one hand rubbing it as he limped along. The SOLDIER was slightly behind him, and his footsteps were even and quieter than Dan's heavy breathing and clumping boots. They made it around the backside of Shinra Headquarters before the canteen could be seen. The back was only just visible and there were still a crowd of standing boys there. Dan was horrified to see a smudge of red on the ground and for a second he thought it might have been Reno's bleeding corpse.

The SOLDIER, realizing what was going on since he probably wasn't going cross-eyed from sprinting all over the compound, darted past Dan's slowing jog to the scene. He started to shout even before he'd reached them, but Dan couldn't make out the words. The boys immediately broke up though and four cadets tried to run when they realized they'd been caught. The SOLDIER collared two, jerking harder than might be necessary, before they could get away, and the others babbled the names of the two deserters with a little pressure.

Dan came up on the scene in horror. There were nine boys left in all, with Cloud and Reno off to the side. Reno was flat on his stomach with blood oozing from his mouth and his left ankle twisted strangely. His cheek lay against the dusty ground, and when Dan moved closer the redhead lifted a bruised wrist in greeting. "Hey ditcher. You missed the fun."

Reno's teeth were stained red and his top lip was split. Dan winced at his words. He would have helped, really, except well… everyone was going to be in huge trouble.

Cloud was sitting a little ways past Reno, his back against the wall of the cafeteria. He looked angry as he nursed a bleeding nose and a black eye. The blond's shirt was ripped on the left side, and the bottom left pants leg torn. Dan noticed the black look on his face as he glowered to himself. His hair was in complete disarray and dirty, and the toe of one boot had blood on it.

Dan could hear the SOLDIER talking angrily on a PHS to someone. He was kicking up dirt and pacing in front of the meekly standing line of cadets. He had all their names by now so there wasn't any point in running.

"We lost. Bad." Dan looked back down at Reno whose mood had darkened considerably as he turned his head to look at the dirty, bloody blond. "Cloud's pissed." Reno put his undamaged hand down on the ground and pushed half his body up until he could roll on to his back. The redhead still seemed to be holding in a tightly leashed fury, and he bared his red teeth menacingly, though at what Dan wasn't sure.

Reno's front was worse than his back. His bicep was cut twice on one arm and bleeding from the shallow cuts, the sleeve completely gone. Dan could tell it must have been a knife or even some kind of shiv, and he knew things would be a lot worse because of it _._ Both knees in his pants were torn and one was skinned bright pink.

The SOLDIER stepped towards Cloud first, no doubt because the blond looked in worse shape, and said something to him. Dan couldn't hear him over the voices of two other Thirds who had come over to help. The group of boys who had started the fight, Maxwell among them, was herded together and many of them didn't look too good themselves. Some of them were hurt but overall they were more bruised than anything else. Maxwell looked nastily vindictive, even while sporting a bleeding ear, black eye, and a cut on his cheek that Dan secretly hoped would get infected.

He turned his attention back to Cloud and the SOLDIER, more interested in his friends' prognosis than the damage they'd managed on the bullies. Cloud seemed to be refusing help but the SOLDIER was adamant. Sneaking a bit closer while trying to look like he wanted to talk to Reno, Dan listened in:

"I think it might be broken." The SOLDIER sounded very frustrated.

"It's fine." Cloud was his usual blank self. It was amazing he was still able to convey such frigidness even with a nasal voice from his bleeding nose.

"Look Strife, you're a mess and you need to get that rib looked at it. Even a hair-line fracture can be a real problem." The SOLDIER was exasperated and clearly not happy with Cloud's lack of cooperation. Cloud was being stubborn and obviously his injuries didn't allow the SOLDIER to really force him to do anything. Dan only hoped his friend wasn't downplaying the seriousness of his injuries.

"It's not fractured and I'm fine. Just need to get cleaned up." Cloud sounded disdainful, but he wasn't looking at the SOLDIER, just glaring at the sky. He was still holding his bleeding nose in one hand, tilting his head up to help the stem the blood flow all as he spoke.

"And disinfected. And an x-ray or two. Lieutenant General Fair will feed me to an ochu if you don't cooperate. You might have even broken your nose."

"It's not. Just bleeding." Cloud was glaring at him as the man nudged even closer and prodded at his side. After a couple more moments and poking, the SOLDIER made a quick call to medical on his PHS and moved back over to the group to talk to the Thirds were checking out Maxwell's group.

With precise movements, Cloud put both hands to his nose and with a quick jerk snapped it back into place. There was no sound, but Dan flinched hard at the action, just imagining what that must have felt like. Cloud's face didn't even twitch.

"What the hell are you looking at?" Reno's sour mood was only made worse when the SOLDIER shouted to the medical squad as they came running through the field, still a couple hundred yards away.

"He just… His nose…" Cloud ignored both of them, but Dan continued to stare. He'd broken a finger once and it had been _painful_. He'd cried at even the slightest movement. How could Cloud…

"Cloud's got some medical knowledge if you can't tell." Reno's sarcasm was as dry as the dust he was laying flat on his back on. Reno's eyes were unfocused and Dan wondered what he was thinking about. Did the slums have doctors? Or did Reno have to fix himself up before like Cloud had just done? Dan stared at Reno trying to imagine something so totally alien when it occurred to him that Cloud wasn't from the slums like that though. He came from a normal town.

"But where did he learn it?" Dan winced as Cloud prodded his own side, twitching only slightly when he touched his ribs. There was a calm familiarity in his movements; he knew what he was looking for. Dan could see what Reno meant.

"That's what I want to know." Dan looked down at Reno as the SOLDIER moved over to him. The redhead looked aggravated and in pain as the man analyzed his wounds.

"Your wrist is most likely sprained but that's a twisted ankle for sure." The SOLDIER probed at the back of Reno's hair carefully with two fingers. "No concussion same as Strife over there. He must have a hard head 'cause being thrown into a wall like this one is bound to do that." The SOLDIER muttered something more about unhelpful stubborn people and deserving to get licked a little before pronouncing Reno better off than Cloud but not by much. He'd still need a tetanus shot like the blond because of the shiv—which someone was in serious trouble for having.

"Medical is on the way, so don't even try to get up. Keep your arm and leg level." The SOLDIER then looked back up at Dan, who after a second straightened. "Watch them both for me. Make sure they don't leave until Medical gets here."

With that said, the SOLDIER dusted his hands off and headed over to the other boys. Seeing Cloud and Reno sitting or lying on the ground, both scowling and angry, Dan looked back over at the larger group.

In the end, Maxwell had been blamed for the start of the fight and for providing the liquor, so he was separated off to the side, as had the kid who had been holding the small knife—he hadn't been bright enough to even drop it. Two boys were standing by the adjacent wall, one favoring his foot and the other swaying a bit sluggishly. Dan had heard the SOLDIER mention the word medical again and assumed these two were the worst off. The Thirds escorted the others back to the barracks while Maxwell was no doubt getting a serious dressing down by the Third.

Before Dan could sneak closer to hear what was being said, Medical arrived. Four men in crisp uniforms headed over, black bags in their hands with the symbol for the Shinra Medical Squad. The SOLDIER turned away from Maxwell to direct them to Cloud first, then Reno, before he promptly marched off with Maxwell in tow.

Dan, watching the white-coated men troop over, missed the way Cloud stiffened. Reno didn't though, and the redhead noticed the reservation Cloud treated the doctors with. He was eventually convinced to lie down and woodenly complied, before being placed on a stretcher and carried away.

* * *

Reno rolled his head to the side to get a look at Cloud lying on the hospital bed next to him. The blond had turned out to be even worse off than the SOLDIER had thought. The doctor had gravely announced to the back of Cloud's head (he had turned to the wall when they first arrived, and Reno had a good idea why) that Cloud had a seriously bruised hip bone, fractured rib, and broken nose, but thankfully avoided a concussion. Although miraculously set right the swelling of his nose gave that one away. Last but not least, he'd gotten a black eye to be matched with another tomorrow because of said broken nose.

Oh, and totally popped that huge ego he'd grown. Reno wasn't even happy about it.

_Fuck you Cloud._

He didn't even know why he was so unhappy. He'd come out pretty badly, but he'd been worse off before, and it wasn't like Cloud hadn't been asking for it with his attitude these past weeks. And yeah, so Reno threw himself in, but he'd sort of expected to win. Cloud had been doing pretty damn fine before he joined in, but what the hell had all that training been for? Shit, Cloud was supposed to whoop ass, not get it handed to him by a pack of Shinra trainees! Cloud was being trained by a First Class SOLDIER, practiced every fucking day, woke up at godforsaken hours just to train more, and he still lost. The fuck was wrong with him?

Reno could feel the hot anger in his system burning through him. He couldn't believe Cloud had the audacity to lose. He raged a bit more inside and turned to glare at the offending cadet and say something when he saw Cloud's own fists clenched white on the sheets. They were so tight Reno could see all the veins and the folds of skin in his knuckles, and they were shaking he was fisting them so hard.

It stopped Reno's internal rant inside, because while he was beating up Cloud, so was the blond—and probably worse than he was. Reno hardly had time to consider his revelation though before his own diagnosis came back. The doctor announced he'd mildly sprained his ankle, sprained his wrist, had two shallow cuts on his bicep from the knife— _fucking Blitz—_ a skinned knee, split lip and bruising on basically every other part of him. He'd been free to go soon as they got the splints on for his ankle and wrist but Cloud would be here a bit longer for his ribs. Cloud didn't visibly react, and Reno wasn't sure what to think.

"Well… um, I'm glad you'll both recover," Dan murmured from where he'd followed the doctor into the ward.

Reno ignored the other cadet, mostly because the kid had run from the fight and that didn't sit well in his book. The redhead propped himself up in the hospital bed, irritated that it was actually more comfortable than his bunk in the cadet barracks. As if that wasn't pathetic enough. Cloud wasn't looking at either of them, just staring steadily at the wall. His lower torso was wrapped up to include his hip and he had more bindings around his ribs. He was obviously seething about losing the fight, and tensed up even more with all the doctors swarming around. Reno had difficulty resisting the urge to ask why Cloud was afraid of doctors, but he successfully squashed it. He wasn't going to draw attention to it somewhere so public when Cloud was likely to bite his head off.

Reno wasn't angry at Cloud anymore, not as he stared at the boy who looked so much younger wrapped like a mummy and trapped in a hospital bed, fists quivering from probably a mix of rage and fear. Now he was just angry at himself for letting Cloud's ability blind him. The blond was still a cadet and _fallible_ , that was what had eluded Reno. Cloud wasn't invincible, just a kid with no life outside training and a bare couple of weeks of steady improvement.

Yeah, and they were friends and Reno got his assed kicked for him, but like good friends, Reno knew saying anything about the fight or hospital until Cloud calmed down would probably land him here with the blond for the next week at least, even if Cloud couldn't actually get up from the bed. He could still throw things and even if had shit aim in practice Reno didn't doubt he'd manage to land a few hits where it counted.

Reno didn't get the chance to brood on it much longer as the door opened and a SOLDIER came in. Reno had never seen him before, but the redhead had the sense to not move from his hospital bed as Dan let out a small, undignified squeak. This guy was Second Class by uniform and was probably here to screw them over.

"Cadet Cloud Strife, Cadet Reno." There was a pointed moment of silence as Reno hastily saluted and Dan snapped a perfect one. When there was still continued quiet, Reno glanced over at Cloud, who had turned just enough to stare with a perfectly blank face at the SOLDIER. Or more like executioner.

The Second Class didn't make any remark, but his silence said enough. He almost seemed to hold Cloud in contempt, though Reno couldn't be sure why.

"At ease." Reno swore the SOLDIER gave Cloud a nasty look for not saluting, even if he was bedridden, "You are both to be punished accordingly for the fight you participated in this evening." The SOLDIER stood perfectly still with feet slightly spread apart, hands relaxed at his sides. He had rolled up his sleeves to reveal a hook tattoo on his lower arm and he certainly looked like a pirate with all that messy copper hair. Reno watched him warily as the SOLDIER took in their condition, eyeing Cloud in particular. The blond glared right back at him, unfazed.

"Cadet Strife," he almost drawled the words out, and Cloud's expression might have tightened a bit, though Reno couldn't be sure. Dan was standing at attention by Reno's bed, watching the proceedings. "Your punishment has been issued by your private instructor, Lieutenant General Zack Fair. Cadet Reno is to be included."

Cloud didn't look any different after that announcement, but Reno had to hold back a gusty sigh of relief. Fair would probably go easy on Cloud, and it meant Reno would get it easy too.

"You're to paint the outdoor, ranged weaponry shed upon your recovery. Lieutenant General Fair will be overseeing your work. If you fail to complete it properly or within the given parameters, you'll be given additional punishment." With another measured look, he turned to go.

Dan visibly gulped before speaking up before he could leave. "Sir, Mr. SOLDIER Second Class," he squinted for a moment to read the nameplate, "Stryker." Dan stumbled over the word, feeling it out as he said it. Reno was almost embarrassed for him, the wuss. "Could you tell us, sir, what will happen to the other boys?"

Stryker turned to give Dan a calculated look. Reno looked on as Dan fidgeted in place, his hands twisting the skin on his knuckles behind his back. Cloud was watching closely too. "They will be punished as befitting the crime."

A suitably vague answer, but Dan didn't ask for elaboration. His forehead was beaded with sweat, and he'd seemed to have pushed his barriers for the day. The SOLDIER glanced one more time at Cloud before leaving the ward without another word.

Reno exhaled quietly, aware that Cloud had turned his head away again, and Dan was still standing at attention like an idiot, like he'd forgotten he didn't have to anymore.

_Damn, but at least that guy isn't overseeing the sentence._


	19. Dichotomy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reno meets with Reeve again, and learns something Cloud has to share.

Reeve really needed a new spot to meet.

The roof of Shinra Headquarters may have been surveillance free, but it was also where the wind was the strongest. It towered above all the buildings on the plate by a good forty stories at least, but because its base started atop the plate, it was actually more like seventy-plus stories in total. Reeve was almost surprised the air wasn't thinner up there.

He knew from experience thaton the best of days the salty scent of the ocean could be carried from a distant breeze all the way to Midgar. The wind didn't whip the right direction tonight though, in fact, in didn't seem to have any one direction at all, other than seeping through Reeve's jacket. The air instead smelled reminiscent of seagull feces and the garbage dump that was the slums, officially known as Lower Midgar. He knew which direction the ocean laid, even turned to it hoping to wash out the smell of burning trash, but without a moon tonight the inky darkness beyond the city lights was all the same.

Reeve pulled his long blue overcoat closer to himself. The wind's fingers were like ice. The stars were out again tonight at least, the few visible ones twinkling dully down at him. Reeve craned his head back to look at them, wondering when the last time was he'd seen them all proper. Kalm? When had he last been to Kalm? And he wondered if Midgar would ever see the stars again, as he often did when he was up here.

He remained in that pensive state for a moment longer before the entrance to the roof creaked. The door eased open with the nightmarish screech as rusty metal ground against metal. It was Reno as expected, walking onto the roof with his usual swagger,although Reeve noticed he limped a 'd had various meetings like this for a short while now, and Reeve had grown accustomed to Reno's stubborn cockiness and attitude. The boy was a different kind of manipulative than Reeve had dealt with before. Reno had a whole different style to him that seemed sometimes childish, sometimes naïve, and sometimes downright dirty. Somehow it worked facts loose from people's lips in a way that was certainly unorthodox, nothing like the smooth or sly diplomatic charm Reeve was used to. He'd found himself susceptible to spilling or explaining more than he might usually. Maybe it was the mix of genuine naivety and a clever ability to hide it that opened people up, but whatever the case, it undeniably worked well. He certainly respected Reno for it, if nothing else.

As Reno came further into the light of the security lamp, Reeve was surprised to see him looking beaten up. He had a nice shiner on one eye that made him look ghoulish in the security lights. It looked to be a few days old, but still very visible.

"Hello Reno." Reeve decided to forgo mentioning the bruisingunless Reno himself brought it up it. Anyone on Shinra's payroll soon figured out that avoiding the larger issue was a time-honored skill to keeping one's job.

Reno just grunted before heavily sitting down on the ground. Reeve wondered if the boy's arse wasn't freezing, but Reno didn't seem to care for the moment.

Reeve, polite as ever, tried again. "May I assume the reason you missed our last appointment was because you were entertaining the hospital ward?"

"I've been through worse." Reno rubbed his fist against the still-healing split lip. He seemed miffed, the agitation was palpable,but he must have come up here for a reason.

"I don't doubt you have. Gang violence below the plate is a high as ever."

Reno visibly looked away, focusing rather on the billowing of Reeve's coat in another chill breeze. The redhead looked cold, but it would hurt his pride to accept Reeve's jacket. Reeve had never offered the jacket; he had sensed from the beginning Reno had a sticky pride he wouldn't let go of easily. So, Reeve watched as the other spoke and the failed attempt to casually put his red fingers into his pants pockets. "Well, you've heard how it is."

"Yes, but you've lived it. If this," Reeve gestured over to Reno's form, "happened below the plate, then you clearly aren't well-liked."

Reno shrugged, but he seemed to be regaining some of his normal attitude. Obviously talk of his old turf, something he knew he could lord over Reeve any day, made him more comfortable."This is from a bunch of dickhead cadets who got bored on Saturday. Down below, the only people who want me dead is Corneo. And he wants everyone not under his fat thumb dead." Reno muttered something else lost to the wind. Reeve smiled behind the upturned collar of his coat.

"Ah yes, Don Corneo. I have no proof of course, but Shinra and he are associated."

Reno didn't perk up at that like Reeve expected. The older man frowned. Maybe the redhead had already reached that conclusion.

Reno snorted. "There ain't no way Corneo could be where he is without Shinra backin' him up."

Well, even if Reno knew that already, Reeve knew Corneo was obviously a touchy subject now. He'd never come up before in their conversations, and looking back now that might have been deliberate even."I'm not sure how they back him, but he does keep the people under the plate subdued, does he not?"

"With whores." Reno's mumbling drifted off, but Reeve caught those two key words. _Whores huh?_ Reeve looked down at the seated Reno who had tugged the sleeves of his jacket together and buried his face in the arm of one. He looked young and angry. _Don't like whores do you, Reno? Strange for someone your age with your background._

"Well, Corneo seems to wield his power as well as the President does, if I do say so." That line was a bit risky, but Reno took it.

"Both fat asses too."

"Yes."

"Corneo's got his headman Heisa—the bastard—keeping his ring runnin'. Like the General. 'Cept Heisa seriously looks like he's got no nose when you see him sideline—musta been smashed in too many times." Reno shot the ground a dark but proud look. "I got a shot in too once."

_Headman Heisa…_

Reeve put that thought into a corner of his mind. He'd have to look at that one later. Now, before Reno clamped up, he better share something equal—that was how this little arrangement worked. Reno's distaste of Corneo needed to be complimented for the boy to speak up a little more loosely, but he knew Reno wanted information on the elusive Scarlet and Heidegger. Even though Reno had given Reeve some interesting stuff, it still wasn't worth what Scarlet and Heidegger might offer. Though Reno might pay up, he might not, and it might be safer now to use someone a little more…distant.

"Well, you're lucky you even get the shot. Many a man would like to take one at many people here."

Reno jumped right on the hitn as expected, smirking with a tinge of malice on his face. He no doubt was envisioning someone, perhaps the cause of his bruises and injured ankle. "Well, we all know Shinra doesn't give just anyone what they want."

"No indeed." Reno was going to have to fork it up or play this well to get what he wanted.

"If you've got a SOLDIER on steroids like the General, no one's gonna go against them." Reno's lips hinted downward, and he certainly looked letdown by the notion he'd never "get that shot", but Reeve knew it was a farce. Reno probably knew Reeve knew too. But it was so like him to play that card anyway, covering up for something else entirely. Sneaky and unorthodox, just as Reeve had thought.

"There's certainly a man the General would take a shot at first chance he got."

Reno shivered deeper into his knees. Reeve knew he was hiding a smile. "Ain't that one lucky man to actually rub the stone-cold General's fur the wrong way."

"Lucky indeed. And he has the ear and practically the arm of President Shinra."

"The General?"

"The President does defer often to the General,"— _and sweats like a cow when he's around_ —"But he'll oppose him for only one man."

"That insane scientist with the glasses." Reeve nodded to confirm it, glad Reno wasn't looking his way but rather out across the roof. Reeve was quite surprised Reno had caught on so fast, let alone known that much about the Professor. Yes, Hojo had a reputation that preceded him as much as the General's in some circles, but to know him physically? Reeve had seen the man on few occasions since the war, knowing that the scientist was prone to locking himself in his labs and not leaving for months at a time.

"You know, all the scary stories have mad scientists in them." Reno looked up at him and shifted his position slightly. He leaned forward on one knee now, one leg stretched out in front of him. The cold didn't seem to bother him anymore. Whether he was warming up to the conversation or it was simply the adeptness of Lower Midgar citizens that let them adjust quickly to new situations, Reeve didn't know.

"Yes, I'm aware."

"Betcha he's just like one of 'em."

"I am afraid the good Doctor might not have such nice intentions as say, Dr. Frankenstein."

"That monster was a doctor?"

"No, the monster in the story had no name. He was dubbed Frankenstein by readers because of his creator's name."

Reno was silent, staring at the ground. He only shifted slightly to move his hands in front of his knee. Then he glanced up at Reeve to make eye contact. "So who's Hojo's monster?"

It was a relatively well-known fact in SOLDIER and throughout the higher levels of Shinra that Sephiroth was the product of Professor Hojo's "creative genius". Though no one ever said where Sephiroth had been found, it was generally assumed Hojo had taken some poor child, probably an orphan on the streets not unlike Reno, and with a lot of mako, tinkering, and personal training from day one, the child had become General Sephiroth: the prodigal leader of SOLDIER and the powerful man he was today. Of course, that wasn't open knowledge on the streets, and something many people might be surprised by. Reeve knew a lot of the populace had either never given a thought as to where Sephiroth came from (his public profile said he was born in Midgar) or how he came to be so powerful.

Reno might have doubted or wondered about those things before, but this tidbit, something he would probably have learned later anyway, certainly would seem valuable to him. The redhead certainly seemed to take it as such. His eyes were still connected with Reeve's, and the executive was sure that last question had been rhetorical.

"There's that group, AVALANCHE under the plate," Reno said suddenly, and their eyes remained together, locked. "They've got their own Dr. Frankenstein with them apparently." Reno suddenly looked away to the doorway, then across the open expanse of the roof. Reeve wondered if Reno knew he was looking out at the sea. The boy had probably never seen it before.

"Doc's got a pet _Raven_ or two the Professor might like." Reno looked away from the ocean and back at Reeve. "The leader has a freaky tattoo on her back, and she's sick. Rumor is she's dying."

Reeve was deathly silent. That was a hell of a lot more than he'd given Reno, and he could feel some of that softness in him pleading to share something more with Reno, to even the odds. But he needed that last bit.

"There's someone inside Shinra leaking to AVALANCHE," Reeve murmured.

"No shit. And that doctor of theirs is a freak. He whipped out the nastiest cocktail of steroids so she'd live to fight the General. Heard that made her 'condition' worse in the long run."

"That fight was a draw I heard."

"Yeah, cause she was a monster."

The word hung in the air awkwardly for a moment. Reeve could feel his conscience pulling at him to say something. "General Sephiroth apparently had no desire to kill her." Goodness he was getting soft. Now he was defending a man he had implied was a bastard creation of science just moments ago. He needed to get back on topic and give something back to Reno for that new intelligence Reeve was fairly sure even the Turks might not know.

 _Ah, the Turks…_ "The Turks, especially the leader, are under suspicion." Reno sat up and Reeve paced a bit, uncomfortable with giving out something as close to the chest as this, but Reno had practically handed him information on AVALANCHE no one else might know, and it was only fair.

"AVALANCHE's attacks are a little too close to home, a little too well-coordinated for President Shinra's comfort." Reeve spun on his heel and continued to pace back and forth. His arms were around his torso to keep warm, but he couldn't feel the cold anymore. He felt like he could more directly do something with what Reno told him than he ever had before, and he had to return the favor. "They're sending out SOLDIER Firsts apparently to knock out some of AVALANCHE's hotspots and people. They don't leave until later this week." Reeve exhaled and stopped pacing in front of Reno. "It means the Turks are stuck here on duty while the Firsts go out and play. Seems the General's stuck too since that 'draw'. Apparently no one's happy he didn't kill her when he had the chance."

Reno's face had taken on the slightest hint of a grin that he couldn't hide as it grew.

They both just stared at each other a moment, acknowledging that a lot of sensitive information had just been passed, before Reno stood up and headed towards the stairwell. He paused before the door to turn back. "Since we're all buddy-buddy for a sec, let me ask you something upfront: I thought you'd be all for the end of Shinra."

Reeve sighed and looked down at the ground a moment before glancing back up at Reno. He felt he should be more cautious, but he hadn't been able to say these words aloud, well, at least not to something that might respond back. He couldn't find the will to care for the moment."Some of the Seconds sent after them were mauled by unknown creatures, summons it was said." Definitely those Ravens, whatever they were, Reeve knew now. "That kind of violence… no one wants that for a replacement. At least at the moment there's equilibrium."

Reno nodded faintly in the starlight. He was mulling it over from the look of it, so Reeve thought he ought to ask a question too. "I would have thought _you_ would at least silently support AVALANCHE."

That had befuddled Reeve when the topic of the terrorist group came up in previous conversations. Reno had always leaned a bit away from their side, which made Reeve wonder why, and whether perhaps AVALANCHE's image of "freedom fighters" and not terrorists to the slums people wasn't as right as many in Shinra had silently guessed.

Reno leaned against the doorframe, trying to look cocky even as he carefully kept the weight off his ankle. "Shinra can fall when I'm on the right side of it. And right now, I'm in the middle." With that he turned and headed down the stairs. Reeve stayed on the roof for a couple more minutes thinking it through, then wondering what exactly to do with the information he'd been told. He didn't doubt Reno's sincerity, not for a moment tonight.

Reno wasn't always perfectly reliable. His sarcasm got in the way, and undoubtedly he wasn't as used to compromise, if his normal involuntary question for a smoke was anything to go by. That had tapered off, in much the same way one weaned a child off begging for his mother, after several meetings.

Reeve wondered sometimes how much Reno was catching on. The boy had never been a pro at this, but he was certainly getting better at dealing the right cards with the kind of higher-class tongue-twisting that essentially made Shinra. He also had to wonder what he did with the information. Was he passing it along? If so, what Reeve had revealed tonight could be very detrimental to the SOLDIERs, but he wasn't inclined to think so. It was abundantly clear that Reno didn't think any more highly of AVALANCHE then Reeve did. Did he just hoard the information then? Or was there some other purpose?

The executive shook his head slightly to clear away those thoughts. AVALANCHE and these Ravens were his main concern for the moment. Perhaps a note slipped under the General's door?

* * *

Saturday. The blessed weekend. And what was Reno doing? Serving punishment. Like self-defense was some kind of crime in the military.

Reno scoffed as he and Cloudtrooped out to the field, heading towards the ranged weaponry shed. It was, of course, the farthest building in the fields from the canteen. He hadn't done any exercise all week since he'd been banned from practice classes—not that he could have participated anyway with his sprained ankle. After a weekend in the hospital and a week of sitting out, he was only marginally happy to be doing something. He'd tried to visit Cloud in the hospital shamelessly admitting he was bored, only to find Cloud wound up tighter than his own bandages. He'd been no fun at all, and Reno hadn't been able to tell if he was still angry about the fight or something else.

Cloud still wasn't entirely back to normal, but he was at least better now that he was out of the hospital. What Reno had been planning to tell Cloud soon as he saw him had ended up getting pushed farther and farther back. It was mostly because of Reno's second-guessing and partially because Cloud was scaring him a bit with his moodiness.

It had been eating him since Wednesday night when he talked to Tuesti. The man had dumped some serious shit on him (not that he hadn't done the same), and Reno needed to share. There was no way he could keep this one down. Of course, that sentiment was wonderful and all, but Reno had actually stayed up Thursday night wondering if he _should_ tell Cloud.

The blond did admire the General with either hero-worship or a serious crush at least, but either way, no one liked to hear their hero/crush was made by a crazy-ass scientist. But then, Reno reminded himself, he loathed ignorance, and that was something he and Cloud had in common, so wouldn't Cloud rather know? Even if it made him angry at Reno, the redhead would be forgiven in the end since he could hardly be blamed. It's not like Cloud appreciated being left in the dark.

It wasn't a totally convincing argument to Reno, so he'd fine-tuned it Friday with an offer. He'd tell Cloud first about the Ravens, so Cloud could go warn his First Class SOLDIER friend who could tell all his buddies, and then tell Cloud about the General. That way, he wouldn't be starting out empty, but already have a couple good points in.

That decided Reno slowed his walk down, hoping Cloud would take the cue. Cloud might take a brutal pace, but Reno knew he wouldn't be able to keep that up for long. The blond's gait was still stiff from the fractured rib. The black eyes from his broken nose had disappeared over the week, though Dan had commented quietly that Cloud looked sleep deprived, or at least overly tired. There was still some tape on his nose, but Cloud had been checked out on Monday (Shinra probably held them only as long as they couldn't walk or wheel out) with only a warning not to partake in any physically activity for "awhile". Which in Shinra standards still meant far too soon to be healthy.

They both slowed down though, and Reno prepped himself for what he was going to throw at Cloud. He wasn't ready to tell the blond he was talking with Reeve—Cloud might not like that, Reno wasn't sure—so he thought it safer to just not mention a source.

"Cloud." The blond turned to look at him. He was tired, that much was obvious from the pallor of his face and the bags under his eyes that Reno knew weren't remnants of two black eyes. The blond hadn't been sleeping, and Reno empathized. He had some nasty times where sleep was the last thing he could do—whether he wanted to or not. "I found something out."

Cloud didn't say anything for a moment, but he walked closer to Reno and craned his head. Even though there was no one close enough to overhear, Reno let him have his paranoid quirks.

"You've got that First Class friend right? Well, I know he's your friend and, see, I heard something…" Reno felt a little sheepish talking like this. He felt a little like some kind of double-agent passing on information like this, even if Reeve and Cloud weren't really on opposite sides or even aware of each other at all.

Cloud didn't physically cue him to continue, but his expression had softened a bit from his harder tension. That was good enough for Reno. "The Firsts are being deployed to do something about that nutsy group AVALANCHE." Cloud didn't say a word but his eyes flicked to Reno's, obviously curious."I've heard about these 'Ravens'. Nasty monsters they are. Flying, mutated, fight with claws, all the shit. I got a friend who saw 'em under the plate. Bad piece of work."

Cloud stopped walking, staring at Reno. He seemed hunched a bit, unsure. "What do you want?" The words were curt, but Cloud's tone wasn't. He was a little confused even though it didn't really show. But there was also a dangerous tension in him ready to spike at the wrong words.

"Who said I want anything?" He didn't sound nearly as cocky as he did usually. Reno couldn't help feeling affronted that Cloud expected him to be a self-serving bastard like that when they were friends, but really the blond normally wasn't terribly far off the mark.

Cloud didn't respond. It was obvious there was some part of him that understood that life in the slums was about number one and that there was no charity. Which was weird, considering Cloud's mountain-village background. _Not important right now,_ Reno thought. "Alright alright, so I found something else out too." He wasn't going to fight that perception. He actually felt a little proud Cloud hadn't taken him at face value, which was bizarre because Reno usually relied on that."I found out the General is Professor Hojo's experiment. Well, I mean, like, he made the General what he is, with all the mako and super-SOLDIER junk."

Reno urgently looked at Cloud's face, wondering if he might see Cloud breakdown or something. Which would be a sight in itself, but it also made Reno a little nervous. He hadn't exactly broken that one nicely. But the blond seemed fine, completely unchanged.

"Everyone knows that Reno."

Reno's jaw almost dropped but he managed to catch himself in time. "You already knew that?" Had Reeve screwed him over? _No…_ There's no way Reno wouldn't have heard this before from inside Shinra, even if it weren't talked about much. Hell, no one talked about mutant beasts from the labs and Turk cover-ups, but Reno still knew about those. This was Cloud flashing that weird edge he'd had for a while now. Was that on purpose for Reno to pick up, or unintentional? Or was 'everyone' a set group of people? Was Cloud a part of something else? Reno couldn't believe how many questions exploded in his head at just that simple comment.

"Every SOLDIER gets mako from Hojo." Cloud looked a little angry, and Reno had the sudden thought that maybe Cloud was attempting to defend the General when Cloud's second comment threw that one out the window. "The whole of SOLDIER is his science experiment."

Reno wanted to ask something like "then what the fuck are you trying out for?" but all that came out was, "But the General's different."

"He's just stronger than they are." Cloud was started walking fast now, and Reno was starting to feel some strain on his ankle as he tried to catch up. "Takes mako better or something."If that wasn't a complete dismissal of the topic Reno didn't know what was. He considered briefly attempting to continue it, then figured there might be another angle he could work later.

"I can't believe they don't put that on the application form. 'Warning: If pass the SOLDIER Exam, will become the side-project of mad scientist.'" Reno knew his totally lame attempt at sarcasm was pretty bad, and it showed.

Cloud didn't answer him though, another voice did. "Shinra doesn't put a straight label on anything. Ever look at the fine print? Says 'see article 493C of the Archives for further information'. Only Shinra officials with written permission and the board of directors have access to the archives." Cloud and Reno approached the building where Zack was standing. He was smirking at Reno who was eyeing him. To the unspoken question Zack answered, "Your voices carry."

The First Class SOLDIER looked smug at Reno's peeved look for responding to a conversation he wasn't a part of. Reno knew he was crazy popular among the SOLDIERs, but that didn't mean the redhead had to like him. Which was childish but entirely true.

The SOLDIER didn't linger on Reno too long, preferring to look at Cloud. He had an openness to him that probably drew as much as repulsed introverts like Cloud, but clearly Zack had too much magnetism to resist. (Reno liked to think Cloud was coerced into the friendship sometimes, but he knew better) There was certainly magnetism to this First Class, a charisma and charm that was probably three times more deceptive than any manipulation. **  
**

Reno glanced at Cloud to share a raised eyebrow look, but the blond was staring at the shed. He looked uncomfortable to be here, and Reno glanced at the SOLDIER before looking back at Cloud. Clearly the fight hadn't been discussed yet between them. Reno shrugged though—not his problem.

Reno then looked over at the shed too and realized the damn thing was bigger than he thought. It was long and thin, not too high though neither he nor Cloud was particularly tall. There was a stacked pile of paint cans in a neat pyramid to the side, half the height of Reno. This might take a while.

"Alright you two, you got lucky. Defeat in battle is the real punishment." Reno wasn't even paying attention. He was eyeing the decorative figurine above the door of the Shinra logo and wondering if that was real bronze. He could probably sell it or get it melted down for something. "You've got all weekend to paint the entire exterior of the shed. That white paint over there is primer. You'll put the other coat on once it dries tomorrow."

Reno looked away from the figurine and back at the SOLDIER who was grinning at him knowingly. "If you screw up the job you'll get a proper punishment through the chain of command. Which won't be pretty because I know the guy who'll give it to you, and he's a bastard. So do it right. And nothing should take a little walk and go missing." The damn man even had the audacity to wink at him."Cloud, can I talk to you for a moment?"

Reno let them walk away around the corner of the shed as he looked around. If Cloud's expression was anything to go by, he was glad he didn't have to answer to that guy. Zack— _that was his name wasn't it?_ —seemed like a real charmer and genuinely nice. But those guys were the ones who surprised you by suddenly turning nasty, and there's nothing worse than seeing the blacker side of someone you couldn't see it in before.

Not that a little part of Reno wasn't curious to see if Cloud would tell his SOLDIER friend what he'd told him. _They better not be gone long though,_ he thought, _I ain't doing all this by myself._

* * *

"How you feeling?" Zack was looming over Cloud protectively, hovering like a mother hen. He didn't even mention the fight, just going straight for his usual main concern, which seemed to be Cloud's health: mental, emotional, and physical. How Zack encompassed all that in one question Cloud had never quite figured out.

"Fine Zack, just a bit stiff."

"Ah well, you should've taken advantage of laying in the hospital for as long as you could. I heard you zipped out of there. Unless you get a leg ripped off you won't be in there longer than a day as a SOLDIER."

Cloud flushed before he could help himself at Zack's easy assurance of him being a SOLDIER. Some part of Cloud still doubted he would make it, still expected the failure he suffered before. Zack's wholehearted support and reassurances were new this time around, and they still caught Cloud off guard. He didn't like to admit it, but he craved hearing those acknowledgements from Zack, to hear the words come out his mouth so sure, surer than Cloud ever was in life.

Which reminded him, he should probably warn Zack. Reno's words had initially made Cloud suspicious of any ulterior motive. If Reno had gotten defensive or angry, Cloud might seriously have considered withholding the information from Zack, but when Reno had just sighed and not bothered to comment on it, Cloud truly wanted to think Reno had done it out of friendship. Setting aside Reno for a moment, Cloud had been horribly surprised to hear about AVALANCHE's movements. He hadn't realized how far alone they'd nothing too drastic would change. Was Barret a member yet?

Cloud took a deep breath, looking at Zack's face as the SOLDIER examined his face and gently prodded his torso wrappings. "Zack, I need to tell you something." Cloud stopped Zack's impromptu examination. His friend looked down at him with curious, generous eyes. His breathing was even, his mouth quirked ever so slightly at the corner. His eyes, Cloud noticed vaguely _,_ were a different kind of blue than his own, more water rather than sky. Cloud took a moment to take in the features: the playful smile on his lips, the locks of black hair that dangled just in front of his face, his bright eyes, that thin white scar just below his left ear.

Cloud breathed out and looked down at the ground. "I heard the First are going to be sent out after AVALANCHE."

Zack didn't hesitate to try to put his mind at rest. "You don't have to worry Cloud." Zack's hand landed on his shoulder, squeezing gently. "You know I'll be fine. Seph will kick my dead carcass' ass if I let something kill me that easily."

Cloud carefully put his hands into his pocket to stop himself from wringing them. "I know, but see…"

"I said don't worry Cloud." He was almost cutting him off, and Cloud felt a little down at that. Didn't Zack want to hear this from him?

Zack had been absent from the hospital and hadn't even come to see Cloud. It had bothered the blond more than he liked to admit, aware that his attachment to Zack could become very clingy very fast. But surely Zack, the ever kind, ever concerned friend, would visit him in the hospital? Why hadn't he?

Cloud shook his head quickly to clear away those thoughts. He knew little about Zack's childhood and early years at Shinra, but he'd heard and read about the events that almost broke his best friend. The Ravens were just the first step towards that, and that was most likely what was taking up Zack's time. It was a shaky excuse, but one Cloud maintained nonetheless. He'd seen the nasty scar Zack's "friend" had inflicted, heard the pain in his voice in that one debriefing audiotape found in the rubble, and Cloud felt unsteady when he thought of how little he could do. He'd been incapacitated and hidden away from the doings of AVALANCHE and the world. This was the least he could do for his friend.

Before Zack could get another mindless reassurance in, Cloud started."AVALANCHE has these monsters with them. They've got a crazy scientist who made them based off information about SOLDIERs." It came out in a rush, but Cloud felt the uncomfortable tightness in his chest relax just a little. Zack would be prepared, and that was half the battle.

Zack was silent for a long moment. "Cloud." After a beat Cloud looked up to make eye had a faintly disapproving air that immediately made Cloud feel bad, guilty even, the way his mother had been able to. The SOLDIER had not moved at all, and yet he seemed to have taken a step back and assumed the rank he really was. There was a distance there hadn't been before."How do you know this?"

Cloud's eyes flicked away immediately. He had hoped Zack would just take his word on it. That had obviously been too much with all that he was withholding already. Zack wasn't stupid, far from it."They're called Ravens, probably because they can fly or at least have wings. I don't know how many there are, but not a lot."

Zack put his other hand on Cloud's bicep, holding him there in place. The First had taken some of the cold edge off, but they still were far from where they'd been moments ago."Cloud, how do you know this?"

Cloud swallowed. "I heard it from someone."

"Don't feed me that crap, Cloud." The blond stiffened at the rebuttal by Zack. His words were sharp, and Cloud immediately felt a great welling of guilt inside. This was Zack, the last person he wanted to lie to, and yet the first person he had to. The blond didn't look away from his the grass off to the side; aware of the chastising Zack was laying on him without words. Was he hurt that Cloud didn't tell him the truth?Or was he just suspicious of him? "Look, I'm sorry Cloud."

Zack lifted one hand and ran it through his hair. The tension didn't entirely break, but Zack seemed more normal, if stressed."Can you at least tell me who you heard it from?"

Cloud hesitated. He didn't really want to sell-out Reno, but he didn't want to screw up what he had with Zack any more than he already just had. Zack or Reno? "Reno."

"Ah of course." Cloud caught the slightly relaxing of Zack's shoulder, the fleeting look of relief on his face. Cloud felt a terrible duality at that: guilt towards Reno, elation towards looked away for a moment, before pulling Cloud suddenly into a surprise hug. "I'll take your word for it." He ruffled Cloud's hair a second before letting him go and walking off.

Cloud watched Zack go, feeling strange and indefinable inside. He wasn't sure if he'd done the right thing, and yet he felt he had. That information could save lives, and yet, what had he done?


	20. The Long and Short of It

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cloud and Zack spend the day together, while Reno gets some (unasked for) quality time with Tseng.

Cloud pulled on a thicker long-sleeve shirt for the autumn chill while Reno lounged on his bed with his arms tucked behind his head. The redhead had on a sweatshirt and thick socks with a hole in one toe. The bunkers weren't heated or air conditioned, so the cadets were subject to the whim of the weather, and with winter rapidly approaching, the temperatures were really dropping at night. Cloud was long-used to cold nights. He'd lived in Nibelheim throughout his childhood, and then in the desert, where it could be below freezing at night and dangerously hot in the day.

They had finished painting the shed by mid-afternoon on Sunday, much to their relief, and Zack had swung by to check the job and ask if Cloud wanted to head into Lower Midgar with him to cap off the weekend. Despite Cloud's desire to hang out with Zack, and the fact that he wanted to visit Aeris again, he was still a little reluctant. He'd overheard something last night that any thought of Zack made Cloud a little grumpy and a little embarrassed.

Reno coughed pointedly and Cloud ignored him, pushing that particularly thought back where it came from. He had already explained why he was leaving and why Reno couldn't come. The redhead hadn't looked too miffed or hurt, but he still liked to talk the topic of Zack to death. "Doesn't your Firstie have to go off and fight AVALANCHE?"

Cloud sighed. Reno's inherent nosiness would probably never go away—and that was both a blessing and a curse sometimes. Right now it was giving him a headache. Reno seemed to be suspicious of Zack, and Cloud didn't want to know if it was jealousy or if he was just fishing for information. "He doesn't leave until tomorrow. Which is why we're going today."

The other cadet sighed loudly, but he'd exhausted this conversation earlier and Cloud remained stubbornly silent while he laced up his second boot. When Reno's eyes remained on him, Cloud finally looked up, starting to get really annoyed. "Zack needs to go down to Lower Midgar for some supplies and equipment. He's just inviting me along."

Reno looked like he wanted to open his mouth, but Cloud didn't wait to hear it; he had to get going if he wanted to make the next train. He stuffed his wallet into his pocket and swept a quick glance around the room. He had his knife in his boot, the switchblade he owned now in one pocket. His Shinra ID card was in his wallet, which had some Gil for the train ride and dinner, though Zack was likely to treat if he got the chance. He didn't have a scarf or gloves, and he couldn't remember why he wouldn't have brought those from home, but no matter.

He left without a goodbye to Reno and met Zack down at the station, where the First was casually dressed in jeans and a long-sleeve shirt with a vest over it. Unlike Cloud's dark colors, Zack boasted a green long-sleeve shirt in an eye-catching shade. It didn't matter to Zack that he stood out—being a SOLDIER on its own was usually fairly distinctive. It was hard to disguise a First. For starters, the mako-glow of their eyes was a dead giveaway. More interestingly though, most people could inherently tell they'd been enhanced and automatically gave them a wide berth, something no one quite understood. Most assumed it was the level of mako inside them reacting to people's limited connection to the Planet. Cloud had gotten the same reactions once upon a time.

The blond didn't even step on to the platform before Zack's hand was ruffling his hair and he was already talking. "Cloud, we're going to pick up some great food from this restaurant I found for tonight after I get my stuff done. They do a lot of this heavy meat stuff—food you mountain boy should recognize. Beef stroganoff's a specialty there I think."

Cloud's mouth almost watered as his mind immediately drew an image of his mother's homemade broth. He hadn't had the heavier, meatier food of the colder regions in _years_. More than years, _a decade_. The fair was so different from the lighter food Midgar imported or the dairy, seafood, and wheat products of most other towns, that his hometown's style of cooking was hard to find. Trust Zack to think of something like that.

Cloud had a flash of his childhood bowl painted with rabbits before the train came into the station in a screeching cacophony of sound that made sure any conversation was impossible. The blond realized he hadn't bought a ticket, but Zack already had two in his hand. The SOLDIER grabbed Cloud by the elbow and steered him into a seat before he could open his mouth.

"Don't worry about it. I was a cadet too you know, and I know you guys are living on pocket-change."

Cloud closed his mouth and figured it prudent not to mention that he had pocket-change for spending whereas some people in the slums really _did_ live on pocket-change. Zack knew that, and Cloud knew that Zack had hardened himself to the sights of the slums just as Cloud had done years ago. The blond refused to consider what might happen to these people if Meteor never freed them. It was not something he wanted to think about on an outing with Zack.

Cloud had been planning to make this trip to Lower Midgar for a while now in fact, but he had never found the time to do it. Now that he was healed from his injuries and had the time, he was going to Aeris to see if she knew what it was all about. He may command massive power over the materia, but that didn't equate to control. After nearly melting the floor of a practice room by accident, Cloud had decided it was simply safer not to rely on materia right now. Magic wouldn't be a major part of the exam anyway, so it wouldn't matter too much if he neglected that part of his training.

As they sat on the train together Zack chattered to Cloud. "I've got a couple of errands to run, back and forth, you know? You don't mind doing a bit of shopping alone right? Wall Market's safe enough so long as you don't keep your wallet in your back pocket."

"Sure," Cloud nodded along, secretly relieved. The blond didn't question if Zack had something to hide, because it conveniently let Cloud hide his own errand too.

The train rattled to a grinding halt, the force of the momentum almost knocking several people over, and Zack and Cloud left the train and walked to Wall Market together, Zack sticking closer to Cloud than was strictly necessary. There really wasn't a way to lighten the mood is this dismal part of the slums, but Zack valiantly tried. Cloud didn't pay much attention to his words though, keeping his eyes forward. He didn't look at the children that scurried by barefoot, or flinch at the stench of the trash heaps that were making his eyes water.

Zack's eyes, he knew, were focused on him to stop them from roving. Cloud's situation years and years ago had allowed him to master the ability to ignore what was happening around him and focus on one thing, and Zack was doing the exact same thing. As he talked to Cloud ideas for their next training session, Zack didn't have to put those glowing eyes on any uncomfortable Wall Market patrons, and he didn't have to look straight at the way the people down here lived. Zack was more sensitive and sympathetic than Cloud, and it hurt the SOLDIER to see it. Cloud had long ago learned how to wall off those parts of himself.

They had just crossed the perimeter into the market place when Zack's arm tightened across Cloud's shoulders, drawing him in closer. Cloud was about to ask Zack about it, when the SOLDIER casually steered them to the left, the darker-haired man subtly looking over Cloud at something. The blond picked up on it and slid his eyes over in time to see Barret, his gun-arm swinging as he trundled along, cut through the crowd.

Cloud's eyes were riveted to Barret as the man trooped by. He had to consciously suppress any visible reaction so as not to alert Zack, forcing himself not to turn his head as the man walked past. He lowered his eyes, aware that he hadn't been thinking much on his AVALANCHE. They had been as close as possible to being his family, and though he had hardly ever visited the more distant members, it had been because he knew they were just fine and they'd always be there for him. Jenova's second reunion attempt had proven that.

But here… Barret had looked pissed. His face had been set in a scowl, his cheeks faintly colored—Cloud had worked with him long enough to spot it even under his dark skin tone—his good arm had been clenched, and the muscles of both biceps and forearms had been tight with protruding veins. His gun-arm had swung in a dangerous arc, and he'd radiated ferocity.

Cloud hadn't realized the crowd had toned down or backed away at Barret's passing until their voices surged up again when the AVALANCHE member was safely out of Wall Market. Cloud felt like an hour had passed when in reality it had been seconds. He raised his eyes back to Zack's, whose own eyes lingered on the gate before he turned back to Cloud all smiles. He rubbed Cloud's hair affectionately before the blond could duck out of the way. "I'll meet you back here in an hour. Don't eat since we'll be picking up that food as promised a bit later. We'll eat in my apartment—the place is too small for tables. And don't spend too much gil!"

With a quick wave and a big smile, Zack trotted off into the crowd. Cloud waited for a moment at that spot, making sure Zack really was gone, then summarily turned right back around and walked out of Wall Market.

He wound through the playground, full of children on the weekend, though children would be here all week because the school system under the plate was so poor. He walked through the garbage dumps and through the wall, past trash heaps and dangerous electrical wires lying on the ground waiting for a baby to gnaw where the rats had not. It was a dangerous world in the slums, but Cloud was, unfortunately, familiar with it.

Aeris' church looked exactly the same as it had the last time he had been here, still an island of serenity in an otherwise chaotic and dark world. He could see the beams of sunlight through the lone hole in the plate shoot down and into the church, like the Planet had punched a fist through the metal and stone just so Aeris could have her flower garden.

This time he didn't hesitate as much. He knew more or less what to expect. He pushed open the heavy oak door and strode down the aisle. The stone angel standing beside the altar had its arms open wide to greet him. The room was heated with the sun, enticing a pleasant shiver along his spine. The flowers at the end were like a great pool of beauty, spilling out around the stone and rotting wood. He remembered this place so well.

Almost reverently he sat in the second pew, half afraid to step into the flowers for fear of crushing them. Aeris had always been able to walk amongst them without hurting a single blossom, and Cloud had done so on occasion, but he felt heavy now, clunky. He wasn't sure why.

"Ah, would you like a flower, Cloud?"

He sagged a little into the pew at hearing her voice. He hadn't quite realized he'd been afraid she wouldn't be here.

"Yes, one please."

She whispered by him, her leather boots as soft and quiet as silk. She meandered amongst the flowers looking for just the right one, leaning her hands down sometimes to brush her fingers along the satiny petals. She plucked one and carefully murmured something softly to it before handing it to him. With the utmost of care, he took the flower and admired it for a moment, before reaching up and tucking it behind Aeris' ear.

She smiled softly at him, like a mother looking over a child, and Cloud had the distinct impression that the Planet was looking at him too. But then he blinked and her eyes were the fresh green that was Aeris and Aeris alone. His love for her was overwhelming, and he felt full and warm because of it.

She settled down in the flower grove now though, her skirts spreading out around her until she looked like the pink queen of flowers in her garden. "It's wonderful to see you, Cloud." He nodded. "I suppose you didn't just come here for a flower?"

He leaned back in the pew and stretched his legs out in front of him. He rubbed his hands down his face and tried to muster what he wanted. The sheer purity of this place was a balm on his soul, and he didn't feel like anything could bother him here.

"I- my magic. It's more powerful than before."

Aeris smoothed her skirt out with both hands, smiling down into her flowers. She petted one gently as she spoke. "The Planet knows more than you can imagine, and yet can only guess. But a more natural… boost was the only thing the Planet could offer."

Cloud tilted his head back to look at the ceiling, staring at the patterns made by the rafters and the cracked roof. He could see the nest of what must be a bird, and the jagged edges of the hole that let the sun through.

"It's to help me?"

"Yes." Aeris' voice was soft, pleasant.

Cloud didn't need to say anymore. He didn't know if the Planet was trying to make up for something, or if it knew he would need that ability with materia later, but if the Planet was offering, he would accept. He had a healthy respect for the Planet now, even if he didn't always agree with it.

Standing up from the pew took more effort than usual, the strange peace of this place lending lethargy to his limbs. He carefully walked into the field of flowers until they gathered around his boots. He thought of how her church had changed after the triplets turned it into a pool of water, how the flowers rimmed it and their petals would congregate on the surface.

And Aeris watching the children play in it; no longer burdened by Geostigma. When he thought of it that way, he could feel the coolness of a different lake again: a darker, deeper one; her gentle weight in his arms; how her dress billowed around her as he let her drift to the bottom with his tears accompanying her the way down. He felt like he was standing in that lake again, looking down at her peaceful face, eyes closed as she rejoined the Planet.

He had deliberately not thought on those memories in many years. But as he stared down at her now, as she beckoned to him with a single motion to submerge himself in flowers, he was able to look back on it with a degree of respectful distance he hadn't dared to think he would ever achieve.

* * *

"There you are Cloud!" Zack threw an arm around his shoulders, squeezing them just as he had this morning. Only Zack could ever get away with being that touchy-feely around Cloud. "Where'd you wander off to?"

Cloud pressed a little closer to Zack, remembering that memory of him leaning against the doorframe of the church. It had assaulted him as soon as he turned to leave the church: Zack with a smile on his face as he stood with Aeris while Cloud looked on, always a few steps behind.

"Just found a quiet spot."

Zack ruffled his hair with the hand on his shoulder before guiding Cloud into a different part of Wall Market. "Sometime I should really take you to this church. It's too late now, but there's the sweetest girl there. I dated her for a bit you know—but Shinra and her don't get along, and it didn't work. Still, she's beautiful and there's no place more peaceful than that church."

Cloud held back the 'I know' and settled for a half-smile.

They walked together through the streets, the day failing as the lights when on. Shop owners lit lanterns outside their stores, and the crowds subtly changed from families to couples and working men. Zack seemed to know where he was going, and Cloud basked in the feel of Zack's powerful arm across his shoulders, protective, as the man had always been.

"Here we are!" Zack beamed as he pulled his arm off Cloud and opened the door. The blond followed him in, ignoring the sudden cold across his shoulders.

* * *

Reno grabbed the darker-haired man's arm and twisted, unbalancing him from where he hovered over the redhead, effectively pulling him down on his left side. Quick as he could, Reno slipped out from under him and attempted to slither off the bed before the other could get up, only to have him flip over and, like a snake, slip his leg around Reno's waist, pushing him flat on the mattress again.

They'd been going at it for some time, no one quite able to get the upper hand, though Reno knew that like every other time, Tseng was just playing with him. Tseng was a bastard like that.

"Get off me you- mmf!"

Tseng chuckled before shoving Reno's head into the pillow. "I have every right to detain you. Again. You did break into my rooms."

Reno tried to buck futilely, but Tseng's grip was like iron, and he had one leg straddling both of Reno's effectively trapping him. He was going to bruise—again—because Tseng couldn't play nice.

"What the hell do you want?" Reno deflated back into the bed. With Cloud out for the rest of the day and Reno left with nothing to do, after a couple of beers, a shot or two, and some pumping up from the other drunk cadets, seeing what Tseng was up to or at least poking around his rooms had sounded like a fabulous idea. And hey! If Tseng's guns were there then, what the hell? Reno had to try it now.

(He may have had a little more to drink than anticipated.)

Of course, Tseng was supposed to be in his office because that's what all of Reno's sources said, but the _one time_ he wasn't there was the moment a somewhat drunk Reno decided to break in. Tseng was even more of a bastard now than he'd been before, if that were possible. Reno thought the interrogation had been the worst, but Tseng had never gloated quite like this before.

The man shifted, sinuously brushing the length of his body against Reno and the redhead blanched. "Hey, hey!" He immediately renewed struggling, determined not to let Tseng grope his way out of this mess. Not his fault being a teenager meant that tactic worked. Let them do another interrogation or whatever, he'd take the General over this.

Tseng was laughing, Reno realized, as he gave up twisting out of the grip. The man had this low laugh that wasn't quite mirth so much as mocking, and Reno was miffed as the Turk put his free arm on the redhead's back and reclined there, perfectly relaxed. Like he didn't have an angry cadet ready to punch him in the throat under him.

"What did you think you were doing, Reno? What was I to think?" Tseng started laughing again, and Reno resolutely didn't shiver. Angrily the cadet opened his mouth to defend himself and mention the guns, when he realized suddenly how bad that was going to sound. He'd sound like a thief or, worse, like he was making some sexual innuendo—and Tseng _would_ take that the wrong way. On purpose.

Reno promptly shut his mouth. He wasn't giving this bastard _any_ ideas.

"Hm? No answer?"

With surprising agility, Tseng was able to slip Reno's knife from his boot, cut through the seams of the cadet's tattered coat, slicing through it like butter because that was a _fucking expensive knife_ and discarding the jacket a moment later. Reno cursed into the pillow but didn't dare move. He knew that knife because it was his, and it was razor sharp, and it was currently in an expert's hand.

Thankfully though Tseng carelessly tossed the knife to the floor. At Reno's revived attempts to free himself, Tseng tsked in the back of his throat and pressed down with his body weight to keep the redhead under him. He weighed more than he looked, as Reno's staggered breathing could attest. "I will let you go if you tell me what you were attempting to find in my room—and how you knew these were my rooms at all."

Tseng pulled the redhead's head up by his hair, allowing him to speak. Reno gasped, "Didn't know they were your rooms."

Reno was panting for air, but Tseng had a genial smile on his face, the scary kind that meant he was enjoying this. Tseng shook his head, and he pushed Reno back down into the pillow. Immediately Reno started fighting back again, but he still couldn't break his grip, though he kicked up frantically trying to dislodge Tseng's leg.

Tseng was forced to half-straddle Reno to keep the cadet's legs from getting free. Still, he managed to lazily run a hand down the redhead's spine, over one hip, and ghost down the back of his left leg, running along his clothes with a lover's touch despite how much Reno was fighting. Much to Tseng's amusement, Reno could help the shiver that ran up his spine, though he attempted to roll to the side to escape it. Tseng laughed breathily.

"I'm asking you again, Reno."

When the redhead came up for air this time, he didn't even try to meet Tseng's eyes, though he looked just as angry as before, perhaps with a mixture of embarrassment in there as well. "I tol' you, okay?"

Tseng noted how his accent had gotten thicker, and his voice wasn't nearly as sarcastic as before. He was still trying to sound angry, but it didn't come off nearly as strong as before. Reno really did have a weak spot.

He pushed the redhead back down, still locking both the boy's arms with one hand. This time Tseng brushed away Reno's ponytail before putting two fingers against the back of his neck. Then, with great precision, he made sure to run those fingers down every bump and dip of his spine, going slowly enough for Reno to squirm. This time he didn't swivel his fingers away to the redhead's hip, but kept a straight line right for Reno's-

"I heard 'bout your fuckin' guns and I wanted to see 'em!" Reno sounded mildly hysterical as the Turk's fingers came to a slow stop right at the rise of Reno's backside. _Interesting…_

"My guns?"

Reno turned his head to the side away from Tseng. His breathing was harsh, and he looked incredibly uncomfortable. "Yeah. Can you let me go now?"

Tseng's lips curved up. "I am afraid I only have one on me at the moment. I would be willing to show you if…"

He let it dangle knowing what Reno would read into it. Just to add a little more spice, his fingers on Reno's lower back began to drift just a little farther down.

Reno squirmed even more. "No way asshole! I ain't some whore."

"Please," Tseng was terribly close to laughing again at the way Reno tensed at his deliberately pleading tone, "you mistaken me," He corrected before Reno's heart gave out. He really was susceptible to sexual ploys. A huge weakness when it came to the Turks, althought Tseng did wonder if it might just be him alone who could do this to Reno. He'd have to test that theory out some time… "Though I'm not adverse to that sort of payment, I do wonder how you've heard of them."

The response was immediate. "Slums. You hear things."

"Hm… I'm not sure I believe that," Tseng breathed out as he leaned over the redhead enough to see the boy's Adam's apple bob as he gulped. Teasingly slow, Tseng made sure to drag his entire body over Reno's back and buttocks as he came over the redhead to be on the side Reno's head was facing. Making sure Reno could see him now; he let the boy's hands go.

Almost immediately Reno rolled on to his right side, rubbing his wrists mutinously. He quickly stood up from the bed as Tseng unbuttoned his jacket, laughing lightly at Reno's outraged face, before he opened his jacket to reveal a holster with a gun. Reno tensed instinctively at seeing it, but the Turk pulled out the solid black weapon and held it out sideways for the redhead to see.

He was going to say something more, but Reno was staring at it in awe, momentarily distracted from the situation. "That's the Beretta automatic loadable two ways. How the _fuck_ do you shoot that thing with one hand?"

He looked like he wanted to reach out and touch it, but Tseng pulled his hand back. "Ah, ah, ah. You've got your wish. It seems you know quite a bit about this gun, so tell me, where might a cadet and… slum-boy have picked that up?"

Standing while Tseng was sitting didn't give Reno any sense of security. Tseng was on the side of the bed with the door behind him, and the man was too fast for Reno to slip by. Answering was out of the question too; Reno wasn't going to rat on Cloud.

"I ain't tellin'. Would 'I forgot' be a better answer?" He tried to regain some of his arrogance, but Tseng just laughed at him, seeing right through the bravado.

"Come now Reno, we both know how… adept I am at interrogation."

Reno wanted to say that wasn't true, that Tseng didn't interrogate, he got handsy with people and sniffed out lies like a fucking fiend. Reno had prided himself on his ability to talk himself out of things, but the man had some kind of freakish radar for Reno's weak points.

"That's because you're a damn cheater."

Tseng carefully holstered the gun as he stood and smoothed his pants out. "You won't leave I'm afraid, until I know."

Reno tried to continue feigning disinterest while he hurriedly wondered about Cloud. _How the fuck had he known?_ Reno would bet anything only Turks and dead men had seen that gun. Maybe Cloud was actually a Turk? It didn't really make sense, but at the moment it didn't matter. Reno still wasn't telling. No one was interrogating Cloud until he got the first swing.

"I'm not talking."

Tseng was up in his face in a second, pushing Reno up against the wall. The Turk had two warm fingers in Reno's belt cuff; he could feel the heat from the digits even through his pants. Tseng jerked him a little closer that way, and even though he and Reno were about the same height, Reno felt very small as Tseng casually smoothed out Reno's shirt with his other hand. He could certainly fake disinterest a lot better than Reno, but he wasn't the one being _molested_ either.

"You see Reno, you shouldn't think of it as tattling. Children tattle. You are an adult. And adults know when they've lost."

Reno, unnerved by the proximity and getting angry at Tseng for being such a fucking perv, lashed out. "Fuck you Tseng, you can–"

Tseng's mouth was unforgiving against Reno's as he took his free hand and curled in around the boy's ponytail, pulling hard so Reno bowed his back and let Tseng take more of him. He pulled on the belt loop until he could feel Reno's hardness against his own. The redhead made some vague attempted at saying something, but Tseng's tongue was right there, and Reno stopped thinking all together.

When Tseng's fingers followed the waistline of Reno's pants, spreading molten warmth along his skin, Reno seemed to regain some semblance of control. He tried to bite down on the other man's tongue, even turning his head to get away, but Tseng was hardly letting him breathe let alone move, his hand on Reno's hair tugged unmercifully if the redhead tried to shift away.

It wasn't until Reno pulled Tseng forward by his jacket that he had his chance. As soon as their chests touched, Reno shoved the Turk away, actually managing to make Tseng stumble for a second.

The redhead was panting, his mind a blurred mess of, " _what the fuck_ " and " _holy effing Planet_ ". He touched his lips to check if they were wet and really bruised, and by the time he looked up, Tseng had collected himself. Somehow behind that blank façade he looked smugger than before.

Reno felt his face get hot as he realized the Turk wasn't even flustered. It was like he casually kissed any man that he dragged into his personal space anytime. Reno certainly felt uncomfortable, but more than anything he was pissed that he didn't feel more violated. This bastard had groped him twice now in as many weeks, and Reno came from a place where he understood well sexual violence. But really, before he'd understood Tseng groped and teased him like that because it got results—hell, Reno had used that trick once or twice _not that he'd ever admit it_ —but making out with him was another ballpark. And then well…any man getting rubbed up against like, like… _that_ would react.

Tseng took a step forward, and Reno wanted to back up but he was already against the wall. Tseng reached up and Reno's mouth went dry, but he only unbuttoned the top three buttons on his shirt enough to show off the lean muscle of his chest, before he discarded his jacket and loosened his tie. His hair was mussed up and his lips red, and he looked so goddamn edible… Reno's mind stuttered to a halt.

_Oh fuck. Sorry, Cloud._

"Cloud. He told me. Now let me the fuck out of this room!"

Tseng tsked even as he smiled. He shook his head and took a couple more steps towards Reno. The redhead had no qualms about pressing himself more firmly against the wall, but after a moment to take in the very distraught redhead who was having a personal crisis at the moment, Tseng simply went and sat on the bed. "A pity. Well, as promised you may leave. I'm sure I'll be seeing you again soon enough."

Reno would have run out of the room if Tseng weren't just sitting on the bed with that… _look_. A look that did _not_ belong on a Turk's face aimed at Reno.

The redhead skirted around the bed, taking careful measures not to touch Tseng or be anywhere within reaching distance, before bolting through the living room and slamming the door as he ran out.

Tseng sat there in his bedroom, admiring the tousled sheets on his bed. He rolled the taste of Reno around his mouth before padding out to the living room. He pulled out pad of paper and scrawled out two words:

_Moonshine_

_Cloud_

* * *

The restaurant and train ride back had been uneventful. Cloud had hardly been aware of where they'd been going, just breathing in the familiar spices and scents of the food. The man at the counter had been an easy-going fellow who jumped at the chance to talk about his hometown. Zack had immediately said Cloud was from Nibelheim much to Cloud's embarrassment, but the owner came from a similar mountain town, so with Zack's help the small talk hadn't been too bad. They got out of there with a discount, and Zack left an outrageous tip before Cloud could even reach for his wallet. They walked back to the train station with Zack asking easy questions about Nibelheim and then telling his own stories. The night had almost been perfect until now.

Cloud was walking with Zack down the hall to Zack's apartment when another SOLDIER turned the corner. The blond recognized him immediately and had to fight down a grimace. He had hoped to never see this particular SOLDIER again.

Zack grinned before dangerously swinging one of the bags of food as he waved to the man down the hall. "Kunsel!"

Zack jogged halfway down the hall to his door where he met up with Kunsel who was heading towards the elevator. Cloud trailed behind, playing up being a nervous cadet even though he was sure no one was buying it.

"Kunsel, this is Cloud, Cloud this is Kunsel. He's a Second Class SOLDIER who's stationed at Mideel." Zack turned back from Cloud to the copper-haired man, "You're headin' back tomorrow right?"

Kunsel smiled, his lean face looked open and genuine, a sharp contrast from his harsh appearance in the interrogation room and later in the med wing. Cloud didn't like it one bit. "Nice to finally meet you properly, Cloud. I'm sure you're aware Zack brags incessantly about you." Cloud tried to form a half-smile to be normal, but he was sure he'd mangled it badly. The interrogation, the hospital, and now last night made for a bad impression. Kunsel looked away after a second.

"Whatever you're eating smells good. I'd steal a bite, but I'm late as it is." Cloud didn't visibly show any sign of relief, but he certainly felt it.

Zack looked dramatically disappointed of course, but he laughed it away easily. "That's fine. Another time. I'll see you before you leave tomorrow."

"Yes, I'll see you then. Nice meeting you again, Cloud." With a cheery wave, the SOLDIER walked down the hall.

They both seemed to be pretending the interrogation hadn't happened, and as far as Cloud was concerned that was fine. HE still glanced over his shoulder discreetly at Kunsel, feeling unaccountably angry with him for another reason altogether; the same reason he'd been somewhat reluctant earlier to go out with Zack.

"Come on Cloud, the food's getting cold!"

Zack's apartment was truly lived in. His kitchen was on the left as Cloud stepped in, and even from the doorway he could see how the dishes were a mess around the sink, and the countertop was stained a variety of colors from all sorts of spills Zack had never bothered to clean up. Cloud pulled his boots off at the door even as Zack strode in without a care.

The SOLDIER dumped the bags of food on the counter and dropped his own shopping on the floor of the living room. Cloud could tell one had two materia in it from the glow; there was a visible canteen, but what else the blond couldn't make out. As he pulled out Styrofoam containers from the food bags, Cloud wandered in a little deeper. He never felt all that uncomfortable in Zack's apartment, probably a side-affect of Zack's influence. The man could make anyone feel wanted.

The living room was just behind the kitchen and the biggest open space. It had one long glass window that had a stunning view of the desert and the mountains in the distance. There was a brown suede sofa and a comfortable chair with a glass table in front of them. The carpet was cushy even though there were a variety of random things strewn across it, including cleaning supplies for weapons and plenty of shoes.

Zack hummed as he pulled out the food. "Cloud, can you get some glasses from the kitchen? Just dig around 'til you find some."

Cloud nodded before heading into he kitchen and rummaging around before pulling some blue plastic cups from the back of a cupboard. "What do you want to drink, Zack?"

The SOLDIER crumpled the two bags into a wad in his fist as he looked up. "I think there's some soda in the fridge."

Cloud found the soda and poured some out for them both before he went back into the living room and took a seat on the couch.

The couch was perpendicular to the window and faced a mostly unused TV set. There were also two doors, one the bathroom the other the bedroom, and Zack's bedroom door was wide open. Cloud could see a disaster area of clothing and odds and ends on the floor. No one would ever call Zack neat.

The First flopped down next to him on the couch with two plastic forks in hand along with a metal knife. "I figured a plastic knife wouldn't do the job," he shrugged when Cloud glanced at the mismatched cutlery.

The food was delicious of course. Cloud was fairly sure it wasn't the same as Nibelheim's style—the restaurant owner had said he was from closer to North Corel than Nibelheim—but Cloud couldn't remember what his own home food was like. Either way, the consistency and taste of the food was familiar and warm, and Cloud savored it happily.

Zack seemed to have no complaint either as he ate with occasional sounds of approval. After a couple of minutes of just eating, Zack toed his boots off and scooted back on the couch sideways until he could sit cross-legged while reclining against the arm. Cloud turned halfway to look at him.

"Is your hometown food like this?"

Cloud swallowed before putting one leg on the sofa to look at Zack better. "Yeah, it's similar. The spices are a little different, but this is really great."

Zack smiled as Cloud ate some more just to remind Zack that he was very thankful for the dinner. The SOLDIER didn't often fish for compliments, but a straight thank you was never as good to him as seeing someone's gratitude.

Cloud swallowed another couple of bites before he spoke. "What's food in Gongaga like?"

"Hm?" Zack picked up his container and set it on his lap, not even wincing at the heat. "Gongaga? Fruity I suppose. There's a lot of fruit in the jungle, so everything's got some kind of coconut or lemon sprinkled on it at least. Pan-fried is really popular too. We eat strips of meat in meals with a lot more veggies and stuff. There's no animals that are big enough and good enough to eat in the jungle," Zack paused, and Cloud noticed his vacant stare for a moment. The blond wondered what Zack was recalling. "Nothing like your Nibel wolves."

"We don't eat them. Bad luck."

"Really?" He scooped another bite into his mouth before smiling at Cloud again. "Your people real superstitious?"

Cloud shrugged. He hardly remembered anymore. "More or less. It depended on what though."

"Huh." Zack seemed to chew thoughtfully before changing the subject. "How have classes been?"

"Fine as usual. Mind-numbing mostly."

Zack chuckled, "Yeah, that's the way I remember them."

"The exams are soon so they're pushing us. I'm sure you already know that."

Zack smiled widely at Cloud. "You'll do find. No one in Shinra could let someone like you go, Spike. You're already a SOLDIER as far as I'm concerned."

Zack exaggerated compliments went unheard as the Cloud's imagination conjured an image of him in Red XIII's cage, trapped in the labs while Hojo stood outside the glass chamber laughing. No one would let him go indeed.

Something of what he'd been thinking must have shown on his face because Zack leaned forward, putting his nearly finished dinner on the table. "Everything alright, Spike?"

Realizing Zack's concern, Cloud shoveled another bite of food in. Zack didn't go away though, so Cloud chewed slowly before finally speaking. "Yeah."

He tried to sound glum, and hoped Zack might mistake his mood for sudden nerves. Zack scooted closer and lifted Cloud's food away from him before settling next to him, big and warm. "You don't have to worry, Cloud. With all the extra training you've been doing, you'll be fine. I wish I could give you a hint or something, but Seph's playing it really close to the chest—something about favoritism." He winked at him as Cloud leaned a little into Zack. He hardly heard the supportive words as Zack kept speaking, "You know Kunsel, the guy we met out in the hall?" Cloud blinked and tried not to react to mention of that SOLDIER. "He barely even passed the first time. Seriously, he fumbled the most important part, and the only reason they passed him was because they needed more SOLDIERs after the war and he was halfway decent. You're way better than he was, Cloud, so don't worry so much. The only thing you should worry about is what you'll be drinking when you come here to celebrate getting into SOLDIER!"

Zack smiled fondly and ruffled his hair, and Cloud smiled back, but he wasn't thinking about parties and exams. Kunsel: the interrogator, the SOLDIER, the guy he'd overheard with Zack. As Zack went back to eating, Cloud struggled to forget what he'd heard between him and the Second last night. He'd been on his way to report the finished first layer of paint to Zack when he'd heard them:

" _Tonight's no good, but I can do Friday."_

" _You better make it worth it. It's been months."_

_Chuckle. "Aw, I missed you too, Kunsel."_

_Tussling sounds, Zack might have been ruffling Kunsel's hair or hugging him, but then the moan that followed made it clear it was a lot more familiar than that._

" _Don't you dare, Zack. You know I hate to be left hanging."_

" _Impatient as always. Well, you know I'm a broom-closet sort of man but I can settle for empty conference room…"_

_A couple low groans and some murmured words, then the sound of a zipper before Kunsel's voice cut in loudly. "Planet I hate these quick ones."_

_More muffled grunting, then Zack's voice: "Too late now."_

"Hey, Cloud!"

Cloud blinked as he realized Zack had been saying his name and had finally resorted to nudging him. The blond flushed bright pink as he realized what he'd been thinking about. Zack was sitting right by him as Cloud remembered overhearing him having… getting together with Kunsel in a conference room.

"You okay, Cloud? You totally spaced on me there."

He mumbled a quick apology in the hopes of Zack letting him off, but the SOLDIER reached out and with two calloused fingers touched Cloud's cheek. "You're on fire, Cloud." He smirked before slyly adding in a low tone, "What were you thinking about?"

One glance at Cloud's horrified face and the darker flush on his cheeks that spread quickly to his ears and neck, and Zack threw back his head and laughed deep and full. "I'm only kidding, Cloud. We all know you're squeaky clean between the ears." Zack laughed again and reached out to ruffle Cloud's hair.

The blond had barely had time to get himself together before Zack leaned in and asked in a conspiratorial whisper, "So, is that a girlfriend we're thinking about bringing to the celebration party? Someone you dropped by in Midgar when I had my back turned?"

Cloud could feel the red seeping into his cheeks again and how his face was burning. How did Zack always manage to bring out the teenager Cloud couldn't even remember? The First just gave him a lopsided smile. "Or maybe it's a boyfriend?"

Cloud this time ducked his head to hide the even darker blush and stop the errant thoughts before they could fully form. Zack didn't laugh this time but pulled his arm tight around Cloud and tucked him into his side and set down his empty carton. It was a brotherly, friendly action, but Cloud tensed under it.

Zack ignored the blond stiffening under him and pulled him a little closer, before popping both his socked feet on the glass table, perfectly relaxed. "Don't worry about it, Spike. Most of SOLDIER is bi at least. Mako makes it hard to have a normal relationship, and trust me, when the scientists give you the little 'talk' on safe sex with mako, you won't sleep with a woman for years."

Zack's accompanying shudder wasn't able to crack a smile out of the blond, but Cloud did relax a little. "So you got nothing to worry about. Plenty of SOLDIERs have casual and long-term relationships you know."

 _Like you and Kunsel?_ was the traitorous thought, but Cloud stuffed it down. For some reason he couldn't explain he was uncomfortable with Zack being with anyone else like that, even angry if he tried to imagine it, but Cloud didn't think he felt that kind of emotion for Zack anymore. Sure, the SOLDIER was handsome and very friendly, and Cloud had certainly had a crush once, but after everything the blond had been through, well, he knew Zack more intimately than anyone else. Now he was just _Zack_.

"Don't sweat it, Spike. I don't suppose you've been up to anything here have you?"

Cloud shook his head and relaxed deeper into Zack's embrace until he was practically slumping, his legs stretched out in front of him under the table. The SOLDIER smiled down at him. "Save it. Mako gives a SOLDIER a _huge_ libido, so you'll be getting plenty of offers down the road so you can be picky. You can always crash at my place if it's too much or your roommate's getting frisky."

Zack winked at him and laughed, and Cloud smiled slightly. "You know, you make a good pillow, Cloud." Zack abruptly snuggled into Cloud's head and pretended to throw his other arm and a leg around Cloud like he was some overstuffed teddy bear. "I think I'm just going to sleep on you."

Cloud tried to shift from the strange entanglement of Zack all around him, but the SOLDIER was heavy and he wouldn't budge.

"Zack let me go."

He snored.

"Zaaaack."

Zack pretended to snort in his sleep before continuing to snore ridiculously loudly.

"Aw c'mon Zack. You're heavy."

Nothing.

"The moment I get out I'm taking that stash of strawberry shortcakes in your kitchen with me."

Zack sat up immediately. "You wouldn't Cloud!" He tried to look horrified, but his lips were twitching with the suppressed need to laugh.

Cloud put on his best poker face. "I would."

Zack tried for the panicky look, but he couldn't hold his huge smile in. Cloud managed to hold his own strict face for a full three seconds before he too smiled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some people seemed to be confused as to what "moonshine" is. Moonshine is a common term for home-distilled alcohol, especially in places where this production is illegal. (Courtesy of Wikipedia.)


	21. The Easy Part's Done

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The SOLDIER Exams have begun, and Cloud's got a plan.

General Sephiroth made no secret of his distaste for office work. During the exams, thisdisgruntlement was magnified until it became utter loathing because of the exponential increase in paperwork that landed on his desk.

Propping his elbows on the paper-covered desk he rubbed at his throbbing temples. His eyes were starting to ache from squinting at tiny print, and he dug the heels of his hands into them before pulling back. Mako seemed to do wonders for any other pain but tension headaches. Sephiroth decided he needed to work in a spar today. He'd been sitting behind this desk for the past two weeks without reprieve except for sleep, meals, and chastising Zack when he got lazy. He'd even given up going to the vending machines when they started getting low on everything—the first thing to go was Snickers of course. The exams would begin on Monday, and then he'd have a legitimate excuse to be out of the office.

But until then… There was a low knock on his door. Frustrated at the thought of more paperwork being delivered, he bit back a low groan and instead called in a quick, "Come in."

The door was shouldered open by a spiky blond head.

Sephiroth felt his previous headache drifting away as a new one came to replace it. Strife was ever a puzzle, which Sephiroth would have delighted in taking apart if he'd had the time to. Perhaps when the exams were over…

"Sir, this is from Zack." Strife held up the brown, cardboard box in his hands a little higher as though Sephiroth couldn't see it. The blond stood patiently before him, his face not showing any of the strain of holding what had to be a heavy box. In fact, Strife was perfectly polite whenever he came in for Zack. In some ways Zack's trainee was also his intern. He rarely made eye contact though, and there was something about the formality that was…detached, which bothered Sephiroth. That layer of coolness over all of Strife's interactions with him was absent when he was with Zack or amongst his friends. The General wasn't sure what that distance between them was, and he felt instinctively it was more than just rank.

"Just put it in the corner and I'll get to it later."

"He says it's urgent, sir."

"In the corner will be fine. I have plenty of 'urgent' memos that come before that." Sephiroth deliberately disregarded Zack's box, knowing the man in the next room down would be annoyed to find his delivery was being dumped for later. It was just a little reminder that sometimes people had other priorities than fun.

"Sir…"

Sephiroth wondered if Strife would back down. No doubt Zack put him up to this, but he wondered how far the blond would push the wondered if Strife thought he had the same leeway over him as Zack did, being the First's right-hand man practically. Would that make him bolder?

Strife chewed on his lip for just as second before speaking up again. _Good_. "General sir, Lieutenant-General Fair ordered me to make sure you opened it."

The formality was a little irksome, but Sephiroth had never stopped him before. The General supposed he could, but he somehow doubted Strife would heed it, even as an order. The thought cheered him up a bit as he leaned back in his seat to really look at the cadet. Strife didn't fidget, but he didn't look directly at him either, rather looking out the window behind him. He liked to see the cadet's backbone, though he wasn't sure why it manifested when it did. He didn't make eye contact, but he also continued to stubbornly fight Sephiroth's order.

Strife began to chew on his lower lip again and Sephiroth's eyes were drawn to it. He felt the slightest inclination to smile at the unconscious action, but a deeper reaction in his gut forced him to look away. He would not name it.

"Bring it here."

Strife complied and slid the box on to the table, exhaling at the weight left him. He stepped back but made no move to leave. The blond had always dismissed himself after delivering whatever it was without being asked, and the first time he'd done it the General had been a little surprised. Most Firstshad that privilege, but Seconds and below often waited for direct orders. It was another little thing Sephiroth had picked up on. He'd even mentioned it to Zack, and the First had just laughed. This time though the blond didn't leave, which probably indicated Zack had told him to stay.

The box was unmarked and taped together with Hello Kitty scotch tape, undoubtedly from Zack's desk. There was only one First who signed every form with bright-colored pens and bought Hello Kitty scotch a desk drawer he pulled out a box cutter and sliced through the thin tape. His audienceof one watched him in silence. The box immediately opened like some cardboard flower, and inside were perhaps a hundred Snickers bars.

… _So this is why the vending machine has been out._

Sephiroth calmly stared at the entire box of them for a moment, before lifting his eyes up to Strife. The blond didn't seem surprised. He'd probably put the box together considering Zack could be perfectly inept when it came to the strangest things. The man could put up any kind of camping tent there was, but had trouble wrapping presents.

"Please inform the Lieutenant General that his…gift has been received." Before Strife could move though, he added, "Wait a moment."

Standing up, he put the box in the corner of the room before retrieving another empty box from a pile of them. Sephiroth did not like clutter, but it was inevitable during the exams, and he made up one stack of paperwork, he dropped it into the box before carefully stuffing more in the sides around it. Once it was completely full, he closed the box and masking-taped it together.

Sephiroth handed it to Strife, giving the boy the slightest hint of a smile as he did. "Please also inform the Lieutenant-General that if he has enough time to raid every vending machine on the compound, then he has enough time to complete these." Turning around he crossed back to his desk but didn't sit. Now that he'd stood up he didn't want to sit back down to work again. For the briefest of moments his eyes shifted to the box of Snickers in the corner and then to the blond still standing there.

The General thought Strife might have wanted to salute when he shifted the box, but after a nervous twitch of a smile, he nodded and turned, leaving the room and walking the whole five feet to Zack's door. Sephiroth just shook his head.

_Anyone else and it would be hazing._

* * *

"Well, did he open it?"

"Yeah."

"And?"

"He said, 'If you have enough time to raid every vending machine in the compound, then you can do all this.'"

"What?! That's why I sent _you_ to get all those Snickers!"

"I know."

"Well, Cloud, have a seat. I'm going to teach you the finer points of paperwork."

"You're not serious."

"Cloud, the art of paperwork is to skim for specific words. If you see 'Scarlet', 'Hojo', anything to do with the science department in fact, rip it in half and toss it in the garbage. Now, this is Sephiroth's signature. Notice all the perfectly circular loops. If it's addressed to him, sign his name. If it's addressed to me, scribble something that has a big 'Z' in the front."

"…"

"I'm _kidding_ Cloud."

* * *

"Shinra SOLDIER cadets, the SOLDIER Examinations will begin on October eighth. Each class has a written exam that _will not_ be curved. Failing any exam can put you at a serious disadvantage for the physical examinations."

The cadets in the gym shuffled and glanced at each at that proclamation. There had to be almost all the cadets on Shinra's compound here. There were two recruitment dates, which meant two days in the year to sign up for the Cadet Program, but everyone started at the same time, and everyone ended at the same time. These exams had been long in coming, and it finally seem to hit people that all their work was building up to this point—and this was where their dreams stood the chance of failing.

Cloud was in a corner of the room with Dan and Reno. Dan, of course, looked suitably terrified, while Reno looked nonchalant. It was perfectly normal behavior for Dan and Reno to be at complete odds. Cloud didn't worry about the written exams, he was more concerned with the physical one; the one he'd failed before.

"The written examinations begin Monday and will last one week. At various intervals a bunker will be taken for mako testing. Any and all cadets who fail this automatically fail the exam and cannot retake it."

The silence in the room was deafening. This might have been announced before at some point, but the weight of the science exam was huge because it was also uncontrollable. Dan might have gulped. Cloud had known this was coming of course, but it had seemed like a distant trial, a sun on different mountains. Now it was barely days away.

"The week after the written exams marks the beginning of the physical examination. Those of you who remain will be given more information at that time. SOLDIER wishes the best of luck to you all." With those parting words, the SOLDIER First exited the gymnasium, and the room erupted in talk.

Dan immediately launched into a distressed monologue about study schedules and why he hadn't color-coded his notes, while Reno loudly remarked he might go clubbing tonight, and Cloud stayed silent. His blue eyes watched the other cadets distantly, trying to piece together records of what had happened before. It was…depressing.

Dan had been on his team, he remembered that much. He didn't quite remember how they failed or what exactly happened, except that within the first three hours they'd been ambushed somewhere tight and the whole team had gone down. Cloud's team hadn't stood a chance.

They had three days until the written exams, and no more than seven days to a mako examination. Cloud didn't remember what this entailed, not anymore. He couldn't even remember his own results. He'd passed though by the skin of teeth likely, but this time might be different.

* * *

Zack had come to cheer him up on Monday morning for the first exam, explaining that he wouldn't be around much for the rest of the week since he left in an hour to deal with more of AVALANCHE's messes. Zack never gave him any details, but he'd been erratically around when he wasn't leaving on missions. He'd stolen some of Cloud's bacon (well, what looked like bacon) and threw it away from him warning him about the food. The blond didn't dignify that with an answer.

Zack had given him a one-armed hug right there in front of everyone in the cafeteria, much to Cloud's embarrassment, before taking off with a jaunty wave. The blond had taken one look at Reno's wiggling eyebrows and dumped the rest of his breakfast.

The first class they were being tested on was theory, and in the end he made up a lot of his answers based on his own experiences. That was what the theory was based on after all, so he wasn't too worried. Despite all his calm during the test though, when he saw two SOLDIERs and a doctor were standing outside the test room he'd come pretty close to panicking. Thankfully the other boys were also stiff and nervous at the sight of the lab coat and Thirds, and Cloud was able to mix into the group while he tried to remember Tifa's meditative breathing exercises.

Their bunker was first for the mako examinations.

They were led through the labyrinth of Shinra's buildings and herded over to the medical building, a large, white structure with the typical Shinra logo pasted above the door that was the main hospital on the compound. Cloud lingered at the back of the group as they squeezed through the doors and were led to a large operating theater, before the boys were ordered to line up.

"This is the mako examination. We expect your full cooperation in this test. Results will be determined on site. Those of you that fail will join the ranks of the regiment army tomorrow morning. You will not resume the written examinations." The stiff-necked SOLDIER concluded with a short nod before standing aside for a man in a white lab coat.

Some of the boys grumbled about the importance of this test, but everyone knew if you couldn't handle mako then you could never be a SOLDIER. Shinra didn't waste the expensive chemical, so only the cadets who lasted the year of training could take it, and if they failed then that was the end of the line.

Cloud instinctively tensed as the doctor—though he might have actually been a scientist, that wasn't clear—in front of them pushed his glasses up his nose. "W-welcome cadets. All you need to do i-is stand there." He spoke quickly and stuttered,but Cloud hardly listened as his eyes focused onthe stains of chemicals on the man's gloves, and he though he could almost smell the acrid stench from fifteen feet away. He forced the bile down and focused on looking and feeling impassive.

"We'll s-simply swab you across the chest with a l-light concentration of mako. Reactions c-can take time, so if there's n-no immediate reaction, you may s-still need to come back. B-By tomorrow's results, we can a-ascertain if you qualify for s-stronger treatments as S-SOLDIERs." He pushed his glasses up one more time before turning to the nurse beside him. In her hands was a metal tray with a small pile of cotton swabs, a pair of long steel, medical tweezers, and a dish of water.

Reno shifted his weight next to Cloud, brushing up against him, and the blond flinched. He was so tense his muscles might cramp if he didn't move, except he felt frozen where he eyes were drawn to the stuttering doctor who left the room for a moment before returning. In his hand was a small beaker, holding no more than an inch of mako inside. The blond half-expected his hand to shake, but it was steady.

Cloud's eyes were drawn to it, as was everyone else's in the room. Many cadets had little experience with the dangerous substance, and in its liquid form it was at its deadliest. Cloud shuddered as the brilliant green acid sloshed in its reinforced beaker as the scientist set it down on the tray. He had no desire to be anywhere near it. He could feel the powerful urge to leave the room, and he had to force himself to stay still and look unmoved.

"I-If you would kindly remove all clothing on the torso. T-That way this c-can be done quickly." The boys removed their shirts silently, tossing them down on the theater seating behind them quickly. Cloud could feel his nipples pinch in the air conditioning and his own nervousness. Reno's stomach was clenched tight, the bottom of his ribcage just barely visible as he sucked in his stomach to ground himself. Dan twitched on Reno's other side, the muscles in his arm spasming from being held too tight. Cloud could feel beads of sweat slide down the back of his neck.

Uncapping the top of the beaker, the doctor took the forceps and carefully picked up a cotton ball, heedful not to squeeze it too tight. With practiced ease, he dipped it into the beaker, barely letting it brush the mako though it soaked it up quickly, and began to glow faint neon green. The sight was enough to make Cloud's vision blur black like he was going to faint for a second.

The doctor had to act quickly; otherwise the mako would consume the whole cotton ball. With efficiency, he swiped the mako-covered end of the cotton ball just above the first boy's nipples. Without even looking for a reaction he did the same to the second.

Neither boy moved at first, and Cloud didn't dare glance down at them. His eyes were fixed on the beaker of mako. The doctor took up another cotton ball and moved down the line quickly, the discarded cotton balls slowly filling up the water dish. As he got to the end of the line, he first swabbed Dan and then Reno. Cloud could barely see Dan twitching out of the corner of his eye, and Reno had his lower lip tightly held between his teeth, obviously stifling any reaction.

Everything narrowed down for Cloud as soon as the scientist went for another ball. He had no idea what might happen, but he knew what it felt like to get even a little liquid mako on your skin. There would be a burning sensation, the edges would turn icy cold, and his nostrils would become raw from breathing in the fumes after a couple minutes. Cloud hoped that would be the extent of it, but his gut clenched at the thought of any of it going badly. What if this caused an imbalance in him? Would he mutate?

The doctor stepped up before Cloud, and the blond tried to relax his hands enough to unclench his fists. He could feel sweat dribble down his back, but he kept his expression blank and tried to do the same for his mind as the doctor dipped the cotton ball into the mako and drew the forceps up, before cutting a smooth line of green across his chest.

* * *

Tseng stared at the stubborn looking blond boy in the picture. His profile was unremarkable, his grades had shot up about midway through the year, and though it was impressive to be trained by a First Class SOLDIER, Tseng still wasn't really seeing it.

Reno said _Cloud_ had told him. And considering this was the redhead's friend, he had been the obvious answer. However, Strife didn't seem like the sort of person who would know that kind of information. After all, he'd grown up far from Midgar, in a tiny village Tseng was sure he'd never been to before, and Tseng seriously doubted anyone could be subtle with that kind of hair.

So had Reno lied? No, Tseng was fairly sure he'd been sincere. Perhaps it was _through_ Strife he'd heard about the guns? Reno was more than just a slum rat after all. He was a _shrewd_ one, and that could be a volatile combination.

Perhaps Cloud was not referencing his friend at all, but a codename for something or someone else? That would make Strife an incredibly convenient cover, but it wasn't impossible. Though anyone who checked up on Strife with half a brain would find nothing. Other than the boy's seemingly miraculous hidden ability that Fair had spotted _,_ Strife was unexceptional.

…But unexceptional wasn't really Reno's style. He picked at puzzles compulsively, and he didn't befriend people who couldn't be useful, Tseng knew, taking a risk for a big prize. After all, their first meeting had been exactly that. Tseng, looking like a high executive in his dark blue suit, had actually been pick-pocketed by the scamp. In a hallway too! Of course, Reno hadn't gotten three steps before Tseng had him by the collar, but the redhead was his usual cocky self, telling him he'd only be "relieving him of the weight of his wallet". The boy hadn't realized at first he was a Turk, but he'd faltered a bit on his cocky attitude when he'd been dragged down the hall and to the Turk's offices. Tseng knew his department had a nasty reputation in the slums, and he cultivated it.

That had been the beginning of their absurd relationship, and Tseng liked to think he had the slippery Reno pretty much pegged down. Still… unless there was anything to indicate "Cloud" was actually a codename, Tseng would keep his eye on the blond. With the exams it wouldn't be difficult to watch the boy in action, though he'd be in a controlled environment. Maybe even if Strife didn't drop a clue, then Reno would.

* * *

Cloud lay on his bed and contemplated what his body was telling him: he could feel a slow burn aching across the swab mark; the green coloration was long gone. His skin was red now though, irritated and sensitive to touch. The edges, as expected, felt icy cold. He'd anticipated being in more pain, but it felt like a serious rug-burn with some salt dashed on it, nothing he couldn't easily block out.

The other boys hadn't faired quite as well. Dan's hands had kept wandering up to his bare chest, flittering around the burn without touching. He had whimpered, and even Reno hadn't said a word aboutthe lack of manliness at handling the pain. The redhead had bit his lip and calmly told the doctor when he came around that he was "fuckin' fine". The crack in his voice gave him away.

Mako burns weren't the kind of ache most people experienced. It was like the initial shock and startling burst of pain of a smashed toe, except that burst of pain kept throbbing the way a broken arm did, and it didn't let up for a long time. This was unrefined mako burning through layers of skin and irritating every nerve it could reach. SOLDIERs were injected with treated mako that had been refined, but if you couldn't handle the raw stuff then injecting any form of mako straight into the bloodstream would be deadly—for you and possibly for anyone around you if you mutated.

It didn't take long to get a taste of mako treatment gone badly. Acker, the first boy in line, collapsed roughly two minutes after exposure. His mako streak had begun to swell, and the doctor immediately ordered him to a bed and an IV. He'd failed.

After waiting another ten minutes without further reaction, whether through the actual burn or by breathing it in, they were sent back to the bunker. The doctor had called out for them to return immediately should something change, and that the feeling should dwindle by curfew. They'd have to return tomorrow morning so the scientist could see if there were any further changes or results.

Reno and the others tried to put their shirts back on as Cloud walked out carrying his, and the shouts of pain at irritating the incredibly sensitive skin couldn't pull the blond back from where his mind wandered. The familiar burn of mako had sent too many gruesome and unpleasant memories back into the forefront of Cloud's mind, and all he wanted to do was lay down and try to distract himself from the pain.

Cloud knew that being a SOLDIER would mean real mako treatments. It would mean syringes of liquid, fire licking up his veins, and Hojo looming down on him. _It was worth it,_ he told himself as he gritted his teeth as another wave of pain rippled across the stain on his chest when the wind from outside hit it, _everything is worth it._

* * *

Tseng tapped his chin thoughtfully as he sat at the head of the roundtable. On his right was Rude, currently without a partner, and a couple other older faces, along with a handful of others who were also new blood.

The Turks were always few in number but this year had not been a good year for them. One of their veterans had been killed by AVALANCHE, and another had disappeared after an assignment on the North Continent. That was actually a fairly frequent incidence—most attributed it to death and didn't ask questions.

They also didn't gather together like this all that often, and even then two were out on assignment—one would likely not come back, that was intentional—and Veld was in his office as he'd taken to doing of late. He was letting his second, Tseng, run the meeting. Tseng was still looking into why exactly, but if people though Tseng was paranoid, then they'd never compared him to his superior.

"Turks, those of you who have been members for longer than two months are allowed to nominate and sponsor a cadet to join. Does anyone want to start?"

There was silence for a moment before Rude's hand rose.

Tseng's eyebrow shot up. "Rude?" He couldn't quite keep the skepticism out of his voice. Rude, normally so taciturn, had never nominated anyone in his six years here. In fact, it wasn't even that common to nominate anyone, since most Turk trainees were chosen by consensus, but it happened sometimes. Tseng was curious to know who had caught the man's eye.

"I would like to sponsor Cadet Reno to be a Turk."

Tseng's mouth tightened. The other Turks noticed the tension but wisely didn't say anything. Rude looked as placid as ever. His superior's clear doubt didn't seem to faze him at all.

"Why?"

Rude paused a moment to survey Tseng but remained silent.

"You are aware that he would most likely be your new partner?" Tseng leaned back in his chair as he regained some of his composure. No one was quite sure why Tseng disliked Reno except Rude, and nobody dared to ask.

"…"

Tseng sighed. "Despite his immaturity, if you sponsor him I cannot stop you." He twirled his pen around his fingers for a second before looking back up at Rude. "Do you understand?"

"…"

The files on Reno were pulled up, and the Turks around the table read through the meager information.

"He looks fine," one commented.

"He's from the slums," said another.

"Reminds me of that guy with the two guns before, what was his name?"

"Starts with an R. The one who—"

Reno was clearly an acceptable choice to the other Turks, that much was obvious, and Tseng couldn't say he wasn't surprised, though Rude nominated him did catch him off guard. Reno certainly had a lot of the qualities of the Turks, even if he was messy, obnoxious, and too easily broken by sexual advances. Half the work of the Turks though was molding their trainees—if they didn't die—and Tseng couldn't help thinking he might help push Reno along.

* * *

"Do you think we can switch teams?"

"I hope that guy's not on my team."

"You think they'll give us something besides a gun?"

"I heard you have to kill three people to pass."

Even though it was eight a.m. on a Monday morning and all the cadets were crammed into the cafeteria, there was the constant thrum of talk. Team assignments were to be given out, and everyone was excited. They had to wait nearly half an hour as the buzz built up before a Second Class SOLDIER finally walked in and was almost immediately swarmed. In his hand was a long sheet of paper that had the groups and details for the physical exam.

"Do you think we'll get lucky, Cloud?" Dan's eager voice cut through the noise around them as the boy turned to three of them were sitting at their usual table on the far side, Cloud thinking about how he'd make things work out, whether he got a good team or not. Reno sometimes left to go talk to someone before coming back to share whatever he heard, while Dan kept checking the door and then the SOLDIER to see if an announcement would be coming shortly.

Cloud didn't answer Dan's questions, but Reno did,scoffing at the other cadet. "You make your own luck."

A bunch of Thirds waiting on the side of the room clapped their hands and shouted to get the group of cadets to calm down. Once everyone was seated before them, they sat back down at their table and let the Second come forward.

He was a rough looking man, tall with big shoulders not unlike Barret, and his voice boomed out across the room. "Cadets! Today marks the first day of the physical examination of the SOLDIER Exam. There are eight-five participants this year, fifty-five cadets and thirty regulation soldiers."

Murmuring broke out at the mention of army members coming back for a trial. Those who failed the SOLDIER exams were required to join the army for three years. If they hadn't failed the mako exam, then after two years they were offered a second chance at the exams. However, if they failed again they had another three years added to their service. It was a gamble, though clearly a popular one if thirty men were trying again. Cloud hadn't made it through a year as a regulation soldier.

"There will be seventeen teams, each with five members. The goal of the test is to last for two weeks under hostile conditions. Food, water, and ammunition will be hidden throughout the building. You will be required to outlast and outwit the other teams if you have any hope of surviving. You will be judged not only on your methods of survival, but on your application of all you've been taught, and your teamwork."

Immediately people starting talking in hushed voices, wondering just what the SOLDIER meant by "surviving". Cloud was characteristically silent, letting even Reno wonder aloud as to the rules of the game. The blond already knew what to expect. He had been tempted all week during the written exams to share some of his knowledge with Reno, but always it had come down to an explanation he didn't have. After what had happened with Tseng's guns, Cloud waited and held his tongue.

"The rules are as follows: Each team will be given color-coded armbands to signify their team. The weapons you will be using are these," One of the troopers next to the SOLDIER lifted up an unfamiliar gun. It was long and thin like a military rifle, except the barrel was particularly elongated. It wasn't like the guns they'd been training with. "This is your weapon. Only two of these will be given to each team. More of these will be hidden throughout the area," the SOLDIER explained.

"This is your ammunition. It holds eight rounds." The other trooper now held up what looked like an ordinary magazine, though Cloud knew it was actually thinner and lighter than a regular cartridge because there weren't regular bullets in there. The cadets here were expecting to be given the same rubber pellets they practiced with, however that wasn't the case. Paintballs were cheaper, left clear marks where someone was hit, and were less dangerous for head or neck hits. Hence, they were perfect for a controlled battle situation like the exam.

The SOLDIER didn't cough to regain attention, just angrily glared out at the crowd until their voices dimmed and finally quieted. "The examination will be monitored through cameras and a regular sweep made by personnel. You are free to attack as you would in a real battle. Killing all your opponents, however, may not be to your advantage. Think wisely."

Other than a couple quiet whispers, the room remained silent.

"When I announce your group, you will sit at a table together, beginning with the table in the farthest corner and moving right across the room before starting on the next row. Do not attempt to switch groups or sabotage another team before the official start of the exam, or you will be penalized." Before anyone could speak, the SOLDIER started barking orders at the troopers by his side. They cleared the back row tables of the cafeteria and stood at attention.

"Team 1: Dent, Williams, Gris, Moxley, and Wylie. Team 2…"

As the names were called, boys shuffled off to their designated tables, trying to act tough as they were separated from their friends and seated with total strangers. Reno was called up with Team 6, sneering at Dan and waving briefly at Cloud before cockily walking off. Cloud nodded to him as he left. Reno's teammates didn't seem overly enthused to see him. Two of them looked like friends and they clearly saw Reno as a threat rather than a teammate. Cloud looked over the teams called so far, faces vaguely familiar from class and practice, but Reno, for some reason, seemed out of place. The blond continued to stare, trying to think of what was wrong. There was Reno's team for the exam, the paintball he probably would have loved, getting spectacularly drunk once he passed—

No… Cloud couldn't recall seeing Reno in the exam at all, not even in the group that failed. Reno had been in his bunker, so he must have been at the mako exam at least. As Cloud dredged up the memories though, full of holes as they were, he could still see his team members, the army guy and Dan, and he remembered Maxwell being on a tough team and a handful of others, but Reno and his bright hair was missing.

Had the Turks picked him up already? If that was true, then Cloud may have really changed Reno's future. He and Reno _were_ together quite often, and Reno had subtly changed in the last months as they'd had gotten closer, so it couldn't be that much of a jump to imagine Cloud had that kind of influence. He might have unintentionally headed off incidents where Reno would have caught the eye of a Turk, or perhaps he'd even curbed Reno's attitude enough to stay under the radar.

He thought furiously through the implications of what he'd just realized, only half listening for his name. If Reno was taking the exam, then that meant Cloud had changed something. How had Reno been picked for the Turks the first time? Cloud had no idea, but he stared at the redhead across the room wondering how this would change his known future.

The blond rubbed his knuckles over his eyes and took a deep breath. This didn't mean Reno couldn't be a Turk. It would just be delayed. The redhead was _made_ for the Turks; everyone knew that, but the blond still couldn't help but fear that he'd unknowingly done something irreversible.

"Team 10: Strife, Megarian, Gavish, Tamboia, and Biegel."

Dan immediately jumped up, turning to Cloud with his hands clutched over his heart in a very girlish gesture. "We're on the same team, Cloud! Can you believe our luck?" Letting the boy babble on, Cloud grunted and crossed the room to where one boy was already sitting. He was smiling at them as they approached.

As Dan and Cloud sat, the other spoke. "I'm Aaron, nice to meet you. I've seen the both of you around." The purple-haired boy offered his hand, which Dan took immediately.

"I'm Dan, and this is Cloud." Dan was a perfect gentleman, introducing them both, and Aaron offered Cloud his hand too. The blond shook it tightly once and quickly retracted. Dan seemed to have already taken a shine to Aaron, who was certainly more cordial than most of the boys here. "We're actually from the same bunker. Isn't that lucky?"

Aaron agreed, and as the two started talking, Cloud noted only one other boy joined them. He wore his military outfit loosely, pants too low so his boxers could be seen when he was sitting, his jacket unbuttoned and shirt un-tucked. His face was red from acne, and he had a thin white scar along the top of his hairline of his temple. Cloud had a distinct image of a much more immature Reno. They held themselves the same way, with an air of arrogance born of tough lives.

"Oh, you must be Megarian or Biegel." Aaron turned to the boy now, just noticing him sitting here, and offered his hand again. The other cadet crossed his arms on the table and turned his face away.

Not one to be put-off by blatant rudeness, Aaron resumed his conversation with Dan and occasionally asked questions of the other who refused to acknowledge any of them. Cloud wondered briefly if the guy would be a problem, but dismissed it. He'd led unrulier people than a teenager; he could handle him.

The blond surveyed the rest of the room as Dan and Aaron talked, looking at who was on what team. He didn't recognize any of the members of Reno's team, and most of the other teams seemed to be an even distribution of skills to Cloud's knowledge. He had been sure they were broken up based on scores, though Cloud was sure he'd done better this time around. Perhaps Zack had fiddled with it—in which case Cloud might have to mention how favoritism wouldn't help him. Had the SOLDIER done that before to land him on a better team even though it hadn't helped?

Megarian, their last member, was actually in the army, which was why he wasn't there, as Cloud remembered. The SOLDIER would probably explain that as soon as people finished getting acquainted with each other. Biegel, the surly one at the end of the table, Cloud barely remembered at all. Hopefully that meant the boy would keep his head down or fail quickly.

"Cadets! Now that you have found your teams, some of you might find that you are missing one person. If you are a four-man team here, it means your last member is a regulation army member. They will join us at the site of the exam. You have one hour now to prepare. You are allowed to bring one bag, which will be examined before you leave. It must be small enough to carry as a pack, and certain objects are forbidden: this includes guns, certain kinds of food, and bombs. If you want to see a complete list, there is one in each of your halls. Be back here in one hour!"

Dan and Cloud rose with the other boys, merging into one loud group as they headed back to the bunkers. Reno was already there by the time they reached their room. It hadn't exactly been cozy, but missing three people, now four with Acker gone to the regulation army, it was even barer. Everyone knew they wouldn't be coming back here for more than to pack up the last of their stuff—whether to bring it to the new SOLDIER Third's apartments or the army barracks.

Cloud packed extra water skeins, his small knife (hiding the larger one on himself), a permanent marker, and any manner of paraphernalia he could think of that might be useful. He knew not to over-pack because he would need the space for things they picked up and the like. Cloud had to remind Dan of the same though. The boy seemed insistent that he would really needed a book in case he got bored, a box of tissues in case someone got a cold, and even toilet paper. After finally helping Dan cut ten pounds off his bag, he and Cloud were the last to leave their bunker.

Back in the cafeteria, they were told to rejoin their group. Aaron had over-packed in the end, and Biegel seemed to have no bag on him at all. The SOLDIER called for attention, and reminding them to stick to their teammates, they were led out the door in lines.

A ride in a private train car and a short walk through one of the better slums (rotten wood and thin metal houses instead of ones made of garbage), they were led into a chained-in area that announced itself as Shinra property. There were spots like this dotting Lower Midgar, places reserved for SOLDIER training, prototype testing, and various Science Department-related activities. It looked like this area was uninhabited except for the occasional monster, though the large crowd and the floodlights had scared them all off.

It must have been a service sector at some point, because all the buildings were multi-story offices with signs out front for long-gone businesses in hardware, fuel, and other products. Off to the side and a ways down was the medical station, and beyond that was another building all lit up that Cloud presumed was where the exam was monitored.

The building in front of them was taller than its neighbors by a good ten stories, and had been fixed up recently, probably so it wouldn't immediately collapse when the cadets got inside. In front of it already waiting for them was another large group of people, all dressed in army fatigues. They eyed the cadets in an unfriendly way, probably unhappy to be mixed in with the rookies.

"Attention!" The soldiers automatically stood at attention, though many of the cadets did not immediately react. The SOLDIER didn't appear to care any which way. "This building before you was the headquarters of an electric company from a time before Shinra had risen to power. It has eighteen floors, so each team will be placed on a floor."

Cloud stared up at the looming structure, getting a sudden wave of déjà vu. He'd briefly wandered its halls sweating and nervous, unknowingly being stalked. He'd hardly been inside for three hours, led by Megarian the solider if he remembered correctly, before he'd been hit in the back of the head from four feet away—almost point-blank range. He'd been woozy, but he must have been shot a second time or fallen because he'd come-to inside the makeshift hospital outside the building, "killed" in combat and therefore failed.

Some more shouted orders from the organizing SOLDIERs had the teams formed into a line by number. Megarian joined them then, and no one missed the look Biegel threw at him. It was clearly resenting, and when Biegel looked away in the direction of Aaron, the boy flashed him a ridiculously flirty look, knowing it would only upset the other cadet. Biegel sneered at him uncomfortably. Cloud took it all in, aware that this wasn't a good start for teamwork points.

Megarian was a husky young man, with stubble he probably shouldn't have had in the army, and wavy dark hair that was a tad longer than army regulation. He towered over Dan, though when Aaron offered his hand he gave him a warm shake.

They shuffled forward, Cloud at the front of their group. They were given five lime green armbands, the symbol of their team. Dan wanted to make a team name, but when nobody jumped at it he quieted. Aaron tied his armband around his neck, almost like a matador. Biegel shoved his around his wrist and pulled his jacket sleeve down to hide it. Cloud and Megarian tied theirs around their upper arms, and after a moment Dan did the same.

They grouped together as they waited to be called inside to be placed on a floor. Cloud observed the other teams around them, noting the royal blue color of Reno's team, and that Maxwell's orange-colored team seemed to be entirely composed of bullies.

"I'm John. You?"

Megarian was standing by Cloud, looking up at the building. "Cloud."

The soldier glanced down at him briefly. "The last time I took this, people fought dirty."

"People fight dirty in war. This may be a mock-war, but it's still war." Cloud's serious tone must have caught Megarian off-guard because the man didn't answer right away.

"I agree." He said finally.

Cloud nodded and didn't speak after that. He'd get along with Megarian just fine.

It was only a couple minutes later before they were called. They're bags were checked for contraband, then an army trooper led them into the building and down a couple of twisting hallways before opening the door to a room. It was a generic office, with dusty broken desks, a couple filing cabinets, and two ancient computers. "This is where you will be starting the exam from. Do not leave this room before the whistle blows or you will be penalized."

Nodding, Cloud gave the room a brief scan as he walked in. This was just like last time; his team had gotten the first floor. Only this time, Cloud knew their base camp wouldn't be here. Anyone who tried to go through the floors systemically would start here, so they'd be easy pickings. He knew what they needed to do, and what kind of tactics would be best to both survive, and show the proctors what they could do.

Dan, Aaron, and Megarian stopped as Cloud stood in the center of fairly large room. Biegel looked disinterested as he stood off to the side.

"Team 10,"Cloud began,"This is our strategy…"


	22. Getting a Leg Up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cloud puts his plan in action.

"This is idiotic." Biegel huffed, crossing his arms and looking away like a moody child. Cloud had easily ignored his stream of negative commentary throughout the explanation, but Dan hadn't been so mature about it.

"If that's all you have to say, then keep your mouth shut!"

"Dan." At Cloud's voice, Dan relaxed slightly, eyes still locked on Biegel.

He pouted though as he turned to Cloud. "It's not like he has to be here. He can just-"

"No. He knows the plan, so he's going along with it no matter what," John cut in.

"We could just tie him up and leave him in a back room. Maybe under a desk?" Aaron suggested, side-eying Biegel who cursed him loudly for the idea.

Cloud watched his team bicker as he sat on a desk. They were in the room the proctor had left them in on the ground floor. It was barren, with just the skeleton of what an office building needed: desks and cubicles, filing cabinets and empty trash bins. Cloud was seated on top of the manager's desk, with John leaning on the wall of a cubicle while Aaron manned the chair. Dan had commandeered another chair, and Biegel had taken to brooding across the aisle from them.

He had laid out a plan he had hammered out in his head for weeks now, and it had a good reception amongst the group, even John agreeing that it could work even if it was certainly unorthodox _._ Then Beigel had to open his mouth, and things had gone sour.

"They'll fail us for destroying property, and I'm not failing for something as dumb as that."

"That's the third time you've said that, and like I said before," Aaron swiveled in his chair to give the boy a sardonic grin. "They want us to wage a mock war here. Destruction of the building is inevitable. Cloud's idea is just…intentional destruction."

"There's no way I'm following this."

John pitched in now. "This is the military. It's not up for vote. You follow the leader's orders and don't ask questions."

Biegel scoffed, "He isn't my XO."

They were wasting precious time argueing about this, and as far as Cloud was concerned he was going forward with the plan, Biegil along for the ride or not. "You can stay and work with the rest of the team, or you can leave and suffer the consequences," he interrupted, laying down an ultimatum. Everyone waited for Biegel's response, but Cloud already sensed which way Beigel was going to turn. He fingered his gun.

"…I'm leaving."

The responses from the others fell on deaf ears as Biegel pushed off the wall and headed down the aisle, his exposed back to the group. Cloud hoisted up his gun and cocked it, barely even glancing into the sight before firing a single shot. The bright blue paint ball splattered against the center of Biegel's back, knocking him to the floor with a shout. Cloud pulled back the gun, ignoring the shocked reactions of his teammates.

"In war, defectors are executed if caught to prevent secrets, strategies, and troop movements from reaching the enemy." Cloud relaxed his grip on the gun and strode over to Beigel's sputtering body that was just beginning to sit up. "You've failed."

Cloud turned back to the group that was staring at him. Dan looked shocked, Aaron impressed, and John a little of both.

"W-what are you going to do with him?"

Cloud pointed out the camera in the corner of the room to Dan. "They'll come and collect him."

* * *

Reno hated his team.

Riley and Mark were two boys who came from a rather classy neighborhood outside Junon. They'd joined the military because they'd been useless anywhere else, and only proved to be more useless as time went by. Reno had a basic profile of all the cadets in his year, and these two had messed with people constantly, though perhapsunfortunately they hadn't messed with the kind that would kill them for it. Yet. Reno had been ready to introduce them to some of those people within the first minute of meeting them.

Stojan was the self-proclaimed leader of Team 6. He came from a military family and had been spoiled rotten all his life. He expected to fly up the ranks because his father had been a colonel, and he was a complete bastard. Stojan had proudly claimed his father was known for his fashionable military boots—something about buttons or black-on-black strips, the redhead didn't understand or care. Reno was sorely tempted to point out that being known for your designer boots as a colonel was probably not something to be proud of. Stojan was, as far as Reno was concerned, a stuck up twit who looked like the type to run at the first sign of trouble.

It was people like these guys that really pissed Reno off. They'd lived on leather couches all their lives and thought they were better than he was or that they knew more than Reno. So what if they'd gone to the Golden Saucer and toured around occupied Wutai? They were in the military—those things weren't useful. Had they ever had to duck and run while under fireReno had? Ever had to lie and cheat and make someone bleed 'til the told they truth? Reno had. Bastards had no idea what real life was like.

It just worked him up more and more from the moment he'd sat down at the table. The first word out of Mark's mouth had been "slum rat" and it had all just gone downhill from there. That term had been practically polite to the other ones they knew, though Reno had heard worse, not that it still didn't totally piss him off.

They were barely into the exam and Reno had already nearly broken Stojan's nose, given Mark a black eye, had his lip split when Riley hit him with a cheap shot, and ripped the cuff and several buttons off his shirt. He'd had to fix it with safety pins later so it didn't keep gaping open.

They were on the third floor, sitting in the hallway between the elevators and the stairs, waiting for someone to come and attack them. Stojan seemed to think a good strategy was to lay in wait around the corner, peek around if they heard something, and fire when they saw someone. Reno thought he was a dumbest asshole in the exam.

The other cadets of his team were on their side of the hallway trying to come up with a long-term plan to win. So far all their ideas were ludicrously farfetched, and Reno's side commentary wasn't helping.

"What about the cameras," Mark said, glancing deliberately up at the one in the far corner watching them. Reno had another in his sights, wondering if he might creep out the SOLDIER watching it if he stared hard enough. He was that bored.

"Maybe we could shoot all of them?"

"It'd be a waste of ammo, Riley. Come on, Planet knows how many there are. Probably can see every team."

If Reno kept rolling his eyes this hard he'd give himself a headache. "You wouldn't be able to hit the camera since your aim's so bad. Might as well leave them and wait for someone to try hacking them."

He was being perfectly sarcastic. Reno wasn't stupid; he knew SOLDIER wouldn't leave around any way to access the cameras. Not to mention, breaking into their system would be like an act of war against them, not the other teams.

Clearly, Reno's logic forgot to take into account Stojan, Riley, and Mark's combined idiocy. If any three people could talk themselves into doing something ridiculous, it would be them.

"Yo, riffraff, what did you say?"

Reno flipped Mark the finger without turning. He was a good ten feet away from the others and that was as close as he was getting. He heard some muttered voices from where they were sitting, and then the rustling of clothes and shoes as someone stood up. From the weight of the footsteps, Reno had to guess it was Riley, the largest boy of the group.

He could feel him looming over his seated position against the wall, his shadow thrown off to the side by the fluorescent lighting. Reno gripped the knife resting innocently in his lap.

"Did you say we could hack the cameras, arps?"

Reno didn't budge, knowing what would come next.

Riley wrapped one burly hand around his arm, exposing the soft armpit as he did so. Reno slammed the blunt end of his knife up and into the unguarded area, causing Riley to let go with a shout of pain.

"Don't touch me," Reno said in a dark tone, pushing away the kneeling cadet holding his arm protectively to his chest.

Mark was on his feet and coming towards him as Reno stood. "You ass scum!" He charged straight at Reno, who ducked down at the last second and swiped the legs out from under Mark. The boy went down hard on his tailbone and didn't get the chance to sit up before Reno was crouched on top of him, one foot digging into the cadet's knee to hold him down.

"Look little boy, you've been saying shit about me and the other half of Midgar but you grew up in a nice, safe neighborhood with dogs, fences, and police, and I suggest you go back there. Because this town? This is where I grew up, and things are a little different here. Your dog gets eaten when you're hungry, the fences are hotwired with electricity, and the police shoot to kill. So why don't you take the golden spoon out of your mouth and shove it up your ass?" Reno dug the knife into the boy's throat one more time just to hear him whimper before standing up and casually brushing himself off.

Stojan stood, his face turning puce in his anger. "Guttersnipe, cock-sucking, bastard! Get the fuck out of here! We don't need you! We'll leave your ass out to dry and see how long you last!"

Reno shrugged as he let go of Mark, who had a fine sheen of sweat dotting his brow. As he thought, the kids didn't hold up under pressure. "Your funeral."

When he walked past Stojan to reach the stairs, the boy deliberately shoved the butt of his gun into Reno's stomach, no doubt trying to hurt him. Reno grabbed the butt of the gun before he could complete the motion, and shoved the barrel of it back into Stojan's soft stomach, causing the boy to double over. He'd picked that one up from Cloud. "Don't underestimate me. I've killed for less."

Reno grinned as he turned his back on them and headed down the stairs. That had felt good, but he couldn't believe fops like those kids actually existed.

He headed down the stairs, trying to think of where he could go now. He'd been thankfully ousted from his team, so he would need a safe place to hold out in until he could find a splintered group to join up with or some other way to make it through this exam on his own. Nothing he couldn't handle.

Reno went all the way down to the first floor, taking care to move quietly on the stairs so he wouldn't alert any other stupid teams hoping to ambush people in the stairwell. Once he made it down there, he located the guardroom not far from the main entrance and slipped inside. There were double doors, one made of bulletproof glass and the other a heavy metal, and a swivel chair seated before several cracked and splintered monitors. The keyboards were trashed, wiring pulled out of the computers and even the walls.

Reno paused as he saw this, but when he realized what the damage to the room was, he started to laugh. If this little guardroom with three monitors were smashed, then how badly destroyed would the main security room be? Stojan, Riley, and Mark were screwed. And they deserved it far as he was concerned.

Reno opened the thick metal door leading back into the hallway, deciding a little scouting around would be best before settling in for a time. He had just touched the door when he heard voices around the corner. The redhead ducked back down into the room, peeking out the glass window to see which team it was.

Cloud, much to Reno's shock, came around the corner, talking swiftly to his group in a low voice. Reno couldn't hear him through the bulletproof glass, but Cloud was outlining the details of the plan now that everyone was on board, and so far there was a mixture of excitement and nervousness in the group. It was probably a little extreme, but Cloud knew that the ante would just keep rising over the next two weeks, so they needed to start out strong and with a major advantage. Not to mention, after all the things Cloud had seen, unconventional ideas were often the best. He was just about to walk past the guard booth when the door opened and Reno stepped out.

Cloud's gun whipped up so fast it was a blur. John jumped back several paces to give him space, while Dan let out a shout and Aaron covered his heart with his hand when he realized it was Reno.

"Yo, Cloud."

Cloud only lowered his gun slightly. "Reno. What are you doing here?"

Reno smirked. "You'll never guess what my team's planning to do."

* * *

Team 10, with their newest member Reno, stood in front of the rightmost elevator, Cloud positioned at the front. The building had two elevators and luckily both seemed to be on the first floor still. No cadet team was quite stupid enough to risk giving their position away with the dinging of the door opening—at least not yet it seemed.

"I'll climb up to the roof of the elevator," Cloud said, indicating the doors. "When I stamp my foot, that's the sign to move up to the seventeenth floor; _not_ the eighteenth. The elevator should move slow enough that I can do it without having to stop at every floor."

"Why don't you just drop one?It would save time." John turned completely around to look at the redhead, who had a cocky look on his face. He'd only just been given the barebones of Cloud's plan. "We only need one elevator, right? Why not stop anyone from using the other one? It shouldn't be that hard to break it."

"You're kidding, right?" Dan sputtered, looking positively horrified.

"Drop what's gotta be a five-thousand pound elevator seventeen stories? We could do serious damage to the building," Aaron said, looking uncharacteristically serious.

"And how would you break the cables? Those things hold thousands of pounds and they're probably some kind of steel," pointed out John. "They're made to _not_ be broken." Everyone was looking skeptically at Reno.

The redhead waved away their concerns though. "Look, snap or unwind the cables and the elevator'll drop and hit the ground, probably just damage the basement-"

"-Which is where the foundation of the building is!" Dan interjected.

"Right, right. But there's no one down there. We all saw the doors to the stairs down to the basement, and those suckers were welded shut."

"Why can't we just take the elevator down to the basement?" Aaron bemoaned.

"Because SOLDIER wouldn't allow the elevator to go to that floor if they blocked the stairs. We have to fix the elevator to go down there first." Cloud turned to Reno. "But dropping the other elevator would be faster. Are you willing to do it?"

"Sure." Reno grinned.

"I'll go with him," Aaron piped up suddenly. "I'll stay inside the cab until we drop it so no one gets in it."

Cloud nodded. "Right. Reno, you'll have to be able to jump off onto the top of our elevator or you'll drop with it." He shot both Reno and Aaron a serious look before he hit the button for the elevators.

"Sure thing, Captain," Reno mocked with an accompanying salute.

* * *

Tseng leaned against the belly of one of the smaller airships and stared out the open hangar door at the hazy desert horizon. The heady smell of fuel, metal, grease, and paint hung all around the cavernous building. It was probably as toxic as the drug dens under the plate, but Tseng couldn't bring himself to care. He liked the view of the sky out the open end of the hangar, and the solitude he could get here. With the air and space programs shrinking with every budget meeting, the hangar had grown to be a place he frequented more and more.

He was here today thinking about a number of things, mostly Reno, the implications of what he'd said, and best of all, how to deal with the rascal. Reno had been cleverer than he'd guessed, and the cadet had bought himself much needed time with the Strife-ploy. Now that he was in the exams he was out of touch for a while, but Tseng had his lead now.

"Cloud," he muttered, a little annoyed. Reno had known using that word would throw Tseng right into Strife's direction, and he'd wasted valuable time digging up nothing on the blond cadet. Strife had been a suitable distraction with his own complicated situation and history, but not the kind of material with information of private, highly guarded firearms.

Tseng wasn't sure if Reno was just a really good liar or he was hoping Tseng would find something on Cloud the redhead hadn't found. Neither option told Tseng anything though about Reno's information, except that the Turks should be keeping an eye on both cadets—but mostly Reno because Strife would be answering to SOLIDER soon. Tseng wasn't so worried about the quirks in Cloud Strife's recent file; the General would sort that out soon enough he knew.

In the end, the only thing Tseng had achieved was getting Reno's illegal alcohol-making buddies locked up. Tseng had sent some of his newer Turks down into Sector 2 after tracing the moonshine from the cadet barracks, only to hit a jackpot in terms of illegal alcohol, drugs and the stolen ultraviolet lights to grow them, along with a weapons cache for a gang. Pity he hadn't been able to tell Reno that before the exams started.

Tseng straightened as he was reminded of Rude's nomination at the thought of the exams. It irritated him that Rude would do that, but there wasn't much he could do. His current position as second to the head of the Turks was still relatively new, and he didn't want to jeopardize it by making himself look bothered by a mere cadet, and therefore weak. He'd just have to deal with Reno a little longer, and then the boy would take the Turk trials. While Tseng thought Reno had a lot of potential in some Turk areas, the department only needed the best, most rounded stealth and undercover soldiers—and Tseng wasn't so sure Reno was up to that.

He dusted off his suit; the private airship he had been leaning against for more than an hour was hardly the cleanest, and he needed to get back. He didn't let any emotions follow on the heels of thoughts of Reno's pending Turk trials, nor did Tseng let his temporary frustration with the gun situation sink any deeper. He had a department to essentially run, and a meeting with the Science Department he couldn't procrastinate any longer. If there was one department even the Turks were reluctant to work with, it was Hojo's.

* * *

Cloud pulled himself through the top hatch of the elevator car and hoisted himself on to the roof. It was uneven, with steel plating and crisscrossing beams to hold the heavy car steady. He found his footing quickly though with the aid of a flashlight John had in his mouth as the soldier pulled himself through.

The elevator shaft was eerily dark. Cloud could sense the expanse of space above him and could vaguely make out the cab next to his elevator and the steel cable that held it up. There were girders all around him and four sets of rails rising in the abyss. Below he knew there would be a counterweight as heavy as the elevator that would fall perhaps a story when the other car was dropped.

John situated himself by Cloud, reaching out to tentatively touch his shoulder. There wasn't a lot of space on the roof, and it would be easy to trip up in the dark. "Think you can make it strong enough?"

Cloud nodded, fingering the green materia in his hand. It was his own Fire, and he'd managed to get it up to Fire2 through enough practice over the last weeks. After molding that ice storm out of thin air in the practice room, Cloud had initially rejected using any more materia until necessary. However, in the last two weeks with all the review for the exam, Cloud had realized he would need some margin of control over his magic. It was still difficult when he literally felt like he was brimming over with power—a strange sensation he hadn't felt since he'd fought weak monsters at the height of his power. It could be dangerous though, and Cloud was doubly sure he wouldn't be using magic to take down any human enemies any time soon.

The trick for this plan—and one that required the utmost control—would be to maintain the right level of heat. He could probably burn down the elevators doors better than weld them shut.

Reno and Aaron's elevator next to them began to rise, moving in a heavy black shadow, a slightly dank wind stirred up as it passed, before rising up and into the blackness above.

When John turned back to him, the blond began. Pushing some energy into materia, Cloud lifted it over his head to just the bottom of where the second floor doors met. Channeling the energy into a thin tongue of flame, Cloud held it steady as he watched through both light from the fire and from John's flashlight as it touched the door.

There was a crackling, fizzing sound as the metal began to melt, and the blond put a little more energy behind it. It was a mistake though as the flame flared, and he pulled just in time to see a little window of light where he had melted a hole through the door.

John gasped quietly behind him. "I guess I was worried for nothing."

Cloud didn't respond, adjusting the flame several times until finally he started to melt the metal just above the inch-wide hole. It began to rapidly pool in the hole, and John ducked down quickly, whipping out another green materia and crystallizing the metal with a well-timed Blizzard. It solidified, and Cloud stopped to look down.

Several hardened droplets were sliding down the wall, and if John hadn't jumped in, more may have landed on Cloud's boots. "Thanks."

"No problem."

Cloud stomped his foot now that he'd gotten the hang of it, and heard the grinding screech as the elevator car began to move. Steel cables whirred and trembled as the cab began to lift. The blond was ready, with his materia held high and slowly melting the door as they rose while John froze the welded line together before it could drip too far. These elevators were old and rusty, and as Cloud had anticipated the elevator moved slowly and superheating the metal was easy.

Dan had only hit the button for the second floor, so once those doors were welded shut and the elevator had stopped, John poked his head down into the hole. "How's it look, Dan?"

Cloud could hear Dan's response as it echoed up. "Sealed shut. Should I go all the way up now?"

John glanced at the blond with his flashlight, and Cloud nodded. "Yeah."

"Okay."

It took them four and a half minutes to get to the top, and Cloud wouldn't admit it, but they were some of the longest he'd felt in awhile. It took a lot of concentration to keep the flame steady and not too hot, and John needed an Ether Dan tossed up as he MP started to give out. Dan kept up steady confirmation of the shut doors, though he also looked a little freaked out by the sound of the straining mechanism inside the doors. It wasn't strong enough to break the seal, though Cloud had been concerned it might be.

At the top floor, Reno was standing on top of the second elevator. He swiveled his flashlight at Cloud, whistling a bit at the still orange flickering of the last sealed doors. "That is gonna look great on our report. Sure you won't get pushed into the materia division?" Cloud ignored the redhead to test the sides of the cooled welding.

"In other news, I can't break the cables or the pulley. They're solid steel, and the release hinge on the top is rusted over. Think you've got enough MP to melt them too?" Cloud glanced down at the Fire materia, which was registering a lot more experience, almost enough for Fire3. As far as MP was concerned, Cloud still had about half left. He hadn't used much to weld the doors shut.

"I have to seal the eighteenth floor doors too. Has Aaron switched cars?"

"Going now," he said, a bit breathlessly as he climbed out of the other elevator and slipped down the hole into Dan's. With the doors welded shut that was the only way into one elevator anymore. John dropped down into the cab as well while Reno gripped one of the girders between the two elevators and used it to step on to Cloud's elevator. The whole team now occupied one cab while the second was ready to drop.

"Keep the flashlight on me so I can see. When I finish the doors I'll climb up to that girder and melt the pulley."

"Sure thing."

Cloud tucked the materia securely into his pocket before gripping one of the cables hanging at the center of the elevator. There were hard and cold in his hands, very rough and uncomfortably wide for his smaller grip to get completely around, but he managed. He hoisted himself high enough to be on par with the eighteenth floor doors, then using an arm and both legs to hold himself to the line, pulled out the fire materia. He managed to make a messy vertical gash on the doors, and with two more and a slight hole through it on one side, he made sure the doors wouldn't be opening again.

Cloud crawled further up then and pulled himself up on a girder. It was dusty and covered in rust, but still solid. Scooting closer to the other side of the shaft, he pulled out the materia again. "Reno," he called down. "Point the flashlight at the pulley."

"Sure," the redhead said, then crouched down for a second to peek into the car he was standing on. "Bet you 10 Gil it'll take four seconds to hit the ground."

Cloud could hear Aaron respond with his own bet, and Reno left the three inside to make their own guesses.

With the flashlight on the pulley, Cloud could now see it was a complicated piece of levers, ropes, and winding lines and reels, all attached to an electrical box between the shafts above the eighteenth floor. The whole thing was heavily rusted at parts, though clearly some of it had been chipped away to make the elevators usable.

"Reno, can you light the box up?"

"What box?" The redhead called back.

"The microprocessor that controls the elevator."

Reno darted the flashlight about a bit before he found it. Cloud crawled along the girder and reached up to the box. There was a smaller, newer microprocessor attached to it that Cloud would bet his life on SOLDIER had attached to stop the elevator from going to the basement and to probably monitor its movement. He pried it off with his fingers, snapping the wires attached to a plug on the side of the machine.

He tossed the little machine down to Reno. "Throw that behind the elevator when it falls."

Reno picked it up from where it had hit. "I could probably use this."

Cloud backed up from the electrical box. "Then keep it. I don't care."

Reno retrained the light on the pulley, and Cloud summoned up a molten white-hot flame that licked at the metal for several seconds before steam began to rise as it melted. Cloud concentrated on keeping the flame going at that heat until there was an audible snap and a whoosh as the pulley tumbled into the darkness.

There was a half second of silence before a smash of metal as the pulley hit the top of the elevator. Then very suddenly there was a horrible, ear-splitting, nails-on-chalkboard screech that ripped through the shaft. It wailed and echoed and reverberated and Cloud had enough sense to grip the materia in his hands as he covered his ears. Reno had dropped to his knees and was curled up over, the flashlight sitting on the top of the elevator forgotten.

* * *

Sephiroth jerked abruptly from where he stood by the building. There was a horrible whine being emitted from there that caused him to unconsciously reach up to cover his ears. Zack and one other First near him both winced as the sound reached them. Seconds and Thirds cocked their heads, and howling stray dogs could be heard in the distance.

When the sound abated, Zack was the first one to open his mouth. "What the fuck was that?"

* * *

Maxwell and Stojan along with the rest of their group paused on the stairs leading to the tenth floor. The walls were shaking and there was a terrible shrieking noise that made them all pause and look at each other.

"What was that?"

* * *

Cloud and the rest of his team began to recover, even as they could feel the aftershocks from the noise. Looking down from the girders, Cloud couldn't hear anything except a loud ringing in his ears. Reaching up, he gingerly touched them and was relieved when he didn't feel blood.

"Shit," he cursed, but he couldn't hear his own words. There wasn't any permanent damage to his ears, but something with the elevator must have gone wrong. "Reno?"

There was no response, but Cloud couldn't faintly make out the form of the redhead on the elevator. He was standing at least.

The ringing wouldn't stop in his head, so Cloud raised his voice. "If anyone can hear me, I need the light to get down."

He knew someone had responded when John appeared with his flashlight, handing Reno back his before shining the beam at the pulley and cables Cloud needed to climb back down.

Once he was on the elevator, he tapped Reno's shoulder. The redhead was grinning and indicated his ears, which weren't bleeding either, but were probably ringing too.

Cloud took Reno's flashlight and directed it down the other shaft. They could see the other elevator was sitting about a story and a half below them. Cloud dropped himself back inside the elevator, Reno and John behind him, as Dan and Aaron turned to him.

"Can you hear me?" He asked. He wasn't sure if he was speaking too loudly or not, it was impossible to judge volume when he couldn't hear himself.

Dan, Aaron, and John opened their mouths to speak, and Reno just grinned.

"I can't hear you now, but the other elevator must have had some kind of safety system put in. We need to go down about two levels to see if we can break the breaks."

Dan said something, but Cloud wasn't able to read his lips. There was a short flurry of conversation between him, John, and Aaron before Aaron must have won out and hit the button for the fifteenth floor, and the elevator slowly descended. When it stopped, Cloud pulled himself through with John.

The other elevator was almost exactly level with theirs, but the ropes and cables that held it up were slack. Something else was keeping it suspended. "Go down one more floor," Cloud instructed, only vaguely hearing the sound of his voice.

The elevator descended one more level, and now Cloud could see four mechanical pieces attached to the underside of the broken elevator and the rails it rode on. They were breaks, all engaged from what he could tell. They were the only things holding the elevator up.

With John's light, Cloud pulled out the fire materia again and this time didn't hold back as much. One explosion was enough to turn the first break into a dripping mess of melted metal. One more precise shot took out the second, and the horrible grinding screech repeated again. Cloud covered his ears and curled inward, but the sound didn't last long. Snapping metal resounded in the shaft, and then suddenly the elevator vanished in a void of sound, plummeting down into the vacuum below.

* * *

No one counted the seconds as they held their breath. The crash that resonated around them shook the building and made the remaining elevator sway dangerously for a second. Dust slowly began to rise to them and the other elevator stopped its tenuous shaking as Cloud peeked once more down that shaft and saw nothing but inky blackness.

Barely a minute after Sephiroth and the Firsts had recovered from the sound they heard something explode. The whole building visibly shuddered and the ground shook, but no damage could be seen. The SOLDIERs and regulation army members standing around were silent in shock for several moments before talking immediately broke out.

Sephiroth turned to Zack. "Find out who gave the cadets explosives."

Zack nodded and was about to turn away when a uniformed man ran up to the General. He pointed to one of the video monitors that showed the interior of an elevator before the screen turend to static.

"General, sir, the crash was an elevator. Elevator B had no occupants. The camera in Elevator A was shot out by Private Megarian approximately one hour ago. He's a member of Team 10, as were the last occupants of Elevator B."

Zack let out an undignified whoop and grabbed the Second Class SOLDIER for an impromptu hug. "Yeah Cloud! That's my Cloud!"


	23. The Turning Gears

The crash that caused the building to shudder rang into dead silence. Maxwell's newly formed seven-man team paused in the hallway, wondering what the explosion had been. Something that big could probably kill. How far were people going in this exam?

"Come on," Maxwell said after several moments. The explosion had shaken him and his team. "This should be the tenth floor."

Their group had discovered early on that SOLDIER intended to make this as difficult as possible for them. Black spray paint had been used liberally to cover the numbers of what floor was which in both the staircases and by the elevators.

"Here we go," he said as he rounded a corner and spotted a wall panel denoting the room as the main security room.

Stojan and the rest of the group trotted up behind him. "Guess we just fiddle with the wires, huh?"

"Yeah, can't be too hard."

They pushed open the door and discovered the room to be chaos. Monitors had been thrown across the room, slashed so deep the wall was gashed. The keyboards had been dented, removed, and spray-painted on with more of the black spray paint. There were wires sticking out of panels under the desks, and the leg of a rolling chair was sticking out of one of the consoles.

Stojan was speechless as Maxwell whirled around on him. "How the _fuck_ are we supposed to use this?"

"I didn't know!"

Stojan took a step back as Maxwell advanced. "You better had some good shit to work with because if people are blowing up each other we need everything we've got and more!"

Stojan started shouting back, blaming Maxwell for losing Riley in a standoff with another team and being a bad leader, but his words fell short when Maxwell shot him in the stomach with a paintball from bare inches away.

"You're dead."

"You bastard!" Stojan lunged, but Maxwell kicked him in the chest and sent him skidding into the hallway. He shot him one more time in the head with a paintball, knocking him out cold.

"What the hell are you doing, man?!" Mark looked pissed and the rest of Maxwell's team looked a little uneasy.

"I'm the leader. He screwed us over so he's out." Maxwell took a step closer. "You gonna say something?" Mark looked like he wanted to, but after he stared at Maxwell's determined, angry face, he backed down. "Hmph. Anyone got any ideas now?"

One of the guys on Maxwell's original team stepped forward. "There's a guy in my platoon here. He's real big on tech stuff. I'm sure he's got a mini video monitor or something with him. Just in case."

Maxwell smirked. "Then let's go get him."

* * *

Down in the basement, gathered on a pile of boxes with a couple candles and a camp light, Team 10 sat playing cards. They could only bet the cereal Aaron had thought to bring, but Reno's cards were the only real entertainment they had so they made the best of it. Everyone had been thrilled when Reno pulled out the pack after they'd successfully fixed the elevator situation. The one they dropped fell fifteen stories, but underestimated the impact. It had actually gone through the bottom of the elevator shaft and ended up crashing into the subbasement. That entire area was inaccessible with all the debris.

Cloud had shown his team the ventilation shafts he'd been planning to use, and through the maintenance shaft in the basement and the other opening along the elevator shaft, they could access almost any part of the building without beingin the open. It was ideal for guerilla tactics and ambushes. Ironically, Cloud had gotten the idea from a movie shown sometimes on the weekends at HQ. He realized that if Shinra's ventilation system was anything like this building's, then it was perfectly possible. After all, he'd gotten into a high-level conference room from a _bathroom_. It hadn't taken more than a little research to learn a bit about how ventilation systems worked to figure it out.

They'd been very successful for the first week, picking off one team and finding two stashes of ammo and food, but they were starting to run low on water. Everyone assumed by this point the rest of the supplies tucked around the building had been found, leavingthem the only option of stealing them from other teams.

Reno clambered out of the ventilation maintenance opening just as talk around the poker game turned to the water situation. "What'd you find?" John asked.

Reno ran most reconnaissance missions along with Dan. They actually made a fairly good team despite Reno snarky side comments. Both were light and good at manuvering around the air ducts.

"Is that Texas Hold 'Em?"Reno said instead. Dan climbed out next, covered in dust as usual.

"Yeah, but spill first. And don't look at my cards."

"I'm not even playing!"

"You'll whisper them to someone. You cheat like you're making big money off it."

"Don't be like that, John!" Aaron said, defending Reno.

As they continued to argue good-naturedly, Cloud looked at Dan who was brushing off his clothes. "What did you find?"

"Not good. Maxwell's team? They're like three teams combined. And they've got a hoard of food, water, a ton of spare guns, and plenty of ammunition."

Cloud sighed as he handed his cards to Reno to play for him. "Anything else?"

"Not much," Dan shrugged, futiely brushing off dust from the front of his uniform. "Someone flooded the bathroom on the eleventh floor. I don't get why we don't just take an empty jug and fill it from the tap."

Aaron opened his mouth but Reno beat him to it. "You want to know what goes in the water below the plate? Everything the Science Department cooks up and more. Trust me; you don't want to be drinking that."

Cloud cut off that conversation before it could start. "We need to strike Maxwell's team. If they're that big, then they're a threat. What level are they situated on?"

"The eighteenth. They patrol the sixteenth too."

"The seventeenth," Reno added in as he laid down a flush on the box they were using as a table, "Is actually left pretty much alone. They've usually got one or two guys by the stairs there to be back-up."

"How well fortified is their base?" Cloud asked.

"It's in the CEO's room. Maxwell stays there with the rest of the team not patrolling. It's about five people, give or take. They only leave one person there and one person outside the door when they do a raid or attack somebody."

Cloud's eyebrow shot up. "You've been watching them," he accused without any judgment in his voice. Reno hadn't mentioned that. The redhead functioned better on his own, so it wasn't uncommon for him to disappear into the ventilation ducts for awhile.

"So what. Point is, let's smash 'em."

"Yeah! I could go for a good fight," Aaron added in. John put down his cards and rolled his shoulders.

Dan sighed. "Can I get a drink before we go?" Everyone else ignored him though, packing up anything useful, checking ammunition and then trooping to the elevator shaft. Dan gulped two swallows of water before grabbing his gun and running after them.

Together Team 10 rode the elevator up to the sixteenth floor. Climbing out of the now permanently open roof hatch, Cloud and Dan watched as the other three scrambled up the girders until they came to the grated opening of the ventilation shafts on the fifteenth floor.

John pulled the grating away and dropped it on top of the elevator. "Reno, John, and Aaron. You guys cause the distraction. Take down as many as you can without showing yourselves. Dan and I will recover as much as we can from base," Cloud directed.

Reno, John, and Aaron clambered into the ventilation shaft as Cloud and Dan dropped back into the elevator and rode it up to the seventeenth floor. There they entered their own air duct, Dan first since he knew the way better, and crawled through until finally they were above the was eerily similar to what Cloud had done in the beginning of AVALANCHE.

The angle from the vent wasn't great, but Maxwell was sitting on the CEO's old desk, talking to two other members. One more person was sitting on the side, a ration bar sticking out of his mouth as he fiddled with his gun.

"What do you see?" Cloud whispered as quietly as possible from behind Dan. Only Dan could see through the grating, and he didn't dare crawl past it and turn around so Cloud could see too. Someone might hear the sound, and secrecy was their greatest weapon.

"Three guys and Maxwell. And loads of ammo."

"Wait until there's one left inside. If you can, shoot him from here. I'll go into the hallway and wait for that one."

* * *

"Stop shoving!" Someone hissed.

"I'm not!"

"I think I'm getting claustrophobic."

"If you're gonna throw up, do it on John."

"You don't vomit when you're claustrophobic," grumbled the soldier quietly.

Reno suddenly stopped crawling forward, becoming perfectly still. Taking the cue, John and Aaron froze too, all complaints about the cramped quarters forgotten. Voices drifted up to them through the thin metal of the ducts. "…Just heard it go by. It's like a ghost is riding it."

"Don't talk like that, man. It's just another team."

"But the doors are melted shut, who the hell does that? The one on the eighteenth floor is still _warm_. Isn't that weird?"

Reno started to snicker as he overheard the conversation. John rolled his eyes. "Just shoot them would you?"

"Fine, fine. Party pooper." As quietly and carefully as possible, Reno lifted the grates and lowered them softly onto the other side of the hole. Popping his head down quickly, he managed to see that both guys were sitting against the walls, guns across their laps, talking.

With John gripping his legs, Reno lowered his upper body into the hallway, enough to get them into his line of sight. He was a good enough shot he could hit them both, but he had to be quick. Only his abdominal muscles were holding him up now, and if he relaxed even a little the gun or his belt might hit the side of the hole, alerting his targets. He took aim, and fired two shots, the first hitting the guy in front in the back, the second hitting the guy next to him on the side of the head.

John pulled Reno back up, and the redhead easily shifted his body so he legs were in the hole before dropping down. John and Aaron followed quickly after.

"Nice shots," John said as he looked at the two downed cadets. One was still looking woozy from the headshot, but the other was recovered and angry. Once both boys' hands were tired together and one was gagged, Aaron and Reno went back into the ducts while John dragged the cadet to the stairs and carried him up them. Once there, he headed carefully to the hallway with the CEO's office, and dropped him just around the corner.

"Be good and scream," said John with a grin.

He kicked the guy swiftly in the shin hard enough to make him shout. Two guys immediately appeared in the hallway. Before they could get far, Aaron took one down with a close-range shot to the back, and the other a direct hit to the mid-chest by Cloud.

Once everyone was out of the ventilation shafts, they stormed the office. John took a grazing hit from one guy on the lower leg, and pretended to hop around for the cameras just in case they penalized him. Maxwell managed to slip into the adjoined room in the chaos and lock the door while they shot down the other man.

"Should we go after him?"

"I already checked that room. The vent shaft is blocked by boxes and a bookshelf. We can't get through there."

"I'll wait for him to leave," Dan put in.

Cloud shook his head. "Don't worry about him. We've still got a little more than a week left."

They packed up their haul and loaded it back through the vents outside the elevator into the cab. They rode it down to the basement where they had to jump down about a foot because the elevator was raised on the leftover debris from the crash.

"How many people are left now, you reckon?" Aaron asked.

"I'd say, with the five we took down today, about thirtyish?" John answered.

"Huh."

"Things last time slowed down after the first week. Seems everyone would rather a lot of people live than fail," John continued.

Reno sighed. "Guess that means we'll be playing a lot of poker. Does anyone know any other games?"

* * *

Rufus unabashedly grinned as he slipped the request form into the paper shredder. Sometimes just denying the Science Department something as simple as a new order of epidermal syringes made his whole day better.

His airy office was quite large, with a number of spacious windows, plants demurely scattered about, and it was only a couple doors down from his father's. With several plush leather couches, a fine mahogany desk, and a small collection of paperweights on bookshelves with unread books, it was, as far as Rufus was concerned, not enough. No, his father's office was more his style, with the six massive windows behind the desk, the four pillars by the entrance, and the helicopter pad just a couple steps away. _That_ was what Rufus wanted, not this second-class office.

As the only son of the formidable CEO of Shinra, Rufus had grown up always getting what he wanted. It might have seemed like a spoiled childhood of decadence, but he had never seen it that way. It was the reward for hard work, for his father's achievements, and as his son, he would also reap the rewards. All lives worked the same, Rufus knew, his was just particularly wealthy.

But some things, as he had learned the hard way, were not meant for him to have until his father said so. As a teenager he'd fought it tooth and nail, but with age came refinement, but never acceptance. Rufus imagined his relationship with his father was something like a long, complicated, business transaction. Blood was hardly relative to how they worked together—or against each other. In the end, as far as Rufus was concerned, it wouldn't really matter. His grandfather's death _had_ been rather sudden after all.

He smoothed down the front of his white suit, a habit to make sure he looked as wealthy and fine as he was. It wasn't vanity that had Rufus always dressing impeccably, at both the height of fashion and quality, it was expected of him. Glancing at the silver wristwatch embedded with six diamonds on his wrist, Rufus shuffled the paperwork together. He wanted to be out of here by noon if he expected to skip the executives meeting. He had absolutely no desire to be locked in a conference room with the old geezers, the General, and the absent chair of the Science Department's head.

Rufus shook his head, then ran his fingers through his hair to muss it up nicely. Stacking his papers in a neat pile, he pushed back his seat, and took a quick glance around the office to make sure nothing was out of place. He left then, offering a flirty smile to his secretary, as was , he didn't mean it, but at least he knew her name. More than many an executive could attest to. Plus, he thought he was significantly better off. Andrea was married with a daughter—no emotional tangles and having a child meant she was reliable…and easy to control.

He couldn't help the slight smirk that graced his features as he passed his father's door while walking to the glass elevator. His father was fat, lazy, and in utter denial that his company only belonged to him in name now. All of the elite knew President Shinra's power was becoming more limited with every paper he signed. Rufus was both embarrassed and pleased at the opportunity his father presented.

The glass elevator was waiting for him as he stepped inside. Soundlessly it began to move down, and he watched the floors fly by while casually examining the buttons of his suit and refolding the cuffs.

The control of the company, and subsequently the world, was in the hands of a variety of departments, who, through various agreements, sexual affiliations, or assassination threats, worked together on the most basic level. It was how Shinra was run now, but it hadn't always been that way. The department heads were indolent now; too accustomed to the influence they wielded to give the sordid history of how they'd gotten those positions any thought. Rufus intended to capitalize on that in time.

Slowing to a gentle stop, the bell rang and a pleasant female voice announced the first floor. Stepping out, Rufus strode quickly over to the front doors, ignoring the eyes of the peons as they watched. He met his car outside the front, slipping into the backseat of the black limo and shutting the door with a decisive click. If he bothered to look, he would see a Turk slipping out of the building and into the car behind him.

Rufus had ideas, plans, on how to reassert his control of the company. It was slow going though, considering how bloated the Science and Weapons departments were and how little Veld liked Rufus. Rufus hadn't yet touched Sephiroth, but considering the loyalty the General commanded that one would have be dealt with very carefully, hopefully with the backing of the Turks.

Rufus watched the skyscrapers, the people, and the other cars go by outside the window of his limo as he considered how to keep SOLDIER with Shinra, and how much would have to be gutted. He smoothed out his suit once again, before discreetly checking a mirror in one of his pockets. If this meeting went well, he might have the Turks in his pocket soon.

* * *

General Sephiroth stepped into the command room of the SOLDIER Exam as he had every morning for the past week, his posture upright and proud, eyes moving quickly across the men standing at attention before murmuring an "at ease".

The first week of the exam had been a fruitful one with nearly two-thirds of the boys already out. Those that were left would probably remain that way, as was the case in most exams. There would be skirmishes, and maybe a handful more would be taken out, but otherwise they'd bide the rest of the week rather than risk failing. They had enough supplies and a safe enough base to stay that way. These daily checks he made were just routine at this point, and to please his Lieutenant General who called it his, quote, "social dosage hour". Sephiroth did not find this particularly funny, but then, most jokes Zack made at his expense were only funny to Zack.

"Mornin' Seph." He saw said SOLDIER out of the corner of his eye pop open the outside door with his hip as he stepped in. Zack was juggling two mugs of coffee and an orange. Sephiroth caught the orange when Zack bounced it off his knee to him, grinning the whole while. "Figured you'd want something healthy. Anything new?"

One of the men on duty jumped to answer Zack's inquiry. "Lieutenant General, sir, we have the updates."

Sephiroth held the cold orange in his hand, glancing at Zack's two coffee mugs (one decaf for later, one expresso for now) as he pulled out a pocketknife to begin peeling it. He let Zack take the lead on the interaction here, so long as he heard all the news.

"Excellent," said Zack, "How's my Cloud doing?" He wandered closer to the monitors to get a good look as one of the men started to summarize the past twelve hours activity.

Sephiroth picked at the peel as he half-listened to the dialogue, thinking more about Strife and his strategy. He was both amused and slightly impressed by it, but it also bothered him. He'd left the first day of the exam wondering what the blond was planning to do from the basement. A quick glance over the blueprints of the building had been enough to tell him what Cloud was doing. Knocking out the elevators, permanently shutting the elevator doors (men picking up the "dead" had noted that), and attacking through air ventilation shafts of all things.

He peeled the skin of the orange deftly in a circular loop until it began to coil like a spring. The heady scent of citrus filled the room, but no one turned back to look at him. Zack commanded the attention of the soldiers as he enthusiastically commented on Cloud's latest recorded escapade, eliciting laughs all the while. Zack's natural charisma was in full swing today.

What bothered Sephiroth about Strife's plan was not the cleverness of it or the ingenuity, but rather how Strife had known the ventilation shafts' main entrance was in the basement in the first place. How had he known the shafts would be large enough for a man to fit in? He would have to ask him.

After watching the tape again in his office of Cloud at the elevators and Megarian shooting one out, it had occurred to Sephiroth that Strife couldn't know much about the ventilation shafts of any buildings in Midgar—even the ones in the cadet barracks were more modern and too small for anything for a young child to fit in. How many office building's blueprints must the blond have seen to know that the older models had larger vents for maintenance purposes? Shina Headquarters was built that way, but not even Sephiroth had access to those blueprints, and the HQ didn't have a basement but laboratories, which probably didn't even _have_ blueprints.

Zack had not seemed to notice this inconsistency, being more concerned with Cloud's excellent showing in the exam. Sephiroth had not brought it up with him yet, waiting to see what else Strife might do.

Sephiroth split the now skinless orange in half. Oranges were not his favorite fruit, being rather messy (though give Zack a grapefruit and he could decimate a room), but he could appreciate the tangy taste of them, and certainly the health benefits.

Zack wandered back over from the screens and held out a hand for a slice, before sighing loudly and throwing his head back with his hands locked behind. "Well, Cloud's doing fine as usual. Has everything been cleared for the week after?"

Sephiroth glanced up at the monitors to give them a cursory look, before handing the last two pieces of his orange to Zack. "Yes. And the Turks have put in their requests."

Zack's eyes flicked to the screens too, watching as Reno's grey image handed a box of ammo up to waiting hands. They weren't Cloud's hands as far as he could tell. Cloud didn't wear a watch. "Anyone of interest?" Zack asked casually.

"Reno," Sephiroth dropped, cleaning out the orange pith from under his fingernails. His hands would smell of orange all day now. Another reason he didn't particularly like them.

"Huh, couldn't see that one coming," Zack remarked sarcastically. He didn't sound any different, but Sephiroth knew he was relieved. Losing Strife to the Turks would have been… inconvenient.

* * *

Aaron woke to some quiet shuffling around in the basement not to far from his head. He groggily opened his eyes, listening vaguely as someone unzipped something then shuffled around some more before finally stopping. Hoping it was just Reno going for a piss, Aaron shut his eyes and buried his face a little deeper into his sweatshirt-turned-pillow.

No such luck. "Hey, Aaron…?"

Someone's warm finger poked his shoulder through the fabric of his shirt. Frustrated as he woke up a little more, Aaron rolled on to his back and reluctantly opened his eyes.

Dan hovered next to him, looking insecure. Aaron couldn't help superimposing an image of a small five-year-old Dan when he'd had a nightmare from the look on his face. He blinked groggily and wiped at the crust in his eyes, but the face remained.

"What is it?" His voice came out scratchy and still half-asleep, but at least it was quiet. Dan's face was starting to worry him, with its unnatural crease along his forehead and downturned lips. He gave a quick glance around to the others, but everyone was still breathing evenly and there was no other noise.

"Can I ask you something?" Dan was crouched in the dark with a flickering lighter held in his hands. He looked younger despite the shadows, with his shoulders hunched as he rocked a little on his heels.

Aaron shook off the last bit of sleep. "Sure." He cracked his knee as he stood up, then padded a little ways further in the basement, away from the sleeping camp. It was hard to tell what they were standing around with only the meager light, but Aaron figured they were far enough away they wouldn't wake anyone. "Okay, tell me."

Dan glanced around first to stall for time, before sitting down in a desk chair, the lighter cradled in his lap. He looked rather nervous, so Aaron put a hand on his shoulder. "Look, you can tell me anything and I won't tell a soul, kay?"

"Yeah," Dan mumbled. "It's well… I'm not sure where I- where I… _fit in_ anymore."

Confused, Aaron sat down on a pile of folders, if a little precariously, before putting his hands on his knees. "Fit in?"

"I, well… um, you know how you…" The words were jumbled and muttered, which made it difficult to hear. Aaron almost leant forward more, but he knew how intimidating and probing that could feel, so he refrained. "How you… _don't_. You're just… okay with it." He was flushed red even in the light, and it was clear how uncomfortable he was broaching this at all.

"Fit in…" Aaron rolled the words around his mouth, before his eyebrow shot up, and then he gave a short laugh before cutting it off abruptly, realizing everyone else was still sleeping. "You mean being gay?" When Dan stumbled out some kind of apology Aaron waved it off, still smiling. "It's no big deal to me. The only people who care are the ones who don't matter. Everyone wants to be accepted, I get that, but it's who accepts it that 's totally normal in SOLDIER and the army anyway, so I'm not worried."

Dan fidgeted but didn't say anything, and Aaron figured he already had a feeling he knew where this was going.

"You know, liking guys is totally cool. I mean, it shouldn't mean anything to anyone else. Your life and all."Aaron rubbed his knee, unsure if Dan wanted advice, comfort, or something else. He'd never really done this before since he'd always been the odd man out back home, and he certainly didn't want his first stint as a councilor to mess the guy up more.

Dan looked rather alarmed though, and Aaron thought he might have jumped too far. "I- I don't?" Dan murmured.

It ended up coming out like a question, and Aaron rubbed his knuckles along his knee as he thought about Dan's predicament. "Look, no matter which way you go—or both—no one but you should care." Aaron tilted his head at Dan, tapping the boy on the knee when he looked like he might fidget his way off the chair. "Trust me, I know how important it is for the people you love to accept you, but don't deny being yourself for them."

That leap of faith seemed to be the right thing to say. Dan's face reflected it. "Yeah…" He still didn't sound very convinced though, and Aaron frowned.

"Hey look. You never have to act on it if you don't want to. You _can_ ignore it." Dan looked like he was about to interject was some more denial or start spouting some kind of family values, so Aaron leaned forward and slipped his hand into Dan's smaller grip that was cupping the little flame. The cadet jumped, but Aaron kept his grip. "It's a part of you, and you'll have to accept it someday." He rubbed a thumb along the back of hand soothingly, trying to convey comfort even though every hair on Dan's body was raised up in alarm. "I've seen guys before who just can't take it. They get all weird about it, you know, defensive, paranoid even. And I feel bad for those guys because, like you said, they don't fit in. Not with gays, not with straights, not with anyone, and especially not with themselves. Sad, really."

Dan hadn't relaxed, but he was beginning to stop looking like he'd jump off the desk chair and bolt. "I won't be there," Dan said, but he still had that childish uncertainty to his tone that Aaron couldn't just brush off. He just shook his head.

"Don't let it get to you. It only becomes a big deal when you make it one." He stepped away and helped Dan brush out some of the dust from the back of his purple chocobo pajama pants, ignoring the boy's jump.

They were just starting to walk back when Dan spoke up. "You make it a big deal." He cast a rather innocently curious look at Aaron that made Dan seem about six.

"I make it a big deal because there's nothing that makes me laugh harder than seeing guys three times my size jump and scream." Dan didn't seem to get the humor, but Aaron didn't mind. "Now, we should sleep. Cloud is merciless in the morning."

Aaron didn't get a thank you, but he hadn't expected one. Dan's thoughtful face was enough.

* * *

Reeve flicked off the lights in his cluttered office and stepped out on to the mundane hallway carpet, hiding a yawn in the shoulder of his jacket since he had another box of paperwork to drop off before he could head home. Tonight he didn't have to meet with Reno again, which was both a pleasure and a disappointment. Reno was, in many aspects, a rather good piece of entertainment for Reeve. He almost always gave Reeve something to chew on when he went to work the next day. Not meeting him though also meant another evening free to settle down with a glass of wine and relax.

He started down the hallway, passing several storage closets and dark offices, before coming to the one lit room on the floor where the night-staff secretary was. She hardly glanced at him when he dropped the box of papers off in front of her desk, just staring at the flickering screen on her computer, tapping an inch-long nail against the desk. He murmured a quick goodnight to her, but she didn't even blink. Like a zombiefrom one of those early sci-fi B-movies _._

With the exams in full swing, Reeve's paperwork still didn't change. It never did. The problem with the Urban Development department is they were always given the same amount of paperwork—the difference was during the SOLDIER Exams or say, a parade, the paperwork was actually _important_.

Speaking of important, Reeve had passed by a certain Turk leader earlier in the day that looked like he was on a mission. Reno had mentioned he'd had a "meeting" with Tseng, but hadn't offered up details. Reeve assumed it hadn't gone well since Reno never had anything nice to say about the Turks.

He adjusted his briefcase over his shoulder with his now empty hands, before walking down the hallway, turning at the right corner, and opening the door on the end that led to the stairwell.

Reeve led a, admittedly, rather boring life. Unfortunately with the death of his family he'd sort of drifted out of any "fun" activities and into the monotonous drone of cubicle life. He therefore had to spice it up somehow, and that was what often kept him going when things became especially dull.

Instead of going down the stairwell, Reeve headed up. He went up nearly ten more stories until a small service door was found, almost hidden in a corner. This storage closet was like the attic of Shinra, and had a number of surprising things inside. Reeve had found it long ago, and came up often to entertain a hobby he had abandoned after childhood: tinkering with machines.

There was of course, Cait Sith, who was hidden up here in a box. He'd spent a good four months after the funerals obsessively fixing up the robotic cat and the giant moogle it rode on. He done several more projects over the next series of years but had finally begun to slow down when he started to recover from the loss. After Reno's distraction and minor chaos he could feel at the edges of Shinra, Reeve was ready for another one.

The attic was full of boxes, dust, and actually a number of small fiends. Activating Cait Sith, Reeve wandered into the old machine area while the moogle and robotic cat dealt with any of the smaller monsters that might want to snack on Reeve's ankles.

He dug around for a while into various boxes, tinkering a little with small clocks, broken fans, and a number of ancient computers without much interest, really just waiting to find something that would keep him busy for another month or two. As he searched though he found his mind wandering though, to the Turks, Reno, SOLDIER, and the emptiness of his job. When he realized what he was thinking about, he'd renew his search more vigorously, upturning a box or two while the cat chattered in the background. Inevitably though it swung back to the real reason Reeve was up here in an abandoned storage closet looking for something worthwhile to do.

He didn't find anything that night, nor for the next week whenever he decided to come up. It was just a dry spell, he'd tell himself, and he'd find something new to put his energy into. He just had to find it first.


	24. Country Roads, Take Me Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cloud's closer to Nibelheim than he has been in years, and Sephiroth might be on to him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Writer's Note: If you've read this story on Fanfiction.net, then you'll notice that some scenes got rewritten, particularly Sephiroth's parts.

"Congratulations, cadets, on passing."

Cheers erupted from the thirty cadets, all standing outside the building they'd been holed up in for the past two weeks. Everyone started shouting and laughing, throwing things in the air, patting each other on the back, and grinning until their faces hurt _._ The euphoria that welled up inside Cloud's chest was unimaginable, and all he wanted to do was sit down and cry, laugh and run, do everything and nothing at once. It was as a dream, long forgotten, he'd always harbored somewhere inside came true. It was a moment of Cloud's life he'd never felt he'd reach, and hearing those words from Sephiroth's mouth for him was enough to forget the past for a second and just relish the glory of the moment. He'd made SOLDIER.

All thirty of them came together in a group, jumping up and down, waving bandanas around, excitedly shouting about SOLDIER. Already there were cadets sharing stories of what had happened in the exam. Even Cloud, normally not one for those kinds of festivities, was in the group, his arm gripped by a beaming Reno whose face was red and his smile nearly splitting it as he congratulated everyone, even Maxwell, and people Cloud didn't even know.

The shoves, the pats on the back and even the ruffled hair didn't bother Cloud for once. He could hardly remember how he'd gotten here, what had happened, except that it was SOLDIER.

_SOLDIER_.

The dream he'd chased after across two lifetimes.

* * *

They'd partied that night. All thirty of them crashed a bar and drank until even the last of their rations were down the toilet when they inevitably vomited it all back up. Cloud, who typically had been unable to get drunk because of mako, now enjoyed the slight dizziness accompanying the handful of beers he'd drank. He was sitting on a barstool watching Dan make a fool of himself on the dance floor.

Zack had passed up on Cloud's admittedly shy invitation to join them, saying it was a celebration for them. The blond hadn't had time to be disappointed when Reno started to drag him down the street shouting about victory shots.

He could feel the silly grin threatening to spill across his face for the hundredth time that evening, when it hit him all over again. He was in SOLDIER.

Aaron took the barstool next to Cloud; his face lit a bright red from the booze and laughter they'd been sharing all night. "Hey Cloud," he slurred slightly. He still wasn't nearly as drunk as many of their compatriots. "What'll you do now?"

Cloud shrugged. He was still rational enough to know that 'saving the Planet' would sound strange, even from a plastered cadet.

"Well," Aaron, plowed on, seemingly uncaring that Cloud hadn't answered. "I'm going to find a nice guy. We can share an apartment, and I'll do the decorating since I've always wanted to do that, and he should be able to cook…"

Aaron continued to ramble on a bit as Cloud thought about what kind of sword he might get in SOLDIER. Double-edge buster sword like First Tsurugi? Did they make those? Even Zack's was only single-edged. Well, maybe he could design his own…

"Hey, when do we get to go home?" Aaron leaned over to him, almost going for a conspiratorial whisper but not quite able to pull it off.

"Leave?"

"Not forever, just to say hi to mum. She'd be real happy."

Cloud wondered what his mother would say. He couldn't remember telling her he hadn't made it into SOLDIER or what her response was, but now… She would be proud, he hoped.

"My mum, she's gone," Aaron said softly. He was a talkative drunk. "But, you know, I gotta put flowers down for her. And dad'll wanna hear the good news in person. He's tough like that, you know? And I've got a younger brother that'll love to know it, and…" Aaron murmured on a little longer before bursting into laughter as one guy spilled his drink, slipped on it, and still managed to chance a glance up a women's skirt. Aaron cheered the guy on when he got smacked by the woman, then turned back to Cloud. "A toast, Cloud, to SOLDIER."

"To SOLDIER," Cloud echoed.

Cloud tipped his head back as Aaron left and looked at the bottom of the wineglasses hanging from the top of the bar, smiling at them. He'd passed. He was going to be in SOLDIER. Already the future was looking brighter, and to Cloud it had always been a storm-front. He smiled into his glass before accidentally snorting in some of his beer as a fiery blonde woman slapped Reno upside the head.

* * *

Cloud sat down on his bunk with a low thump, wincing as the pounding in his head magnified and the dryness of his mouth. He could hardly remember last night, and he couldn't recall making it back to the bunker at was all a brilliant blur of bright colors, teary eyes, and beaming faces. He'd been so _happy_. Cloud couldn't remember the last time he'd been so euphoric. In fact, he didn't think he'd _ever_ been that happy before.

He wished, for a somber moment, it could have been like this with AVALANCHE at the end of their journey.

Now, of course, the hangover settled in, and he still had duties. Popping two pain pills dry, he shuffled to the bathroom to shower off the sweat and alcohol. Reno and Dan, along with Aaron who had bunked for the night in their room, were still dead asleep.

He looked haggard in the mirror at first glance, and also infinitely younger. Some of the shadow in his eyes was gone, and despite the clear signs of a late-night party with no real sleep, he looked better than he had in years. The last time he'd had this much to drink he'd ended up in the cadet bathroom jerking off to another Sephiroth-fantasy. At least this time he hadn't needed that to get out of the brooding haze he usually ended up in when drunk.

By the time he was cleaned up his hangover had dimmed to a low throb he could easily ignore. Reno was just beginning to groggily wake as Cloud pulled on his cadet uniform one last time.

"Morning," Cloud murmured to Reno. The redhead's hair was sticking up every which way, his eyes were bloodshot, and he still had on the clothes he'd worn last night. The thick scent of women's perfume lingered over him, Cloud noticed as he passed him on his way out the door. Reno didn't seem to even register he was awake.

Out in the corridor, Cloud bounced in place a couple of times, feeling more energetic than he had in years despite the headache. Deciding to work it out of his system and get some fresh air, he wandered out of the cadet barracks and out on to the field.

He'd barely jogged a hundred yards before he saw a group of SOLDIERs clumped together on the far end of the field. Pulling to the edge of the field in the shadow of Shinra Headquarters, Cloud jogged quietly closer until he spotted seven helicopters, all emblazoned with the Shinra logo. There were sitting on the grass, quietly for now, and Cloud knew he must have been totally dead in his sleep to have missed the sound of that many choppers so close to the barracks. Cloud squinted at the group and spotted Zack standing by the lead helicopter, talking with several Second Class SOLDIERs.

Cloud couldn't make out what kind of mission the group was there for. Five helicopters, but only four Second Class SOLDIERs and Zack. Were they waiting for Thirds?

"You're up early."

Cloud whirled around in place, but remnants of his hangover made him wince and unconsciously touch his forehead when he spun too fast. The world looked a little fuzzy for a couple of precious seconds, seconds that counted if it had been a beast behind him. Of course, it was something much worse than a fiend sneaking up on him. It was the General, and those green eyes were locked on him.

Sephiroth didn't say anything more, just looking at him, his stare unreadable. It seemed to register with Cloud suddenly that the _General_ was leaning against the back of the building staring at him, and there was tension in the man's shoulders hiding under that calm façade. There was no way the man had missed Cloud's debilitating seconds after he'd spun too fast, and Cloud internally winced at the show of weakness.

The General was dressed in full combat attire, with the shoulder pauldrons, leather pants and overcoat, and the harness for Masamune. It was something Cloud hadn't seen properly since the last reincarnation he'd fought. It brought back a strange mixture of memories that left Cloud feeling a little hollow and, weirdly, a little nostalgic. He snapped off a salute when he realized he was staring. "Good morning, General."

Cloud felt a trickle of sweat form on the back of neck, as Sephiroth seemed to take a long moment to measure him with his eyes before responding. Cloud was not at his best this morning and confrontation with Sephiroth could be disastrous. As usual.

"A rough morning, Strife?"

Sephiroth did not make small talk, and there was something sharp in his tone that said he wasn't talking about the blond's obvious hangover. The man was circling him with his words, waiting for the kill. Wit had never been Cloud's specialty, and he felt it keenly now. "Yes, sir."

"Admirable of you to show up early then. A trait that will save you from future punishment…" Cloud's whole body seized up as Sephiroth seemed to deliberately linger on that word, though the blond attributed it to his overactive imagination jerking awake, when Sephiroth continued on smoothly. "…unlike the Lieutenant General."

Cloud's mouth went dry and he wanted to swallow, but that little tell would be enough to show that he had no idea what the General was talking about, and he hadn't really been paying as much attention as he should have been. "Yes, sir."

Sephiroth was still leaning against the wall, his eyes narrowed slightly, but he was not angry. Just… looking at him. Hard. Masamune was nowhere in sight, for which Cloud was very thankful, but something about the predatory look behind the deceptively calm green eyes, coupled with the same outfit from Nibelheim, made Cloud instinctively want to hunch down or pick up his sword.

He didn't, because he wasn't the same teenager as before and he currently had no weapons on him, but that didn't mean that combat-ready Sephiroth looking like he wanted to finish the interrogation right now didn't make him feel that young for a second.

"Zack will have saved you a seat on the first helicopter, Strife. I am sure he wishes to extend his congratulations." Sephiroth swept some of his silver hair aside when the wind blew it a little forward, and the General's eyes flicked to the choppers then back. He looked straight at Cloud then, eyes narrowing slightly even more, and he seemed to loom a little larger. "Your performance was admirable, but curious. I will save my congratulations for a later conversation."

Cloud could feel his gut clench in trepidation at that promise, but he didn't want to show how intimidated he currently was. "Thank you, sir," he said clearly, trying to convey confidence and not his fears that Sephiroth was sinking his teeth in and he just didn't know how or where.

Sephiroth looked mildly surprised, but it slipped away into amusement tinged with something else. "You're welcome." Then he turned and strode off to the cluster of SOLDIERs.

Cloud could feel the automatic urge to overanalyze the conversation until he found some hidden meaning, but resisted when he saw two other cadets start to stumble over to the helicopters. He would just need to be ready the next time he ran into Sephiroth. Cloud had thought after the interrogation that Sephiroth was leaving all questions about the blond to Zack. The First had asked a bit about Cloud's background, but Sephiroth had seemingly backed off, even when Cloud had run errands and made deliveries to Sephiroth's office. Yet it was looking like the blond's grace period had run out and he hadn't even noticed. If the panther hadn't pounced yet, then what was he waiting for?

* * *

"Fuck, they did that on purpose!" Reno's outburst managed to make several Seconds standing to the side laugh. The cadets, huddled together by the five helicopters, were looking homicidal, upset, or barely determined. It was, all in all, a poor combination.

"We'd told you you'd passed," one of the Seconds said, stepping forward. "Not that you'd made SOLDIER."

Reno scowled angrily, spitting on the ground. "That's so cheap," he muttered under his breath mutinously.

Cloud wasn't looking at either the General or Zack, who were standing a short ways away with two other Firsts. He couldn't help feeling betrayed by his friend on a deep level, and he was trying not to glare across the way at him. He wasn't mainly because of the powerful stare he could feel from the General on the side of his head. He would "save his congratulations for later" indeed. Cloud stared at the ground and willed himself not to throw up, cry, or hurt someone. SOLDIER… How had he not known about the second test? How could they keep something that secret so well?

The First Class SOLDIERs walked over, including Zack and the General. As they approached Cloud was sure Zack was staring at him too, but Cloud didn't look up.

"Gentlemen, if you would," Zack said, indicating with flourish the five helicopters. "All will be explained when we land again. I'd suggest you take this time to consider what you're entering. SOLDIER is more than just an elite branch of the military. We are the best for a reason, and that means you might be sent out on a mission very suddenly," he waved at the helicopters and assembled men with a mocking smile, "in poor condition. You will also be expected to survive in places and situations you don't anticipate or know much about. Think about that now, because once you're on the ground you won't have time to."

He pulled himself into the nearest helicopter, and the cadets were divvied up into groups for each transport. Cloud was obviously pushed towards the first one that Zack was already in, and he could hear the First calling his name. He refused to glower, instead drawing on his tightly wound self-control as he headed towards it. It would be childish to ignore the direction and try to get into another helicopter, and Zack would take personal offense, which, though tempting now, would just be immature.

Just as he reached the helicopter, Zack spoke up. "Congrats on passing, Cloud. Seriously, you were awesome."

He sounded genuine, and Zack was smiling at him widely but gently, which did soften the edge of betrayal Cloud was still selfishly guarding. Before he could react though Zack grabbed the front of his uniform and all but dragged him into a seat. Cloud exhaled and pointedly didn't make eye contact. He didn't remove the offending hand though as he was pushed down into the seat, helping him buckle up the complicated harness.

"You know I would have told you if I could. Seph made me swear up and down on my mentor's grave I wouldn't tell you. It's why I had to avoid you all week. You know me! You bat those baby blues and I'd have spilled every secret I know," Zack joked. He nudged Cloud carefully. "I really am sorry Cloud. They do this every year though. Gotta set you up for disappointment and failure so you know what it feels like and how to overcome it. At least that's the drivel Seph told me."

Cloud could feel the walls of his anger at Zack melting at the First's heartfelt apology. As Zack went to sit down in his own seat Cloud grabbed his wrist and squeezed quickly before letting go. He wasn't good at this, trying to think of something to say to Zack, but the First patted him on the shoulder and gave him a blinding grin.

All might have been good between them now, but Cloud was still angry; he just wasn't mad with Zack but with himself. How could he have not seen this, not _known_? It was impossible to hide a whole second test from all of Shinra, even if they tried to disguise it as training new SOLDIERs or something. It started the literal day after the test, before even Shinra's famous bureaucratic red tape could even sort through a third of the paperwork. That should have set off some alarms at least. Had Cloud really been that self-absorbed before? Had he been that self-absorbed _now_?

With his face turned to the open side of the aircraft, he saw one other cadet get in and take the seat next to Cloud. Zack, with his back to the pilot, greeted him enthusiastically despite the slightly nauseous look on the kid's face. Two more Seconds joined them to fill the transport, quietly talking to themselves.

Cloud heard the footsteps coming up to the helicopter even over the sound of Zack's cheerful voice blathering on to the unsuspecting cadet next to him. Sephiroth had always been distinct in nearly every way, and he had a confident, unyielding stride that Cloud recognized from endless lulls in battle. Nothing was more terrifying than being stalked by a predator who didn't feel the need for stealth.

The General smoothly climbed into the helicopter and set Masamune down by their feet, locking it in place with a couple straps set on the floor. Cloud did not look at the General as he did this, but he listened closely as the leather of his outfit creaked as he crouched and the gentle swoosh of his long hair. When he settled into the seat next to the pilot the doors on the sides were shut and the rotors began to spin. Cloud heard the cadet by him gasp as they started to pick up speed before the sound drowned out all else. The cadet was staring out the window as the dirt was blown up and around, but Cloud's eyes were focused on the sheath for Masamune. It was a part of the sword that, Cloud realized with a jolt, he'd never seen before.

Sephiroth didn't wear the scabbard in combat, ostensibly because it would be difficult to remove a seven-foot sword from a seven-foot sheath quickly. It was made of a hard wood, with designs drawn into it that Cloud recognized as a battle scene of some kind. There were even words across the length of it, but he did not know the language.

He was snapped out of his reverie by Zack's foot kicking his shin playfully. "Come on Cloud, everything okay? You're not gonna try to hack my head off next practice session are you?" Zack had to yell over the sound of the helicopter's rotors spinning. The cadet next to the blond gripped the straps of his harness so tight his hands were white as bone. Cloud did feel a sickening lurch as they took off, but he'd ridden in enough of Cid's airships to be used to this sort of thing.

"Look, since we're airborne, I can talk about it a little, and you've got the home-court advantage here that I had nothing to do with! I swear, that decision was made long before we were even training!" Zack was smiling at him as he half shouted to be heard, but when Cloud didn't respond he frowned a bit. "Are you still mad at me?"

Cloud looked up at him finally, unable to hear most of what Zack was saying, but he'd heard the last bit as they'd flown off. He was still mostly lost in thought about Masamune and the future, not where they were going. "It's not you."

Zack looked confused now, but Cloud just glanced out the window at the desert around Midgar as they left Shinra and the city behind. He couldn't stop the mildly helpless feeling in his gut that was growing as they flew on. He knew that changing things would make his knowledge of the future less reliable, but he'd grown used to being semi-omniscient now. That was dangerous, Cloud knew, and now that he recognized it he was angry with himself even more.

"Don't worry, Cloud! It's going to be fine! You'll see!" Cloud offered him a half-smile as a sort of truce.

They flew for several hours, crossing the ocean to the next continent. Cloud had ridden many kinds of flying transports, from Cid's Shera and Highwind to several other dinky little planes. He could recognize the landscape from a plane almost as well as he could from the ground, and as the familiar mountains came closer and closer on the trip, Cloud began to feel a strange mixture of anticipation and dread inside.

Nibelheim.

* * *

The landing was smooth; a far cry from some of the crashes, wrecks, and near misses Cloud had had before. Zack was the first one out, helping Cloud and the other cadet out of their seats. He wasn't even a little wobbly from the flight, and Cloud envied him for that. The other cadet looked ready to throw himself at the ground, and the blond was feeling a little shaky too, his body not used to that kind of travel. At least he was until he lost his train of thought when he saw Sephiroth gracefully dismount from the helicopter and stride out to where the others were landing. Sephiroth against the background of the Nibel Mountains—cold, unmoving sheer cliffs of solid rock that had led many a man to his death—made something heavy and cold lay in his gut.

When they'd all regrouped and everyone with airsickness had emptied their stomachs, one of the First Class SOLDIERs stepped forward. "Cadets, the second and final examination of the SOLDIER Exam begins here, at the edge of the Nibel Mountain Range."

Everyone followed with the requisite awe of the mountains and grumbles of annoyance at a second exam, but it fell quiet after just moments after he'd spoken. They were still feeling the presence of not only so many gathered Firsts but also the top two people in SOLDIER, and it affected the crowd.

"Here your goal is singular: reach Rocket Town on the other side in one week. You'll be given one weapon, one materia, and this ration bag." The SOLDIER explaining this held up the bag to show everyone. Cloud noted how light it looked. Clearly they were expected to find their own food and water. "At midnight of the seventh day, if you have not reached Rocket Town, we return to Midgar without you. Those that are left behind," he had to raise his voice as several cadets murmured about that rule, "will be recovered at a later date."

It was a harsh proclamation, but not unexpected. Cloud could already feel the chill wind coming off the mountains and there was even a dusting of snow on the ground. He knew that Shinra had probably deliberately chosen the Nibel Mountains because it was winter and it was the most dangerous time to be up there. Cadets who couldn't make it to Rocket Town or another village would probably be the ones who were attacked by wildlife, couldn't navigate well enough, or survive in the harsh environment.

"You will begin in one hour. It's up to you how you get there, and whether to work in groups or alone. Those of you who survive will be inducted into SOLDIER."

As everyone began to talk again, Cloud felt a large hand descend on his shoulder and steer him out of the group. "See, home-court advantage." Zack put his arm around Cloud's shoulders and guided him around the helicopter to face the mountains, their back to the rest of the group who were scrabbling to get the heaviest ration bag and the sharpest weapon. No one seemed to have noticed Cloud and Zack sneaking away for a moment.

"I won't try to slip you an extra weapon or materia," Zack began, and Cloud kept his eyes steady on the mountains as he listened. "You grew up here didn't you? Too bad we can't see your hometown. Look, I just wanted to say good luck, not that you need it, and that I'll be waiting for you on the other side with some hot chocolate."

Zack squeezed his shoulders once, and Cloud felt a floundering urge for just a moment to hug Zack. The First would never have rejected it, but it wasn't in the blond's nature to be so affectionate, so he held back and the moment passed. Cloud murmured thanks softly, which Zack waved off as he walked away. He was about to go back around the aircraft and to get his own supplies when the General stepped in front of him from the other side of the helicopter, blocking his escape.

_Fuck._

Cloud slid his foot back to balance himself better automatically. With the helicopter between them and the rest of the group and Zack gone, Cloud suspected Sephiroth might have planned this.

"Hello," his mouth curved up in an echo of a familiar wicked grin, "Cloud."

Something molten in Cloud's stomach jerked at the sound of his name coming off Sephiroth's tongue, but also something darker. His right hand twitched at the familiar phrase, looking for a weapon he didn't have.

"General," Cloud said, but it didn't come out smoothly at all. There was none of the casual authority Sephiroth normally adopted as he approached. The clothing and posture was reminiscent of his insane self, but instead of being manic he was like a coiled spring. It was obvious he was begging Cloud to try and fight his way out of this one; Sephiroth wasn't pretending like he had been this morning.

"You know what I'm here for."

The images that flashed through Cloud's mind would have made him blush if all the blood hadn't drained out of his face earlier. "I don't, no," but it was perfectly obvious he was lying because Cloud unconsciously took a step back. He was nervous because he didn't have a weapon and he didn't know what Sephiroth meant to do. A thousand ideas jumped to mind and then a thousand more. He took another step back, but he almost against the side of the helicopter and knew he had very limited room.

"The amount of inconsistencies that follow you around are, frankly, absurd. Did you think I would let that go?"

Cloud swallowed at the penetrating stare he was getting from Sephiroth, and he could almost feel his heart against his ribcage. The General didn't look prepared to back down at all, and Cloud was afraid to guess how far he would go.

Sephiroth took another step forward, this time coming perilously close to where Cloud was backed up into the chopper. The way the shadows made Sephiroth's whole expression turn a touch crueler forcibly pulled up a hundred memories of the Generals' face drawn in savagery. For a horrible moment Cloud was seeing double, and it didn't help how Sephiroth curled his tongue around Cloud's name. "I will find out Cloud."

Sephiroth's eyes flashed to the left suddenly, and then his whole posture and the intimidating aura reverted back to the normally tightly controlled leader who worked behind a desk. Cloud very nearly thought he had hallucinated the complete change from threatening to normal, and it took several moments for the déjà vu to fade.

"I wanted to personally congratulate you, Strife, on your performance."

Cloud couldn't think up a response, his brain still trying to cope that he suddenly was out of the danger zone—at least temporarily. What had pushed the General so far he would back him up into a helicopter? That wasn't exactly characteristic behavior of the normally collected General; in fact, it was the same behavior Sephiroth had shown when he'd first learned about the experiments.

"I expect," the General continued in that same, overly-calm voice, his eyes still cataloguing everything in a disturbing way, "that you'll be one of the first to return. I would like to speak to you about your performance and personal training then." Cloud didn't miss the obvious threat behind that: _We'll continue this later._

With that, Sephiroth turned and nodded at Zack, who had just appeared around the chopper with a sword and ration bag in hand, unaware of how he'd interrupted Sephiroth's mood. Cloud wanted to slump boneless to the ground with relief as the General strode away, something clipped in his walk that said he wasn't entirely as composed as he had just been pretending. Zack handed Cloud the sword and a materia along with the ration bag, giving the blond a sympathetic look. "Sephiroth's brand of encouragement is a little intimidating, huh?"

Cloud just nodded, swallowing away any words. He didn't even know where to begin, but he didn't want to drag Zack into this anymore than he already was. He wanted to keep his friends for as long as possible.

"Well," Zack gave him a swift once over, obviously restraining his mother-hen instincts from what looked like an imminent bear hug. Cloud was wishing he didn't. "Good luck." With a pat to the back, Cloud heading back to joined the rest of the group waiting by the forest to enter, but for once SOLDIER was the last thing on his mind.

* * *

The forest that covered the Nibel Mountains was unforgiving and very much alive. Despite the cold weather and frequent snows, the trees were thick stalks of bark and sharp branches, and the ground was covered with layers of frozen leaves and dirt that were hard-packed and icy cold. Most of the trees had no acorns or food on them at all, and the thick leaf and pine cover protected most of the animals from would-be hunters.

Cloud had grown up in this world, and though he wouldn't say he was at home here—he had long forsaken the idea of Nibelheim as his home—he was far more knowledgeable here than the city and town boys that made up the rest of the cadets. He'd spent a lot of time in the wilderness with AVALANCHE, and he knew how to survive in pretty much any kind of environment.

Reno, meanwhile, looked distinctly out of his element. He was in the wilds where all his street smarts and tough talk were near useless against the infamous Nibel wolves and the icy winds that shot down from the peaks, blowing snow and pine needles into their faces. He didn't even look to have a thick enough coat, since winter in Midgar was pretty mild.

Cloud had intended to break off on his own, knowing that this second exam offered him the best chance possible to finish up business in Nibelheim long before that dreaded mission came around. As they had trudged off from the starting point into the forest—not near a path even, because that would be too easy—Cloud had been furiously considering everything he could do in Nibelheim in the few short days he had, anything to take his mind off the enigma that was Sephiroth.

Having Reno and Dan tag along would just be a complication. Of course, his attempts to shake them off were for naught. Reno knew he was from the area, and that was enough for his team from the first exam to regroup around him. They clearly believed if they stuck with him they'd survive this in one piece. Which was probably true, but Cloud also knew if they stuck together, they should be fine without him.

The first night out in the woods was a cold one, and Cloud forbade them to make a fire. The smell and light would draw the wolves and they were vicious, especially in the winter when food was scarce. No one had a blanket though, so Aaron was the first to push up into Dan's personal space to generate some warmth.

"How long do you think it'll take to get to the other side?" Dan was shivering in his military-issue flak jacket and boots, rubbing his arms for some semblance of warmth and slowly huddling closer to Aaron.

"Three days at most if they put us on the southwest side of the mountains." Cloud wasn't in the mood for talk. He needed to break from the group, but as their impromptu leader, he had to deal with his conscience saying not to abandon them, and the fact that they always had one eye on him for guidance.

"That's not that long then. I thought it would be farther." John had a thicker coat on than the others, and he hunched with his shoulders together and his hands in his pockets attempting to keep warm. He looked far better off than Reno, who had reluctantly curled into Aaron. Being warm beat being uncomfortable.

Cloud didn't respond, just leaned back against the tree and tried to figure out what he could do. He could tell John or Reno where the pass over the ridge was to reach Rocket Town, but they would want to know why he was leaving, and John might be satisfied with a simple answer, but Reno definitely would not. He spent most of his watch that night thinking about it.

The second day they struck the path that went to the ridge. Hunters and weathered hikers, Cloud explained briefly, used this to get to Rocket Town, but only in the summer when the elements weren't so vicious. It was very likely parts of the path would be covered with heavier snowfall or inaccessible, but so long as they didn't get completely turned around it would take them straight to Rocket Town.

That night they made camp just off the road, and Cloud volunteered for first watch. It wasn't fair of him to leave them during his shift, but the blond didn't feel he had much of a choice. After some deliberation, he wrote a quick note on the back of Reno's hand, saying to follow the road over the ridge, and at the fork take the right turn. Simple, and as long as they didn't run into wolves or eat the poisonous mushrooms, they would be fine. Cloud had to trust they would survive on their own, because there were bigger things had stake.

He shifted his bag on his back, adjusting the dull sword on his waist before setting off down the path. It was chilly tonight, and the trees creaked and moaned ominously in the wind. He followed the footpath until it began to curve, leaving it then to cut a straight line through dense forest. He was more likely to run into monsters this way, but he had a Lightning materia from Zack in case anything big showed up.

He fought off a number of small beasts as he trekked, aware that there seemed to be one or two following him, poorly shadowing where he went. Cloud wasn't worried about them though. The only challenge up in these parts of the woods was the wolves—the famous Nibel dragons didn't fly down this far when there wasn't any food.

* * *

Dan stumbled around a tree, trying to keep far enough away so that the wind and groaning forest would mask his footsteps, but close enough he could still see Cloud. Lying on the cold ground pretending he was falling asleep when really he was wide awake with every owl's call and little animal's scurrying feet, he'd been aware as soon as Cloud started packing up his stuff.

He didn't know what the blond thought he was doing, but Dan didn't believe for a second he could be leaving them. Maybe he was scouting? Or he'd heard something and was going to investigate?

Deciding it had to be the latter, maybe a monster or one of the wolves Cloud had mentioned, Dan had gotten up and followed after him. He wasn't sure why he didn't announce himself or didn't move the moment he heard Cloud packing up his bag. That wasn't like him and he knew it. Still, the cadet found himself falling behind Cloud, ducking behind trees and watching as the blond lazily swiped away the fiends that approached with his sword or even using a little flare of materiato banish the ones that were bigger.

Dan had gasped when the first group of monsters attacked Cloud and had almost run out to help the blond if he'd needed it. Cloud turned out to be more than fine; in fact he seemed annoyed the monsters had even approached. He was more shocked at how calmly Cloud was taking these real-life battles than how he blew through them.

Cloud left the path though, and that was when Dan had gotten lost. All the trees looked the same, and with the ground so frozen solid Cloud left almost no footprints. It was incredibly dark out and cold, and he was beginning to regret going so far after the blond. He obviously didn't mean to come back, but now Dan feared he wasn't going to be able to find his way back either.

Something snapped behind him, and Dan whipped around, blunted sword out and ready to attack. Cloud seemed to have no problem with these little monsters, but Dan had never fought one outside of simulations and the low level ones they brought into the Shinra compound. Out here in the wild—the _wild!_ —Planet only knew what kinds of things were there.

What if it was a wolf? Or a dragon? What if it poisoned him? It might have huge fangs, or a spaded tail; it could kill him in one swing if it were strong enough. And who would find his body? Lost in the Nibel Forest to be eaten by whatever came by next? Dan's hands began to shake as his mind conjured up all the images he didn't want to see. Monsters with mouths so full of fangs they couldn't close them, acid dripping paws, wolves the size of boulders, his body broken and bleeding on the ground…

There was a shadow by a tree on his left, and Dan turned to meet it, sword out in front of him, hands trembling even as he held it. Dan could barely see it, but it almost looked like a figure was leaning against the tree, red eyes glowing.

* * *

As Cloud got closer to the town, the monsters began to give way and the trees began to thin out. He could now make out some of the star-studded sky, the velvet black so complete out here without the lights and smog of Midgar to block it.

Cloud breathed in the air, recalling the bitter tang of pine and the freshness of winter he had given up long ago. The acrid dryness of the desert his self-exile had left him in had nothing on this, though it brought back painful memories with it.

The land began to rise as he walked, and he knew he had to be close. Finally cresting the hill, Cloud put his hand on the trunk of a thin tree, still young compared to the ones deeper into the forest, and looked down. The town of Nibelheim laid stretched out before him: the little cozy houses nestled next to each other, the town hall, the inn where he remembered sleeping once.

He didn't look at the faces of the people in the evening light, or let himself reminisce on the bitter memories of his childhood home. He thought briefly of his mother, nothing more than a warm sensation. He felt love for her, but it wasn't a part of him, distant rather, because he could hardly remember her. Cloud didn't entertain the thought of seeing her. He wasn't ready yet, and he was almost afraid.

His eyes landed upon something else: the Shinra Mansion.


	25. What We Know

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sephiroth and Zack hash out what they know about Cloud, while Cloud finds his way into Shinra Mansion.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Writer's Note: Again, for those of you rereading, the Sephiroth scenes in this chapter have been reworked a lot. Something about his character is awfully hard to grasp, so hopefully I'm doing it justice.

Cloud followed the woods on the fringe of Nibelheim as he made his way to the mansion, being careful to stay out of sight. He walked through the night to get here, and it was morning now, perhaps an hour after dawn, and the air crisp and bitterly cold. He could just make out the shapes of the chimneys of the main center of town where the inn and Tifa's home were, though it was mostly blocked by the smaller homes out here. He deliberately didn't think about his own house and what his mother might be doing right now.

Although he only had foggy memories of his childhood, everything seemed to be the same. The Tudor-style houses were two stories at their highest, with simple wooden designs carved into them, dormer windows peeking into bedrooms, and tall his cover he could see several women gossiping together, probably having just sent their children off to the local schoolhouse.

He'd been forced to stop when the woman drifted closer lest he catch their attention. Nibelheim could be a fairly dangerous place to live, and people who lived near the forest had grown use to keeping an eye out for movement. Cloud could remember a wolf attack as a child that had taken a man's leg.

The women were talking about travelers to the town, three mercenaries who had passed through from the sounds of it. Cloud held perfectly still behind a thick tree trunk as the women walked by, making comments on the men's exotic looks and outfits. The blond managed not to roll his eyes. He had never realized how far removed Nibelheim was from everyone else until he'd reached Midgar and seen his first redhead—everyone in Nibelheim was a brunette or a blonde. This isolation created a sense of "us and them" that has caused the scorn towards his mother for marrying an "outsider". He'd never had much tolerance for that kind of narrow-thinking because of that.

When they finally turned the corner moving back into town, Cloud crept onward, up a small slope following a narrow winding road that led to the side of the Shinra Mansion.

He could already see the brick wall surrounding the building, crumbling at most spots with ivy creeping up the sides. He scaled the wall easily and landed in a tough patch of bushes in the front yard. Cloud crossed the grounds quickly, the grass knee-high and full of garbage, until he came to the rotting, once grand, wooden double doors. Glancing behind him he could see the wrought iron gate, the stairs that led directly into town, and the roof of Tifa's house, smoke rising in spirals from it.

Cloud pushed back any memories of this moment in a different time, and pushed open the doors.

Through the foyer the main hall was exactly as he remembered. A piano lay off to the far left, and the only light was through the dusty and broken windows at the back of the house. The place looked like a haunted mansion with cobwebs everywhere, cracks and holes in the wall, and even a little graffiti from adventurous kids. Much of the furniture was broken and decayed, and everything was covered in a thick layer of dust.

He could see the footprints of monsters on the floor that hadn't been swept in decades and just make out their shapes in the shadows. Only one made to attack him, but his supercharged magic was more than enough for it, and the rest got the hint.

There were two things he needed to do, both in the basement, which was only accessible from the second floor. The first was the files concerning Jenova and Sephiroth's birth and early childhood. Those had to be destroyed, along with the lab there that had later imprisoned him and Zack. Everything had to go. In fact, the whole mansion would probably be better off gone. Then there was Vincent of course. The burning of the place would have to be done after he'd gotten the man out.

Cloud weighed whether to destroy the files or retrieve Vincent first. If he burned the files first, it would send the secret and all the proof to the grave with only Hojo and Cloud knowing. Otherwise he could let Vincent see them to know what happened to his lover and Sephiroth. Would that create more problems for the man, or less? In the end, Cloud knew what it was like to have information withheld from him. Let Vincent see it and make a decision for himself, he determined. He certainly owed the man that much.

Cloud remembered basically the process of freeing Vincent from before. Unfortunately, the combination for the lockbox that had the Basement Key had long since been forgotten. He scoured the balcony of the second floor for the notes Yuffie had first spotted before, then followed their clues to figure out the numbers. It was lucky too because as he went digging around the house he found a couple small treasures, including some equipment and a couple extra materia.

All and all it took him about half an hour to put the whole puzzle back together. Jotted on to the back of one of the notes was the combination. It sounded right to Cloud, so he loosened the strap of his sword and pushed the Lightning materia into the slot on it. The rest he'd have to use by hand since this cheap sword only had one materia slot. Cloud remembered the safe and the battle from before, but he knew what to expect this time, which would make it much easier. He felt pretty confident going in, but he also vividly recalled that brawl he and Reno had gotten into with the other cadets. It was best to keep a realistic mindset in something that could spell his death if it went bad.

Upstairs he input the combination, and with the final click of the lock threw the door open.

* * *

"Zackary."

"Yeah, Seph?"

"There's something I wish to discuss with you."

Zack nodded, putting his drink down and excusing himself from the conversation with the Seconds. Following Sephiroth's smooth gait, they went up the stairs of the Rocket Town inn and into the General's private room.

"What's up?" Zack asked, passing through the small living area and straight into the bedroom, flopping down on the bed. He could tell it was something fairly serious by the way Sephiroth followed him, grim-faced and still wearing his armor. He'd been off a little recently, but Zack hadn't been sure if it was just the exams and Hojo or something more. It was shaping up to be something bigger though.

"It's Strife."

"I knew this was going to come up," Zack said. "Alright," he clapped his hands, "let's get to it."

Sephiroth settled into the desk chair of the bedroom. "I merely meant to discuss the… inconsistencies of cadet Strife."

Zack waved his words away. Personal feelings aside they _did_ need to have this conversation. "You and I both know Cloud's a little funny. Between us I'm sure we can come up with something." He scooted back on the bed until he was resting against the wall and toed his boots off. He wiggled his socked feet and sighed. "Okay, so we'll start at the beginning."

Zack didn't immediately start talking though. "You met Strife first," Sephiroth provided.

"Yeah, yeah. I didn't notice anything weird until I really first talked to him though. I remember asking him about his sword techniques. You remember we talked about it right before I pulled him out of dinner? Yeah, he didn't really talk much…" Zack drifted for a moment, obviously recalling the conversation, "I remember how neat his bed was."

Sephiroth's eyebrows rose a little, thinking of his own pressed sheets _._ "You find a neat bed to be strange?"

"Cloud's seventeen!"

Sephiroth just shook his head. "Cloud, as far as a basic psychological profile offers, is much more mature than an average seventeen-year-old. Considering he also has no father according to records, he probably shouldered more responsibility as a child, thereby contributing to his introverted personality. This may also account for his self-control, leadership qualities, and lack of sociability."

Zack mused on that for a couple moments as Sephiroth fell silent. "Psychology all aside, yeah he's mature for a teenager, but it's kind of weird how Cloud just suddenly came up on the radar. That's what bothers me the most."

"Mm."

Zack rubbed the back of his neck, looking a little pained as he thought about it. Sephiroth knew it frustrated him to no end sometimes. Something about Cloud had just… popped up, where he'd been easily relegated to the background before. Zack seemed unable to pin down the moment though or why.

"I believe," Sephiroth said abruptly, "you brought him to my office not long after you initiated contact."

"Yeah, but sheesh, you make it sound like a mission. Cloud's not some monster I ran into in a mercenary base." Zack rolled his eyes, but Sephiroth was more interested in the details of that first meeting.

"That was an… odd encounter."

"Oh yeah," Zack said, starting to smile as he remembered it. "He'd taken what, two steps and then looked like he might bolt?"

"I recall that meeting distinctly because it didn't end that way."

"He just… You could actually see him screw his courage up." Zack said, clearly remembering the moment with as much clarity as Sephiroth. "Never seen something quite like that before."

Sephiroth leaned back again from where he'd moved to rest his elbow on his knee. "It showed a backbone I would not have guessed at. He did not seem a cadet then."

"I often forget he is. He seems a lot older and he's so serious. You got a psychological answer to explain that?" Zack said laughingly.

"Perhaps."

When Sephiroth didn't elucidate, Zack groaned. "You're not gonna tell me, are you?"

"Not yet."

"Fine, let's hurry this up then. Dinner's soon."

Sephiroth ignored the comment as Zack shifted on the bed. "Well I started training Cloud, and he's pretty damn talented. Don't know why it didn't show in class, but maybe the atmosphere or teaching methods or something don't work for him—I have no idea. He picked it up really fast, never really complained, practically already knew…the…stuff." Zack's eyes went comically wide before he narrowed them at the General. "You think he already knew it. Really knew it."

Sephiroth's sharp eyes met Zack's. "At least the same basic swordplay training all SOLDIERs get, yes, if not more."

"I figured he'd had informal training or something, but… he didn't tell me."

Sephiroth's tone had a harder edge to it as he spoke. "Ideally there is a good reason for that, but you must remember, he is obviously deft at concealing things. It took half a year for anyone to realize his potential. As you noted, his obvious talent was completely overlooked in the cadet classes. Perhaps we are only noticing now because he realized his reliance on the shadows would jeopardize his chances at SOLDIER."

Zack looked like he instantly wanted to defend his trust in Cloud, but with a harder look from Sephiroth, refrained. "I won't say it," he sighed, looking away, "but you know how I feel about it."

"Your loyalty is what makes you an admirable SOLDIER, Zack."

"Uh huh, I'm not going to be swayed by flattery, Seph. Not even from you."

Sephiroth squished the impulse to roll his eyes and decided to move on. "There was the materia incident where he burned a hole in a metal door,and I believe you've now indicated two instances where his behavior was…similar to mine on occasion, in your own words."There was something rueful in Sephiroth's tone.

Zack sighed and rubbed the top of his head, shooting a look at Sephiroth who ignored it. "Well, the materia thing never happened again so I figure it was a one-time thing. I did offer to practice with him on it, especially if he managed something like that, but he said he didn't really have much interest in materia, and that move drained him dry for two days."

Sephiroth nodded, and Zack just shrugged. The Lieutenant General didn't have much talent for materia, so it was questionable what he would have been able to learn about Strife anyway.

"As for the Seph-moments," and the General narrowed his eyes slightly, but Zack just winked at him, "that first one was on his birthday. He was just angry—hotly angry, like you wouldn't believe. I didn't find out what caused it though. Sly bastard got me talking about Aeris over dinner, and somehow he got away before I could pry the rest out. I brought it up again later, but he really didn't want to talk about it, and I didn't want to push him too far."

Zack shrugged again, but he was definitely chewing on something. Sephiroth waited it out, knowing that Zack's friendship with Strife was warring with his desire to understand the cadet too. Any lightheartedness disappeared from the conversation though as the seconds dragged.

"The second was with Kunsel." Zack let that hang for a moment, because they both knew what he was referring to. "What makes it possible for a seventeen year old kid to turn to stone like that? I swear, you could have murdered a kitten in front of him and he wouldn't have twitched. I've seen guys try to be impassive in the face of adversity, but nothing like that. _Nothing_ like that. It's not normal."

Zack shook his head, and that last statement summed Cloud up really. It wasn't normal. Strife had moments where he didn't conform to any idea of normal for his age group, background, and personality. Sephiroth had reviewed all the other interviews, and not one boy had been half as composed as Cloud had been. Not to mention Kunsel was often called in to interrogate Third Class SOLDIERs and up, and many of _them_ didn't hold up well for long. That spoke of experience; Sephiroth would have leaned towards abuse, if he hadn't seen Cloud's reaction first hand beside that helicopter that morning. Strife had seen something, lived something.

They sat like that for a couple of minutes turning over ideas silently, and eventually Zack spoke again. "There's one more thing. I… I think someone died." Zack murmured softly. Talking about death had always been hard for the First, especially recently. "Someone important to him."

Sephiroth didn't outwardly react, but he wasn't sure what angle Zack was coming from. Grief did a lot of things to people, but teaching someone to be unemotional under extreme stress? Not likely. "It is obvious there is a slim chance it is anyone we know."

"It was when I showed him Galatine. Just two days after his… livid Seph-moment." It was a weak joke, and Sephiroth watched Zack carefully. The First seemed to be spilling out his real thoughts after several weeks of silence following Kunsel's declaration of suspicion. "He looked really shocked and…upset. Just a flash, but after working with you, well, it was enough."

"Because of the sword?"

"No, no. I told him I might give it to him if something happened to me. He looked… horrified at the thought. Really… horrified." Sephiroth turned back to the window after a moment, and Zack remained silent for several long seconds before speaking again. "When he found out I was being deployed that time to fight AVALANCHE, he was worried for me. Which, you know, is normal too." However, Zack's brows were drawn down, and he seemed to be thinking of something more, but he didn't say what.

"You think the person who taught him… died? And there's more to it than that?"

Sephiroth stood up from the chair to pace. "Yes."

* * *

Cloud panted and stumbled into the wall, slumping down it in exhaustion. Thank the Planet for the magic ability, because he'd forgotten what a totally one-sided fight felt like from the losing side, especially in a cramped room.

He'd managed to kill the half of Lost Number that was a physical fighter with materia, but the magic-using side of it was highly resistant. In the end he'd had to resort to locking the beast inside the room and barricading the door. The room was sealed to prevent the monster from using magic to burn down the building or escaping, but Cloud didn't hold his breath—that sealing was at least twenty years old.

Cloud remained sitting on the floor, waiting for his heart rate to slow back down. He'd barely managed to paralyze the creature long enough to get the Odin materia and the Basement Key out of the box before it began to shake off the effects. He tucked the materia into his bag now, since a summon was better to use out in the open and he wasn't sure how his super-magic would affect it.

When he was sufficiently recovered, Cloud crossed the second floor into the bedroom and unlocked the secret passageway down to the basement. This was the most difficult part of this entire venture, and one he had been trying and failing to mentally prepare himself for.

The gaping maw of the basement was cold and dusty, the stairs creaking and popping under his feet. When he descended to the bottom he could just make out the faint glow at the end of the stone hallway—sickly green. Cloud's skin began to crawl and burn, but outwardly he refused to show it. He could only wish his impassivity would quell the turning of his stomach.

Sword out, taking each step at a time, Cloud drew towards the door on the left that led to Vincent. His eyes were drawn to the pale light in the library and attached lab, but after fumbling in the dark with the Basement Key, Cloud pulled his eyes away and slid the key into the tumbler. The room beyond was stuffy with mold and dust, frigidly cold and eerie. Coffins were piled up all over the room, leaning against the wall and stacked up on one another. The center coffin drew Cloud's eyes.

The lid was quite snug, but with some leverage from another coffin against the wall, Cloud managed to shove it off. It clattered to the floor, but Cloud only heard it distantly as his eyes locked with Vincent's.

* * *

Zack snapped back to the conversation, no doubt trying to stop thinking about his own mentor. "Anything else strange you can think of?" Zack began to tick things off his fingers. "We have training, his birthday—still can't believe he didn't tell me—the office, the interrogation—we'll get to that one—and apparently the neat bed."

"There was an incident at a vending machine."

"Oh?" Zack sat up, losing all sense of the solemn mood, looking quite curious and maybe even a little devious. That expression never bode well for Sephiroth. "What were you doing down by the cadet's barracks' vending machine?"

"It was the training stalls one, and quite late. When I surprised him he instinctively attacked me." Sephiroth didn't seem all that perturbed by it, but Zack's whole expression turned from humor to near outrage.

"He _attacked_ you?! And you didn't tell me?"

"Relatively. It was a reflexive punch. Frankly, I wasn't surprised given that you had already intimated suspicions about his prior training. He, however, was surprised by it and… embarrassed."

Zack sat back. "Huh."

"He recovered, but remained tense and on high alert throughout the exchange."

Zack seemed to sense the words that weren't coming forth. "However…" he prodded.

Sephiroth looked at him directly, "You are withholding something from me, so I will do the same."

"You're kidding, right?" Zack sounded shocked. Planet, the General could be such a kid sometimes. Zack liked to think he had something to do with it when it wasn't annoying him.

"Your first meeting with him." Sephiroth stated.

Zack winced. "Well, there are some personal things I don't think I should share without his permission…"

"Zack-" Sephiroth tried before he was cut off.

"It's not related, really."

Sephiroth looked disbelieving, but after a beat rolled his eyes. "As I said before, Fair, your loyalty is what makes you such an admirable SOLDIER."

Zack waved away anything else Sephiroth might have said, ignoring the General's somewhat backhanded compliment. "If there's anyone hiding something, it's Cloud."

"Indeed. I spoke with him after the interrogation also."

Zack sat up sharply. "What? You didn't tell me that."

Sephiroth sighed at Zack's alarm and resisted the urge to pinch his nose to stem the oncoming headache. He'd reviewed that entire short interview over and over in his head. He couldn't remember why he'd let the boy go or what he'd been thinking when he'd leaned over him like that. It was a highly intimate and personal intimidation method Sephiroth had rarely employed before.

He knew why, but he hated to think he'd given in to his emotions like that.

"He said he didn't know what he was hiding," Sephiroth admitted. "He was highly embarrassed and tense throughout the interview."

Zack frowned, his brow pulled together like he wanted to say something but couldn't. Sephiroth had a nasty feeling he and Zack were both hiding the same thing about Cloud.

* * *

Vincent's eyes were sharp as ever in the gloom of the basement, even glowing slightly. Cloud sat back on his heels as Vincent sat up in the coffin.

"Your name is Vincent Valentine," he began, his skin starting to prickle at the harsh glare Vincent was shooting him. Or maybe it was just the dust settling on his skin. "You were a Turk shot by Hojo and used for experimentation. You've been crossed with several demons and have locked yourself into this room and slept in that coffin to punish yourself for failing to protect someone you loved."

Vincent showed no confusion, and Cloud hadn't been expecting any. "It's been twenty-five years since you went to sleep in this coffin. Sephiroth, Lucrecia's son, is still alive."

At that there was a strange fleeting emotion behind Vincent's eyes but Cloud couldn't identify it before it passed.

"I'm Cloud Strife. I need your help."

* * *

The sunlight was just breaking into the trees when Aaron stirred awake. He blearily looked around the campsite, catching sight of John rousing slowly and Reno still asleep. Aaron was about to shut his eyes again when he realized he didn't see Dan or Cloud.

He sat up abruptly and took stock of the campsite. Two of their members were missing. "John, do you know where Cloud or Dan is?"

John blinked a couple of times before he seemed to realize what Aaron was saying. Looking around too, he cursed and struggled to stand up. "They had to have left. Or something happened to them."

Aaron and John quickly found Dan's bag, tucked beside some leaves where he'd been sleeping, but Cloud's things were all gone. John began to pack up as Aaron went to wake Reno. They needed to figure out a plan for what to do about their two missing members.

* * *

"Is there anything else? I can't remember anything more." Zack was sniffing the air like a dog, the warm scent of chicken pot pie and mashed potatoes wafting up the stairs to them. "Oh wait, I think he's flown before." Sephiroth cocked his head a little bit. "He didn't look too bothered by the helicopter."

"Perhaps he simply wasn't afraid."

"Okay, fine, maybe that's a little weak. But I remember the first time I got into one of those things. Scared me."

Sephiroth shook his head, but dutifully tucked the information away in his brain. "I have two more instances."

" _Two_? Sheesh, Seph, it sounds like you talk to Cloud almost as much as I do."

"Before getting on the helicopters this morning I spoke with him. I wanted to…see if he might slip something. It was clear he was hung-over and completely unprepared."

"Since we're discussing this, I guess he didn't tell you anything."

"No, though I will admit that I was… not myself this morning. It may have bled into the encounter, but it led to the next one.

"The next one? If that was this morning, then you mean before the second test started?" Zack asked carefully, watching Sephiroth stop pacing finally and stand by the window.

"When we landed, I cornered Strife. My intention was to remind him that I am expecting an answer to all these questions—and to do so in an alternate method from prior meetings. Strife is… resilient to cajoling, direct questioning, and gentle prying." Sephiroth's eyes slid over to Zack, who was looking hesitantly at Sephiroth.

"Well?"

Sephiroth sharpened his look at Zack. "I believe we both know a point of Cloud's weakness."

Zack blinked.

"However, I do not want to take advantage of it unless it becomes absolutely necessary. It would be unfair, not to mention in poor taste."

Zack's expression became suspicious. "What did you do to him?"

Sephiroth turned away, and this time he did pinch the bridge of his nose. "Intimidated him with size, forwardness, aggressive posture, and implied threats."

Now Zack just looked confused. "But he didn't tell you anything."

"I simply meant to show him his time was running short. The effect was stronger than anticipated and his reaction genuine."

"So… what's this weakness we both mutually know that I don't think I actually know?"

Sephiroth released his nose and exhaled. "Basic psychological profile: High levels of responsibility and pressure all his life forcing him to grow up quickly. Likely bullied as a child contributing to a need to prove himself along with an emotionless façade to protect a fragile self-esteem—this is not to be confused with what occurred in the interview, as that goes far beyond a façade. Major loss early in life _,_ most likely never fully accepted _,_ that led to general mistrust of others and/or outright rejection of them causing issues with sociability. This does not, however, explain his ability to totally shut down emotion under duress, as the variables for how that came to be are too numerous at the moment, even if the theory of his mentor's unresolved death is true." He rattled off the list of attributes to describe Cloud like he was reading it from a textbook, and there was stunned silence from his audience as he paused to take a breath.

Zack honestly didn't know what to think except Sephiroth and Cloud probably shared a lot more than a few meaningless conversations. He wasn't sure what to think of that, since this was _Sephiroth_ and the man didn't _converse_ normally at all.

The General wasn't done though. "What attracts people like this is power because they've lacked it in childhood or adolescence, acknowledgement from someone held in respect as a means of boosting they're lacking self-esteem, and either someone _to_ control or to be controlled _by_ —either because they fear losing control or prefer trusted others to be in control, presumably because they feel unworthy, inept, or afraid when shouldering large responsibility."

Zack was slack-jawed, staring at Sephiroth who looked completely calm.

"He is attracted to me."

Zack snorted suddenly, waving away all shock, the General's clearly defined psychological profile, and Cloud's aforementioned 'weakness'. "Anyone with eyes is attracted to you, Seph. I am, practically everyone in SOLDIER is. Sure, some of it is because people want to play with fire but that's inevitable. It only bothers you now because it's _Cloud_."

Sephiroth looked like he was about to interject with more book rhetoric but Zack stood up quickly.

"No. I think Cloud doesn't like you for those reasons; they're superficial. So you're powerful, respected, he's got some kind of complex from childhood, blah blah blah. Everyone gets a hard-on from that, and we've all got problems. But, you know, the first time I really talked to Cloud, I could tell there was more to it than that. He remembered you're _human_."

Sephiroth didn't move, but Zack just plowed on, this time pointing and waving his finger at him. There was no rank between them at the moment, just stubborn friendship. "You're denying it because you don't know how to deal with it. You find him intriguing, and you can't lie and say it doesn't turn you on a bit. I know how puzzles are with you, Seph. Cloud's defying any attempt to make sense and you like it. Nothing gives you a challenge now, so when you find one you go berserk. There's psychology for you."

Zack was just winding up when Sephiroth slowly turned to the window, not in dismissal, but resignation. Sighing, Zack came up behind his friend and kept talking, his voice quieter now.

"Come on, Seph. There's nothing wrong with it." Zack didn't move any closer or touch him, just remained a steady presence there. Sephiroth would not be swayed, but he'd come around in his own time. "Hey, he asked me that first day if you were sleeping enough," Zack suddenly added, remembering that detail. "Everyone knows what an insomniac you are sometimes, and he bothered to ask. It's gotta mean something. If anything, that Cloud's more than some groupie, and you already knew that."

"It's inappropriate," Sephiroth tried after a prolonged moment of silence. It was a token argument and they both knew it.

"Bullshit. He'll be a SOLDIER in hours and age won't matter; he's of consent anyway."

Zack didn't get to continue proving his point when the clumping of boots on the stairs began and the sounds of a Second approaching.

"This isn't over," Zack said, a warning in his voice. He knew this chance wasn't going to come around for a while again.

Sephiroth turned to Zack as there was a polite knock on the door and a call for dinner. "That's what I told Cloud."


	26. The Mountains Have Eyes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cloud's on a mission, but for the rest of his team things are not going so smoothly at all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Writer's Note: There were a lot of inconsistencies with Aaron's story in this chapter, so some bits and pieces have been added so it actually holds a little water. The rest is just the typical cleaning and tweaking.

Cloud stood up and backed away as Vincent rose from the coffin. The man didn't look the least bit surprised or perturbed that someone had disturbed his sleep, but Cloud knew Vincent was discerning as ever, and the ex-Turk didn't trust him for second.

Vincent looked the same as he would in a couple years when Cloud had freed him last time. He still sported the red cape, the pointed gold boots, and the matching claw. His hair was a lank, black mass that made his pale skin and sharp cheekbones look a little insidious in the poor light. It wasn't surprising Yuffie had cried vampire when she first saw him. Amazingly, other than a little dirty looking and the hair a little unwashed, he was perfectly fine after twenty-five years in a coffin.

Cloud brushed dust off his knees and shoulders. "I'll explain more, but first I have to do something," was all he said as he walked out.

* * *

"Where's Cloud and Dan?" Reno was barely awake enough to comprehend Aaron's question.

"Piss?"

He was rubbing his eyes, so he didn't see the scathing look Aaron sent him. "With his bags?" Reno ignored the comment, reaching to grab his canteen when he noticed the slightly smudged writing on his hand. He recognized the handwriting.

Well, damn. Cloud could be a real bastard sometimes.

He closed his fist, deciding this was going to be added to that growing list of things to ask Cloud the next time he cornered the blond.

"They must have left," John put in from where he was standing on the other side of the campsite. He was wandering around the area looking for tracks, scuffmarks, or anything really. He had Dan's bag in one hand, but there wasn't even evidence Cloud had sat down to rest.

"Something had to have taken them. They wouldn't just leave." Aaron was tugging on his hair in distress. "Do you think they're picking us off?"

"Cloud probably went off to be a hero," Reno said a bit roughly. He still wasn't quite fully there. "Either to save Dan, or the kid followed him."

John frowned at him as he shouldered his pack. "We can't stick around too long here if they were nabbed nearby. Let's look around the forest a bit more for tracks, but I doubt we'll find much." He nodded to a cold pan of food. "We left some for you, Reno."

"Cold oatmeal, my favorite," he muttered under his breath.

Five minutes later, Reno had scarfed down his food and packed everything up. The forest held no clues though as to Cloud or Dan's whereabouts, but they agreed they'd left willingly. However they couldn't agree on whether they'd been lured away or taken off on their own. Reno clenched one fist as they took to the trail again.

"Do we know where to go now?" Aaron asked.

"Path splits somewhere ahead of us," Reno answered. "We take the right fork."

"How do you know?" John asked.

Reno opened his hand and held it in front of his body so they couldn't see. "Cloud's a bastard, that's how."

* * *

With a little help from a sledgehammer, Cloud had destroyed well over twenty empty mako-tanks, and there were still two more rooms filled with them.

Vincent had followed him to the library without a word, and Cloud took that as a good sign. Previously Vincent hadn't even stood up from the coffin until mention of Sephiroth.

Even though there were self-destruct sequences built into all Hojo's machines because of the man's unwavering paranoia, Cloud preferred to do this by hand. It might have been a vindication of sorts, a way to get back at all of Hojo's maniacal work in both the future and the past, and present to be exact; but Cloud needed to make sure the deed was done, if only for his own sake.

He just barely heard the wisp of cloth and the crunch of glass under metal boot as he stepped towards the next mako pod. Cloud heard the unasked question.

"The Planet. A year from now Hojo locked me here." He swung, as livid as if it had happened yesterday. The pod exploded in a shower of glass. Cloud had made sure to drain them before his rampage, unwilling to get any mako on him if he could.

"For five years." He swung again, this time at the pipes and computer that operated the pod. This one burst into a volley of sparks and electrical wires.

"I was an experiment."

The next pod broke under the swing, Cloud grunting at his connected.

" _Reunion_."

Vincent was paused to let Cloud destroy the next console system. "Jenova Reunion Theory."

"Exactly." The mechanics behind the machine groaned and the pipes writhed like they were alive as all the pressure was suddenly released. Cloud moved on without looking back. "The Reunion happened. I killed Sephiroth, who was a puppet of Jenova. The other experiments were his clones—attempts to make more of the 'perfect SOLDIER'."

Cloud said it with such loathing that the next hit smashed the motherboard of the room into two large pieces and a hundred small ones. Cloud swung a second time to ensure it's utter destruction.

"The remnants were considered failures. But it wasn't over." He stopped then, breathing hard and leaning on the sledgehammer, but didn't turn around. "The Planet had destroyed Meteor and we—AVALANCHE—had taken out Jenova. But the Planet grew ill. Geostigma they called it. And Sephiroth came back."

Cloud turned now and began to walk back, towards the doorway where Vincent stood. He dragged the sledgehammer behind him, and it scrapped the floor in an eerie, high-pitched whine. Cloud didn't seem to notice.

"The Planet was dying. Even when we destroyed him a second time—another Reunion—it was too much. And the Planet did the only thing it could." Cloud shrugged. He'd gotten over that initial anger and betrayal when Aeris had told him what happened. He could almost understand, but he hadn't forgiven it yet.

"…And you're here." Vincent finished smoothly, as though time-travel wasn't a perfectly absurd concept.

Cloud couldn't help the small well of relief inside him. He had felt that if there were anyone who would take him at face value, it would be the ex-Turk, and he was glad he was right.

"Yes."

* * *

Reno, John, and Aaron had been walking since dawn, stopped for a quick lunch break, and continued on until they heard voices up ahead of them. There was a quiet argument over whether to ambush and take out the team—Reno's idea—just sneak by—Aaron's—or to try and steal their stuff—John. Without Cloud to break the three-way tie with his typical take-no-prisoners leadership style, the three agreed to sneak up on the other group and see if they could even ambush or rob them, or whether Aaron's idea wasn't the smartest one.

The team they came upon was Maxwell's, as irony would have it, except the boy himself was missing and his teammates were standing around like a pack of lost sheep.

"What's going on?" John hissed from where he was crouched next to Reno in the underbrush. They were watching the team from a stone's throw away hidden in the heavy undergrowth.

"Where's Maxwell?" Reno responded.

"Who's there?" Shouted one kid suddenly, spinning to face the opposite side of the forest where Aaron was hidden. "Max? That you?"

Everyone turned then, and Reno let out an annoyed hiss as Aaron stepped out from the trees with both arms up. "It's me, Aaron. I overheard you guys lost someone."

Reno and John crept forward as the boys pointed their knives and one handgun at Aaron, eyeing him suspiciously. "I bet you had something to do with that!" One yelled, and the others started to walk forward menacingly.

"No, no, you've got it all wrong," Aaron said cheerfully. "See, two of our members, Cloud and Dan, both disappeared last night. We figured something similar must have happened to you."

Reno audibly groaned as he stepped on to the path with John, Maxwell's team whirling around to confront them too. "You lost two people?" One guy asked, his knife lowering a little.

"Disappeared in the night. No trace." Aaron supplied helpfully.

"It's true," Reno put in, since it was too late to back out of this mess. "We thought they'd left on their own, but maybe something drew them out if you guys lost Maxwell too. That can't be coincidence."

The guy with the handgun eyed Reno and John. "You think it's deliberate?"

John nodded, trying not to look threatening. The guy with the gun was looking a little edgy with that trigger-finger. Everyone could tell it was not a paintball gun, and SOLDIER was serious about this test. "Three people go missing in twenty-four hours? Especially the leaders of two groups?"

After a long moment, the cadet slowly lowered the gun. The others followed suit after a moment of hesitation. Aaron looked perfectly unaffected, but John could see Reno's shoulders relax just a bit.

"Max was looking for some food in the bushes," the boy indicated with a thumb over his shoulder. "Went into the forest and didn't come back. We looked for him, but we found his gun," the one he was holding his held up sideways in a passive manner. "Don't know what happened."

"Woke up this morning and Cloud and Dan were gone. Could've been lured off by something." Reno rubbed the ink on his hand off on his shirt, looking deliberately nonchalant about the whole thing. "If they're picking people off—especially the good ones—then we'd be better off in numbers."

John had to struggle to hide his surprise that _Reno_ would be the one to offer a temporary truce. He'd been expecting him or Aaron would be the ones to bring it up. Maybe Cloud was rubbing off on him more than anyone thought.

The guy with the gun was probably thinking the same thing, but he was a lot more skeptical of Reno's intentions. "Sure I wanna believe you?"

Reno shrugged, "Sure. After all, I know which fork up there goes to Rocket Town and which'll leave you with your ass out in the cold."

"You can search around the forest if you want, we're not lying," Aaron suddenly said. "Dan and Cloud are both gone. We've been by ourselves since dawn. If you don't want to lose more people, I'd recommend sticking together. Plus, we're in the deepest parts of the woods. Less people means more animals."

From Aaron's voice and manner made it seem as though he wasn't the least bit perturbed by anything he was implying, but one of Maxwell's team shuddered slightly. The new leader looked resigned. "We had a run-in with a wolf last night. Max barely got a bullet into the thing's shoulder before it took a chunk out of a tree. Ripped it near in half. Ain't no joke."

John nodded. "Cloud warned us the Nibel wolves are dangerous."

Reno rolled his eyes and tucked his hands in his pockets. "We gonna move or what people? If Maxwell got nabbed right here, someone might be hanging around."

* * *

When Cloud returned to the library finally, Vincent was seated at Hojo's desk with numerous papers spread out before him. None of them were about himself; unsurprisingly all were about Sephiroth.

"He never mutated." Vincent didn't really ask questions, Cloud had learned after years of travel with him.

The blond sat down in an overturned chair, though he didn't feel tired. Anxious. Anticipatory maybe _._ "No. The only negative side-affect of having the Jenova cells was a general mental deterioration. All the numbered experiments were mindless drones for the most part. Sephiroth didn't even show signs of it until he made contact with Jenova, and even then he became more violent, not helpless."

"You were not."

Cloud stared past Vincent into the dark bowels of the library. He didn't want to think about it. "No. And the Remnants that returned with Geostigma weren't either."

Vincent put the paper down. "You're going to burn it," he said in his usual monotone.

"Yes."

There was a pause as Vincent seemed to consider saying something else, but then stood up and walked out without another word. In the bygone future Vincent had known when Cloud could be argued with and when he couldn't, and it seemed he knew that now too.

Cloud sat in the chair a moment longer, reflecting only briefly on what he had to do. Then he too left the library, and standing in the doorway took out the Fire materia. He sent a strong pulse of magic to it, one of the most powerful ones he'd done yet, and watched with steady eyes as the flames licked up all of Hojo's work.

* * *

"Maybe it's just like with the drug interrogations. Picking us off one at a time to make us scared. Probably moved Cloud and Dan off somewhere else on their own to freak 'em out." Reno was just thinking aloud, throwing out every possibility he could think of.

"I heard about that drug bust," John put in. They were walking uphill along the path, surrounded by trees. It was a fairly boring journey, if a little tiring, and the tree cover hid most of the scenery, not that anyone particularly cared. The rest of the group followed behind, the one with the handgun at rearguard. "The official report was bullshit, but from what I've heard, there were some minor budget cuts to the science department. Some of the scientists apparently leaked mako-laced drugs into the slums for extra cash."

Reno's mouth dropped open _._ "So it was bad luck some cadets had it?"

"Yup."

"Huh."

* * *

Vincent and Cloud left the Shinra Mansion, recovering a simple revolver for Vincent to use as they did. Cloud started another small fire in the piano room, and when the flames were hot enough, the magical shield that kept the Lost Number from burning the rest of the house broke. It took mere moments for whatever was left of the mansion to rise up in flames.

They trekked up the mountainside together. Cloud knew the path well, and other than running into a handful of monsters that even Vincent's rusty skills could easily deal with, it was a smooth trip to the bridge.

As they walked, Cloud filled Vincent in on the details. He told him about AVALANCHE, about his mixed memories and chasing Sephiroth across the world, about Meteor and the Planet, and then the three remnants and destroying the fallen General again. Through it all Vincent asked no questions and offered no commentary. It was cathartic for Cloud, whose voice was flatly monotone for most of it, but occasionally would grow gruff at the mention of Aeris' death and the fights with Sephiroth. He only touched on his captivity with Hojo once to explain Zack's death, but he skirted his own past for the most part. Vincent could well understand that.

The ex-Turk hadn't doubted Cloud's honesty for long. Though initially more than a little shocked to find a teenager opening his coffin, there has been little room for doubt of Cloud's authenticity following that. It was only confirmed by Cloud's mastery of materia, his obvious knowledge of highly classified information, and the story.

That skeleton of belief was only filled in more as Vincent had the opportunity to watch Cloud in action. He moved with a fluidity, confidence, and strength that Vincent saw very rarely and only in the most seasoned of fighters. It would be impossible for Cloud to be a mere cadet and fight like that, not to mention his frightening maturity and even resignation that only those who had seen war carried.

Also, _Chaos_ knew it was the truth.

The beast was run by its instincts; it didn't have doubts, coherent complicating thoughts or questions. It followed pure primordial instinct, which made it so repulsive to an analytical mind like Vincent's, but also one that, occasionally, knew something he didn't. Chaos,Vincent had long ago hypothesized, was tied to the Planet through a much closer connection than humans. Even with the mako in his system, Vincent could not feel the Planet as a humming string through his being the way Chaos interpreted it.

The demon knew instinctively that Cloud was connected to the Planet. It was restless in Vincent's mind, bothrepelled and drawn to Cloud, feeling the Planet _alive_ in the SOLDIER cadet. It would be difficult to render the feeling in words, but Vincent knew inherently through Chaos that Cloud was not an ordinary man.

Vincent had little doubt Cloud's memories were true enough. Whether Cloud physically came back in time, or whether the memories of a possibly future were passed to him and he believed he had lived it, it didn't matter. Vincent wanted to atone, and Cloud was not only offering him a way to do this—to save Lucrecia's son from a potentially terrible death—but also to exact revenge upon the man who had started this all: Hojo.

* * *

Reno seemed convinced there would be no more abductions, although John wasn't completely sold by his performance. They'd gotten Cloud and Maxwell, the leaders, and probably Dan inadvertently, so it was possible it was over, but everyone was still very jumpy. It wasn't clear how anyone had been taken or why no one had noticed, but it was a great scare tactic.

The whole group was now seven people. Maxwell's team had gotten lucky on the weapon draw. There had only been two handguns and Maxwell had gotten one. The fact that it was left unfired on the ground didn't bode well, but no one said what they suspected out loud. Aaron had shot Reno a warning look when he'd started to broach the subject, and a swift elbow to the gut was enough to silence him.

"Hey," John said suddenly. "Turn around."

Reno and the others did slowly. They were on the top of a ridge of some kind, but with all the trees it was difficult to see anything. Still, Reno looked up to where John was pointing to see a column of smoke twirling lazily into the sky.

"Looks like a fire," one of the guys said.

"No shit," Reno said reflexively.

"It's not in Rocket Town's direction," Aaron pointed out. "It's down the mountains. It must be Nibelheim."

"You wanna bet Cloud's behind that?"

John shook his head and started walking again. "Is everything with Cloud a conspiracy to you?"

Reno shrugged; no one else seemed to be putting the pieces together. "Pretty much."

* * *

The smoke from the burning mansion was clearly visible from the steps of the mako reactor. It had taken over an hour to make it all the way up the snowy mountainside and across the bridge that had nearly tumbled Tifa to her death. Vincent's cheeks weren't even pink from the cold or the exertion, and Cloud envied the man's enhancements had for a moment before he checked himself.

The reactor was exactly the same as he remembered. Rusted and frozen on the outside turning it an ugly shade of red, with sheer metal exterior, the twisted pipes and mechanisms high above them, and the same "no trespassing" and "hazardous materials inside" signs postedevery few feet. It was at least three to four stories tall, a harsh, modern contraption in the middle of the wilderness.

Cloud willed away any memories of this place, steeling himself for the grisly images he would undoubtedly be bombarded with. This was not, by any means, a place he would willingly come to again.

Vincent was a silent presence behind him as he stepped into the main room. Two-dozen mako pods of considerably size were laid out on various raised levels. Cloud already knew what was inside them, and he didn't waste time looking at them. The same stairs Zack had been thrown down—Cloud's shoulders stiffened as he focused on a nail on the floor until it was all he could see—led up to a metal door with an archway engraved with the word "Jenova".

* * *

It was another two hours of walking before Rocket Town came into view. It was only the tip of the giant rocket that gave the town its name, but it was the first guaranteed sign they were going in the right direction. It was still a ways off, down the side of the mountain range on a road that twisted and writhed all the way to the base. John estimated it would take most of the day to get down that, and they would lose sight of the town as they descended, so they decided a break was in order.

"I'm gonna take a shit." Reno wandered over to where Aaron was off from the rest of the team.

The other boy nodded, waving his hand at Reno as he fished in his bag for his canteen. "Sure, sure. Should we send a spotter?"

"No one's watching me squat in the woods," Reno said with a little extra bite. "Pretty sure they got who they wanted."

"Depends on who _they_ are," Aaron reminded him as he snapped open the canteen.

"Yeah well, let's hope they wanted Cloud, accidentally took Dan, and Maxwell got dragged into the forest by something that eats meat."

Aaron didn't respond as Reno headed off into the forest, keeping one ear on the conversation as the rest of the group gathered together to eat the nasty rations they'd been given, the other for any signs of life out here. Other than a handful of monsters, including a nasty flying one that proved to be almost agile enough to dodge bullets, the damn thing, they hadn't had any problems. Glancing back, Reno could just make out the color of one of the guys jackets—red, what kind of idiot where's _red_ in a forest?—before dropping his pants by a nearby tree.

He was just zipping himself up when the hair on his neck began to prickle. Reno kept his posture deliberately relaxed, straining to hear breathing, maybe a low growl, something to cue him in to what was stalking couldn't make out where it was, the forest was too dense and there were too many dark spots to hide in, but Reno was willing to bet money it was above him or directly behind him in his blind spot. That's where he'd be, if he were the predator.

Casually as possible, he belted his pants and was about to stick his hands in his pocket like he was just walking down the street when it struck.

Reno was barely able to turn before the handkerchief was over his mouth and nose and the other arm was around his neck to hold his head back. He held his breath, able to barely taste the chloroform, and brought his hands up to pry the person's fingers free. They were tough whoever they were, and a knee to the kidney was enough to cause Reno to involuntarily exhale, and when he inhaled reflexively he got a mouth and nose full of chemicals. He was out cold in seconds.

* * *

Vincent didn't ask what was inside the mako pods. A bare glance was enough to know that there was a lot of mako in there and something elsethat was distinctly humanoid. There was little doubt it had once been one.

The door at the top of the stairs was card and number coded. Cloud knew that most likely only Hojo had the required information. He had no qualms about blasting the door open if he had to. Cloud was reaching for his materia when Vincent stopped him. Without a word, the red-caped man glided forward, amazingly quiet on the metal floor despite the boots, and over to the keypad. With the tip of a blade hidden in his pants, he sliced four clean cuts around the little machine and pried it from the wall. It came away with a dozen wires. Vincent cut one and the door slid open soundlessly.

Cloud was too used to the ex-Turk's skills to be impressed but nodded in thanksas he headed into the next room. This one was also unfortunately very familiar. It had a long gangplank that crossed the room over a huge vat of pure mako. The glowing liquid simmered down below and threw the whole room into a sinister green glow. Cloud pointedly did not look down as he crossed the gangplank quickly to the room beyond where Jenova lay. He could barely hear Vincent's hollow footsteps behind him over the pounding of his heart.

Cloud deliberately blanked his mind before he walked into that room. He refused to acknowledge any thoughts, centering himself as he tried not to remember watching Sephiroth rip Jenova from the wall, calling her "Mother", visibly descending into madness as she pushed him over the brink. Cloud was going to cut that alien up into pieces and burn them, and he wouldn't be happy until they were scattered from Cid's airship across the far ocean.

As he stepped in he didn't hear any whispers. There was not a single echo of the terrifyingly seductive voice Cloud distinctly remembered. No oil-coated words to charm him. His body was finally clean of her influence; Cloud was able to draw a breath.

He didn't look up to where she was. He could sense, somewhere in the back of his mind, that he was probably mirroring Sephiroth's actions that fateful night, head cocked as he heard the voice—the one thankfully missing now—and then eyes slowly moving up the pipe to stand in front of the Calamity hidden by the name Jenova.

But when his eyes finally reached the metal case, there was no glowing beast inside.

Jenova was gone.

* * *

Reno was missing.

John stood up from the ground, brushing dirt off his knees. Reno's tracks were clear all the way to the smell of feces in the clearing, but after that nothing. It was like he'd been teleported from the spot. John wondered if maybe something flying had gotten him, but the tree cover was too thick for that. "You don't think Reno'd do it as a practical joke, would you?"

Aaron paused as he came through the trees towards him. "I don't think so. It shook him up that Cloud vanished like that. Plus, he'd knock some snow or leaves to the ground if climbed up, and I don't see anything."

"Yeah," John sighed. "I guess we keep moving then. Hopefully he'll make it in on his own."

Aaron didn't look too pleased, but there really weren't any other options. "This test is a lot harder than I thought it'd be."

"It wasn't this bad when I took it last time. The second test was literally an hour after the first. I thought for sure they weren't doing that again this time when they let us all go out. The stakes must be higher."

Aaron glanced back at the other guys who were gathered by the road talking quietly. "Chances are we're going to beat Cloud, Dan, and Reno to Rocket Town. We pass just for getting here, but…"

"We're gonna look pretty stupid for losing three members," John finished, shooting a sidelong glance at Aaron.

* * *

The metal canister that had once held most of her upper body was empty. There wasn't even liquid inside it. It was totally empty.

Cloud stared.

He felt numb. How could Jenova not be here? Hojo hadn't moved her to Midgar until _after_ Sephiroth's fall, and in fact he'd left her here deliberately so that he could organize the mission to Nibelheim and introduce Sephiroth and her. It would make no sense to spontaneously move her back to Midgar and then hide her away from the General.

A cold hand touched his shoulder very briefly then slipped away. "Jenova was moved recently." Vincent's rough voice was enough to draw Cloud's attention away from the empty tube and to more important matters: Jenova wasn't here. This wasn't ending today.

"Hojo must have taken her." Cloud knew it even before the words left his mouth. There wasn't a scratch on the building. The tube had been properly opened, cleaned, and locked. The only person in the world who would go through that procedure was Hojo. Cloud and Vincent were the only outsiders who'd been here, and no one else but high Shinra executives knew where Jenova was, if that, and no one but Hojo had any interest in her.

But _why_?

Vincent remained silent as he walked back to the doorway, silently waiting to see what Cloud would do.

There was no way Hojo could have gotten wind of Cloud's plans. He'd told _nobody_ , and no one knew he knew anything about the Calamity until he'd told Vincent. Reno was certainly not at that point, not even close. There couldn't have been surveillance in the Nibelheim mansion—Vincent would have known about it. No one was monitoring the building anyway, it hadn't been used since Sephiroth's relocation to Midgar as a young child.

Fueled by rage he hadn't felt in years, Cloud took up his sword—a poor replacement for his own—and sliced a clean line through the empty cell of metal and tempered glass.

* * *

A SOLDIER was waiting for them at the entrance to the town as the group straggled in. He asked for the identification numbers and then led them into town. They passed several empty fields, a pile of engine bits and small planes resting on a patch of land, and then into the town proper.

The giant rocket was huge. It was set a couple miles from the town and clearly visible even at night. The boys had been able to see it on occasion over the treetops as they descended from the mountains. Rocket Town itself was boisterous with a small-town vibe that made it seem quite comfortable, if remote. The SOLDIER led the cadets through the town square and into the main hotel without stopping and left them to be debriefed.

The whole hotel had been taken over by SOLDIER for the exams, so there were scattered maps, papers, and some personal stuff all around the lobby. Several soldiers were standing around on the far side by the fire, and it looked like the reception desk was now a monitoring center for the test.

A Third pointed them to a soft and some chairs in one corner of the room, and the teams relaxed into them, but John still felt nervous. He wasn't sure if they'd be penalized for losing three members, and he was worried about what had happened to them—especially Reno, because the redhead had no doubt been taken against his will. Reno wasn't stupid, and he wouldn't just follow after some movement or lights in the forest. John felt sure whatever had taken him had also taken Cloud.

A SOLDIER entered and walked over to them, introducing himself as a Third Class before sitting down across the table. He pulled out a notepad and pen, explainingquickly how the debriefing process worked.

Maxwell's team went first, and their story was fairly uneventful. Other than the run-in with the wolf, Maxwell's disappearance, and later Reno's, there was little else to be said. They'd spent most of the test looking for the path, and they'd found one small one that ended up too snow-covered to follow. It was by shear luck they'd made it to the same path John, Aaron, and Reno had been on.

Then it was the other team's turn. Aaron glanced at John for just a moment before he leaned forward to tell their part. "It wastwo nights ago when we decided to steal some rations off a team ahead of us. Cloud and Dan took one side of the road to be a distraction while John, Reno and I were on the other to make the steal. The three of us were waiting for Cloud's cue, but it never came."

There was no way the SOLDIER could miss the other team's disbelief as they heard this totally new story. John worked to keep a straight face, because Aaron was doing a damn good job selling it.

"See, we waited awhile, but still heard nothing, so we decided to regroup back at the starting point, but Dan and Cloud never showed up. We tried looking for them too, but we couldn't find anything. When we traced their steps all the way back to where the other team was camped out, we found out one of _their_ members was missing too."

The SOLDIER's was jotting down notes as the remaining members of Maxwell's team cried foul. "That's not what you told us!"

"So anyway, it was Reno's idea to ask what happened. They told us," he thumbed the other team, "that Maxwell was missing, and we figured Cloud and Dan were just dealing with him. They didn't come back though, so we thought they might have gotten turned around in the forest. Cloud's pretty good at navigating, but those trees all look the same." Aaron waved his hand around vaguely, and John nodded along. He and Aaron had worked out an outline for this story to make Cloud and Dan sound good to pay back Cloud for basically hauling their asses through the first exam.

"Megarian, you traveled with Tamboia the whole time. Can you pick up the story from there?" the Third asked, and John was about to answer when the Lieutenant General passed through the room with a steaming cup in his hand. He flopped down onto the nearest chair.

"Pretend I'm not here," he said, smiling over his cup.

John glanced over, feeling slightly intimidated as the friendly-looking man settled into his chair like he was about to listen to a story and not a debriefing. John coughed slightly, feeling a pit in his stomach as he lied through his teeth, "After we heard what happened to Maxwell, we, um, figured it'd be safer to work in a large group, so we… fixed the story." He knew he wasn't nearly as smooth,but hopefully he could pass it off as embarrassment for blatantly lying to the other guys. His eyes slid over to the First Class SOLDIER, but the man didn't seem to be paying them any attention at all. He was balancing his cup on two fingers like there was nothing better to do.

The SOLDIER debriefing them scribbled some more notes before looking back up at them calmly. "You are still missing a third team member you said. Cadet…" he pulled out several pieces of paper and flipped through them, "…Reno."

John paused awkwardly, floundering for what to say, when Aaron swooped in again, uncaring that the Third has specifically asked John to finish the story. "When we up at the top of the mountain, Reno found some tracks into the forest. Human tracks. He wanted to go after them, but I thought it would be better to just finish. So Reno went on his own, even though we tried to convince him otherwise."

John nodded along appropriately, and the SOLDIER's eyes just barely flicked over to the Lieutenant General, but the First Class SOLDIER didn't look like he was paying them any attention.

"I expect," John interjected, because Aaron had been doing all the talking so far and he should get one more thing in, "that Reno will come back in, maybe even with Cloud and Dan. They'll all make it though."

John's confidence wasn't paper-thin; he really thought they'd come back. To him at least, Cloud was more capable then most of his commanding officers, and Reno was nothing if not clever. Aaron was looking somewhat smug too, and thankfully the SOLDIER seemed like he might be buying it.

While John reflected on how many invisible points he should be getting for loyalty, Aaron hid a knowing smile from the Third. He rather liked flouting authority, and it was hard to do that in the military, so it was nice to spice it up.

The SOLDIER debriefing them folded down his legal pad, reshuffled the papers, and seemed mildly bothered by his superior's presence or lack of attention the whole time, probably worrying he was the one being judged, not the cadets. "We'll have your results back to you when we return to Midgar, but for now, congratulations on getting into SOLDIER. There are rooms available on the second floor for you."

That seemed to be the cue to celebrate, and while John and Aaron were getting some dirty looks for lying to their other teammates, confirmation of SOLDIER—and real confirmation this time—was too good to not be happy about. There was laughter and high five-ing, and John just wanted a hot bath and to sleep in real peace after three weeks of hell. Aaron, however, was apparently quite emboldened by his euphoria. He turned to the Lieutenant General with a bright smile and a hand out. "Aaron Tamboia."

"Zack Fair," the First Class SOLDIER and second in command of all the troops said, putting his cup back on the table and smiling back as they shook hands. "I heard Cloud went missing on your guy's watch?"

Maxwell's team had wide eyes as they heard Lieutenant General Fair refer to Cloud by first name. John had learned about Cloud's private training from Reno, so he wasn't surprised the Lieutenant General had sat in. Apparently Aaron knew as well since his face didn't reflect any surprise.

"Yeah, but I'm sure he's fine. He probably just had to take the long way down. That guy never takes the easy way out," Aaron said easily, waving away any concern.

"Why am I not surprised?" the First said with a somewhat rueful smile that hinted at an inside joke. "Well when he turns up I'll find out what happened. 'Til then, you guys should take advantage of those beds. Trust me, no Third's quarters beats a hotel."

"It was a real honor to meet you, sir." Aaron finished off smoothly, while the rest of the guys uncomfortably snapped salutes and repeated Aaron without any of his confidence.

John had just exited the room but paused when he heard Lieutenant General Fair speak up again. "Seems he vanished. I'm a little suspicious. Think the Turks did something?"

"No." It was the General's voice; John froze. He'd had no idea the General had heard them. "He's of no interest to them." The conversation continued in low tones John couldn't make out, and he didn't think twice before taking a conscious step back from the doorway. There was no way he wanted to be caught eavesdropping on the two highest ranked SOLDIERs in Shinra. He went up to the second floor, unable to stop thinking if Reno was right and how much more to Cloud there was.

* * *

Cloud could tell Vincent did not agree with his decision to destroy the reactor.

The blond knew it was risky: Shinra would notice, for one. The undue attention it would bring would also tell Hojo that he was lucky he'd taken Jenova when he did, and that'd make the paranoid scientist even more dangerous.

But Cloud couldn't find it in himself to care as he watched the pipes he'd shattered spew acid that ate away at the side of the building and dribbled mako all over the hungry earth. He couldn't bring himself to feel anything but fury.

This whole thing could have been over. He could have stopped worrying so much; it would have taken care of half the problem.

But no. Not for him.

Aeris had said he'd have to be a hero someway. Apparently it just had to be in a way that couldn't be easy. Cloud clenched and unclenched his fists; frustrated was too weak a word to describe his current mood. Furious, seething, raving, enraged, those were better.

"I know," he bit off suddenly, an answer to Vincent's continued presence that spoke volumes more than he would ever say. The man would never demand an explanation, but the blond felt some need to justify what he was doing. "This place-"

"-Is the same at the Shinra Mansion," Vincent said. And that was all that needed to be said.

He was still incensed with it all; still wanted to rip something apart, grind every last piece of the reactor into dust, and murder Hojo a dozen times over. He would hack every tentacle limb off that man into sushi-sized pieces before he'd ever be satisfied.

Unfortunately Cloud had to settle for his steaming blood cooling in the frosty Nibelheim air as he watched as the tubes of mako began to explode inside, the shrill pops of the shattering glass like fireworks. Part of the ceiling began to groan under the weight of the tubes he'd cut in his frenzy. It wasn't nearly as satisfying, but he still had time to make it to Rocket Town. Maybe he'd take the long way up and see if he couldn't entice a dragon into a fight.

"Thanks for, uh, taking out that, um…thing." Dan swallowed audibly.

"It was nothing."

He stumbled over something on the ground as he tried to make out who was leaning against the tree. Dan squinted into the dark of the forest, just barely able to make out the shape of the man. His eyes glowed strangely, but he was otherwise not altogether frightening in appearance. He wasn't overly tall, with narrow shoulders and a lean build, and all his actions so far were very graceful.

At first Dan had though those bright eyes was a monster, but when the stranger had flicked his wrist and split a beast creeping up on Dan in two with as much effort as Dan took to blink, the cadet was incredibly relieved to no longer be alone in this forest.

"My name is Dan," he offered after a moment of silence, trying to smile as nicely as he could.

The stranger smiled back as his eyes flickered from red to blue then back to red again.

"Genesis."


	27. Flouting the Rules

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cloud makes it to Rocket Town, but Reno's stuck in a bind, Dan isn't really making friends, and there's some visitors to Nibelheim.

Reno came to in almost complete darkness and silence. It was more than a little disconcerting after having lived in a bunker full of other guys for months where it was never really quiet and the safety lights outside always gave the bunker a little light. Since he didn't have that cotton-ball feel in his mouth, he didn't think it was the aftermath of a wild night, not to mention the bed was awfully hard.

He could barely remember how he'd gotten here. His head was throbbing painfully, and all his memories were rather fuzzy. Nibel forest. Lost Cloud. Maxwell's team? No, that couldn't be right…

After several shuffling attempts at getting up from the floor, and waiting for the blood to circulate through him, Reno was able to stand and take a look around. The room looked like a jail cell—and not a cheap one. It was built completely of cinder blocks, with one lone florescent light tube under security glass in the cement ceiling. There was a grate in one corner to piss in, and a solid steel door that was probably at least a foot thick. No windows, but that was expected. There also wasn't a chair.

Reno got up to examine the room even though there didn't look to be a crack anywhere. He started with the door. There was no handle, no keyhole, and there weren't even hinges, so it didn't look like he'd be able to get out that way without a blowtorch. The light might be useful, but it would be all too easy to install an electrocution feature into that. Better not tempt fate until he knew more about what was going on.

Reno wasn't desperate yet, but he wandered over to the grate anyhow. It was new and without any rust that could make it vulnerable, and there didn't appear to be any screws or nails he could wiggle out. The thing was welded shut. He nudged it with his foot anyways, but it didn't move.

Whoever had orchestrated this little happening had money, which meant jack shit really, especially if it was who he suspected. Even if he was wrong the Reno-napping all meant the same thing: Reno was screwed.

* * *

"Cloud."

The blond woke immediately. Cloud rarely remembered dreams that weren't nightmares, but tonight, under Nibelheim's heavy tree-cover, he had an especially horrible one.

It was his last fight with Sephiroth. Even now he could hear the grinding metal and shattering debris of the architectural skeleton of Shinra Headquarters falling all around Sephiroth and him, as energy sparked and warped within the space of their blades striking. But worse was the memory, undistorted even in his dreams, of thedeadness in Sephiroth's eyes. Cloud had watched those vicious green eyes turn hazy, and in their reflection watched as he killed his hero-turned-enemy once more.

He'd never forget the emotions that flashed through him when Kadaj-as-Sephiroth made that last declaration, even as he fell to earth—just a puppet, like all the others. But one that, as promised, just kept coming back.

"It is time," Vincent said.

The ex-Turk had already put the fire out and scattered the ashes. Breakfast was rations, and they ate as they walked.

It was a cold, crisp Nibelheim morning. The sky, barely visible through the thick tree-cover, was an unforgiving, solid blue. Their breath was visible in the morning air, and the weather would probably turn snowy within a day or two. Cloud and Vincent were both silent as they marched, a familiar situation to Cloud.

The two of them were moving in the general direction of Rocket Town. Cloud needed to report in, and Vincent needed to catch up after missing twenty-five years. It was almost unspoken that they would split up now and meet later in the city.

Even located deep inside the forest, as they were, the paths would probably still have cadets on them, so it was easier to move unnoticed in the denserwoods. Both moved quietly over dead leaves and pinecones, aware that even though together they could probably take anything in this part of the mountain, discretion was always better. Cloud's mind was only absently paying attention to where they were going. He could only think about what he would say to excuse his absencewhen he reached Rocket Town. What had his team said if they had gotten there already?

Vincent, on the other hand, mulled more on what Cloud had told him. It was certainly a lot to take in, and it would take time to absorb it all. The blond had told Vincent much about Sephiroth, and about the experiments Hojo was doing orwould do. Vincent's agenda was his own, but Cloud's intentions were aligned with his for now. The ex-Turk would reserve judgment on matters of trust, but a tentative arrangement was fine. Cloud was, despite appearances, deceptively strong, and if all was true, quite the resource.

* * *

Reno flopped back down on the freezing floor, feeling rather pissed off and yet, reluctantly impressed. They'd taken just about everything from him. His shoelaces, his belt, all the safety-pins on his standard-issue uniform, even his necklace, earring, and hair tie. He hated when his hair was loose.

At least he was left with his clothes; Reno could appreciate the altruistic side of whoever had dumped him here, because they sure didn't have for them, they hadn't done a strip search. Idiots. They either wanted him to get out, or they severely underestimated him—Reno was still torn on which.

He knew the drill: capture a prisoner and leave him to brood over it for a couple of hours, maybe even days. He doesn't know who's got him, why, or what they're planning for him, and he's left alive to be tortured by 'd keep it too cold to be comfortable, have the lighting go on and off at random to disorient, and if they were particularly devious they'd have some elevator music playing.

Reno just shook his head, because half the value of that psychological bullshit was playing into it. Reno pulled his shirt off, shivering slightly at the chill in the room, before tossing it into a corner. Wrapped around his stomach and chest were two rolls of toilet paper. They were so smoothly wrapped they felt like a little fat over muscle during a pat down, and as long as Reno didn't do any back flips they wouldn't rip. He'd perfected how to roll them around his torso ages ago in the streets, where a clean roll of toilet paper was worth almost as much as a gun.

But the best thing about toilet paper? It was incredibly useful and not just for shitting.

You could write notes with it, clog a toilet or air vent, and wipe up fingerprints. If you split each piece you got double the length, and a small ball of it didn't make a half-bad fire-starter.

People didn't think about that when they were going into the woods, but Reno had learned long how to read a situation, and walking out of the bunker to a couple of choppers meant all his survival instincts kicked in. He'd only had time to yammer some excuse about the bathroom before lift off before the Third Class could herd him over. Anything up his sleeve was better than nothing, even if it was just a damn roll of toilet paper.

Unfortunately, Reno didn't have any cellmates to trade notes with, no toilet, and no blood to clean up, but toilet paper was excellent relief from boredom, and he expected to be waiting at least ten hours.

* * *

Rocket Town was fairly unchanged since the last time Cloud had been there, though a big smaller since non-Shinra people hadn't moved in yet. The rocket failure had been just in the spring of this year, so Shinra was pulling all its space operations out now. Cloud didn't want to think about how the ex-scientists and mechanics were dealing with the presence of SOLDIER in their town. There was a lot of resentment because of all the jobs lost, especially as it was the canceled Shinra-project that was going to make the town prosperous.

Vincent had disappeared not long after the town came into view as silently as a wraith. At this point the blond refused to be impressed with the man's abilities.

Cloud made the rest of the way down the mountain by himself, taking his time as he did, until he reached the entrance where he was escorted by one of the SOLDIER Thirds stationed at the front gate to the hotel-turned-command-center. He was left in a small parlor room off the side of the main lobby. There were some regulation soldiers running around, along with several cadets sprawled out along chaises and chairs in the next room. One or two raised a hand in greeting when he peeked around the jam _._ He didn't see any of his teammates, but he would work with the assumption they'd come in first. If his story were vague enough, it wouldn't contradict whatever they might have said.

"Cloud Strife?" The blond turned and nodded at the SOLDIER here to debrief him. The guy looked tired and more than a little bored. He'd probably heard the same variation of the same story all day. If Cloud stuck to the same script he'd be forgotten within the hour. "Please narrate for me what occurred between the landing and your arrival in Rocket Town."

Cloud sat down on the couch and started to talk. The first half was about his team and establishing their path to Rocket Town. Then he had to explain how he became separated.

"On the second day, I thought I heard noises coming from the trees on one side of the road. I went to investigate and it took longer than I thought it would. When I tried to return to the path, my teammates were gone. I figured I'd come back ahead or behind them, but when I started walking in the direction we were supposed to go in, I ran into another team. Rather than get taken out, I went into the woods."

The SOLDIER was scribbling it all down so fast Cloud was sure he wasn't taking in anything more than the bare facts. He'd probably been debriefing cadets all day, and Cloud was glad he'd waited until just before dinnertime when the end of a shift was to come in.

"I ended up cutting through the woods to get here on my own. I only ran into a couple small monsters."

The SOLDIER didn't seem to realize he'd gotten the highly edited version of the story. When the blond stopped talking and the Third finished writing, he glanced up to make sure that was it. "That all?"

"Yes."

The SOLDIER signed off on the bottom of the notes and stood up. "You'll be able to find an empty bed upstairs on the second floor. Dinner will be in half an hour in the lobby here. You'll be confined to the hotel unless under the supervision of a SOLDIER."

Cloud saluted smartly and the guy waved him off and left. The blond sighed and decided to head upstairs and see if his team had made it in yet.

* * *

Reno didn't want to speculate too much, but Cloud's words were still ringing around in his head. If blondie had left those words with him before taking off…well, it certainly gave credence to his own situation. Reno glanced at his hand again, but he'd long since rubbed them off. Good thing too, perhaps.

Reno carefully set down another origami frog, his battalion of them set up in concentric circles with him at the center. Toilet paper, though thin and easily torn, was quite foldable, even if most of the frogs fell over eventually. He wished he knew more shapes, but he couldn't quite remember the crane.

But really, this was kind of a stupid test if that was true. It was so far just wasting his time and hopefully whoever was watching in security, and if he passed Reno wasn't even sure he could ever deal with the suits.

After a nap and some time wasted blowing bubbles and popping gum—fools didn't think to look inside the folds of clothes—Reno was starting to get bored. There were only so many frog armies he could make before it got old, and by his calculations someone should be coming for him soon.

But in the mean time… _How do you fold a fortuneteller again?_

* * *

Vincent had visited Rocket Town before, but it hadn't been called that then. It had been Shinra's Aerospace and Technological Facility, which was fancy parlance for "off-limits to civilians". Shinra's space ambitions had been in their infancy when Vincent had been a Turk, but it looked like they'd gotten very close to achieving space flight, only to stop a the last moment. Now, the famed rocket the town had been renamed for lay off to the side in an open field, abandoned.

It had been easy to slip in behind a restaurant. The SOLDIERs watching for returning cadets were on their last shift and only guarding the main gates. In town, Vincent maintained a low profile, staying off the main streets, skimming through a newspaper left in a garbage bin, and eavesdropping on a handful of conversations. Predictably it was all about Shinra's takeover of the local hotel for the SOLDIER Exam, old anger at the company, and the General's iconic presence.

The newspaper offered a little more insight into Shinra's activities. It was mostly politics, though Vincent did not recall the President having a son, nor did he remember the war they continued to reference. Shinra had been busy while he'd been asleep.

After much wandering about, including through a veritable museum of old planes in someone's backyard, Vincent was able to find a good angle of the hotel. Inside he could make out cadets flopped backwards on couches, feet propped in the air, and on the second floor someone asleep by the open window. The third floor was quiet, but the town bar just down the road was rowdy with off-duty SOLDIERs.

The ex-Turk lingered there, hoping to at least catch a glimpse of Sephiroth. Cloud had told him what had become of Lucrecia's child, but there was a difference in seeingwith his own eyes. It was two long hours of watching cadets talk and a handful of semi-responsible drunk SOLDIERs drift back in and pass out on their beds before the Great General finally appeared.

Accompanied by a fellow SOLDIER in the largest third-floor window, Sephiroth's brilliant silver hair stood out. He had strong features, though his face belied a life of solitude and war: stoic and cold, his shoulders stiff like he too had an XO around the corner; Hojo had made the perfect SOLDIER indeed.

Something inside Vincent, the insidious little voice he'd tried to appease before when he'd laid down in that coffin, told him he should have known this was coming. He'd seen the experiments, the testing Lucrecia had undergone for "science", and it was obvious that the child would be something exceptional—different.

It hurt, he could admit it, to see what he'd tried to stop right before his eyes: Lucrecia's illness, the child that would become an experiment rather than a human… Sephiroth, from the sounds of Cloud's testimony, was not Hojo's drone, which was the only thing he could be thankful for.

The guilt came back stronger than ever. _You did this to him. You failed to save either of them. Now she's dead, and he's as much a monster as you are._

He had seen enough.

* * *

Cloud walked up to the second floor of the hotel. It was quieter here, the faint voices of cadets in the lobby drifting up. He poked his head into two rooms, looking for his missing team, before someone stepped out into the hallway.

"Cloud!" The blond turned to see Aaron standing outside one of the rooms further down. "Come here! John's here too."

Cloud followed him in to see a sleeping John on one of the hotel beds. The room was a typical hotel room with two single beds, a small nightstand, and a desk in one corner. A magazine lay discarded on the floor, from Aaron most likely.

"Glad you made it," Aaron whispered, sitting down on the desk chair and indicating the bed for Cloud. "I already took a nap, but I wanted to see if there are any stragglers. We made it here in the early afternoon. Where were you? Where's Dan?"

Cloud paused to sit down, glancing over at John and then the door. "I went to Nibelheim. What about Dan?"

Aaron looked surprised at Cloud. "Didn't he go with you? That night you and him went missing. We figured he'd gone with you."

Cloud looked at Aaron hard for a couple of seconds. Dan might have tried to follow him, but Cloud was pretty sure he'd have heard him. If they thought they'd gone together though, they may not have searched as thoroughly. If Dan tried to follow and got lost… "No, he was asleep when I left."

"Shit," Aaron cursed, which was uncharacteristic of him. "We lost Reno too. Not a day after you'd left, he went to pee and never came back."

"Gone?" Cloud was rather alarmed at hearing this. Dan gone and then Reno made it seem as though they were being picked off. Was this Shinra's doing, or did whoever steal Jenova have something to do with this?But Dan?

"Did you find out what happened?" He demanded, turning back to Aaron.

"No. We ran into Maxwell's team, but he'd gone missing too. I checked with the other teams when we got here, but no one else has lost anyone like that. Just those three. SOLDIER wouldn't listen to me either."

Cloud exhaled, thinking hard. There shouldn't be anyone in the mountains except cadets and SOLDIERs. Turks were a possibility when it came to Reno, but it didn't account for Dan or Maxwell. Cloud didn't know much about Turk recruitment, but he was fairly sure those two weren't their style.

"What will we do? They fly us back to Midgar tomorrow morning, and I've heard they're only going to send one team out for the rest—and that's like, two-thirds of all the cadets who started. I hadn't realized how easy we had it until we got here and were the third group to come in—and the biggest. Dan won't last out in those woods. Especially off the trail."

Aaron's worry was obvious, but they didn't have many options. If Dan had drifted the way Cloud had gone he might hit Nibelheim if he was lucky, or at least a path around there. If not… there was a good chance he wouldn't leave. The Nibel Mountains were unforgiving, especially in winter, Cloud knew.

"If they don't show tomorrow there's nothing we can do."

* * *

The locks began to turn in the door, and Reno, who had been lounging, making his frogs fight each other out of boredom, sat up. The metal door was pushed open and a blue-suited man stood on the other side. He didn't look familiar, with a coiffed, dark hairstyle Reno would surely have remembered, but the redhead knew immediately who he was—or rather, whom he represented.

The man seemed to only react by blinking very hard at the legion of origami frogs, trying to hide his shock as best as possible.

Reno stretched as he stood, doing his best to unnerve the guy. "Ready?" he asked him with a smirk.

He'd like to say he let them put the handcuffs on before he was dragged to an interrogation room that looked exactly the same as the one from the drug-testing incident he'd been sent to. The walls were plain, no windows of course, and a steel-framed door. The only furniture was the table, nailed to a plain tile floor, and an old phone on it, along with a pad and pencil for notes.

Doing his best to unsettle the guards too, Reno happily sat himself and even slouched in the chair, being extra friendly as the Turk handcuffed him to the table. "So, are you going to at least leave me donuts this time? It's just common courtesy, man," Reno drawled. The Turk ignored him though, but Reno didn't mind. "You know, you look pretty sharp in that blue suit. They come custom?"

It earned him the tiniest of scowls, but no other visible reaction.

Firmly attached to the table, the Turk left and Reno sat in the over-air-conditioned room, humming to himself. Honestly, he was a little worried about what this was about, but he couldn't let them know that. If the Turks were involved, then the big guns would be coming soon.

And they did.

Literally.

"Tseng!" Reno called, smiling sarcastically at him because he couldn't punch the man in the face. This was his chance to get back at Tseng for that-

The phone was picked up from the table and slammed into his head, causing Reno to shout and almost fall to the floor. The handcuffs caught him though, chafing his wrists as he struggled to right himself. "What the hell?! Don't I at least get a safe-word?"

Tseng sneered at him. "Now that _that's_ in order, tell me Reno, how badly do you want to be in SOLDIER?"

"What?" He tried to automatically touch the bruise already forming on his forehead, but his hands were caught by the cuffs.

"I don't repeat myself," Tseng said patiently.

"Well, it's way better than getting stuck kissing your ass all day," he managed to get out, if barely. Another swing of the telephone clocked Reno on the back of the head, and _Planet_ , Tseng was a sadist.

With a pained groan, "You know I think we're bordering on abuse here, baby."

Tseng's smirk almost made Reno want to squirm. "I heard you managed to slip in gum _and_ toilet paper into our rooms."

"I'm a ninja," Reno rolled his eyes, trying to keep his cool. He liked the Turk test even less than SOLDIER test, because at least when SOLDIER hit you they let you hit back. "Come on Tseng, enough twisted foreplay already."

Any hope of putting the Turk off balance was dashed when Tseng said, "I hope you know your buddies in Feuer Frei who make Donkey Punch are enjoying the mines."

"What the hell is Donkey Punch?" he asked around the pounding ache in his head. If Tseng gave him a concussion he was definitely going to do more than punch him the next chance he got.

"Moonshine Reno, from those gang buddies of yours."

Reno groaned. You work with one gang and they think you work with them all. What about "exclusive" and "we'll shoot you if you double-cross us" does no one get anymore?

"Don't I get a phone call or something?" Reno asked, deliberately ignoring whatever tree Tseng was barking up in favor of groaning as he rolled his head back to loll on the chair back. Reno couldn't see Tseng's face, but he sure knew what it'd look like, freaking smirking sadist.

"You may be able to dig yourself out of this if you play your cards right, Reno."

"What is this, the dog squad? I know you do 'recruitment' for SOLDIER," _my ass,_ Reno thought, "but what? I can't get in 'cause I lived under the plate and ran with a gang? You know that everyone is. Know more if you took that stick out of your ass an-"

"Reno, Reno, Reno." Tseng's fingers ghosted over Reno's shoulder, skimmed through his loose hair, and yanked a fist full at the back of his head. Reno yelped.

"I know you've figured out what this is already. I wouldn't have chosen you if you couldn't. Right now, your survival rate's hovering under 30%—but if you play my game, you'll be a Turk. _My_ subordinate."

* * *

Genesis frowned, staring at smoldering wreckage that _definitely_ shouldn't have been there. Mako and other chemicals were dribbling out of pipelines, sparks were still coming off freshly cut wires, and it was still smoking. The whole thing couldn't have been more than a few hours old.

He flipped through _Loveless_ , searching for the right passage. Jenova was a necessary component of Dr. Hollander's plan if he ever wanted to save him or Angeal. This should have been relatively simple. Go to the Nibel reactor and retrieve it. It would be right under that bastard Hojo's noise, and no one would be the wiser for at least several months before the next inspection.

"Wow…"

Genesis didn't even glance over. This… pet he'd saved had followed him all the way here. It hadn't been worth getting annoyed at, but now it was an unwelcome addition to this problem.

"What happened?"

Genesis didn't bother to answer that, instead reflecting on a passage, _"_ _Even if the morrow is barren of promises, nothing shall forestall my return."_

It wasn't what he was looking for, in fact, what he really needed was for someone to inform him _why_ the reactor was gone. It was here when Hollander last checked Shinra's database. It wasn't right that it would be _gone_ —conveniently just _hours_ before he got here. The little town hadn't even gotten up here yet, and the damn thing was still _warm_.

"Huh? Um… what was it?"

Genesis whipped around to face the little cadet, annoyed now that he was unable to find the right passage in _Loveless_ and something was asking stupid questions.

"That _was_ my mission. Now why are you here?"

Not really expecting a good answer, the ex-SOLDIER turned away, only to turn back at the mumbled reply.

"Um, SOLDIER Exam?" The cadet looked unsure, but more eager now at Genesis' look. "Yeah, it's the SOLDIER Exam. We have to get to Rocket Town by… tomorrow. Wait! Are you going there too?"

"No," Genesis said shortly. "Who's here for the exam?"

"Well, cadets of course. Oh! And some returning soldiers too."

Genesis narrowed his eyes, his acute hearing almost catching the "eep" of the cadet.

" _Which_ SOLDIERs?"

"Uh, oh, well, the General is here. He flew out with us. The Lieutenant-General too, and a bunch of Seconds and probably Thirds."

"Sephiroth is here?"

"Uh…I think so, yeah."

Genesis turned away from the babbling cadet to look back at the remains of the reactor. "Jenova was supposed to be here…"

Standing up, the ex-SOLDIER made one circuit around the ruins, determining that if that creature were here it was gone now, before turning back to the cadet who was still hanging around. "What?" He asked, irritated.

"Well… are you at least heading towards Rocket Town?"

Genesis rolled his eyes this time, breaking the esteemed expression his face usually settled in, and didn't answer. Before the human could even react, he took off at a sprint, weaving through trees back up the mountain, easily losing the cadet. He had to at least get a glimpse of Sephiroth. See what he was up to now that he and Angeal were gone.

" _Infinite in mystery is the gift of the goddess / We seek it thus, and take to the sky / Ripples form on the water's surface / The wandering soul knows no rest."_

* * *

Careful to move quietly through the caves, the middle-aged woman worked her way through windy corridors of natural rock, toxic wet spots of molten mako, and brilliant beams of sunlight shooting through a pock-holed roof.

The materia caves of the Nibel Mountains were not well known, even by many people of Nibelheim. The monsters that prowled between the town and the caves were often terrifying enough to frighten away most people, and only the guides ever wandered this way.

Elanor Strife was a different kind of woman. Life in the mountains with a rebellious streak wide as those mountains had taught her not to be afraid. Certainly after her lonely exile from the town's community she'd learned to be stronger still. There were very few experiences as hardening than being abandoned by the father of one's child, and then having to raise the little boy by one's in a town that didn't take kindly to strangers or single mothers. By picking her way quietly up the mountain and being extra careful if fresh tracks were about, she had managed to make this trip safely time and again.

Jewelry that used mako was rare, exquisite, and fetched a high price in the local markets. When she had the chance, Elanor made beaded jewelry from bits of hard, untainted mako found in the caves. She had taken a young Cloud here, his little plump hand in her own, when the beasts had pulled back in the early winter. She had tried to instill in her son a sense of awareness of the world, even their small corner of it. It was how, after years of hard work, she managed to send her only son all the way to Midgar for a better life.

Rounding the next corner, she could just make out the mako fountain. A true thing of beauty, it never failed to humble her, no matter how many times she came. Pure, untouched mako burbled up from it, causing mako crystals to develop to even the size of her hand. Elanor had never dared to touch it—mako poisoning was, after all, not unheard of in a reactor town—but instead moved about the edges of the pool it formed, carefully picking up the solid drops that had fallen to the side.

As she picked up the new crystallized pieces around the fountain, a soft echo bounced to her from one of the side passages. The cave was riddled with naturally forming paths, so at first she dismissed the noise. Small monsters creeped through these caves, and so long as she didn't bother them they didn't bother her.

The sound repeated though, forming slowly a steady pattern of footsteps that echoed off the walls to make it seem like a small crowd was walking around. Surprised more than afraid, Elanor Strife turned around to see human shadows on one of the walls, slowly looming larger. Had someone from the town come up here? A lost guide? Daring hunters?

As they rounded the bend, Elanor was surprised to see three people she didn't recognize and who did not seem like anyone she had ever met before. It was odd to see such a disparate group; one was only a boy, perhaps a little past than her son's age, while the other two were clearly older. The tallest looked like a formidable man, with broad shoulders and thick arms, but the one standing in the most relaxed manner…well, she wasn't sure at first glance if they were a man or a woman. All of them wore no winter clothing at all, though they were armed.

Elanor Strife had encountered a lot of things she didn't understand in her lifetime, and she tried her best to take these things in stride. She smiled tentatively.

She felt a tinge of nervousness as she made eye contact with the youngest one, but determinedly ignored the feeling, instead drawing on all her stubbornness and strength honed from years of hardship.

Strangely, all had silver hair, and as they approached it glittered and reflected the blue-green light of the mako fountain. She was reminded of her son's childhood hero, and all those clippings of the silver-haired general.

Stranger still, the youngest one walked closer to her, hand outstretched. From the look of him he was a late teen, but his eyes and manner seemed so much younger.

"Mother?"


	28. Will You Commit to This Program

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reno is stuck in his own version of the Hunger Games, and some of the truth is forced out of Cloud.

_I knew you when you were a Turk._

A blue-suited Turk thrust a gun into Reno's hand, and the door was slammed shut behind him. The man was unknown to Reno, but he was beginning to suspect what was going to happen. In fact, he was beginning to suspect a lot about what was going to happen.

Reno knew Shinra had some weird things going on, but an entire underground training facility? The damn thing was like a labyrinth. Reno had been wandering around in the dimly lit metal interior for nearly two hours, and he hadn't gotten anywhere. Although, he was pretty sure he was back in Midgar. The city's smell seeped into everything.

The only direction he'd gotten was, according to Tseng, he'd "know what to do".

Asshole.

_I knew you when you were a Turk._

The maze was dark, riddled with dead ends, pitch-black tunnels, monsters like the ones in the slums, and a confusing array of other Turks, who would happily shoot him. He'd had more near misses than he could count, especially when there was no cover and he had tosprint for it. So far Reno had only found a box of ammunition but no food or water.

Was he supposed to kill the Turks shooting him? Most of them were up high in alcoves, and he hadn't been able to do more than duck around a corner and fire blindly. The low lighting, not to mention that there were loads of boxes, cubbyholes, and hidden balconies for the would-be snipers to hide behind, made it near impossible to get a good shot. No wonder the goddamn survival rate was 30%. They were _actively_ trying to kill him.

Reno dodged behind a wooden crate just in time as the bullet skimmed by him. The reportof the gun was deafening in this metal maze, echoing over an invisible ceiling and making his ears ring every time he fired. He'd given up shooting back, letting the Turks think he'd run off in the other direction or something.

_I knew you when you were a Turk. I knew you when you were a Turk._

_What the fuck, Cloud?!_ _Slip me a stupid note before you disappear and you tell me_ that?

The words continued to repeat themselves even as Reno moved through the maze, only half a mind on how to get out. The other half focused solely on Cloud. Turk? Reno had never been a fucking Turk. Nothing seemed to make sense with Cloud recently, but this one topped the cake. What kind of cryptic message was that?

It was another three hours of this mess, including a nasty encounter with some fiend that looked like a cross between a crab and a lion, before Reno finally seemed to be getting somewhere in the maze. Cloud's words were still a really annoying mystery, but one that was set aside for his immediate survival. You always knew you were deep in enemy territory when either the gunfire turned up a notch—or when it completely stopped. But at least it gave him some information about what was going to happen next.

The dark hallway he was carefully walking through opened up to a larger room. Reno couldn't make out detail as he crouched to the ground, but he could sense the space in the air. Roughly ten minutes ago he seemed to have passed the barrier of their "guard", the people that were firing on him. Now he just needed to figure out Tseng's non-instructions.

Keeping low to the ground, Reno carefully peeked out from the hallway then risked sticking a booted foot out. It had more protection than a bare hand—barely—and if he kept it low he might not attract unwanted attention. If there were someone or something there, they would leap for that first.

When nothing grabbed or shot at him, Reno tentatively stepped out. His footsteps reverberated in the still air as he made his way through the large expense, only vaguely sensing the opening where another hallway began. It was mad creepy wandering around in the dark like this. Reno seriously hoped he was getting to the end of it.

After a couple more turns, Reno started to notice the change in atmosphere. The metal ground became a carpet, there were doorknobs at even intervals, and after jumping up, was able to touch the ceiling, complete with electric lights, though none were on. It felt like…an office.

The doors were all locked and it was too much risk to break one open lest someone hear, so Reno stalked down the black hallway with little idea of where he was. He couldn't see more than three feet ahead of him, and he hadn't the faintest idea exactly what he was supposed to be doing other than surviving. Was there a goal? Was he supposed to do something? It felt like somewhere between a video game and horror flick.

As Reno walked though, he began to hear the sound of steady breathing. It echoed faintly in the quiet, and his every sense heightened almost painfully. Reno slowed his steps and evened his breaths, moving carefully but steadily closer to the sound.

It was through that door, the one Reno could now see, barely two feet from it, that was slightly open. He could almost feel someone in there, breathing quietly, probably muffled behind their hand from the sounds of it. Another recruit? Were they supposed to duke it out? That would be totally cliché Reno couldn't help thinking. Either way he was _not_ dying in some barbaric test of Tseng's creation.

Holding the gun in both hands, arms taunt and body ready, he jumped out and aimed, finger just a hair over the trigger, but didn't fire.

There wasn't any movement, just a hitched breath, and Reno could see now that there was a low light here, illuminating a person tied to a chair with duck tape. He was wearing a standard Shinra soldier uniform, and it was impossible to tell his identity because of the black bag tied over his head.

Reno had been through a lot of shit today (or was it two days? He didn't really know how much time had passed since he'd been kidnapped.), and he really didn't want to deal with a hostage. Free him? Drag his sorry ass to safety without getting both of them killed?

He didn't have to think long before Tseng stepped out of the shadows, flicking the light on more. Reno almost shot him there, but held his ground, squinting in the bright light as Tseng moved behind the hostage tied to the chair.

"So you made it." Tseng's lip curled a little, but Reno wasn't sure if he was displeased or something else. "Kill him."

Reno thought for a split-second that Tseng was telling someone else to kill _him_ , but when nothing happened, Reno realized then what this test was all about: he had to kill the guy in the chair.

The muffled voice behind the bag wasn't understandable, but it was pretty clear the guy was alive and terrified. Reno felt slightly green at the thought of the squirming man who could hear every word.

"Reno, kill him." Tseng was standing _right there_ looking almost nonchalant about the whole thing. Something about the tension in Tseng's face though told Reno he maybe wasn't as onboard with this as he looked.

_I knew you when you were a Turk._

Reno needed to stall. He needed to feel the situation out first.

"What's he done?"

Tseng shrugged. "Does it matter?"

Reno watched Tseng as he spoke, careful to analyze his expression. This could be a backwards test, but if this were to become a Turk…

_I knew you when you were a Turk._

"Your order is to kill him."

Reno paused to consider the guy strapped to the chair. He didn't look that old from body structure alone. A soldier then? Reno had only killed in the heat of the moment, so standing there preparing himself for it felt wrong. A shoot out in the slums wasn't really meant to kill someone; it was just to scare the others off. The only real time he'd ever truly killed another human being was when he'd fired at one guy who just kept coming, and even then the adrenaline from the gun pointed straight at him had been a big part of it.

This was…different.

Reno raised the gun though, aiming down the barrel for the man's head. The only mercy of a soldier was a fast death.

_I knew you when you were a Turk... Knew_? As in _known_ , been friends with? Not just known he was one, but _knew knew_?

"Hey, Tseng… when you knew something, it already happened, right?"

He pulled the trigger before he could try and be moral.

If there was one thing Reno was thankful for, gunshots are a pretty clean way to kill. Other than the spasm of impact, and the head dropping forward, there wasn't much evidence. The dark uniform and bag hid any bloodstain. Reno was quite thankful then he didn't have to see the man's face.

Tseng's clapping echoed mockingly as Reno pointed the gun at the Turk.

"Reno," Tseng said, looking awfully relaxed for a man with a gun dead-set on him, "Welcome to the Turks."

_I knew you when you were a Turk._

Tseng said something more, but Reno wasn't really listening. Cloud had _known_. The blond had known Reno was being eyed by the Turks, he'd known that Reno would pass their stupid test and become one. It was like he could see the future…or something. God that sounded stupid when he thought it but—

Reno didn't finish the thought. Tseng had whipped off the black bag on the man's head, revealing the face.

Maxwell.

He'd shot and killed Maxwell. A fellow cadet. A bastard of one, but still a peer.

Had Cloud known that? If he'd known Reno as a Turk…

* * *

The return trip to Midgar was one giant party.

It had taken seven helicopters to fly everyone out to Nibelheim, but in the end it took only two helicopters to fly them back. Eight cadets had passed to join SOLDIER. Those that didn't make it back to Rocket Town in time would be rounded up and returned to join the regulation army.

Despite Dan and Reno's missing status, Cloud was still able to join in the good feelings of those eight that made it. His dream of SOLDIER had finally come true,but it was bittersweet that it had taken until now for him to do it. He would be a SOLDIER.

When they landed in Midgar, there were more shouts, calls for another wild night at a bar, and all manner of celebration. These lucky eight were moving up in the world, and even Cloud was drawn in once again, his smile bright.

The cadets—now SOLDIER Thirds technically—were dismissed. Before Cloud could move off with the others, Zack's arm landed on his shoulder, squeezing again.

"Proud of you Spike."

Cloud closed his eyes, memorizing the words again. Zack had been saying that since yesterday, when he'd come bursting into Cloud's room shouting congratulations and beer and steak. Zack treated him to dinner, drilling him about the second half of the exam the whole way, and recounting his own promotion to SOLDIER afterwards. Though Cloud was forced to severely edit his recount of the exam, he was more than happy to hear about Zack's promotion properly this time.

Before—in truly another lifetime—Cloud had heard second hand about Zack's advancement to SOLDIER. It had been during the war Aeris explained, when just about everyone became a SOLDIER because they needed the men. He'd jumped from Third to First is two months, Zack had filled in, and Cloud just sat back and let his friend talk, gesturing the whole while. If Cloud could, he'd never have it any other way: a full stomach, troubles forgotten for the moment, friendship, and laughs. This was why, he told himself as he just let Zack's voice wash over him, that he did this in the first place.

When they'd finally returned to the hotel after dinner, it was to a mystifyingly distracted Sephiroth. Zack didn't seem to react immediately to it though, perhaps still caught up in Cloud's promotion high. "What's up Seph?"

Cloud fought not to fidget when Sephiroth glanced briefly over at him, but he got the impression he wasn't involved. This offered little relief though, because something was clearly bothering the General.

"I wished to congratulate you, Strife, on your performance. You will be a welcome addition to SOLDIER."

Sephiroth's tone was formal, and Cloud responded in kind with a stiff bow and murmured thanks. Zack shot the General a look, seeming to catch on now, but otherwise didn't say anything.

There was an awkward lull that Zack immediately strove to fill. "I'm pretty sure I saw some guy with pudding earlier on. You want some Seph? Cloud?"

Cloud shook his head, murmuring something about a full stomach. Sephiroth didn't offer anything more than a "no thank you", before leaving for his room. Zack looked mildly worried, but didn't ask Cloud for any help with Sephiroth's enigma.

Zack ruffled his hair one more time and said with a slightly wider smile than he might have otherwise sported, "Catch you bright and early tomorrow, huh?"

Now, Zack laughed good-naturedly had told him to pack up, patting him on the back and stirring from his reminiscences on Sephiroth's off behavior. "You're going to get the dress uniform when you get to your new rooms—four guys in one bunk! Ceremony's tomorrow, bright and early. Then we'll see about an apprenticeship, huh?"

Cloud could feel something short-circuit in his brain. "R- Really?"

"What? You weren't expecting that?" Zack really laughed then, "Everyone in SOLDIER's been asking me why it's taking so long. Now that you're a Third I'll start training you for real."

Zack punched Cloud's shoulder lightly then, and waved as he began to walk off to join the General. Cloud's eyes followed him as he did, and he really smiled for what felt like the first time in years as he jogged back to the cadet barracks.

* * *

The ceremony was like all the ones before it, except that Zack was beaming like a proud father and bragging about Strife every chance he could get. This was expected behavior for the Lieutenant General, but this time it was genuinely annoying him.

The General stood stiffly at the head of the room, while Heidegger rambled on about pride and glory, swelling at times like a pimple about to burst. Sephiroth was in no mood to be doing this formality. All he wanted to do was disappear for a while and think.

Cloud Strife's enigma had bothered him as much as ever during the exam, because hee simply had no answers, and now knew he had no way to extract them without due cause for alarm. While waiting for the blond to finish the final part of the exam, Sephiroth decided it was time to do a little more serious digging. He was never one for hacking, but Sephiroth liked to be well rounded, and he knew a thing or two about computers. Borrowing Zack's computerfor both the clearance and the lack of spying eyes—it had been a long-standing aggravation that he had to borrow one of his First's computers if he wanted any privacy—Sephiroth quickly accessed Shinra's main database.

He should have done this earlier, he thought, as he skimmed public records. Zack was off chatting with the other SOLDIERs, so Sephiroth had some time in his makeshift office unbothered. No doubt Zack would want to help, knew the other man was just as bothered by the questions,but Sephiroth wanted to do this alone. He knew, logically, that he shouldn't be making this personal, but it was growing more difficult with every run-in with Strife.

The files on record matched those in Shinra's database from when Cloud joined, so the blond hadn't lied in that respect. He'd also never won any sort of competition—in fighting or otherwise—so finding out if he had personal training would be difficult. Especially considering in a small town like Nibelheim arranging that sort of thing would be informal.

Digging deeper, Sephiroth considered other possibilities. He had entertained the thought that Cloud might be associated with a group like AVALANCHE. If that were the case, other departments in Shinra might have a file that may have clues. There was also, regrettably, Hojo. The man was, among other things, very organized, and he often kept private files on anything that caught his attention. Cloud might very well be one of those things, though the thought was off-putting.

He could only access limited parts of the Turk database from outside Shinra HQ without stirring up their interest, but there was nothing about blond associates of AVALANCHE or any of the myriad of gangs and political groups they kept an eye on. Other searches across varying department pulled up the same blanks, and eventually Sephiroth turned towards the Science Department. What Sephiroth had found in Hojo's hidden files last night had been disturbing and highly upsetting. Until Sephiroth could find a way to confront Hojo about it, or at least covertly deal with his own feelings on the…abomination Hojo had spawned.

Heidegger, with his famous 'horse laugh' as it was known, finally finished whatever tedious speech he'd been making and left through a side door. Sephiroth said his rehearsed bit, hardly hearing himself despite the eight new Thirds hanging on his every word, and left quickly. He sensed Zack's concerned look, but ignored it.

He needed to find better coping mechanisms than killing things, but that would do for now.

* * *

The first two days of being a Third were mostly orientation. SOLDIER's do this, your canteen is here, training gym over there, make Shinra proud, blah blah blah. Yet, despite the dullness of those days, all the other boys were seeing the world in a new light, through the lens of power and prestige. Cloud was just as happy about SOLDIER as the rest, but he couldn't see the world like that—mostly because he'd been on that side of the lens before. Now that the great looming hurdle of SOLDIER was jumped, it seemed to throw the rest of what Cloud had to do in relief. Reno's still unexplained disappearance was becoming disturbing, but he held out hope it was the Turks. Not to mention that Cloud had yet to see Dan, which begged the question of what happened to him.

Most worrying of all though was Jenova's mysterious departure. There were just too many things going on to be light-hearted for long, and in his experience, things would in fact, get worse.

It was the third day of SOLDIER when Zack kicked open Cloud's door at 0800. The blond was not at all expecting Zack's visit, and so was barely dressed in time to be dragged out the door. His three bunkmates were no more thrilled than the blond was.

Zack wasn't talking, just grinning stupidly as he wolfed down his breakfast with Cloud, before hauling him off again.

"Zack, where are we going?"

"Aw Cloud, you've asked like fifty times. You'll see in a sec." Zack was far too excited for Cloud's liking, and it was making him nervous.

Cloud was pretty sure it was the third time, but let it past. Still pleased with the easy peace between them, it was strange now that after years of fantasizing about these small interactions with the man he was able to have them.

They arrived in front of a building on a part of the compound Cloud had not been to yet. "Um…"

"It's the First Class' gym!" Zack swiped his card and pushed the doors open, walking Cloud past an impressive pool, weight training room, and finally to a large gymnasium built especially for sword fighting.

"Zack!" Cloud hissed, suddenly uncomfortable as a First passed by, giving Cloud a curious look before grinning at Zack. "I don't think I'm supposed to be here."

"Puh-leez," Zack laughed off, waving away Cloud's concerns. "I reserved the _whole_ gym just for this."

Cloud was about to say something, but the words died in his throat as Zack swung the door open. Sephiroth, in full battle uniform, was standing in the center of the room with Zack's buster sword in one hand, and what looked like an older one in the other.

"Ready to take a swing?"

If someone had thrown Cloud off the roof of Shinra HQ, he probably wouldn't have noticed.

Zack didn't seem to notice Cloud's stunned expression, or if he did he misinterpreted it. "I know you've been hankering for a go, so Seph and I dug up this old buster sword. She's a fine piece of work despite her age; I think you'll like her."

While Zack was talking, Cloud could sense Sephiroth's curious skin felt itchy, and his hands began to sweat. He was undoubtedly here to watch and see how Cloud was doing. The blond was pretty sure this was the precursor to the inevitable interrogation. Even still, Cloud couldn't control his ingrained reaction to the man when he was dressed in battle gear.

"Sure," Cloud murmured, only half-hearing Zack as he took the proffered blade from Sephiroth, not realizing how he'd continue to keep a steady eye on Sephiroth's sword hand.

It was an old buster sword that had seen better days, but the blade had been sharpened and the handle rewrapped. As Cloud hefted it up, he could feel the mean weight of the weapon, and it felt right somehow. Regular swords were always, somehow, a little inadequate compared to the brute strength of a buster sword.

It was hard to compare his old buster swords to this one. If it weighed less, he couldn't tell given the alterations in his physique. Not to mention that it had been, what, almost half a year since he'd held one? Had it really been that long?

Sephiroth assessed as Cloud examine the weapon, but he could already see what Zack and he had talked about. Cloud _knew_ weapons. He had experience as a warrior, and seemed familiar with the buster sword, which was suspicious because heavy weapons like a buster sword were rare. He looked over to Zack, noting his friend's expression.

For Zack, it was undeniable now, and a small lump formed in his throat of what he and Seph were doing to Cloud. It had to be done, but it was unfortunate they couldn't be more straightforward about it.

Lifting up _Galatine_ to rest on his shoulders, Zack offered Cloud a cocky grin as he indicated the sword in Cloud's hand. "Warm up a bit first, and then swing her around a bit. Get a feel for it. Then I want to see what you can do."

Cloud looked distracted by the sword, and so Zack was able to sneak a look at Sephiroth, who was standing off to the side. The General's eyes were on Cloud, watching his every movement. They slid over to Zack's though, confirming what he thought. This was probably the best way to do it. Cloud was an exceptionally hard nut to crack, and they agreed that it had gotten to the point that they needed to prove they knew something was up. Plus, there was no way Cloud could hide his training from both Zack's andSephiroth's sharp eyes.

After Cloud had gotten the chance to swing the buster sword a bit, Zack called for a slow start. At first they followed the basic kata, letting Cloud get a feel for how the blades connected, the speed he could swing it, how he had to adjust his movements to compensate for the different shape and size of the weapon. Zack could see the way Cloud's arms trembled sometimes, whether from exertion of the movement or just sheer weight he wasn't sure. Sometimes he forgot that hefting around a fifty-pound sword was beyond some people's limits.

Cloud, on his part, was doing his best to _not_ do his best. It felt good to swing a buster sword again—too good. Sephiroth's scrutiny was like a burn on the back of his neck, not to mention that Zack's eyes were following his every breath, step, and swing. It was unnerving and making him more than a little uncomfortable.

"Okay, faster now Cloud."

They began to speed up, and Cloud's shoulders began to ache a little at having to hold such a heavy blade. He had none of the training he'd had before, when it had been no problem to wield the completed Tsurugi in one hand.

Now though, it was tough. Not to mention that Zack was slowly weaving in more complicated movements. Some of the attacks were more difficult to deflect, and Cloud was often sidestepping and trying to avoid them rather than parry.

They sped up more, and Cloud's biceps began to really shake. He didn't have anywhere near the endurance he'd had before. It was also harder to fight when two sets of eyes were watching every move and every twitch he made.

"Okay, enough."

Relieved, more because the exercise was over than the chance to put the blade down, Cloud lowered the sword to the ground and rolled his shoulders.

Sephiroth, taking note of Cloud's distraction, flicked his eyes at Zack and nodded at theregular broadsword he'd discreetly set aside. This was the real test. Cloud's real strength would not be concealed if he were overwhelmed, and most especially if he didn't have time to think.

The other SOLDIER put down his own buster sword and took up the other sword, throwing one last, somewhat reluctant look at Cloud. Zack was never one for more manipulative means, but the First hadn't needed too much convincingto prove that a direct approach wouldn't work. "Here Cloud!" Zack called.

Cloud looked up from where he'd been watching the rotation of his arm, only just fumbling to catch the blade tossed to him in time and forcing him to turn and grab the handle or risk skewering himself. Dropping the buster sword and about to yell at Zack about things like basic sword safety, he was abruptly cut off by a silver blur that Cloud instinctively jumped away from. He didn't have much of a chance to catch his breath though before Sephiroth was on him, the totally unexpected fight catching Cloud completely off guard.

It was like a nightmare. What was going on? Where had this come from? Had they planned this? Zack wouldn't do this to him. Sephiroth?

There wasn't time to think though.

Sephiroth was a fast opponent, especially while wielding a ridiculously long sword, and Cloud had to be on his toes if he didn't want to get seriously injured. He had no doubt, considering the force behind the blows that the General wasn't holding back nearly as much as he probably should have on an unenhanced.

It was beautiful and terrible to see Sephiroth this way. Sephiroth and Masamune was a legendary pair for a reason. Not only did Sephiroth know exactly how to manipulate the blade best at its full reach, but he was also excellent in close-quarters combat. He could make that blade sing.

Cloud's tired shoulders and arms were completely forgotten in the wave of a quick series of slashes followed by a thrust that almost eviscerated him. If it weren't for a nifty wrist twist he'd learned from hundreds of these battles with a very different Sephiroth, he might have only one kidney.

The blond didn't register Zack's low whistle as Sephiroth drove him backwards, the regular broadsword he'd been tossed barely adequate for defending himself.

Sephiroth continued with the motion as Cloud blocked his blade, spinning on the ball of his right foot and using the momentum to drive Masamune home again. He'd trained for years to perfect the art of swordplay, and his keen eye told him Cloud had too. Though a little clumsier and not as refined—speaking of perhaps some self-taught techniques—innovation and a knack for picking up patterns in fighting gave Cloud the edge needed to keep up.

All of the General's frustration at Cloud's enigma was being vented as he swung the sword in a downward arc—using only one hand since he didn't actually want to kill him. The blond had clearly been hiding a lot more than anyone thought, and considering his skill with the blade it was almost a crime.

_Why?_ Sephiroth kept thinking, _Why would Cloud hide something like that?_

It was this revolving thought that kept Sephiroth moving in a constant flow of motion, never letting the blond stop for breath, no lull in battle. The constant pressure might cause Cloud to slip, and more importantly to break the classic SOLDIER form Zack drilled him in, and instead fight like what his master taught him. Sephiroth hoped to be able to pinpoint this, or at the least recognize where Cloud had learned swordplay.

Thrusting once more, Sephiroth wasn't surprised when Cloud leapt back, attempting to create space despite the considerable reach of Masamune. Logical, but useless. Sephiroth dashed forward quickly, blade fully extended, erasing the distance in less than a blink.

Sephiroth's speed was no match for the unenhanced, and Cloud knew that considering he didn't get much of a chance in the way of fighting back. He was only just defending himself, and more often than not was dodging within a hairsbreadth of each attack. All those years of fighting Sephiroth were actually proving to be a disadvantage now. If he had any chance of hiding anything, it was gone now. Cloud knew Sephiroth patterns; knew the rhythm of his combat since he'd fought him so often, knew that when Sephiroth extended too far to the side it was to follow through with a powerful second swing. He ducked just in time to avoid the first move of the attack thatwould have taken his head if hehadn't been careful. Masamune's razor sharp blade sang through the air, loping off a lock of hair as Cloud bent backwards to avoid the reflexive response.

It was survival instinct now though, as Cloud parried one sideswipe by Sephiroth. He recognized the follow-up combo move, catching the trust to his left side with the flat of his blade, and then jamming the tip into the ground, used his momentum to land a kick with his boot to Sephiroth's open chest.

The surprise in both combatants was palpable, and Cloud nearly dropped his sword because he'd just _kicked_ the General, except that his opponent recovered quickly and immediately made another swipe at Cloud's head. Barely evading it, Cloud tried to dash off to the right, only to be cut off by the end of Sephiroth's blade.

Quick reflexes allowed Cloud to duck under the vibrating blade, leaving Sephiroth temporarily open. The blond, in a moment of clarity, did not take the chance, instead opting to attempt to escape the situation.

Of course, for all Cloud's speed, it just wasn't enough. That he had the chance at all was something.

There was the whiz of the blade cutting straight through the air that tipped Cloud off. Unable to evade in time, Cloud flipped the broadsword over his back, shielding his heart in a move that would have been a lot more effective if his blade had been as wide as his buster sword. Fortunately, the blond's sidestep the split-second he realized this managed to save him from being speared, but it was a little too close.

Cloud spun and crouched, and Sephiroth reflected his stance. They both waited for a long second, eyeing each other, before the blond make a sudden feint to the left, then turned for a dash to the right, straight at the door.

Cloud stopped dead though as Masamune's tip rested just an inch from his unprotected neck.

"Yield."

Sephiroth's voice was cold, but his eyes were not. They were, rather, curious as they sized up Cloud's potential.

Cloud dropped his weapon, and as Masamune was drawn away from him, he could hear Zack's applause quite suddenly. All sound seemed to come back to him in a rush as his focus came back from his fight.

The blond dropped his gaze from the General's, mind turning over furiously. He had been set up.

"Cloud," Zack said as he approached, looking happy despite the warning in Sephiroth's eyes, "That was amazing. Why would you ever try to hide that?"

The blond tried to think, tried to come up with some explanation everyone would buy that would be difficult to confirm. At the very least, he needed to think of something that might get them off his back long enough for Cloud to arrange a back-up plan.

"I've been waiting for an explanation, Cloud." The way Sephiroth said his name made his heart pound, and not in a good way. Sephiroth had only ever addressed him by first name after Jenova took hold. He'd said it then with the sort of loving hatred of an arch-nemesis, now it was nothing like that.

"I…" His mind spun. What could he say? The time travel thing was impossible. Not only would they not believe him, but it was too crazy sounding. He could fudge it, but he didn't know what they were thinking, what theories they'd already come up with, and what might be plausible and what not.

"Spike, you know you're just worrying us, right?" Zack interjected slowly, though he continued to stand by Sephiroth.

Cloud ignored Zack's words, instead his eyes going again to Sephiroth before looking away.

There was always…that.

No one really wanted to question it. If they went looking, well, Hojo was great when it came to hiding things. It might be semi-believable. In fact, it might cover him in the future too. Cloud had not forgotten the mako treatments expected of all SOLDIERs.

He swallowed, even as he made up his mind in those last seconds. He didn't like it, but it was the only thing he could think of. It also wouldn't really be lying. Not completely, which in the long run made him feel better.

"I was… Hojo…"

What Cloud had imagined would be a painful, drawn out explanation, barely got past that. Zack's audible gasp, coupled with the tightened features on Sephiroth's face said it all.

Thank the Planet, Cloud thought with a huge sense of relief. They'd already guessed something like it. That would make this a lot easier.

"I was an… experiment." There was no need to hide his distaste. He wasn't lying at this part. "I don't have a number, but well… Hojo he…" Cloud sort of shrugged, playing up his discomfort in talking about it. If he'd learned anything from Vincent, it was to let people draw their own conclusions if you didn't want to implicate yourself.

He didn't look at the other's faces as he spoke. "It was a while ago, and I don't remember a lot, but… it changed me, and well SOLDIER…"

Zack came towards him as he spoke, and gingerly put an arm around him. Cloud stiffened, but didn't push him away. He felt a deep welling of guilt for deliberately misleading his best friend. "Look, I just… It's not that big of a deal." He meant it too. Zack's comfort felt strange, foreign even. It had been different when they'd both gone through the ordeal. Now though…

Sephiroth's face showed little though. He stared somewhere over Cloud's head, probably thinking of his own childhood.

There was an audible pause as Sephiroth refocused and moved to speak. "Where did it happen? And," there was a pause as Sephiroth seemed to hesitate, "How did you get out?"

Cloud swallowed, and Zack's hand rubbing his arm actually helped a little. "It was in Nibelheim, and I…" his gaze went to Zack's hand, and he didn't quite know what to say. "I was a failed experiment anyway," he murmured under his breath.

Both SOLDIERs heard it, though neither said anything outwardly.

"And the training?" Sephiroth said after a moment.

"When I got out… someone taught me." Cloud swallowed, his throat strangely constricted. "I didn't… didn't want to be weak anymore." Zack rubbed Cloud's shoulders, before shooting a look at Sephiroth that the blond couldn't interpret.

Nothing more was said about it.

At least, for now.


	29. I Remember When I Lost My Mind

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sephiroth has serious doubts, as does Reno, but outside Shinra's net something is moving.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I own nothing and make no money from this work. Anything recognizable to the Final Fantasy VII series and its associated parts belongs to Square Enix and affiliated companies.

"Mother?"

Elanor Strife was taken aback by the appearance of the three young men standing in the materia cave, and it didn't even quite register was they called her for several moments. The earnest expression on the boys' faces as they looked at her was making her uncomfortable.

"Uh, I'm sorry, did you get separated?" she asked.

"She has been calling for us but we can't find her."

Elanor was about to mention the pathway to Rocket Town, the only viable way they could have gotten here since she definitely hadn't heard about these young… gentlemen in Nibelheim, but one of the boys interjected before she could speak.

"Do you know where there is more of this stuff so we can find her?" The youngest, with shoulder-length silver hair, gestured quickly at the mako fountain she was standing by, and Elanor felt even more confused.

"Mako? Well, it's everywhere. This is a natural spring though." She paused, unsure if she should ask how mako was related to finding their mother. Something about these boys told her to watch her words. Though they didn't look dangerous at first glance, the way they stood there, how they looked at her, and those eerie eyes made Elanor very wary. The last time she'd ignored her instincts about a man, he'd left her alone with a newborn son.

"So, there are others?" asked the one with the longest hair.

Elanor was still not really sure what was going on, and it was making her nervous. She didn't know who these boys were or where they'd come from, but she trusted her intuition that something was very wrong with them. And how was mako related to anything? "Yes, I believe natural springs occur all over the world. And there's mako reactors…"

The biggest of the three, and most likely the eldest, looked strangely on the verge of tears at the mention of so many places. The middle one muttered something, and the eldest interjected with a petulant, "I'm _not_ crying!"

Elanor decided it might be best to leave while things were still calm. These boys were all armed, one with a gun, one with a sword, and the largest with some strange contraption on his arm. This wasn't altogether strange in an inhospitable place like the Nibel Mountains, but the three appeared a little unstable. It was likely something had happened to their mother, perhaps a beast had gotten to her, and they were… suffering from grief.

A very, very powerful grief.

"If you heard her calling for you, she might be on the main path to Rocket Town. I can show you where that is," she offered.

The three nodded, smiling at her. Elanor smiled back, though it wasn't quite as natural. There was something wrong with this situation, though she didn't know what. Disturbed by what her instincts were telling her, Elanor Strife led the three boys back out of the cave and to the main path, only half listening to their whispered conversation.

"If Mother… ever find her?"

"We need to free…have her …-enge."

"Who could be…ful… her?"

The rest of the conversation was lost as the wind began to whistle through the cave as they approached the entrance. Winter was coming on strong this year, and already the weather was showing signs of early winter storms. Many of the peaks had more snowfall than usual already.

Outside the cave most monsters in this area weren't very aggressive, so Elanor never had trouble before with them unless a real predator showed up. However, the three boys seemed to find every monster in the area—either that, or they drew them. Unfortunately, they also seemed a little trigger happy, and every monster was game for the middle boy with the gun, and if it got too close, the strongest one with a solid punch. Whatever strange thing was on his arm seemed capable of electrifying the beasts, and Elanor tried not to think about where he'd gotten it. She didn't like weapons and fighting, and seeing the boys fighting like this only made her think of her own son, probably doing something similar, she thought sadly. Shaking her head, she decided she would feel much better after a cup of hot tea in her home and a little more clarity.

"Well then, this route we'll take goes pretty much straight to the main path." So saying, Elanor led them around the outside of the mountain, being careful to avoid the slippery sections. As they rounded the final corner, passing between two boulders, Elanor showed them where the path continued up the mountain, explaining that they would circle up the mountain while she circled down, before their path rejoined the main one cutting through the forest.

She wasn't sure how to say goodbye, but it didn't seem to matter as the eldest boy spotted a lone fiend and raced after it, followed by a single gunshot from the one with the longest hair. Deciding to remain where she was, she cheerily waved at their disappearing facades, and hoped she had done the right thing.

The rest of the way down was familiar ground to her, so it was simply a matter of paying attention to wear the ice was and keeping an eye out of monsters. Though they grew fewer and fewer in number the closer to the village, most of the predators in the Nibel Mountains were nothing to scoff at. Elanor's mind wasn't perhaps as focused on the path and dangers as it should have been, but it was rare to see strangers in the Nibel Range, let alone such peculiar ones.

As she came around the bend that would put the famous Nibel Forest into view, Elanor saw the black smoke trailing into the sky. Like a huge funnel, it cut a wide line in the usually spectacular scenery, and it started right where Nibelheim would be. Horrified that a fire had broken out, Elanor rushed around the curve and in her hurry missed the patch of black ice. Her feet slid out from under her, and with a shriek Elanor Strife fell.

* * *

"It doesn't hold water."

" _What?_ "

"Cloud's story," Sephiroth said, his voice lacking some of his usual patience.

"Sephiroth," Zack sputtered, "Cloud's totally traumatized by it, and we went and made him tell us anyway." Zack had a rather pouty look on his face, but it belied the seriousness of the conversation.

"It doesn't explain anything. In fact, it's not even related to his swordsmanship. If it's even true."

Zack had been innocently enjoying his lunch in Sephiroth's office when the preoccupied General had blurted out his suspicions. It was the first time they had really discussed it since Cloud's impromptu revelation the previous day, and Zack really wasn't in the mood for this conversation now. Cloud had been _experimented_ on by _Hojo_. The First was still in shock over it.

"Oh come on Sephiroth, let's not push him. Just leave him alone for now," he said tiredly. He'd spent all night thinking about it, and the last thing he wanted to hear was more discussion on it. He'd trust Cloud to tell him the whole truth when he was comfortable.

Sephiroth still had a rather moody aura that told Zack this was far from over, and Zack didn't like where the conversation was leading. Sephiroth now seemed more fixated, if possible, on Cloud's bizarreness than before. He'd been distracted all yesterday and this morning, barely maintaining a veil of normalcy.

"What could be so vital to hide that he would disclose something like that— _experimentation_ ," the General spat with vitriol staring hard at his desk, "rather than tell us about his training."

Zack put down his pasta bowl and gave Sephiroth a hard look. "Seph, maybe it's simpler than that. Maybe Cloud was trained while he was… you know."

"No." Sephiroth shook his head, looking back up at Zack, eyes intense. "If Hojo was the head of the project, and Cloud was being trained at the same time, then the intention was clearly to make another weapon."

Zack winced at the term Sephiroth used so disparagingly, but he'd never really been able to completely eradicate Sephiroth's idea that he was built solely to be the greatest SOLDIER there was.

Sephiroth continued on oblivious or ignoring Zack's discomfort. "But Hojo's never indicated anything like that. In fact, he's never taken notice of Cloud before. Hojo is not the type to let something slip out of his fingers. And why would Cloud enter SOLDIER knowing he'd have to suffer mako showers and be put back under Hojo's thumb? It doesn't make sense."

Zack really did not like this now. Sephiroth was getting into dangerous territory. The kid had looked awful the second he'd told them, and Zack had felt a pang of guilt, even though he'd still rather know.

"Seph, you're practically obsessing over him, and I think it's because of whatever happened before this. At the end of the exam. Remember? You were acting _really_ funny, and I knew something was up."

It was a low blow to get Sephiroth off topic, and the look the General shot him was angrier than Zack expected. "You don't think I'm capable of considering things objectively?"

"Oh, come on Seph," Zack said again, frustrated now with Sephiroth's unwavering hounding of the subject. Sephiroth had been wound tight for days now, and Cloud's issues just seemed to be piling on top. "That's not what I'm saying."

"Zackary, you implied as much."

"No look, I'm saying you should take a break from thinking about Cloud and, you know, consider yourself."

"Perhaps you should do the same then."

Zack sat up in his chair at that. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"You are blinded by your affection for Cloud. I have been considering Cloud's sword techniques, and there's no denying his familiarity with the buster sword." Sephiroth was leaning back in his chair now, his voice like ice. "There are not many places he could have learned that."

"What do you mean blinded? I care about Cloud, and I'm just considering his feelings in this. He's not just a puzzle you know." Indignation was ripe in Zack's voice. He didn't take kindly to people talking badly about his friends, and he had certainly never expected it from Sephiroth.

Sephiroth was looking straight at him. "I'm well aware of that, Zack. However, what he withholds could be dangerous. At the very least experimentation means he could have an adverse reaction to mako, latent abilities, or a high potential for mutation. It's the risk factor I'm concerned with."

Zack cut in before Sephiroth could finish. "Well I'm concerned with Cloud's mental health."

Sephiroth's eyes narrowed at the interruption. "You are attempting to protect him when he doesn't need it— _blinded_ as I said." Then Sephiroth continued on before Zack could get another word in. "That he hides his training may imply he has dangerous abilities, or an attempt to hide from or protect something. Both are things that it is imperative I know for the safety of everyone else."

"Well I haven't seen anything of the sort, Seph. And I haven't done any training with him with the buster sword yet," Zack pointed out.

"It's not you I'm thinking of," Sephiroth replied sharply, "There are others trained in the use of buster swords." There was a tiny pause, barely a breath. "Like Angeal."

He'd said it. Zack's expression tightened instantly, and he stood up from his seat. "Angeal is dead, Sephiroth. There's no way he could have taught Cloud. No. Way."

Zack's outrage at the General's suggestion didn't faze him one bit. "Actually, it's perfectly plausible. There's a sizeable gap of time between Angeal's defection and his death."

"No."

That was the last word. Zack turned on his heel and left, heading down the hallway and into the elevator without a glance back.

* * *

The exam was over, and Reeve was actually looking forward to seeing Reno again. He hadn't quite realized what a welcome distraction these chats with him were.

Breathing in the mildly fresher air up on the roof, he leaned his head back just as he heard the slamming of the metal door to the roof.

"Tuesti," Reno said as a greeting, slouching over to him. As Reeve turned around he wasn't surprised to see Reno wearing the telltale Turk suit, though he'd taken liberties with the strict dress code. The white button up shirt was left untucked, the pants sagging a little lower on his hips than regulation, and the blue jacket slightly wrinkled and open. He wasn't undamaged from the exam though. The shine of a bruise on his left cheek was still there, and he didn't slouch quite as gracefully as usually did. Somehow Reno still carried his usual air though, despite the new outfit and bruises.

"Ah, Reno. Congratulations on joining the, hmm, Department of Administrative Research," Reeve muffled a laugh.

"Laugh it up Tuesti, but you and I both know that ain't what they do at all."

The overbearing accent made this even funnier to Reeve, but he smothered his outward amusement so as not to offend the prickly teen.

"Well, from what I've heard of the exams they were quite successful, though the General is as stressed as always."

Reno lit up a cigarette behind him, taking a drag before exhaling slowly. Reeve put his back to the edge of the railing on the roof to really look at the redhead.

"Well, that's nothing new. I was hoping to dig up more on him since I got new _clearance_ ," Reno managed to sneer as he said it, clearly believing his hacking skills made such clearance unnecessary, "but his info's locked up tight."

Reeve shrugged, playing it cool. "I'm not surprised."

Reno looked back up at the sky, and Reeve waited patiently for him to speak. Generally they traded off on who offered up information first. Reeve had no qualms about what this was—it was downright tame compared to many of the things high-ranking members of Shinra did.

Reno though was either hesitant, didn't have anything, or was weighing his options, Reeve couldn't tell which. Reno was still very much naïve in the much of the ways Shinra functioned behind closed doors, but Reeve knew as a member of the Turks that would change. It would also make him a valuable ally. For what, Reeve didn't know, but he feared Shinra could not continue on forever, and it was only a matter of time before something caused it all to come down.

"Alright, you know Veld?"

"Of course," Reeve replied immediately. Leader of the Turks, Veld, or Verdot as some people called him.

"Well, I overheard something in the office," the way Reno said it made _the office_ sound like a torture chamber. It most likely was to him. "They think he might be connected to AVALANCHE."

Reeve's eyebrows shot up. He had met Verdot on a handful of occasions, and the man fit his job to a T. That he might even be suspected to be passing information to the other side was big. He was in charge of the Turks—that meant he had serious confidential information at his fingertips, and he was in control of much of the information-gathering resources Shinra had.

"That's a serious accusation," was all Reeve said, but his mind was thinking through what this could mean. The outcomes could alter the whole company at the least.

"Yeah, guy's only head of the Turks," Reno remarked sarcastically, echoing Reeve's thoughts. "Pro'bly knows more about the inner working's o' the company than anyone else."

Reno went back to brooding over his cigarette, and Reeve couldn't help but ask what was bothering him. Perhaps the Turk training was more than he could handle?

"It's nothing," Reno responding, putting out his lit butt on the railing of the roof, "Just something that don't make no sense."

He didn't elaborate, and Reeve didn't ask.

There was another odd lull in the conversation. Reno seemed quite preoccupied, and Reeve was continued to enjoy the open sky for a while, remembering briefly that ray of sunshine in Aeris' church. The exams had been a low point for him in activity, with most of Shinra focused on the tests and no redhead to keep him thinking. That's how Reeve had found himself in Sector 7 for purposes utterly unrelated to engineering.

A chilly breeze swept by reminding him he was on the roof of Shinra Headquarters in December without even a scarf.

"Well, if we're on the subject of informants, you may not have heard this tidbit from a couple months back. Only upper-echelon Shinra and all that."

Reno noticeably perked up, and Reeve suppressed a smile.

"Ever heard of Lazard Deusericus?"

"What the hell kinda last name is that?" Reno scoffed, but he turned to face Reeve more fully.

"He was the union executive for SOLDIER—sort of like the manager of SOLDIER without actually being _in_ the army."

"Sounds like a pansy."

"He was not a fighter, but he was a brilliant man." Reeve recalled many a conversation about the slums with Lazard. Though not working closely together for the most part, Lazard felt strongly about the poverty in the slums, and it showed in subtle ways. What had happened to him was perhaps the strangest part of all this.

"You may recall a drug scandal with one of the cadet barracks."

Reno had a lot of curses to offer, especially for Tseng, concerning the drug scandal. Reeve hadn't quite realized it was _Reno's_ bunker that had gotten into trouble, but it was all the funnier—and ironic—for it.

"Was that you? It caused uproar within much of the military branches since the drugs were laced with mako. Other than the Science Department only SOLDIERs have that kind of access to open mako," Reeve smiled at Reno's brief pout.

"Well, that incident led to an investigation of the Science Department since no one confessed to where they mako came from. Lazard, who it's suspected now was meeting or at least funneling information outside Shinra, fled. They rounded up one of his spies from the department, but no one knows where's he's gone."

Reeve looked away from Reno and back up to the night sky, tucking his hands into the pockets of his coat more securely to ward off the chill. He hadn't been surprised by Lazard's sympathies, since he'd been peripherally aware of them, but there was more that didn't seem to make sense.

"Who was he giving the information to?"

"Another defector from Shinra; a scientist. No one's sure what he wanted to accomplish by that though." Reeve had always thought Lazard might be in league with AVALANCHE, or at least sensitive to their cause, but _Hollander_ had been totally out of left field for him.

"People defect often from Shinra?" Reno asked, looking quite curious.

"There's been a number, more after the war. Of course for every one who defects there's three people who want his job." Reeve shook his head, but the story of the First Class SOLDIERs who had defected wasn't something he'd share just yet. Most argued that story was done with after Angeal's death, but Reeve didn't think Genesis would go down quietly.

Finally the cold drove them back inside the headquarters, where they parted ways with little more than a nod, both brooding on what they'd learned and what they hadn't said.

* * *

Sephiroth rubbed his eyes tiredly, leaning one elbow on his desk. He'd tried to forget what he'd stumbled on in Hojo's files by analyzing Cloud's story to death and back, but all he'd come up with were more loose ends and more things that didn't make any sense.

It didn't help of course that he had a meeting with Hojo tomorrow that did not promise to go well. He'd avoided the last appointment because of the exam, and now he had Hojo's… _deception_ at the back of his thoughts. He still hadn't determined if he would confront the professor or not about it.

It was at that moment that there was a timid knock on his door. Sephiroth straightened, knowing Zack wouldn't even bother to knock—or speak to him now considering how he'd handled that last conversation without any tact whatsoever. Cloud just… frustrated Sephiroth, and he knew in retrospect Zack had been right on some level. He _was_ letting other things influence him about Cloud, namely Hojo. He still thought that Zack's refusal to acknowledge Cloud's hidden agenda was unwise though.

"Sir?" A woman asked through the door, and Sephiroth recognized the voice as the regulation army general's secretary.

"Enter."

The woman stepped in holding a file to her chest nervously. "Sir, this is a follow-up report from- from Nibelheim. It's marked urgent."

Sephiroth accepted the report from her, and she scurried out quickly shutting the door behind her.

Rubbing his eyes, Sephiroth considered waiting until tomorrow to read the report, but a glance at the rest of the paperwork he still hadn't gotten done, and the red-stamped URGENT on the front of this one told him otherwise.

Opening the folder he only briefly scanned the basic information about the area, stopping short though at the pictures clipped to the report on the next page.

The first was the remains of the Mt. Nibel Mako Reactor, a pile of partially melted and twisted metal and pipes still glowing the sickly green of refined mako. Reading the report thoroughly, it was clear someone had essentially ripped the place apart and blown it up, totally destroying it and most everything inside. The estimated time of the occurrence fit neatly into the parameters of the SOLDIER exam, as noted.

Sephiroth didn't let himself think beyond that yet. He flipped to the next page of the report and drew in another sharp breath. In bold letters on the top of the page was "Shinra Mansion", with a picture clipped to it of a burnt wreckage that bore no resemblance to the mansion Sephiroth vaguely remembered. Only the wrought-iron gate was familiar, the rest had been almost obliterated.

It was clear the same person or group had done this, and the report determined that they obviously bore a grudge against Shinra. Sephiroth knew though, almost instinctively, that this was a personal grudge against Hojo. Both of those places had been used for the scientist's experiments in the past, as Sephiroth knew well.

Getting up, Sephiroth opened up the boxes of debriefings from the cadets for the second examination, digging through until he found Cloud's. As he read through the notably vague record, he knew with certainty that this was Cloud's doing. The experimentation hadn't been a lie then, but there were still a lot of pieces missing.

Sephiroth returned to his seat, putting the report down by the two stark pictures. Hojo's involvement was very limited in all this, but it seemed Cloud took serious issue with him—or at least what he had done. The two sides didn't seem to match up, but Sephiroth was loath to bring attention to Cloud or Sephiroth's preoccupation with him. Not to mention he had other things to discuss with his… father.

Taking the reports with him, he gathered Cloud's debriefing from the first exam too and went back to his apartment. As he headed out he knew he would have to bring this up with Zack, much as he knew the other man would hate to hear it, and it would mean another meeting with Cloud. This one, he promised himself, he would not let personal feelings interfere with. He would have the truth from the blond.

* * *

There was probably no one as exhausted as Cloud these days. He'd barely been a SOLDIER for two weeks, and all he'd done was train with Zack, do conditioning with the other new SOLDIERS when he wasn't with Zack, eat and collapse on his bed and sleep.

Granted, most of this was self-inflicted. Cloud had gotten the sense from Zack that Sephiroth wasn't happy with him, and Cloud was just glad the General was inundated with the new SOLDIERs and paperwork missed during the exam. At least it gave him some chance to avoid him for now, and as long as he remained busy he could hopefully keep his luck up.

Reno though was determined, and after two near misses with each other, Cloud was bodily dragged out of his room at midnight by an irate, redheaded Turk. "You better tell me what the hell is going on, Cloud! How did you know me as a Turk?"

They were behind one of the maintenance buildings by the backfields, and Cloud was acutely aware of how easily their voices could carry on the wind. "It's complicated," he mumbled, both trying to keep his voice down and because he didn't really know how to approach this. It was one thing with Vincent, but Reno was an entirely different person, and his reaction was likely to be explosive.

"So what," Reno said irritably, dropping to sit next to Cloud, "You a psychic or something? Or just a lucky guess? I don't know what you were going for trying to get my attention with that, but you got me here now."

Cloud paused for the barest second, then decided there wasn't any way to make this sound any less crazy. He'd made the decision to tell Reno anyway. "I time traveled."

"You time traveled," Reno deadpanned.

"Yes. From nearly eight years after the SOLDIER Exam."

"Huh. And that's why you suddenly kick ass? 'Cause you were a big bad First before?" Reno didn't sound at all like he believed him, and when he mentioned being a First Class SOLDIER Cloud's shoulders slumped almost on their own accord.

Reno noticed unfortunately.

"What, you only made Second?" He snorted to himself.

"I failed the exam," Cloud said. "Then I did a bunch of missions with Zack as a trooper, before Hojo got us."

Reno paused and rubbed his cuffed sleeve under his chin. "You failed? And the crazy scientist guy got you?"

"Yeah."

Reno's eyebrows were definitely ready to climb into his hair if they got any higher. "…You know I don't—"

"There's this creature called Jenova. It's what destroyed the Ancients, and I need to kill her before she… contaminates the world. That's why I ditched the second half of the test, since she was supposed to be in Nibelheim's reactor. She wasn't there though."

"Oh come on," Reno said sharply, no longer sounded as incredulous anymore. "Be straight with me Cloud."

When Cloud didn't respond Reno stood up looking genuinely angry now and a little scared. "I don't know what the hell you're on, but time travel's impossible, and a monster that'll destroy the world? Seriously?"

Cloud shot him a glare, his own fraying temper sparking. "You don't have to believe me, but how else do you think I knew about Tseng's guns? Or you becoming a Turk? Or about Sephiroth? I don't have time to dillydally"—the words brought a sudden sharp reminded of Tifa to his heart, but Cloud shoved it aside—"Jenova is out there and a threat. You're a friend, and an ally. I'll need you're help tracking down where she is."

"Why don't you just go to Sephiroth? Or Zack, huh?"

"I can't because they were both… dead." Cloud wasn't looking at Reno now, only half thinking about what to tell him. It never got easier it seemed, no matter how many times he said it.

"Dead?" Reno asked a little hollowly. "The General? Dead?"

The redhead slowly sat down again, reading Cloud's sober demeanor.

"I didn't think it possible either, but Jenova… overcame him."

"And you beat her?" Reno found himself saying disbelievingly. He couldn't believe he was hearing this, but Cloud's face and body language were serious, and he knew that even if he didn't believe in time travel, it certainly made a weird kind of sense. After all, Reno himself had noticed Cloud's 180-degree turn in just days: the shooting practice, the rigorous training, the aced tests even when he slept in class, the personality whiplash…

"Yeah. With help."

"That how Zack died? And you feel like you gotta save him?"

Cloud looked up then, shaking his head. "No, he died before. Because of me."

Reno had always known Cloud might have a little bit of a guilt complex—he'd seemed like the sort of guy to always take the blame. He certainly blamed himself for a lot of shit, but this took the cake.

"You're blaming yourself for something that hasn't happened yet?"

"It did happen." Cloud made eye contact this time when he looked up, and Reno could see what he'd seen before in only bare glimpses: pain, regret, determination. "And I won't let it happen again."

Reno still couldn't quite believe the time travel idea, but Cloud seemed set on destroying that monster, and apparently without any help from possibly the strongest people in the world. Reno just had to shake his head.

"Why hasn't that Jenova thing killed anyone yet? You'd think we'd have heard about something like that."

"Jenova was used for experimentation by Hojo. She… woke up I guess, and that's when things got bad. It's not supposed to happen for another five years, but something's changed."

"You mean from your… other time?" It sounded stupid even when he said it, but Cloud's grim nod made Reno refrain from comment. They continued to talk a bit about what Jenova was capable of and how Cloud inadvertently became the leader of an almost completely different AVALANCHE, until they realized both of them would have to be up for training tomorrow. Cloud with Zack, Reno with his new partner Rude.

Later, when he'd rolled into bed still wearing the white button-up shirt of his uniform, Reno thought about how crazy it was to hear Cloud talk about hunting down a monster capable of killing the General with a ragtag group of people. He imagined Cloud in a straightjacket yelling at him to save Zack, and then Cloud ripping out of it with mako-green eyes to fight a tentacle monster. Reno didn't realize that no matter how ridiculous he thought the story, he never once considered not helping Cloud.


	30. More Questions Than Answers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sephiroth learns something about himself from Hojo, but not much from Cloud.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Writer's Note: Something you should know about this chapter: I have knowingly made a divergence from canon (if you discount time travel and Reno). I thought this was more realistic, with maybe a little bias on my part. My inner fangirl much prefers this because it's Hojo, and Hojo doing that…ew. (You'll know what I'm talking about when you get there.)
> 
> I'm working slowly on editing and uploading all the chapters I have now before writing new ones (up to 33 is already written). I desperately need encouragement though, so if you have a Tumblr please feel free to message me or recommend FFVII fan blogs to follow. I also will be trying to post status updates about GD and HwtF on my Tumblr too.
> 
> Disclaimer: I own nothing and make no money from this work. Anything recognizable to the Final Fantasy VII series and its associated parts belongs to Square Enix and affiliated companies.

Reno sat up in bed bleary-eyed, and rubbed his hands down his face. He swung his legs over the side, habitually ducking even though there was no top bunk, and shuffled off to the bathroom.

He brushed his teeth and splashed some cold water on his face to wake him up before gathering his stuff together. As a Turk he got his own tiny apartment, better than his old place in the slums but still not much larger than a coat closet. It had a working stove, which was awesome, but without a roommate it proved to be actually pretty lame. There was never anyone to talk to or bother, and it was eerie how quiet his neighbors were. If he'd known how awful it was to live alone like this he might not have-

The whole bizarre conversation with Cloud last night came back in a rush: time travel, some terrifying monster of Hojo's, dead General and SOLDIERs, and a lot of other crazy stuff that made no sense.

Planet, he must have drunk a lot more than he thought.

It had only been two shots when he'd realized he could look up Cloud's new bunker in the database and go drill him for answers, but there must have been some more drinks in there somewhere because his memory had to be a little foggy. Time travel. Like, going back in time to when you're younger to change things. That kind of time travel. The kind that's _impossible._

Reno shook his head, wondering if he'd been high and drunk at the same time, or if Cloud was, or if Cloud had really jumped off the deep end for good. He stared into the mirror for a couple seconds, wondering a little how he would look five or six years from now, a seasoned Turk, and what Cloud might look like. Maybe the blond would be a little taller.

Nah.

Reno snorted and stumbled back into his bedroom only to realize his bedside clock said he needed to be in a meeting with Rude in five minutes.

Pushing any discomforting thoughts of Cloud and time travel, the redhead hurried to pull his clothes on from where they were messily piled in a draw. He knew you were _supposed_ to hang suits, but he couldn't be bothered to get hangers or press his pants or anything. He'd already lost two buttons, anyways.

Reno wondered briefly though, as he locked the door behind him, if he'd make a good Turk. The thought was immediately followed by _I should ask Cloud_ , before he pushed it back. There was no way Cloud was serious. People didn't time travel. They just didn't.

* * *

Hojo was waiting for him in the examination room.

"Well, you've finally made it have you? I'm afraid this will have to be an extended visit since you missed the last one." The way the scientist eyed the General over his glasses was the only sign of his annoyance.

Sephiroth stiffly took a seat on the table as Hojo prepped a needle nearby. He loathed these examinations and Hojo more than anything else in Shinra. Hojo was the only one that ever really inspired… fear in him. Sephiroth hated it, but he couldn't seem to fight it, and so every trip down here was a test of will.

Rolling up his sleeves, Sephiroth didn't give Hojo the pleasure of looking away as the needle was inserted, bearing with the sickening sensation of his skin crawling as he drew blood. He tried not to tense up, knowing it would make it worse when the scientist withdrew the needle.

"Now, it's the same formula as last time, but I've had to double the dosage so effects may be more severe. I'd prefer to keep you here until all symptoms have stabilized and you can be monitored most efficiently."

Sephiroth didn't answer, knowing that Hojo had every intention of holding him anyway. He wanted to ask the question that had been bothering him for over a week now, before the appointment got under way. One look at Hojo's hunched form scribbling notes on a clipboard before looking up at him with that same mildly curious look he gave every one of his specimens—human or not—made Sephiroth's mouth clamp shut. He was angry with himself for the unwarranted cowardice, but couldn't seem to muster the ire up, and so he turned away trying to keep a deliberately stoic look on his face.

There was a handful more tests and standard questions before Hojo finally pulled out the cold case, which held the specialized mako for Sephiroth. The sickly green substance always called up a slightly nauseous feeling in the General, but he tamped it down as usual.

The question resurfaced though as he saw the mako; Hojo handling it with more care than he gave anything else. It wasn't like Sephiroth to hesitate like this, but this was not something he'd ever done before, and the rare occasions he'd angered Hojo stuck out in his mind. Hojo could bear a grudge, and he was well capable of making Sephiroth pay for it later—in the lab.

Sephiroth breathed in and out, calming himself. It was best to be direct with Hojo, he knew. He turned to face the scientist who was jotting something down on the same clipboard.

"You are not my father."

There, he'd said it. Sephiroth wasn't able to relax though, watching Hojo as carefully as possible for any visible reaction.

Hojo didn't even look up. He was, for all intents and purposes, completely nonchalant. "Hm?"

"I checked the database," Sephiroth said quickly, a little faster than he meant to. "There's an anonymous file with a parental DNA match to myself—male. It is not yours."

It was exactly what he had found. In his search for Cloud's files he'd gone deep into Hojo's database of human experimentation in Nibelheim. What had come up over and over again was his name. Though Sephiroth did not know the details, he knew his early years had been spent in Nibelheim before he was moved to Midgar. He was still hoping to do a little more digging concerning a certain new blond SOLDIER who was also from Nibelheim, but Sephiroth too was starved for information concerning his early life.

The file he'd been able to breach had a DNA string with information indicating it as his father, though the person remained unidentified. Because there was no name and no medical history attached it was clear this was not Hojo's DNA, which meant he was not Sephiroth's father as he'd been led to believe.

Hojo turned to look at him, holding one ready needle in his hand, and three more waiting still in the case. The fluorescent lights made it impossible to see his eyes as they reflected off the lenses.

"No, of course not. I do not have the time to worry about the emotional pandering required when inseminating a fertile woman. There are plenty of easy specimens to find if I need it." The scientist seemed completely unbothered by this revelation, and put the needle in his hand filled with glowing mako down on the tray beside him.

"I was told you were my father as a child." He kept his voice deliberately calm, but this was what particularly angered Sephiroth. The blatant lie had caused him a lot of mental anguish as a child, who had struggled to understand why his "father" did what he did to him.

"Proper psychological development is imperative in early childhood. Familial relationships offer substantial benefits to psychological stability and growth. As the primary caregiver in your sensorimotor and preoperational stages, it was only logical."

Hojo continued to ignore him as Sephiroth heard the monitoring machine begin to beep more quickly as he blood pressure went up. Even though a part of him was relieved it was true he was not related to this madman, it opened up an entire series of questions regarding his parentage and how Hojo had gotten a hold of him. This along with twenty-six years of ignorance made his anger potent.

The first needle was administered while Sephiroth absorbed what Hojo was telling him and all the implications of it. He hardly even felt it. As Hojo checked the monitors for a reaction, the scientist commented calmly, "It is ill-advised to steal Lieutenant-General Zackary Fair's computer to hack into my files, Sephiroth."

Sephiroth was not surprised Hojo was aware he'd been there. The man was completely paranoid, lending to his enlarged sense of omniscience. Still, it was a slap in the face, and Sephiroth managed to calm himself a little, knowing that even though he was the General of SOLDIER, murdering Hojo would bear terrible consequences. He was fairly sure he entertained the idea every time he came here though.

The nasty turn of the General's thoughts were disrupted as another needle broke the skin, and he began to feel the first waves of the concentrated mako. The effect wasn't too strong yet though, and Sephiroth was determined to get some answers at least, regretting that he had waited so long.

"Who was my father then?" He asked, turning to look at Hojo, his eyesight even sharper than normal thanks to the extra mako in his system.

Hojo prepped the next needle, looking at the monitor again. He paused for just the briefest of seconds, perhaps remembering his father, before he said in a bland voice:

"A man of little significance other than his sperm."

* * *

Three days later, Cloud stood in the SOLDIER showers rinsing off a day's worth of sweat, dust, and metal shavings. The training in SOLDIER was much more intensive, mostly because they didn't have lecture classes to give them breaks, and also because this was the eight new SOLDIERs' probation period.

Though technically in the SOLDIER program, they were on probation for one month—essentially barring them from missions—because they hadn't been given a mako injection yet. That would forever designate them as true members of SOLDIER. Cloud was dreading it.

The delay was for several reasons. Mainly it was to complete full physicals all the new SOLDIERs were required to have, and to determine which troop they would join. Each squadron of Thirds was led by a Second, and each troop had a general emphasis, whether it was magic, long-distance combat, or otherwise.

But first, as everyone was constantly reminded, were the injections. Though they'd passed the initial test, Cloud was well aware there was a significant difference between a chest swab and a needle.

Cloud shampooed his hair furiously, ridding himself of any thought of the impending mako exam. He had a month to prepare himself mentally for it, and he promised himself he would be ready.

After rinsing and dressing, he headed out of the showers hoping to get something to eat before collapsing on his bunk. His plans were derailed though by the sight of the General waiting in the hallway outside.

"Strife."

Cloud snapped a salute as the other boys all looked curious but were smart enough not to ask. John brushed past Cloud reassuringly as the others all left them for dinner.

"Come with me."

Sephiroth led him down the hallway in the opposite direction from the dining hall and barracks, silver hair swaying slowly from side to side. Cloud recalled all of Tifa's breathing exercises to remain calm, trying in vain to keep from jumping to conclusions. Sephiroth wasn't dressed to fight, though he was wearing his leather pants and boots, but the office shirt said this wouldn't be violent. That could only mean interrogation—that, Cloud knew, was even worse.

They left the building and moved towards the gymnasium specially built for the SOLDIER Firsts. Sephiroth swiped his card through the scanner and opened the door, not even looking back as he headed inside. Cloud embarrassingly considered the idea of bolting, but one look at the imposing General said that was a bad idea.

Cloud had only been in this building with Zack once, when the First and the General had tricked him into a fight, so he was quite surprised when Sephiroth led him into a white-walled room with bright windows and cushions piled in the corner.

He must have paused too long, because Sephiroth answered his silent query.

"It's a meditation room."

Cloud hadn't seen one since he'd last been in Wutai, and it was surprising to see one in Shinra.

"Oh."

"I hope it is clear that this is more informal." Sephiroth indicated the whole room with his hand then tossed Cloud a cushion, but didn't sit himself.

The blond carefully put the cushion on the floor but remained standing too, curious and wary.

"You know exactly what this is about," the General stated bluntly. "I hope we will be able to do this as two men. From one soldier to another."

He said it coolly, standing across from Cloud looking perfectly relaxed. The blond could feel how intensely he was being scrutinized though, and knew they were both equally on edge.

When Cloud only nodded but didn't say anything, Sephiroth started.

"Your swordplay is excellent, but you've been concealing it. I want to know why and who taught you."

One of Sephiroth's long bangs fluttered a little in his breath, the only movement in the still room. Cloud had, thanking his lucky stars, prepared a highly abbreviated version of events just in case of this. It didn't take away his nervousness though. The blond fought not to fidget under Sephiroth's stare, trying to draw on the calmness of the room, and the strength he seemed to have had a lot more of before he time traveled.

"When I left Nibelheim to come join SOLDIER, I met a man. He used a buster sword and helped me out. Saved my life even." Cloud exhaled slowly, and didn't make eye contact. He thought of Zack he'd seen just last night at dinner, mussing his hair and calling him Spike. It was a painful reminder of the ghost of the same man leaning against the doorway of the church, walking away with Aeris. Walking away from him.

He shook his head and tried to relax, taking a deep breath, drawing it in and savoring it before exhaling out. Tifa had taught him that.

"He… died though. Shot."

"Who was he?" Sephiroth's deep voice seemed to hang in the air between them.

Cloud looked up, staring at the eyes that glowed even brighter than Zack's did. "I'd rather not say."

Sephiroth gave him an appraising look, clearly suspicious. "I'm aware of that." He paused for just a moment before speaking. "I will ask again: who was your teacher?"

Cloud narrowed his eyes a little, noting the slight tilt of Sephiroth's chin. They were both being stubborn about this, but Cloud had a lot more to lose than the General, and he wasn't just motivated by curiosity. "I can't tell you."

"Why not?" Sephiroth asked immediately.

"It's personal."

The General paused, seeming to think about his response. "I had hoped we might be able to set this to rest. Can you tell Zack even if you can't tell me?"

Cloud shook his head, knowing that telling either of them wasn't an option.

"Hm." They shared a brief stare, Cloud trying to convey nonverbally that there was no way Sephiroth was getting this out of him, and it seemed to get through, much to Cloud's surprise.

The General flicked one of his long bangs out of his face, managing somehow not to look haughty as he did. "I hope you know this isn't the end of the subject."

"I know," Cloud told him.

"I sincerely hope you trust Zack or I in the near future to tell us." Something about the way Sephiroth said it, told Cloud there was a threat in there. If he didn't tell, the General would find it some other way.

Cloud swallowed down the uncharacteristic smirk. Sephiroth could do all the research he wanted, but the only one's who knew of Zack's role were himself and Vincent, and no one knew the ex-Turk was even alive.

Sephiroth made eye contact again, and the narrowing of his eyes almost gave Cloud a chill. Almost. He managed to check himself lest the General's sharp eyes catch a sign of weakness.

"Why did you hide your abilities?"

This one was easier to answer. Cloud moved away from the door, considering how long this was probably going to take. They'd gotten through the hard stuff at least. "I didn't want to make waves. I—I've been bullied before, so I figured it was better to only show off for the exam."

"Despite the fact that it would have almost guaranteed a place in SOLDIER?" Sephiroth's tone was neutral, but there was plenty of doubt underlying it. Cloud couldn't really blame him.

"I was worried I would fail the medical test anyway. Nibelheim has a big reactor just outside it." Cloud shrugged, looking through the windows on the far wall. Sephiroth always seemed to look particularly ethereal when wreathed in sunlight. The blond shifted his gaze away back to the blank wall. "We've been…exposed to the radiation before. I had heard it makes us more…susceptible to it."

Cloud and Sephiroth both knew he was not just talking about general environmental radiation, but his experimentation history too. Cloud tried to judge the General's expression, but Sephiroth's face didn't reveal any of his thoughts. The blond didn't dare offer any more information than he was prompted, since he hoped to minimize the amount of information Sephiroth could get. One day he would tell him, one day. Long after Jenova was dead.

Sephiroth's gaze focused back on him. "I do not fully believe you, Strife."

Cloud hunched a little unconsciously, but otherwise didn't say anything.

"Your swordplay teacher still interests me," Sephiroth commented.

Cloud shifted his weight a bit, wondering how he could get out of this. Sephiroth let it drop once, but he wasn't liable to do it again. It wasn't like Cloud could tell him the truth, but he didn't want to make someone up because Sephiroth had all but said he would go hunting for information. Then he'd know Cloud lied, and that would just make things worse. "Why does it matter? He's dead," he half muttered to himself.

"It matters, Strife, because anyone outside Shinra with that kind of skill has to be accounted for. It is also related to your experience with Dr. Hojo." Despite Sephiroth's perfectly flat tone, Cloud could sense some emotion behind it, and his face tightened imperceptibly.

He knew Sephiroth's relationship with Hojo was more than a little complicated, but he wasn't entirely sure how Sephiroth felt about the man directly now. Did he hate him? Tolerate him? Grudgingly respect him? After the Nibelheim Incident things had been different. But well… everything had been different after that.

"I've told you about that already. I'd rather not speak of it." Cloud hoped this interview would be over soon. The way Sephiroth looked as he moved highlighted the color of his hair and made him look slightly inhuman—his face too perfect with those proud cheekbones and almost cat-like eyes.

"I too, was an experiment of Hojo's," he said almost stiffly, and if Cloud hadn't had such practice at maintaining a poker face his jaw would have dropped. "I am still in many ways."

Cloud shifted uncomfortably, unsure where this was going now. It was one thing if Sephiroth was looking for answers, but another if they were sharing confidences.

"Um…"

"I do not need to know details, but you are aware that by joining SOLDIER you will inevitably come into contact with Dr. Hojo at some point?"

Was Sephiroth… _concerned_ about him? Cloud felt his cheeks turn a bit red before he could help himself.

"Um, well, yes. But I don't think he'll recognize me." Cloud knew what he said was a mistake the moment he saw Sephiroth's eyes flick off to the right, his gaze more shuttered.

His voice somehow managed to be perfectly flat and yet still convey how tightly he spoke. "Were you quite young?"

Cloud hated to lie, but seventeen had still been childhood for him, because everything that came afterwards erased it.

"Yes."

They stood there stiffly in silence for some moments, both perhaps reflecting on those experiences. Cloud had never dreamed of any real kinship with Sephiroth, since the General had always seemed far worse off than he. Then again, Hojo's human experimentation was pretty much limited to Sephiroth, SOLDIER, which was on a broad basis, and Project S—the cloning Cloud had been a part of—which hadn't happened yet. Perhaps because of this…

Sephiroth spoke abruptly. "What I need to know is if there is any risk of mutation or side effects. Mako is…unpredictable."

It was a legitimate concern, and Cloud didn't really know. The Planet must have intervened to give him some resistance to mako's debilitating effects if he passed the initial test this time, so he could only hope that carried through.

"I…don't think so."

Sephiroth made eye contact again, his eyes sweeping over Cloud in one move. The blond felt himself begin to blush again, even though he knew there had been nothing sexual about it.

"You don't have any mako enhancement or glow, so I can assume there was no mako involved?"

Cloud swallowed uncomfortably. He felt quite embarrassed by his reaction, and his eyes drifted to Sephiroth's loosely curled fingers, the broad shoulders more visible now under his white collared shirt, and the form-fitting leather pants that made him appear so tall and well, powerful.

Cloud winced when he realized his train of thought.

"Maybe I should go, sir."

Sephiroth seemed to gather himself from that strange moment that had overtaken them with the talk of their experiences with Hojo. "I would prefer you stay another moment. The identity of your teacher is still important to me. Why are you protecting him?"

Cloud paused, momentarily unsure what to say. "I—I'm not protecting anyone."

"You refuse to tell me his name. If there were no threat upon him, it would be no matter."

"Well, he was a highly personal person, and I…" Cloud didn't know what to say, and the garbled lie only seemed to give him away.

Sephiroth didn't appear any different, but Cloud had a feeling something had changed when the General said nothing else about it.

"I would ask that you keep no more secrets from Zack or I, but I have a feeling you won't." Cloud fought the reddening of his cheeks. "I only ask that you keep an open dialogue with us, and following your mako injection I want you to seek out one of us so we can assure you are alright."

Cloud nodded his head, looking away at the mention of the injection. He hoped it would get easier with time, because the idea of having a mako injection every couple of months hanging over his head would ruin SOLDIER.

"Cloud," Sephiroth's hand paused in the air for a moment before landing on his shoulder. "This is for physical reasons as much as it is for… psychological ones."

The blond consciously didn't stiffen his shoulder at the touch, amazed at Sephiroth's attempt to comfort him.

"…Thank you, sir."

Sephiroth's hand slipped away after a moment. "I wish to observe some of your practices with Zack, and perhaps spar again with you. Is that all right?"

Cloud felt a rush of excitement and nervousness at that. "I'd be honored, sir," he managed, his stomach twisting strangely. He'd come in here ready to walk on eggshells the whole conversation, and somehow he'd left with a sparing invitation. "Um, well, I'd better go before curfew then."

"Yes," Sephiroth said, almost too quickly. "I intend to speak with Zack about what we spoke of."

Cloud nodded his head, feeling strangely pulled in two directions. He wanted to escape to think about everything that had happened, but he also wanted to stay because this was the longest he'd _ever_ spoken to Sephiroth.

"That's okay, I figured. Thanks, uh, sir."

"Sephiroth," the General said softly.

"…Sephiroth," Cloud echoed, his whole body feeling rather numb.

* * *

Sephiroth remained in the meditation room after Cloud left. He pulled his boots off and sat down on the cushion in the middle of the room, wanting to think about their exchange.

He knew he could have gotten the answers he'd wanted with a little leverage. He had come into this prepared to tell Cloud he knew about his actions in Nibelheim, but somehow the despondent, tired voice of a young soldier made it more difficult. Sephiroth hadn't thought at all before he'd admitted what he was to Hojo, and what he'd learned of Cloud from that had cinched it.

The General decided he would keep what he knew close to the chest, and see how things played out. Other than Cloud, he was certain only he knew of the blond's involvement in the Nibelheim disasters, and he had not told even Zack.

Breathing in and out, he recounted the whole conversation, memorizing as much as he could. His assumption about Angeal seemed to be proven right by what Cloud had said. His mentor was dead, had saved his life even, and had wielded a buster sword. Cloud may or may not have lied about the manner of death, or he was misinformed, but either way the evidence was still mounting. Cloud had joined the cadet program before Angeal's death, but then there had been the open attack on Midgar by Hollander's forces in April. Genesis and Angeal were both very visible during it. Sephiroth had little doubt Cloud had known of Angeal's wanted status after that, if he hadn't known before.

As he thought back to Cloud's reaction to mention of the mako injections and Hojo, Sephiroth was a little surprised by Cloud's lack of fear of being recognized. As Sephiroth envisioned the blond in his head again, with broad shoulders, a well-sculpted face with a hint of baby fat, the things that jumped out of course were his bright blue eyes and his… spiky yellow hair. How did Cloud expect Hojo not to recognize that?

Frankly, he didn't seem to fear Hojo as much as he did the examination itself, which was curious. Was it because he'd successfully attacked two of Hojo's early strongholds without punishment? Or was the hairstyle something new? Sephiroth had been under the impression it was natural, considering how it moved when he moved and looked quite soft…

Sephiroth blinked, realizing his thoughts were trailing off into dangerous territory. Breathing in and out again, he willed himself to think of nothing for the next half an hour before he headed home and overanalyzed everything said just like he always did.

* * *

Vincent Valentine had excelled as a Turk, but that had been twenty-five years ago. The world had changed quite a bit since Vincent had last had to do any investigating.

Despite the difficulties of adapting to the new technology and shifting political powers, within a couple of weeks he was ready to stop haunting Rocket Town and assist Cloud on his quest for information concerning Jenova. While the blond's goal was to ultimately destroy the monster—and Vincent wholeheartedly agreed with this—the ex-Turk had a more personal revenge in mind too: Hojo.

And where Jenova was, Hojo would not be far behind.

Vincent's search took him first to Costa del Sol, a rambunctious seaside town that boasted quite a number of wealthy homes and beach houses. It was easy to pick up information about Shinra's recent economic acquisitions and pursuits, but little about the Science Department or SOLDIER was to be heard.

After some deliberation, Vincent decided Icicle Inn would be the first lab to check outside Midgar. When he had been assigned to Hojo, there had only been a handful of labs, mostly located in remote areas or reactors. Icicle Inn had one of the oldest, including Professor's Gast's research notes if Hojo had not destroyed them, so it made sense to check there first.

The boat ride over was uneventful, and the ex-Turk took a circuitous route to Icicle Inn, trying to avoid any attention from the people in the area. Bone Village was still the same depressing hovel Vincent had heard of, and he didn't stay long considering how remote the village was. It was not until he passed through the Forgotten City, an area generally avoided by the populace, that he noticed some oddities.

"The trees…" he murmured, examining the shattered remains of one of the Forgotten City's iconic crystallized trees. It would take a lot of force to shatter them like this, and there were more signs indicating something had happened here.

As Vincent walked through the trees on one of the few paths in the forest, he saw the signs of fighting: broken earth, bullet casings, snapped branches, scuff marks and more broken trees.

The center of the Forgotten City had a lake and a strange spiraling structure, all part of the remains of the ancient city. Checking the inside did not reveal anything of note, but more signs of recent activity showed up. A campfire had been made in one spot not far from the lake, and more trees had been disturbed here.

Curious, but not perhaps related to Jenova's disappearance. Vincent filed it away as he had been trained to do, so that the pieces might fix together later.

* * *

"Hey Cloud, I wanted to ask you something."

Zack propped Galatine against the bench as he took a swig from his canteen. Cloud sitting beside him did the same before wiping his mouth with the back of his hand.

"Sure," the blond said after a moment. He was still panting a bit after their hard workout. Cloud had expressed real interest in learning the buster sword, and Zack had been more than happy to teach, though he couldn't deny the mild suspicion Sephiroth was already harboring.

Cloud was _good_ , make no mistake, and Zack had been able to run through the basics a lot faster than he expected. Now that Cloud wasn't holding back anymore it made the sessions a lot more fun. He hoped what he had to say didn't kill the mood though.

"Seph told me what you and him talked about a couple days ago," Zack said a little uneasily. Sephiroth had seemed a lot calmer after talking to Cloud, and Zack felt like he was a little out of the loop. Something had changed between them.

"Oh," was all Cloud said, taking another drink from his canteen.

"I just wanted to ask if there was, well, anything you wanted to say to me that you didn't, you know, want to say then."

It sounded awkward even to Zack's ears, but he was genuinely worried about Cloud, and he knew the blond had a small crush on Sephiroth—who didn't at his age? Sephiroth could be intimidating though and hard to talk to, so Zack hoped between himself and Sephiroth Cloud would have someone to share everything with.

The blond didn't look at him, just back at his canteen like it might help him escape the situation. Zack felt a little guilty for doing that to his friend, but he knew if he didn't push, Cloud might not say anything at all.

"There's nothing."

Zack couldn't suppress the mild pang of disappointment. "Okay. You know I'm here anytime." He paused for a second to think of another topic, before remembering why Cloud had been a bit delayed for their session. "Did you get your appointment for the injection?"

"Yeah. It's the Tuesday after next, 0730." Cloud looked so glum Zack just reached over and slung an arm around his shoulder drawing him in before he even really thought about it.

"I know it sucks Spike, but the first one's the worst, and after that it's just routine."

Zack rubbed Cloud's hair, secretly loving when Cloud tried to duck out from under him out of embarrassment. He stopped though when he remembered what he really meant to ask. "Oh! Did you want me to be there and make sure you get back all right? Sometimes people can be really woozy afterwards."

Cloud looked a little embarrassed, and when he slumped a little more into Zack's chest, the SOLDIER First couldn't really help himself from rubbing those bright yellow spikes.

"Trust me, it'll be better than embarrassing yourself by undressing in the waiting room and sprinting through the Headquarters all the way to the showers." Zack smiled fondly at the memory, and it widened when Spike's blue eyes suddenly blinked up at him.

"What?"

"Yup. I made Second and no one could come get me, so I thought I'd make it home on my own. The dose was more than I expected though, and thankfully I don't remember much." Zack laughed it off, feeling better inside as Cloud sat up more fully to appreciate the humor. "Trust me, it's worse when your buddies have to tell you what happened. Same thing applies to alcohol."

"I thought SOLDIERs couldn't get drunk?" Cloud's strange expression vanished after a moment.

"Where'd you hear that? Sure we can, just gets harder the more mako you have. Seph would be sober even if he drank a whole bar's worth of liquor." The somewhat sad expression on Cloud's face made Zack hasten to fix it. "It's not like he'd like getting drunk anyway. Seph's too much of a control freak like that."

Cloud's half smile said Zack didn't really fix it, but it was a good try.

They started the second half of the lesson, Cloud practicing a variety of new moves Zack had been teaching him. While Zack supervised, but his mind kept drifting back to his conversation with Sephiroth the day before. The General had told him what he talked about with Cloud, and he'd made it clear that he believed more than ever Angeal had been the one to teach Cloud.

In an attempt to stifle the thoughts, Zack tried to think of something more fun to show Cloud when he realized he knew exactly what to teach the blond.

"Cloud, I want to teach you this awesome move. You know what a trump card is in cards?"

Cloud nodded. Of course he did, Zack thought with a smile, he was friends with Reno.

"Well, we sometimes call them Limit Breaks in SOLDIER. You kinda have to make up your own as you go along—play to your strengths and all that—but this one's the first one I learned with the buster sword. It's really simple, so anyone who's ever wielded a buster sword has learned it. It's called Braver. You can pretty much customize it all you want once you mastered the basic idea."

Cloud's open smile and interest made Zack grin back. This was something Angeal had taught him long ago, as a start off so he could make his own Limit Breaks. The move was quite simple but powerful, and his old mentor had taught it to him the second day he'd picked up the buster sword.

"Alright, you need to adjust your hands into a straight grip, since this is an overhead swing. In battle, if you want to deal a final, devastating blow, you leap back, and do a really high jump, high as you can, and slash downwards right on the ugly."

Zack demonstrated the overhead swing, watching as Cloud carefully hefted his buster sword over his head. Pulling it up like that took some practice because it was awkward with such a heavy weapon.

"Okay, the idea is that you lift the sword over your head as you jump up—momentum and all that—and as you come down you chop downwards. Just make sure you swing early enough to get the monster but not the ground. First time I did this I ended up gouging the floor and seriously dulling my blade."

Zack grinned again, remembering Angeal's stunned face as the First had been forced to use his mako-enhanced strength to wrench the sword from the floor.

Cloud started to practice the jump minus the sword under his direction, but wasn't able to get very high.

"Don't worry. When you have mako it'll make it a lot easier. If you put materia in your sword you can even add some magic to the hit, which'll do even _more_ damage!"

Cloud was able to do a perfectly arched swing in just a couple of tries, but by the end of the lesson he still couldn't jump high enough to get over anyone's head. Zack ruffled the blond's hair when he seemed disappointed, even pouting a little though Cloud would have been horrified if he realized.

As Cloud left to go shower off, Zack put Galatineaway and headed up to Sephiroth's office. Zack didn't like to be jealous, but he couldn't seem to help himself. If Angeal had trained Cloud—which was looking more and more likely—then he should be… well, maybe not excited, but he shouldn't be upset with his deceased mentor, and definitely not Cloud. It certainly wasn't the blond's fault, and if Sephiroth was right, and Cloud was trying to protect Angeal, then well shit, did Cloud know of Angeal's death?

The elevator doors open as he realized the situation could be really messy. He was pretty sure Cloud also didn't know Angeal had mentored him too otherwise he would have mentioned it. Zack liked to think so at least. But that would mean he'd have to break it to Cloud what happened to Angeal… and who killed him.

"Hey Seph," he called as opened the door.

"Zack," Sephiroth greeted.

The First flopped into one of the chairs, but this time didn't try to put his boots on the desk. Sephiroth frowned at him, and set the folder he was working on aside.

Zack floundered for a second about where to start, then figured the beginning was best. "So, I had a lesson with Cloud today, and I asked him about your conversation on Tuesday. He didn't have anything to add, but I can tell he's really nervous about the mako injections. And I'm gonna pick him up from the labs that day."

Sephiroth nodded, but when Zack didn't go on he gave the stalling SOLDIER a look.

"I assume you didn't ride the elevator forty-five stories just to tell me that."

Zack had the grace to look a little sheepish. "Well, no. See, I taught him my old Limit Break—Braver—have you ever seen it?" Sephiroth's dry look said he didn't care if he had. "Okay, okay, so it's one Angeal taught me ages ago, right after I started the buster sword. Anyway, I'm pretty sure Cloud's already learned it before."

Sephiroth's face didn't outwardly change, but he subtlety leaned forward. "I thought that move required a jump."

"Well, it does," Zack added, "but you can do it without it, it just won't be as strong. The actual swing though is awkward—you know, over the head, straight down. Not the sort of thing you do normally in battle. But Cloud didn't even take a hair off his head."

Sephiroth sat back a little. "He didn't lodge the sword in the floor either, I presume?"

He delivered the line so flatly it took Zack a second to realize what he was referring to. "Hey! I had just started getting mako injections, and I was new to it!"

It was halfhearted, and Sephiroth seemed to sense that. Zack continued anyway, glad a little that Sephiroth had made the effort to lighten his mood. "Yeah. I definitely would have lobbed off some hair doing that, but Cloud was fine. He'd obviously done it before, though probably not with the jump since he couldn't get high enough."

Zack ran a hand through his hair. Normally he wasn't that great at admitting he was wrong, a flaw he was working on, but it seemed even harder with Sephiroth who was rarely wrong in anything but purely social matters.

"I think Angeal taught him."

Sephiroth looked quite grave, and Zack was thankful the man didn't rub it in his face, even though he knew it would not have been intentional. The General said quite seriously, "We may need to debrief him, considering he may have learned something regarding Hollander or Genesis while he was with Angeal."

Zack nodded hollowly. "Do you think he…knows?" He couldn't quite bring himself to say it, but Sephiroth knew what he was talking about immediately.

The General rested his cheek in a gloved hand as he eyed Zack. "It's hard to say. Either he's guarding his mentor's memory or he believes him still alive somewhere."

"I've got to tell him then."

Sephiroth didn't say anything, and Zack knew he reluctantly agreed. Somehow the image of him and Cloud laughing over Angeal's personality quirks or teaching methods paled in the face of admitting what happened not even a year ago.

The General seemed to understand without being verbally told, and he changed the subject. "I expect Cloud will be put in a close-combat group. Heavy or light?"

Zack tipped his chair on its back two legs, happy to talk about anything else, his boot pushed against the edge of the desk as they came back to familiar territory. "I'd say light. He's kinda small," Zack half-smiled. Cloud would probably kill him if he heard that, "but he's tough. Maybe when he's more adjusted to mako and a little older he could do heavy. A buster sword's not really a light-armor weapon."

Sephiroth nodded. "There are eight stationed troops of Thirds in Midgar." Sephiroth pulled out a binder from one of his desk drawers and began to flip through it. "The only light-combat platoon is under Captain Kyle Harke."

"Huh, I don't know him."

Sephiroth glanced up. "He wields double daggers."

Zack paused for a second before it came back to him. "Oh wait! I saw him a couple weeks ago in a practice session," Zack said, recalling the slim, black-haired man who had some impressively fast footwork. For someone using short daggers though, that was a necessity. "He doesn't seem too bad."

Sephiroth shot him a look that said he'd already guessed Zack was going to scope out the guy before he let Cloud join his squad.

They discussed it some more, including Zack's regime for Cloud's training, before Sephiroth knew he had to kick Zack out. The First took the cue, and stood up before remembering something.

"One more thing," Zack said, already preparing a begging look even though he knew he wouldn't really need it. "I'm supposed to train with Cloud next Wednesday, but I've got my mako injection that morning, and I don't know what shape I'll be in."

Sephiroth sighed, but inwardly was quite excited at the prospect of sparring with Cloud again. He hadn't forgotten that Cloud had managed to knock his blade away and land a hit on him. No unenhanced, not even a _Second_ , had done that before.

"Alright, Zack." Zack cheered, and Sephiroth knew he'd spend next week waiting for Wednesday.

* * *

Cloud rolled his shoulders and stretched out his sides, warming up for practice. These practices with Zack were thrilling but brutal. His arms and shoulders ached constantly, and the First seemed to really enjoy pushing him to the brink of his ability. Even though Zack believed he wasn't hiding anything about his swordplay anymore, it wasn't exactly true. He couldn't physically perform almost any of the moves he could before, and so he'd probably be rusty when it came to the more difficult forms, but he still _knew_ them. When Zack had taught him Braver last week, Cloud had been nervous he might give something away, but was both relieved and disappointed when he couldn't even do the jump. It was one thing for him to know a simple Limit Break like Braver though; it was another to know more advanced things that couldn't be taught in a couple of months.

The door behind him opened, and Cloud bounced on his feet a couple of times, warming up the muscles there. When he didn't hear any customary Zack-greeting, he turned around.

"G-General?" He hadn't meant to stutter, but Sephiroth in battle uniform was quite the sight, and it brought up mixed emotions. He looked good, no one could deny it, but it was also a similar outfit to what he'd worn in Nibelheim—and what his later incarnations always came back in.

"Cloud," Sephiroth said with a nod. "Zack had his mako treatment this morning, and asked me to stand in for him."

Cloud nodded mutely.

"I don't use the buster sword, so this won't be a lesson, just a spar." He sounded amused, and Cloud managed some noise of agreement before he dutifully picked up the buster sword he'd set aside earlier.

"Warm up with some katas, and then we'll begin."

He did as told, running through the steps of a basic kata modified for the buster sword, all the while aware of Sephiroth's eyes. The General circled him slowly as he warmed up, not making any corrections, only watching. It was unnerving, but Cloud was getting more used to his scrutiny, and was able to perform and keep half a mind on him at the same time.

"Good. We'll start with a freeform spar, just to see what you need to practice."

Cloud nodded, getting into a defensive position, the buster sword held in two hands before him. Sephiroth positioned himself fifteen feet away more casually, Masamune lying deceptively calm in his left hand; the tip almost touched the floor six feet away.

Cloud nodded to show he was ready, and Sephiroth immediately moved into range, swinging Masamune fast in a long sideswipe. Cloud easily parried, but the force of it made him take a step back. The blond didn't let this stop him though, and instead used his momentum to bring the buster sword from low to high, knocking against the lower end of Masamune. They stalled there for a second before Cloud leapt back and delivered another strike at the end of the sword. Unlike Cloud's previous battles with Sephiroth, it didn't have enough power to knock the sword to the side to open the General up, but Sephiroth seemed to approve by the tilt of his lips.

As the fight progressed, Cloud felt almost… _weird_. He was fighting _Sephiroth_ , but there was no malice, no animosity as they fought. Every time he'd clashed blades with the General before, it had been with a torrent of emotion. It got stranger though as they remained on the ground, despite Cloud's instinct to jump into the air to avoid some of Sephiroth's moves. The blond couldn't remember the last time he'd fought any real opponent with both feet on the ground. Mako and magic made anti-gravity fighting very possible for the experienced enough, and it was a much more versatile style that Cloud preferred. Now, tied to the floor like this, fighting Masamune without those sickening hate-love-anger-remorse emotions, made the whole fight surreal.

Neither spoke as they fought, and even though Cloud was severely outmatched and easily out of breath long before Sephiroth ever broke a sweat, it was one of the most enjoyable times he'd had at Shinra since he'd come back. Sephiroth wasn't using any of his enhanced strength or speed, but he seemed to enjoy it too, if his partial smile after some hits was to go by.

Nearly ten minutesinto the fight, Sephiroth called for a break and Cloud immediately flopped down on the bench, letting his breathing slow before he took a drink.

"You excel at compensating for varying blades, and you've deduced the pattern of the battle extremely quickly," Sephiroth complimented, and Cloud was infinitely glad he was already red-faced or his blush would have been prominent. He didn't think Sephiroth had ever genuinely praised him before.

Still holding Masamune, Sephiroth took a seat beside him on the bench as Cloud carefully sipped his water. A comfortable silence lingered between them as they both took advantage of the respite, even if Sephiroth didn't need it.

Cloud's eyes drifted to the long sword, the delicate appearance belying its obvious strength. He didn't actually know much about Masamune, despite having faced it innumerable times, and Sephiroth had always seemed to have it, especially after Jenova. Cloud remembered countless times he'd seen the crazed General leave it behind only for it to reappear with him. Did it have any magical properties?

"Who made Masamune?" He hadn't really meant to say it aloud, but he didn't regret it.

Sephiroth looked down at the sword and spoke after a long moment, his voice slightly deeper than usual. "There is a story of a great Wutain mage, who stole the blade from a beast called Gilgamesh. Gilgamesh, it was said, was the greatest warrior of the summons, and forged the blade in the fires of the core of the Planet, and cooled it in the light of the moon."

Cloud watched with interest as Sephiroth lifted up the sword, examining the worn grip and the finely polished guard.

"From there I do not know what became of it. I was given it when I began swordplay, though I could not use it for many years. I have never wielded another sword since."

He looked at Cloud, but the blond's eyes were on the famous blade. He had been made to bleed with that blade, but in battle it had been mesmerizing nonetheless. The memories of those fights would never be forgotten, but in this moment the danger of the blade was outshined by a mutual appreciation of it. Quietly he asked, "Do you know what it's made of?"

"A form of Damascus. I've never let anyone really study it to see." Sephiroth's eyes were amused and curious when Cloud made contact with them, and he was inexplicably embarrassed.

"Sorry," Cloud murmured.

"…Not at all," Sephiroth said after a moment.

The comfortable silence returned, and Cloud took a final swig of water before wiping his mouth and standing back up. "Should we continue?"

Sephiroth stood up gracefully, and Cloud was suddenly aware of his short stature compared to the General. He knew he had a couple more inches to grow—or at least he hoped Hojo's mako hadn't done that, because he didn't want to be 5'5 forever. Sephiroth, who he knew stood a little over six foot, looked much more imposing.

Sephiroth swung Masamune around twice, the whistle of the blade cutting through the air was quite loud in the silent gym. Cloud returned to his defensive position, blade up, before the General shook his head.

"This time, you are the attacker. I want to see an aggressive attack. Have you done any field training yet?"

"No," Cloud said, adjusting his grip and stance. Now the blade rested at an angle, the sharp edge facing his opponent. "Zack said he wanted to do a weekend training trip."

"Hm… To the Aldanna Mountains south of here I assume?"

"I think so," Cloud answered. Sephiroth looked like he was thinking about it, but he didn't say anything more.

Cloud slid back into position, and Sephiroth did the same. The moment they made eye contact, Cloud ran forward, leaping to the right the moment he was close enough. Despite Sephiroth being left-handed and therefore more adaptable on his left side, the length of Masamune actually made it more difficult for the General to fight on that side. Granted, with Sephiroth's speed, agility and reflexes, it wasn't much of a disadvantage.

The General didn't outright attack, but he defended and frequently counterattacked, keeping Cloud on his toes. For the first minutes it was a constant push against the General. Cloud had one major victory though when he ducked a blow by Masamune and swung with the buster sword, hitting near the edge of the six-foot blade at an odd angle, causing it to vibrate in the General's hand. The momentary opening was enough for Cloud to swing up again in a move to cut vertically from pelvis to shoulder. Sephiroth was forced to dodge backwards in a blur to Cloud's eyes less he get hit, and Sephiroth's outright smirk at the unexpected move sent a thrill through the blond.

They kept at it for some minutes more before Cloud began to seriously tire. He simply didn't have the endurance to keep up, and finally Sephiroth called it quits. He wasn't even breathing hard, but Cloud rubbed his hands down his sweaty face and grimaced.

"Your ingenuity in battle never fails to surprise me," Sephiroth said.

Cloud couldn't really think all that clearly, the adrenaline and rush of the fight still flowing through him. "You're awesome, too," was all he could say while he caught his breath.

Sephiroth laughed; a very short, quick chuckle that made Cloud blink. He didn't think he'd ever heard the General laugh before. He'd had a cruel, mocking laugh once upon a time, but never something so genuine.

"Thank you for the spar, Cloud," Sephiroth said formally.

"Thank you," Cloud returned a little out of breath, and after a beat, "Sephiroth."

It was probably good hisface was still red from exertion; Cloud muttered that he was going to take a shower and beat a hasty retreat.

In the shower under the hot spray, his mind slowly began to clear from the fog of battle high. He'd been sparring with Sephiroth. Talking with him companionably. Things he'd never dreamed of doing.

It might be selfish of him, or immature, but he wanted this. He wanted to know Sephiroth as he was before the Nibelheim Incident. He wanted to know what drew him to this man, what made him…care so much.


	31. Faces Beneath My Skin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cloud and Reno chat, Reeve and Aeris chat, but there's no lighthearted talk about Cloud's first mako injection.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Big hugs and thanks to all my readers, you all have been so supportive! I was totally tearing up after some messages and reviews from you guys and your dedication to this story. I'm sorry I so epically suck at updating it.

Cloud sat on a bench outside SOLDIER Training Room D wiping down his blade. With all the New Year celebrations it had been hard to find any peace and quiet. The monotonous repetition of wiping the cloth on the sword was where Cloud had always been able to find the most calm.

He had written a letter to his mother for the New Year, and could only hope it made it there in time. He hadn't heard from her in awhile, but it was just as likely Nibelheim was inaccessible this late in winter. While it rarely snowed in Midgar, Nibelheim could be hit with a snowstorm as early as September some years, and it might not let up until April.

The sound of raucous voices coming down the hall signaled the end of his quiet. Cloud put the buster sword back in the weapons closet and headed back to his room, figuring he could message Reno to see how he was doing. Other than a couple brief encounters after that night where he had admitted to time traveling, they had seen little of each other. Reno hadn't brought up the time travel again, and Cloud wasn't sure if he was angry, disbelieving, or still digesting.

As it turned out, Cloud didn't have to wait long to find out.

"You, me, a nice long talk," Reno said the moment Cloud walked into his room.

"Here?"

"No, I know somewhere more private."

Twenty minutes later a poorly dressed Cloud was standing on the roof of a seventy-story building in January.

"Okay. Let me just say this: I think you're completely insane."

Cloud had known Reno would be a lot harder to convince than Vincent—who had actually bought the story on pretty much faith—but the blond realized he might have underestimated just how skeptical Reno was.

"It's true," was the only thing Cloud could say.

Reno sighed and pulled his knees up a bit to better ward out the cold. "I still don't believe you," he said, looking straight at Cloud, "but I know that this means digging up dirt on Shinra, and you know I'm all for that."

The new Turk sounded rather reluctant, but Cloud appreciated the sheer leap of faith Reno had just shown him. He may not believe Cloud's story, but he was helping anyway. It was really too bad he and Reno had been enemies during AVALANCHE's time.

"Thanks," Cloud said softly, looking in the direction of where his home had once been out in the desert.

"Yeah," Reno said a little gruffly, "I'm only helping you because you're crazy, and it means blackmail on Shinra execs."

"I know." Cloud sat down across from Reno, huddling in. He'd only worn combat pants and a long-sleeve shirt, not expecting Reno to take him up so high. The wind was particularly sharp up here, and mountain boy or no he was still cold.

"So," Reno said after a long pause, "Where should I start?"

* * *

Reeve headed through the Sector 7 slums, keeping his head down and his eyes on the ground. After his first trip to meet with the Flower Girl, he was more aware than ever of how much he stuck out under the plate. Even in his oldest coat and pants he still felt like he was wearing a sign declaring he wasn't from the slums. He could only hope it wasn't obvious he worked for Shinra.

The first meeting with Aeris had been a real eye-opener, and Reeve had been waiting weeks to meet with her again. She had warned him of the Turk's watchful eyes, and Reeve knew meeting with a wanted fugitive could land him without a job.

Still, Reeve knew with a firm determination that this was right. The slums and poverty were wrong, the draining of the Planet's life energy was wrong, and the corruption and abuses of Shinra were wrong. While he was no AVALANCHE member, he certainly sounded like it in moments like this. It was a good thing he knew the Turks were having a training session today back at the HQ; otherwise he may be more than out of a job. He might need to check the consequences of a "breach of contract" on the Shinra Employee Contract he signed ages ago.

Crossing the open pavement in front of the chapel, Reeve pushed aside the door and stepped in, smiling as he spotted the characteristic pink dress crouched by the flowers.

"Hello," he called, and Aeris turned around, a smile on her face.

"I wasn't sure when I'd see you again. How have you been Reeve?" Her hands were caked in dirt, the knees of her dress covered in soil, and she looked perfectly happy. Reeve couldn't remember the last time he'd seen someone so happy in Midgar.

"I'm fine, had a quiet New Year, and you?"

They exchanged pleasantries for a while, and he crouched down to help with some of the weeding Aeris was doing as she talked. "It's been pretty quiet around here. I don't think the Turks are monitoring as closely as they used to."

"There's been some upheaval in the department," Reeve admitted, mind going back briefly to Reno. He supposed the Turks just didn't have the resources or interest committed to keeping up with Aeris. Perhaps Tseng felt differently about the situation regarding her.

"There's been rumors around about AVALANCHE," Aeris admitted, tugging up a weed with practiced efficiency. Other than her hands and knees her dress was otherwise unsoiled, but Reeve's old clothes were speckled with dirt.

He wiped his hands on his pants and looked at all the dirt under his fingers and caught in the wrinkles of his palms. It had been a long time since he'd done something so… hands-on. He'd been a paper-pusher at Shinra for almost sixteen years now.

"What sort of rumors?"

Aeris' lips quirked up a little. "They've been quiet, so some say they are planning something, others that the leader is ill."

Reeve noted that she didn't mention any connection to Shinra. That hadn't become news apparently, neither Lazard's disappearance or questions about Veld's loyalty.

"Speaking of problem-people in the slums, what about Don Corneo?"

Aeris sat back from her work, absentmindedly petting a flower petal before rising to sit on one of the old pews. "He pretty much runs Wall Market. Have you ever seen him? He's awfully rude to women."

"Does he run that club…?" Reeve made sort of a vague hand gesture, feeling an uncharacteristic blush.

Aeris giggled, "Yes, that's his. Pretty much everything in Wall Market is."

Reeve sighed, remembering the bits of rumor he'd heard about Shinra's alleged funding of Corneo. He would have to talk to Reno and see where the Turks were on this.

* * *

Reno and Cloud had moved from the edge of the roof over to the side of one of the air conditioning units, hoping to stay out of the wind's path. They had been talking for nearly an hour now about potential targets to get information from. Cloud already had a list in mind, namely secretaries for executives and major project managers. Reno figured he could put surveillance on most of those computers to keep an eye on things, and keep a back door open in case he wanted specific was ambitious, but Reno looked positive gleeful.

"Hey, speaking of weapon's research and the Science Department, you ever heard of a guy named Hollander?

Cloud narrowed his eyes slightly, and that was all the tell Reno needed.

"What do you know?" Cloud asked.

"I overheard something about defecting scientists, and his name came up." Reno shrugged, looking intently at Cloud.

"He was in charge of two SOLDIER Firsts who defected during the Wutai War," Cloud told him. "He disappeared too. He might have a handle on Jenova since she wasn't in the reactor."

"You think he might know?" Reno asked.

"He and Hojo are pretty much enemies. He used a different experimentation to make two super-powered SOLDIERs, but Sephiroth with the Jenova cells—"

"—Proved stronger and now he's jealous and wants to one-up him. Planet these scientists are predictable," Reno cut in. Cloud was about to comment when Reno spoke again abruptly. "Hey, do you know who replaced that Lazard guy as SOLDIER exec, or whatever they call it?"

"Wait, Lazard's not there?" Cloud said sharply.

"No," Reno said looking a little confused. "After the drug thing with our bunker they did an investigation of the Science Department and he split. Turns out he was funding this guy Hollander. Think he might have been helping Hollander out with this Jenova thing?"

Cloud's face lost all expression as Reno finished his explanation. "What is it?"

"Lazard didn't leave yet, I'm sure of it. He had to have left after the attack on Junon, because he definitely helped Hollander there. I remember getting mission orders from him, and there was the incident at Icicle Inn with Zack… That means things are changing."

"Attack on Junon?!" Reno interrupted, not hearing anything Cloud said after that.

"AVALANCHE attacks Junon. And then Hollander escapes from Junon just before the… But Lazard leaving means…"

Reno wasn't quite able to follow everything Cloud was saying. "Wait, they caught Hollander?"

"Zack did."

"So then he's in custody right now?"

"Yes."

To Reno this was blatantly obvious, but Cloud seemed to be slow on the uptake. "Then how could he have Jenova?"

"Genesis. Or the clones."

"Clones. Great." Cloud's expression was hard, determined, and Reno's sarcasm was lost on him. Deciding to get back on track with Lazard, rather than worry about Cloud's foreseen "future", Reno returned to the point. "Do you know why he was funding Hollander?"

Cloud only shook his head. The action coupled with such a serious expression made it rather grave. "No. But I do know he injected himself with some of Angeal's cells and then went after Zack."

"Who's Angeal, and why the hell would anyone inject themselves with his cells?" Reno asked half-rhetorically.

Cloud tried to explain, but he didn't know most of Lazard's story himself. He had only remembered bits and pieces from what little of Zack was in him. He knew Lazard ultimately had helped Zack, but he didn't know what this meant for the timeline of events. As things changed Cloud knew events would change that he could no longer predict, but Lazard's early appearance might mean events were speeding up. And that meant less time to find Jenova and destroy her.

"We need to get a bead on Jenova. Hollander might know something, otherwise only Hojo would."

Reno recognized the note of steel in Cloud's voice and didn't dispute him. "Okay, you worry about the space-time continuum, and I'll worry about Hollander. If he's being held by Shinra, then I can see if they did any interrogation reports."

"Yeah," Cloud said, and he stood up and stretched a bit. He didn't feel so cold now. "I'll see what I can remember about Lazard."

* * *

Tuesday, 0730, Cloud was sitting on the examination table in a small, sterile white room. He concentrated carefully on not swinging his feet, a nervous habit he'd thought he'd kicked.

This would be not only his first meeting here with Hojo, but the first injection of mako; the first step on an inevitable road. Cloud knew this was necessary, a choice he'd made when he'd come back, and there was no way he'd back out now. Still, it didn't make the actual injection any easier.

Two nurses, one male one female, entered the room carrying a small medical case and a clipboard. Cloud kept one eye on the door as they worked. The woman began to take his vitals while the male nurse jotted something on the clipboard before handing it to him. "You'll need to sign this waiver beforehand, just promising you know the side effects and so on."

Cloud looked over it, knowing that this was essentially an agreement to use his body for Hojo's scientific research. Some lines jumped out at him including "…not hold Shinra Inc. or affiliated agents accountable for any complications such as aneurysm or cardiac arrest associated with…" Cloud sighed, but accepted the pen offered to him and scrawled his name as illegibly as possible on the bottom. There was nothing he could do about it, and they all knew it.

As the first nurse unwrapped the blood pressure monitor from his arm, the door opened to admit Professor Hojo. He was exactly the same as Cloud remembered him, from the chemically stained lab coat to the unkempt hair and glasses. Cloud affixed his stare to the far wall, trying to combat the innate revulsion to what he was doing. _Necessary_ , he reminded himself. _Sacrifice._

Out of the corner of his eye Cloud could see Hojo move to the case to prep the mako, while the nurse swabbed his arm and prepared him for the needle. The blond focused on one spot on the wall and reminded himself to breathe in and out. Just seeing Hojo brought back a host of memories, none good. The thought of killing the scientist right now made it slightly more bearable. It would be impossible to get away with of course, but the thought was nice.

His nerves must have been obvious to the nurse, because she tried to comfort him. "It's okay, plenty of SOLDIERs don't like needles. If your mako levels are high enough, you'll be able to take the showers and that's far easier. You just have to get through this one for now."

She smiled, but it did nothing to help Cloud's state of mind.

She backed away and Hojo came over. Cloud tried not to flinch as the scientist picked up his arm and tapped the crease of the elbow several times to make sure the vein was clear.

Cloud fought hard to clear his mind of any memories of mako by focusing solely on the Omnislash kata. Imagining the movements in his mind, he repeated it over and over again as he felt the pinprick of the needle followed by the slow burn of the mako moving into his bloodstream.

It hurt, creating an ache that sluggishly flowed up his arm and tingled all the way to his chest. Before he realized it Hojo had removed the needle and was carefully cleaning and disposing of it as the nurse from before came over with another big smile on her face. The scientist left barely minutes after he arrived.

"Now, we'll wrap it up, and I hope you have a friend to help you back to your barracks. Normal side effects include shaking, sweating, sensitivity, mild nausea, disorientation, heightened aggression and vivid dreams. Side effects should continue for at least an hour, though up to three is normal. If after four hours you're still feeling it, please come back. You may feel out of sorts all day though, given that it's your first one. Okay?"

She looked too cheery for Cloud's tastes as the male nurse helped him off the bed. Already he could feel a strange energy in his limbs, and his vision sharpened noticeably. The male nurse escorted him down the hall to the waiting room where Zack was chatting up a Second next to him.

"Spike! How you feeling? Thanks nurse, I'll take him from here."

Zack slung an arm over Cloud's shoulder and started to guide him to the door.

"Zack, I'm fine," Cloud said, but the SOLDIER First knew better.

"You may not feel too bad now, but wait for it to hit you. You'll be ripping your clothes off in no time." Zack winked and walked Cloud to the elevators arm ready to offer support.

"So, not so bad right?" Zack asked cheerfully.

"I can feel it in me."

"Eh, that's normal. Just tell me if you're gonna puke."

Cloud's normally pale face was a little flushed, but that might have just been the reaction. Zack knew how much it sucked the first time, and he didn't envy Cloud now.

"Just remember Spike, it's all worth it in the end."

Cloud didn't say anything to that.

Zack managed to get the new SOLDIER to his apartment before the blond could totally lose it. He'd begun to complain about the itchiness of his clothes as they stepped out of the elevator, and he'd started to say some strange things when they entered Zack's building. Cloud seemed to have more of a mental reaction than a physical, which was both good and bad. He wouldn't puke on the carpet, but he also had moments where he didn't seem aware it was Zack with him.

"Hey Cloud, let's get you in the bath okay, the water'll feel real good," Zack coaxed as he helped Cloud to undress, tossing his boots into the bedroom. Luckily the First had been able to draw a bath in the adjacent bathroom while Cloud murmured to himself on the bed.

"It's like the ocean, remember? After the truck?" Cloud asked. He didn't slur, but his eyes weren't completely focused.

"Yeah, like the ocean," Zack repeated, unsure what Cloud was talking about or even who he thought he was talking to. It was a little funny, but Zack wouldn't laugh because he knew this was the mako's doing. Hallucinating could be just as dangerous as violent physical reactions.

When Cloud started to wobble trying to pull one sock off, Zack chuckled slightly at the response he would get from the blond tomorrow when he told him about this, then started to tug at Cloud's pants until the younger man started to squawk.

"Zaaaaaaaaack," and the image of a whining eight-year old Cloud popped into mind.

"Oh come on, it's nothing I haven't seen before."

There was a small struggle, but Zack came away with the pants. "Okay, you do the last bit and get in there."

Cloud looked over at the water then back at him, and Zack suddenly knew Cloud wasn't looking at him anymore. His pupils were blown and had the slightest edge of mako glow. His face slipped into a familiar stoic mask, and it was eerily like that moment when Cloud stared right through the one-way mirror at Kunsel after the interrogation.

"Cloud?" Zack asked cautiously.

There was no response, and suddenly the blond's bare foot caught Zack in the stomach, causing him to stumble back into the open doorway.

"Cloud?" Zack said again, only this time with a serious note of worry in his voice. Whatever Cloud was hallucinating, it wasn't good.

The blond didn't seem to even be himself anymore. He was in nothing but boxers in a bathroom but he looked so fierce, every line of his body confident and strong. Muscles tense and ready for an attack.

"Hey Cloud, it's me Zack. Remember you had the mako injection—" Zack reached out to Cloud, but the blond snarled.

"Don't touch me!"

Zack hesitated for a moment, knowing he could very seriously hurt his friend, but he needed to get a hold of him and make him see through this delusion. With the mako in his veins he could be dangerous to both himself and others. Without any control over his own strength and thinking he was fighting a monster, this could get ugly fast.

Cloud began circling, possibly hoping to make a break for it, and Zack quickly made his decision.

Coming in he ducked a punch and caught the wrist, pulling it to his side for leverage to hopefully pin Cloud down. Before he could get a hold of the second arm, a knee hit him right in the femoral artery, knocking both of them to the ground. Zack winced as his shoulder went down against the doorknob of the bathroom closet, but it was too late to regret such close quarters.

Cloud said something, but in the midst of scrabbling for purchase on the blond's small body Zack didn't catch it. He did catch the punch to the face though, and managed to dislodge Cloud's hold on him long enough to pin him face down.

"Cloud, remember me, it's Zack, your friend. I don't know who you think you're fighting, but you gotta stop before you hurt yourself. It's just the mako—"

Cloud bucked up as the last word left Zack's lips and threw his weight to the side, managing to come down on Zack's arm. There wasn't enough power to break Zack's enhanced limbs, but it damn well hurt.

Zack cursed, and fumbled to catch an ankle before Cloud could sprint into the bedroom. He got a hold and quickly dragged him back into the room, using his enhanced speed to jump up and dodge out of Cloud's way and into the bedroom. He managed to close the bathroom door and grab his PHS. When no banging started up on the door, Zack made his call short.

"Seph, I need you at my apartment ASAP."

Trying to remember if there were any vents in the bathroom, Zack tried to talk Cloud down.

"Cloud, it's Zack. Zack Fair. SOLDIER, your friend. Remember the buster sword? Or that switch-hit technique we did last week?" Silence. "You're seriously scaring me, Spike."

There was no response from the other side of the door. Zack hoped to the Planet he was still in there and maybe with some measure of calm.

"Seph's coming," he added after a moment. He had no idea if that would do anything.

"Sephiroth's dead," was the short answer, the voice eerily flat.

"What?"

Before Zack could follow up though, his apartment door opened and Sephiroth came in. He had to have run to get there so quickly. "What is the emergency?"

"It's Cloud," Zack told him, noting the work attire. "You might want to roll up your sleeves. He practically kicked me out of the bathroom, and I can't get him to calm down. He even just said—"

There was the sound of someone falling on tile, and Zack hurriedly opened the door.

"Zack?" Cloud sounded very small suddenly. "Are we going to make it? What if he comes after us?"

Sephiroth crowded the door behind Zack as the First went over to the fallen blond.

"Hey, what are you talking about? You're going to be fine. I'll need to run the water again since it's probably cool, but it'll all be gone in a couple hours." Zack tried to be as soothing as possible. He wanted to hug Cloud, but he knew his skin would be overly sensitive for a while and wasn't sure what response he might get.

"I wasn't ready," Cloud said, but when Zack asked him for what he stared blankly forward and seemed unaware the First had spoke.

When Zack looked at Sephiroth he thought he caught a glimpse of sympathy before the mask returned.

"Let me just get him in and I'll tell you what happened."

Zack ran the water again as Sephiroth watched Cloud, undoubtedly looking for signs of mako poisoning or an attack.

"I don't think it's abnormal hallucinations. Just… violent ones. Like some of the older SOLDIERs get."

"Hm." Sephiroth didn't comment.

When the water was ready, Zack helped Cloud up and led him over to the edge of the tub. The blond didn't protest as Zack moved to help him finish undressing when he suddenly seemed to seize up, his whole body going tense.

"Cloud?" Zack asked nervously, one hand still on the band of his boxers.

The blond abruptly moved away in a sharp, jagged movement. He glanced behind him at the wall, but seemed to see something else. "W-We should go. What if they come again Zack? Zack?" Cloud's face was a mask of worry and an uncharacteristic dose of fear.

When Zack didn't immediately respond, Cloud whispered the tentative plea again.

The First seemed frozen for a second too long, because Cloud's face again morphed into that blank coldness they'd seen in the interrogation room.

Before Zack could even formulate a thought, Cloud's hand went straight for the throat, and he was forced to parry the blow or end up with a crushed windpipe. Because of the momentum though he stumbled over the edge of the toilet, falling hard between the toilet and the wall, and consequently Cloud got to the other end of the bathroom where Sephiroth was waiting in the doorway. The blond ducked Sephiroth's grab and went for an inside-knee kick that was blocked. They shared a short flurry of blows before Sephiroth was able to catch a grip on one forearm, twisting Cloud with it to disable both arms at once. In seconds the blond was face first on the bathroom floor, Sephiroth holding him down with one arm.

"Zack," Sephiroth said. He could just see the other SOLDIER scrunched in the corner of the bathroom, groaning curses.

"This is going to bruise tomorrow," was all Zack said as he steadied himself, one hand on his lower back.

Sephiroth's free hand moved to the center of Cloud's back as the blond started to struggle, a warning not to try.

"Cloud, we're not going to hurt you. Remember us?" Zack tried, and when the blond seemed to relax marginally and turn his head towards him, Sephiroth relaxed his grip a bit.

"Zack?" Cloud mumbled, half into the floor and half in his general direction.

"Hey buddy, you remember me?" Zack's relief was palpable. Cloud was coming out of it.

"Yeah, we were… we…" Cloud blinked fuzzily and lifted his head off the floor, looking confused before he seemed to refocus on Zack, eyes sharper than they'd been since the elevator. "Zack?"

"You remember anything?"

Cloud tried to shift his arms, and Sephiroth slowly released him. When the blond looked back at the General, there was a flash of surprise and pain before he began to turn bright red. "What happened?"

"You were suffering from a vivid hallucination. Do you recall it?" Sephiroth supplied.

"N-No," Cloud said, and seemed to realize suddenly his state of undress. He hunched over himself, and Zack couldn't hide the amused smile.

"How do you feel? That's more important."

"My skin is… itchy."

"Well, let me run the bath water _again_ , and we'll see about that." Zack smiled and ruffled Cloud's hair as he stood up to go and add hot water again. Sephiroth stood up as well from his crouch and offered Cloud his hand.

The blond took it and stood up, and Sephiroth noticed his embarrassment turned not just his cheeks red, but a fair bit of his neck and upper chest too.

"I apologize if you are bruised or hurt in any way. You seemed to be under the impression we were going to hurt you, and fought well in…" Sephiroth didn't bother to hide the slightest curl of a smirk as his eyes flicked to the boxers and back, and Cloud's ears even took on a faint red tinge.

"Yeah, you were way out of it," Zack called, his grinning face looking back at them. "You even said Sephiroth was dead to me."

"I did?" Cloud's voice cracked and the blush drained away faster than it had appeared, making him look even paler than normal. Sephiroth was rather curious about the reaction.

"Do you remember that?"

"No," Cloud said, his voice and face unreadable. For some reason this troubled Sephiroth quite a bit.

"Let me or Zack know if you remember anything from the…delusion."

Zack announced the bath was ready before the blond had to think up a response.

Minutes later, Cloud was drifting in the hot bath, but unable to fully relax. He remembered everything in a strange blur up to entering the bathroom. After that it was… images. Memories. Fleeing with Zack from Hojo. Then from the Turks. Dipping his hands in the ocean. Flashes of gunshots.

Cloud sunk down further into the bath until the water went up to his chin as Zack knocked and cracked the bathroom door open. "Hey Cloud, seriously I've always got an ear for you," Zack said, and even though Cloud couldn't see him he could tell from Zack's tone he was frowning. "What happened was… violent. Sudden. You were really scary Cloud. I… I know you want to become a SOLDIER, but your face was…"

The First paused for several seconds, and Cloud knew he'd really scared him. Badly. The blond's eyes drifted down to the bubbles, feeling a sense of shame and a strange sort of regret.

"No emotion. Like you were… a robot or something."

_A clone. A clone bred to be nothing more than a copy of a perfect SOLDIER. And a failure at that._

"If there's anything on your chest, anything from before Shinra you want to talk about… I'm your friend Cloud, and I want to help."

Cloud kept staring into the bubbles and didn't respond as the door closed.


	32. Making Friendship Bracelets

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There are a lot of friendships in this chapter: distant (Vincent and Cloud), tentative (Reeve and Sephiroth) and cherished (Cloud, Zack & Sephiroth). But the crowning point is a weekend training practice between the three SOLDIERs.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And now ff.net and Ao3 are entirely up to date! New stuff to come (finally! I can hear you all say)!

Ex-Turk Vincent Valentine was standing over the contorted body of a mercenary. The mishmash of quality armor and cheap clothing and the variety of weapons gave him away as a hired hand. There were plenty around, and many deserters, if the Shinra standard boots the mercenary wore had anything to say.

After investigating the Forgotten City Vincent had made his way to Icicle Inn as planned, only to walk into what seemed to be a nest of Shinra activity.

Two SOLDIERs had been caught by some of AVALANCHE's members outside of town, and if the body at Vincent's feet was any evidence, also experimented on. Considering the number of shots it took to fell this mercenary, and the obvious signs of scientific alteration done to the man, Vincent had a pretty good idea of what it was.

He reached down to touch the marbled skin on one side, too hard to be normal. It was an early sign of mutation. Vincent combed through the clothing to find any kind of identification or information, but there wasn't much. The rest of the body was a map of scars, some from battle, an alarming number from recent surgery, and bruises. Shots to the head had seemed to be what killed him finally, which Vincent noted for future reference. It was obvious what someone had been trying to do with the mercenary.

The want for Super-soldiers never went out of style.

The body was found a couple hundred yards from the entrance of town, where there had been a fight. The local townsfolk said Turks had come, probably to free the two SOLDIERs, but were being sent back in along with some reinforcements to clear out the compound. Vincent had been mildly surprised to hear Turks had been involved in what sounded like a frontal assault. When he'd been trained it was as a stealth soldier, meant for spying and assassination rather than straightforward combat.

Frontal assaults were usually the worst way to go about a battle, in Vincent's opinion. Not only did they result in massive casualties for both sides, but also less ground was gained and too much evidence was destroyed. Whoever had led this mission was poorly trained.

Vincent swept his hair out of his face, the cold metal of his hand uncomfortable and a little unexpected, but he brushed it off and started to track the Turk expedition. They'd made no attempt to hide their trail, and the occasional corpse along it said they'd been fighting the whole way.

The remains of a Turk were visible as Vincent approached a rock wall roughly a mile and a half northeast of Icicle Inn. He liberated some ammunition and a spare gun from the body before moving on. He only intended to investigate the area and know the layout so when reinforcements arrived tomorrow he'd be ready. There was no reason to go inside the cave if SOLDIERs were doing it tomorrow. Shinra's elite would make the charge and clear the way, and then the ex-Turk could slip in unnoticed.

When he'd scouted the area, he returned back to the camp he'd set up a little ways from town, and waited for the cavalry.

At dawn the next day, Vincent waited crouched in the snow behind some of the jagged rocks that dotted the white landscape, watching the platoon prepare to head out. It appeared there was a Turk amongst them, who was giving most of the directions. It seemed he hadn't learned from his predecessor, and a frontal assault was likely in the works, given the gear the cannon fodder were wearing. Despite the snow Vincent could barely feel the cold, which he was both thankful for and perturbed by. Whatever Hojo had done to him—and his metal fist clicked a bit as it clenched—he had deserved it, but it didn't mean the man wouldn't be punished for it and everything else he'd done.

Returning to the present, Vincent counted the squad's numbers, all dressed in thick winter wear except for the captain, who was clearly either a First or Second. He was not as affected by the cold either, and was easily discernable by his spiky dark hair. Two more SOLDIERs joined them from the direction of town, and their appearances made it clear they were the two that had been rescued the day before. It seemed they couldn't have been that injured if they were back for a fight the next day. Admirable, but ultimately stupid.

The helicopter the Shinra troops arrived in took off back to Icicle Inn for refueling as the men continued to prep weapons and run over their strategy. From what he could overhear, it sounded like they planned to land around a rocky outcropping almost two miles north of the cave network, possibly going for a surprise attack. Vincent knew their chances of that were slim.

Already knowing where the cave was, Vincent set off so he could be ready for them when they arrived, his long shoes leaving strange prints in the snow. As long as the soldiers did their job he could be in and out in under an hour.

* * *

"Congratulations Tseng," Ringer said, a blonde who had the annoying habit of smiling a little too coyly over her drink at their new leader. They had just received notification from the president about the promotion. Everyone knew it was likely temporary, and Tseng did most of the fieldwork coordination anyway, so the dynamic didn't really change. It went unsaid though that no one was really sure what had happened to Veld. Reno hadn't liked the strict head that much, but he was way better than the Wutain, who would be more unbearable now than ever.

Reno wasn't the only one who snorted into his coffee (spiked with the strongest stuff in Tseng's liquor cabinet). It was everyone's lunch break, and someone had decided to throw together a party to celebrate Tseng's promotion. It was still surreal to Reno to be standing in an office environment like this. The outward face of the Turks demanded this kind of atmosphere, even if most of their work involved covert operations everywhere else.

Reno escaped the impromptu gathering before Tseng could catch sight of him and corner him, slipping into Rude's cubical down the hall where the older Turk sat diligently typing away. The cubicle almost looked empty from the sheer lack of decoration or personalization. Rude wasn't a man for outward expression, so his workspace was expectedly bare.

Rude was perhaps the oddest match for Reno's partner, but they actually got along quite well. Patient, stoic, and soft-spoken, he was Reno's foil, in Tseng's words. To Reno's limited understanding of Wutain philosophy, Rude was the yin to his yang, whatever the hell that meant. There was a reason people slept through the mandatory Wutain culture class. Rude didn't judge, never got annoyed, and seemed to, in rare glimpses, actually enjoy the redhead's humor. The man also proved to be an excellent Turk; never questioning orders, highly efficient when it came to the job, and dangerous in combat.

Dude was hella badass.

"Rude, you're missing the party, yo." Reno waved his hand in the vague direction of the break room where Tseng and most of the people in the office hoping for free food were.

The big man barely glanced at him, but Reno could see the slight movement of his eyes beneath the ever-present sunglasses.

He was getting good at reading him. Maybe. It was all in the angle of the lips (or whatever).

"Do ya' know what happened to Veld?"

Rude was silent for several moments before speaking. "…Temporary leave."

Reno leaned against the side of the cubicle; his rumpled suit in total contrast to Rude's starched one. " _Forced_ temporary leave?" Reno asked half-sarcastically half-serious, and Rude's non-response said that was most likely. It was like reading Cloud some days, except less scary. And wasn't that a strange thought? A SOLDIER cadet was scarier than a trained Turk.

Or whatever the hell Cloud said he was. The sci-fi stuff was way over Reno's head.

The redhead shook his head a little. Maybe he'd overdone the vodka a bit. Normally it wasn't his thing—rum, when he could afford it, had always been his drink of choice—but stealing from Tseng was always satisfying. Pens, paperclips, liquor, pretty much anything he could get his hands on. Why the man kept such strong stuff at work he didn't know though. Reno could only hope one day he'd catch the Wutain drunk in the office. That would be like an early birthday.

"Well, maybe we can get shipped out for a week so I don't have to 'help him move in' or whatever he'll do to rub it in my face."

Rude's telling pause (slightly different from his normal silence), indicated there was something to be said.

Deftly, despite his wide, flat fingers, Rude accessed the server and pulled up the assignment sheet that technically only the head of the Turks could access (but everyone did—this was the Turks after all). Reno leaned closer to the screen to see what Rude was doing.

"Junon, huh?"

Rude scrolled down a bit. It seemed to be some kind of patrol job, which sounded boring as hell to Reno. What caught his eye though was who was leading the expedition.

"Wait a second, wait a second, scroll up Rude."

The big man did. On the top under the direction for the mission were the captain, Tseng, and the commander of the mission, one Heidegger.

"Heidegger?" Reno groaned, throwing his head back in exaggerated annoyance.

"…"

"Ugh, that's almost as bad as Tseng. What the hell did Veld do? Kill the president's mother?"

Rude didn't say anything as Reno left in a huff. If he and Reno were lucky they'd get a post in the far corner of Junon, away from Tseng and that grating horse-laugh.

* * *

Vincent exited the underground laboratory by a side entrance, coming out on the frozen tundra, cape swirling with the gusts of wind. He took in a strong breath to clear out the sharp smell of antiseptic and chemicals. It brought to mind memories of Nibelheim and Lucrecia, and Vincent pushed them back into the box in the back of his mind, shutting the lid tight.

The lab in the cave was rudimentary, obviously a temporary base of operations. Fuhito, the scientist running the lab, had indeed been experimenting on the SOLDIERs, trying to improve his formula for "Ravens", his personal brand of superior soldiers. While the research was rather sadistic and disturbing, as was the trend with scientists, Vincent had concluded it was unrelated to Hojo. Though Fuhito had obviously modeled his work on what Hojo had done with SOLDIER, he had neither the funding nor the materials that Hojo had. Jenova was not involved it seemed.

Vincent's original intention in coming to Icicle Inn was to check out Modeoheim, an old excavation site for mako and where many scientists did experimentation. Hollander had been among their number. It was south of the town, but Vincent would have to circumnavigate around it because the SOLDIER and his troops would be returning there eventually, and it was better if they never knew he'd been around.

The journey took him most of the rest of the day. None of the beasts in this area were particularly dangerous, and many of the smarter ones avoided him once they sensed the demons in him. He wasn't quite sure how to feel about that, so he didn't think about it.

By sunset he came upon the ravine where the now abandoned town of Modeoheim still sat. There was some damage to the town above ground, caused by both materia and physical attacks. Vincent took a cursory look at the destruction, but the amount of snow and decay indicated it was not recent.

The reactor itself wasn't in great condition after years of harsh weather. Vincent was careful in the old metal structure, which eerily resembled the Nibelheim reactor the ex-Turk had navigated before. Both were some of the earliest reactors created, but Modeoheim's lab had been built into the building when it was first made, while Hojo had made his additions to Nibelheim later. The basement below the reactor was where Vincent knew the lab would be.

The place itself was a wreck, and it was clear Shinra had cleaned out most of the documents and information that had been here. The equipment, old and clunky that it was, had been left behind though, and Vincent had a feeling he would be more thorough than any crew sent to clean the place up.

He checked the equipment first, getting a feel for what had been truly abandoned when the reactor dried up, and what had been used more recently. The examination table, syringes, and empty IV bags were all more recently disturbed. The small mako shower in the corner and many of the glass tubes for dousing were coated with layers of dust, evidence they'd remained untouched for years. Whatever had occurred here had not involved any large amounts of mako.

The next thing to look for was documents, which would mean slow going. The ex-Turk was careful to check all shelves for hidden panels, loose books or pages, anything that might have been a hiding place or tucked away for safekeeping. There was no sign anyone had returned here after Hollander left, so anything he found would likely have belonged to the scientist.

Eventually Vincent's meticulousness paid off. In the pencil draw of the desk there were several papers jammed between the drawer and the back of the desk, most likely accidentally stuck there when someone went through the drawer too quickly. Vincent was careful to extract the papers without tearing them, spreading out the creased notes on the desk to look at. Hollander's handwriting was tough to decipher, but as Vincent skimmed it he knew this was what he'd been looking for.

It seemed to be notes concerning concentrated amounts of Jenova cells and theories on how they might interact with a specimen already possessing some dormant Jenova cells. The "perfect specimen" was referenced several times, along with Project G, which Vincent was familiar with from his time with the Turks. It seemed Dr. Hollander was hoping to expand upon his prized work somehow, and Hojo's research was likely part of it.

There was little hard information on the pages; most of it scientifically inclined, involving amounts for saline drips and mako exposure and numerous equations. What it meant to Vincent though was proof that Hollander was interested in pure Jenova cells, something that would only be possible to get through Hojo. The paranoid scientist undoubtedly had some in storage, probably in Midgar since any in Nibelheim were destroyed, and he would never give them to his longtime rival. The only other place for Jenova cells was Sephiroth or Jenova herself.

Cloud had related what he knew of Dr. Hollander, but his knowledge was slim. He was still in Shinra hands at the moment, but his accomplice and creation, the First Class SOLDIER Genesis, was not. If he was working with Hollander then he might have Jenova or be searching for her.

The General was the option Cloud had not mentioned, despite his knowledge concerning Sephiroth's origins. Sephiroth himself though, as Cloud made exceedingly clear, was not fully aware of the circumstances of his birth, and so only peripherally aware of the Jenova cells in him. Vincent considered briefly the chances of Sephiroth either freely giving the cells or being forced to, but discarded it. It was unlikely the General could be forced to do much, and unless the General and Hollander's First Class met on the battlefield, which would force Genesis out of hiding, Jenova was still Hollander's best bet.

The tough part now would be finding the ex-SOLDIER. Shinra had officially declared him dead, but Cloud said he returned in a massive attack on Junon. Where he was in the intervening months was a mystery though.

The best place to start, Vincent considered as he tucked the papers into an inside pocket, was in Banora Village, where Dr. Hollander had done his work on Project G. If Genesis was a product of it, then he was probably familiar with the village. As all of Shinra believed him dead, it was also unlikely he was expecting anyone to come looking for him there.

Vincent checked the rest of the room as carefully as before in case there was anything else, but anything that had been left was long gone.

To get to Banora would require a trip across the world, since the village was in the Mideel area. The port was several days trek from Icicle Inn, in the southwest, and would take him back to Costa del Sol, where he'd have to get another ship to Junon. Vincent briefly considered passing through Midgar to meet with Cloud, but his findings weren't enough to warrant the risk of being recognized in Shinra's city.

Vincent left the room after one quick glimpse over it, eyes able to see as easily in the dark as in the light. The town would be safe enough to camp in for the night, before he started for the port in the morning.

* * *

"Reporting, sir," Zack said, and he looked the part of the perfect soldier except for the stubborn lock of hair covering one eye. As was the case after some missions, there was no smile on his face.

"At ease," General Sephiroth said, and Zack immediately slouched, sliding into one of the posture chairs in the debriefing room. He normally tried to crack or joke or at least chat with Sephiroth before getting down to the gritty stuff, but this time the First just didn't feel like it. Burying Essai and Sebastian had been hard. He tried to act cheerful all the way here, but he knew Seph didn't buy it and so didn't bother. The General had been there through the entire Angeal ordeal, and he saw right through Zack's happy smile. It was a blessing no one else did yet.

"Report."

"The compound was located in a cave north of Icicle Inn. We were ambushed when we arrived, and I was separated from the others. It was AVALANCHE members mostly, with limited training, but they overwhelmed the infantryman. When I found the other men, Essai and Sebastian were gone. Whatever took them was much stronger than the people we'd been fighting." Zack pushed the lock of hair away from his face, remembering briefly the scattered bodies on the ground. Thankfully most of the men had been knocked out or incapacitated, but it had reminded him too much of what he had seen in Wutai.

Zack reiterated the events of getting into the lab itself, and finding Essai and Sebastian transformed into that scientist's devilish creations. They'd become monsters, and Zack and the Turk he'd been with had been forced to kill them. Seeing his friends go down that way was not easy.

"Describe the transformation. Any mutations or physical attributes stick out to you?"

Zack told him what he saw; down to the two SOLDIERs deaths and the graves he made for them.

"Ravens," Sephiroth said, crossing his arms and shifting slightly in his chair. "The Turks have had reports of them before. Their accelerated healing makes all but death blows useless, and they are particularly ruthless."

Zack's expression became unreadable as he stared down Sephiroth. "You said they're called _Ravens_?"

Sephiroth nodded, eyes narrowing slightly at the look on Zack's face.

"Cloud… a couple months ago Cloud told me about something called the Ravens." Zack's brow furrowed a bit, remembering the awkward conversation. Cloud had looked so…reluctant, ashamed even.

"He did?" Sephiroth's voice was flat as usual, but when Zack made eye contact he knew this disturbed his friend.

"Yeah. I was being deployed to deal with AVALANCHE. I think it was September, or maybe early October." Zack thought back, "Cloud told me to… be careful of the Ravens; that they were dangerous, strong, and a scientist in AVALANCHE had made them. I asked him where he heard of them, and he said Reno had told him." Zack paused, and his shoulders weren't so tense now. "I wouldn't be surprised if Reno has connections to AVALANCHE. They're all over the underground in Midgar."

Zack rubbed a tired hand against the back of his neck, thinking. The General knew Zack well though, and he knew the First didn't want to believe Cloud would be caught up with AVALANCHE somehow. Sephiroth wanted to believe it too, but he was far from convinced.

* * *

Reeve shuffled the pile of forms he'd finished signing into a neat pile, putting it in the outbox on his desk. Looking at the inbox still two-thirds full, Reeve could feel both his age and his job weighing on him. No matter how many forms he filled out or requests he made, his job was a passive one at best. At worst nothing more than political.

Feeling lethargic and too tired to be really annoyed at his unhappy occupation, Reeve glanced at the clock behind him: 3:14pm. He still had a little under two hours before he could leave.

Next week he'd be doing an inspection of some of the buildings by the outer walls of Midgar, but this week was all paperwork, and it was wearing the executive down. He felt tired, and the thought of looking over another form or report about rusting bolts and cracking beams made him think longingly of the couch in the lounge on the floor below.

Realizing what this meant, Reeve pushed back his chair, wincing automatically as it scrapped the wall, and stood up, deciding to head to the nice coffee machine a couple floors down and get some caffeine.

He peeked in at the office he passed by, seeing one of the poor people under him slaving over paperwork, dark circles under his eyes. He looked as happy as Reeve felt.

Down at the very end of the hall was the door to the stairs. The executive's shoes echoed nosily as he made his way down the empty stairwell. It was almost impossible to be quiet on the cheap metal. Reno's military boots always clunked painfully as he marched up and down.

Thinking of Reno, Reeve recalled that he'd been sent to Junon several days ago along with most of the Turks; canceling the meeting they'd planned this week. Heidegger was behind it. Reeve wasn't sure what was going on there exactly, it likely had to do with the cannon built there, though why the head of "Public Safety" needed so many Turks was a mystery.

Four flights of stairs later, and Reeve came out in another hallway identical to his except for the maroon carpet and the fancier lounge at the end.

He could already hear the voices of others talking, likely looking for any reason to stop working too. As he entered the room he glanced over the people gathered there, surprised at seeing the General standing by the windows. There were two young women on one of the couches indiscreetly watching the man, while a number of others Reeve didn't recognize talking not far from the coffee machine, though they too sent wary glances at the General's back.

Reeve got his cup of coffee and hesitated, wondering whether to join the pensive General by the window or sip his drink somewhere else.

In the end, the conversation between the employees on the other side of the room caught his attention.

"Can you believe it? The head of the Department of Administrative Research was fired just last week."

"Really?" Another one of them said. They were indistinguishable in their suits. "I heard he was in some kind of scandal. The President was pissed. Bet the head of Weapons Development was involved."

"Oh come on, you think she's involved with everything. You just want to sleep with her."

The conversation devolved from there, but Reeve wasn't listening anymore. He had heard about Verdot's "temporary leave", and everyone was aware something had been going on there. You didn't just kick out a Turk, not when they did the dirty work for Shinra.

Reeve glanced over at the General's profile, but couldn't tell if he'd overheard anything or if the man was even curious. His stolid face made it nearly impossible to read, so the executive took another drink of his coffee and came to a decision.

"I heard about Verdot's leave," he said slowly, approaching the still General, "Do you know if it will be permanent?" Reeve already had a fairly good idea about the circumstances concerning the head of the Turks absence, but he wanted to judge where Sephiroth was on this. Speaking with Aeris had emboldened him, and he knew Sephiroth had little love for the Shinra Corporation.

The General turned slightly to face him, a cup of tea in his hand. His gaze was heavy, and it made Reeve suddenly nervous, like he could see through him. "It seems unlikely to me."

Reeve made a noise of confirmation and took a sip of coffee, using the moment to think clearly. If he told the General what he suspected, what would be the repercussions? The man was the leader of the greater military, and one who commanded a great deal of loyalty. While Reeve was still very preliminarily considering ways of changing the company, it didn't hurt to accumulate allies—or at least people who wouldn't immediately strike you down. Aeris was already being extremely helpful, and Sephiroth could possibly from another angle.

Cupping his coffee in both hands, Reeve glanced at the window. He would have lowered his voice, but he didn't want to seem too much like his was conspiring, especially since he and the General were barely acquaintances.

"I heard a rumor," he started, trying for nonchalant, though his voice was still quieter than he meant to be. He could tell he had the General's full attention, which was intimidating, "that he may have been involved in a security leak. Bigger than the one with Lazard."

Sephiroth's expression didn't change as Reeve fought the instinctive urge to stare and try to read him. He glanced up once, making brief eye contact with those eerily cat-like irises.

"I expect Verdot will return," Sephiroth said neutrally, the low timber of voice carrying slightly to the onlookers. "He was always…diligent in his work." There was the slightest of pauses, barely noticeable, and then he moved off to rinse out his mug, acting perfectly natural.

The other employees in the room seemed to hold their breath before starting up whispered conversations while the women flashed glances at the small kitchen area. Reeve drained the rest of his coffee, feeling more awake than a shot of espresso could do.

He tossed the cup in the trashcan on his way out, pausing in the hallway as he heard his name. "Tuesti." The baritone made it obvious who was speaking.

The General was standing outside the door to the lounge. His gaze was discerning, as though he wanted to see all of Reeve's motives in that one look. Reeve wasn't sure if that was just how he felt under that stare or if the man did it deliberately.

A door down the hall opened, and Reeve nodded politely. "I'm taking the stairs, General. It was good to see you."

He turned and walked down the hall back to the stair entrance and didn't feel calmer until he turned a corner and was out of eyesight of the General. The SOLDIER made him unaccountably nervous sometimes, and he was only glad those public speaking skills saved him from stuttering. Running his hands through his hair, Reeve reflected that it had actually gone quite well. The General may or may not act, but he was informed.

While Reeve Tuesti thought about this, Sephiroth's thoughts lingered on a certain blond cadet—or rather, Third Class SOLDIER now. Tuesti's impromptu intelligence reminded Sephiroth forcibly of Zack's revelation days ago at his debriefing. Cloud had known about the Ravens when only the Turks had fought them, and he now had a friend in the Turks. His weapons knowledge and reticence when it came to his teacher, while not necessarily related to AVALANCHE, were nonetheless suspicious.

The elevator stopped on his floor, and the General exited swiftly, heading back for his office and another pile of paperwork. Zack was recovering from the burial of his two friends, and intelligence was trying to piece together what they had found at the compound in Icicle Inn. That, on top of rumors of AVALANCHE's imminent move and Veld's abrupt leave left Sephiroth with too little time to consider his own problems. The General closed the door to his office but didn't move to sit down, instead taking in the view of Midgar and the desert out the window. If he had the opportunity he might have considered a vacation. Cloud's conundrum was the biggest question in his head, followed closely by questions about his parentage, and he just didn't seem to have answers to either. This was more frustrating with Cloud, who obviously knew what Sephiroth wanted to know and refused to tell.

Closing his eyes, he took a breath and tried to organize his thoughts. As of right now, Cloud was not going anywhere and neither was information concerning his biological parents, and Veld's situation was out of his control. What he could do was ensure the rest of SOLDIER was kept up to date about the Ravens, and to sign off for the instructors for the incoming cadet class.

More settled now, Sephiroth took his seat and started in on the requisition forms for the new cadets. He'd barely made a dent in them when there was a knock on his door. Before he could call out though it swung open to admit Zack.

"Hey Seph, you think you can do me a favor?"

The First looked more like his boisterous self and less melancholy like he'd been for the days following his mission to Icicle Inn. Sephiroth set down his pen as he watched Zack flop down into the chair across from him; secretly a little pleased Zack was feeling better. Sephiroth was at a loss when it came to dealing with other's grief, and it was easier overall if Zack recovered on his own.

"I want to take Cloud out for a weekend field training. They sometimes take groups in the cadet class, but he never went, and I want him to build some experience fighting real monsters. Think you can wrangle me a couple days and a car?"

Sephiroth looked at Zack, thinking for a moment about this. "Where would you take him?"

"Aldanna Mountains. The monsters there aren't too bad, and it's good for survival practice too." Zack shrugged, and Sephiroth sensed something more. After a pause, Zack continued. "Angeal took me there too my first time out. I…I have to tell Cloud about him, and I figured that might be the best place."

Sephiroth nodded, considering something else. Other than the usual paperwork, there were no pressing missions for SOLDIER in the near future. Heidegger had taken most of the Turks to Junon, so it was likely they'd be able to handle anything he was expecting there. As long as the week remained fairly quiet, the General thought he might get a short sort of vacation after all.

"Friday, Saturday, Sunday, and Monday I can put you on survival training leave."

"That's perfect Seph!" Zack exclaimed, smiling widely. Belatedly it occurred to Sephiroth that he should ask Zack if he could go with them, considering he might be imposing on their time.

"Zackary," Sephiroth paused, unsure how to phrase this. He rarely asked for things, and this was a curious position he'd never been in before. "Your trip with Cloud…I should like to ask if I might accompany you."

Zack frowned slightly, and Sephiroth felt the strangest pang of hurt. He wasn't sure what caused it. "I know we're worried about Cloud and all, but I don't want to pressure him too much. If he doesn't want to talk to us, then I don't want to make him unless we really have to."

Sephiroth shook his head slightly. "I do not wish to accompany you because of Strife. There has been a lot of…stress here recently." Thinking about Hojo at all made said stress feel more burdensome than ever. "I have not taken a training trip in some months, and the chance to—"

"Seph, I get it." Zack was smiling now, more gently than usual. "Everyone needs to get out, we've all been feeling it. You're welcome to join us."

Whatever pain Zack's initial rejection caused evaporated. Zack spoke before he could say anything. "I don't know how much training you'll be able to get in, since we'll be sticking to stuff Cloud can deal with. Company always makes trips more fun though."

Sephiroth's lips quirked, and Zack's smiled widened in response. "There are leveled monsters at the higher elevations. I will not disturb your training."

Zack shook his head, but didn't say anything more, still smiling. "Bet Spike'll enjoy this." His smile looked devious before he took his leave.

Feeling refreshed and looking forward to the weekend, Sephiroth notified his secretary of the paperwork he'd need, and settled back to signing forms.

* * *

Cloud stood next to the old army truck, wondering exactly how much mako it took to cure motion sickness. Though memories of being sick as a dog on a ship or car were barely there, Cloud knew he'd rather not relive them.

"Throw your stuff in the back Spikey, and no reading to while away the time! I know the best songs, and this trip is going to be awesome!" Zack was more excited than Cloud had ever seen him. He ran around the truck throwing in his bags, camping gear, and their swords, jabbering the whole while. Cloud was amused by Zack's childishness, and maybe it was even a little contagious. Leaving Midgar, fighting real monsters, getting to hang out with Zack for four days, it sounded like something he'd dreamt about long ago.

"Alright!" Zack declared after several more minutes of preparing the truck. "All that's left is the big surprise." He grinned wickedly at Cloud, who immediately felt nervous. Zack's surprises were not always what he anticipated, and though they weren't necessarily _bad_ …

"Seph, you made it!"

Zack's call almost made Cloud flinch, and the blond immediately turned around to confirm that it was indeed General Sephiroth coming towards them with a duffel over one shoulder and Masamune over the other.

The General said a greeting to Zack as Cloud approached. His standing with Sephiroth was hard to understand, and the General joining them on the trip made it that much weirder.

"Cloud," Sephiroth said, nodding slightly.

"Uh, sir," Cloud responded with a salute, and Zack threw his arm around his shoulders before anything more could be said by either of them.

"C'mon Spike, loosen up. Seph's coming for a little of his own training, so we probably won't see him most of the day. Let's all drop the military bearing and go as friends, okay?"

Cloud wasn't sure that was really appropriate, or possible, but Zack's big smile belied how much he wanted for his two closest friends to relax around each other, and Cloud was determined to try. So long as Sephiroth didn't spring anything on him like during the exam, then this could work.

"Okay, put your stuff in the back, Seph, and let's mosey!"

Four hours later, any stiffness between Sephiroth and Cloud had disappeared after hours of being subjected to Zack's singing. The man had dozens of tape decks and CDs, and he knew every word to every song it seemed. While he wasn't a bad singer, Zack's constant cajoling for Sephiroth or Cloud to join in had grated on their last nerve.

For the first hour Cloud had been perfectly miserable. It seemed he didn't have enough mako not to feel the effects of carsickness, and he'd shut his eyes to try to drown out the nausea and Zack's headache-inducing singing. By the second hour the nausea had let up some, possibly because his body was adjusting, and he was able to actually look out the window and start to enjoy the trip—even if Zack realized he was feeling better and immediately asked him to sing along.

Cloud felt a tap on his shoulder, and turned around slowly to look back at the General. He was seated behind Zack at an angle so his long legs could fit more comfortably in the cramped jeep. Despite the sickness, Cloud hadn't forgotten Sephiroth sitting barely a foot behind him. Even at his most casual, the man's presence was like a beacon, and the blond felt all his nerves singing every time he heard movement behind him. It was distracting and exhilarating all at once.

Sephiroth was leaning forward, subtlety pointed at one of the tape decks between Cloud and Zack. Over Zack's rendition of "Chocobo Highway", Cloud shrugged his shoulders as though to say "what?" and when the silver-haired man pointed again, Cloud realized Sephiroth wanted the tape.

Handing the tape back to him, Cloud glanced back out of curiosity. Much to his surprise, he saw the General deftly slide the tape under the seat cushion so it disappeared from sight.

Cloud bit his lip rather than laugh or smile, and started to carefully slip more tapes and CDs back to Sephiroth at his prodding, who proceeded to hide them wherever he could. The blond forgot all about his motion sickness as they did this, enjoying such lightheartedness with _Sephiroth_ of all people.

The General's smile and amused looks reminded Cloud of why he'd gone to such lengths in the past for this man, why he still cared now. Sephiroth looked… handsome. Human. Like the person Cloud had always wished he'd known.

The thought was sobering somewhat, and he glanced back at Sephiroth again on instinct, suddenly feeling his throat constrict a bit. Nervous. Attracted. Feelings he'd been successfully pushing away every time he'd met with the man before because the mission came first—always first. They made eye contact, and Cloud quickly looked away.

The three were heading steadily south in the beat up army jeep, and were now slowly winding into the mountains. Zack had told Cloud he knew the area well, so he and Cloud would get some serious training in against a variety of beasts while Sephiroth took to the higher regions and fought something more at his level. The General hadn't said if he would join them in the evenings, but Zack's talk of campfire and s'mores made it sound as though he'd be personally offended if Sephiroth didn't.

By a little after noon Zack pulled off the main road and drove the jeep into a small clearing, parking it. "Okay, we're halfway there!"

"Halfway?" Cloud groaned, before blushing a bit at Sephiroth's quiet chuckle.

"Yup Spike," Zack said, reaching to ruffle his hair and laughing as Cloud ducked out of reach. "We're hiking from here. There's an awesome camp spot my mentor always took me to. The sunrises are amazing, and a two mile climb from camp lands you a better view of the ocean than money can buy."

All three of them hopped out of the car and began unloading. Zack took care of the buster swords, letting Cloud empty the backseat of candy wrappers courtesy of Zack's sweet tooth. Masamune was so long the hilt had actually been between the two front seats, the tip of the blade in the farthest corner of the vehicle. Sephiroth pulled it out of the car carefully, the intricately designed sheath probably made of something incredibly expensive. He strapped it on his back at an angle, the blade almost as tall as he was. Zack similarly swung Galatine over his back, buckling it tight, then pulled the camping gear over it.

"How will you use the sword with the backpack on?" Cloud asked as he approached Zack from the side, the older SOLDIER handing him his buster sword as he spoke.

"Oh, you're the only one who's fighting Cloud," Zack said laughing, nodding over to Sephiroth who also wouldn't be able to draw his sword without dropping his gear. "You'll be taking care of anything we run into, and Seph and I are back up. I think between the three of us and a little materia we won't run into anything too strong." Zack winked as they finished unloading and locked up the car. The camouflage paintjob and the remoteness of their position meant it would be pretty safe until Monday morning when they drove back.

The trek was lighthearted, despite Cloud having to fake ignorance when it came to dealing with certain creatures. Zack explained the basics of attacking flying creatures, the faster kinds of monsters, and elementals, occasionally borrowing his sword to demonstrate. Sephiroth hung back and watched, but Cloud didn't feel so clinically analyzed as he had before under the General's scrutiny.

The four-hour hike was treacherous at points, and it was clear wherever they were going would be nearly inaccessible to anyone but a SOLDIER. Several of the rocky hillsides and narrow passes would have been quite difficult for a civilian, but with enhancements were fairly simple. At one point Cloud had even had to hand the gear and sword he'd been carrying over to Sephiroth as Zack demonstrated the necessary acrobatics to climb up a sheer rock face when the path winding through it became too narrow.

Despite being tired and dirty from having to fight every creature big and small from the car to the clearing, Cloud was happy. Zack was laughing as he recalled something that had happened at the campsite in a previous year, and Sephiroth had gone off to scout the area after a quick compliment on Cloud's performance.

That night Zack insisting on sharing stories around the fire he'd taught Cloud to build without fire materia. While Zack's were always funny, and Sephiroth often had amusing anecdotes to share, Cloud found himself at a loss. He couldn't share any of his travels from AVALANCHE since those were places he couldn't have been to before, and post-Meteor there was very little to tell that was positive. His own childhood and teenage years were such a blur nothing really stood out.

Zack laughed, patting Cloud on the shoulder when the blond said he couldn't think of anything to share. "C'mon Cloud, surely you can think of something. Didn't you and Reno do anything fun as cadets? Or what about the trip to Midgar from your home, anything interesting happen then?"

Cloud just shook his head, "You already know all the good stories about Reno," he said. Zack said something in response, but Cloud's eyes had flickered over to Sephiroth. The flames illuminated Sephiroth's face, making it look eerily like that moment in the fire when he'd walk away from the burning Nibelheim. That image was cemented in Cloud's memory, and he was momentarily disoriented as double vision overtook him. He hadn't had that since he'd first arrived.

"Hey Cloud, you with me?" Zack's hand waved in front of his face, and Sephiroth's eyes were slightly narrowed.

"Uh, sorry." Cloud murmured.

"Uh huh," Zack said slowly. "Well, why don't you tell us why you wanted to join Shinra? I don't think you ever told me that."

Cloud nodded, looking away from both men. He knew the real reason he'd originally wanted to join Shinra—he was staring at him from across the fire, his green eyes burning him with his gaze. It made him think of being a little boy, seeing the headlines of General Sephiroth's triumphs during the war, his hero worship that followed him all the way through Shinra to… Nibelheim.

Cloud licked his lips, trying to think of another answer that wasn't a lie. "I… I wanted to get out of Nibelheim. It's a small town."

"Yeah, same here. Gongaga was tiny and like, two days drive from anywhere."

"What do most men in Nibelheim do for a living?" Sephiroth asked, looking slightly curious.

"Lumberjacking mostly. Along with some hunting," Cloud said, looking back over at Sephiroth.

"You left because you didn't want to be a lumberjack and the military was the only way?" Zack asked biting into a corndog he'd been cooking over the fire. Zack by far ate the most out of the three of them, since he was still snacking even after dinner.

"That's mostly it," Cloud said evasively, but he already knew he'd have to give Zack something more at his look. "I was… bullied too."

"The hair right? Man, with the way my hair sticks up I used to get teased about it too," Zack said comfortingly, putting his arm around Cloud and offering him a bite of his corndog. Zack was only half-right. Cloud had been bullied a bit when he was young, but it had been far worse after he was blamed for what happened with Tifa and the bridge.

"I have never been teased, but…" Sephiroth said softly, "Most people may have been too afraid to."

Zack sighed softly but didn't say anything, but Cloud tentatively spoke up. "Have people always…?"

Sephiroth shifted slightly, and the creak of his leather pants was audible. It made Cloud swallow slightly, awkwardness briefly forgotten as he remembered just how closefitting those pants were.

"For the most part. I have always… stuck out, I suppose."

Though Cloud couldn't tell him, he knew the feeling. After defeating Sephiroth and the remnants, he'd been so famous it had been hard to escape people who recognized him. He had become isolated in a crowd, people parting for him and whispering about him, and it had been frustrating and sad. At least there he'd had AVALANCHE and the children, but here…

All Sephiroth really had here was Zack and… and maybe him.

"After… Hojo and the experiments, when everyone found out…" Cloud said softly.

Zack's arm hugged him a little tighter, and Sephiroth stared at him with an unreadable look on his face.

"They treated me as… delicate. Like I'd fall apart. Or others like I might be… dangerous." It was hard to say it, but it was true. For a while there AVALANCHE hadn't been sure what to think. He remembered the room on the _Highwind_ , admitting that he remembered he _wasn't_ a SOLDIER, that he'd been a failed experiment; that he wasn't half the man he claimed he was. He remembered their shocked and dismayed expressions, how shaken the trust was there.

The Turks though, especially Reno, had acted in moments like he was unstable, like he'd lose it the way Sephiroth had. That hurt, especially since they'd been _right_. Sephiroth wouldn't have gotten the Black Materia otherwise.

Zack shook his shoulder a bit, jarring him from the memory. "Hey, what's done is done. Let's find a spot where you can see the moon and stars really clearly. Bet it's been awhile since you've seen those, country boy."

The three found themselves by the edge of a gorge, where the tree line fell back and the sky was open to them. Zack's face was calm as he looked up, thoughts a million miles away.

The blond looked over at Sephiroth on his other side, the General's face contemplative. He looked beautiful in the evening light, and it reminded Cloud all over again why he… why _this_ man.

Cloud looked away from Sephiroth and back to the night sky, recalling infinite nights of camping with AVALANCHE, standing at the cliff where Zack had fallen, the reflection of these same stars in the pool of water where he'd laid Aeris to rest.

_Thank you for sending me here and letting me fix this._

* * *

Cloud was awake at dawn out of habit and because without a tent the morning light was strong. Sephiroth was already up and rewrapping the hilt of Masamune. He glanced over at Cloud with a slight smile on his lips, which sent a jolt through Cloud that reminded him of why being a teenager was a pain. Flushing without meaning to and infinitely thankful for the sleeping bag to hide the unwitting tent in his pants he'd woken with, he was thankful Zack blocked Sephiroth's gaze by crouching down to offer him breakfast.

"Sausage this morning, and it's straight from the grocer. No Shinra food here." Zack smiled brightly—too brightly for dawn by most people's standards—and messed Cloud's hair up that was no doubt sticking up more than usual.

"I will be heading out," Sephiroth announced, pocketing a couple things but otherwise only taking his sword and a handful of materia. "I will try to be back before dark."

"Alright, see you Seph," Zack called, while moving off to scrounge for socks in one of the backpacks.

Cloud nodded at him, rubbing one eye and missing Sephiroth's amused look. The blond had no idea how cute he looked in the morning.

Half an hour after breakfast, Zack and Cloud packed up the odds and ends of camp and set out for a day of fighting. Zack jabbered on excitedly about some of the interesting monsters they'd likely see, and the varying terrains located nearby.

"I would take you out to the desert Cloud, but there can be some really nasty shit out there. In some of the high dunes, you can run into these sand worms that are as big as a house and can take several SOLDIERs to kill. They'll even swallow you whole and spit you back out, all covered in putrid smelling gunk!"

Zack regaled Cloud with tales of some of the creatures he'd fought, prodding Cloud for descriptions of Mt. Nibel dragons and wolves.

The day would probably be ranked as one of Cloud's best. He and Zack ate lunch overlooking a lake from the top of a hill, chatting about anything and everything that came to mind. Zack enjoyed showing off some of his flashier moves to Cloud and creative tricks for dealing with just about anything that came their way.

The way back up the mountainside to camp later that afternoon was quieter, since the ground could be quite steep and both SOLDIERs had to work harder and still deal with enemies occasionally attacking them.

When they did finally reach the campsite, Zack flopped down in a heap on his sleeping bag, grinning widely at the blond. Cloud sank down more slowly, feeling pleasantly worn out. He felt loose and tired, and he smiled slightly at Zack, who only grinned back more broadly.

"I figured we'd save hunting for a longer trip, and somewhere with better options than these frigid mountains. Beef stew sound good?"

Cloud nodded, glancing up to see the sun edging behind the trees of the clearing. Sephiroth should be back soon. His chest felt a little warmer, and he couldn't help thinking about how different Sephiroth could be. While at Shinra he was mainly the imposing General, but he'd had moments where he'd shown Cloud another side of him. Telling him about Masamune, in fact that entire training session, and… that first incident at the candy machine. When he'd given Cloud the candy bar.

Cloud didn't realize he'd zoned out thinking about those brief half-smiles until Zack threw an onion at him. "Hey Cloud, who ya thinkin' about?" Zack teased, laughing at Cloud's sudden blush.

"No one," Cloud said immediately, taking the knife handed to him to cut up the onion.

"Suuuure," Zack said, winking at him just as Sephiroth entered the clearing, looking almost exactly the same as he had that morning, like he hadn't been tromping through the woods all day.

"Hey Seph, you beat up anything cool?" Zack asked, poking the fire some to build up the flames.

"There were a number of Rapps at the higher altitudes."

"Oh, those suckers pack a mean punch."

At Cloud's confused look, admittedly because he had a feeling he'd fought one before but couldn't quite remember what it was, Sephiroth clarified. "A Rapps is a small type of flying dragon found in this area. They're most known for their destructive Aero attacks they create with their wings."

Cloud nodded, throwing in the rest of the onion he was cutting up as Sephiroth took a seat adjacent to him and set down his blade. The group made small talk as they waited for dinner to cook, Zack boasting about the monsters they'd gotten today, and a variety of water-based beasts he spotted that he wanted Cloud to take on tomorrow.

Dinner was followed by Zack's insistence on having s'mores, so the three SOLDIERs went scavenging for appropriate sticks to spear their marshmallows. Zack set the first one of his on fire, and then accidentally dropped the second one in the fire. Sephiroth told Cloud Zack routinely went through about three marshmallows per s'more he made, much to Cloud's amusement.

Sephiroth's came out perfectly each time, while Cloud's first was undercooked and refused to squish under the graham cracker, ruining the first s'more when it all fell to the round in the struggle, and the second came out blackened and overcooked. The last time the blond had made s'mores was with Yuffie, and he was fairly sure he hadn't gotten to even finish cooking his marshmallow because she'd stolen some of his materia while he'd been focused on it.

While Zack informed Cloud that he was proud his apprentice seemed to have a similar bad luck streak with marshmallow cooking, Sephiroth rolled his eyes and stuck two marshmallows on his stick.

"Hey, no one likes a show off," Zack said, pointedly looking at the even browning on both of Sephiroth's marshmallows. His own was black on one side, but otherwise okay for now. Cloud's third attempt was cooking very slowly on the outside of the fire, since he was hesitant to ruin another.

Sephiroth didn't respond to the accusation, but when he'd sufficiently cooked the two marshmallows on his stick, he took Cloud's plate with chocolate and graham cracker and skillfully slid the first marshmallow off the stick and in between the chocolate and cracker.

"You should be able to eat at least one s'more before you and Zack finish the whole bag," Sephiroth told Cloud as he handed the wide-eyed blond his plate, feeling his stomach do a funny flip at the happy curl of Cloud's lips. He realized his eyes were focused there a bit too long when the fire snapped particularly loudly, drawing Sephiroth's attention back to his cooling marshmallow still speared on his stick. Zack's amused stare from the other side of the fire he completely ignored.

The rest of the night was peaceful for Cloud. After Sephiroth's impromptu gift of a s'more—and it tasted better than any other that night—they talked more, though not about anything serious. Eventually they all settled down to sleep, and if Cloud craned his neck he could see both SOLDIERs while still curled up in his sleeping bag. Zack's arms were splayed wide, as though the cool evening air didn't bother him one bit, his face relaxed in sleep. Sephiroth's face was turned away from Cloud, but the bright silver hair held back in a long ponytail was almost iridescent in the moonlight. Cloud fell asleep hoping tomorrow would be like today.

The next day Cloud rolled awake around the same time as Zack, who's bed head was possibly worse than Cloud's. Sephiroth was again awake before either of them, but he didn't seem to have beaten them by much. Cloud glanced over at the older man, only to catch sight of smooth pectorals and defined abs as the General pulled on his overcoat and fastened it.

Cloud's mouth went dry, and he wasn't quite able to pull his eyes away before Sephiroth's flashed to his, Cloud's eyes caught wide. Zack yawned loudly, and Cloud sharply looked away, heart pounding.

Sephiroth left again for a different part of the mountains, while Cloud and Zack cleared up camp and headed for the lake so Zack could show Cloud the finer points of beating up sea creatures.

"So, you see all those monsters prowling at the water's edge?" Zack pointed down towards the side of the lake where a number of creatures were. "Now, they'll escape into the water after you take out a few, so I brought this." Zack produced from his pocket a green materia and handed it to Cloud. "Tell me what level it is."

Cloud took the materia and rolled it in his palm, looking at the interconnected web of frozen mako that made up the inside. "Bolt2 is the highest."

"Good. So once those monsters start diving back into the water, I want you to hit them with a jolt of electricity. It'll be good for your aim and to work your MP arm a little. I know you're not a big materia user, but it's better not to ignore the skill."

Cloud nodded, and took a breath. He had been almost avoiding materia since he'd discovered his spontaneous ability with it, and the following sessions of trying to learn some control. As useful as the magical boost was in a dire situation, he didn't want anyone to realize how much power he could wield with a materia. SOLDIER had few genuine mages, since those who joined the military generally wanted to fight with a sword or gun, so anyone with his power in magic would be highly valued. It would also be of great interest to a number of people why his magic was so powerful, which was something he wanted to avoid.

The very last thing he wanted to be was an experiment, again.

"Okay Spike, head on down there. I'm right behind you."

The first encounters weren't too difficult, and Cloud was able to take them down easily. One of the larger flying fish though was a pain with its evasive ability, so Zack told him to blast it with the materia.

Cloud raised his sword and activated the Lightening materia in it, calling out a little bit of the energy to hit the fish. The blast was bright, lighting up the whole area, and he managed to KO the monster in one hit.

"Nice Cloud!" Zack yelled, thumping him on the back. "Either that thing was more lightening-weak than we thought, or you hit him real good."

The fights progressed like that until lunchtime rolled around. "How's your MP?" Zack asked as he led Cloud around to a large rock pointed out into the lake. Zack casually cleared away some of the monsters nearby and pulled out the sandwiches Cloud had put together this morning.

"It's okay," Cloud said, accepting the outstretched Ether even though he didn't really need it. He'd only been using Bolt1 for those hits, even if Zack didn't know that.

Zack was quieter after that, munching on his overstuffed sandwich—he'd insisted on having as much as Cloud could fit between the bread—and looking out at the water. It was a little cool to be in the mountains now, but the SOLDIER First didn't really feel it. Cloud had been sure to bring layers; since he knew without enough mako enhancements he'd get colder much faster. The area around Midgar was generally more temperate than the rest of the continents, and these mountains weren't high enough to even have snow on them this time of the year.

"Hey, Cloud," Zack said, and the blond looked up at him from where he was staring down at the water.

"Yeah Zack?"

"There's… something I should probably tell you."

Zack's serious face immediately made Cloud worried. His first thought was, silly enough, that Zack didn't want to train him anymore. His stomach twisting with anxiousness at what the First could possibly say, and Cloud put down the sandwich to give Zack his full attention.

"My mentor's name was Angeal," Zack said, sounding worn. Cloud's eyes were wide as he realized Zack was telling him the story of what happened to Angeal. The blond knew bits and pieces, but he'd never really heard the whole thing, and hadn't expected to.

"He was honorable and fair, and a real role model for all the new SOLDIERs. This was his sword," Zack said, indicating the buster sword in his hand. Cloud looked down at it, remembering all the travels he'd done with it. He'd known in some way that the sword had been passed down to Zack, but he may have confused the feelings when Zack had handed it to him just before he had passed away.

Zack looked up at Cloud then, and there was some expression on his face Cloud didn't recognize. "I know I said this was supposed to be a relaxing trip. No inquiries, no questions." Zack rubbed a hand over his head, and Cloud knew the man was having trouble with this conversation.

"You don't have to tell me, Zack," Cloud said softly. He wanted to reach out and touch the First, but wasn't sure it that was right.

"No Cloud, I- I _know_."

The blond froze. He had no idea what Zack was referring to, but if this serious turn of conversation was any indication, it probably wasn't good.

"He was your teacher too, wasn't he? Angeal?" Zack was really looking at Cloud now, searching his face for the answer. Cloud almost stopped breathing, caught between relief that Zack was mistaken and dread because this seriously complicated things.

"I-"

"Let me get this out, okay? Angeal he…part of the reason he was such a strong SOLDIER was because of something this scientist did to him when he was born. You know Shinra," Zack said weakly, not cracking a smile.

"He was 'deteriorating', he said, and well, he thought himself a monster. And I…I couldn't make him see that he wasn't." Zack shook his head, and Cloud again wasn't sure to reach out to him or wait.

"It was in Modeoheim. Angeal asked me to…to destroy anything that caused suffering. And he said that included him. I couldn't make him see reason, and I think he just wanted it to end."

Zack sounded hurt and vulnerable, a side of the SOLDIER Cloud had never seen before. He'd always been so brave for Cloud, so boisterous no matter what was happened. It was hard to see him this way.

"I killed him," Zack said softly. "It was what he wanted, even though I wish it wasn't. That's when he gave me this," lifting the sword in his hand slightly, "and told me to protect my honor." Zack smiled slightly, full of nostalgia. "He was always going on about honor."

Cloud looked down, not sure what to say. He wasn't sure what was appropriate or what kind of response he expected.

The silence was a short lull, before Zack gently nudged him, his face full of remorse. "I know he was your teacher too, probably for a short time, but I'm sorry."

Some pragmatic, even cold part of Cloud, said to go along with the story, to let Zack and probably Sephiroth too, believe Angeal had been his teacher. It would cover his tracks when it came to training after all. The more sensitive side of Cloud, the one that was winning out more and more, balked at the idea though.

"Zack." Cloud said softly, awkwardly touching his arm. "Angeal wasn't my teacher. I…I never knew him."

Zack's expression didn't change for a second, most likely out of surprise, before looking almost sympathetic. "Cloud, if you feel like you have to lie, I get it. Angeal was wanted by Shinra. We were hunting him down. But he's gone. You don't have to protect him anymore, and his memory isn't tainted. Sephiroth and I both know Angeal was a good man."

"I'm not lying, Zack," Cloud said earnestly. He didn't really know why, but he didn't want his teacher to be known as anyone other than Zack. He'd taken such pride for _years_ that he'd known Zack, that to Zack he had been special. He didn't want that taken away. "Someone else was my teacher. Someone else… My teacher was very special to me. He- He was like Angeal was to you, I'm sure. I didn't get that long with him, but… it wasn't Angeal, Zack. I promise you that."

The First took in Cloud's grave face, and he already knew the blond was being perfectly honest. Zack rubbed his hands down his face and started to laugh. Cloud was surprised at the turn.

"Look at us, Cloud," Zack said shaking his head. "Seph and I were _convinced_ it had to be him, and I spent all morning preparing to deal with yelling or crying. And it was someone else." Zack's laugh didn't sound so humorous anymore, if anything it was almost cynical. "Why so many secrets, Cloud? Can you tell me at least that?"

The blond looked down helplessly at his half-eaten sandwich. He didn't know what to tell Zack. _I'm from an alternate future where you're dead, Sephiroth went insane, and everything you knew and loved has pretty much been destroyed? And I'm here to reverse that by destroying the threat before you even know it's one so you can live on in peace?_

"Zack… I don't like to keep secrets." Cloud reached over and grabbed Zack's arm before he could think the action through. Something told him to anchor himself to Zack, to not let his best friend let go. "If I told you, everything might change." Zack looked like he wanted to say something, but Cloud cut him off quickly. "This is something I have to deal with myself. If you or Sephiroth get involved… it might turn out bad. Really bad. Worse than before even."

"Before?" Zack interrupted.

"So please," Cloud said, looking straight into Zack's eyes. "Please let me do this myself. Maybe when it's done I can tell you."

"Cloud," Zack said, grabbing Cloud's other arm so they were holding each other steady. He wasn't laughing anymore. "You need to promise me something too. You need to promise that if you need help—with _anything_ —no matter how crazy or illegal it is, if you need help, you ask Seph or me. That's what friends are for, and whatever you're talking about, I don't want it to turn out bad for you either."

Zack's face was so stern that Cloud knew he couldn't walk away without promising him this. He had no intention of taking Zack up on it, but he had to make the promise.

"I know that look," said Zack, still perfectly serious, "You have to know how to ask for help when you need it, Cloud. You can't do everything alone. Think of Seph and I as your back up, your _friends_. We'd cross the whole world for you if you needed us to."

Cloud stared into Zack's mako bright eyes. He would go to the ends of the Planet for Cloud, just like AVALANCHE had for him.

Just like Cloud had for Sephiroth.

"Okay, Zack," Cloud murmured, his chest tight with emotion for Zack. "I promise if I need help—"

"With anything," Zack interrupted.

"With anything," Cloud repeated dutifully, "I'll ask you or Sephiroth."

"Good," Zack said, letting go of Cloud's arms and standing up. He felt almost cramped he'd been sitting so tense for so long. Cloud followed suit, brushing off his pants and glancing down at his abandoned sandwich. Zack grabbed Cloud before the blond could move and pulled him into a hug.

"Sorry Spike, just can't help myself," he said, pulling back. "Now let's go kill something."

Cloud hid a smile as he tossed the remains of his lunch into the lake and picked his sword up, staring at Zack like it was the first time he'd seen him coming back again. "Let's mosey."

* * *

They returned to the campsite that evening to leftover stew and more stories. Sephiroth was in high spirits, since he'd run into a rare bird that had given him a run for his money. Zack didn't mention what happened during lunch, which Cloud was infinitely glad he didn't have to repeat. Zack had said he would tell Sephiroth, but would respect Cloud's wish not to bring it up twice in a day.

They had more s'mores that night, and Sephiroth helped Cloud find the perfect place in the fire to cook his marshmallows while Zack complained bitterly that no one was helping him make perfect s'mores. In the end Sephiroth gave him one of his perfect marshmallows to, in his words, "make the puppy stop whining", which Zack was then obliged to explain where the nickname "Puppy" came from.

Cloud enjoyed hearing about Angeal, and lamented that he'd never known the man from Zack's descriptions. It seemed he'd been a friend of Sephiroth's as well, and both spoke highly of him.

The next morning everyone woke more slowly because they were heading back to Shinra—and showers, as Zack gleefully reminded them. With the chill winter wind and all the layers they were wearing (or rather, Cloud was, because neither Sephiroth nor Zack really needed them) there hadn't really been any need to bathe on such a short trip, but Cloud too was looking forward to a hot shower.

They packed up the gear, broke camp, and started the long hike back down to the jeep. Zack took point since he wanted to hack and slash at some things, and Sephiroth took the rear. Cloud in the middle enjoyed watching Zack in action, and due to his attention elsewhere didn't notice Sephiroth's eyes on him the whole time.

The General had enjoyed the break from work and the satisfying thrill of fighting monsters. Zack's company had been tempered with Cloud there, who even now continued to hold Sephiroth's eye. Sephiroth had been a little embarrassed when he'd been caught watching Cloud twice by Zack, who seemed to find it more amusing than anything else. He had a feeling when Zack had signaled he had something to tell him back at Shinra, he would be teased about Strife too.

In the mornings Cloud's hair stuck up every which way. His resemblance to a chocobo that Zack had always joked about was more obvious. The way his shirt rode up as he wiggled out of the sleeping bag had drawn Sephiroth's eye more than once, and Zack's waggling eyebrows hadn't helped.

The look in Cloud's eyes that morning when he'd caught his gaze had been familiar to Sephiroth, and a pleasant surprise if he were totally honest. He had not really given much thought to any reciprocal attraction, but the young SOLDIER was of legal age, and with mako injections…

As they walked the General caught himself twice with eyes straying to Cloud's overall form. While combat pants and standard Third Class jackets were hardly flattering, Sephiroth had gotten glimpses of the lean muscle underneath. Because of Cloud's focus on the buster sword and his smaller stature, he'd probably become more broad-shouldered and slightly bulkier in built. It was a nice counterpoise to Sephiroth's tall and lithe musculature that relied more on speed than raw strength. The height difference would also make battle more interesting, and perhaps in other areas…

Sephiroth cut the thought off and deliberately tuned his senses to the noise of the forest instead of Cloud's back as he walked.

The rest of the hike wasn't too difficult, though downhill walking was always less fun than uphill and much harder on the knees. When they did make it back to the car, Cloud was glad for the chance to rest, even though he realized as Zack started up the car, that he'd likely have motion sickness again.

Luckily for Cloud, the first hour was mostly spent with Zack complaining about the lack of variety of music, to which Sephiroth played perfectly innocent, and Cloud closed his eyes and tried to quell the vague feelings of nausea. By the time they were out in the flat desert, Cloud was feeling a little better, Zack was trying to find anything to listen to on the radio, and Sephiroth was staring out the window. When Cloud glanced back at him, the General turned, one side of his mouth curving up a bit, which Cloud tentatively returned before turning back quickly.

Zack finally getting a Midgar rock station heralded the last hour of the trip. The First proceeded to drum along with the songs while Sephiroth dozed in the back and Cloud stared out at the vast wilderness, remembering his home he'd built out here.

"We made it!" Zack called as he turned in to Shinra's military parking garage. Cloud's carsickness had returned with all the twists and turns Zack had to make in the city, so he was more than happy to get out of the jeep as quickly as he could. Sephiroth and Zack mainly unpacked while Cloud got his bearings, and then the three trooped towards the main complex. Zack offered to take everything back to the quartermaster, so he broke off from Cloud and Sephiroth to drop the stuff off. The First's apartments and the Seconds and Thirds housing were in the same direction, so Sephiroth and Cloud headed over together.

"You have improved quite a bit this weekend," Sephiroth said.

"Thanks. It was nice to have you with us," Cloud murmured, stumbling over his words slightly.

Sephiroth didn't fully smile, but the ends of his lips quirked up slightly. "I enjoyed it. If things are not too busy, you should have dinner with Zack and I."

Cloud glanced up at his superior officer, surprised by the offer. "Uh, that'd be nice. Sir."

Sephiroth nodded, offering a goodbye as his split off for the First's apartments. Cloud paused in his stride feeling that mixture of nervousness and attraction all over again as he watched him go, eyes unintentionally lingering on the tight leather pants. Sephiroth wanted to have dinner with him and Zack. As friends. Cloud bit his lip to hide the smile, and headed back to his room for a nice, long hot shower.


	33. An Uneven Balancing Act

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cloud is torn, but he may get something big to focus on soon thanks to Reno in Junon and Vincent heading his way after an encounter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For those of you waiting for a new chapter, it's been a long time. A looooooooooooong time. Let me try to refresh your memory a bit on recent events in GD: 1) Cloud time traveled. 2) Reno and Vincent both know. Reno is skeptical but willing to help. Vincent has already investigated Icicle Inn and Modeoheim for signs of Jenova and two SOLDIER Firsts are dead there. 3) We've met the three remnants in Nibelheim with Cloud's mother. It's still a mystery what happened to her. 4) What happened to Genesis? Dan met him during the exam and he found the destroyed reactor. What about Dan? Both are mysteries. 5) Zack and Sephiroth know Cloud wasn't trained by Angeal, but then by who? Both are still very suspicious. 6) Cloud's first mako injection didn't go well. The hallucinations have further increased Zack and Sephiroth's suspicions. It's only a matter of time until they reach the breaking point. 7) Cloud knows Lazard has left Shinra early. Ripple effects in the timeline are evident. 8) Sephiroth knows Hojo is not his biological father. 9) Reeve has secretly been meeting with Aeris. 10) Most important perhaps: Cloud destroyed the Mt. Nibel reactor and the Shinra Mansion but Jenova wasn't there. Cue the music. Dun dun dun.
> 
> I'm trying to slip back into FFVII fandom (if you come back Birddi let me know!) and Tumblr has been a big help. So if you blog about FFVII or want to see updates on my progress or just want to bother me to write, which is extremely helpful, you can find info about my blog on my profile. I hope this chapter is up to the old quality given that it's been… a really long time.

Cloud dreamed.

Zack's hair was a little longer than now, the strands dangling in front of his face swaying with the motion of the pick-up truck. There was the faint yellow of the old paintjob on the edges of his vision and the true-blue sky, but all Cloud could see was Zack, looking off into the distance, a half-smile on his face, arm thrown over the edge of the truck.

Then the dream cuts and distorts and when it refocuses Zack's position has changed slightly and he's looking straight at Cloud. "We're friends right? M-… Cloud, that's what you an' me are gonna be." The words blur, and Cloud can barely make out what Zack is saying. "Understand Cloud?"

The images fade before Cloud can.

A scratching sound starts, but Cloud can't tell where it's coming from. The air suddenly becomes too thick and Cloud thrashes, but he's struggling to even move, trying to come up for air. There's nothing to hold on to, and his hands scrabble at the glass in front of him as he recognizes this claustrophobia. He knows exactly where he is and the fear becomes unbearable when his eyes open and all he sees is green.

* * *

Cloud Strife sat hunched over his breakfast Tuesday morning, feeling sick and angry. It had been awhile since he'd dreamed so vividly, and it left a sour taste in his mouth. All the good feelings leftover from the training trip to the Aldanna Mountains with Zack and Sephiroth had vanished overnight. Dreaming of the tanks, the desperation as he and Zack floated in pure mako, the nauseating terror… it was a reminder of why he was here, what he had gone through, and who he once was.

He had been a warrior. A fighter. He always did what he thought was best for the people he wanted to protect, the people he cared about. Being in his own past though and reliving these memories had caused him to go astray, to lose himself in what he had long given up ever having. He'd lost that edge he'd always had after Nibelheim.

_Distracted from the mission_ , a little voice in his head said. He was… emotionally attached to Zack and Sephiroth on an entirely different level than anyone else—not even the members of AVALANCHE could quite compare. He was constantly thinking about the two SOLDIERs, worrying over how much they knew about him, how much his actions affected them. What it would do to them if they found out the truth.

He still felt it was for the better if they never knew, but he'd realized in the grey dawn when he'd woken, panting and sweating with that feverish burn of mako all over his skin, that he was almost obsessed with hiding it. Every day he spent with them only made it more stressful to keep the secret. He'd told himself early on, just days after getting here, that even if Zack and Sephiroth never knew him or hated him or never spoke to him again, he would do what he had to: destroy Jenova and Hojo before it could destroy them.

Cloud knew where he'd gone wrong. He'd let his emotions get the better of him, something he'd tried his hardest not to let happen before. Even with Aeris he'd stayed on mission. He hadn't let the grief, the anger, the helplessness of what happened to her stop him—he'd channeled it. But here, he let the joy of being with Zack, making SOLDIER and even tentatively befriending Sephiroth overwhelm his better sensibilities. And now, four months in he had nothing to show for it except the knowledge that Jenova was AWOL and a highly suspicious SOLDIER General and Lieutenant General on his back.

Last night's nightmare had reminded him in a startling way of darker days, of all that hung in the balance. Zack's confession after his first mako injection that Cloud had scared him had initially shamed the blond, made him regret hurting his friend. But that person, the one who had been ruthless in a fight, the one who couldn't let emotion weaken him, was the one who survived, and the one who would save Zack from a future Cloud had seen.

Cloud was chewing slowly on his cereal as he ruminated on what had happened in the past four months and what he still needed to do when the new PHS in his pocket started to ring. He jerked and stabbed his fork into his sausage before he realized it was just the phone. All the new Thirds had been given them this morning in anticipation of them joining their squadrons. He didn't even know how own number yet, how did anyone else?

"I know you're up, Cloud," said Reno in a surly voice on the other side when he answered the call.

"How do you have my number?"

"The hell else am I gonna do on patrol?" Reno snapped. There was no time difference between Midgar and Junon, and yet Reno was already bored enough to go hacking into Shinra files? Probably while using a computer he wasn't allowed?

"Is there anything happening in Junon?" Cloud asked, mentally reviewing any details he could recall from around this time. The attack should be soon, but it was up in the air when, and there were no guarantees. Time travel made everything he knew would happen iffy.

"No." Reno said flatly. "But can you believe we're still doing paperwork out here?" Reno asked rhetorically, uncaring if Cloud was even listening, "Tseng made me make fifty copies of the T-3489-A form yesterday. And they only have one damn copy machine out here and _of course_ it was broken, so I had to push the button to do it fifty times because it refused to do multiples."

Cloud could just make out the sound of Reno pacing, but every time the redhead started on another rant about Tseng Cloud's attention vanished. Instead the blond stared hard into his soggy cereal trying to think of where Lazard might go since the scientist was still locked up. Would he join up with Genesis? Would they attempt to free Hollander, or was Lazard more interested in Zack? Why had he been interested in Zack?

"…And then I brought them all back to him an hour later, and the man takes one look and goes 'Reno, these are the T-3489-A forms. I said to make fifty copies of the _T-3498-B_ forms.' T-3498-B this asshole!" Reno kicked something and immediately grunted in pain.

"Shut up, Rude!" he snapped at his silent partner. Cloud was still wondering if Zack knew Lazard through Angeal and if there was some connection there he might be able to learn about. "That utter bastard," Reno continued on fiercely, "I had to get up at six this morning just to find the damn form and make them all."

Reno continued to mutter vitriol, as Cloud started to stand up to leave for his first meeting with his platoon, thinking about getting a spare PHS for Vincent the next time he saw him. The ex-Turk might know places to look for a missing SOLDIER director…

"Oh, hey Cloud," Reno said, recovering from his Tseng-related fit, "I was just going through results from the exam—you know, see what else was going on. Thought you might want to know that Dan never came in. His record says 'MIA: possible defection'."

Cloud's hands stiffened on the tray, thoughts of Zack and Lazard wiped away in an instant. His mind had strayed to the other cadet several times since becoming a SOLDIER, but he had been so busy with Zack, Sephiroth and the new training, not to mention preoccupied with the mako examinations, that he had just assumed Dan had failed and been shuffled into the regular army. If Dan hadn't come in and no one had found him, then either something had gotten him in the forest or…

"He probably just took the wrong path and ended up in Corel or something," Reno said, sounding deceptively casual. Cloud could tell that Reno wasn't being offhand about this however, and that some part of the boy had grown to like Dan. Dan's disappearance was disconcerting to him. Both of them knew Dan was not the type to defect, and if he'd gotten lost then the soldiers, both regulation army and SOLDIER, should have found him when they searched the area for the stragglers.

"Let me know if you hear anything," Cloud managed to say. He was torn between wanting to think about the cadet who had stuck by him, and the emotional ties he felt were hindering him. Dan hadn't been part of Cloud's future. In fact, Cloud could just remember that flash of Dan's partially burned face in death overlapping his lively one in the barracks. He still couldn't remember the circumstances behind that, but if Dan truly had defected then it was unlikely it would happen again.

"Sure, sure," Reno replied. "Ah shit, I gotta go. Damn patrol movements," Reno complained before cutting off the call. The blond shook off the gruesome image, firmly put away thoughts of Dan, emotional ties, and his own shortcomings, and tried to think about his upcoming meeting with his squadron.

* * *

After trekking from Icicle Inn to Modeoheim, Vincent had made Banora, a tiny village on the Mideel continent, his next destination. The lead he'd found in Modeoheim pointed straight at Hollander's interference with Jenova, and Banora was an old base of his.

Unfortunately, getting from the Northern Continent to Mideel was never a straight shot, and Vincent hoped to avoid Midgar and Junon where Shinra presence would be strong if he could help it. That meant taking a more roundabout way by going through the Western continent and down to the Gongaga area where he could catch a small boat to Mideel.

From Modeoheim, the ex-Turk made his way back past Costa del Sol, skirting patrols and Shinra personnel, and over the foothills of the mountains on his way towards the Golden Saucer. He spent much of the trip mulling over the Jenova situation, Cloud's potential future plans from Midgar, and on a smaller scale what he had found in Icicle Inn. It was only a matter of time before everything came to a head, but at the moment there were a lot of hanging threads: Jenova's disappearance was the greatest one, particularly because Cloud had been convinced she wouldn't move for another five years.

There was also the matter of Hojo himself and Cloud's mako examinations, which might create a sticky situation. Vincent and Cloud both couldn't know for sure, but the blond had been determined to go forward with it, and Vincent hadn't been about to argue. While he loathed being chained to the demons the advantages in battle were without match. Vincent could take on a First Class SOLDIER now, especially if he transformed, and if Cloud's recollections were anything to go by, it had taken the blond, him, and a small group of strong, dedicated fighters to take down Jenova. Cloud would all the help he could get, especially if he refused to bring his First Class SOLDIER friend into it.

Vincent agreed to leave Sephiroth out of this, and not just for personal reasons. Cloud was adamant that Sephiroth and Jenova's meeting was the trigger for the catastrophe the future became and should be avoided at all costs. Cloud hadn't detailed much, but the blond made it clear the General was quite suspicious of him too, which would mean if Cloud wanted a shot at Jenova it would likely require Sephiroth to be otherwise engaged. Tricky, but not impossible.

As Vincent considered the situation and how best to take the General out of equation without alerting him over the days of travel, he reached the outskirts of the Golden Saucer. While the Golden Saucer itself was essentially a city within a casino, there was a rudimentary town outside it that catered to those who couldn't afford the pricey life inside. Vincent found a small inn tucked away that was perfect for a hot meal, a shower, and an early start the next morning, not to mention a little town gossip.

As he was finishing his dinner some of the local men took seats around the room. Vincent could hear their vague curiosity about him, but he ignored the group and worked to finish his meal. Just a few minutes after the men's entrance though, the innkeeper, a kind, curvaceous older woman, interrupted him by refilling his cup and hooking her thumb over her shoulder.

"Those _men_ over there wanted to know if you passed through Costa del Sol. There's not many soldiers 'round here, but up there there's plenty." She rather sassily put her hand on her hip and shot a look at some of the men in one of the corners. Vincent hid any amusement that the men had been too intimidated to speak to him but the innkeeper hadn't.

"I did go through Costa del Sol."

"Hmph, well, any trouble? We had a right mess here couple days ago caused by some real hooligans. Couldn't get them out of the Saucer fast enough. Thought they may have headed in that direction." Vincent shook his head, and the men across the room went back to their talking. The ex-Turk hadn't seen anything on the road that was suspicious, but he wasn't sure if this was something to look into.

"Were they mercenaries?" He asked, probing for a just a little more information to be sure. It helped that the innkeeper was more interested in talking than serving the warming pitcher of beer on the bar.

"If they weren't before they sure could be. Caused some big fighting and a real scene. People are thinking they're Shinra defectors, you know? The three of them cleaned right through security like they were children."

Vincent put down his utensils and gave the woman more of his attention. While the Golden Saucer security wasn't exactly SOLDIER, the casino had a large number of security personnel due to the nature of its business, not to mention some of its shadier dealings. He was interested in hearing about people capable of taking on those kinds of numbers.

"What were they after?"

"Looking for someone I heard." She shrugged before glancing back over at the men in the corner and cursing softly when she spied the beer still sitting on the counter. She walked away without so much as a goodbye, and Vincent finished up his food and went upstairs.

He waited about half an hour until he was sure things were quiet and night had fallen before leaving through the window of his room, heading for the casino. The flashing and dancing lights of all the tacky advertisements outside the Golden Saucer were almost painfully bright in the dark. Vincent's red and black outfit stuck out from the vibrant neon colors and gaudy clothes of the Golden Saucer's patrons and workers, but luckily he was more interested in speed tonight. The guard booth was laughably easy to break into, and with two swift strikes to the back of the neck the guards were out cold. Even twenty-five years out of tune with technology, the ex-Turk was able to access the flagged videotapes from two nights before without much trouble.

On the screen were a series of grainy images of three men in black outfits, one with a katana across his back, one with two guns, and the other with some contraption on his right forearm. Vincent watched them argue with the guard before the smallest one with the katana struck out with a fist and punched the man so hard his neck snapped back, very obviously broken. Security piled in and Vincent watched the way the three men, all with bright silver hair, decimated the guards, using both weapons and raw strength that went clearly beyond a human level.

He downloaded the video on to a spare flashdrive in the office, wiped the footage of him entering, and left without a trace. Vincent had a feeling he knew who these three men were, and if he was right Cloud needed to know immediately.

* * *

Cloud jogged over to the SOLDIER gyms, feeling somewhat disconnected from the nerves he should be feeling at his first introduction to his squadron. He was the only new recruit to be assigned to this team because only one member had been elevated to Second Class. The blond wasn't sure of Aaron's or John's placements yet, but he knew the heavy armor teams were usually the ones with the most open spots. Members there were more likely to die in the field or be taken off active duty if they didn't get promoted, according to Zack.

In each squad there was a total of eight Thirds and the squadron leader, a Second. Cloud didn't know anything about his team other than they were a light-armor squadron. The blond resolutely ignored the niggling of annoyance in the back of his head at this. His activity as a SOLDIER was secondary to everything else, he reminded himself firmly, and he didn't need to be in a squad that saw a lot of action. In fact, this might even work in his favor.

Light armor troops were built more for speed and agility, and typically were more geared towards guerrilla warfare tactics. They acted primarily as scouts when on missions, but were also second response teams following the initial heavy-armor waves. Stationed in Midgar, this team probably worked on keeping the gangs in check and checking up on monster sightings in the area surrounding Midgar.

The members would likely specialize in smaller weapons like knives and daggers, hand-to-hand combat and ranged weapons. The Buster sword wasn't made for light-armor combat, but with Cloud's build and a broadsword it wasn't a bad fit. Most importantly it would be low-key work that would let him focus on other things.

As Cloud approached the gyms he saw a Second Class SOLDIER waiting outside one of the doors. "Cloud Strife," the man greeted, "I'm Captain Kyle Harke, squad leader of Midgar's stationed Third Class light armor team. Lieutenant General Zack Fair speaks very highly of you. We're looking forward to having you on the team." He offered Cloud his hand.

Captain Harke was a dark-haired man with a neatly trimmed goatee probably in his late thirties. His grip was firm and warm, and he had a clear military persona that Cloud could appreciate.

Harke opened the door to one of the smaller gyms where an assortment of guys were talking and warming up. They paused as the captain introduced Cloud and they came over to say hello. Many seemed to already be aware that Cloud had been training under Zack.

"Nice to meet you Strife, heard about you from a Second class buddy of mine. My name's Youta, looking forward to seeing what you can do." He was the co-captain, who would lead the team if the Captain Harke were called out on Second Class duty. He was also the member most likely to be elevated to Second Class in the next wave of promotions. All the greetings were variations along the same line, and Cloud shook everyone's hands before Harke told them to lay off and start warm ups.

The practice session went smoothly, all told, and Cloud was able to let go of some of his concerns for the time and lose himself in the physical activity. Squadrons practiced together three days a week. The rest of the time SOLDIERs had either individual training schedules geared to their strengths and interests or missions. Today Harke led them through a series of simple, team-building activities to help Cloud mesh with the group.

While Cloud knew the men expected him to be handy with a sword courtesy of his training with Zack, what he actually impressed them with was parkour. They were doing a pretty standard obstacle course that required a partner to complete. Cloud was paired with Xolis, a relatively thin SOLDIER but with quick reflexes and impressive strength for his build. The blond could see striking tattoos on Xolis' arms where he had rolled up his sleeves. There was an image of a woman, an ornate pattern of flowers working up to his elbow, and Wutain characters among the colors.

Together the two scaled walls and navigated a complicated rope net and a tire trap before the final stretch that had two paths: one was curving but relatively clear, the other was shorter but required weaving around a variety of objects. Xolis opted for the longer route that had fewer obstacles to clamber around but could be sprinted through, while Cloud would take the other.

At the heart of parkour is using momentum and the landscape to maintain speed, thus getting from point A to point B in the most efficient way. Instead of going around objects and reducing precious time and energy, parkour emphasized going over or under, using both hands and feet to propel the body. It took focus, strength, and good hand-eye-foot coordination, and even without a lot of practice Reno's lessons seemed to have done the trick.

Cloud took off, hurdling over low bars, vaulting from a pommel horse, and doing one-handed push offs to grab bars in one smooth move, always maintaining forward momentum. Fortunately the course was short and predictable without too many objects he had to actually go around, so he made it to the end almost at the same time as Xolis. Marking the finish of the whole course was a high wall that would force his partner to help him up.

Cloud was moving quickly enough from his sprint that he ran straight at the wall instead of slowing to use the short rope Xolis was readying. At his speed, he was able to get two steps up and jump to catch the top of the wall. Before a surprised Xolis could even move to help him up, Cloud had hauled himself over the wall with his upper body strength alone. His partner just gaped at him before finally giving him a quirky grin.

"Guess you didn't need my help after all."

Cloud shook his head and winced a bit as he walked back to the team. "If you've got a bandage, I think I banged my knee when I scaled that wall." Looking down there was a nasty bruise forming on his kneecap from where he'd hit the wall.

"I'll one-up that." Xolis pulled out a Cure materia and cast a low-level Cure spell on Cloud, who immediately felt some of the aching of his muscles and joints melt away, along with the twinge in his knee from where he knocked it.

"Thanks."

Xolis just laughed. "Next time get Hyler to heal you. He's a hell of a lot better at it than I am." He slapped Cloud on the back and moved off to get water as the blond rejoined the group where he was immediately asked about the parkour. After fending off questions and explaining that Zack didn't teach him, he had picked it up from another cadet out of boredom—only half true—Cloud walked away from that first meeting with the squad feeling good about it. If only the same could be said for everything else.

* * *

Busy didn't even begin to cover Tseng's life at the moment.

With Veld's abrupt departure he'd been thrust into the role as the head of the Turks without much idea of what it entailed. Half of Veld's files were so encrypted it would take weeks to decode, and some pertained to active missions that Tseng hadn't even known about.

He'd barely had a week to figure out the gist of how Veld had run the department before Heidegger announced—without telling Tseng first—the trip to Junon. And the executive didn't just want a Turk bodyguard contingent; he wanted three-quarters of the department to go with him.

Tseng had argued, but the older man had the ear of the president and the power to make things difficult for Tseng, and he already had a pile of crap to go through as it was. Rufus had offered to step in, but Tseng had refused on principle because this was his department for the moment. The vice president of Shinra hadn't been much more thrilled with Heidegger's insistence on this excursion, but the president had effectively rubberstamped it. The curl of Rufus' lip and short look at Tseng had been enough to convey his utter disdain of his father.

_Patience…_ Tseng reminded himself. All in good time.

Heidegger was going out to Junon for some promotional stunt with the canon, and wanted the Turk presence because there were vague threats AVALANCHE would try to attack and disrupt or destroy the weapon. It sounded more like he wanted the ego boost of a department at his back but he was too frightened to try and bully the General into it.

So most of the Turks went to Junon and started patrols without any clear idea of why. Heidegger tended to treat Tseng's men like assistants or prostitutes—it didn't always depend on the gender—and he continually had them changing patrol schedules, who they were supposed to wire tap, and giving them miscellaneous objectives to fill the time. It was, in short, driving Tseng mad.

He wasn't the only one fidgeting through the morning announcements Heidegger insisted upon. Tseng's gaze zeroed in on Reno, who looked bored of his mind. Rude undoubtedly felt similarly, but he'd never show it. It was like Reno's exaggerated gestures counted for the both of them.

"Team 3: shore patrol. Team 4: outer wall of the north side. Team 5: southern deck…"

Reno rubbed the end of his ponytail between two fingers as he listened to yet another patrol change for the Turks. He and Rude had been shuffled around to five different routes in two weeks and no one quite knew why Heidegger insisted on changing them. Tseng looked stressed though, which made the annoyances a little more bearable.

"…And Team 9: stationary guard at base." Reno groaned; standing upright for a six-hour shift was brutal. Rude never complained, but then again he showed about as much emotion as a statue. Reno on the other hand…

"Aw man, why we gotta be stationary guards _again_ , yo? That's what we did last week," he groused as Rude led them out of the conference room and down the hall to the military base security room where they would be assigned to a specific corridor or entrance. The only upside had been access to a computer, which is how he'd found out Cloud had been assigned a PHS. "C'mon Rude, you've been a Turk longer than most. Can't you pull some strings or somethin'?"

Rude ignored him as usual, and Reno didn't mind it. That was just how Rude was. Still, the redhead complained almost all the way to the southern entrance to the base headquarters they would be guarding until he spotted someone waiting by the door. "Oh come on!" Reno cursed at the sight of Tseng standing there.

"This is a happy coincidence," their boss said, and _to hell it was_ Reno thought, "but to clarify your objectives, keep a sharp eye out for anything out of the ordinary. There has been rumor of an impending AVALANCHE attack in the area. It's public information that Dr. Hollander is being kept here, and there may be some connection between him and them."

Tseng's eyes flicked to Reno, who was a doing an admirable job of maintaining his surly expression. Fortunately for Tseng, he was naturally suspicious, and Reno was pinging on his radar.

"Any comments or questions, Reno? Rude?"

"…"

"…" Reno scuffed the ground but mimicked his partner.

"Nothing from your old connections, Reno?" Tseng added a bit slyly. He'd dismissed Reno's old gang connections and other than tagging Cloud Strife's file he'd left the blond to the tender mercies of the General, but it didn't mean he wasn't happy to poke at the redhead.

"Not everyone's in bed with AVALANCHE you know," he snapped. "Even folks down-below think they're extreme."

Half-truths and dodging the question. Typical Reno. Tseng had neither the time nor the inclination to interrogate him though, so it would have to wait. Heidegger and his stupid campaign unfortunately came first.

* * *

Cosmo Canyon received a fair number of tourists all year round. The attraction of the physical landscape coupled with the visitors interested in the Planet and the history meant it drew a somewhat eclectic sort of people. The three boys who had come by late last evening though, were of a completely different sort.

The innkeeper's daughter of the Shildra Inn was quite surprised when three silver-haired men walked in the door, all dressed in dark, tight-fitting clothing. The bell above the door jangled loudly as she swallowed uncomfortably. Nervously she stood waiting behind the counter as the one with hair as long as a woman's approached.

"Excuse me," he said politely, even as he looked down his nose at her, his expression barely hiding disdain, "Do you know of Jenova?"

The girl mutely shook her hair. She'd never heard of anything called Jenova.

"Hm," he said disinterestedly, glancing back at the other two standing just a few short feet away. "No, I don't think she's here."

"We were closer back near that waterfall," said the largest of them petulantly. It was a strange thing to see such a powerful man wearing the expression of a child.

"Idiot," snapped the youngest. He was obviously the most volatile by his attitude, his fine silver hair a curtain over one eye. "There was nothing there, we checked a hundred times."

The one directly before her spoke again, his voice deceptively smooth. "Perhaps we should try a…bigger city." The way his strange green eyes slid to hers indicated he was insulting her home.

The youngest one growled, the noise startling her slightly. "We already did, and it was a waste of time." When the biggest one snorted and picked a photograph of her father off the mantel to look at, she felt offended. Puffing up a bit she swallowed her nervousness and said, "If you want help, you can try Elder Bugenhagen."

The longhaired one looked back to face her directly, his fine aristocratic mouth turned up in a sneer. She might have thought him quite handsome if he didn't frighten her so much. "Hmph, we'll see what your elder knows." With a sharp pivot, he and his brothers left, and the girl let out a relieved sigh. Whoever they were, she hoped they never came back.

Loz outside immediately began to question the townspeople about where they could speak to this Bugenhagen. Several women ran off because of him, but finally one young man stutteringly directed them up to the observatory at the top of the mountain. When they reached the bottom level of the tower they found what appeared to be the kitchen and living room of a small home. On the opposite side of the table in the center of the room was an older man, hunched over studying a star chart of some kind. "Can I help you gentlemen?"

"We're looking for our mother," Kadaj said impatiently, "and your Elder might know where she is."

"Oh, hm," the man said, rubbing the top of his bald head. He had little hair left, and what was left mostly made up his large, graying mustache and impressive beard. "I don't believe he can help. He mostly studies the Planet, and no one has come through looking for children."

Loz started to sniffle as he realized Mother wasn't here either, but Yazoo's scornful look stopped him before he really started to cry.

"Your mother, hm?" The old man asked; his hands clasped in front of his dark purple jacket. "And what might her name be?"

"Jenova," Kadaj said instantly, voice proud.

"Ho ho hooo, there's no Jenova here," the man said, and Kadaj barked for them to leave before turning around and nearly stomping out.

The other two followed him out, and Bugenhagen's worried expression lingered. Those boys were bad news, looking for Jenova. And their resemblance to General Sephiroth was uncanny.

Back on the edge of mountain, Loz depressingly stared into the distance, as Kadaj seemed to gather his anger inwards. "Where is she!?" he cried out, and Yazoo glanced over at their most volatile brother. "Where is Mother?" he repeated, looking more upset than ever. Loz's sniffling started anew, and Yazoo felt a mixture of scorn and sympathy. "We've searched all over, and found nothing. Someone must be keeping her, hiding her from us!"

This was the theory they'd been bouncing around for some time, but had yet to find anything concrete. They'd spent weeks trying to figure out where they kept feeling Mother, discovering they could sense her often in mako. Traveling south from the crater they'd awoken in, they had initially gone to where the Ancients had lived, since some townsfolk in the frigid town of Icicle Inn had thought Jenova was some mythical deity related to them. They'd found nothing in that crystallized forest but a shell shaped building and ruins.

From there it had been erratic travel and a lot of dead ends. Loz was incomprehensible, sometimes sobbing like a baby, other times brutally violent. Yazoo liked to think he was the most mature of the group, and definitely the most stable, but Kadaj's mercurial moods meant it was better to appease him than to argue. He was just as likely to strike a brother as he was to hold one.

The frigidly cold mountains had seemed really promising, but in the end all they were hearing were echoes. Mother was calling to them through the mako, but she wasn't there. There had been such hope with that woman they'd met in the cave, but she'd been no help after all. The deep pool of water southeast of the mountains with the waterfall was the most confusing, and they'd spent almost a month there trying to understand why they could hear Mother's call stronger than before. Kadaj had been even angrier than usual, frustrated when they found nothing. In the end they'd left, heading south for another Ancient's site, when they'd ended up passing through here.

"I hate these humans," Kadaj said vehemently, voice roiling with rage. "They don't know of Mother's wonder, _can't_ know. We'll find her, and Mother will make the ones who hid her pay. And then she'll love us more than any other. She will conquer this Planet and have her revenge!"

Kadaj spoke with such fervor that Yazoo smiled, thinking of something he knew would help curb both his brothers' anger for a while. "Brother, what say we show them a little of Mother's wrath?" Kadaj's slow smile was full of anticipation.

* * *

Cloud's second mako injection was scheduled for 0900. He sat in the waiting room with three of his peers, one leg bouncing slightly before he caught himself. The room was lined with plastic chairs without anything to look at on the walls. There weren't even magazines to read, and none of his fellow newly minted SOLDIERs were much in the mood for talk. Mako injections were not fun for anyone.

The first injection had not gone nearly as smoothly as Cloud had hoped, and he was very worried about this one. He still distinctly remembered when Zack had told him he'd said Sephiroth was dead, and the sensation of the bottom of his stomach dropping out. He was only thankful neither Zack nor Sephiroth seemed to have taken too much stock in it, but if the hallucinations continued they might.

The blond had tried to see if he could avoid the mess of spilling secrets by hiding the scheduled time of the appointment, but Zack had found out from the General when the injection was and promised to pick Cloud up again. The dread of not just the injection but what his reaction might be was making his palms sweaty. His leg started to bounce again before he consciously clamped down on it.

A nurse came in, wearing a white lab coat and carrying a standard clipboard with the Shinra logo emblazoned on the back. "Cloud Strife?"

Cloud stood up quickly, and nervously made his way over. She led the way from the waiting room to one of the identical exam rooms lining the hallway. He took a seat on the loose paper covering the examination table as she took his vitals.

"A doctor will be here momentarily," she said, before leaving and soundly shutting the door behind her.

The room felt small and overly sterile as Cloud tried to take deep breaths and stop kicking his legs like a child. There was little to look at, and all the sounds from outside the room seemed amplified. He could hear another SOLDIER being escorted out, and then two more sets of footsteps passing by the room. Finally, after the minutes dragged on listening to every little noise, someone's steps outside stopped and shuffled the paperwork in the folder next to the door.

Two nurses again came in, followed by an unfamiliar scientist in a lab coat. They called them doctors here, but Cloud cynically referred to them all as scientists because they did not focus nearly as much on healing as they did on experiments.

No one spoke as one nurse prepped him and the scientist prepared the syringe with the mako in it. Cloud's eyes were automatically drawn to the bright liquid, and he felt a knot in his stomach form. _Please let this reaction be better._

The scientist didn't even tap his arm, just swiftly stabbed the needle in. Cloud stifled the flinch, even as he wanted to cringe at the sensation of the sluggish mako in his veins. The needle was removed and disposed of, and the two nurses helped him off the table and out the door. Zack wasn't in the waiting room, and Cloud wondered if maybe he had gotten lucky and the First had forgotten.

He made it out the door and almost to the elevator when Zack appeared. "Spike! You're out already? You should've waited in the waiting room for me, I don't want you to get sick or anything on your way back."

Zack put an arm around his shoulders before he could protest and pulled Cloud back into the elevator. "Feel okay? Still recognize me?"

"I'm fine, Zack," the blond said, feeling a little annoyed at the coddling, and a little hot from the warmth of his clothes. If he had a solely physical reaction to this mako injection, Cloud would happily retch up everything he'd eaten for a week.

"That's what you said last time, buddy."

Zack kept talking, punctuating his comments constantly with questions about Cloud's lucidity until Cloud finally interrupted. "I feel fine, Zack! A little warm, a little itchy, but I just need a bath and a nap."

Zack put his hands up in a show of surrender, but the genuine worry on his face wasn't enough to put off Cloud's peevishness.

They arrived at Zack's apartment without any trouble until Cloud saw who was sitting on the First's couch.

"Zack, I don't need _both_ of you here. I'm just going to sleep, and everything will be fine." Cloud managed to shove Zack's arm off his shoulder, but he did it harder than intended and caused his friend to stumble. The blond looked wide-eyed at him, surprised by his own strength.

"I think he's starting to feel it, Seph," said Zack to the General sitting on the couch watching Cloud. "He's been awfully talky."

"The bath is already drawn, Cloud."

Most worrisome, the blond narrowed his eyes and frowned at Sephiroth, something definitely out of character for him. "I don't need a mother, Tifa," he said, before abruptly freezing.

"Tifa?" Zack asked, and Cloud's eyes snapped to him before he suddenly turned and marched over to the bathroom. "Leave the door cracked, Cloud," Zack called, before sharing a concerned look with Sephiroth.

Cloud stripped off his clothes, tossing them haphazardly away, thankful for the respite from their itchiness. He didn't know what Shinra made those out of, but it felt like raw wool. He briefly covered his face, giving into to mild horror of accidentally calling Sephiroth _Tifa_. Zack was right when he said the mako was getting to him. Vowing not to say another word, Cloud sank into the hot bath water.

As the water soothed the irritation of his skin, his mind was able to drift, floating calmly, reminding him of laying on his back in the water…somewhere. He couldn't quite remember.

He kept drifting, almost sleeping, until he felt someone touch his left shoulder, trying to shake him. He flinched, looking down at the hand touching just above the pink ribbon he'd tied over his Geostigma.

He shot the person a cold look. "Don't touch me," he said, before pushing their hand away and standing up from where he'd been sitting and looking out at the distant ocean. He was on top of one of the tall rubble heaps of old Midgar that still had some of the best views. "You shouldn't be here. There are monsters about."

"Cloud?" The man asked, but Cloud brushed him off and started to walk away. He needed a drive on Fenrir, something fast and hard. If someone wanted to be out here where the big monsters were, then he wasn't going to save them from their own stupidity. He reached for his goggles, but couldn't find them on top of his head. Maybe he'd left them by the motorcycle.

Another man stood in front of him, taller than the other one, and now Cloud stopped walking. Was someone really stupid enough to attack him? He didn't have any swords on him, but he had more mako in him than any living person, and it was child's play for him to kill a man with his bare hands.

"Walk away and I won't hurt you." That was the only warning they were going to get.

"Cloud," a deep, smooth voice said. The way his name rolled off the man's tongue was familiar. Too familiar.

"Who are you?" Cloud demanded. Was there another Remnant? Cloud had known there were more, but he thought most of them had been destroyed in the Northern Crater, and the rest were all but comatose. Who was this?

"It's me, Sephiroth," it said, and the baritone matched Cloud's memories, but there was no way this was him. Sephiroth would have struck first and saved the mind games for when he had Cloud dangling by the end of the sword. That's usually how it went. Cloud knew what this was.

"You're not Sephiroth. You're not real." He pushed past the apparition, frustrated and angry that after two years the images had faded but never gone away.

"Cloud," said the first voice, and Cloud realized he knew this one too.

"Both of you, just leave me alone," he said, feeling more tired than angry, but still annoyed enough to show it. "I don't want to talk to the dead."

That usually did the trick. To acknowledge them as dead, as gone and done with, usually sent them away. Cloud had numbed himself to the pain of these reminders, even though his mind wouldn't stop haunting him. This time the first man disappeared, but not the second, not Sephiroth.

"Cloud…"

"No. You're just a memory," he said firmly, and walked away.

* * *

When Cloud woke up he was laying on Zack's bed in a clean set of boxers. His first thought was of his grumbling stomach, and he wondered if he'd thrown up. He felt a little out of sorts, but that was a normal reaction. He couldn't remember anything after the bath, but he realized after a second Zack must have moved him and even dressed him. And Sephiroth…!

Cloud flushed before he could help himself, before consciously trying to shake the embarrassment off. He was a grown man, and it didn't matter anyway.

The blond swung his legs to the side of the bed, looking around a bit. He'd been in here before, but usually just to meet Zack for practice. The room was pretty messy, as expected of the First, with a couple old posters on the wall that the man hadn't quite grown out of, and clothing thrown all over. There was a cactuar figurine on the bedside table, and a clock that had long stopped ticking and Zack had been too lazy to throw out. The room, especially the sheets, smelled slightly of his cologne and a bit of uniquely Zack, which Cloud was too proud to admit he liked.

He was just looking for a shirt to put on when Zack opened the door, the smell of pancakes and hash browns following him in. Cloud froze, since he was only in his boxers, but the SOLDIER just shook his head with a half smile and pointed at a messy pile of clothing on a table in the corner. "That's for you. When you're ready come out. Seph just came by and I'm making eggs too."

Something about Zack's less enthusiastic manner put Cloud on guard. He swiftly dressed and stepped out, reading the atmosphere and knowing with dread that something had happened. Did he have another delusion? A violent one? He could barely remember the first, but this time he remembered nothing at all. He was almost afraid to ask what other memories had surfaced.

Sephiroth was standing by the kitchen counter, just looking at him. There was something about his posture that put the blond ill at ease.

"Cloud." The way he said it was familiar, but Cloud pushed away the odd déjà vu and sat down on the couch. He looked down at the carpet and took a breath.

"What happened?"

Zack came out of the kitchen with a plate of scrambled eggs, the only kind of eggs he knew how to make, and sat down opposite Cloud. Sephiroth didn't move from where he stood. "You had another delusion. This one more…coherent than the first."

Cloud swallowed with a little more difficulty than normal. He wasn't quite able to make eye contact with either of the other SOLDIERs, the tension in the room too high.

"You didn't recognize us," Zack started, not eating his eggs. "You told us to walk away, and pushed us both away." Cloud's eyes were fixed on the carpet, so he missed the look Zack sent Sephiroth over his head.

Sephiroth picked it up, his voice solemn. "You told me I was not real, and that you did not wish to talk to the dead. That I was just a memory."

Cloud took a deep breath at Sephiroth's last words, the moments when the General said those words playing behind his closed eyes. Crowned by the storm, his beautiful face etched with shadow, he said he would never be a memory as a promise. And he wasn't one. The blond opened his eyes, able to see Sephiroth's boots, but almost afraid to look higher.

"Do you know what you were talking about, Cloud?" Zack asked.

Cloud took a deep breath. "I do, but I can't tell you."

Zack sighed, and there was a clink as he put the untouched plate on the coffee table. "Cloud, this isn't about just you anymore. You looked Sephiroth directly in the face and said you didn't want to talk to the dead. That whoever you thought you were talking to was a memory. Do you…" Zack seemed unable to get the words out, and the blond looked briefly over at him. "Do you…see these people?"

Cloud's eyes flicked between Zack and Sephiroth, both their faces deadly serious, and Zack's tinged with worry.

"No," Cloud said, and he was able to look away from the floor. "It was a… reaction to the experiments. They're gone now," and he murmured so softly Sephiroth barely caught it, "another life."

"Cloud…" Zack said softly, voice laced with compassion.

"I don't want to talk about it." Cloud said, and after a moment added more quietly, "I'm sorry if I scared you." Then the blond looked up, making eye contact with both of them. "I think it's better if I deal with these alone."

Then he got up and left.

* * *

"If I gotta stand here for another goddamn hour I'm deserting. Think Tseng's got enough men free to hunt me down?"

"…"

Reno sighed, leaning over the railing of one of the towers alongside the cannon compound. He and Rude had been shuffled all over this complex, and got stuck with yet another stationary position, this time overlooking the major square outside the compound. Reno's gaze flicked over to the heavily fortified building where Hollander was locked up. He had fantasized about sneaking in there to ask the scientist a few questions for Cloud, but that would just land him in a cell next door.

Reno turned his eyes downward again and picked at flyaway strings on his suit jacket, eyeing the masses below with disinterest. He followed the swift weaving of a dark-haired man in a blood red cloak and… were those _gold_ _shoes_? before eventually the guy walked away and he grew bored again. Too bad Shinra-issued PHSs didn't have any games on them and had restricted internet access.

"Yah think if I say 'ain't nothing happening in this town' enough I can jinx it?" he called back over his shoulder.

Not expecting a response, Reno jumped when he heard Rude say loudly (for him) "Reno!"

Reno whipped around and immediately shouted, "What the hell?!" as he saw a guy with big black _wings_ fluttering over the rooftop. The angel-thing hadn't spotted Reno or Rude yet, but he was dodging bullets from somebody. "He's got wings!"

Their radios started to spew out orders and a lot of shouting, enough that obviously they weren't the only ones seeing this. Reno did a quick survey of the rest of the towers and saw a number of other angel-guys spread out and picking fights. Most of the Turks on duty were busy fending them off. Reno and Rude glanced at each other and as one made for the flat part of the deck to help with the fight.

They rounded the corner to find two other Turks engaging a winged guy, but he was fast and he had a wicked sword in his hand. Reno drew his gun and started to fire, and between the four Turks they managed to clip his wing, and once he was on the ground Rude made sure it was lights out for the guy.

"Who the hell is he?" Reno asked a bit breathlessly as he approached, gun still drawn. Angel-dude had light-brown hair and a standard uniform on so he didn't look much different than the average grunt, except for those two splayed black wings. The redhead had an idea though, especially as he recalled the group of winged attackers near Hollander's jail.

Reno looked up at his partner, who was studying the very-dead angel's face. "You recognize him?" he asked, sounding uncharacteristically serious. Reno would rather believe Cloud time-traveled than think the blond had anything to do with these monstrous experiments, and it looked like he'd called the attack on Junon.

"Looks like Genesis."


	34. Übermensch

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Junon is under attack but Cloud has two allies there. Too bad dinner with Sephiroth and Zack means only he can protect himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Writer's Note: So many of you readers have been with me since practically the beginning, and I am completely humbled that you have still stuck with me even through a lot of starts and stops. So thank you thank you thank you to those of you who messaged/reviewed/PMed me to show your support. This next chapter could not have gotten out nearly as fast without you. That said, the last chunk of this chapter has gone through revision after revision, but as I will be on holiday tomorrow I wanted to get it out before I leave. So I don't think it's perfect, but I hope you like it nonetheless.
> 
> (Also, I've never actually played the sequence when Junon is attacked in Crisis Core, so I probably mucked up the details. Let's all pretend it's just the ripple effect…)

"Goddamnit!" Reno cursed as he took the corner too sharply and banged his shoulder on the brick. One more bruise to add to his collection thanks to a small army's worth of Genesises. Genesi? "Fucking clones!"

He was chasing two of them through the streets of Junon. Most of the cannon compound had been breached at this point; the Turks weren't really equipped to handle clones of a First Class SOLDIER, and they'd gotten rather sleepy with their patrols—Tseng was going to whip them later for that. But for now, these winged nuts might not have the same strength and agility as the original Genesis, but they sure did pack a punch.

Somewhere in the haste to get off the roof where they were standing targets and into the heart of the attack, Reno had lost Rude. However, he'd also remembered something vital: _Hollander escaped_. That's what Cloud had told him. An attack by Genesis clones to free the scientist, and damn if Reno wasn't in the middle of it.

He took the next corner a bit less sharply and careened on to the street adjacent to the jailhouse. All the doors and windows were barred of course, with the standard metal grates for double protection, but it wasn't built to withstand the kind of materia blasts the clones were hitting it with. The two clones he'd been following had disappeared, but there was a bigger problem ahead.

"Hey you assholes!" he shouted up, hoping to get the hovering clones' attention. Two glanced his way, but they didn't move from the protective circle they'd formed around the single winged guy that had the materia. Guarding him then. That was just great.

Reno started running for the next building over where there was a stairwell—Heidegger's constant patrol changes were good for one thing: he knew the general layout of the whole area—and started to climb. Thank god for all that military training, because four stories up and he wasn't as winded as he thought he'd be.

The materia blasts on the wall of the jailhouse were getting louder and more frequent, which probably meant they were breaking through. Reno drew the gun he'd re-holstered and took aim as he topped the fifth floor and started to fire.

The clones were strong, but their wings weren't that tough, and a few bullet holes would usually drop them to the ground, or at least make flying very difficult. Of course, now that he was attacking the most important part of the siege on Junon, he had three winged assholes on him.

"Fuck!" he yelled, breaking off on to the rooftop to make some space. He had his nightstick—finally, as a Turk he could use whatever weapon he wanted—but three on one were not good odds.

Reno didn't get far before gunshots exploded across the rooftop, and Rude landed a moment later on one knee, head shiny with sweat but otherwise immaculate.

"What took you so long?" Reno yelled, waving his gun at his partner.

Rude punched the nearest angel-dude instead of answering, and Reno took real pleasure in electrocuting the next one.

It took precious minutes to take down the three, and neither Rude nor Reno had come out unscathed. Reno's suit was torn up, buttons missing and his belt cut almost completely off, which was making his pants awkwardly slide down. Rude's knuckles were bloodied and sunglasses cracked, at least until he pulled another pair out of his suit pocket and slipped them on without a word.

"They're trying to free Hollander," Reno explained as he tried to draw breath, kicking the nearest guy on the ground. Thanks to all the shocks Reno had to give them before he could land a killing blow, the winged guys were starting to smell slightly like roasted pigeon, and it was making Reno hungry.

"Too late," Rude intoned.

"Ah shit." Reno spat as he finally looked back over at the jailhouse to see a gaping hole where Hollander's cell must have been. "Fantastic. Just what I need."

Rude's head turned sharply to the side. Reno followed his look and realized maybe their luck hadn't quite run out. Hollander must have only just gotten out, because he was running down the street with two angels for back up.

As one, Rude and Reno raced down the fire escape, making quite the racket. On ground level they ran after Hollander as closely as they could, but the scientist was surprisingly quick and he weaved in and out of alleys to maintain distance. Reno could swear out of the corner of his eyes there was someone in dark red following too.

Hollander's path went back toward the cannon complex with Reno and Rude panting at his heels. The scientist rushed into the open square outside the cannon's main gates just in time to get hit by three rounds fired from off to the right. Reno swung around fast enough to hurt, but couldn't see who in the shadows had fired them. Hollander went down, but unfortunately his angel buddies didn't. Together they hoisted the man up and with astonishing speed got him into the air. Reno, Rude, and the mystery guy kept firing to bring him down, but two more winged guys appeared to fend them off, and before long Hollander was up on the roof of the cannon's building wheezing but alive.

"What is he gonna do?" Reno gasped as they drew to a stop. Two angels were down, Hollander was wounded, and the red-caped dude was long gone from his hiding spot. This attack just kept getting weirder. "Sprout wings and fly?"

Rude adjusted his glasses and checked his ammunition. It was looking like a possibility.

The Turks on the cannon would have to deal with this one though, because there were more fights going on and more problems on the ground. Reno and Rude fought through another small wave of angels undoubtedly there to cover Hollander and make sure he got away. By the time they'd downed another seven, the scientist was long gone and the fight was over.

In the aftermath everyone rounded up the nearby bodies and piled them up in the center of the compound, finding there were around forty of the identical bastards, all wearing the face of the missing First Class SOLDIER. Not that Reno was supposed to know that until Veld appeared in the midst of the Turks and announced it.

"This is further confirmation of ex-First Class SOLDIER Genesis Rhapsodos and Professor Hollander's association. It also indicates that Hollander does not need to be present in order to create these clones." He looked down on the corpses; face blank as usual. They were kind of creepy all stacked together like this; like a bunch of broken dolls.

Reno looked away and instead tried to read Tseng's expression. with the sudden return of their leader, it had to be kind of awkward to have his position usurped again so suddenly, but of course the Turk gave nothing away.

"President Shinra has reinstated me as head of the Administrative Research Department," Veld finished with, giving no explanation for how that had happened. He walked off to join Heidegger, who was for once not laughing, leaving Tseng to deal with clean up.

"Burn all the bodies. Six teams go out and make sure the rest of the city is clear. The attack was concentrated in this area, but they approached from all sides. Return for at 1900 for an analysis on our defense." Tseng bit the last words off, clearly pissed at how long it had taken the Turks to kill the encroachers. None of the Turks were stupid enough to wince or show any visible reaction, but a kind of collective shudder went around when Tseng strode off.

Rude and Reno were assigned to the eastern part of the city to clear the streets, combing the suburbs for any traces of the clones. The people had been warned to stay inside by emergency sirens, and no announcement it was safe had happened yet, probably on Tseng's orders. The fewer rumors there were about Genesis clones the better.

"Reno! Hey Reno!"

The redhead jumped a bit at the sound of his name being whisper-shouted, and peered down an adjacent side street, deeply suspicious. Rude was on the other side of a small park checked the side streets too, and Reno had only heard his partner say his name a grand total of four times.

"Over here! It's me, Dan!"

Reno's eyebrows were crawling into his hairline as he peeked over someone's fence. Sure enough, hiding in front of a gated house behind some bushes was Dan. He had longer, floppier hair like it hadn't been cut recently, and his clothing was a little ill fitting, but Reno would recognize that stupidly happy expression any day. He'd woken up to it way too many times.

"So you grew a pair and defected," Reno said in lieu of a greeting.

"No! It's… well, it's more complicated than that. I have to know if those were really clones out there," Dan said, almost near pleading. "That's what people are saying."

"Sorry, that's confidential, yo. Shinra only information on a need-to-know basis," Reno drawled, but a little piece of him felt reassured to see Dan was all right and even eating well. He'd honestly never thought he'd see the annoying kid again. "What are you doing here anyway? What happened during the exam?"

"No really, were those clones? Of a guy named Genesis?" Dan persisted.

Reno's eyes narrowed and straightened slightly from his slouch. "How do you know about Genesis?"

"Because I met him in the forest! I followed Cloud from the campsite but I got lost and ran into him."

"You just followed some guy in a forest?" Reno interrupted incredulously, wondering how Dan was still alive if he had such shitty instincts.

"Well I was lost and there were monsters," he said, constantly glancing around. Reno could see Rude in the distance waiting by the end of the park, but he wasn't approaching and Reno sent a short thank you to the Planet for having one awesome partner. "Anyway, I followed Genesis to this blown up building and it was the Nibelheim Reactor I learned later. Someone had attacked it! Genesis was really mad about that—"

"Wait, wait. Attacked it?" Reno repeated. "And this Genesis guy was pissed?"

"Yeah. It was just a pile of metal when I saw it. That wasn't the only thing destroyed either, but Genesis left after seeing the reactor. There was an old mansion owned by Shinra in town too that burned down." Dan was watching the play of emotions across Reno's face curiously.

The redhead, meanwhile, was calling Cloud every unsavory thing he could think of in his head. He was going to pin the blond down like those butterflies Tseng hung on his wall until he talked. Cloud had said he'd checked the reactor for Jenova during the exam, but conveniently forgot to mention he might have stopped at a couple more places and picked up a sledgehammer on the way. That was quite the omission, but also something Reno hadn't seen reported. Now that was curious.

"Alright, I gotta think about how to strangle Cloud later. How the hell did you get back here?"

"You think _Cloud_ did that? I don't think that's really something he'd do," Dan argued instead.

"Trust me, I know Cloud a lot better than you think," Reno replied, knowing Cloud would be _very_ interested in an ex-SOLDIER poking around the Nibelheim reactor. "You know Junon is Shinra-owned right?"

"It's my home!" Dan yelped, thankfully letting go of the Cloud part of the conversation. "Where else could I go? I ended up in Nibelheim like I said, and a nice snow-plower drove me down the mountain and nearly to the Gold Saucer. I knew I couldn't go back to Shinra then, so I came home and I've been living in the carriage house at my grandmother's." Dan swept a hand back to encompass the house. Reno had been totally right, kid had money.

"Okay, your life I guess," Reno said skeptically. Dan had remained under the radar this long probably because he was never SOLDIER material, and as long as he stayed that way he'd live. Not a life Reno ever wanted, but whatever, he had other problems. "Alright, now tell me word for word what this Genesis guy said to you."

"Not until you tell me what he was doing here! And what _you're_ doing here. That's not a SOLDIER uniform."

"I'm a Turk."

"Like the recruiters?" Dan asked, and Reno grunted an affirmative.

"Kinda like that. More of a…we'll-kill-you-if-you-don't-join department. Now what did Genesis want in Nibelheim?"

Dan was eyeing Reno with distrust, probably thinking the redhead was exaggerating—which he would be if it weren't Shinra. "He said it was his mission and started quoting stuff from this book. He was interested in the exam too, but when I asked if he was going to Rocket Town he ran off." Reno groaned. Nothing useful then.

"You said Genesis was wearing red?"

"Yeah, red cape with a long red sword."

"Dark red?"

"No," Dan shook his head looking thoughtful, "more of a Carnelian red."

"What the hell is Carnelian red?" Reno snarled, but Dan wasn't intimidated by him anymore. At least hanging around Cloud had done the kid some good. "Okay, so not-so-dark red cape, kinda ripped on the bottom?"

Dan frowned, thinking. "No. He was dressed really nicely; had good style."

Reno heaved a put-upon a sigh. "Okay, look, you hear more about Genesis or anything weird call me." He scribbled his PHS number on the back of Dan's hand before the kid could complain. "I'll tell Cloud you're alive so he doesn't bury himself in guilt. And don't get fucking caught by Shinra, because you might be serving life in the army for defecting and then Cloud's gonna have to blow the General to get you out."

Dan wouldn't stop smiling, which made Reno want to punch him, but he settled for shoving the former cadet back into the bushes and stalking over to Rude.

The silent Turk didn't raise any eyebrows or ask any questions about what he'd seen.

"I'll tell you later," Reno finally relented, wondering how many people Cloud had killed in the future, and whether he'd murder Reno for telling Rude.

* * *

Vincent studied the corpse carefully; noting how the skin was baby-smooth and the wings grew straight out of the shoulder blades like true extensions of the body. There was no scar tissue and no surgical markings of any kind to indicate experimentation. This was a true clone, but one that hadn't had any consideration for its own life—more of a drone really.

The ex-Turk wasn't familiar with Genesis, a former First Class SOLDIER, but many of the current Turks were, and he'd listened to their chatter from a stolen radio. It confirmed what Cloud had told him: Genesis had defected along with another First Class almost a year ago and had been a thorn in Shinra's side ever since. Thanks to Shinra's machinations though, he was too powerful to be killed by anyone except the General or a concentrated group of Firsts. It was no surprise then that Cloud's story of Sephiroth's defection had resulted in catastrophe if one First going rogue was this bad.

Vincent shook his head at the folly of man and left the clone's body to be found and went to find a place to stay for the night. Despite the Turks' presence here, it seemed they hadn't been anticipating the attack. Cloud had predicted it though, and he'd been quite accurate except for Zack's presence. There were no Firsts here, no one other than the standard Third Class SOLDIERs on guard duty at the city gates.

As before, Hollander had gotten away, and Vincent hadn't been able to do much to allay that because of the sheer number of Turks around. As it were, several had spotted him in and around the area, so come Saturday he'd been twice as careful in his spying, and by the evening was resigned to finding somewhere seedy to avoid the Turks. It didn't take him long to spot a hole-in-the-wall bar with a flickering sign and a back-alley entrance.

"Beer?"

He nodded at the surly bartender who filled his glass. The drink no longer affected him after what Hojo had done, but he had to purchase something to remain in the bar.

Friday night and all day Saturday had been spent collecting leads from the townsfolk and stalking a few of the Turk patrols to listen in on their gossip. Most of it was of interest to Vincent but unrelated to Hollander. His partner from when he'd been a Turk, Veld, was still around, which was a bit of a surprise given the average life expectancy of a Turk. Veld had been skilled, a quick draw and a good shot, and more than a little clever. If anyone were going to outlive most Turks it would have been him.

He'd returned to lead the Turks like he'd never left, though whyhe'd left at all sparked a lot of rumors involving AVALANCHE and compromised security. It was also unclear how he'd returned, but most of the speculation was more ridiculous than likely. Vincent knew Veld was perfectly capable of any means necessary to get what he wanted though, so the ex-Turk filed it all away.

A man stumbled into the bar banging the door and interrupting Vincent's train of thought. He laughed loudly as he ordered a drink from the barman, and his blue suit was rumpled, shirt un-tucked and tie askew. There was no mistaking the Turk outfit or the red hair though. Vincent sunk further into the shadows of the booth and watched the rookie Turk. He seemed plenty comfortable in this seamy area, lighting up a joint from a man on one of the bar stools and chatting along with an exaggerated but definitely native Midgar street accent.

He'd been the one chasing Hollander, Vincent recalled. For all his drunken gesticulating and weaving now, the kid had bright eyes on the street.

Vincent slipped out as silently as he'd come in, leaving his money on the table, but he only made it to the end of the alleyway before someone shouted behind him.

"Hey you!" It was the redheaded Turk, he saw at a fleeting glance. "Guy with the gold shoes!"

Vincent didn't stop though, turning the corner and quickly scaling the side of a building before the redhead could follow. He was halfway out of town before Reno stopped calling for him and went grumbling back to the bar.

* * *

The weekend was supposed to be a break for the SOLDIERs, with no mandatory meetings or training sessions and all the gyms, pools, and weapon lockers open. Of course, Cloud was usually more than happy to train with Zack, but he'd rather been hoping for a break from the First. He'd been spared on Saturday, but Zack hadn't stayed away long.

Cloud started his routine, ignoring Zack who was hovering nearby. The First hadn't offered to do an extra training session this weekend, but he'd popped in now to watch. Only when Cloud had started his workout what Zack really wanted came out.

"Come on Cloud," he whined after getting two firm rejections. "Seph is ordering in the really nice stuff from this fancy restaurant. Aren't you sick of cafeteria food?"

"No Zack," he said shortly, counting breaths as he did press-ups. Arm and shoulder muscles were the most important area he needed to work on to wield the buster sword properly, though he fully intended to do a whole-body workout.

They'd had all their usual sessions that week, and Zack had been perfectly professional and friendly, but Cloud knew that every time he looked away, every time he mastered a form quickly or did something unexpected in a fight, Zack would get this look on his face.

He and Sephiroth seemed to believe him when he'd said Angeal hadn't trained him, but Cloud knew their suspicions had only gotten stronger. Tuesday's… hallucination had been bad for all of them. Zack had broached it once concerned about his mental health, and he'd gotten a long stare from Sephiroth in the hallway the next morning that told him enough: Zack thought Cloud was dealing with some kind of PTSD, but Sephiroth thought there was more to it.

"He's got a really fancy apartment! Or we can do it at mine if that's better," Zack wheedled. The First had gotten wind of Sephiroth's invitation for dinner, and now the General was following up on it—by sending the Puppy to talk Cloud into going.

"I don't want to."

"I won't ask any questions; no poking and prodding." Cloud's eyes slid over to Zack, who was sitting on the floor by him. The First was abashed enough to realize the experiment metaphor was a bad one. "Just dinner with friends."

Cloud refocused his gaze. He didn't know how to make Zack's persistence stop, but maybe for once honesty was the best policy. Zack already knew Cloud was hiding secrets after all. "I don't want to keep lying to you."

"Then don't," Zack said flatly, his irritation slipping in.

"Isn't there anything else we can talk about?" Cloud grit out, angry all over again with himself and with Zack for pushing. He'd promised to focus more on the future and less on his friendships, but Zack was making it difficult. He finished his set on anger alone and rolled over to start doing crunches, glad that the paced breathing and exertion let him channel his frustration.

Zack sighed loudly. "Maybe Seph just wants a break from work, thought of that Cloud? The General's been swamped since the exams, and now the attack on Junon and the reports out of Cosmo Canyon and the Golden Saucer. They're talking about sending more SOLDIERs out to both places."

Cloud knew all about the attack on Junon thanks to Reno's call. The redhead hadn't been able to give him much detail over the phone because of wiretapping—Turks called it "conference calling" as a joke according to Reno—but Cloud had gotten the gist of it. Hollander was free, Tseng was pissed, and Dan was alive.

"What reports from Cosmo Canyon?" he asked between breaths. Zack lied down next to him and started to do crunches too since he hated to watch someone else train. He didn't pant when he answered though.

"Couple guys out there did a lot of damage. No one dead, but a lot of injuries and a lot of freaked out people. Though they did kill a bunch of guards in the Golden Saucer."

"Gang?"

"Maybe, though the report made them sound kinda crazy. They were bothering people and weirding them out." Cloud paused just a moment in the middle of a crunch, struck by how he didn't remember this information before. Maybe Zack had never passed it on.

"What did they want?"

"Inconclusive. Seems like they mostly wanted to stir people up." There was a tinge of annoyance in Zack's tone, but he otherwise described it like any mission. "Anyway, I think Seph just wants to relax for an evening. If I go alone I'll get stuck listening to his critique of the food and complaints about his new secretary the whole night. You can't leave me like that, Cloud." Zack did his best pout, but Cloud wasn't looking. He felt torn between wanting to please Zack, and putting distance between these attachments.

It didn't help that Zack was still begging. "You can also see Masamune's decorative sheath," the First added to sweeten the deal. "It's worth more than my bike. Sephiroth loves talking about it but I've heard the story at least three times, so just come and ask him one question about it. He'll be thrilled to have a new audience."

Cloud would have sighed if he hadn't been breathing carefully between crunches. He really shouldn't because the future… but if he could steer the discussion to talk of recent events, like Junon and Genesis and possibly even Lazard, it might be of value to him. And he _did_ want to know why Lazard might seek out Zack.

"…Alright. Just… I'm not going to answer any questions."

"Yes!" Zack punched the air, uncurling from the ground. "That took less than an hour! Seph's paying for the whole dinner now."

"You _bet_ on me?" Cloud asked incredulously, counting out his last three crunches before rolling to stand up.

"Don't worry, I had a feeling you couldn't resist good food. Although… Seph was gonna pay to retrofit my bike with new tires if I could get you to agree to another spar with him…"

"No."

Zack chuckled, already knowing Cloud would definitely refuse that. "You know," he said thoughtfully, pretending not to analyze every one of Cloud's facial ticks, "after that first injection when you kicked my ass in the bathroom, he said you moved way faster than any Third Class he'd ever seen."

Cloud's expression that had been hovering near light-hearted turned flat almost immediately upon remembering that experience. Zack pursed his lips but hid his dismay. "I'm just saying he was impressed, and he thinks you've got a lot of potential."

"I'm already going to dinner, you don't have to flatter me too," Cloud said churlishly, unhappy about the reminder of the injections. He was regretting accepting dinner now. Zack had promised no questions, but Sephiroth had not, and it wouldn't be against the General's nature to take advantage of that kind of technicality.

"I'm being honest, Cloud," Zack said quickly, sensing that Cloud might take back his acceptance or just plain not show up for the dinner now. "He really likes you. Seph doesn't invite people over to his place. I'm pretty sure other than me and… some other First Classes he's never had anyone else over. It's a real compliment."

Cloud just shrugged, but he was starting to read as more uncomfortable than angry, which Zack counted as a win. "I know you like swords too and trust me, that sheath is a great talking point. He loves talking about it to people who appreciate swordplay."

_Thick_ wasn't a strong enough word to describe Zack's buttering up, but it was worth it just to see the tips of Cloud's ears go red as he ducked his head slightly. Zack threw an arm around the blond and hid his grin in his spikes. Sephiroth and Cloud weren't exactly healthy, well-rounded individuals, but maybe some of their jagged edges could fit together. Of course, Cloud's secrets were a giant impediment even as they reeled Sephiroth in.

"Alright! Be at my place by 1800, and if you don't show I'll come looking. Seph's apartment requires a special keycard for security purposes."

"Sure," Cloud muttered, shrugging out of the embrace. Zack let him go, smiling fondly outwardly but still watching Cloud carefully. He and Sephiroth had spent a lot of time going back and forth over Cloud's admissions and what they'd gleaned from his actions in that mako haze.

Zack considered those things and Cloud's reticence all week as he rode the elevator up to the General's office, because of course Sephiroth would be working on a Sunday. He'd forced the General out from behind his desk yesterday though for a hard spar in the desert. Sephiroth had won of course, but Zack had done his best to make it difficult—in fact, he'd even used that wrist-twist he'd seen Cloud do.

"Hope you went to the ATM!" he sing-songed as he walked in the door.

"Credit card," Sephiroth replied without looking up. "Am I going to have to check the security tapes to be sure you aren't lying?"

"Cross my heart," Zack joked, making the X over his chest. "He just really doesn't want to talk." The First flopped into the available chair and immediately put his boots on the desk. "I tried to mention the injections casually, and he turned right back into a robot. He's been like that all week."

Sephiroth nudged the boots back off with his pen. "I am not surprised. Whatever secrets he is keeping are not hidden once mako is in his system. It is an obvious weakness he knows we will take advantage of." Sephiroth had devoted a lot of time to picking apart the hallucinations, but there wasn't much to go on, and right now there was a more volatile puzzle to solve.

Laid out in front of him were the reports from Cosmo Canyon and the Golden Saucer. The security tapes had been collected from the casino, and the descriptions from the canyon matched the video, but it was anyone's guess where the men had come from. Three silver-haired men of varying sizes with significant combat training had made of mess of both places. Human security had been easily overwhelmed, which prompted the General to seriously consider a contingent of Thirds to go out there.

There was something else too.

"Prior to the Golden Saucer we don't have any sightings," he explained even though Zack hadn't asked. The First was leaning on the desk to see the papers. "But there was the destruction of two Shinra properties in Nibelheim."

Zack's eyes widened as Sephiroth handed him the reports on the Shinra Mansion and Nibelheim reactor. He flipped through them reading a few passages here and there. "I'd heard something had been destroyed, including the reactor, but that was one of the oldest ones out there. Most SOLDIERs thought it was done by a demolition crew." The pictures obviously told another story. The Mansion had seemingly collapsed after being eaten away by fire, and the reactor… the exterior shell was heavily damaged but standing, however the inside was trashed.

"They were destroyed from the inside out," Sephiroth concurred. "The reactor was physically destroyed with a sledgehammer or similar weapon, causing instability in the mako and fuel compounds and generating a series of explosions. Some kind of monster in the Mansion burned it to the ground, but it's unlikely that was a coincidence. Evidence suggests both events happened within a 24-hour period."

"Planet," Zack murmured. "You think these three did that?"

Sephiroth hesitated for just a moment, almost eerily like Cloud's nanosecond hesitation when Zack had mentioned the Cosmo Canyon violence. "The Mansion was used for experimentation. It is… very likely the sight where Cloud was tested on."

Zack's eyes only had to flick to the top of the report to see the dates. "Why didn't you tell me?" he asked sharply.

"I have not told Cloud I am aware," Sephiroth said instead of answering, but the stare he was boring into the desk made it obvious why. He could empathize with Cloud's anger and frustration, and if he could burn Shinra Headquarters to the ground he would do it too. Zack forgave him a little as he understood this, but if he'd known before he might have been able to weave that into what he'd told Cloud about the Golden Saucer and Cosmo Canyon.

Zack breathed out a bit noisily to gather his thoughts. "Okay, but now you think this might not be Cloud's work at all? And these three guys instead?"

"It's a possibility," Sephiroth conceded. "I too was in Nibelheim for a short while as a babe. It may have been destroyed with similar motive to Cloud." Neither of them mentioned aloud the silver hair all three unknowns sported, but the conclusion was… it was why Sephiroth was here on a Sunday pouring over the documents.

"Looks like we'll have to ask Cloud then," Zack said tiredly. He rubbed his eyes, unhappy with the idea. He knew Cloud was going to be pissed. The thought of pressing charges didn't occur to either of them though. Other than destruction of property, Cloud hadn't killed anyone or damaged anything remotely important. It would also be an easy way to drive him and all his secrets into a locked box forever. "I told him you didn't want to talk about work though."

"It does not mean it could not be mentioned," Sephiroth commented casually, mind switching gears as he sat back. Cloud was almost a familiar problem now, he thought with a bit of fondness.

"And if Cloud did it? What then? It was a stupid thing to do."

"Or calculated," Sephiroth said, lips pursing slightly as he considered. "With the Mansion gone, any evidence regarding his experimentation that isn't on Hojo's private servers was eliminated. Thus preventing us from finding whatever secret he wanted to hide."

"And the reactor?" Zack flipped a few pages in the report, skimming the comments Sephiroth had written in the margins, including a number underlined in red. " _Report Altered_ ," he murmured, recognizing Sephiroth's handwriting. Zack had to skim through a few more times to see what Sephiroth did: all of the pictures were of the same angles of the room, neglecting other views and leaving obvious holes in the image painted of the interior of the reactor. "They're hiding something."

"Yes. Tseng was kind enough to fax me the unedited reports." Sephiroth's voice was as expressionless as always, but the way his fingers flexed as he pushed a manila envelope on the table over gave him away. This wasn't an easy subject for him, and Zack wondered just what Tseng had been threatened with to give it up. He flipped open the folder and saw a plethora of pictures that were… very, very damning.

"Planet, what were they doing?"

"Early human experimentation," Sephiroth said drily, gaze fixed on the back wall now, miles away. "We'll never know exactly without Hojo's files."

"This is mako-based though," Zack felt he had to point out. "Cloud had no mako exposure prior to his first injection." Even as he said it, the First knew that Cloud would've destroyed this lab just on principle. He rubbed his hands down his face, a moment later remembering that Sephiroth's experimentation had been solely mako-based, and he'd just said he spent some time in Nibelheim as an infant.

"Even if Cloud did not do this, the fact remains that most of the evidence to his claims were there and are now gone," Sephiroth pointed out. "If the three unknowns are responsible, and given Cloud's missing time in the exam, it's logical to suggest he knows them."

That was a dangerous thing to say because those three had proven to be aggressive and lethal—any association would be damning for Cloud. "I won't believe that unless Cloud says it," Zack said forcefully. He still believed the hallucinations he and Sephiroth had witnessed had been from Cloud's experimentation. The blond suffered deep mental scars, but he wasn't anything like these three guys.

"Until otherwise proven I agree with you, Zack," Sephiroth replied, eyes flashing between all the scattered reports on his desk. "Cloud is very much a controlled individual, and has none of the neuroses or instability reported in these men." Sephiroth waved a hand over the blurry security footage of one, the smallest with hair covering one eye looking up at the camera. "That said, you have promised to not ask anything of Cloud tonight, but I have said nothing of the kind."

"He's going to hate you for resorting to a loophole," Zack pointed out.

"As he comes to know me he should expect it."

* * *

At 18:03 Zack was ready to march out the door and find whatever hole Cloud Strife had hidden himself in, but he forced himself to wait another agonizing two minutes before the new Third finally knocked on his door.

"I thought you weren't coming!" he said immediately as he opened the door to admit the resigned looking blond.

Cloud glanced at the clock, and then realizing how wrong Zack's kitchen clock was, pulled out his PHS instead. "I was five minutes late."

"Yeah well, when you hang around with Sephiroth you get used to his punctuality."

"Must not rub off," Cloud muttered under breath, forgetting that Zack could hear him and getting his hair mussed up for that.

"Come on, let's head up since I have no doubt at 18:16 on the dot I'll get a PHS call about my lateness," Zack joked, grabbing Sephiroth's spare keycard and nudging Cloud out the door.

Sephiroth lived in the same building as the Firsts, but he had the penthouse on the top floor. Zack chattered about the food they'd ordered as he swiped the keycard and the elevator automatically started to rise. When they reached the top the doors opened into a simple, but elegant foyer with plain, light-colored wood floors and the kind of stark, modern furniture that looked tastefully expensive.

Cloud toed his shoes off after Zack and padded behind him into an open-plan living and dining room with a stainless steel kitchen off to one side. Everything looked pristinely designed and mostly untouched, except for a few landscape paintings Sephiroth must have chosen. Parallel to the dining room table was an impressive set of floor-to-ceiling windows that offered a spectacular view of the desert and quite possible the ocean, though the cloudy sunset obscured the far-off view.

"Welcome," Sephiroth said, jolting Cloud from the mesmerizing view to one that garnered a very different stare. Sephiroth was dressed even more casually than he'd ever seen. The work shirt's top two buttons were undone, the shirt pulled up slightly like he'd been reaching up high, and he'd gone shoeless, just in black socks.

"Lemme help with the dishes, since apparently eating out of cartons is too good for you," Zack said with a smirk, and Cloud was still staring so hard he missed how Zack's eyes darted slyly between the General and the Third. "Go ahead and poke around, Cloud." Zack nudged him in the direction of the living room, as he walked by.

Prominently displayed on the far wall was an intricately painted and carved six-foot long sheath, which immediately drew the eye. The sword itself was resting on a stand in the corner, but Cloud approached the sheath slowly, examining the story told down the length of the etched wood. It looked like the fable Sephiroth had told him, about the beast Gilgamesh forging the sword.

"I met a man east of Gongaga that made it. He was formerly a blacksmith with great appreciation for unique weaponry," Sephiroth said suddenly from behind him, having gravitated over from the kitchen while Cloud was occupied. The blond had to consciously relax his shoulders from the start, because Sephiroth made no sound in socks. "He was the one who had the scroll with the story of Gilgamesh on it."

"What is this?" Cloud asked, careful not to touch as he pointed at a character about a third of the way into the etching. Gilgamesh had forged the blade now and was attacking some flying green bird with it. It looked vaguely like the Emerald Weapon.

"Valefor, as the Wutains call it. A great creature that comes from the depths of the Planet. It was the first beast Gilgamesh slew with the sword in the story. The blade absorbed some of the creature's skills, giving Masamune the ability to channel magic. Most of the rest of the sheath depicts similar battles."

Cloud swallowed a bit thickly as Sephiroth elaborated on some of the more interesting sequences. His voice was usually so expressionless, but now was rich with interest in this ancient Wutain tale. Cloud was only hearing about half of what he said, the rest just letting that sound wash over him.

"Gilgamesh remained undefeated, but in the story it is said he felt as though he were slain when his closest friend was killed. He was buried with the sword." That was the last part, right at the tip of the blade. A tiny seal there was the mark of the craftsman.

"How long did it take to make?" Cloud's voice almost sounded raspy, and he peeked up at Sephiroth from the corner of his eye. The General was examining the end of the blade in thought, but at Cloud's look his eyes flickered over.

"Three years in total."

Cloud looked back at the sheath, but his eyes were already returning to Sephiroth again. "It's beautiful," he said honestly.

"It is." They stared at each other for several long moments until the sound of utensils falling on the table broke them apart.

"Oops. Sorry to interrupt your moment," Zack said with an exaggerated wink, hands full of cutlery, "but I'm pretty sure Seph will kill me if I try to move the rice dish thing because it'll be a mess."

Cloud couldn't stop the flush up his neck as he realized just how absorbed he'd be in the story. Hadn't he come here intending to be _less_ distracted by Zack and Sephiroth?

"Yes," Sephiroth's smooth voice cut through his embarrassment, but the General hadn't missed the sight of that blush. "I should cover a counter with plastic when you are visiting."

"Can I help?" Cloud offered as soon as Sephiroth padded away into the kitchen. Zack handed him the pile of silverware he was holding to set up, along with the plates while he went back in to retrieve some of the simpler entrees. Cloud strained his ears to hear if Sephiroth and Zack were talking in the kitchen as he laid everything out, but all he heard was something else clatter and then Sephiroth's deep voice saying, "This is why I chose the fortified dishes."

Not long after, the two reappeared with plain white dishes full of food and then went back for a second batch. With two First Class SOLDIERs and a Third, they could eat an elephant's share between them. There was some kind of roast stew with potatoes that appealed to Cloud's country roots, and ribs drizzled in sauce. There was a quiche too which Sephiroth said was seafood based, and baked tomatoes and pineapple that Zack would appreciate, among several more dishes. It all looked and smelled delicious, and just the sight was enough to make Cloud's mouth water.

"And you were gonna eat at the cafeteria," Zack said with a laugh, reading Cloud's expression correctly.

"Sit, Zack," Sephiroth ordered when the First started to go back towards the kitchen.

"The best part isn't out yet though!"

"I was under the impression pie was a dessert and reserved for last," Sephiroth said without an ounce of humor. Zack shot an imploring look at Cloud.

"Hands in the cookie jar means no cookies in your hands for dessert," Cloud repeated verbatim from his mother. He said it so automatically he looked comically surprised in his chair as Zack burst out laughing.

"Betcha you were the kid that stole cookies all the time."

Cloud flushed a bit, remembering the tiny, cozy kitchen in his house, with the little jar always sitting by the refrigerator. "She counted them."

Zack started to really laugh, but Cloud missed whatever else the First was trying to say between chuckles as he remembered many an evening sitting on his bed regretting his enthusiasm for the sweets his mother made—except his birthday, when he was welcome to eat as much as he could stand.

His mother's chocolate cake recipe was in the box under his bunk, in fact, along with her birthday card. He hadn't heard back from her since he'd replied, but it was still January, and Nibelheim often had snow from December to February. It would be no surprise if the post couldn't get in or out.

"I'm guessing you have a sweet tooth," Zack said with a cheeky grin, ladling out portions on to his plate. Sephiroth started taking vegetables from another bowl and Cloud went straight for the beef and potato stew.

"A bit," Cloud admitted, starting a small conversation about various sweets in Nibelheim and Gongaga versus what Midgar had. Sephiroth commented sometimes, but mostly preferred to watch Cloud steadily relax into his seat and Zack talk away comfortably. As much as Sephiroth savored Cloud's relaxation around him, especially after the two mako injections, it was also the time when his defense was its weakest.

"Your team has a mission tomorrow, correct?" Sephiroth asked, turning the conversation when the talk of food and culture lulled.

"Yeah," he answered, swallowing quickly. "Just below the plate I think."

"Exciting, huh, your first mission!" Zack exclaimed, poking through one nearly clean bowl for any last bits of carrot or mushroom. Cloud had pushed all of his mushrooms to one side of the plate, never acquiring the taste for them, but Zack couldn't see it behind the centerpiece.

"How do you like your captain?" Sephiroth asked.

"Harke? He's a good guy."

Zack rolled his eyes at his plate at Cloud's typical short answer. "I've never done a mission with him, but the other Seconds like him. Speaking of which Seph, who are you sending out to Cosmo Canyon?"

"A team of Thirds led by a Second. Heavy." It wasn't the smoothest transition to what they really wanted to talk about with Cloud, but the blond didn't seem to have noticed. He'd slowed down on eating and was starting to look a bit sleepy, which Sephiroth found it hard to tear his gaze from. "Most likely Zuke's team."

"Is he the one with the broadsword with a snake on the hilt?" Cloud asked, sitting up a bit. "I know one of his members." John had talked a lot about his captain.

"That's him," Zack confirmed winking. "He has a weird thing for snakes, but he's a good guy to have at your back. I did a run with him somewhere…" Zack's brow furrowed as he tried to recall.

"I'm confident Zuke will be able to handle the problem in Cosmo Canyon," Sephiroth continued, starting to pile up the dishware that had been emptied. "His team is quite good, and there is a squad in Wutai should it become necessary."

"It's only a few guys," Zack finished, standing up and noticing at the same moment Cloud had a small pile of mushrooms on his plate. He speared three with his fork immediately and Cloud sighed. "And luckily we know how they fight thanks to the security cameras."

"Yeah, the Golden Saucer," Cloud murmured, standing up too to help. He didn't have quite the metabolism of the Firsts, so the food settled heavily in him while Zack and Sephiroth had no such issue. Cloud couldn't remember the last time he'd quite felt this full. Tifa had certainly tried.

Sephiroth had disappeared into the kitchen while he was thinking, but he reappeared now holding a dishtowel. It was such a domestic thing that Cloud actually stopped halfway through lifting his plate to watch as Sephiroth dried his hands with the towel. He did it as elegantly as he did anything else.

"…yes, though they were likely in the Nibel Mountains before then," he was saying, and Cloud twitched a bit at the mention of his home, realizing he'd been staring.

"There's nothing there," he said with a frown, feeling a sudden foreboding. Zack was concentrating on juggling some of the heavy dishes on the way to the kitchen, but Sephiroth was watching Cloud with those eerie bright eyes. The bright green color made his open, assessing look uncanny.

"The reactor in Nibelheim was destroyed not long ago," Sephiroth stated.

The blond felt like a piece of ice had slid down his spine. It wasn't like he'd tried to hide what he'd done in Nibelheim, and he'd do it again a hundred times just for the satisfaction alone, but the way Sephiroth was staring at him made his skin crawl with the revelation. _He knew Cloud had done it_.

His eyes narrowed on Sephiroth, who was openly watching his reaction.

"There's some speculation," Zack's voice carried from the kitchen, followed by the sound of something banging on the counter, "Sorry! –Speculation that they might be associated with AVALANCHE. Particularly the Ravens." Zack couldn't stare at Cloud from where he was, but the words bit just as deep. Cloud had told Zack about the Ravens ages ago; that was a deliberate jab, and Sephiroth was still watching him.

The blond's stomach tightened as he sensed this had been another trap like that first spar with Sephiroth. Sephiroth and Zack weren't asking questions as promised, but they were pushing at the wall his secrets were behind and hoping to see a crack. Loopholes and technicalities.

He might have dropped the dishware a little harder than necessary on the counter next to the sink where Zack was now elbow deep. The First was eyeing him too, not even pretending to clean. It took all of Cloud's willpower not to react as Sephiroth stepped into the kitchen behind him. All sleepiness from the good food and banal conversation was gone.

"Dinner was good," he said as evenly as he could, turning so he could see both men and wondering just how flat-out rude he could be to escape and simmer alone. "I should—"

"The pie'll be better," Zack promised, cutting the blond off and giving him puppy eyes. "You can't leave before the best part."

There were a hundred excuses he could say or he could even just walk out, but Cloud stayed his feet. He could leave now and give them more time to speculate or he could cut it off, like pinching the artery to stop the bleeding.

"You said this would just be a dinner as friends," Cloud accused, not bothering to beat around the bush, and all movement in the kitchen stopped. The blond didn't realize it, but he was mirroring the same tone he'd used during his second hallucination. Sephiroth certainly did though.

"It is, and we _are_ friends," Zack denied. He pulled his hands out of the sink like he was going to reach out to Cloud before realizing how sudsy he was. "I'm sorry if we put you on the spot like that, Cloud. It's just the secrets—"

"I told you I didn't want to lie to you." Cloud's glare had moved from hot to searing at Zack's denial, and Sephiroth was careful not to lean forward when he thought he saw a green tinge in the background of those blue irises.

"And I told you not to," Zack snapped back, putting one hand on his forehead before remembering he was still covered in soap. He quickly dried off so he didn't get soap in his eyes as Sephiroth shifted forward in the background and that glare was switched on to him.

"Perhaps direct would be best. Did you destroy the Nibelheim reactor and Shinra Mansion during the SOLDIER Exam?" Sephiroth's face was as always perfectly blank as he watched Cloud pause, taken aback for just a second, before coming to some decision. The blond's face went from shuttered to cold, not an ounce of emotion leaking through. Only the green of his eyes got brighter.

"I did."

In the silence of the admittance, they could all hear Zack breath in sharply.

"To be sure we would not learn what happened to you?"

Sephiroth's logic was strangely reversed, since Cloud had done it precisely to ensure _Sephiroth_ wouldn't learn about what happened to _himself_ there. There was another perfectly good reason though:

"Revenge."

Sephiroth didn't immediately respond, so Cloud transferred that mako-touched gaze on to Zack. "You didn't want me to lie, so that's the truth." It was a challenge.

All the glibness and shock was gone from Zack's voice when he answered. "It doesn't matter how bad the truth is, we'd both rather hear it. We can't help you if we don't understand, and you keep hiding it behind omissions and lies. What am I supposed to think when you reenact memories and tell me they're going to get you? When you beg me for help? When you fight like a warrior ten years your senior? I'm your friend Cloud, and I would have smashed that laboratory with you if you'd asked!"

The greenish tinge of mako behind Cloud's eyes rapidly disappeared at Zack's raw voice, and the harsh façade he had adopted started to splinter. He'd obviously thought his admission would drive Zack and him apart or at least inspire fear of his volatility, but it had done the opposite.

"I don't care if you punch me in the kidney and knee me," Zack said determinedly, "but you're my friend, Cloud." The First half-tackled Cloud to hug him, and the blond went stiff almost comically, face unwittingly buried in Zack's shoulder, but he didn't respond to the hug.

He never quite lost the cold edge, like a chill he couldn't shake off, but it was softened significantly. Zack finally released him when Sephiroth took out the pie, though both of them saw how Cloud flinched violently when he remembered the General was still there. Sephiroth moved carefully, wanting to test the atmosphere to see if he could ask about the three silver-haired men, but when Zack gave him a warning look as he passed out the dessert plates, Sephiroth relinquished that line of thought. Another time.

Zack handed a warm piece of pie to Cloud and watched him take at least three bites before he even touched his own. It was a monumental sacrifice for Zack, who normally demolished pie in two breaths. Cloud had burrowed himself deep in Zack's heart.

Sephiroth ate slowly as he watched the blond, who continued to keep his back to the far wall so he could see the kitchen exit. His eyes never quite made it to his plate either because he'd lose sight of them both. That hole in Cloud's explanation niggled like a loose tooth to Sephiroth, but the peace was fragile now; dredging up more pain would not be productive.

Cloud finished his slice of pie carefully, with measured amounts of cream, fruit and crust until there was nothing left. Only then did Zack let him take his leave, though he and Sephiroth both followed the blond right to the elevator doors.

"Like I said before Cloud, you ask for help anytime and you got it." Zack couldn't quite resist another hug, but Cloud didn't respond to this one either. He looked almost pained, but Sephiroth wasn't sure if it was from the touch or something else.

Then Zack was letting the blond go, but he didn't get more than a step away before Sephiroth put two of the boxed slices of pie into the blond's hands and remained there in his personal space. Cloud was… not a friend in the way that Zack and others were or had been, but there was a kinship there he could not deny, nor could he argue any indifference towards him. Sephiroth… _liked_ Cloud in his own way.

"The next time you desire to destroy a laboratory, I too would like some revenge," Sephiroth murmured, a strong admission for him, but one he'd been thinking about since Cloud had said the word. _Revenge_ … a potent, heady idea, and one he'd avoided ever latching on to because it was an abyss, as he'd seen in a hundred other men.

There was a twitch in Cloud's jaw, but whatever words or expression he was fighting to keep inside did not escape. As he took the elevator down, Sephiroth promised himself he wouldn't let Cloud fall into that abyss.


	35. Impatience is a Virtue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cloud's under a lot of pressure to get things done, but his solution might be questionable. At least he's got Reno and another old friend for back-up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Writer's Note: I've said this before but I'll say it again: I've never played Crisis Core or Before Crisis. Those events are very muddled and confusing to me, so rather than attempt to figure them out from the Wikipedia (esp. since I've already fucked with Cloud and Reno's timelines) I'm just going to cherry-pick events and shift them around in time so that they work with the story, but the prequel events to FFVII are still roughly the same.
> 
> Also, on Ao3 I combined chapters 4 & 5 and may do so with other chapters that are just too short and interrupting the flow in my opinion. So that's why you see a discrepancy between chapter numbers on ff.net and here.
> 
> Thank you to Chisuto for beta-reading this chapter! Your help was much appreciated!

Youta, the co-captain of the squad, was waiting at the meeting point Monday morning with three of the other members of their squadron there already. He had a pile of weapons beside him, and Cloud accepted the broadsword offered to him. Only First and Second class SOLDIERs were allowed to keep their weapons in their own rooms, so their captain or co-captain had to distribute them before every practice session and mission.

"Mornin'," Youta said, looking only slightly more awake than the rest of the guys. He gave Cloud a troubled look nonetheless when he noticed the grim cast to the blond's features. "Captain's getting a transport right now."

Cloud nodded stiffly and buckled the sword sheath to his hip, measuring the slight imbalance in his weight. The buster sword was always worn on his back for obvious reasons, so it felt odd to be carrying a sword another way. He wondered how long it would take him to convince Zack he could use the buster sword outside practice—and then grimaced as he realized he likely wouldn't be able to unless he got promoted.

The rest of the guys drifted over within the next ten minutes, and by 0800 all eight were assembled when Harke drove up in a standard military truck.

"Form up!" he called, and everyone stood a little straighter in line. "Good. We've got a pretty standard mission on the outskirts. A pack of fiends are bothering people out there. We're to take them all out, clean up, and head home. If you're lucky you'll make the burger dinner in the canteen."

Cloud saw Hyler's lips twitch a bit as he fought to smile at the promise of burgers tonight. Hyler had the most impressive appetite out of the whole squad, and whenever they ate at the canteen he consistently ate portions that would have filled Zack. Mako injection side effects manifested in a number of ways and that was the most harmless.

They piled into the truck, with Cloud careful to get in last so he'd be closest to the open back. He had no way of knowing how many mako injections it would take to be rid of his motion sickness, and he also had no desire to talk to anyone. Sitting on two benches facing each other, the guys sleepily regarded one another as Harke hopped into the front seat beside Youta.

"So was that you yowlin' last night, Aran?" joked one of the guys, nudging Aran with his boot as the truck started to move. Shinra Tower steadily shrank behind them through the gap in the canvas flaps.

"Shut your face, Mansel," Aran said, kicking him back harder. The lighthearted ribbing was typical between the two, as Cloud had learned over the last two weeks he'd worked with the group. Unlike Hyler, Aran was afflicted with a high libido after mako injections and was easily embarrassed by it, which meant he was teased as often as he was propositioned. The other man who had the same issue, Llyr, just liked to remind everyone that he was routinely getting laid when they weren't.

Cloud resisted the urge to shift uncomfortably as talk moved to whoever Aran and Llyr had found last night after their injections, sending Cloud's own thoughts back to dreams he'd been adamant about forgetting. Mako in general increased libido, though not always to the extent of Aran and Llyr, but… nocturnal emissions weren't uncommon among SOLDIERs who were abstaining. When Cloud wasn't reliving nightmares of experiments and fighting, his dreams were always of Sephiroth, and he was…

He shook his head, angry and slightly aroused just at the thought of the General. Sunday night's dinner hung like a pall over any thought of Sephiroth, but apparently it didn't extend to his dreams. It was thoughts like these that had let him get talked into that dinner and that were stopping him from doing what was necessary. Cloud had almost not shown up for the mission today simply because it did nothing for any of his goals. Too bad Harke had seen him in the hallway, and any punishment would be more bothersome.

Cloud had been aggravated since last night and hadn't slept well—and what little sleep he did get had been haunted by Sephiroth—so he was not in the mood for conversation when Xolis leaned over and poked him. "You alright?" Cloud turned his head farther away instead of answering. "I met your buddy Aaron this weekend, by the way." Xolis paused for a reaction, but there was none. "He's a pretty cool guy. He told me about what you did in the exam, and I'd swear he was exaggerating until his captain confirmed it—he was in the security room or something." The Third whistled in awe, drawing the attention of Llyr next to him. "I can see why the Lieutenant General's got an eye on you."

Cloud ignored their curious noises and questions to him until Xolis told the story. Thankfully the squad had gotten used to Cloud's surliness. In another life the blond might have been upset at the image he presented, but frankly he had a lot of other things to worry about. Sephiroth and Zack had reminded him last night that he'd somehow strayed _again_ from his promise to remain focused on what really mattered, and Reno had contacted him late last night to say he was back in Midgar. He had a lot of questions for the redhead, and it sounded like Reno had the same.

The truck eventually escaped the confines of the city and within an hour had made it into the desert to the north. When they finally stopped, everyone was quick to jump out and stretch their legs. Midgar stood in the distance like a looming mountain with a cloud of smog circling it.

"Alright! Two teams!" Harke yelled, and the group automatically split into their pre-assigned cells. Cloud was grouped with Youta, Xolis, and another quiet Third, Brandon, while Harke joined the other group. "You've got grids extending two miles in each direction," Harke continued, pulling out maps and handing them to the squad leaders. "You're looking for a pack of Kalm Fangs—abnormally large and aggressive. Estimates are between five to eight hounds."

Directions given and maps distributed, Harke dismissed them. Cloud's troop set out to the east. For the first two hours as the sun blazed its way across the sky they marched through the desert, sometimes stopping to check for signs of the Fangs or deal with various monsters that came their way. Cloud remained second to last in line, and as the day wore on he began to regret not ditching. All this marching left him too much time to ruminate on last night's dinner and how he managed to muck up everything he did.

Thus it was a relief when Xolis eventually called out "I think I found something!" He was crouched down on a small ridge of sand and weathered rock, looking at the ground.

The others gathered around to see the tracks he'd found. It was definitely the paw print of some beast, but no one was sure if they were the right ones. As Youta backed up a moment to check the map, Cloud leaned over Xolis to get a quick look.

"It's a wolf print."

"What?" Xolis asked, shielding his eyes as he looked up at Cloud.

"It's too wide and short to be a Kalm Fang. Probably one of the desert wolves that scavenge around." There was quite possibly no one more familiar with Midgar-area beasts than Cloud, who had lived out there long enough to deal with practically anything in the area. He also wasn't about to let his squad chase a false lead and waste more time in the desert.

"You sure?" Xolis asked, giving Cloud a squinty look, though it might have been the unforgiving sun that explained it.

"Yeah," Cloud said flatly, and turned and marched farther up the incline, finding more of the same prints scattered about like the animal had jumped from rock to rock to reach the vantage point.

There was a flurry of conversation behind the blond, and then the men opted to move out, following his lead. As Cloud turned away from the rocky ledge he thought he saw a lone wolf cutting across the desert in the distance.

It was another hour of scouring before finally the group stumbled on the Kalm Fangs. The beasts had burrowed in a hillside to escape the sun and remained hidden right as the Thirds walked by on top of the hill. Cloud was preoccupied with thoughts of the story of Gilgamesh and trying not to remember the look he and Sephiroth had shared, but he was still the first to feel the fiend's intent, moments before it lunged. Cloud jerked to the side and grabbed the hilt of his sword, but Brandon behind him wasn't so lucky.

The Fang bit the Third deeply in the shoulder and dragged him into the dirt. Brandon went down thrashing, unable to dislodge the Fang's jaws. Cloud pulled his sword free of the scabbard—another reason he didn't care for broadswords—just as the rest of the squad reacted.

"Get that thing off him!" Youta yelled, and before Cloud could move Xolis jumped forward and stabbed down with his dirk, driving the blade into the meaty shoulders of the beast. It howled and let go, and Cloud grabbed Brandon's good arm to drag him clear.

The Fang that had attacked was built like a wolf, but leaner, harder, and much bigger, with tufts of matted hair and jowls that didn't hide the full set of sharp teeth it sported. Its legs were thin and spry, and it seemed to shake off Xolis' attack like it was a fleabite.

"It's not alone!" hollered Xolis as two more of the Fangs rushed up the hill. They were growling fiercely and yellow saliva dripped from their mouths. Definitely more aggressive than normal; Cloud had seen their type around Midgar after Meteor, though some of those dwarfed even these oversized ones.

"Tight formation!" Youta called, but Cloud and Brandon were too far to the side to step into the group. Xolis was already drawing on his Cure materia to heal the injured Third, so Cloud stepped in front of Brandon, drawing the attention of a flanking creature. While intimidating and quick, Fangs weren't particularly smart and very susceptible to fire. None of those were things Cloud ought to know at this point though, so he let Youta take the lead in the attack.

Youta swung for the muzzle, sending the Fang snarling to the side as the other beasts dashed in to take Youta down. Xolis was already there though, interrupting the attack with a short slash to another hound's foreleg, crippling it for the moment. Behind him Cloud could hear Brandon groaning as the flesh knit itself together, and there were the sounds of teeth meeting steel and the howls and whines of the fiends.

The first three Fangs backed up as they realized their prey wasn't defenseless, but it was foolish to think the first scouts would be the strongest ones. The fourth and fifth Fangs that joined the fray were larger, their teeth were bloodier, and they were not afraid to lunge at the Thirds.

"Radio in!" yelled Youta to Brandon, who had the radio to reach Harke, as he dashed at the nearest Fang, aiming for the head and missing by inches as the thing twitched to the side and swiped with its claw. Youta took a bloody slash down his thigh as he rolled clear.

The Fangs were bigger and more coordinated than anticipated, but it wasn't beyond the abilities of the four Thirds. The nearest one to Cloud stalked toward him and he held his blade ready. Next to him, Brandon had finished the radio call and picked up his weapon, stepping in tandem with him. He was still moving gingerly with his shoulder, fearful of being injured again—an amateur's mistake.

Cloud darted forward when the Fang in front of him moved to attack, hitting the striking paw with the flat of his blade and knocking it to the side. The Fang rolled back on to all fours but Cloud was already moving, following up with a two-handed lunge that struck the side of the beast before it could complete its turn. The blade wasn't sharp enough to kill though, leaving a bloody gash in its side rather than spearing it through. Angry and desperate now, the Fang leaped at the blond. Cloud had fought hundreds of these Kalm Fangs before though, and easily sidestepped and swung down, burying the sword deep in the back of the neck.

He lifted his broadsword free with a disgusted heave. That attack would have guaranteed a beheading with any other sword he'd used before.

"Another!" Brandon yelled from behind, where he was struggling with his own beast. A sixth Fang had appeared, called by the baying and howling of the first attackers. With a swift glance Cloud took in the situation, seeing that only two creatures had been killed and the others were struggling to take down the rest. As he watched, Youta tried to stab the belly of one that jumped at him, but the Third didn't dart fast enough to the side and his bicep was clawed on the pass even as he dragged a shallow red line across the shoulder of the Fang. It was clear in just that handful of seconds Cloud watched that none of the other men had ever fought a fast, four-legged beast like this before.

He could watch all his squad mates get clawed as they wore down the beasts with nicks, he could take on all of them with his blunt sword, or he could resort to materia. It was an easy choice to make. Cloud calmly slotted the fire materia into the sole spot on the sword. Another Fang charged him and he swung his sword twice at it, making it back up into the one attacking Xolis.

"Fire!" Cloud called, trying to use as little energy as possible to hit the two Fangs now fighting beside each other.

A flare of light was momentarily blinding as the beasts' coats caught fire, but they both rolled and the flames went out almost as fast they'd been formed. Cloud must have been getting better at controlling the power of his supercharged magic because that had done almost no damage at all. Nonetheless, Kalm Fangs hated fire, and both fiends backed up from Xolis and Cloud looking wary.

"They're weak to fire!" Xolis was yelling as Cloud charged up another attack with more power. He'd never been good at precise measurements with MP though, so the second attack didn't do much damage either.

"Use Fire2, Cloud!" Xolis yelled, pulling out his Cure materia. Cloud looked around, realizing that he was the only one with a Fire materia.

Summoning more energy than he had anticipated needing, Cloud launched another wave of fire at the Fangs, this time catching four in total. The attack drained the strength from one and killed another outright. Xolis and Brandon jumped in to finish off the one he'd drained, and soon enough Cloud had hit all the Fangs with Fire magic. He took out another with a direct hit, and softened up the rest for his squad to kill.

Everyone but Cloud was panting in the end. That didn't stop any of the men from coming right over and congratulating him on his magic. Youta almost looked like he would pound Cloud on the back and then rethought it, instead laughing between breaths. "You gotta be out of MP by now, but damn Cloud. I'm glad you're not in the materia corps."

Brandon handed him an Ether, which Cloud took automatically even though he didn't really need it. While the rest went to secure the area and count the dead Fangs, the blond stared down with consternation at the slotted Fire materia glowing dully in the sunshine.

He'd killed two. Two out of six with magic. He, who had made a snowstorm with a pinky's worth of power, had only killed two fire-weak beasts with fire. It made him angry to think that he had either crippled himself by becoming accustomed to using so little MP for magic, or… or he was losing the ability .

Cloud wasn't sure which was worse.

* * *

There was a timid knock on the door that without enhanced hearing Sephiroth wouldn't have even heard.

"Come in."

The door cracked open and then widened, and his new secretary stepped in with a folder in her hands. She held it to her chest like a shield. "The file you requested, sir."

Sephiroth waved at his desk and she carefully deposited it without touching anything else, and then slipped back out the door like a ghost. He may have been a little sharp with her on her first few days, but if she couldn't deal with his sour moods then she wasn't climbing any higher up the corporate ladder. At least he didn't yell or throw things like Heidegger. He was just… blunt.

Or as Zack might put it: "callously eloquent of another's faults".

Putting aside thoughts of the new secretary, Sephiroth abandoned the droning report from Wutai—no notable protests or activity, one idiot Third who'd injured himself after discovering another Third wearing women's underwear, the usual rubbish—in favor of the new folder.

"Confidential Medical Report: Authorized Eyes Only" the cover announced in bright red. It had taken a lot of pushing and some unorthodox scaring of the science trainees on Monday before Sephiroth had been able to get this medical report. As the General it was well within his rights to request copies of the medical evaluations of his SOLDIERs, but that didn't mean the Science Department always wanted to comply.

Sephiroth flipped open the folder to a new official photo of Cloud Strife, this time sporting the blue fatigues of a Third Class. Instead of the rebellious, defensive look of his cadet photograph, Cloud stared down the camera bored. His hair was a bit longer, some of the spikes leaning dangerously towards floppy, but his eyes were still that startling blue—at least they would be until they started to glow.

In fact, that's why Sephiroth had requested this report. He was quite sure Sunday night he'd seen a bit of a mako shine in Cloud's eyes, which shouldn't have occurred after only two mako injections.

The first pages were standard medical evaluations, detailing blood type, blood pressure, family history—blank—and height and weight charts. There was an almost amusing note indicating Cloud suffered from white coat syndrome, which was no surprise to Sephiroth. Interestingly, at his second injection he'd grown an inch. SOLDIERs did tend to gain height and musculature with mako, not to mention Cloud was only seventeen and therefore still growing. That difference wasn't odd alone, not until Sephiroth flipped the page.

The results from the first mako examination had been on the high end, but nothing crazy. Sephiroth read through the charts and the bland comments from the administering nurse, trying not to draw conclusions until he'd read it all. Cloud absorbed mako at a high rate; the estimated mako rejection-to-assimilation ratio was low on his follow-up blood and urine tests. Low enough that the physician had noted it for closer monitoring.

The second injection also went smoothly and his numbers were just as high, which meant with strong levels of adrenaline, testosterone, and cortisol his eyes could reflect mako. Mako count in the bloodstream was also near the top percentile as were his muscle response, skin affectation, and sensory impulses. The follow-up again showed an exceptionally low mako-rejection rate. It wasn't a pattern to the scientists until the third test, but they didn't have the benefit of Cloud's background—or well, some of it.

A high absorption rate wasn't common, especially from a person who grew up in the area of a reactor. However, Zack was a similar outlier, and if Cloud maintained rates like this he'd be at First Class levels easily within a year —and his swordsmanship was already nudging well into Second Class.

What bothered Sephiroth was exactly how much of an exception Cloud was. Not only was he an above-average swordsman, but he'd also been experimented on by Shinra, possibly knew the three dangerous men on the western continent, had demonstrated familiarity and impressive adeptness with materia in his squad mission yesterday, and now absorbed mako at an astonishingly high rate as well. It was, in Sephiroth's opinion, a little too much to swallow.

_I'm missing a piece_ , he thought, looking down at the medical report; another file to add to the growing pile that all connected back to Cloud.

"You might wanna pull back on the whole magic thing," Reno drawled as sauntered into the empty conference room. He'd already activated the jamming device in his pocket that should keep any prying ears or wires from picking up their conversation. Sometimes it was awesome to be a Turk.

Cloud just shrugged, not even looking up. "It was taking too long."

Reno rolled his eyes before he could help himself, but he stopped halfway through. He hadn't seen Cloud in a few weeks because of the mission to Junon, but something in his countenance had changed… or maybe the blond had just spent too long brooding while waiting for Reno. "Yeah, and your Second and teammate both wrote glowing reports. You realize that shit gets recorded forever."

Cloud shrugged again, staring off into a corner. Sephiroth and Zack were already on to him; it wasn't like his materia ability was the key to any secrets. "Tell me what happened in Junon."

Reno hopped onto the conference table as Cloud leaned against the wall. He stalled, recounting all the sordid details of his boredom with patrols and annoyance with Heidegger and Tseng until Cloud lost some of that maddening stoicism to irritation, before finally getting into the fight itself. "There were about fifty total of those clones, all creepily pale with black wings. Didn't care one bit about their lives either."

"Did you see Genesis?"

"Naw, but Hollander got airlifted onto the damn cannon, and after that, who knows. All I heard was a bunch of guys got their asses kicked and he flew away. Reports on the clones don't specify how they were made, but there were no weird mutations or anything. Nothing about Jenova either." Reno picked at the buttons on his shirt. "Anyway, saw one suspicious guy running around Junon in a dark red cape. Had these weird gold boots too, but Dan said something about 'Carnelian' red—" Reno sneered contemptuously as he said it—"So it couldn't have been Genesis."

Cloud was still staring into that corner hard enough that maybe he thought Jenova would pop out. "Dark red cape and gold boots?" he finally murmured.

"Yup." He popped the 'p' on the end.

"That must have been Vincent." Cloud still looked bothered by something else, so he didn't see the incredulous look on Reno's face.

"Who the hell is Vincent?"

Cloud just glanced over for a second, but Reno wasn't going to be swayed that easily into a non-answer. The blond relented when Reno kept staring him down. "I told you about him," he sighed. "Former Turk experimented on by Hojo. I pulled him out of the Shinra Mansion. He used to be in AVALANCHE with me."

Reno gave a half-second's thought to asking more about this Vincent character if he was wandering around, but he had better things to talk about and Cloud's emotionless attitude was getting to him. "Speaking of the Shinra Mansion… a little birdie named Dan might have mentioned you, you know, _blowing it up_?"

"The Lost Number blew it up."

"And who let whatever-the-hell-the-Lost-Number-is out?" he shot back.

Cloud did that stupid shoulder shrug again. "I had to get rid of the books in the basement where Hojo kept his research. It was easier to let the beast out."

"And the sledgehammer to the reactor? Yeah, Dan told me about finding those remains too. You didn't tell me you went a little crazy redecorating your hometown!"

Cloud's distant gaze sharpened on him, almost as piercing as some of the General's looks. "How did Dan find that?"

Reno narrowed his eyes. "I'm not talking until you tell me what the hell you were thinking destroying a reactor and then hiding that shit from me. You realize that is the farthest from undercover you could go, short of leveling Shinra HQ?"

Cloud turned that burning gaze up about five hundred degrees until Reno looked away. He was a bit worried his jacket might be smoking .

"Jenova was supposed to be there."

"So what, she wasn't and you got pissed and tore it apart? And you said that bitch took you and a small army of the best to kill, and you just _went and tried to fight it by yourself?_ " Reno thought for sure he was the sanest person in their whole cadet class, what with Dan chasing after strange men in forests and now Cloud throwing temper tantrums and picking fights. "You're good Cloud, but not that good."

The blond's fiery stare quickly turned inward with contempt. Reno had just stomped on a touchy subject.

"She wasn't there," he repeated, voice flat and cold. It was a frightening tone Cloud only ever adopted when talking about that she-beast. "I thought Hojo moved her but—"

"I know, jeez," Reno muttered. He'd heard enough variations of this topic to last him the rest of his life and well into the afterlife. "I dug through every goddamn transport file and record I could find going back four months and got a big pile o' nothing." Reno did his best impression of his careless voice, but it never failed to unnerve him seeing Cloud go as cold as Sephiroth. Sometimes it was hard to reconcile the ridiculous chocobo-head cadet with this hardened warrior.

"She shouldn't have been moved," Cloud repeated again, like somehow saying it a hundred times would explain why he'd temporarily hallucinated the monster's disappearance in Nibelheim. "I can't think of why unless Lazard knew and told Hollander."

"Hollander was locked up," Reno reminded him warily.

"Genesis then."

Reno rolled his shoulders. "Well you might be right, but Genesis didn't move that Jenova thing then. Dan followed the ex-First like an idiot right up to the reactor _you_ had destroyed." Cloud didn't ask for an explanation, but his gaze on Reno was glowing a tiny bit now, which was frankly kind of freaky. "Yeah, Dan told me he ran into Genesis in the forest, apparently after he tried to follow you and got lost. Ended up following him to the reactor where Genesis threw a bitch-fit or something before running off. Said it was his mission and asked about Sephiroth and the exam."

Cloud's eyes narrowed but thankfully the heat of his gaze was toned down. It was a kind of menacingly thoughtful look as Cloud ran through a dozen ideas to explain Genesis' behavior.

"So Hollander doesn't have Jenova," Reno said leadingly.

"No, but he's looking," Cloud conceded.

"You said before he never found it," the redhead pointed out.

"That was before. If the timeline matched, then Jenova wouldn't have been moved and Genesis would never have checked the reactor. Someone told him where to look."

"And you're betting it's this Lazard dude." Reno could see the connection. Tuesti had said Lazard had run off after the investigation into the Science Department, so if he'd been fiddling around there he might have stumbled on to something. "What's his motive?"

Cloud's head cocked the barest bit to the side.

"Guy's gotta have a motive. Money? Power? Revenge?"

The blond somehow managed to frown without twitching any facial muscles. "I don't know," he finally said.

"Well you're not gonna get far finding him if you don't know that. I'll see what I can dig up." What Reno meant was he was going to see how much he could twist out of Reeve. He might have to knuckle down and ask the executive about Jenova, especially since Cloud was starting to look edgy enough to do something dangerous and stupid. "Any other news you wanna share with me? Besides making the General and his sidekick even more suspicious?"

Cloud sent him a slightly frosty glare for the jibe, but it lacked the strength of his previous looks. "They know I destroyed the mansion and reactor."

Reno jerked hard enough to slide off the table and had to right himself with the back of a chair. " _What?_ I was kidding, yo! If there's one thing you've been sayin' this whole time it's 'never tell the General' and 'Sephiroth'll snap and destroy the world if he hears a word,' so what the hell? O' course he's gonna be poking 'round the science department now that you pointed him straight there!"

Cloud pushed off the wall, clearly angry, but it was directed at himself and not at Reno. Cloud had cornered the market on self-loathing. "They've put too much of it together. I know I have to cut them off, but their positions are making it difficult."

Reno snorted derisively. "Yeah, it's not their positions. It's your love o' them—and not just your buddy Zack. I'm not an idiot; I've seen you making eyes at the General." Cloud actually colored a bit; just the barest blush high on his cheeks. Reno snickered, inwardly glad to see some of the human come back to the blond. "For the record, I told Dan if he got caught and thrown in jail you'd blow the General to get him out. I gotta keep my promises."

Cloud punched Reno fast enough to catch him off guard and topple him back on to the table. He swore loudly and cradled his stomach even though the blow hadn't hurt _that_ much. It had just knocked the breath out of him. "If that bruises, I'm totally spiking your juice at breakfast," he gasped. "Have fun practicing with your First when you're so high Wonderland seems normal."

Cloud ignored his whining with practiced ease. "If Vincent was in Junon he might be coming this way."

"Isn't that a stupid thing to do if he's a former Turk? Won't someone recognize him?" Reno asked as he massaged his stomach.

"He was a Turk about twenty years ago."

"So was Veld. He's back by the way." Cloud didn't react to the information though; he'd predicted Veld's return. "Well what now? Junon's been attacked and Hollander got away."

"Hollander and Genesis were both taken care of by Zack and Sephiroth."

"So we just magically wait for them to drop dead and _then_ do something?" That didn't sound like a plan at all, and while Cloud had been fine waiting for things to happen before, Reno was getting the sense the blond was growing impatient. Whatever conversation had resulted in the General and Lieutenant General learning about the mansion and reactor looked to have been the last straw and had driven Cloud out of passivity.

"No. Jenova is priority and we need to find her now. If Hollander and Genesis are looking for her too we might be at a disadvantage."

"And here I thought you could predict the future," Reno remarked sarcastically, and then automatically curled up a bit to protect his stomach at Cloud's look. "Okay, okay. I'll check out Lazard and keep my ears sharp. You keep… doing whatever the hell it is you're doing."

"I have to get stronger." Cloud grimaced as he said it because they both knew what the fastest method was. Reno had to get a handful of mako injections himself as a Turk, mostly for speed and resistance to damage, and those hadn't been fun in the least. He'd only gotten a tiny bit of mako compared to what SOLDIERs got. "I can't—" Cloud actually hesitated, starting and stopping for just a moment before his features settled into a grim look. "I can't let Zack and Sephiroth hold me back."

Yup, Zack and Sephiroth had danced on Cloud's tail for too long. Reno was tempted to find out what happened, but given how Cloud's eyes had glowed for a second there Reno didn't feel like trying. "You just better not steal some mako and ask me to give you injections," he joked more lightheartedly.

Cloud blinked slowly at Reno's offhand comment. His reflexive aversion to mako and labs had meant he hadn't even considered procuring mako outside the official injections. Those appointments were spaced roughly every two weeks so that the SOLDIER could become accustomed to the changes in his physique, but Cloud was in fact compensating for the _lack_ of mako. More frequent injections would speed up the process so long as he didn't poison himself…

The venture was incredibly risky, assuming he even got a hold of mako and syringes, but Cloud couldn't help turning it over in his mind, even as he recoiled from the idea of injecting _himself_ with mako.

_Only if it truly becomes necessary_ , he decided.

Reno watched Cloud as the blond's mind spun and felt something in his gut sink. "Okay, try not to do anything too stupid, and call me if you do," Reno said as he hopped off the table. He'd have to keep an eye on the blond if he could; maybe he'd underestimated the lengths Cloud would go—after all, the last time Cloud went on his own he blew up two buildings. "Oh yeah, one last thing." Cloud looked up from his moody contemplation of the floor. Reno rubbed the back of his head awkwardly. "Rude saw me talkin' with Dan, and you know the guy won't say anything, but he's a Turk…"

"Don't tell him."

"Aw man, I wasn't gonna tell him everything. Just a little pokin' and proddin'…" Cloud was still giving him that unmoved look that said with utter certainly he would happily stab Reno if he spilled too much. Better to just get it all out then. "Look, Rude's been a Turk for a long time, and he's discreet. I give him enough to chew on and he might even help. I give him nothing to chew on, and he'll probably figure some of it out for himself and make it worse." Reno paused for a moment, and then just figured _what the hell_ and said it: "Like how you gave the General nothing and now he's pulling teeth without anesthesia."

Cloud's look turned rather icy for a beat before the frost cracked. "Fine, but give as little as you can."

"Yes, sir," Reno mock-saluted, pleased. Cloud rolled his eyes, the most human he'd been the whole meeting.

"I gave Sephiroth and Zack something to bite on, by the way," he said casually. "Since they got the mansion and reactor figured out."

"See, you can learn," Reno shot back as he waltzed out the door.

* * *

Cloud was careful the rest of the week to maintain distance from Zack. They had training together on Wednesday that was both unavoidable and painful for Cloud. Zack hadn't said anything about Sunday's dinner, but he did ask some pointed questions about Monday's mission so Cloud knew he'd read the report. He also assigned a few exercises that tested resistance strength and endurance specifically. Cloud didn't let himself read into it, and just did his best to remain blank-faced. Zack didn't hide how it hurt his feelings, but he knew better than to address it directly.

It wasn't how Cloud wanted things to be with his friend, but he'd dilly-dallied enough.

The last two days at least meant training with the squad, and Cloud pushed himself hard enough to make breathing almost an exhausting exercise. The rest of the guys had gone out for drinks tonight, but even on a Friday Cloud was training. All his work didn't save him from a dream about Sephiroth last night though, his silvery hair pooled around Cloud's thighs and his mouth—

_Brring. Brring._

Cloud lowered the buster sword he was practicing with and resisting jamming it into the floor when he realized where his thoughts had strayed. Instead he roughly grabbed his PHS out of his bag. He glanced at the screen, prepared to ignore it if it was Zack, but instead it read "BLOCKED NUMBER".

The blond hesitated as he stared at the screen. A blocked number could be anyone, including Sephiroth, which made his hand clench tight enough on the phone that if he'd had a little more mako he would have broken it. It could be Reno though too, calling from a Turk line.

Not liking his own indecision, Cloud answered.

"It's me."

Cloud's grip on the sword relaxed for the first time in days it seemed. He glanced around the empty training room and spied a small camera in the upper left corner. No guarantee his PHS wasn't tapped either.

"Heard you were nearby."

"Regrouping," Vincent replied, being deliberately vague. Then he hung up as abruptly as he'd called. Vincent had never quite gotten the hang of phone etiquette. Not that Cloud made a good teacher either.

The blond trained until midnight with new vigor, mind on a loop of what Vincent had found that prompted him to come to Midgar. Had he found Jenova? Cloud flexed his hands and hoped so, even if he wasn't sure he had the strength to deal with her if she woke. Maybe he'd just steal a mastered Fire materia and burn her for as long and hot as he could stand? That is, if his magic ability remained as far above average as it had been…

Come Saturday, Cloud woke to catch the first train out in the morning so he could avoid everyone but the last, sleepiest, nightshift. At this point the other three Thirds he bunked with were used to his long hours, so none of them stirred when he dressed in the most casual uniform he had, tucked the dagger he'd gotten with Reno months ago into his boot, and left.

When he arrived at Aeris' church it was still covered in morning shadow, the stained glass windows dull without sunlight. The air in the slums was icy this early on a January morning, but at least one benefit of winter was how much less the garbage stank.

Cloud knew not even Aeris would be here this early. Vincent didn't sleep much though—he was as haunted as Cloud, if not more so, so it was no surprise to see the ex-Turk waiting quietly inside. He sat at the end of a pew in the shadow of one of the columns. With his dark hair and clothes he would have been easy to miss if he hadn't turned just a hint at the sound of the wooden door opening. Cloud crossed the creaking floor and joined him.

"You'll want to watch this," Vincent said without preamble. He handed over a small flash drive without explanation.

Cloud flipped open his PHS and connected the drive in the universal port. It took a few seconds to load, but then the black screen cleared to a fuzzy, grey security video of the main entrance of the Golden Saucer.

He hadn't known what to expect, but the moment Kadaj, Loz, and Yazoo crossed the screen Cloud felt a chill descend on him that stopped even the shudder up his spine. He watched as Kadaj confronted a guard and then became aggravated enough to lash out. His mako-enhanced strength was no match for a regular human, and the resulting clash was brutally short.

When the video cut out, Cloud just stared at the black screen.

_Another obstacle_ , she'd said.

_Your destiny is to be a hero_ , she'd predicted.

She'd said the very words in this church. Called him the one thing he wasn't and no longer wished to be.

Cloud gritted his teeth and took a deep breath. _So be it._

* * *

"It's been too long," Reeve said warmly as Reno kicked open the rooftop door.

"Yeah, I wouldn't recommend a holiday to Junon anytime soon."

Reeve smiled back disarmingly. He was wrapped in a thick wool coat with an austere green scarf that made him look startlingly sophisticated next to Reno's rumpled outfit and a slightly too-large jacket. He'd stolen it off a regulation soldier who had pissed him off one too many times as a cadet.

"You've gotten the official report from Junon, right?" Reno asked, moving to the railing to look down at the dark city. Midgar had a lot of lights, but the black steel it was made out of seemed to suck them all in.

"Of course," Reeve replied.

"Then you'll know half of it's bullshit."

"Most Turk operations seem to require… artful additions and omissions to any report."

"Well Hollander got out, and he had the help of an army of Genesis clones." Reno thought it was a fair to assume Tuesti already knew that.

"So they really were clones?" he asked mildly, like that kind of bizarre experimentation was an everyday thing for him. He _had_ been at Shinra for a long time though.

"No, just fifty identical copies of Genesis with wings." Reno replied sarcastically.

"I see…"

"The bigger question is why now?" Reno continued on, stuffing his hands into his sleeves. He hadn't thought to steal gloves. Maybe he'd swipe Tseng's the next time the man left his office. "Hollander's been there awhile."

"It could be a reason as mundane as lack of manpower or inside information," Reeve offered. Reno couldn't be sure if he'd said the last option on purpose of it was just a lucky break, but that was exactly the opening Reno was hoping for.

"Inside information like Lazard's? Ex-director of SOLDIER would know a lot of things." Reno maintained a casual voice even though they both knew that was anything but a casual remark.

"His information would be several months old," Reeve reminded him mildly.

"And how fast does the Science Department move?" Reno commented, and Reeve shifted in place and played it off like the wind has slipped into his jacket.

"Science takes time, as results have to be confirmed and duplicated before any policy or initiative can be implemented." It was a company line, which Reeve and Reno both knew. The redhead could have left it at that, but Reeve was obviously testing to see what he wanted to know.

"What about finished projects? Shinra got warehouses full of those?"

Reeve turned fully away from the railing to really look at Reno. "This isn't a normal line of inquiry for you. The Turks aren't usually involved in anything that isn't ongoing and sensitive."

"Well Lazard's desertion is _ongoing_ and _sensitive_ ," Reno diverted, glad he'd opened with that and not Jenova. He was still feeling out how far he could push about Hojo. Tuesti wasn't a bad guy for an executive, and he sure as hell beat Scarlet or Heidegger, but Reno had few doubts that stirring up Jenova would be like stirring up a hornet's nest—only the hornets had Hojo's needles.

"Ah," Reeve said knowingly, but Reno couldn't be sure if he'd bought the excuse. "So Lazard and Hollander? There were suspicions he was funneling information to the other scientist, but I was doubtful."

"Yeah?"

"Lazard was… a free-thinker. I admired him for his beliefs, even as he hid them to rise up the ranks."

"And what kind of free-thinking was he doing?" Reno asked, sensing Lazard's motive would be related to whatever Reeve said next.

Tuesti's gaze focused downward on the plate. "Tseng was perfectly aware of course, as most of us were in some way or another, that Lazard sympathized with the lower class people. He was also… not fond of the reactors."

Company grudge. That was the motive: revenge or a desire to destroy Shinra Co. Why Lazard would go through Hollander to do it was the unanswered question.

"I should think that would not be news," Reeve added in the silence that followed. He'd deliberately mentioned Tseng, indicating he knew perfectly well Reno wasn't officially in charge of the investigation.

Reno tried anyway. "He stole scientific info and then deserted. If he isn't with _Dr._ Hollander then where is he? Sittin' on a beach in Costa del Sol?" It wasn't a great diversion from Reeve's unasked question, and the executive looked nonplussed at the redhead.

"That would be the question to ask the Turks."

Reno shot him an un-amused look.

"The real question, Reno, is why you ask to begin with. I happen to know the two Turks assigned to Lazard's missing status and they are not you and your partner, Rude." Reeve's look turned a bit more piercing, but he had nothing on Cloud. "So what is it you're really asking about?"

Reno groaned at losing the game and leaned over the railing to spit. Here's to hoping it landed on Tseng's head.

"Nothing I think I can pay for," he admitted.

"Shouldn't I determine that?"

"Not if payment starts with the first word." Reno had to think a moment about how to approach this. "Alright, how about this? You tell me what you _really_ want from these talks, and I'll get down to what _I_ really want." Reeve paused, then calmly rested his elbow on the railing and leaned to the side so he could look at Reno more directly, but otherwise remained silent. "I know you don't agree with Shinra and I think these chats are your way of keeping tabs. And 'cuz you're bored."

"You aren't wrong," Reeve replied, and this time his ease was a little tenser than normal.

"But how far are you pushing to de-stabilize the company? Lazard just the tip of your iceberg?"

"Lazard, for all of his intelligence and acumen, was also one for bold measures. Most believe he wants to tear the company down starting from the top. He is the illegitimate son of the President after all."

Reno digested that anecdote—no doubt given free of charge because Reeve wanted to win him over a little—but that didn't answer the question. "So what? You want to remake Shinra? Without the Shinras and the sketchy activities? On the straight and narrow?"

Reeve looked Reno in the eye and straightened a bit. Reno's loyalties (mostly to himself) were easy to understand, and he had distaste for the company, but the redhead also had questionable ethics, along with ambition and cleverness that made him ideal for the Turks. But they also made him a difficult ally. However, Reno had already guessed most of Reeve's motives anyway and was still coming to these conversations, which meant Reeve still had leverage in terms of information. The Turks might hoard most information, but they didn't share it lightly even amongst themselves.

"Essentially yes. Shinra could only be changed from outside by the most extreme of events, but other than the people who benefit most, many insiders in Shinra are not much happier. We may have electricity and technologies only dreamed of a decade ago, but people signed away their freedom to a corporation they can't control. AVALANCHE represents the visible and extreme side of these feelings, specifically because of Shinra's propaganda machine, but there are plenty of grassroots groups that would see the company ended or accountable to the people."

It was a speech Reeve had never tested on anyone before, but there wasn't any incredulousness or skepticism on Reno's face.

"Anyone in the slums could tell you the same," Reno shrugged. "Everyone's got a gripe with Shinra, but with SOLDIER around no one's picking fights except AVALANCHE."

Reeve tucked that tidbit about SOLDIER away. He'd known on a logical level that SOLDIER frightened most would-be rebels away, but Reno had confirmed the importance of splitting the military branch from the company to win public support. No private group should ever own an army to begin with.

"So all those questions about Turk activities, SOLDIER stuff, and 'specially the slums you were just, what, feeling out the crowd? Your side and Shinra's side?" Reno sounded genuinely curious.

"I have insights as a member of the executive board within Shinra and have garnered a lot of sympathy and respect for being somewhat of an outlier among my peers. However SOLDIER, the Turks, and especially the working people are much harder to see," Reeve admitted. Reno had been invaluable in that regard, cutting through the illusions. He'd been the one to confirm what Reeve had suspected for years about Sephiroth's divided loyalties, though how he'd known some details about the General, Reeve was probably better off not knowing. "So I believe you have your answer. As for you, Reno, I know you are insatiably curious, and you've freely admitted more than once that knowledge is power. So tell me Reno, what secret do I know that you want?"

There were a dozen different things that came to mind when Reeve considered some of Shinra's most buried secrets. Shinra's entire company history was pretty much a lie on its face, and there were a hundred scientific, military, and energy projects that were shrouded under a hundred layers of confidentiality. He knew intimacies about board members and other major citizens of the world, and a lot of dark secrets that even he hadn't known about until he'd started asking the right questions recently.

"It's related to the Science Department."

Reeve nodded, not surprised. "They are the halls of many of Shinra's secrets."

"If I wanna get in there without being detected, how do I do it?" Reno asked frankly. He'd stopped looking angrily down at Midgar and switched to an arrogant stance.

"Would you be looking for some _thing_ ," Reeve said slowly, because Reno had been clear about _knowledge_ being power.

"Well I am looking for some _thing_ ," Reno replied surly. "But I'm pretty damn sure it'll be on a closed server."

Reeve didn't really need to consider much. The chances of Reno's actions bolstering the Science Department were slim, so whether it hurt it or didn't affect it at all, Reeve could still benefit from helping the redhead.

"Well… the upper science floors are mostly empty now. That's where Lazard breached a computer according to the Turk report, so there's nothing there. If you were thinking of accessing Hojo's files I couldn't help you with that, but the underground laboratory levels are reached by an elevator." Reeve watched the play of emotions across Reno's face. Some made sense and some didn't. "It would help if I knew what you were looking for," Reeve coaxed. He was curious now, more than he had been in a long time.

"An' I got a feeling if I'm gonna have to hack Hojo's own damn computer to find it, then I'd have to kill you before I could pay you," Reno replied, very obviously unwilling to tell.

Reeve had to seriously consider what he said next, because he'd had an idea. However, it would make him a much more direct player in all of this if he acted on it. There was risk to be sure, but the Science Department was the second biggest department of the company, with the military being the largest. Cutting that necrotic arm off the corporation one day was going to be difficult enough without some groundwork.

Reno was already starting to walk back to the rooftop access door when Reeve stopped him. "I may be able to help you, Reno, but you'll have to help me too."

* * *

A week after the dinner with Sephiroth and Zack, Cloud could say he felt both accomplished and somewhat miserable.

He'd successfully avoided the General and Zack for most of the week, even if he was currently reduced to hiding out in the pool changing rooms after one of his bunkmates had mentioned Zack swinging by asking for him. Cloud didn't trust himself to turn down an invitation to hang out with Zack or Sephiroth. He'd found it hard enough to put his foot down when it came to Tifa's requests.

He and Vincent had talked about a lot of things when he'd visited the day before, but once the topic of Hollander, Jenova, and the remnants had been exhausted, Cloud found himself unloading a few of his other worries on the ex-Turk. Vincent made an excellent listener, even if he almost never offered any comments or advice—at least until Cloud told him about that last practice with Zack.

" _I'm… distancing myself from them. I have to until Jenova is gone."_

_Vincent didn't respond, just leaning against the wall and staring down at the floor like he had for most of the conversation. Cloud found it easy to half-ignore him and speak; this way he didn't feel like he was going mad talking to himself._

" _I see… motives in everything they do. Zack asked me about the magic I did on the Monday mission. He tested me on reflexes, high-activity endurance, and raw strength. Before… I wouldn't have second-guessed him."_

_Vincent stirred for just a moment, drawing Cloud's eye to the tatters of his red cape. Yuffie had always thought Vincent had let rats nibble on it while he'd been sleeping under the mansion, but Cloud thought the cape looked more like it had been clawed by Galian Beast._

"… _Sounds like mako acclimation testing," Vincent murmured. "Have you checked your results?"_

_Cloud stared out across the pews to the front of the church thinking with dread of what that meant. He hadn't checked a single result of his mako tests, just assumed that no direct response meant nothing special. If something did come up though, then the experimentation he'd told them about would undoubtedly make them worry. Not enough to seriously call him before Sephiroth—one official order to see the General would have Harke dragging him there—but enough that they would want to keep a tighter leash on him._

" _Your eyes have a hint," Vincent said into his cowl. He wasn't looking at Cloud, but there was no doubt what he'd meant. This body may not have been the one Cloud had in the future, but it somehow hadn't forgotten mako either._

Cloud shrugged away the mess of emotions all those thoughts dredged up. He knew Zack and Sephiroth were worried about him, and both were hyper-attuned to any mako related deviations from the norm, but that meant he had to stay away all the more. They might try to get him to agree to more tests, or to be there at the actual injection, or worst… bar him from getting the injections to begin with.

The blond rocked to his feet from the slightly wet bench he'd been sitting on. He wasn't normally prone to pacing, but this time his boots splashed in the shallow puddles of the pool's changing rooms. He feared the terrible idea he'd had before was going to be necessary.

He wasn't strong enough to deal with Jenova alone if she wasn't totally comatose, and now he had the three remnants to contend with too. His magic ability wasn't as reliable as before, and Zack and Sephiroth were on to him anyway.

This idea was… incredibly dangerous, but he'd sworn to make whatever sacrifice was necessary to destroy Jenova before she destroyed half the world and all of Cloud's important people. Even if that sacrifice was injecting himself with his own nightmares.

Cloud pulled out his PHS and dialed Reno's number. It was Sunday night so that meant Reno _probably_ wasn't at a bar, but he wouldn't be surprised if the redhead had found his way there anyway.

"Yo, Department of Administrative Research. Thank you for joining our hit list, how may I help you?"

Cloud sighed. Reno spent much of his free time coming up with as many creative ways to answer the phone as he could—and did it twice as loudly in the office when he knew Tseng was around. How Reno and Tseng worked smoothly together in Cloud's future the blond didn't know, but in some of his darker moments he wondered if he'd unintentionally sabotaged their relationship.

"Yo, Cloud? I can feel the glare from here so you can stop now."

"I need to get into the labs."

Cloud could hear Reno groan on the other end. Then there was the sound of springs and two boots dragging on the floor. "Well at least you called me before you did somethin' stupid," Reno muttered to himself. "It's your lucky day, because I gotta go there anyway and I've got some help."

"Help?" Cloud repeated skeptically.

"Yeah, and didn't have to sleep with him either. Just promise to drop a virus in the science accounting computers—by the way, I got Rude to teach me how to scramble all my phone calls and I did your PHS too. And no, I didn't have to spill your whole life story. You're welcome."

Cloud didn't bother to verbalize his gratitude, but it did make him wonder for just a second what might have happened if he'd been smarter about handling Sephiroth and Zack. Then he promptly remembered that Reno had zero history with Rude yet, and Cloud knew too much of Zack and Sephiroth's history to ever treat them with equanimity.

"Meet me on the bottom of the exterior stairwell," Reno continued after waiting an inappropriately long amount of time for the thanks he wasn't going to get. "You know the one."

Cloud hung up and immediately headed to the training hall where the weapons were stored and grabbed his buster sword. One of his squad mates tried to flag him down, but Cloud ignored him and briskly left before anyone else could see him. He headed the long way around the cadet bunker so he didn't take a direct path to the side of Shinra Headquarters, arriving five minutes later at the very same staircase he and AVALANCHE had climbed fifty-nine floors before. Somehow the thing had lasted another five years before Cloud had raced up it with AVALANCHE, but it looked as rickety as ever.

The last thing Cloud expected to see as he rounded the front of the staircase was Cait Sith sitting patiently on his stuffed moogle. It jumped to life when Cloud came into view.

"Hello there! You're lookin' down! How 'bout I read your fortune! A happy fortune!"

Cloud stared at Cait Sith—no wait, Reeve Tuesti—as the robotic cat jumped eagerly around on top of the moogle waving its megaphone. He felt bizarrely nostalgic at first glance at the whole animatronic, especially at the offer of a fortune, and then almost as soon as he registered the nostalgia he realized how bad this might be. Reeve had been _spying_ on AVALANCHE in the beginning after all.

Cloud glanced at the ground hoping to see cigarette butts or something to indicate anyone else came around here, but there wasn't even much in the way of garbage. It was too late to walk away clearly.

"Aw come on! I've got a great fortune-telling machine, and while I can't promise good predictions it'll be fun! Whaddya say?"

"No thanks," he muttered, hoping Reno wouldn't take too long. Was this the help he was talking about? Was Reeve Tuesti getting involved directly this early on?

"Lemme be nice and give you one anyway!" Cait Sith declared, and before Cloud could even refuse the robotic cat was shoving a slip of paper into his hand. "Well, go ahead!"

Cloud sighed as he unfolded the paper. "Be careful of… forgetfulness. Your lucky color is green." The irony of the words was almost too strong. Cloud eyed the cat distrustfully, as though he could see Reeve through it. If Reno was working with Reeve this closely, then how much had the redhead told him?

"No, no, let me try again! That wasn't a good one. You'll see!" Cait Sith repeated the procedure under Cloud's harsh gaze and pulled out a second piece of paper. "Okay! Try this one!"

Cloud read this one reluctantly too. "What you pursue will be yours. But you will lose something dear."

He pinched the paper so tight it was liable to rip. This was the same fortune he'd gotten before when he'd first met Cait Sith, there was no doubt. Last time… _no. Aeris won't be involved at all. It must mean AVALANCHE. I have to give up AVALANCHE so there's never a reason to form it._

"Bad fortune?" Reno asked, openly snickering as he approached. Of course he would find it funny that Cloud, who knew the future, was getting offered his own fortune.

"No surprises," Cloud bit off. He couldn't help feeling unsettled though, since Reeve had told him years later Cait Sith's fortunes were randomly generated. To get the same two fortunes years apart… and two eerily correct ones made him very wary.

"So this is Tuesti's… uh, buddy." Reno introduced, waving at Cait Sith on the moogle. "Some kinda A.I. I think. He showed me before and my fortune told me to avoid raw fish. Guess I'm not stealing Tseng's lunch tomorrow. Anyway, I got a little help with the cameras—" Reno winked, so it was probably Rude. How he'd managed to convince the stoic Turk, Cloud didn't bother to ask—"And Reeve swears that as long as I scratch his back he'll make sure we can get in no problem. But we'll only have about five minutes, ten max, before someone gets suspicious."

That was plenty of time for Cloud, but he didn't say that. Reno eyed him warily nonetheless. "You gonna tell me what you're going down to the labs for or am I gonna have to guess?"

Cloud grimaced. "I think you can guess well enough."

"You're crazy," Reno swore, shaking his head. "You're gonna kill yourself or worse. They'll send your SOLDIER buddy after you."

Reno was striking too close to home. It was a huge risk what he was doing, and Cloud didn't even know if he would _be able_ to inject himself with mako. He might have flashbacks or a seizure at just holding the syringe. Angry and frustrated and unable to kill anything with his sword, he turned his searing look on Cait Sith.

"Don't look at me!" the cat yelped, waving it's hands in the air. "I gotta plead ignorance to the judge!"

"And what are you looking for?" Cloud asked, jerking his head at the cat. He hoped Reeve was watching on the other side and feeling suitably uncomfortable.

"Same thing you're hoping: to play Jenga with Shinra," Reno interrupted. "Look, Tuesti doesn't know what you or me are lookin' for so stop interrogating a machine. We got a minute 'til the cameras start their loop, and we don't wanna miss that."

Things really were accelerating, Cloud thought as they started walking, the moogle doing its strange hop. First Lazard's disappearance and now Reeve's morality rearing its head. Cloud couldn't be sure how all of those factors would react after Jenova was gone—if they did at all.

Cait Sith led the way through the fire door—which Reno had dismantled the alarm on—and through a side corridor to a small elevator. "There's two elevators, but _this_ one's the slow one. Most employees don't use it because it's so slow," Cait Sith was saying. Reno was looking over the whole corridor.

"Funny, this is part of the exterior wall on the blueprints," he said drolly.

"You don't actually believe those do you?" Cloud replied, still eyeing the cat and moogle. There was likely more to the virus Reeve wanted Reno to insert into the computer system, which Cloud would be sure to ask Reno about afterwards. If Reeve was aiming to remake the WHO out of Shinra, then Cloud wasn't going to get in his way. The Science Department would have to come down anyway.

The elevator dinged forlornly as it arrived, and the light inside flickered ominously before it finally decided on staying lit.

"SOLDIERs first," Reno said with a nudge, and Cloud stepped in before the other two crowded after. Cloud stood at the front just in case anything came through the door, and the overhead light sputtered as the elevator started to descend.

Cloud watched the numbers on the cracked glass count down:

Ground Floor

.

.

.

Basement Level One

.

.

.

Basement Level Two

.

.

.

Basement Level Three

.

.

.

U1


	36. Poisoned Veins

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cloud's got another mako exam or two lined up, while across the world more than he knows is changing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Writer's Note: Writer's block is quite possibly the bane of my existence. Thank you everyone who showed me lots of support and patience. And thank you to my amazing beta who really cleaned this chapter up!

The fluorescent lights in the hallway cast garish shadows as Cloud led the way out of the elevator and down the hall. They trooped as quietly as a hopping moogle and two booted soldiers could, Cloud reading name marker after name marker, looking for anything promising. He doubted he would find much; most of this section was comprised of dark offices and filing rooms, many that probably hadn't been touched in years as Shinra's experiments became less and less publically-acceptable.

They reached a four-way intersection within the first minute, and Reno stepped out first in case someone spotted him. As a Turk he was less likely to be questioned. "No one around," he confirmed at a glance.

"It's late, so the upper floors should be quiet," Cait Sith explained in a loud whisper. It carried down the corridor, making Cloud's hair stand on end more than usual. Reno's mouth opened to harshly chastise the robot but Cloud interrupted because he was counting seconds in his head and they only had ten minutes to pull this off. Less, if they had to make excuses to someone who overheard them. "I'm heading left. Meet back at the elevators in seven."

"You're not gonna… do it now, are you?" Reno looked uneasily at Cloud after a quick glance at Cait Sith. Bu the cat didn't seem overly interested, looking instead at the directory on the wall. According to the board, main offices and research terminals were to the right, and storage units and SOLDIER supplies were to the left.

"Seven minutes," Cloud repeated, giving Reno a look to remind him he wasn't _that_ crazy. He wasn't going to inject himself anywhere that wasn't remotely secure—not with his propensity for vivid hallucinations.

"Where're you goin'?" Reno said as Cait Sith starting bouncing off down the middle path.

"Blueprints," it answered before heading off. Cloud exchanged a nod with Reno before turning left and breaking into a jog.

The bland office walls didn't change, but large viewing windows and glass doorways started to appear as he left the office area. Most of the marked cabinets inside the rooms he passed were for generic chemical compounds and nutritional supplements—nothing dangerous or questionable on the surface, but mako had a finger in every pie of the science department. There would be some around for easy access, especially since SOLDIER injections were continuously ongoing. Cloud figured he should look for cold storage, probably something with a lock.

It was almost deathly silent as he continued down the corridors, following signs that pointed toward more actively used storage areas. The lights were dimmed and machinery popped and sputtered as automatic systems cycled, setting off his heightened senses.

He almost walked into a room occupied by a scientist working over some test tubes in a connected lab but managed to catch himself in time. The man was squeezing worms that looked like miniature Experiment No. 115s into a number of test tubes. Some smoked up in acid, others wiggled frantically before eventually ceasing to struggle, and others had no visible effect at all. After each test the scientist jotted down his results before repeating.

Timing it for when he took down his notes, Cloud ducked beneath the window and darted past the door, until he was no longer in danger of being seen. He could just hear the sound of glass tapping as one of the experiments flailed in its last moments, but the scientist remained eerily silent. If there were a few scientists still here he would need to be extra careful—and he had just five minutes left on the clock.

Two more rooms were useless but Cloud's instinct proved right when he peeked into the last room on the corridor. A woman in a lab coat was inside, and as he watched, she opened up a large refrigerator and pulled out a tray of glowing vials of mako. She counted the tubes and wrote the number down on a datapad before pulling out more trays.

When she turned to a second fridge, Cloud slipped inside the room and ducked behind one of the lab tables. He had to hold a hand over his hair to press the uncooperative stalks down so she wouldn't spot him.

Two more times she turned back to the fridge. Each time, Cloud drew closer until he was able to lock an arm around her neck and cover her mouth with his hand. Vincent had taught him this chokehold; he just had to be careful not to hold it too long. Cloud didn't like scientists, but he didn't like killing either.

As soon as she stopped kicking, he set her down gently on the ground. Her pulse was strong and steady, and she would only be out for three or four minutes before enough blood returned to her brain. That was plenty of time to get this done and get out of there still. Cloud hoped it was just the chill of the labs that was making his hair stand on end.

The fridge was still unlocked and inside were rows and rows of mako tubes glinting in the artificial light, cold air curling around them. To his relief the trays were marked with either "2nd" or "3rd" in red pen—good signs these were earmarked for SOLDIERs. Each tray had twenty-four tubes labeled in shorthand that could have denoted anything from concentrations, to dosages, to enhancement types. He didn't have time to figure it out, so he pulled out a tray sitting above eye level and took the first six tubes.

Cloud stuffed the vials into individual pockets so they wouldn't clink, imagining for just a second he could feel the mako burn even though the glass and his clothes. He had to shake away the thought as he quickly picked up the scientist's datapad and adjusted the count to reflect the ones he'd stolen before leaving the room. Someone would eventually notice the missing mako, but that would buy him time to at least get rid of it. He only had two minutes until he needed to meet the others, so he used less caution than was probably smart to reach the four-way intersection in time. He arrived to hear Reno cursing the absent Cait Sith.

"He left a _note_ in the middle of the hallway! What if someone else had come through before us?" Reno snapped in a hiss without greeting, waving the paper at Cloud. "Also, do you have any idea what they're paying Hojo? Because it's absurd, that's what."

Cloud ignored Reno's outrage as they quietly hustled back to the elevator, Cloud's senses almost painfully sharp as he listened for any sign they'd been heard.

"Where did Cait Sith go?" Cloud asked under his breath. What was Reeve up to?

"What?"

"The cat and moogle?"

Reno narrowed his eyes momentarily, before rolling them. "Guess you already knew him then. He's staying; at least that's what the note says. Swears up and down not to talk about us, blah blah blah." The elevator was still on their level, a good sign, and Reno stuffed the note in his pocket as they stepped in. "As for me, I planted the virus but had to take out some lab assistant."

Cloud's eyebrows went up at how nonchalant Reno sounded, at least until the redhead produced a depressed hypo. "Nifty Turk trick: causes ten-second amnesia, so even though she saw me she won't remember." Reno shrugged, putting the syringe away.

Cloud's eyes followed it, contemplating where he could get his own. Unclean ones could be easily found in the slums from drug addicts, but mako wasn't a guarantee against all forms of disease.

"I've got a thumbdrive of data to go through now. How'd your end go?"

The lights flickered ominously for a moment as the elevator ground to a halt and opened back onto the ground floor of Shinra HQ. Reno glanced at his watch and smirked. "We still have forty seconds until the loop ends. Solid cover period."

"Got what I came for." Cloud replied flatly as Reno reassembled the alarm system on the fire door they'd used to enter.

"Think the mess with the drugs when we were cadets was over something similar? Maybe Lazard wasn't careful and nicked some."

It was possible but Cloud couldn't be sure. He still didn't know why Lazard had injected himself with Angeal's cells, but at least straight mako wouldn't degrade him the same way.

"Either way we came in and out clean—other than the robot cat. I'd call that a successful infiltration."

Reno didn't seem to find their uncanny luck in the labs strange, but for Cloud the mako burning a cold hole in his pocket reminded him that nothing ever went as smoothly as he wanted.

* * *

Monday too went well for Cloud, and even though the hidden mako was like a palpable presence under his bunk, he felt lighter than he had in weeks. Stagnation in the face of adversity wasn't Cloud's style, but he hadn't realized exactly how much waiting around had affected him until now.

Waiting wasn't Zack's style either, and the First was quite fed up with the invisible wall Cloud was trying to build between them. Sephiroth had tried the same trick before, so Zack wasn't discouraged.

Despite being a generally boisterous person, Zack could be pretty sneaky when he wanted to be—he didn't get to be Lieutenant General because of his good looks or buster sword skills alone. He'd staked out the hallway outside the training hall waiting for Cloud, who was conveniently lost in his own world. Zack snuck up behind the blond and quickly slung an arm over Cloud's shoulders. He was ready for the elbow that tried to nail him in the gut.

"Whoa whoa, it's just me. Scared you, did I?" Zack smiled, not surprised at Cloud's reaction. Zack had surprised Sephiroth once similarly and his hair had been lopsided for a month. Good to know Cloud wasn't quite that dangerous. "I'm having a bit of a get-together tonight and you're coming. You've been way too gloomy and you've _definitely_ been avoiding me and Seph."

"I'm busy."

"Bullshit," Zack said cheerfully. "Your captain's gonna be there, so I _know_ you don't have squad practice. You can set aside your own training regimen for one night. And Seph is gone on a mission, so before you ask, you don't have to worry about making goo-goo eyes at him. Speaking of which, I really ought to lecture him about your fragile heart."

Cloud huffed, a bit embarrassed, but refused to whine Zack's name at the teasing. It was hard to deny the fact that even though Zack was picking fun at him, he was only doing it out of worry. Nonetheless, even with Sephiroth gone, there was no guarantee that Zack wouldn't want to talk about everything Cloud was trying to avoid.

"I'm not talking."

"You don't have to. We're watching TV."

* * *

Five minutes before eight p.m., Cloud was standing outside Zack's apartment door seriously considering just turning around and hiding out in the pool locker room again. He could hope that Zack's other guests would keep the First from coming to find him but Cloud was already feeling guilty enough. Tomorrow he had another mako injection scheduled, and he had already worked out how to ditch Zack for it. With that thought, Cloud sent one glance down the empty hallway before knocking on the door and being dragged into an automatic bear hug.

Zack's idea of a small get-together was clearly erroneous. There were about fifteen SOLDIERs, all First and Second Class, gathered together in front of his flat screen. It was possibly the most sophisticated technology in the apartment, since Planet knew Zack's fridge was at least fifteen years old.

Even though Cloud only knew some of the SOLDIERs by sight—excluding Harke, but he was Cloud's CO, which made it a bit awkward—his hope to melt into a corner and be forgotten failed. The group was full of conversation, especially during the commercials, and Zack and various others kept trying to draw Cloud in. He'd never seen the TV show they were watching—he'd really _never_ watched TV, actually—but that didn't stop people from demanding his opinion in various debates.

"The whole drinking urine thing was done three seasons ago and now they keep beating the dead chocobo with the idea," one First complained while an egg was chased by some toilet paper on screen. A grating jingle played in the background.

This was why Cloud didn't watch TV.

"You saw the water test! That stuff isn't drinkable! So what _else_ are you gonna drink in a crisis that's sanitary and has enough water in it? It's just common sense," argued another First. The two bickered loudly right at Cloud's feet, sitting back against the couch. Cloud was pressed up against Zack, who had managed to squish four SOLDIERs on a couch that was really only meant for two.

"It's tripe, that's what. Right, Strife?" A heavily freckled First looked up at him, and Cloud blindly nodded. "See! He doesn't even have a TV and he knows that the urine thing is so overdone."

"It's a survival show. There's only so many ways to get water if it isn't raining! And they didn't win the last challenge for the purification tablets," responded the Second next to him.

"Look, I'm willing to buy it being overdone in a wasteland, but they're in the damn tropics! Break open a coconut or something!"

The two Firsts continued to argue and they weren't alone in their outrage. The survival reality TV show had all fifteen SOLDIERs up in arms, including Zack, who was waving his arms around in some kind of visual demonstration of how to flag down a ship off the coast.

Cloud made an attempt to get up but changed his mind when Zack leaned back to emphasize some other point, putting most of his body weight on top of the blond. It was enough to stop him, and Cloud didn't think for a second Zack hadn't done it on purpose.

In fact, he wasn't allowed to escape until midnight rolled around and all the arguments had, for the moment, petered out with everyone agreeing to disagree. They'd watched another crime show after the reality one that devolved into bets over who committed the murder. (It was the lifeguard, and Zack won a fifty gil coupon to a bar.)

"Friendly group, huh?" Zack asked good-naturedly when everyone had left, some still ribbing each other in the hallway for seriously thinking the waitress could have stabbed that guy sixteen times. Cloud was sitting on one of the bar stools looking annoyed and just waiting to be roped into helping clean up.

"Why did you invite me, Zack?"

"Because socializing is good for you, and you don't scare them the way Seph did when I invited him that one time. Though they might have been terrified because that was right after that board game incident and he'd been pretty harsh with the punishments." Zack paused to remember that episode.

Cloud sighed and rubbed his eyes. "I'm leaving now. Technically it's past curfew and I've got training tomorrow."

There was a pause where Cloud was sure Zack was going to say something about his attitude, but he surprised Cloud by not mentioning the behemoth in the room. "I'll see you tomorrow at your mako exam—1000 sharp. You don't show and you can bet I'll have every First and Second looking for you. There will be search parties."

"Yeah sure," Cloud mumbled.

Zack mussed his hair up like always, leaving Cloud with a lot of doubts and self-loathing as he left the apartment.

* * *

It was with a lot of regret that Cloud showed up for his mako examination the next morning. He'd had Reno switch his time and was now one of the first to go at 0800 on the dot. Cloud spent the injection looking at the dosages on the mako tubes and the size of the syringes in order to estimate what he'd need to do it himself. It helped that he was distracting himself with those details instead of worrying about how dangerous his plan was.

Reno had sent him a brief message with a thumbs-up the morning after switching the time. At least this way, Cloud would have a chance to ride it out alone. If he could make it through the side effects of the injection by himself, then he could meet Zack in two hours and just take a long nap without spilling anything catastrophic in the throes of delirium.

Cloud divorced himself from how his deception would further taint his friendship with Zack and focused even harder on the corner of the lab room while the nurse swabbed his arm and slid the needle home.

It was with tingles running up and down his arm that Cloud walked out of the exam room minutes later. He rode the elevator down, periodically shaking out his left arm in the hopes that the sensation of mako burning in his veins would go away. He was so focused on getting to the materia practice rooms and lying down on the cool metal that he didn't have time to react to Zack waiting outside the elevator. Without the recent injection Cloud might have remembered to press the button to close the doors, but unfortunately he froze, and Zack grabbed him with an iron grip and propelled him out the door.

"I see you had an earlier booking," Zack said brightly, like they'd both planned this. "Next time, I'm gonna have to tell the nurses to hold you there since you keep trying to slip out."

That wasn't a light threat, since many of the nurses and assistants were specifically trained to deal with unruly test subjects. For each vitamin-D deprived one that injected him, there were three burly ones nearby.

The tingling up his arm was spreading into his chest, and Cloud felt rather like he was suffering heartburn throughout his torso. Except that heartburn didn't normally make the edges of his vision go fuzzy or his skin itch.

"I'm fine, Zack," he said as coherently as possible. "I don't want to- I just need to lay down."

"Right, in my apartment," Zack agreed, steering him with sure strength. The mako hadn't infused itself to his muscles yet, so Cloud didn't have the ability to fight back.

They made it to Zack's apartment, but the mako-burn was creeping up Cloud's spine and starting to really affect him. Zack's image beside Cloud steadily flickered between his rougher, leaner, post-Nibelheim self and his more boyish looks of the current time. Either way Cloud knew it was still Zack, and he had to remind himself several times where he was and which Zack he was with.

"Do you have any idea how pissed I was when I got Tseng's call?" Zack said, smile slipping off his face as the door shut behind them. Cloud was leaning on him more heavily now but he resisted going to the couch. Instead he slumped against the wall and opened and closed his mouth like he was trying to speak and had forgotten how. Zack sighed and swallowed his anger for the moment. "You itchy? How's your skin feel?"

"I'm not itchy," Cloud slurred a bit and then blinked rapidly until it was the right Zack in front of him. "I need to be alone."

"Like I said," Zack continued on, propping Cloud's hand on his shoulder to maintain the blond's balance as he tugged off Cloud's combat boots. They were steel-tipped, so it was likely more a precaution than for Cloud's comfort. "Tseng called me to say that your buddy Reno was poking around the labs' scheduling system. It was quite a surprise to hear your _ten o'clock_ appointment—and I checked Seph's office for the original time sheet—had been moved to eight."

Zack sounded annoyed as he talked, but sometimes he also sounded forcibly cheerful like he had in the yellow truck when he talked to Cloud, and the words would change mid-sentence. Cloud had to shake his head to try and make the world stop sliding around. _No, I'm not there. I'm in Zack's apartment. He's mad at me._

But even as Cloud thought it, the sentiment didn't quite reach him in the haze. People could be mad or happy, love him or hate him; it didn't matter. He'd done the right thing, even if it had destroyed Midgar and cost thousands of lives. Jenova would have taken more.

 _No…_ said a weaker voice, but the mako had left his toes burning, so it had surely reached his brain too.

Zack watched as he lost Cloud's attention entirely and wondered if Cloud realized how bad these hallucinations actually _were_. Didn't he know that Zack could be trusted with anything when it came to his friends?

"Hey Cloud, it's me, Zack. We're in my apartment, remember?" Awareness wasn't returning to that empty blue gaze, but mako was starting to tinge it. It was flooding Cloud's system and temporarily heightening all of his senses and abilities—and unfortunately triggering a mental reaction, it seemed.

"Come on, Cloud," Zack repeated coaxingly, standing up to hold Cloud by the shoulders and look at him squarely. The blond blinked a few times rapidly, like he was fighting for coherency. He looked almost like he'd been overexposed to mako with that vacant stare, but then his pupils contracted and for a moment Cloud seemed semi-aware.

"Zack?"

"Yup, come on, want to take a bath? Or… wash off in the ocean?" Zack tried, remembering Cloud mumbling about that before.

"The ocean…" he repeated, looking around like he might see it here. "Where's the submarine?"

"Submarine?" Zack repeated a bit dumbfounded.

"I mean… argh," Cloud almost violently rubbed his hands down his face, like he could feel the hallucination crawling on his skin. Some SOLDIERs did react to the itchy sensation badly, rubbing their own skin raw, so Zack was quick to grab Cloud's hands before he could hurt himself.

"What are you seeing Cloud? Talk to me," Zack encouraged, trying to sound soothing. He couldn't stop the hallucination but he might be able to help if he could work Cloud through it. But the blond jerked his head away almost violently and tried to pull free of Zack's grip. The First tightened his hold on him since he was afraid Cloud would only hurt himself. "It's me, Cloud. Zack, your friend."

"Let go of me!" he snarled, and because Zack had both his hands busy he couldn't quite dodge the knee that tried to nail him in the crotch. Sidestepping didn't save his femoral artery though, and he stumbled to the ground with a groan. His thigh was going to be black and purple.

He had one of Cloud's hands in his grip still, but he felt Cloud do some kind of fancy twist and then _snap_.

Zack cursed out loud at the feel of the bone breaking, but he'd been in war and knew how to disassociate from the pain. His hand flopped forward unnaturally, but there wasn't time to splint it. Cloud's flailing attempt for freedom had knocked Galatine off the table and Cloud was staring at it entranced.

" _Shit—fuck—damnit_ ," Zack cursed, but in the moment it took him to stand Cloud was holding the buster sword. Zack had left it half-polished on the coffee table after morning training when Tseng had called. Damn him and his terrible timing.

"Give me the sword, Cloud," he said, suffusing as much authority into his voice as he could.

The blond ignored him and lifted the blade up and drew the buster sword level with his chest, holding it poised. That was a stance Zack hadn't taught Cloud yet because he didn't have the necessary strength for those moves—and Zack had _invented_ that style. How did Cloud know it? "Put the sword down, Cloud."

"No." Cloud swung and Zack threw himself flat to avoid the blade. Luckily Cloud seemed to have some sense of the walls otherwise he would have eviscerated the kitchen counter, but he did gouge the ceiling on the upswing.

Zack rolled on the ground and sprang to his feet on Cloud's right side, aiming to disarm. But Cloud swung the sword down in a sharp arch, though this time his enemy was apparently standing on Zack's left, because he followed up with a straight stab into empty space.

Cloud sliced through the middle of one of the soldiers, the man collapsing to the ground face first. None of them would get near Zack, not as long as Cloud could stand. Those soldiers and Turks would not desecrate his best friend and savior lying on the ground _dead_.

"Get away from him!" Cloud nearly growled, thrusting with the blade straight at Zack this time, and the First had to jump to the side to avoid the sword. The blond looked almost desperately angry, fighting off a hoard of enemies only he could see. With a sickening pang in his stomach Zack thought he might know what this was about. Nonetheless, he couldn't let Cloud continue to play out the memory—if it was this ruinous to him now it might break him to relive it again.

Zack tucked his broken wrist into his chest and waited for an opening. He had to wince as the tip of the sword dragged through the arm of the couch, spilling stuffing all over the floor and cutting a neat hole in the corner of the wall. At least all his posters were in the bedroom so nothing of true value was being damaged.

After Cloud had disemboweled at least three more of his illusionary demons—and sliced two of Zack's barstools in half —he turned and seemed to 'see' Zack again. Or at least his eyes followed Zack's movements. "Cloud?" Zack asked warily. Cloud swiped the blade at him in answer. He had to dodge a few more times—sometimes narrowly because Cloud was definitely moving at a speed that could rival a Second—before he saw his opening.

He ducked the next swing that went high and lunged in to grapple, knowing from his own experience that the buster sword was nearly useless once an opponent was that close. Cloud was surprisingly quick even here, nearly head-butting the First, except Zack's strength and enhancements saved him. He twisted aside and tried to reach for Cloud's hand with his undamaged one, but the blond was fast and wily. He slithered out of Zack's hold and planted a foot firmly in Zack's stomach propelling him back six feet into the kitchen counter.

The blond was panting, and Zack seriously lamented letting Sephiroth leave on a mission before Cloud's injection. It was hard to disarm an opponent using only one hand without also hurting them, and Cloud was a lot more efficient with the buster sword than Zack had anticipated. The back of Zack's head throbbed a little, and if he were anything less than a First he'd probably have been concussed from that blow. As it was, he now sported a bruised thigh, broken wrist, and a long slice up his arm from when he'd sailed past the blade.

Cloud was still staring at him with the sword up, but he hadn't moved to attack. That was a good sign at least.

"Hey Cloud, it's over. Come on, you can put the sword down now."

Not a flicker of response.

Zack slowly raised his one good hand to show he wasn't going to attack anymore. Maybe if he pretended to surrender Cloud would stop. Since he was leaning against the counter, he slowly slid down, trying to either look like a dead enemy or a frightened one. If Cloud would just let go of the sword, this would be a lot easier.

Slowly Cloud's hand on the sword lowered until the tip almost dragged on the ground. "Zack?" he said disjointedly, and looked behind him at the floor near the wall. Zack was sure he was seeing a body of a loved one there. "I'm the proof that you existed."

Zack jerked a bit on the floor, accidentally twitching his wrist and sending a bolt of pain up his arm. "You can't live for someone else, Cloud," he said from the floor. At first he was worried Cloud might try to finish him off, but he just moved that numb expression on to Zack.

"I have to until she's gone. Otherwise it'll happen again."

"Who's gone? What will happen?"

Cloud didn't answer though, just turned back toward the invisible body and slammed the tip of the buster sword straight through the floor.

"Aw shit," Zack muttered; one more thing to fix, but he was more relieved to see Cloud let go of the hilt and look around himself. That is until they both jumped at the sound of a shout.

"What the fuck, Zack!" yelled Jax, clearly audible from downstairs.

That seemed to clear away the illusion. Cloud stared at the sword confusedly for several blinks before he transferred his gaze back to Zack, looking bewildered at the sight of him sprawled on the floor. Cloud's eyes no longer glowed.

"What happened?" he croaked, aiming for no inflection and missing by a mile. There was no way he couldn't see Zack's swollen wrist cradled against his chest or the streaks of blood on his arm.

"You were hallucinating. I think it was… someone's death."

Cloud didn't elaborate, but his eyes did flicker from the broken wrist to the cut arm and back up to Zack's face. There was anguish and fear as he looked at Zack, and then more self-loathing than the First had ever seen on his face. Zack sat up and made sure not to look at all pained about it.

"I'll be fine. Clean it up, set the bone, and it'll be healed in three days. And it's not even my dominant hand."

"I did that to you," Cloud said in an oddly dead voice. " _I did that to you_."

"You thought you were being attacked. You were… somehow you were using stuff I haven't shown you before."

"I thought you were…" Cloud turned his head away without explaining. He was white-faced and tight-lipped.

"Trying to take your teacher away?"

Cloud stared at the floor. He could still see Zack's body laid out riddled with bullets and the Turk that had declared him brain-dead with mako poisoning. He remembered wanting… wanting to cut them all down, to stop them erasing Zack from existence.

It wasn't real. Those were _Zack's_ memories fighting of wave after wave before the gunfire. Cloud had been… he'd been weak and dazed; he hadn't been able to help Zack at all.

He barely registered Zack standing and reaching out slowly to touch his arm. "Cloud—"

"Let me go."

"Cloud, what did you see?" Zack asked, looking at the bare spot Cloud had been defending. "Look at me Cloud." The order worked at least, but Cloud's gaze inevitably went down to the broken wrist. "I've been training a long time and I've gotten worse. Do you think Seph hasn't done the same? That _I_ haven't to another SOLDIER?"

Cloud didn't answer. _I did that to you,_ he had said. His response seemed out of proportion to a common mishap between powerful fighters, but Zack had learned a few things from Sephiroth.

"You're not a monster, Cloud."

"I could be," Cloud replied, thinking of Jenova and the emptiness of the puppet he'd been, how easy it was to erase his identity over and over again.

* * *

"I hurt him."

"He's a First, he can take it."

"I broke his wrist, bruised his femoral artery, cut his arm, and wrecked his apartment. I'm dangerous and so is Jenova." Cloud was glowering at Reno's bland brown coverlet while the Turk took apart his PHS looking for bugs. He'd been quite unhappy to hear Tseng was monitoring his computer with some backdoor or bug he hadn't found yet.

"Yeah well, most SOLDIERs are too. The guy is also friends with the General, you know," the redhead said offhand. "And I can guarantee he doesn't hate you because that's the third SOLDIER who has tried to take the elevator up here. Don't those meatheads have something better to do?"

Reno pointed a finger at the fuzzy video feed from the elevator, which at a glance showed a Second stepping off looking confused. Reno had taken the old motherboard from the SOLDIER exam and repurposed it to block anyone taking the elevator to Reno's floor. No one had tried the stairs yet otherwise Cloud would have been bodily dragged to the one-on-one session with Zack he was currently skipping. Cloud was sure Zack would be here personally once he stopped checking every training and materia room on the grounds.

"Also, if he breaks down my door looking for you, I'm making you pay for that."

Cloud shook his head but didn't respond. He hadn't planned to skip the session, especially since he was already drowning in guilt after switching mako exam times and hurting Zack, but the closer the training session drew, the more detail he remembered about the hallucination. He'd broken Zack's wrist with the kind of casual cruelty he normally used on humanoid fiends. He'd kicked him into his own countertop and left a pool of red blood on it. The thought of lifting a buster sword at Zack again—even blunted in a controlled environment—made Cloud feel sick.

"Nothing," Reno said exasperatedly, throwing down the pieces of his PHS and cutting into Cloud's thoughts. "How the hell did he get into my computer then? I'm gonna have to take that apart too." Reno paused, as though sensing Cloud's incredulity. "Rude'll put it back together. I promised to help him get Dominic the Brawler."

"Who?"

"Dominic the Brawler. He's a hitman in the slums. Punches people's teeth out in one hit or something. I know a guy who knows a guy." Frankly, Reno thought Cloud had only been able to hurt the Lieutenant General because Zack hadn't wanted to hurt _him_. So he was only too happy to talk about something else.

"What did you promise Rude to get him to loop the cameras?"

Reno tossed his half-dissembled PHS to the side and really looked at Cloud. The blond looked like his usual determined self—except for his eyes, which were sunken slightly with guilt and self-loathing. "Tuesti. Rude had a feeling he was up to something."

"What is he up to, Reno?" Cloud managed to encompass _why did Cait Sith stay in the labs,_ _what is Reeve planning_ , and _how are you involved_ in that one question. Reno could tell Cloud was really looking for anything else to think about other than his beat-up friend.

"Rude was in charge of monitoring this flower girl in the slums, so he knows Reeve was visiting her. I told him Tuesti was just an environmentalist, but apparently eco-terrorism is a thing, so Rude wouldn't let it go until I admitted Tuesti was poking around the system. Pretty sure Rude will just keep monitoring but won't stop him for now."

The blond didn't comment, just waited.

"Anyway, I've been trying to see if Tuesti is… amenable, that's the right word right? He's not Shinra's biggest fan but he's an exec, and he might know something about your little she-beast."

Any word about Jenova was almost guaranteed to set Cloud off, and sure enough he was more than happy to focus on that.

"If he doesn't already know what experiments were done with Jenova he'll definitely be supportive after finding out," Cloud said, glancing back at the empty elevator on the monitor. Zack would be coming soon.

"Tell me again how you know him. And his cat-moogle-thing," Reno said.

"Cait Sith was part of my team. Originally it was Reeve spying on us, but he eventually turned on Shinra and fed us information. He ran the WRO after Shinra collapsed."

"What made him switch sides?"

Cloud just shrugged one-shoulder and Reno rolled his eyes.

"Motives Cloud, _motives_. Lazard's is to destabilize Shinra, but he was impatient according to Tuesti. Tuesti isn't though, and he's working slowly from the inside. He might not be _your_ Reeve, but that's pretty damn close."

"He might be able to help," Cloud admitted, "but he didn't switch sides until he'd seen for himself the things Shinra was up to through Cait Sith."

"Well it sounds like he made the switch now." Reno glanced back at his PHS half-heartedly. Two seconds later though Cloud was standing up and grabbing his stuff. "What?"

"Someone's on the stairs."

"You can't avoid him forever," Reno said, before making a comical face. He sounded like a girl at a slumber party.

Cloud was already out the door and in the elevator when a familiar First Class knocked on the door.

"He's not here," Reno drawled to Zack Fair, Lieutenant General of SOLDIER and Supreme Spiky-haired. (Reno had never told Cloud he secretly thought their hairstyles were creepily similar.)

Zack sighed and crossed his arms. One wrist splinted and wrapped in white. He had probably heard Cloud sprint for the elevator if Cloud had been able to hear him on the stairs. "I don't suppose you'd call me if he shows up again?"

"He won't," Reno said assuredly.

There was a pause as Zack seemed to think for a second before he decided on something. "Got any insight—"

"No."

"—other than Cloud's guilt complex. Right." Zack didn't push the issue. _Probably because he values loyalty or something_ , Reno thought scathingly while ignoring his own hypocrisy.

Zack glanced around the apartment and his eyes alighted on the PHS pieces. "For the record, Shinra builds both the computers and the software that runs them, so the hole is in the system itself. PHS's are a different department in Junon though, so that's why you can scramble them," he said casually.

Reno wanted to knock his head on the doorframe. But perhaps he could give Zack _something_ for the little piece of info he'd just received. "Cloud's got a protective streak wider than every mother chocobo on the damn planet." Reno tried to shut the door, but Zack used one hand to casually hold it open.

"And I guess revenge gets messy with a lot of collateral damage huh?" It was a leading statement, but Reno wasn't sure what Zack was getting at. How much did he know and how much did he guess? And considering Cloud's description of the destruction of Midgar, Nibelheim, and the trail of bodies left behind by a deranged Sephiroth, yeah, messy was an understatement. Reno's expression must have said as much because Zack let him close the door in his face.

* * *

The Ancient Forest south of Cosmo Canyon was almost choked with more greenery per square foot than Sephiroth could ever remember seeing. The jungles of Wutai had been teeming with color but this forest was darker, the ground covered in thick patches of moss and the trees hanging low with webs of branches and brambles.

Sephiroth had started his investigation of the three mysterious men in Cosmo Canyon and was on his way to the Golden Saucer when some gut-instinct noticed the tiny marker for the Ancient Forest on the map. It was an ideal place to hide—filled as it was with all the undergrowth and uncharted reaches—and the three silver-haired men hadn't been spotted recently.

Masamune made quick work of the beasts roaming the area as Sephiroth canvassed the edges of the forest. He just wanted to see if anything had been disturbed recently or if there were any signs of human passage. The three had not seemed to care much about secrecy, after all. If they'd come through here, there would be clues.

"Sephiroth."

The General paused, turning his blade sharply at a deep shadow beside one of the massive trunks. He recognized the face at once even as he knew it wasn't him. "You're not Genesis."

"How can you tell?" it asked with that same arrogant tone, flicking its graying hair out of its eyes as it stepped out. The forest was still shadowed, but the degradation of this clone was quite noticeable.

Sephiroth didn't answer.

It sighed, rolling it eyes in almost the same way Genesis did. Sephiroth resolutely ignored the tiny pang when he thought of his friend and what the degradation had done to him. Angeal was gone, and Genesis wasn't far behind.

"I need your help," it admitted.

" _Genesis_ needs my help."

" _Pride is lost / Wings stripped away, the end is nigh_ ," it quoted. "I wouldn't ask if I wasn't desperate."

" _My friend, do you fly away now?_ " Sephiroth quoted back. "Except you've already flown away. Genesis and desperate don't go together."

"Everyone reaches the point. Come back with me and you can save me—Genesis. You're the answer to this whole thing. You have what I want—as always," the clone ended bitterly.

"What is Genesis doing?" Sephiroth asked, ignoring the offer. Genesis had thoroughly proven that he would plow over anything and anyone to get his way, and he'd killed a lot of SOLDIERs to do it. He'd led Angeal into this madness and now might be trying to lead Sephiroth into something much more sinister. His friend was gone; he wasn't going to help what was left.

"It's in your cells, Sephiroth—the S-cells. They're the key." When Sephiroth remained silent the clone kept going. "There wasn't a shred left in Nibelheim. Your cells are it. You're the perfect specimen!" It started to laugh, the sound more than a little hysterical. "Somehow—I don't know how—Hojo got your formula right. With your cells I could be whole again, no longer a monster caught in transformation. _My friend your desire / is the bringer of life, the gift of the goddess_."

There were a lot of things Sephiroth could have answered to that, but the word 'Nibelheim' stuck out in all of the rambling. There hadn't been a shred of _what_ left in Nibelheim? Was this because of Cloud's actions there, and had the blond known this would be the result? Sephiroth pushed aside his confusion about Nibelheim for the moment to focus on the three silver-haired men, because the only person who was capable of making copies was Genesis. And if the copies were around here then they might be related.

"I'm not here to help you or fight you, clone. Not unless you've already got those S-cells you want."

"Got them? Do you think I'd be hunting you down in a forest if I had them?" It spat. Genesis had always had a short temper and degradation frayed those lines. The clone likely had no goal outside this one, and Sephiroth was being obstinate.

"The three silver-haired men in the Golden Saucer and Cosmo Canyon aren't connected to you, then?" Sephiroth asked to confirm, because it was frightening to think the three violent men who might be clones of Sephiroth on the loose. That would also mean Genesis and Hollander were not behind them—leaving just one other scientist as the culprit.

"There are three more vessels with S-cells?" the Genesis clone asked, one eyebrow going up and interest illuminating its features. Sephiroth couldn't be sure directing Genesis and his small army to the three was a good idea but it was too late now. "My offer still stands, though. I would rather not have some poor copy of you that'll degrade, Sephiroth. _Your_ cells are the answer."

"What were you looking for in Nibelheim?"

"Jenova," the Genesis copy said, a smirk on its face. "Your mother."

"She's dead."

"Hardly." It didn't seem put off by Sephiroth's frigid tone. Then again, Genesis never had. "Sloppy of Hojo to leave a steaming pile of rubble at the reactor, but he's only delaying. We'll get those cells and be cured and then you'll see. _When the war of the beasts brings the world's end / the goddess descends from the sky_."

"Three quotes in one conversation… you really must be desperate," Sephiroth remarked almost automatically because he could feel his pulse increasing. His mother, Jenova, was long dead. Genesis had to be mistaken, just like he was in thinking it was Hojo's handiwork that destroyed the Mansion and reactor… But the idea of Jenova in Nibelheim and Cloud destroying the two Shinra places located there… destroying all evidence of Sephiroth's mother and experimentation…

 _It always leads back to Cloud_ , Sephiroth couldn't help thinking, and for some reason, the familiar dilemma helped him to control his pulse and be calm.

"Pride is lost," the Genesis clone repeated, smirk getting wider on his face. "Your cells, Sephiroth?"

"Never, Genesis."

* * *

The back room of Aeris' church smelled strongly of mulch, fertilizer, the good earth, and a faint whiff of the flowers in the main hall. It was comforting, and Cloud hoped that would discourage some of his worst memories from appearing during the mako hallucinations.

"Two injections," Cloud said as Vincent flicked the end of one needle. Cloud looked away, determinedly staring at the bag of rich dirt beside him. His stomach felt like it wanted to rebel and he had to consciously relax his muscles.

There were possibly more secure places in the slums for getting clandestine mako injections, but Cloud didn't want to risk hurting anyone and the church was in a fairly empty area with a large room. Vincent had promised to remain out of sight and reach of Cloud while still making sure he did not leave the building. The ex-Turk had already confirmed there was no surveillance today, as well.

"Three in a week." It was a mild rebuke from Vincent. Cloud was risking a lot to do this. But seeing Zack healed today, how his squad members outstripped him in speed and strength, how quickly Cloud's endurance flagged, had simply pushed him further towards this moment. He couldn't afford the weakness. Not with so much riding on the line.

Vincent swabbed Cloud's left elbow and smoothly injected the mako serum. "Aeris is praying to the Planet," he said incongruously as he prepped the second syringe. Fire was licking up Cloud's arm alarmingly fast. The second syringe wasn't even close to full because this was the formula for Seconds, but when Cloud tried to protest the meager amount, Vincent just depressed it in response. "Mako glow in a Third class indicates high absorption rates."

Vincent didn't say that it meant a slightly less chance of suffering mako poisoning from the sudden influx of stronger mako, but it was his own attempt at comfort. Cloud had been unable to get his medical reports because the doctor had told him to ask his CO, and Harke would surely take that information straight to Zack.

His head was starting to spin as he thought of Zack, who had come by and watched Cloud's squad practice today. Cloud hadn't been able to avoid it because Harke had been warned he was skipping training and had sent two squad members at 0500 to fetch him.

Vincent stepped back and made sure to take Cloud's dagger, boots, materia, and any loose objects on him as he climbed the rafters. Cloud didn't notice him go; he was remembering Zack's face as he watched the training session, thinking that… thinking something.

* * *

The next time he remembered feeling even remotely like himself was Sunday morning.

He'd taken the two syringes of mako on Friday.

Vincent spent Friday night watching over a mumbling, incoherent Cloud, whose head did a strange and worrying ticking and twitching motion every few minutes. He made sure to check Cloud's pulse hourly, and despite Cloud's warnings the blond didn't react to any stimulus.

Much of Saturday morning was spent watching Cloud converse with ghosts, including at one point Vincent himself, regarding Jenova's second reunion. Several hours in, Cloud laid flat on the ground as he cried for someone's death—though Vincent couldn't tell who—and at one terrible point he began thrashing in the midst of a horrific nightmare, though his wrists and ankles remained firmly on the ground as though strapped to a table.

By Saturday night, Cloud was almost unconscious but finally showing the more normal, post-mako injection signs. He'd been unable to keep even water down, and had ended up lying naked in the dirt because he outright refused any clothing because his skin was so itchy. There had been one hour where Cloud had been utterly unresponsive, and Vincent had crouched over him and to check his heartbeat, breathing, and pupil dilation to be sure he hadn't succumbed to poisoning. Cloud had finally slipped into actual sleep around midnight and not until this moment had he so much as stirred.

"Zack?" Cloud said groggily, stirring under the blanket on the dirt. The fact that he was covered in dirt and surrounded by the smell of flowers was confusing, but not nearly as confusing as when Cloud pushed himself upright and nearly toppled right over.

"Cloud."

Vincent swam into sharp focus, standing on the edge of the flower patch. Cloud's memory was starting to come back. He was in Aeris' church, sunlight streaming in, and there was Vincent. It must have worked.

"How was… what happened?"

The next time he tried to move it was almost effortless to sit up and pull himself on to a bench. Unashamedly, he started to dress, feeling amazed at how light the normally heavy boots now felt. The immediate effects of a mako treatment tended to fade within ten hours, but it was lingering now. In fact, he felt like he was starving.

"You were semi-conscious through most of it and spoke mostly when you weren't."

Cloud tightened his belt and was glad not to feel the swooping sensation he had after every other hallucination with Zack and Sephiroth. No matter what he'd said or done, it wouldn't have surprised Vincent. Semi-conscious was worrying though.

"How long?"

"Twenty-four hours."

Cloud had to swallow a lump, and the short burst of happiness he'd felt when his strength hadn't faded now seemed hollow. All SOLDIERs were drilled before every mako exam that no reaction is a bad reaction—or rather, that if a SOLDIER isn't physically reacting or mentally reacting it's cause for worry. Cloud had been semi-conscious for a _day._ "It's Sunday, then."

Vincent nodded, his expression unreadable. "Your eyes are glowing. Your next exam results will be notable."

"I'll figure it out," Cloud answered the unspoken question. He didn't actually know how he would deal with the next mako exam or follow-up, but the pressure to live by Shinra rules had eroded significantly.

Jenova was out there, the remnants were out there, and staying off Shinra's radar was impossible with Zack and Sephiroth on him already. He'd made his choices and now nothing was going to get in his way.


	37. Out Hunting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cloud leaves Midgar and Zack is on the hunt for him--but what does he find?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter has not been betaed, nor did I get as far as I liked, but it's been so long since I've updated that I really felt like I should give you amazing people something. (Thank you to EVERYONE who reviewed and bugged me here and on Tumblr, you are all fantastic.) Happy New Year everyone, and maybe this will be the year I write so much GD that I actually finish it!

Following the successful injections with Vincent, the increased distance from Zack, and the continued lack of Sephiroth around Shinra HQ, things had been looking up for Cloud. So when the other shoe dropped, Cloud had been expecting a summons to the General's office, a confrontation with Zack, or an order to see Hojo about his heightened mako levels—but not this.

In his hands he had a weathered, slightly yellow letter that was covered in stamps and smudged ink from its long journey. He didn't know how long it must have sat in the Nibelheim post office through the snowstorms or been waiting to be sorted in Shinra HQ before it reached him. Too long as it turned out.

_Cloud Strife_  
SOLIDER Cadet Program  
Shinra Headquarters  
Migar

The address was full of misspellings, as though Mayor Lockhart could not have cared less that the letter would only find its way to Cloud after being manually sorted by Shinra's postal staff, been stamped as "wrong address" twice, and the corner ripped off in transit before finally making it's pathetic way into his mailbox, which Cloud checked once a week if that.

So the letter was three months too late.

_Cloud Strife,_

_We regret to inform you that your mother, Elanor Strife, was found dead this last November 3_ _rd_ _. Please come and claim any possessions and deeds within the month. She will be buried in the local cemetery as per her request._

_Condolences,_

_Mayor Brian Lockhart_

By noon that day Cloud left Midgar with a small sack of his possessions, an illicitly taken buster sword, and five materia. He left nothing but a Leave of Absence form with the box "bereavement leave" checked in Captain Harke's mailbox, and a curt PHS message to Vincent.

* * *

"I'm sorry to ask this, Zack. Youta said he confirmed with Strife at breakfast he'd be there, but he didn't show."

Zack rubbed one eye as he leaned back in his office chair with the PHS to his ear. "It's okay Harke, I'll find him. I appreciate you bringing this to me and not the Shinra Military Police." It wasn't that Sephiroth couldn't squash an investigation, but that was the sort of favoritism that went beyond friendship and into questionable territory.

"Strife's a good guy," Harke said gruffly on the phone. "And it's not like he's slacking off to gamble and drink. Just doesn't do teamwork."

"Yeah, I know," Zack groused as he ended the call. Cloud was missing _again_. Zack had understood why Cloud had skipped their one-on-one session last week; he even forgave him for disappearing all weekend to nurse his self-loathing—not that he liked it. But it was getting ridiculous and now dangerously close to court-martial territory. Zack would not see his friend go down that way, so he was going to drag Cloud's unwilling ass the same way he'd nearly bullied Sephiroth into friendship.

Zack checked all Cloud's usual haunts, including the pool locker room after a Second tipped him off that Cloud had been lurking there before. No blond turned up, though the weapon's lock-up was missing a buster sword, so Cloud was training somewhere as usual.

"Department of Administrative Research, please wait while we triangulate your position and move the snipers."

Zack couldn't quite stop himself from cracking a smile at Reno's greeting. He didn't much like the Turks, but he could appreciate why Cloud liked this one. "Reno, it's Zack."

"If Cloud's not where he's supposed to be then I don't know anything about it," the redhead said immediately.

"You don't, do you?" Zack asked skeptically.

Reno groaned under his breath and added what was likely a curse to Cloud's name.

"We're both friends of his, Reno," Zack tried, hoping there was something more than sarcasm and ambition in the redhead's heart, "and I'm worried about him. He's gonna get court-martialed if he skips out on more practices and doesn't sign out weapons. You know he's up to something."

"Leave off him and he'll be fine," Reno answered bluntly. So much for soft appeals.

"And if that something gets him killed?"

"Cloud's tougher than that. Beat you up didn't he?" Somehow the jab didn't sound as strong as it could have. Reno might stick by a strong fighter like Cloud for selfish reasons, but as Sephiroth had proven, Cloud had a way of wiggling into the cracks of the heart.

"I've got a feeling Cloud's getting in over his head. Or rather, I'm not sure his mind can take it." Zack felt a little guilty voicing it, but it was obvious Cloud's head was a jumble of terrible memories.

Reno definitely hesitated for a breath. "Look, I don't know where he is. Cloud's not 'all there' all the time but there's a lot of shit you don't know about him so—"

"If there's something you know that I can do to help him, Reno—"

"It's pretty damn clear to him you'd make it worse," Reno snapped, cutting Zack off.

" 'To him' but not to you?" Reno cursed again and hung up before he had to respond. Unfortunately, while Reno obviously knew more than he was saying, Zack was also sure he didn't know where Cloud was. The blond never put all his chocobo hatchlings in one basket.

There hours later, Zack was staring at a hastily signed piece of paper and seriously questioning whether Cloud even cared about SOLDIER anymore. It had been his dream, Zack knew, but this paper and his behavior recently were telling a different story.

"It's marked today," he noted, thumb brushing the date at the top of the Leave of Absence form. _Bereavement leave_ … Cloud only had one family member left that he knew of. Which meant he was going to only one place.

…The same place, of course, that he'd destroyed two buildings and quite possibly suffered immense abuse at as a child.

"Technically he needs approval before going, but he must have left in a hurry. Or…"

"That'll be all, Captain Harke," Zack said shortly, reverting to official names to forestall any questions. "I trust that Cloud was honest on this, even if he skipped authorization. He doesn't do teamwork _or_ red tape well." That cracked a small smile on Harke's face, but the man still looked worried as he saluted and walked out.

Zack rather wanted to bang his head on the table, but instead he took out his PHS and speed-dialed the one person who was both in the area and the last thing Cloud would want to see.

"Sephiroth, Cloud's left."

"Left to where?" The General asked sharply, voice crackling a bit over the line. It sounded like he was in a truck.

"Nibelheim it looks like. He took bereavement leave and his mother's the only family he has. Had."

"Then it's unfortunate I'm on an airship halfway to Midgar." The engine sound was fading as Sephiroth walked on the deck.

"If I catch a transport now—"

"We have something to discuss when I return. Without an airship it will take Cloud at least a week to reach the mountains."

Zack ran a hand through his hair and had to consciously remind himself that just because Sephiroth _sounded_ calm and controlled didn't mean he was. "And if he doesn't return?"

"His PHS has a tracking device in it."

"He's gonna expect that," Zack warned.

"He will not expect the one I embedded in the hilt of the training buster sword," Sephiroth replied almost smugly.

Zack could feel his shoulders slump a bit and knew he shouldn't really be so relieved that they had two tracking devices on his friend. "Well, bereavement leave means four days off not including travel, so if he's not coming back this way in two weeks time I'm gonna drag him back."

"I will drive the car," Sephiroth promised.

* * *

Cloud caught the 0930 transport bus from Midgar to the port, arriving a little after lunchtime. He bought a sandwich with a few gil and immediately secured a seat on the next cross-channel ship bound for the Western Continent. It would be an hour's wait before he could board though, so after stowing his things in one of the lockers Cloud wandered off the docks and into the first weapons shop he saw.

He needed to buy a whetstone because the buster sword he currently had was blunted for training. There wasn't a locker big enough for the sword, so he'd drawn more than a few stares cutting a swath through the docks. His eyes' faint mako-glow warded off questions just as they had in the other timeline.

"A buster sword!" the proprietor of the local weapons shop cried excitedly when Cloud walked in. "Don't see many of those around."

"…"

"You must be a SOLDIER," he amended more politely, though the burly man continued to eye the sword on Cloud's back with fascination. "Be needing a new hilt wrap? I've got six different colors, including ones to match your rank Mr.…?"

Cloud ignored the man's questions as he examined the glass case on one wall that had various sized whetstones, oils, and cloths. The owner didn't give up though, pulling something out from behind the counter that rattled as he set it down. "If you're a man who appreciates swords then you might like to see these beauties I bought at auction recently…"

"The second one," Cloud interrupted flatly, pointing to one stone. The man abandoned whatever he was trying to sell to Cloud to pull the whetstone case out. As it was hurriedly wrapped, Cloud's gaze drifted across the usual tableau of broadswords, daggers, and firearms. On the table the sword the proprietor had been trying to sell to Cloud glimmered just a bit in the afternoon sun slanting through the window, illuminating saw-like teeth for an edge.

In two strides Cloud was standing over twin blades unique in shape not just for their size—too large for broadswords but nowhere near the size of a buster sword—and their serrated edges. Cloud recognized the longsword-style grip, the shape of the teeth, and the fine silver color. These were the twin back blades of his fusion sword.

He was staring at them so hard he almost palmed his small dirk when the proprietor slid the box with the whetstone across the counter to him.

"Like them, do you?"

"Where did you get them?" Cloud asked. He didn't mean to sound demanding but he did anyway.

"Auction," the man replied a bit startled. "Some old man died and these were in the basement. Not sure what they're made of yet but sharp as anything I've worked." He was starting to wilt under Cloud's stare, and his words tapered into silence.

The blond didn't ask permission when he hefted one of the blades up. The grip was long enough for two hands, but Cloud was pleased to see that he only needed one for these smaller blades as he had before. It made a unique whistling sound in the air as he swung it, the heft and weight the same as he remembered, and Cloud felt a brief shot of exhilaration. If there were these two pieces here, then he could find the other parts of the fusion blade. It would take a lot of retooling and work to make them fit together as one, and without the main blade First Tsurugi it wouldn't be possible, but…

"How much?"

The proprietor perked up at the thought of a sale. "The material is quite amazing, sir, and hasn't needed any maintenance since I got it, not to mention the finery of the work themselves, so the price is on the higher end, per say…"

"Name it."

"50,000 gil. Each."

Exorbitant didn't quite do it justice. The most expensive blades Cloud had ever bought were around 20,000 gil. 100,000 gil, even for two fine swords, was a hefty price. Cloud didn't have that kind of money and stealing wasn't in his nature. But these two blades… the fusion sword was much more adept for fighting, and he'd grown to rely on having a handy blade no matter the circumstances.

"A trade. This buster sword for those two."

"What?" the man guffawed. "Busters swords aren't common, but they're not worth _that_ much."

"This one is," Cloud nodded to the one strapped over his shoulder. He didn't bother to make up a history for it. Everyone knew of Angeal and Zack and their infamous blades. If Reno had taught Cloud anything, it was that letting people draw their own conclusions was best.

"Blunt if you need a whetstone, eh? I'll halve my price and take the sword too and call it a deal."

"Blunt because it's been abandoned for a year."

The man started to look a bit nervous as the meaning of that sunk in. "I don't want the Lieutenant General of SOLDIER coming down on me for his master's blade," he said with less confidence, eyeing the blade over Cloud's shoulder.

Cloud's gaze slid down to the twin blades again, and he knew what Reno would have recommended doing right now. The owner was portly and not enhanced; threatening him and taking the swords would be the easy way out, especially with Cloud's boat leaving so soon.

"Mastered Earth materia." Cloud pulled the glowing ball out of his pocket and put it on the counter; he wasn't a thug threatening a man trying to make a living. Mastered materia were worth a lot and the blond was reluctant to part with any of them, but of all the materia he had, Quake was the most dangerous to use, especially in mountainous regions like Nibelheim. He could give it up if it meant having part of his fusion sword back.

The greasy man still looked skeptical, but greed was winning out. A named blade—so he thought—and a Mastered materia were well worth two mysterious swords that would be difficult to sell for all their novelty. Not many people in the world could dual-wield two full-sized serrated blades and collectors were rare.

"Deal."

Cloud unstrapped the training buster sword and laid it on another cloth on a different countertop before picking up the familiar twin blades. Just as before, their grips seemed to mold perfectly to the shape of his hand. He didn't have a proper harness for them, but once the proprietor had confirmed the Earth materia was genuine he quickly cobbled together a leather vest with straps for them both.

He gingerly touched the swathed handle of the buster sword as Cloud saw himself out, and was not surprised he didn't feel guilty about swindling the man. These swords… the fusion sword had been his, and neither the materia nor the training blade were as valued.

* * *

"Well? The preliminary report stated mission failure but there's something else?" Zack asked, lounging back in his usual chair in Sephiroth's office pretending he hadn't jogged all the way here from the training hall in anticipation when he'd heard the General's airship arrive.

Sephiroth had been waiting for him, still wearing the leather outfit he wore in the field and a duffle bag tucked in the corner of the office. He looked impeccable, but there was tightness around his glowing eyes that showed he was unsettled. "I met with one of Genesis' clones."

Zack perked up. "And?"

"It didn't know anything about the three silver-haired men, but had quite a bit to say about Nibelheim." Sephiroth had opened a map before Zack arrived, and he turned to stare at the detailing of the Western continent. Nibelheim was a tiny dot on the map amidst the Nibel Mountains.

"What? Nibelheim? Since when did that town get so famous?"

"Since Hojo used it for experimentation. That's been confirmed from the evidence of the destruction wrought by Cloud and what I found in Hojo's files. The clone said—" and there was the barest hesitation—"that my mother had been there."

Zack stopped lounging and sat up. "Your mother? Je…?"

"Jenova."

"Jenova." Zack rolled the name for a moment in his mouth. Sephiroth had only mentioned her once before to him, and that was about all her knew of his mother. "Isn't she… dead?"

"I was under that impression," Sephiroth said a bit stiffly, and one of his fists clenched for just a moment. "I was also under the erroneous impression that Professor Hojo was my father."

"Wait, what!" Zack yelped, staring at Sephiroth incredulously. "You thought Hojo was your father?"

"As he stated it, he was the primary caregiver in my infancy, and thus accepted the role of father even when biologically he was not. He never told me." There was a burning anger deep in Sephiroth's eyes that might have made another man cringe back. Zack had seen this look only a handful of times before.

"And you believed that?" Zack said indignantly. Sephiroth's eyes flicked away for a second. "You have less in common with that man than you do with a Dual Horn," the First insisted. He reached out slowly and grabbed Sephiroth's forearm. "Pretty sure that monster—and I don't mean the Dual Horn—couldn't get laid if he tried. With your looks your parents were probably doing just fine." Zack shared his usual smile with Sephiroth, still tinged a bit with forced cheer. Sephiroth's own lips twitched for just a moment.

"I learned this after looking for any files about Cloud in Nibelheim. My father's DNA was on record. Any files concerning my mother are under the tightest security." A small wrinkle appeared for a second on Sephiroth's brow. "I do not know why Jenova is so heavily guarded."

"Genesis has to be wrong," Zack said, hand still on Sephiroth's forearm. Something about this talk was making him nervous. Sephiroth had a tendency to obsess when he didn't have an answer, and Hojo's secrets were a dangerous line to cross, even for the General. "Cloud wouldn't kill an innocent. He said himself he destroyed the Mansion and Reactor. Do you really think he wouldn't have saved her if she was there?"

"Inside the reactor…" Sephiroth could picture those tubes from the pictures, shattered on the ground and spilling the mangled limbs of former humans. If his mother had been like that…

"Cloud would save anything he found there. I know he would," Zack said firmly, gripping Sephiroth's arm hard enough to make the man look him in the eye. "I talked to Reno when I couldn't find Cloud after his episode—when he broke my wrist. He said himself Cloud's incredibly protective. He's trying to protect _us_ —not just from his revenge that will likely take him straight to Hojo, but also from pain in general."

"Like finding my mother mutilated and experimented on." Sephiroth said it so flatly it hurt Zack to hear it. Dealing with emotions was never Sephiroth's strong point, and the man had always chafed at the idea of being guarded.

"He wouldn't tell you. Hell, _I_ wouldn't tell you."

"Cloud may inadvertently have destroyed the S-cells then," Sephiroth said, mind jumping between the clones' words, Zack's theory, and what he knew himself. His mother occupied little thought for Sephiroth, and emotionally he'd always been distant from the woman who had seemingly abandoned him to a scientist as a child. Whether she did it willingly or not mattered little in the scheme of things. If she had been alive in some fashion in Nibelheim it disturbed Sephiroth, but if Cloud had truly destroyed everything, then practically demanded he move beyond it.

"What are you thinking?" Zack said somewhat warily. He finally removed his hand from Sephiroth's arm. Sephiroth didn't rise to be the General just because he was the strongest SOLDIER and made the President cower—he had a good eye for patterns too that made him excellent at strategy.

"Genesis is looking for S-cells to cure himself, and Hollander must have known the original experiments had been done in Nibelheim. Cloud's revenge—as far as we know—has no connection at all to Hollander's experiments. He admitted himself the leveling of the Mansion and reactor were personally motivated, likely to eliminate evidence of himself."

"Thus inadvertently destroying the S-cells there," Zack repeated. "Do you think he freed the three silver-haired men? If he thought them innocent…" The horror of the thought seemed to catch up to Zack just then.

"It has crossed my mind," Sephiroth admitted. "The Genesis clone had no knowledge of the three either, but it's likely Genesis is hunting them down too by now. They may have S-cells also."

Zack looked slightly sick at the implication of their relationship to Sephiroth, but the General had used the time in the airship to compartmentalize his own feelings regarding the three violent men. His mind was turning back to Hojo, who was the only one who knew how all these threads connected. Why had he created clones of Sephiroth? In case he failed? Why did he keep his mother in Nibelheim, if Genesis was right? Where did Cloud fall into this scheme of things?

"Hojo still holds the most cards," Sephiroth said finally. Too many gaps meant too many assumptions.

"And Cloud." Sephiroth glanced over at Zack, who was staring at the dot of Nibelheim on the map as he spoke. "Hojo doesn't explain Cloud's ability. He knew what he was doing with the buster sword—knew better than I can explain. I never taught him those advanced techniques, and there's no way, _no way_ , he got that good by watching me."

"And you do not believe Angeal was involved?"

"No. Well, I want to. Cloud was sincere when he said no though; I know he was. But that means there's someone else out there. Maybe it was a clone of Angeal?" Zack had one hand in his hair and he looked pained. After Angeal's death, degradation was a quick process for a clone, and surely Cloud would have realized at some point the clone wasn't telling the truth about its origin. Assuming it even had that much autonomy.

"All right, enough of this," Zack declared, standing up. "We're going in circles like usual. I'm going to load up the tracker and see where Cloud is. You need to work off this energy. Jax and two squads under him are shipping out tomorrow—see if you can still whip them even with all this on your mind." Zack waved a hand at the map and the stack of files on one shelf that were solely dedicated to Cloud. Then he turned and exited the office for his own.

Sephiroth felt unwieldy as soon as Zack left. He liked to fix his mind on one objective and focus on it, but the net kept getting wider and wider. Not only was there Cloud's murky past mixing into the secrets of Hojo, but now Sephiroth's own mother, potential copies, genetic history, and old friends were added in. The answers were mutually inclusive, but how?

He didn't get much sleep that night, but he did beat Jax's two squads and three other Firsts at the same time in a bid to work off his frustration and uncharacteristic indecisiveness.

* * *

"For troublemakers you're not easy to find," the scientist said, looking at the three silver-haired figures with carefully hidden interest. Each of them had characteristics of the famous General, but none were quite like him either. That was a component of cloning Hollander had never seen before.

"We were told you're looking for Mother too," said the youngest with barely restrained disgust. He eyed Dr. Hollander with contempt, lingering on the worn word 'Banora' written on his t-shirt. His eyes flicked up to the First in red watching them, challenging.

Genesis remained in the shadows though. He had wanted to strike the three down at once and test their cells after they were dead, but they'd proven an effective trio against the myriad of copies Hollander had insisted guard their temporary base. Genesis might be Hollander's greatest success, but neither of them wanted to take an unnecessary risk. Bad enough they'd accidentally lured three rampaging beasts into their den—SOLDIERs would be coming soon to investigate the commotion if they were still monitoring the area.

"Jenova is Mother to the whole world, and we want to share in her bounty too," Hollander declared.

The youngest laughed in a high-pitched, manic way that was made all the more frightening by the lack of reaction from his brothers. Genesis stepped out from the shadows finally, looking down on them from the railing above. "What will you do when you have her?"

"Reunite with her and fulfill her wishes!" cried the youngest, and a kind of feverish devotion filled the three men. The crackling electricity on the burliest man's arm spat and jumped as he flexed. Hollander took two involuntary steps back. It had been his idea to try and coerce the three clones, but they were more volatile than he expected.

"And if I asked for Mother's blessing?" Genesis asked, descending in a careful glide to the lower floor. He flicked his hair out of his eyes in a practiced gesture.

"Beg and she'll consider it," sneered the middle one, who was irritatingly smug. The small feathers close to Genesis' back bunched up at the affront. Hollander sensed their window was closing on this.

"Shinra has your Mother-" he started, but a blur grabbed him up into a bruising grip before he could finish.

"Where is she!" the burliest demanded, holding Hollander a foot from the floor. The long-haired one stood right beside him, a look of deepest loathing on his face.

"Mideel!" the scientist yelped, feeling the lower part of his arms start to go numb as the blood was cut off from the grip on his biceps. He grabbed at the long-haired clone to steady himself. "There's a SOLDIER outpost there and an old lab in Banora! That's where she is!" Hollander stumbled as he was abruptly let go. By the time his arms started to prickle with feeling again, the three silver-haired clones were gone.

"Follow them," he gasped to Genesis. "They can sense Jenova."

"What _are_ they?" Genesis demanded, turning that angry glare on Hollander. Ever since Angeal's death the two had been barely united in their cause, and Hollander could see Genesis' patience with him fraying even more at the inclusion of these three.

"Copies of another kind. Aspects more like. It means the General has weaknesses and we've got a hound for Jenova. You want those cells? The source is the best."

"You let them go without taking any cells at all," Genesis snapped at him.

"Blood would have been better, but a hair will tell us if they have any at all." Hollander proudly held up the short silver hairs he's pulled when the burly one picked him up.

* * *

"I'm taking Friday off," Zack announced the moment the penthouse elevator doors opened. Sephiroth had just stepped out of the kitchen with a cup of tea. "Cloud's GPS signal hasn't moved in two days. I'm going to retrace his steps."

Sephiroth looked out the window, staring out at the distant ocean. "I cannot go with you. I have an appointment with Hojo and both of us should not be gone at once lest we create suspicion."

Sephiroth certainly sounded like he wanted to go, and Zack felt more determined than ever to find Cloud.

"I won't leave the continent. Can't really, not with Heidegger wanting three Firsts for that inspection in Midgar. But I'll find out what happened with the GPS signal. Maybe he's just sitting on a dock fishing."

"I do not think Cloud's leisure time consists of sitting quietly and thinking," Sephiroth said, but he turned away from the window and looked pointedly at Zack's booted feet on his white carpet.

"Alright, I'm going. I'll check in every few hours, and let me know if the signal moves."

"He is not a baby chocobo fallen out of the nest," the General admonished, smirking outright as Zack walked back to the elevator.

"Says the man who planted two GPS devices on him!" Zack called back as the elevator doors shut.

It was still early when he reached the SOLDIER garage and signed out his motorcycle. The last few days had seen Zack habitually checking the tracker's signal on his PHS to the point that the other Firsts were joking about his new beau. One tracker hadn't moved since the outskirts of Midgar, which Zack was sure was the PHS one, but the other had stopped dead in the Midgar port and hadn't moved since. Had Cloud been forced to leave his weapon behind at the dock and go without it? Or a better question: _could_ anyone force Cloud to leave his sword behind? Zack was sure it would only happen when someone pried it out of Cloud's dead hands.

The thought left an unpleasant feeling in Zack's stomach as he raced out of the garage, haphazardly putting on his helmet as he skidded around a turn, and zoomed out of Midgar.

Twenty minutes out he was almost on top of the first tracker signal. Midgar still loomed behind him, and after ten minutes of searching Zack's sharp eyesight spotted a dusty little chip on the side of the road. Tossed out of the back of a transport, no doubt.

It was a two-hour ride to the port at high speed. It was an industrial center, full of packing and shipping companies, box and crate making factories, and row after row of tankers and cargo-laden ships. The sea breeze was hard to pick up when it was mixed so thoroughly with the fumes of oil and coal burned to keep the behemoth ships moving. Zack wrinkled his nose as he drove up into the small commercial area where passenger ships took off.

Crowds melted around him as he approached the ticket booth for the passenger lines. When he leaned down to talk to the cashier the man's face went chalky white. "I'm looking to speak with the manager and maybe your head of security," Zack said politely, flashing his Shinra ID.

The manager of the business appeared a minute later from a side door to greet him, face almost as sallow in color as the frightened cashier. His spiky black hair, glowing eyes, and giant sword said it all. Yeah, they knew who he was.

"General Lieutenant, sir!" he said as he approached, subtly wringing his hands behind his back. "This is unexpected. Please let me assist you in any way I can." He led Zack into the back, leaving behind the whispering crowd. Normally Zack would never do an investigation this way—in fact, he'd never investigated much in person because of his fame from the war—but it got results fast.

"I'm looking for this SOLDIER," he said, holding up a datapad with Cloud's Third Class photo on it. "He was here on Monday and likely bought a ticket for the Western Continent. Think you can find him on a security tape?"

"Yes, sir!" the manager jumped, quickly walking Zack to a security booth. While the manager rustled up a receipt, Zack skimmed the Monday morning tapes looking for that quintessential blond hair.

It took almost fifteen minutes of skimming to finally find a shot taken at 12:23 of Cloud standing in line to buy a ticket. Everyone was standing three steps away from him, and his eyes were strangely bright compared to everyone else's when he casually glanced up at the camera.

The security tapes didn't have any audio, but Cloud was there only briefly. Within five minutes he had bought his ticket, the training buster sword strapped to his back, and left. So he still had the sword when he arrived here, confirming that much. The hilt didn't look tampered with, and taking out the GPS system would have required some tools, according to Sephiroth.

"Here's the receipt, sir," the manager said as soon as Zack stepped out of the security booth. "One-way ticket to Costa del Sol, departure time 1:30pm."

Zack took the copy, thanked the manager, and left the ticket office. If Cloud had walked away with an hour free before departure that was the best window for getting rid of the tracker. But without tools he wouldn't be able to get the grip off without ruining the sword.

So Zack walked away from the docks and into town, full of tourists from Midgar and port-savvy sailors looking for sundries before finding a drink in one of the seedier pubs down the way. If there was one place Cloud was sure to go to, it was a weapon's store.

"Welcome to Mick's—" The man didn't even finish the greeting before he was choking on air and turning white at an alarming speed. Zack in full uniform plus a buster sword usually got a variety of reactions, but utter fear wasn't a normal one.

"He- he said you wouldn't come!"

Zack stopped dead in the doorway. "He? _He_ wouldn't happen to be a blond SOLDIER, would he?"

"Uh, y-yes sir. Blond hair sticking up everywhere, blue glowing eyes." The owner was sweating badly as he eyed the handle of Galatine over Zack's shoulder.

"What did he do here?" Zack asked. Was this how the Turks felt interrogating someone? Or how the Wutain people responded to Sephiroth during the war? Zack wondered. He didn't like the terror he was inspiring in this average civilian.

"T-Traded me. I had two nice matching blades, high quality. Traded a Mastered Earth materia and a-a buster sword."

"A buster sword?" Zack said a lot more calmly than he felt. Cloud _traded_ a buster sword for twin blades? Twin blades that as far as Zack knew Cloud had no training in how to wield? That sounded incredibly out-of-character for the man who'd been using Galatine with such skill last week.

The proprietor hurriedly disappeared into the back room and brought out the training buster sword on a rack with wheels. It had clearly been sharpened and shined, and there was an unfinished plaque on one side that said "Previously owned by First Class SO".

Zack stared at it in growing alarm. This wasn't like the Cloud he knew at all. Not only had Cloud traded a weapon he considered somewhat sacred but that plaque meant he'd probably fudged the origin too if not outright lied. _And_ thrown in a mastered materia all for two blades?

"Tell me about the swords you traded him," Zack ordered, unconsciously channeling Sephiroth. The man in front of him hunched over like he could hide somehow.

"I- I got them at an auction. Two serrated blades, two-handed grips but obviously meant to be used together even if they're too heavy for all but SOLDIERs. Finest silver polish I've ever seen, not scratched or dulled at all even though they'd been in that basement for Planet knows how long!" He was speaking quickly, spittle flying from his mouth. "I don't know what they were made of or where the old man got them. Bought them for half their worth, I swear that's the truth."

Twin blades. Serrated. Cloud was through-and-through a buster sword user. Zack was having trouble imagining this.

"Did he say where he was going? Anything about the blades?"

"N-no, nothing. Just asked where I got them and then demanded a trade." The man wiped his brow with a handkerchief and his gaze skittered to the training blade he'd buffed so nicely.

"Got security tapes?"

Ten minutes later Zack was calling Sephiroth from the docks, staring out west to the other continent like he'd be able to spot Cloud out there. By now Cloud was well on his way to Nibelheim—if that was even where he was going—and they had no trackers on him. The urge to get on a ship was strong enough that Zack turned around to give the sea his back when Sephiroth answered.

"General speaking."

"Seph, he sold the buster sword. Or traded it rather."

"Pardon?" There was a quiet disbelief in Sephiroth's voice that reinforced Zack's own.

"Traded it for twin serrated blades. Smaller than buster swords. I've never even done dual-wielding with him before." The small detail of the swords was almost easier to fixate on than the bigger picture of what Cloud was up to. Zack ground the heel of his hand into his temple to stop a headache from starting. He hated feeling helpless for his friends and he'd strived all his life to better himself for them. But Cloud… Cloud made that exceptionally difficult.

"I need to go after him, Seph. He's getting deeper into this hole," Zack said. He swung back to look at the ocean and felt uncharacteristically like cutting something into a hundred pieces and then doing it fifty more times. That was more of a Sephiroth-like behavior.

"Your orders are to return to Midgar." Sephiroth wasn't playing around if he was making actually orders, so Zack reluctantly turned and headed back to his bike, knowing he was going to gun it all the way back just to outrun this feeling of helplessness.

* * *

Two days later Zack was feeling less charitable than ever. His bad mood was compounded by Sephiroth's, who was still exasperated by all the loose ends and now one of the few men who outranked him: Heidegger. Sephiroth could intimidate the Head of Public Safety, but only to a point. And when Heidegger wanted three Firsts, Sephiroth could wiggle out, but the next there highest ranked SOLDIERs couldn't. So Zack had been forced to stand as security—him, a _First_ —while Heidegger belittled and guffawed his way through inspections for two days.

It left Zack with a lot of time to speculate where Cloud was, what havoc the three clones must be wreaking somewhere, what Genesis was planning, and how long it was going to take before Sephiroth cracked.

On Friday he felt his nerves getting particularly stretched as Heidegger ate a sumptuous meal of veal and roasted potatoes with pineapple—imported from Mideel—while overlooking the slums. The three on security had to simply stand there and watch as the cow of a man chewed and spit all over his food.

"I'm takin' lunch," Zack nearly growled to the other two Firsts, because he could only keep up appearances of good cheer for so long. At least they were in Sector 6, and it was a short hop over to see Aeris in her church. If there were anyone who could put the bounce back in Zack's step it would be her.

"Aeris?" he called as he opened the heavy doors to the church. The scent of flowers came through clearly even from the doorway. "You here?"

There was movement in the rafters, just the slightest whisper of cloth and the barest squeak of a step on wood. Without enhancements Zack wouldn't have heard it at all.

"You in the back?" he asked, though he already knew Aeris wasn't here. Someone was above him though, and as he walked down the aisle no one called down to him. Not a Turk then.

Zack faked nonchalance and strode over to the back room, which wasn't visible from the rafters in the main hall. He made sure to kick a couple boxes around to make it sound like he was rummaging, and then as quietly as possible climbed up until he could access the rafters too.

The moment he crossed the rafters from the back room to the chapel he had a triple-barreled gun at his cheek.

"Who are you?" Zack demanded despite his disadvantage. Sometimes it was best to ignore the gun to the head—particularly because the very act unnerved people. "Aeris is my friend."

"I mean her no harm." The man in red had a dark, flat voice with a rough edge like a smoker's. His face was still in shadow so Zack couldn't see anything but the black-gloved hand holding the gun and the tattered end of a red cape.

"But you're still here. And that's a custom gun. Turk?" The gun didn't move. Zack played it dumb. "I'm just here to make sure Aeris's okay. Where's your suit?"

The gun was lowered, but whoever it was persisted in standing in the single darkest corner of the church. As Zack turned he could make out the thick black hair and the sharp cheekbones of his face, culminating in startling, hard red eyes.

Zack had met a lot of dangerous people in his life, but this was not a face he recognized.

"Who are you?" he said, taking a step forward.

"Don't," the man said, but Zack had already taken one more, and their combined weight on the rafter was a little too much. The wood had been creaking ominously, but now it splintered, and with a deafening crack broke beneath them. Zack fell as the beam gave out and he dropped two stories before tucking forward and rolling as he hit the ground, coming up unharmed.

He didn't expect the same of the red-caped man, but the man landed lightly given the drop. He was crouched on both feet, one gold hand on the ground next to the gloved one. It was a lethal looking claw, matching the sharp boots and the gold trim on the gun.

"You're enhanced," Zack said, falling into a ready stance. He had his sword but drawing it would be even more threatening.

That red gaze locked on him, assessing from behind the cover of his cape, which was pulled to cover the lower half of his face. The man couldn't be much older than Sephiroth and yet he radiated experience and warning. This wasn't the sort of person Aeris consorted with—he screamed assassin.

"Who are you?" Zack demanded.

No response. Zack, who had been riding the edge of his patience for the last week, found himself getting angry. He wasn't leaving until he knew who this guy was. He'd had enough with not knowing anything.

The fight was brutally short. The red-caped man was faster than Zack expected and a lot wilier, but Zack had overconfidence drilled out of him, so he compensated quickly, pushing his body to move as fast as it could. He slammed two fists in quick succession to the man's torso, just missing grabbing the cloth as his wrists were crushed under a powerful downward blow. They dodged and wove around one another before Zack managed to get his knee up and into the man's thigh, just barely missing the headlock and taking two hard punches. He was lucky to evade the neck strike that would have knocked him out, and in a reflexive move too fast for anyone not a First, Zack grabbed the man by the hand and whipped it back hard enough to dislocate the wrist.

Except it didn't because that metal hand couldn't be dislocated. Still, it was leverage enough for what Zack wanted—

"Got it!" Zack snarled, holding a scrap of cape and more importantly, the guy's PHS, as he kicked out and skidded them both out of range. It was an old Shinra issue PHS, kind of clunky but therefore also easy to hack. Zack waited for a resumption of the fight, but the red-caped man only watched him warily. Keeping one eye on the clearly dangerous man, Zack deftly opened the PHS and clicked on call history. Everything had been erased, as had any messages, but the contacts list had exactly one name he cared about.

"You know Cloud!" Zack said incredulously. Cloud. Seriously. He'd have to double check if that were Cloud's number, but it wasn't like there were a lot of people wandering around with that name. _Of course_ it led back to him. _Of course_.

"…"

"He's one of your three contacts. How do you know him?" Zack demanded.

"…"

The man in red made no move for his gun and no indication he was going to explain.

"Cloud is my friend," Zack said, trying for an appeal like he had with Reno. "I want to help him."

"…I know."

"Then help me help him."

"It's Cloud's decision."

"Cloud's not here anymore."

"…"

Zack memorized the number on the phone and tossed it back at the red-caped man. "Tell me how you know Cloud."

The man turned around and started to walk away. Zack sprinted to get in front of him, but just before he could pass him, the man jumped up—and not just over Zack's head, but high enough to reach the rafters in one go.

"Where did you get your enhancements?!" Zack yelled up at him, but not even he could make a standing jump like that.

"Shinra has made a lot of mistakes," the man said calmly from above, staring down at Zack in a weirdly familiar empty look. It reminded him of the expression Sephiroth used to wear before Zack's friendliness wore him down. "Cloud is correcting them."

"Then let me help," Zack offered. "Shinra's ruined my friends and is getting more corrupt everyday. I want to help Cloud."

But the red-caped man just walked away, and before Zack's eyes he seemed to melt into the cape and then into nothingness.


	38. You're a Wolf, Boy, Get Out of Town

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cloud reaches Nibelheim while everything goes to hell for Reno. Meanwhile Sephiroth and Zack are picking up breadcrumbs.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THERE WILL BE A FINAL FANTASY VII REMAKE. I REPEAT, THIS IS NOT A DRILL; FFVII WILL BE REMADE FOR PS4 AND YOU CAN BET I WAS SHAKING AND SCREAMING WHEN I HEARD THE NEWS. So I replaying FFVII on PS3, re-watched Advent Children, listened to the whole soundtrack on repeat, and am writing again. If I don't finish Green Dreams by the time that remake is out I will never forgive myself.

Nibelheim was one of the last places on the planet Cloud wanted to see again and now he was there twice in three months.

He jumped off the back of the delivery truck as it pulled into the main square and stood by the entrance to the town, trying not to look at any of it. As though being here and _seeing_ Nibelheim could be two different things—in the same way that he felt like two different people here. A part of him was still the child who knew which gable was whose, which walks would be shoveled and who didn't bother, and the exact dent at shin height on the front post of the town's sign. He'd repeatedly kicked it as a kid because that sign had been the invisible line between him and anywhere else.

The rest of him was a stranger here now, and the town that had once smelt of pine, minerals, and frost was now tainted by the smell of burning skin and acidic smoke. The windows of the houses were like cut squares of light to a world he'd once known, but the flames flickering in fireplaces in the living rooms of those same homes reminded him of the burned Nibelheim he'd known. He took a breath and didn't know if it was wood smoke or burnt hair that he smelled but neither scent was comforting.

Cloud's gaze flicked to the indent in the rusting metal sign and darted away.

"Is that…?" An old woman with her shopping paused in the street to gape as Cloud briskly walked through the main square. She might have said his name but Cloud ignored her, unable to remember whom she was or having any desire to, and continued down the street. His cheeks and nose were blistering from the January frost and his fingers were completely numb, but it didn't compare to the cold inside him. He never wanted to be back in Nibelheim again.

Once upon a time he could have named every occupant of every house on this road, but as he curved around the center plaza and its circle of evergreens, he realized that even he had forgotten the people of Nibelheim who had died in the fire. The thought prickled, but without his mother here and with Tifa soon to be gone, Nibelheim held nothing for him. He was so removed from it now that it felt as unreal as the Potemkin village it had become before.

His gait didn't slow until he jerked to a stop just before the walk to the house. His house. No, not his house anymore. His childhood home was… tended to. Instead of looking ramshackle after being abandoned for the winter months, someone had obviously shoveled the walk and heated the inside because the windows weren't frosted, but instead cheery and bright. Cloud refused to look in the window and chance seeing another happy family where he and his mother had once been.

He didn't know how long he stood there staring at it until he heard the click of a door opening nearby. "Cloud?" an uncertain voice asked from the next house over, and he turned slowly to look at her. "Is that you? Cloud Strife?"

It was Tifa standing on the steps of her house. Her hair was longer than he remembered, and her outfit more fashionable than practical. She had the softer face of a woman who hadn't been throwing men out of her bar for a year, and it wasn't the face of the woman who had fought monsters both from this planet and others with him. Nonetheless the furiously built shell that Cloud had created inside himself on the long ride up to Nibelheim cracked.

"Tifa?" he asked.

"It's me! Do you remember me? Planet, you must be a SOLDIER now, huh?"

The girlish way she spoke jibbed with his memories of her. This wasn't _his_ Tifa, the one who had a life and career of her own and had been one of his closest friends despite his reluctance to ever act like one.

Cloud turned away. This was why he didn't want to come back to Nibelheim.

"I'm really sorry, Cloud, for your mother," she continued, not noticing or ignoring how he gave her his back. "Everyone was upset when they brought her back. She was… she was brave in the end."

"…"

"…Cloud?" she repeated softly.

He walked away. One night, he told himself. He'd spend one night in the inn to close his mother's affairs and find out the details. Before, his mother had been alive to see his disgrace when he came back to Nibelheim a foot soldier. Now she was dead and she hadn't been able to see her son become anything worthwhile. He couldn't decide which was worse.

Cloud had horrible nightmares that night, waking up sweating and hoarse, and then drifting off again only to jerk awake once more to the same haunting images. It was a bad start to a worse day. When he left the inn he found he was the gossip of the town, and when he went to Mayor Lockhart's house half of Nibelheim came out to see him. The children who had bullied him as boys were now awestruck adults. The elderly who remembered his mother arriving with a baby boy in tow and no husband to speak of talked behind their hands. The small town madness Cloud had grown up with had become more garish and disgusting than he had remembered.

Since Cloud hadn't come to claim anything the visit with the mayor was brief, and all but the most obviously personal possessions had been sold in an estate sale along with the house. What few things were his included a small photo album, a baby blanket covered in clouds with his name on it, and a necklace made of seashells set with one large pearl—the only gift his father had ever given her, except for Cloud, she would say. Elanor Strife had not left a will, but nonetheless the meager contents of her bank account and the sole box of possessions were given to him by the unsympathetic mayor.

Before he left though, Cloud turned the full force of his mako-bright eyes on the mayor. "Tell me what happened."

Tifa's father was pale and thin, with eyes too slight for his heavy jaw. He had frightened Cloud as a little boy, but now Cloud understood that Mayor Lockhart and the three hundred people of Nibelheim lived under the abiding fear of the outside. He was very small compared to the demons Cloud had faced after Nibelheim.

The mayor shuffled his papers nervously as he talked, eyes skittering about Cloud's outfit and sword. "She was up in the mountains, near the mako cave—not a good place to be, not at that time of year. She must have slipped and fallen. We'd been having ice storms as usual so not entirely surprising. Jacob found her at the bottom of the ravine gathering firewood. She'd been there all night and was in bad shape. She, well," the Mayor wiped his forehead with a handkerchief and looked unsteadily into Cloud's eyes. "She woke up a few times, but she was hypothermic, had a head wound and fractured back… She wasn't young, Cloud, as you know. And well, four days later she slipped away."

"What day?"

Mayor Lockhart had to check, and Cloud watched him steadily as he dug through folders and finally produced the death certificate. "November 8th."

Two days after the SOLDIER Exam was completed in the mountains. His mother must have fallen while he was in the very same mountain range.

The death certificated creased and folded in Cloud's fist. Lockhart watched the paper crumple nervously and banged his knee against his desk when he stood up to see Cloud out.

Cloud strode down the street, unable to see the townspeople gawking or hear how hard his boots hit the ground. He wanted to be alone to gather himself and he wanted to escape this place full of dead memories and echoes he didn't want to remember. He was starting to feel overwhelmed, and as he thought about his mother lying dying in a frozen ravine alone, he couldn't stop replacing her face with Aeris' in the lake and Zack's on the cliff. He'd failed someone in this time now, and not years apart, travel through space and time, or hope could dull the punch.

Tifa called his name three times before Cloud was able to hear her above the rattle in his chest as he breathed—did he want to cry or scream? "Cloud, up here!" she called again.

He glanced back to see Tifa standing on the boarded up well near the edge of town, the tree-line a bare ten feet away. The well had been covered up for as long as Cloud had been alive, and he and Tifa had climbed all over it as kids. It was there too that he'd said goodbye to her when he'd first left for SOLDIER. That was another memory he did not want to remember anymore.

"Cloud?" Tifa repeated, jumping down to the lower level with a bang. He jerked and looked away from her and the well. "I'm glad you stayed," she said.

"I'm not staying." He shook his head but refused to look at her. He felt edgy and raw, like a runner about to burst from the start line if one more thing pushed him.

"Cloud, you're in SOLDIER now, and congratulations! …Do you, do you remember what we promised here?"

He turned around and walked away.

"Cloud! Cloud wait! I'm going to tell my dad I'm going to Midgar next year! Cloud!"

He couldn't stand her girlish voice, the numerous promises he'd made and failed to keep, he couldn't stand being _here_ any longer. He pushed through the undergrowth and into the forest, ignoring Tifa's calls.

He climbed for hours up the ridges of the mountain, cutting his own path in most places when he wasn't cutting down beasts. None of them gave a very good fight though, and by the time he'd gotten into the icy, snowed-out parts of the mountains the very roars of the dragons were close enough to shake his bones. It was exactly what he wanted, feeding the fury inside him at the fear and helplessness he hated. He couldn't save his mother. He couldn't stop Nibelheim from dredging up all the memories he didn't want to remember. He couldn't be civil to Tifa. It felt like he couldn't even do what he'd come to this time to do because he'd dilly-dallied for so long. _Couldn't couldn't couldn't… just like the old can't can't can't he'd heard the first time._

He set down his bag and with vicious practicality pulled out two of the syringes of mako he still had. Cloud had to close his eyes as he prepped the syringe; the color of the mako swam behind his lids and made him dizzy to think about, but the rage ate even those feelings. He wanted to run until his legs gave out, claw his own skin off, and pick up his sword and cut and slash and slice until his muscles gave out under him; until all the emotion was gone.

With the roar of a dragon and a flash of fire from the next mountain peak Cloud stabbed himself in the arm with the first syringe. He couldn't even feel the burn of the mako from the adrenaline in his system.

When the vial was empty he threw it over the mountainside, panting and clenching his jaw as he prepped the second one. Already the mako was lighting up the veins in his arm, and he too felt like roaring with anger to hide his fear as the dragon called out again. The second jab went deeper, and when he pulled the syringe out and threw it away blood welled up from the entry sight. He smeared it with his thumb and felt the first rush of the mako. The mountain air didn't sting his throat so much, and his fingers started to lose some of their numbness, tingling with anticipation. All his senses sharpened and now it wasn't just his anger that pushed him aloft into weightless combat—it was mako and skill.

With a sword in each hand, mastered materia locked into both hilts, he kicked off from the mountainside and focused on one thing and one thing only: killing a dragon.

* * *

Time shuffled by and occasionally seemed to halt altogether for Zack. Sephiroth was busy with work and sounded like he wanted to get as much done as inhumanely possible so he could free his schedule to hunt for Cloud. Cloud was still gone at nine days and counting without a word. Zack had been stuck on Heidegger duty for most of that time, and otherwise had taken to actually reading his reports and training with Seconds to make time go by faster. When Zack's PHS finally lit up with a message – "Coffee at 10?" – he was actually looking forward to his fake date with the intern.

Her name was Claire. She was a redhead with a mind that would either propel her up the ranks of the scientists or screw her completely depending on her morals. Zack had been able to charm her into running a DNA analysis on the hair he'd gotten from that red-caped man. The First didn't care if she did end up being a mad scientist when she handed him an envelope with a wink.

"So whose is it?" she asked, nodding at the envelope with the flash drive inside it.

"Gonna have to run that and find out," Zack said with his most attractive smile, rolling his coffee cup between his hands. He remembered the instinct even if his fingers didn't get cold anymore. He could tell his choice of coffee shop was cold though from how she'd kept her scarf and gloves on.

Claire appraised his hands with a bold look in her eye. "Well I did, but nothing came up. Was it just an excuse?" she asked.

"Naw," Zack said with a wink, and she smiled back.

He walked away twenty minutes later knowing he'd feel a little guilty when he left on his next mission without seeing her again, then claim to be too busy to see her after that. Zack had other worries though, namely which computer would be safest to run this DNA on. He considered a number of them before realizing he had a Turk's computer handy already.

Reno didn't take kindly to the First appearing at his door, but Zack pushed his way in. "This is for Cloud," he explained, plugging the flash drive into the computer. Cables were poking out the back from where Reno had clearly rebuilt the thing, probably to stop any surveillance on it, but it ran smoothly and within a few clicks Zack had the Shinra database running.

"Look, Cloud's an idiot sometimes, I get it, but I'm not standing in for him while he's gone," Reno started, only to be completely ignored. "And I'm not a doormat," he complained.

Zack sat back as the program ran, analyzing the strand of DNA for matches in the Shinra system. Between his clearance and Reno's illicit clearance, they should be able to cover most anyone in the system. Zack couldn't be sure this would ping anything, but the clear enhancements the caped man had rang of either Shinra interference or Fuhito of AVALANCHE. Either way he'd have his answer.

"Cloud's been MIA for over a week now," Zack said casually, looking at Reno who was sitting on the edge of his bed. "Do you know where he is?"

"Probably in Nibelheim crying over his mother's grave," Reno spat back. "'Least that's what the bereavement request said."

Zack side-eyed him. "Any idea why he didn't tell you where he was going?"

Reno narrowed his eyes at Zack. "Because he knew I'd find out." There wasn't any doubt in Reno's voice.

"But he didn't think you could help him?" Zack asked, genuinely curious. He knew Cloud didn't want him and Sephiroth mixed up for their protection—whatever that meant—but he'd pulled Reno in willingly. So why wasn't Reno out there with Cloud?

Reno scoffed. "I'm more help to 'im here. I'm a Turk, not a SOLDIER. Not meant to be picking fights."

"Cloud's picking fights? With who?" Zack asked.

Reno cursed and looked pointedly away. Zack chewed on his cheek for a moment but didn't press. If Cloud really was picking fights, then he probably wasn't in Nibelheim; he'd destroyed whatever might be there the last time. Was this in some way related to those triplets he may have let loose? Or something else Hojo related? Or what about this red-caped man?

What was Cloud doing? Zack thought, refusing to feel hopeless about it. Was this in the name of his mentor's life? To fulfill a legacy? For revenge?

The computer beeped before Zack could get lost in the same existential question cycle he did every night laying in bed since he'd met the blond. Befriending Cloud did that to people.

The search had come back with a match—a Turk. Shinra-enhanced then, Zack thought triumphantly, which simplified things. Zack scrolled through the basic profile only to find some unanticipated information. "Well, he's a Turk, but… a very dead one. Also he can't actually be in his 50s…"

"What?" Reno asked, slipping off the bed and stealing the mouse to scroll up to the top of the page that Zack was on. It was a profile for Vincent Valentine, complete with a picture of a shaggy-haired, sullen man in a blue Turk suit. Reno recognized the name immediately.

"Cloud ever mention him?" Zack asked, leaning back in the stolen office chair.

"Guy's been dead for decades."

"He is very much alive and I'd stake his, mine, and your life on Hojo being involved in that," Zack argued, nearly breaking Reno's knuckle when he pried his hand off the mouse. "Last mission… last mission… security and protection duty of classified personnel, details of threat, classified, date and place of death: April 27, Nibelheim."

Zack exhaled with careful control. "So he did let someone out of the tanks," he murmured to himself.

"What the hell are you talking about?" Reno said, jerking on the back of the chair. "And what are you doing here looking this shit up? What's this got to do with Cloud?"

"A lot more than he's telling you or me," Zack interjected. "And I needed a bug free computer. Hey, do you have a printer?" It didn't matter anyway because Zack took pictures of the screen with his PHS, snapped the flash drive out of the computer before Reno could swap it with an identical one, and left with his patented mega-watt smile.

Reno slammed the door in his face and checked the elevator feed to be sure the First was leaving. The moment the elevator hit the next floor Reno shot Cloud a message.

_Your first showed up still a dick. knows about valentine and you_

* * *

Nibelheim was so remote that everyone still had landlines and most PHS service failed completely half an hour outside the village. It was fortunate then that Cloud had left a steaming dragon's carcass in the Nibel mountains and literally jumped on to the first truck driving out of Nibelheim. It would almost have been faster to walk with the way the car inched through the snow and ice, but each skid down the road took him that much farther from a town he sincerely hoped to never see again.

So it was that a day later Reno's text found him in the Gold Saucer, which had excellent PHS service and little information regarding the three intruders who'd killed several guards. Cloud closed his eyes when he saw Reno's message and was quietly thankful that he wasn't there in person to hear the "I told you so" about Zack going digging for information. How the First found out about Vincent Cloud had no idea, but this almost didn't surprise him anymore.

That didn't stop Zack from messaging him four more times that day and calling twice asking about Vincent, where Cloud was, and if he was all right. Cloud refused to do more than glance at Zack's number before ignoring. He couldn't quite delete them though.

Vincent did not mention meeting Zack when he messaged Cloud early the next morning, but his news was much more urgent. He'd tapped into some Turk reports and learned the Triplets were on the move. The latest report was only forty minutes old and pointed directly at Mideel.

The Gold Saucer had one other thing going for it besides excellent PHS service: giant parking lots populated by fancy cars owned by Shinra shareholders and executives. Cloud had no compunction about stealing the fastest motorcycle in the lot. It didn't have any of the modifications of Fenrir, but it purred beneath him as he sped out of the city for the docks. Just before he hit the last gear he sent his own message to Vincent.

_Zack on to you_

* * *

The news that Cloud was not only getting into fights with some unknown entity, but that he was working with a formerly dead Turk of considerable skill put Sephiroth in a perplexing mood. He already felt like he was missing enough holes in Cloud's story, but the Turk was another wrench. Any information the Turk had was twenty-five years out of date, before Cloud was even born, so they were working together because the Turk could scout and physically back Cloud up. Those were things that respectively Reno, Sephiroth and Zack could do. And yet they remained out of the loop and now completely cut off. Sephiroth felt… annoyed at Cloud's rejection of their friendship. That didn't seem to encompass the feeling entirely, but he'd never really felt this sensation before.

"What if Cloud's not seventeen?" Zack said suddenly, interrupting the silence as Sephiroth looked at the pictures Zack had taken of Valentine's profile. He didn't dare look the man up himself with how bugged his computer was. The Turks and Hojo would probably be very interested to know why he cared. "Valentine didn't look a day over thirty and he's obviously a hell of a lot older. What if Cloud's older than seventeen? I mean, has anyone actually gone to Nibelheim to check? Did anyone ask for an original birth certificate? If he's from such a small town it'd be easy enough to forge one. In fact, him being way older would explain _a lot_. Maybe he and Valentine are the same age. They might have known each other from before Valentine went down, and that's why they're working together now. Both with grudges against Hojo would make sense."

Sephiroth sighed and tamped down on the urge to pace. Zack had fortunately caught him on his way out of the office dressed for training. Sephiroth didn't think he could sit still much longer with how fast his thoughts were going. "Enough, Zack. I have done nothing but think on this for weeks now. Cloud had caused me nothing but headaches and…" he grasped for the word to describe the wound in his chest from being told of Cloud's new ally but couldn't find one.

"Seph?"

Brushing it off, Sephiroth picked up Masamune and gestured Zack at the door. Zack's eyes narrowed.

"Headaches and…?"

"I do not like his lack of trust for us. I do not want to be coddled by a Third Class SOLDIER, skilled or not. We have offered him every opportunity of help and friendship and he has rejected us at every turn. I'm—"

"Hurt," Zack supplied, but stopped whatever else he was going to say when Sephiroth pulled away sharply. The man was clearly aware of how vulnerable that one word made him and didn't like the feeling.

They both hesitated at the door before Sephiroth stepped through and closed it behind Zack, metaphorically shutting the door on that conversation. "I am going to see if I can have words with this Vincent Valentine," Sephiroth said.

"You sure you'll be able to find him?" Zack asked. "He didn't seem the sort who wants to be found."

Sephiroth didn't particularly care if he found Valentine tonight, but when he got on the elevator going down alone, he opened up his PHS again to look at the pictures of the Turk's profile Zack had sent him.

There were too many loose threads with Cloud and too little that Sephiroth could do to solve them. So far he had Hojo and Cloud as the only places he could go to for answers, and neither of them would be willing to share for almost any price. Sephiroth privately thought he could get Cloud to talk, but it would cost him more than he was willing to give—and he refused to imagine what destroying his relationship with Cloud would mean. Hojo was a dead-end as far as he was concerned.

Valentine presented a new opportunity. Formerly a Turk, making him talk would be hard, but it was a possibility that couldn't be left untouched. Not to mention that Sephiroth could not quite get the image of his face out of his mind. He couldn't have known the man even as a babe, but there was a familiarity to it that made Sephiroth uncomfortable.

From the garage Sephiroth took one of the private jeeps to a drop-point, one of the handful of areas in the plate where it was open to the city below. Most SOLDIERs didn't get down this way, but Sephiroth was too much a celebrity and in far too strange a mental place to bother with the train. He dropped hard on to the roof of a building fifty feet below the plate, and continued jumping down to lower roofs and balconies until he was in the underbelly of Midgar.

Sephiroth didn't think going back to the Sector 7 church would so easily turn up Valentine a second time, but kicking a few low-level fiends around in the trainyard did surprisingly get his attention. Or more likely, Valentine was looking for him. Sephiroth was not wholly surprised. Why else would Cloud leave his best asset behind in Midgar if not to keep an eye on Zack and him?

"Sephiroth," the man said in a gravely voice, slightly bitten off at the end. It was hard to tell if it was a greeting, warning, or simple a statement.

"Valentine." Sephiroth inclined his head at the pool of shadow that was the man. He'd felt those red eyes on him for the last hour but hadn't been able to pinpoint from where. The man obviously had a lot of training and significant enhancements. Not that Sephiroth feared he couldn't beat him in a fight.

"You know Cloud," Sephiroth started.

"…"

"How do you know him?"

"He knows me," Valentine said, still scrutinizing Sephiroth's face. Sephiroth couldn't see much of the Turk's except for the sharp line of jaw and a steep nose.

"You know where he is," Sephiroth said.

"Why do you care?" Valentine responded, finally stepping out of the shadows. He was clothed exactly how Zack described: black outfit, red tattered cape, gold shoes and claw, and a melancholic expression.

"Cloud is my friend."

"Is he?" Valentine said drily. "Then listen to him. Stay out of it."

The ex-Turk turned around and disappeared into a train car, his footsteps disappearing long before they should have for Sephiroth's hearing. Sephiroth kept thinking about that meeting long after he'd wiped out anything moving in the train graveyard and returned to his office desk. There, he weighed the risks and opened up a private network, an encrypted web server, and then went through a dozen more security hoops he could think of just in case, before running a search for Valentine. The exact same profile came up after an extended wait.

Then on a whim Sephiroth couldn't explain the origin of, he opened up a private folder on his server. Inside was the DNA analysis of the unnamed man who Hojo had simple labeled as "Male Sperm Donor". Sephiroth hadn't run it through the system. He hadn't wanted to know the name of the man who had abandoned him; the man he'd feared had been a scientist no better than Hojo.

This time he did hit search.

* * *

Four days after Zack's abrupt commandeering of Reno's computer, Reno, Rude, and a handful of SOLDIERs stood on the walls of Fort Condor wondering how everything had hit the industrial-sized fan.

The reports had all agreed that the three identical men—codenamed the Triplets because no one could find their origin or names—had been headed for Mideel. Their exact motive was unknown except that they were searching for family, and even that was disputed. A "mother" and "brother" were the only cited words, but no one quite knew who or what that meant.

No one really knew anything about them, as it turned out. That was why Reno was holding a gun and his nightstick in each hand and shooting frantic looks at Rude.

"When can we get out of here? When's the damn extraction?"

"On its way," Rude grunted. He kept twitching his head just slightly to glance at the SOLDIERs, a tell giving away how nervous he was too. They were _way_ out of their depth and they both knew it.

The first attacks had started on the outskirts when a patrol was wiped out suddenly. All of them were Thirds assigned to Fort Condor. They looked to have been trampled and ripped apart by fiends, but there were suspicious tire tracks nearby. Two hours later three silver-haired men were spotted from the watchtowers making their way up the path to the fort. Seconds were sent down to confront them. None came back.

"Oh man, oh man, oh man," Reno muttered loudly, staring down at the carnage happening below. The three men were hardly a hundred yards from the front gates now and fighting waves of soldiers.

Watching the Triplets fight proved to Reno that they were hopelessly outmatched. Not only were the three men separately deadly, but they also worked together seamlessly, tag-teaming any squads that confronted them. They used each other to leap up, to dodge attacks, and to knock SOLDIERs between them like a pinball, utterly without remorse. It was like a sick gameto them, and Reno had seen some messed up shit but watching these guys on a rampage was terrifying.

Not to mention they alone were only doing half the damage. They could summon some kind of hellish demon wolf with a skull head and paws with foot-long claws and blade like extensions. The beasts ripped to shreds whoever the three men didn't kill themselves, leaving a trail of dismembered bodies behind. Others along the wall were raining down fire in between curses, but it didn't seem to frustrate the Triplets much. Someone detonated a landmine, but all it did was blow some demon wolves to smoke and make it even harder to see what was going on below.

The First in charge of the fort was starting to look really pissed. Bors had the command of all of these men and he was losing them rapidly, sometimes three or four in a minute. Reno could sympathize with his anger, but he also wasn't going to die with them like the First looked ready to do. Reno and Rude were Turks; they weren't meant for this kind of fighting.

"They've reached the wall!" someone shouted from the edge, and Reno cocked his gun as he ran over. Something came clawing and scrabbling from below just as he reached the edge, and he looked down into the maw of a beast as someone nearby shouted, "Above you!"

The monsters were materializing out of thin air as they were summoned, coming out of smoke and landing as blood and bone. Reno went white-faced as the one climbing the wall lumbered over the lip and stuck it in the face with a punch, shattering teeth and cracking the protective skull. The wolf demon shook off the blow and lunged, scattering Reno, Rude, and the Second who'd called the warning. Reno's nightstick was barely strong enough to ward off a swipe from one paw as the three of them worked to take it down. A well-timed blow from the Second was enough to cut most of the head off, turning the thing back into smoke.

There were more upon them before they could breathe. Two more identical monsters, attacked, parried, swiped, and ducked around them, one of them finally getting under the Second's sword. The thing bit down on his leg and dragged him to the ground before Reno and Rude could jump in. To the man's credit he didn't scream, but he had to be in agony as he pulled out his knife and rammed it under the skull protecting the beast's head. He'd nearly ripped it off there, and the awesome strength of the Second would have wowed Reno if another monster hadn't appeared at that exact moment. The SOLDIER was on his own as Reno was thrown to the ground and his nightstick jammed into that face full of teeth. The electricity shocked the creature long enough for Rude to kick it off Reno and deal a brutal blow to the spine that crippled it before it turned into smoke.

"I am not qualified for this!" Reno yelled as Rude dragged him up and started to run along the wall. More of the creatures were everywhere, and they were constantly fending off renewed attacks. By the time they reached the stairs at the back of the fort, Reno was cramping up on his left side and he had a gash on his leg he didn't remember getting. As they ran he saw only glimpses of the battle. People on the wall were being swarmed by the fiends while below the First whirled and lashed with his whip and blade against two of the Triplets. Seconds nearby were trying and mostly failing to hold off the third member who wielded a double-bladed sword and was slashing through them with frightening brutality.

"This isn't good!" Reno yelled at Rude over the sounds of an explosion, covering his face with his arms. When he chanced a glance at the battlefield he saw a huge rip in the earth where the biggest silver-haired man had set off a small earthquake. Two more infantrymen were dead and the Triplets swapped positions so now the First had the gunman and the swordsman attacking him. He was slowly being forced into the stairs below. His allies were dwindling if the body count looked as bad as Reno thought.

"You're right," Rude said instead of a deadpan quip, confirming Reno's fears. It was a bad sign if Rude couldn't be sarcastic with him.

Another Second and more Thirds were dead on the parapets behind them as they climbed to the helipad. They could still hear yelling and the sounds of a Thunder3 but neither Turk could afford to look back. At the top of the helipad was a wolf monster ripping the head off an unfortunate infantryman.

"Shit," Reno said, readying his nightstick. Rude stepped into position.

The beast was cruel and quick, and Reno could barely keep up. He'd clearly lost some of his edge after leaving SOLDIER training, and Rude's hits were doing only enough damage to win them time. The two jumped back after several fruitless minutes where they didn't leave a scratch and only barely avoid being gutted themselves.

"Alright, you go low, I'll go high, and maybe I can jam the—"

Machine gun fire burst onto the platform, blowing chunks of flesh out of the monster until it smoked up and disappeared. Whipping around to look at the helicopter Reno nearly whacked Rude in the face with his nightstick. The beating of the rotors was deafening when it got into range, but Rude started signing with his arms to the pilot not to land. A rope ladder was instead thrown down and Reno jumped on before Rude could even grab it, scrabbling up like a monkey.

"Anyone else alive down there?" the pilot yelled at Reno when he'd buckled himself in and given Rude a hand up. Reno looked down from the side of the copter but it was hard to tell what was going on. Battlefields were chaotic at the best of times, and the inside of the fort was cramped for fighting. Nonetheless someone was still giving the Triplets a hard time down below.

Rude grabbed a gun and leveled it down the ladder while the man at the machinegun opened fire inside the fort's courtyard, giving whoever was left some space. It was hard to tell who was left alive, but as the ladder swept near the staircase Bors lunged and caught on, his purple uniform stained brown and red and smoldering. The pilot immediately pulled up and away before the three invaders could jump on too.

Rude dragged the First on board and sat him down in a seat. The man was missing his eyebrows from an explosion, several teeth, and his right ear. He kept breathing hard even though ever breath made him wince and hiss against broken ribs.

"They wiped out my team," Bors managed when he'd had some water and a few Cure spells cast on him. He still wasn't breathing easily but at least most of the superficial scrapes were gone and the bloody hole of his ear had stopped bleeding. "Never seen anything like it."

"Except Sephiroth," Reno said. At Rude's glance he shrugged. "What? Everyone's thinking it. Three silver-haired guys who wipe out Seconds like they're made of paper?"

The First shook his head in denial then groaned and squeezed his eyes shut. "No sharp turns," he said in the general direction of the pilot. Then the inside of the helicopter fell into an ashen silence, as it seemed to sink in on them all at once what had happened. Three survivors of a fort that held fifty men. All of them covered in blood and gore and thoroughly traumatized.

"Well this sucks," Reno said, his wit and sarcasm his only barrier between normality and a breakdown. Turning in his seat he grudgingly snapped some photos with his PHS of the wreckage of Fort Condor and sent them to Tseng with the quip, _Wish you were here_.

Sitting back though, he had to wonder if destruction like this was anything like what Cloud had witnessed in his future. The blond had talked about the annihilation of Midgar; of the burning of his entire hometown; of an earthquake rending Mideel in half. Reno thought he had a much better understanding of why the blond was trying so hard to stop it now. Thinking of that, he sent one picture to Cloud's PHS with the line _three silver haired did it_

* * *

Cloud was unfortunately nowhere near Fort Condor as this was happening. He had been forced to take a boat back to the Midgar area because of checkpoints going into Junon. "Dangerous and Wanted Criminals" had been spotted in the area, and tellingly Third Class SOLDIERs were doing the patrols. Hollander or Genesis must have been here recently. Cloud considered trying to get through, but he didn't want to bring any attention to himself when no doubt Sephiroth and Zack were keeping an eye out for him. So he was barely an hour out of Midgar's port when the picture of the smoldering remnants of Fort Condor reached him. He stopped his stolen bike dead in the desert to look a little harder at it.

_50 dead probly,_ was the next message from Reno, followed by _only first survived fight._ Having fought Kadaj, Loz, and Yazoo on multiple occasions Cloud wasn't surprised by the numbers. SOLDIER wasn't ready for anything that could compete with its enhancements. That's why Sephiroth had cleaned through them so quickly.

Cloud snapped the PHS closed and squeezed it in his hand. Did he still go to Mideel? If a First Class SOLDIER could barely survive fighting the Remnants could Cloud defeat them? Before, in another time, it would have been an easier answer, but now he didn't know. If he didn't go there though, he had nowhere else to go but back to Midgar, which would be a dangerous prospect. Yes, he'd have access to mako, but he'd also have Zack and Sephiroth on his heels if they didn't just lock him up until he talked. He'd take a seemingly hopeless fight over that.

Decision made, Cloud turned back on to the road that looped around Midgar. It was the same road he'd ridden in a yellow pick-up truck with Zack long ago. The memory made him bite the inside of his cheek to stem whatever else might slip through the cracks.

It took most of the day to reach the cliff overlooking Midgar, but Cloud slowed to a stop a distance from it, parked the bike, and walked the last few hundred yards. He hadn't been here since before going back in time.

It looked the same. The ground was dusty and cracked for want of rain, and the rocks gathered together in clusters, sandy and giving off waves of heat in the sun. Cloud couldn't quite find the niche where Zack had tucked him that fateful day, but he felt like he could nearly see the footsteps where the soldiers had marched, hemming them on to the cliff's edge.

Beyond the edge was the outline of Midgar, Shinra's Headquarters jutting up into the sky like a finger to a god. Cloud thought it was a mirage at first when he looked across the cliff, but where Shinra HQ rose sharply on the horizon something else was there too in his direct line of sight.

It took Cloud a moment. And then another before he realized he'd stopped walking.

It was a sword planted blade-first in the ground. Even from a distance he knew that wasn't Galatine, the one that Cloud had left here before. It was a differently shaped hilt, the curve of the blade more pronounced, the color just a bit more white-silver.

It was First Tsurugi's main blade.

_How? Why?_

Cloud didn't even realize he'd propelled himself forward until his hand fitted around the grip, every groove and crevice perfectly matching his hand. The hilt was bulky and square to accommodate the five swords that could be attached, and the blade was double-sided and tapered to a point at the end. Pulling it out of the ground smoothly, Cloud hefted the weight with one hand then two. It was a bit awkward and heavy with just one, but with two he held it in the ready position and felt the twitches of a smile on his face. First Tsurugi. His sword. With a familiar flick of a finger the blade split down the middle to expand into its battle-ready mode.

The twin razor-edged swords he had gotten at the port slotted neatly into the hilt, and while incomplete First Tsurugi was halfway there. His blade was nearly ready for battle.

The thought made him pause, and Cloud looked down at the sword in his hand. Was he almost ready too? He didn't like to believe in signs or read too much into coincidences, but this had been arranged for him somehow, just like it had before, when he'd found the complete First Tsurugi days after Meteor. Had Tifa been right in the time before, that she was always with them? Was she still here despite bending time itself?

_Aeris?_

He tilted the blade enough to see his reflection on the shined edge. The mirror image wasn't clear, but a mop of blond hair and bright mako-blue eyes looked back at him. The same face he'd seen before in Galatine and Ultima Weapon.

_I have to do this_ , he thought. If SOLDIER couldn't deal with the Remnants and Cloud didn't dare let Zack or Sephiroth get involved, then only he could handle it. He was the only one with the strength to do this.

In a pouch buried at the bottom of one of the motorcycle's compartments were the last two syringes of mako. Would it be cruel irony to do this here? Cloud wondered vaguely as he pulled them out. Or was this fitting really? Here he had promised to live for them both, he and Zack. And he'd messed that up royally.

_Enough_.

Cloud pulled out the syringes and prepped them, feeling more clear-headed than he ever had doing this, which made it that much harder. Even when he held his arm out, vein apparent, and held the needle to it, his fingers trembled and more than once Cloud had to look down at the blade in the dirt and look into those eyes. Those were _his_ eyes. To save the people he loved and to shut down the corruption in the world he had to do this even if mako made him want to be violently ill at even a glance.

Deep breaths. In and out. Relax the muscle. And… in.

It felt like warm honey pooling in his arm as he depressed the syringe. Cloud had to look away as he did it, breathing raggedly into his other arm. One down. One more to go.

The second one was no easier. His hand shook harder this time, and he had to lay his arm on his lap to steady himself enough to inject. He stared ahead at the smoking city of Midgar and thought _for Zack and Sephiroth_ as he pushed more mako into his bloodstream.

He didn't remember falling asleep or when it began to rain, or even if it had rained. It might have been hours since he'd arrived, or perhaps the longest minute of his life, Cloud couldn't tell. The dirt under his cheek was rough and sticky, and with each exhale he breathed some in until he sat up coughing. Cloud felt woozy and sick, like he might throw up. It took precious minutes for his eyes to focus, for his head to clear enough to look farther than his own lap, but when he did he regretted it.

It was Zack. His face was bloodied, hair askew, and uniform patchy with bullet holes. Cloud vomited on to the ground until his stomach wouldn't heave anymore, but every time his eyes wandered up they landed on Zack. When there was nothing else to throw up, Cloud crawled closer.

_Zack? … Zack?_

Cloud could barely hold himself up high enough to look down at Zack, but he did his best with shaking arms, staring down confusedly and then with growing horror into glassy blue eyes. "Za…?" he tried, coughing over the name, starting to breathe harder and faster. _ZACK?_

The buster sword laid tossed aside three feet away. Zack couldn't reach it to hand it to Cloud. He couldn't hand it to Cloud because there was no light in those eyes. No trust. No love. No friendship. Nothing.

Cloud collapsed face-first on to Zack's still chest and couldn't even find the tears he wanted to shed.

"I was supposed to be your life," he cried into that bloody uniform, now cracked and hard from dried blood. How long had Zack lain here? A day and night like his mother? An eternity like Aeris in the lake? "I was supposed to be your pride and your dream. I _was_ you, Zack. I was going to save you; be the hero you were for me."

After that the hallucinations got blurry, more easily lost to unconscious memory. Kadaj, Loz, and Yazoo were there sometimes, taunting and laughing at him, reminding their _brother_ of being a puppet of Jenova. Sometimes Sephiroth was standing on the cliff looking alternately worried for him or wild-eyed and mad with power. Other times there was Aeris, who never said anything but watched over him as he cried and screamed, over Zack's body, Sephiroth's, and even over his own. Eventually Cloud got so tired and so confused that he curled up into a ball and wished that it would all just stop, that the itching would stop and the memories would stop and Sephiroth would be normal and Zack would be his friend and AVALANCHE would be safe and it would all be right.

But it wasn't. And when he woke up a day later, covered in bloody scratches from his own fingernails, dried urine, snot and tears, Cloud felt a little more destroyed inside. He didn't know if he had the strength to keep doing this, but he didn't see another way—he needed to be strong enough to defeat the Remnants and Jenova, right?

His promise to keep Zack and Sephiroth out of this was getting harder.


	39. Exposure

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cloud returns to Midgar unwillingly, and two people learn some of the truth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Every time I reread this I add bits to sentences and change a few things, and at this point I just need to stop. I'm still very mixed about the characterizations in this chapter, but I wanted to get this up in good time because this'll be TWO Green Dreams chapters in a single month, and that hasn't happened in a long time. So cheers! I cannot wait until that remake comes out!

"Where is Mother?" Loz yelled, shaking the last living soldier while Kadaj smashed whatever hadn't already been crushed, burnt, or pulverized around the outpost. Yazoo yawned behind his hand and leaned against the bloodstained wall to watch. The fat man and his red-dressed angel had told them Mother was near here, but Yazoo wasn't surprised that sniveling man in the lab coat had lied.

"I don't feel her," Kadaj whined when he got bored and wandered back over to his brother. "This is taking too long. Mother is waiting."

"Don't cry, Kadaj," Yazoo said condescendingly.

"I told you we should have asked brother."

"Brother's looking for her too," Yazoo reminded him. "And if we ask him then he might tell our other—" Kadaj snarled like a rabid dog to cut him off.

" _We_ will bring Mother to him just as she wants, and then _I_ will be the favorite. Why does she like him so much anyway? He doesn't even love her like we do!" Kadaj's voice cracked and Yazoo watched impassively as their most spirited brother started kicking a dead body, childishly angry at what he couldn't understand. Glancing the other way, Yazoo saw Loz still demanding answers from the soldier. Eventually he shook the man so hard his head snapped back with a crack and the soldier went limp.

"You broke him," Yazoo sighed, and Loz dropped the body and lumbered over.

"Mother's not here," he said redundantly. Her presence was no brighter here than it had been on the other continent. The mako reactor had given them hope, but even after slaughtering their way inside there hadn't been anything interesting.

"She wouldn't forgive that fat man for lying," Kadaj whined, looking over the horizon at the oncoming truck. "When he gets here I say we show him what Mother would do."

"And the angel?" Yazoo asked, remembered that one-winged man. He was infinitely more dangerous than the bearded man in the lab coat.

"We rip his wing off of course," Kadaj said gleefully.

* * *

SOLDIERs typically patrolled the roads around Midgar, but it looked like they were slacking off or had been called away. Cloud had been forced to fight off several fiends, and he'd driven through at least one herd of something with six legs that were thankfully not fast enough to catch him.

He'd been using his speed and agility from the bike to deal with every monster in his way, but behind the next blind corner was something Cloud couldn't take on one-handed. Standing in the middle of the road was an Aps, and as Cloud came around the bend his reflexes kicked into action and he jerked the bike to the side, veering off to the right so sharply skid marks cut across the dirt road.

The stolen bike wasn't Fenrir though, and the shocks couldn't handle the stress of the move, so Cloud didn't make it ten feet past the Aps before the bike tilted too far and he was thrown off. He cracked a tooth as he hit the ground and rolled, hearing the dull banging of metal as the motorcycle bounced and finally stopped skidding some forty yards away. The Aps had been surprised by Cloud's appearance, so the blond had time to stand up and wipe away the blood on his mouth before the creature could figure out what had happened. One glance at the bike showed a blown out back tire, completely twisted handlebars, and a dent in one of the fuel tanks. Great, he'd have to walk.

The Aps turned fully to the blond and crouched at the ready, letting out a bellow as a warning that shook the small rocks on the ground. Not intimidated, Cloud readied First Tsurugi and charged. Fire3 did significant damage to the hide, and while the Aps was still batting flames away from its face, Cloud neatly separated tail and torso. The monster shrieked at such a high octave Cloud had to abandon the follow-up attack to get some distance for his ringing eardrums.

That was a lucky shot though, as the Aps wasn't stupid enough to let him get that close again. It fought more defensively, and that forced Cloud to rely more on magic and feints, avoiding those sharp tusks on the monsters shoulders that it tried more than once to gore him on. Cloud was nimble, but he couldn't maintain the anti-gravity fighting he'd always used before, so the endless leaping and jumping around to avoid swipes and poison breath were wearing on him. The battle dragged out long enough that the patrol finally showed up.

"Get back!" Cloud heard, and he barely flicked his head over to see three SOLDIERs in dusty uniforms running into the fray. He ignored them in favor of switching his grip and launching a one-handed blow to the face of the monster. First Tsurugi cut every time, but Cloud wasn't up to his old standards yet, so what should have been a savage blow ending up nicking the monster across its bloated cheek and bursting one of its venom sacks. Cloud landed on the other side of the Aps angry, yanking off the sleeve that the poison had splattered on.

The SOLDIERs reached him at the moment. "Ice2!" yelled one Second, sending down a shower of icicles that the monster brushed off with annoyance. Another ran over to him holding a Restore materia, but Cloud waved him off.

"It's weak to fire!" the blond shouted, shaking his head at the Seconds who took up a standard formation of attack. They were much easier to hit that way for the clumsy Aps, so after a second-long breather, Cloud returned to the battle. He ducked and dodged around to the backside of the monster to give it a distraction from the easily targeted Seconds.

The Seconds peppered the beast with blows on the front, their teamwork obviously well practiced, and one of them at least was very accurate with his gun, hitting the Aps in one cloudy eye to wrenched another yelp of pain out of the monster. Cloud hacked off a claw and crisscrossed the Aps' back with deep cuts amidst rounds of Fire until finally the creature started to stagger. One Second took the initiative and jumped, blade straight out, and stabbed the Aps directly in the heart. It wasn't a fast way to kill such a monster though, so when it collapsed to the ground in a cloud of dust it continued to wiggle like a fish on a hook before finally laying still.

Cloud set First Tsurugi on his back as the Seconds got their breath back, one looking a little green as the Aps gave a full body shudder before the nervous system gave out. Cloud thought about walking away then and there, but before he'd decided one SOLDIER came around the fiend and called to him. "Cloud Strife, right?"

Cloud nodded warily.

"You heading to Midgar? Looks like your bike's totaled." It was the one who'd slain the beast who spoke to him. The man pulled off his helmet to reveal an unremarkable face and introduced himself, before waving at the creature. "You really are the Lieutenant General's apprentice, huh? Hardly needed our help!" When Cloud didn't respond he scratched the top of his head and shrugged awkwardly. "Well, we're reporting back to Midgar, so jump in our truck and we'll take you back."

"I have a delivery to make first," Cloud lied, starting to walk back to his bike. Maybe salvaging the tire would be possible after all, and he could transfer the fuel from the dented tank to the undamaged one.

"You can't walk through the desert to wherever you're going," argued that Second again. Cloud had forgotten his name as soon as he'd said it. "Midgar's the closest city and you won't get in by tonight on foot, assuming you make it at all. That creature there," he said, pointing at the fallen Aps, "that's nothing compared to what comes out at night. Even Seconds have to move in groups of three."

Cloud hunched his shoulders. His plan had simply been to go to Mideel and see what he could find, but it didn't look like he was going to get away from these SOLDIERs. He could steal their truck maybe, but there were probably more inside and then he'd be wanted again by SOLDIER.

Cloud shook his head. "I really—"

The Second sighed before straightening up and adopting a formal military posture. "Third Class Cloud Strife, you are hereby ordered to return to Midgar in the safety of your peers. Do you understand?"

"You're ordering me?" Cloud asked, bewildered. No one had ever pulled rank like this before on him, and he didn't even feel like a member of Shinra's SOLDIER anymore. It was like a raccoon was telling him off for littering.

"Are you resisting orders?" the Second said warningly.

Cloud looked back at the bike, but really there wasn't any hope for it. It wasn't going to drive, and he couldn't outrun a truck, so it looked like he was going back to Midgar. He closed his eyes and turned back to the Seconds.

"No, sir."

* * *

Sephiroth sighed and stood up, checking his disgust as he always did. Hojo didn't ask a lot of him very often, but when the scientist demanded his presence somewhere it was in Sephiroth's best interest to show up. Skipping physicals and tests meant Hojo made them all the more rigorous and invasive the next time.

The email was succinct: _Sephiroth, I have a test for you on the 67_ _th_ _floor. No sword needed._

Sephiroth strapped Masamune on anyway to annoy the scientist and headed out. At least he knew this couldn't be a long test, as Hojo knew the General was shipping out. As Sephiroth was waiting for the elevator and considering the best ways to quickly leave Hojo's upstairs lab, Zack's office door burst open. He strode out talking excitedly on his PHS.

"Seriously? No, seriously, right now?" Zack repeated, turning almost to knock on Sephiroth's door before spotting the General. He started waving frantically at his phone and Sephiroth felt the stirrings of a headache.

"Zachary…" he said with an undeniable growl in his voice. He had to meet with Hojo before their departure in one hour for Fort Condor and he wanted to get the former done so he could enjoy the latter. The rage Hojo typically built up in him would be perfect if they encountered the Triplets.

"Seph! Seconds just reported in that they have _Cloud_! They're patching me into their leader's comms right now!" Zack was vibrating and he couldn't seem to stop bouncing on his toes.

Sephiroth actually stopped short of stepping into the newly arrived elevator. He hadn't actually believed Cloud would return to Midgar. Neither of them had said it, but with the two week grace period nearly up they'd been ready to take any made-up mission they could get to the Nibelheim area. Cloud coming back of his own accord was, well… confusing. What did he have to gain by returning to Midgar except perhaps access to Hojo? Or had he returned for Sephiroth and Zack?

"Yes, this is Lieutenant-General Zack Fair. You've got Cloud there? _My_ Cloud? Put him on then!" Zack waited impatiently as no doubt the PHS was handed over in a crowded transport unit. "Cloud? Cloud?"

Muffled but audible: "Zack?"

"Hey man, how's it going? How'd you end up with a bunch of Seconds? No wait, scratch that, how was leave? Glad you'll be back soon!" Zack was doing a very poor job of hiding his relief, or perhaps he wasn't trying at all.

"I'm fine; bike was destroyed by a fiend so I hitched a ride."

"I wish I could see you when you get back, but Seph and I are leaving for a mission. We'll be airborne before you get in, but you know where I hid my key if you want the apartment to yourself." Zack's giddiness was gradually fading now, and he met Sephiroth's eyes before he continued. "How was it?" he asked.

"Fine," Cloud said shortly, seeming determined not to answer the question. He didn't say anything more, which made Zack silently huff.

"Hey, wanna talk to Seph? He's right here." Zack passed the PHS over before Cloud could respond.

"Cloud, I hope you've improved while away," Sephiroth said, trying to think of anything to say at all. He didn't want to make Cloud clam up before he'd even stepped foot back in Midgar, but Sephiroth also didn't know how to express the unnamable feeling in his chest at confirmation of Cloud's return.

"Yeah, fought a few fiends," the blond replied.

"You will be ready for duty upon arrival?" Sephiroth asked, and Zack rolled his eyes.

"Yeah."

"I look forward to seeing your improvement personally when I return."

"Right, yeah," Cloud said, sounding uncomfortable now. Satisfied that he'd suitably warned Cloud of their pending meeting, Sephiroth handed the PHS back over to Zack.

"Hey Cloud, we're heading out in less than an hour so we won't see you. I'll leave some money in the apartment so you can order something since I bet you're starving and broke. Seph's heading—where are you going actually?"

"The labs," Sephiroth said, lip curling a little.

"Don't—!" he heard on the phone, before Cloud cut himself off.

"Don't what?" Sephiroth said, taking the PHS back from a surprised looking Zack.

"… Don't go to the labs. Just go on the mission."

Sephiroth's eyebrows went up, and he and Zack shared a look. "Speaking of the mission, Cloud, you may be able to provide insight." Sephiroth paused, but Cloud didn't say anything. Sephiroth could just barely hear his controlled breathing on the other end. "Three silver-haired men with powerful abilities destroyed Fort Condor two nights ago. Do you—"

Cloud hung up.

Sephiroth and Zack glanced at each other. "He definitely knows them," Zack finally said, sounding completely unsurprised.

Sephiroth looked down at the PHS with a mixture of annoyance and resignation. "Yes. Unfortunately, delaying the search to interrogate him would be more dangerous at this stage. Bors, Geatan, and Kunsel say they have a lead, and I do not want to risk the chance that they cannot handle the Triplets," Sephiroth replied. He handed back Zack's PHS and glanced at the elevator button to go up. He hesitated for a second, knowing he was supposed to be on the 67th floor to meet Hojo, but instead he pushed the down button and joined Zack on his way to ground floor.

* * *

Midgar stunk worse than Cloud remembered, a side effect of his increased mako levels. His senses had sharpened considerably, so now every garbage heap in the slums didn't just smell of trash, but of rust, mold, rot, and feces. Cloud didn't know how the Seconds could stand it as they drove up the highway and out of the underbelly of Midgar on to the plate.

They rolled into the SOLDIER garage and dropped the transport off. Cloud left the group immediately and bee-lined for Zack's apartment. He and Sephiroth should be long gone by now, which would give Cloud enough time to regroup, rest, and leave again. This time with a proper bike.

Four hours after a dinner of pizza from Zack's favorite place and in the middle of a nap, someone knocked on the door.

Cloud jerked awake immediately and tensed, reaching for First Tsurugi lying against the wall next to the bed.

"Cloooooud, it's me!" Reno yelled through the door, banging on it again. "C'mon, I had to find out you were back in Midgar because your buddy First penciled you in for a training session. Really? Lame dude," Reno complained as Cloud shuffled to the door. He opened it enough to see red hair before Reno pushed through and glanced around as he went for the couch.

"Huh, not a bad place actually. Loving the giant TV. Except, what happened there?" Reno pointed at the line cut three inches deep into the wall and Cloud determinedly looked away. "Oh shit, wait, I remember," Reno started and then stopped when he realized how uncomfortable it made Cloud.

"Fort Condor?" Cloud asked instead of a greeting, going to get some of the leftover pizza off the counter. Reno helped himself too.

"A complete shit-show. Fifty-two people dead in approximately twenty minutes. You ever seen it happen that fast?"

"Faster," Cloud said flatly.

"Right, stupid question."

They finished off the pizza as Reno recounted the events of the destruction of Fort Condor and what he'd learned since. No one was able to find an origin for the Triplets, not even Veld who apparently had bugs in the Science Department systems that Reno was now determined to find. The Turks were convinced this was a secret side project of Hojo's not on any known servers, while SOLDIER just wanted the three dead. Two Firsts and a Second were already hunting for the Triplets, and now the General, Lieutenant General, and four more Firsts from Midgar were joining them.

"Okay, now you've got the scoop so tell me what the hell you know about those three, because I know you know something. Maybe you even told me but lay it out for me again." Reno spun around on the barstool as Cloud pushed away from the counter and sat down on the couch, keeping his back to the slash on the wall. "Also," Reno continued on before Cloud could open his mouth, "You didn't blow up anymore reactors or do anything else I should probably be aware of while you were on leave, right?"

"No," Cloud said, but he wasn't looking at Reno either. The red head wasn't sure if he should be suspicious or if Cloud was just being his usual socially stunted self. Before he could decide Cloud went on. "The three are Remnants. I'm not sure where they came from or how they got here, but I've fought them before."

"Remnants of Sephiroth?" Reno asked bluntly.

"Yes."

"That explains the eerie similarities. But Sephiroth's not dead so where they'd come from and what do they want?" Reno got up and started to rustle through the refrigerator for more food. He couldn't see Cloud's expression but he was sure it was in turns pained and angry. Cloud always got like that when talking about the past.

"I don't know, but they want Jenova. They call her Mother—"

"So _that's_ what that meant. The reports mentioned it," Reno interrupted.

"Right. Mother."

"So wait, then Sephiroth is the brother?" When Reno poked his head above the fridge door he saw that Cloud was glaring at the floor like he wanted to put another hole in it.

"They said brother?" the blond asked stiffly.

"Yeah," Reno replied, brushing off Cloud's mood. He was used to this by now.

Cloud shook his head and walked back to the bedroom. Reno was about to follow with the sandwich he'd stolen, when he came back out with a sword. It wasn't a typical buster sword either, Reno realized. There were multiple swords involved and the whole affair was significantly fancier and more complicated than any sword Reno had ever seen.

"What is that?" he asked, awed.

"My sword. What did they say about a brother?"

Reno forced himself to stop eyeing the assortment of swords that made that one sword and concentrate. "Only that they had one. It's Sephiroth right? Or…" Reno squinted suspiciously. "Or you?"

"Not me anymore," Cloud said flatly.

"Right," Reno said, rocking back on his heels and letting that go for now. "Do _they_ know that though?" Cloud remained silent, which meant he didn't know of course. "With your luck the General and Zack are gonna find out that by brother they mean you and then you're screwed. Again."

"They already think I know something."

"Because they're not stupid I guess," Reno said, unsurprised. Cloud had really screwed this whole thing up with his secrets. "Okay, and these Remnants want Jenova why? Too much to hope it's to kill her too."

"They want her to ride this planet around the universe looking for other planets to destroy."

Cloud said this so matter-of-factly that Reno actually wanted to laugh before he realized how serious Cloud was being.

"You're joking."

"No."

"I thought she wanted to destroy the world? That's what evil Sephiroth wanted, right?"

"Sephiroth was dead. She used what was left of him as a puppet," Cloud said sharply, turning away to pack a bag with materia and ration bars. "She wanted to destroy our world since the Cetra destroyed her a millennia ago, and then ride it around the universe as eternal punishment."

"Well, at least we know exactly what she wants. Kinda creepy how you know that." Reno crammed the rest of the sandwich in his mouth.

"I—" Cloud paused for a millisecond. "Sephiroth talked." But Cloud wasn't remembering Sephiroth telling him, eyes rimmed in black from lack of sleep, speaking in a zealot's voice. He'd heard it somewhere else too. He could remember that sweet, aching voice in his head perfectly, urging him to help her, to make her happy in anyway possible. It was the same voice Sephiroth had been hearing.

"Okay, so we've established that there are three mini-Sephiroth's trying to find Jenova and do her bidding. And now Sephiroth himself is going after them."

"Yes."

"Right," Reno said, waiting for Cloud to interject how terrible that was, and find some way to drag Sephiroth back here into safety. Cloud didn't though. "Isn't that bad?"

"Yes."

Reno waited. Cloud continued to pack supplies and moved to Zack's room to pack whatever was in there. Reno followed him, but he didn't know if he could actually wait the blond out. But Cloud continued to stuff the bag with a few layers stolen from Zack's closet, pounding everything down into the pack like he could pound away his own weaknesses if he tried hard enough.

"So we're bringing Sephiroth and Zack in?" Reno finally asked as Cloud proved to be perfectly capable of ignoring him for the rest of the day.

"No!" Cloud said sharply, and when he glared up at Reno the Turk realized just how mako-bright those eyes were now. "I need more mako and the rest of First Tsurugi and then I'll take care of the Remnants. I've fought them before, I know how to beat them."

Cloud's hands shook as he zipped up the bag, and with his eyes so bright it made the circles under them look even worse. He always seemed so steady, but Cloud would be the first to admit that it was all a mess under that thin veneer of control. Reno could see the façade cracking at the mention of mako.

"Where are the other syringes?" the red head asked, warning bells in his head going off. Really they should have been going off long ago, but he'd been ignoring it despite years on the streets teaching him better.

"Gone," Cloud said shortly.

"And now you need more?"

Cloud shrugged.

"You sound like… like, damnit, a druggy, Cloud," Reno said. He'd been unconsciously avoiding the moniker, but now with the shakes and the eyes and Cloud's desperation it was the only word that fit. "You want to keep taking mako and you don't want help. And it's not good for you. Look at what it's doing to you."

"I'm not addicted to mako," Cloud ground out dangerously, standing stock still now. He wanted nothing more than to stop talking about it. Every time he thought about taking more of it he wanted to be sick.

"It's a drug," Reno argued, "Like a super steroid. And trust me, some of those beef-bags at Bro's gym can't do anything without shooting it up."

"I'm not—"

"I know how it is, Cloud, even done it a few times myself. You feel powerful, on top of the world, and when the lows hit and that tremble starts up in your pinky finger you gotta stop. Can't believe I didn't say this before," Reno went on. He'd known a lot of junkies growing up, and no speech had ever made them stop, but Reno couldn't catch the words as they tumbled out of him. He wasn't letting Cloud go down this road. He wasn't.

Cloud's hands were clenched on his bag, no longer shaking by pure force of will. "I don't _want_ to take it," he finally said, staring at the floor so hard he wouldn't even blink. "If you think it's bad enough to watch fifty-two people be slaughtered once, it's worse to relive a plate falling and crushing thousands of people, or burning towns, or laying on the lab table, or friends—" Cloud stopped short from saying anything more. He _made_ himself relive those things by taking those injections. Maybe he was punishing himself, but it didn't feel like it. He took mako because the real punishment would be watching the whole thing repeat itself.

"That's what… but I thought…" Reno had only had the small Turk injections, and he'd felt like he was thrumming with energy afterwards, but Cloud… Suddenly his impassioned speech about habits and power-highs sounded stupidly ignorant.

Cloud didn't say anymore, but he didn't have to.

When Cloud glanced up again, Reno had his hands up in surrender. "Okay, fine, you don't want to take it but you do. I get it. I've seen some shit that I wouldn't take a nightmare drug to relive even if—" Reno stopped, realizing of course that Cloud was doing it to save his friends, the self-sacrificing bastard, and Reno couldn't undermine that. "What I mean under all that is, I don't want to watch you go down because you're too bullheaded to change. Trust me, a lot of guys die with their pride holding them back."

Hearing Reno say that made Cloud shift his weight and look at him. Reno had been a surprisingly good friend and shockingly loyal, and it was hard to hold his genuinely concerned gaze. Cloud's eyes dropped to Reno's shirt. "Reno… I am—"

Cloud stopped. Pinned beneath one of the Turk's buttons was a tiny little chip. "What is that?"

"What?" Reno asked.

Cloud reached out and touched the offending hardware.

"Is that a—Fuck. Fuck shit damnit," Reno started to curse, yanking the chip off his shirt and immediately electrifying it with his nightstick until they could both smell burning metal. "Goddamnit that was a bug. Who the hell would bug me? Fuck, I need to get back to the Turks and find out who did this. Our whole conversation…"

Behind Cloud's eyes the shutters went down again and the moment was over. Whatever softness had slipped out was pulled back behind the wall. "Contain it," Cloud ordered, grabbing his stuff. He shouldered First Tsurugi and headed down the hall to the door.

"If that was Tseng—"

Cloud stopped before he reached the door. "You know what, it doesn't really matter," he said. "If Tseng finds out then, whatever. Don't let him get in my way."

"You know I'd probably push him in your way," Reno admitted. "More importantly, what if that was your First buddies?"

"I…" Cloud had been so firm before about not telling them, but doubts were creeping in. He almost told Reno that, but… no. If that was Sephiroth and Zack bugging Reno then it was over and he didn't have to worry about it. If it wasn't them, fine, he wasn't talking.

"It doesn't matter." Cloud shook his head and left.

* * *

One train trip and a long walk from the station to Sector 7, and Cloud found himself back outside Aeris' church. He didn't know if she would be there or whether he even wanted to see her, but he had a feeling about this place anyway. It had always been special, and maybe that's how Cloud knew one of the pieces would be here.

The doors creaked open slowly as Cloud pushed them open and walked in. His eyesight was much sharper now, so the colors of the flowers were brighter than before against the brown of the pews and the grey of the stone. What drew his eye though wasn't the mix of gold and white petals or the watering can glistening in the corner. It was the glinting silver of another piece of his sword.

It was the hollow blade, the one that combined with the main one to give First Tsurugi the classic shape of a buster sword. It was jammed into the stone of the alter where Galatine had come to a final rest before. For a moment Cloud thought Aeris would come in to offer some commentary on the symbolism, but the church remained empty and quiet, barely a whisper through the flowers as Cloud walked closer and claimed his blade.

This one was lighter than the others and served sometimes as his main sword if the main part of First Tsurugi was elsewhere. It felt easy and natural in his hands as he swung it in a few arcs, and Cloud felt himself smile for a moment before he locked it into place with the others. It was almost complete, only the side blades missing. Cloud ran his fingers along the interlocking swords and felt a little surer that he was doing the right thing.

Then his PHS started to ring.

"Cloud," Vincent said, his usual low timber rumbling along the line. "I reached Fort Condor before the SOLDIER investigators the day before. It's not good."

Cloud considered heading back out of the church and towards the exit of Midgar, but with another glance at the flowers and then the door, he sat down in a pew instead.

"And?"

"They have materia and summons, and from the scale of the destruction and wound patterns, they're fighting it at First Class level or higher."

"I know that Vincent," Cloud replied.

"They've left the area, and I've lost track of them. I don't advise going one-on-three."

Cloud leaned forward to put his hands on his knees and stared down at his boots.

"I have to."

"Leave it to the SOLDIERs."

"They'll be dead."

"Sephiroth is coming."

"…That's even worse."

Vincent didn't respond though, and Cloud couldn't think of anything to say. He knew Vincent was right, just as he knew that Reno was probably right too, but what they also said felt so wrong.

"There was AVALANCHE before," Vincent said.

"I fought the Remnants alone." Cloud had, but only briefly. His fight with Kadaj and later Kadaj-turned-Sephiroth had been alone, but Loz and Yazoo hadn't been there. With all three of them could he handle it? If the three had been attacking him together up on the remains of Shinra Headquarters AVALANCHE probably would have jumped out of the airship to help.

But he didn't have AVALANCHE here. He had Vincent and Reno, neither of whom would be enough backup to take on the three. It was up to him again unless he risked Sephiroth and Zack. It was the same crossroads he always seem to end up at.

"I have to go." Cloud hung up.

He was just leaving the church and plotting his next steps when his PHS rang yet again. Cloud flipped it open tiredly and signed whne he saw Reno's name. It rang almost to voicemail before he finally answered.

"Yo Cloud, not great news but not the worst. Found out who bugged me." Cloud didn't make a noise one way or the other, so after a beat Reno went on. "It was Rude. Can't trust Turks man, or at least, sort of." There was some whispering happening in the background that was muffled, likely by Reno's hand. "Anyway, he heard everything, and wants an explanation. I, uh, had to kind of tell him."

"…"

"So right, yeah, uh, look, Rude's not a leap-o-faith sort of fellow if you get me, but he does have something you want. Make a trade, basically?"

"What does he want?" Cloud asked, wondering if Rude had the answer to this all along. Did he know where Jenova was? Surely it wasn't that simple.

"Answers. He's got First Class mako—four tubes of it—if you want it." Reno sounded less than thrilled by the trade Cloud was being offered, but it was more than enough for Cloud to jump on. Answers were easy, getting First Class mako wasn't. He wasn't going to ask how Rude had some.

"What does he know about Jenova?"

"Less than I do." Reno's voice moved away from the phone to confirm with Rude. "Yeah, that name doesn't ring a bell. You did say those experiments were awhile ago though."

"I'll be there in thirty."

Cloud hung up and boarded the next train for Shinra HQ. When he reached Reno's rooms twenty-five minutes later, Rude was standing by the window with his hands held behind his back like private security, and Reno was flinging rubber bands across the room at a poster of Rufus Shinra.

"Yo, Cloud," Reno greeted. Cloud dropped his bag but didn't remove First Tsurugi.

Rude didn't say anything and neither did Cloud, so after an awkward second Reno started off. "Well, I told Rude about Jenova making Sephiroth go crazy and destroy shit and want to ride the planet into another planet. And also how you and a later version of AVALANCHE basically chased him down and killed him and Jenova. And, uh, how you went back in time and stuff. You know, the big things."

Cloud looked at Rude as Reno finished and started fishing for more rubber bands. Rude seemed to measure him in a long look before he spoke.

"Tell me again."

Cloud had no desire to rehash the whole story in detail, so he kept it brief. Throughout the retelling Reno fiddled with his PHS as he laid on the bed in his rumpled suit and Rude watched Cloud talk behind his shades. The story sounded as dry as possible for such an epic adventure in Cloud's voice, but he didn't care if Rude was entertained, only that he'd be useful.

"Then I woke up here, not long after stopping the second Reunion."

Rude seemed to think for some time on what Cloud said. "Only Reno knows?" he finally asked, not giving away whether he believed a word of it or not.

Cloud shrugged. He wasn't going to mention Vincent to a Turk, even if Reno trusted Rude. If Rude wasn't above bugging Reno for information, than he wasn't above telling Veld about Vincent and complicating everything.

"You're going to kill the Remnants and Jenova?" Rude confirmed slowly.

"That's about the size of it," Reno agreed, leaning back on the bed with his arms behind his head. "I've been helping him sneak around, get information, hide from the General and Zack, you know."

"Hide?"

"If Sephiroth gets involved they'll be questions—the same ones he asked before he went mad," Cloud said, almost asking for a challenge to that assertion. "Zack would tell Sephiroth whatever he learned."

Rude didn't respond to that, but he was that kind of Turk. He assessed and analyzed but didn't make comments or try to change minds. Those were things Tseng was good at. Reno was brash and loud, a good balance to Rude's composure. Still, that cool gaze behind his ever-present sunglasses silently judging his decisions made Cloud want to turn around and leave.

"Right, that's it," Cloud finished lamely.

"Proof?"

"Have you ever seen Cloud pick up a sword?" Reno asked lazily from the bed.

Cloud considered Rude. "I know why the President is obsessed with the Ancients."

Reno sat up. "He is?"

Rude didn't blink or shift.

"He wants to find the Promised Land and an endless supply of mako."

"That's a fairytale," Reno snorted, lying back down.

"He let Hojo kidnap a Cetra and her daughter, and when she escaped they shot her to death. The daughter's been hunted ever since."

"Whoa," Reno said, sitting back up.

"Triple classified status," Rude said. "And a project on hold."

"It won't be on hold in five years if I fail," Cloud warned.

Rude didn't respond for several long seconds. Finally the man glanced at Reno before turning back to him.

"You still need mako?"

"Yes," Cloud said roughly. He didn't want to repeat himself about the experimentations or what they had involved. He'd skated that in his explanation, and Reno could fill Rude in if he liked. The less Cloud thought about those years the better.

Rude pulled out a small case from an inside pocket of his suit and tossed it to Cloud. It looked like a cigar case, but when he cracked it open four vials of mako were inside, all swirling with green color. Cloud snapped it shut quickly so he wouldn't be sick.

No one said thanks. Reno rolled his eyes on the bed, thinking that he had to do everything around here.

"Alright, now that Rude's in the know maybe he can find out where this Jenova thing is. The latest from the General's mission is that the Triplets have left Fort Condor and they're tracking them now."

Cloud wanted to say that they wouldn't find them, but he couldn't give Vincent away. He remained silent instead and let Reno go on.

"If we're lucky the General will take them out before they talk and that'll be one problem solved. For now though, what are you going to do with those?" Reno nodded at the slim case in Cloud's hands. "That's potent stuff, the kind they shower with. It's not inject-able."

"I can get you access to a shower," Rude offered after a moment.

"That is such a bad idea," Reno said immediately, but Cloud ignored him.

"Where?"

"Private Turk one. Mostly unused."

Cloud narrowed his eyes. That was convenient.

"Rude's angle is not wanting the whole world to be destroyed," Reno explained.

"Except we're not keeping the Shinra Company," Cloud said, daring Rude to say otherwise. "It's entirely Shinra's fault we're even here."

"Shinra is an employer," Rude acknowledged.

"One that demands absolute loyalty," Cloud argued.

Reno stood up now, this time apparently done with the posturing Cloud and Rude were subtly doing. "Look Cloud, as a Turk you do some real shit for Shinra, and Rude's been here a long time. Bet he knows a lot more about what the Science Department gets up to than most anyone else." Rude adjusted his sunglasses, almost like he was embarrassed. Reno continued on heedlessly. "And thing is, once you're employed by Shinra there ain't any leaving. Someone like a Turk with those skills? Veld'll put a bullet in your head first."

"Forceful retirement," Rude coughed.

SOLDIER was the same; no SOLDIER could just leave. They were property of Shinra in the fine print, a science experiment unwelcome on the masses except to stop riots and inspire worship. Shinra would pay any wage raise, fulfill any leave request or mission desire, so long as the SOLDIER stayed. And if they left anyway they hunted them down—the way Angeal and Genesis had been. So Cloud got where Rude was coming from now. He could work with people motivated by self-interest. It wasn't AVALANCHE, but Reno had proven to be worth it.

"Okay, where's the shower?"

* * *

Reno had accused Cloud of being a drug addict without realizing what mako did to him. Shakes, stealing, threats if he told anyone, demands for more and higher quality—Cloud did all those things, and that's what anyone addicted to a drug did. Of course, Reno hadn't realized until Cloud told him that mako didn't give him a high; it didn't make him feel so good and so powerful that he never wanted to come down.

What it did was so much worse.

Cloud vomited before the shower even turned on, standing naked and trembling as he waited like he expected a mudslide not a shower. Rude had loaded one of the vials of mako into the mechanism that would pour it on to Cloud. The mako would be mixed with a chemical combination to help it be absorbed by the skin, so Cloud would have to stand under the spray for four minutes. Reno didn't realize how torturous that was going to be until the screams.

Even Rude looked surprised by Cloud's reaction as the blond huddled in on himself, screams bouncing off the tile until it was deafening. They eventually stopped and turned into choked noises that were almost worse. Rude had to grab Reno by the back of his suit jacket to stop him from opening the door.

Into the second minute Cloud kept shuddering, and Reno wasn't sure if Cloud was crying or going into shock, his face tucked into his knees. He slowly fell down to the floor and lay there sprawled, with his head ticking occasionally in an unnatural way. By the third minute Cloud's eyes were open but he was staring emptily forward with no reaction to the spray still pounding down on him, making his skin turn a strange green hue, and Reno had to look away.

"This isn't normal," Rude said.

"Cloud is so far from normal that he makes the General look downright average sometimes. I can't look at this. He looks like…" Reno didn't know the word, but after a minute Rude said it.

"A doll."

Cloud had called himself a puppet before, and now Reno could see it. It was bad enough to watch, so how horrific was it to be reliving that?

At four minutes the shower sputtered out. They had to wait one minute for enough mako steam inside the room to drop from dangerous levels, otherwise Reno and Rude risked exposure too.

When Rude's watch finally ticked over, Reno yanked the door open and crouched by Cloud, who was still sitting on the floor like an abandoned toy. "Cloud, hey, Cloud?"

Cloud's head tilted up slowly, his eyes having trouble focusing. "Reno?"

"Yeah man, it's me. C'mon Cloud, let's get out of here."

Cloud cooperated well enough, standing up and seemingly unaware of how cool the locker room was or his nudity. Rude draped a towel around him that Cloud didn't acknowledge at all. Reno sat him down and handed him his clothes. Cloud had to be cajoled into putting something on, but he refused anything more than a t-shirt and boxers, not even pants because they itched.

"We should have asked him what to expect," Reno said, feeling very much like fretting, a state of mind he never wanted to be in again. When someone drank too much he rolled them on their side and counted their breaths per minute as they slept. When someone drugged themselves into a stupor he propped them up on the couch and crossed his fingers because no ambulances came to Wall Market. But when Cloud did so much mako so hard that he basically went comatose? Reno actually considered calling the emergency number before he remembered that _Shinra_ handled all emergency services.

"He said to leave him alone to handle it," Rude answered, though he adjusted his cufflinks, which gave away how uncomfortable the situation made him. The two Turks stepped away as Cloud stared blankly into space. He didn't react to snapping fingers, clapping by his ears, or even a hard poke. Nothing.

"This can't be okay. This is stronger than the other stuff. What if it's mako poisoning?"

Rude shook his head. Both of them knew that mako poisoning wasn't considered reversible. Reno leaned forward with his hands on his knees and groaned.

"Cloud, c'mon yo, the General's gonna kill me slowly if you die in a damn locker room cuz I gave you too much mako. Cloud."

Cloud's head turned a fraction towards Reno, like he was hearing his voice faintly down a long corridor. Any reaction was better than none though, and Reno actually barked a laugh of relief.

"Not poisoned then. Just… just drugged out of his mind. Any idea how long this will last?"

Rude shook his head.

"Any idea when the General gets back?"

Rude shook it again.

"Well we got until he gets back," Reno said, satisfied for the moment. "See if he doesn't wake up a bit more then we'll move him to my place."

Relieved, Rude took up a position at the door and Reno puttered around the small locker room so he didn't have to look at Cloud, opening lockers and picking locks to poke at people's stuff. Cloud continued to sit like a zombie through all this.

Reno found a lot of sweaty gym gear, some porn magazines, someone who was definitely into buff guys with glasses, and a pile of melted chocolate coins. The next one he opened had something even more random in it. "Hey Rude, come look at this. A megaphone!" Rude glanced over to see Reno speaking into the phone aimed at a locker, creating an echo that reverberated around the bank of lockers. Rude glanced at Cloud who hadn't twitched even though his hearing must be incredibly sensitive now, then adjusted his glasses.

"Maybe not a good idea," he said.

Reno flipped Rude the finger and kept rummaging, holding on to the megaphone. Rude watched exasperated, but he didn't move away from the door.

Somewhere between watching Reno and listening to the bangs of slammed locker doors Cloud vanished.

The only doors in the locker room were the one Rude was blocking and the one to the mako shower. It took Reno and Rude precious minutes to find out that Cloud was in neither the shower nor any of the lockers, and by the time Reno identified the off-kilter vent cover that had been behind Cloud's bench, the blond was long gone.

"How the hell did he know that was there?" Reno asked, peering up into the cavernous black of the air vent. "He used vents in the exam, but how did he know Shinra HQ had the same ones?"

"He broke into the HQ before," Rude reminded. Cloud had mentioned briefly storming the HQ to save a teammate and finding the President dead.

Reno pulled his head out of the hole and the Turks shared a look. Rude looked down at himself, his broad shoulders and muscled arms, and looked back at Reno. Reno glanced down at himself, only to remember that he was a skinny, underfed idiot who was about to climb into the air vents after Cloud.

"Shit, this job sucks. I'm gonna murder Cloud myself when this is over. Thought I was done with air vents," he muttered as he clambered up into the space.

* * *

Cloud had actually only gone as far as the next room over before climbing out of the vents. He needed to get to the highest floor where President Shinra was. If Sephiroth hadn't killed the President yet then he would, and Cloud could confront him there. If not, Rufus would be showing up too with his trained cat again.

Cloud made it to the elevators only to realize that he was missing the keycards. He shrugged his shoulders and decided to run up the stairwell, glad that he was feeling so well rested now. He didn't know where this energy in his muscles was coming from, but it made running up thirty more stories easy.

At the top though, Cloud realized that the door access didn't open to the balcony and helipad that circled around the President's office. Instead he was on top of it, on a roof covered in air conditioning equipment, PHS towers, and an assortment of cigarette butts.

"Bit chilly for a t-shirt and shorts," Reeve said, gaze flicking over Cloud. "And no shoes."

Cloud could almost feel his brain switch gears as the hallucination shifted, but the transition was so smooth he forgot immediately why he'd climbed all this way in the first place.

"Reeve," he grunted.

The executive put out his cigarette and donned his gloves. He didn't recognize the SOLDIER in the blue uniform, but his eyes were feverishly bright, which was unnerving. "I can't say we've met before."

The blond SOLDIER rolled his shoulders and ignored him, moving to the edge of the roof. He glanced down at the lights and activity below indifferently. "Shouldn't have let Neo-Shinra happen," he commented.

"Pardon?"

"Reno and the other Turks…" the SOLDIER trailed off, sounding confused.

Reeve didn't know what to make of this baffling conversation, but he latched on to the one understandable thing. "You know Reno?"

The SOLDIER shrugged again. He wasn't very good at conversing.

"I know him a little myself. He's loyal," Reeve offered, testing whether the blond liked Reno or not. He was clearly in the middle of a fit, and Reeve knew morally he shouldn't be taking advantage of this, but he and Reno hadn't spoken in a long time, and he still had a lot of questions for the redhead. Another's perspective might be helpful.

The SOLDIER snorted. "That's his job. Turks got a finger in every dirty pie of Shinra's."

"Reno's different."

The blond shrugged, walking away from the edge and over to the other side of the roof, uncaring of his bare feet and the broken bottles and cigarette butts that littered the small area.

"You must know some of the dirt of Shinra too," Reeve tried, since subtlety obviously wasn't working. The blond was too far gone in a haze to probably register much of what was happening let alone remember any of this.

He snorted derisively. "I _am_ the dirt of Shinra."

Reeve waited for him to go on, but he sat there and brooded over that instead.

"I'd think a high-class SOLDIER would be the pride of Shinra."

"SOLDIER's just a science experiment," the blond muttered.

"A successful one," Reeve countered.

"That's because all the failures are released into the desert."

Reeve paused. He knew the Science Department dabbled in a lot of things, including pharmaceuticals, military technology, even genome projects. But what this blond SOLDIER was implying…

"Are you saying some SOLDIERs fail?"

Cloud turned and glared at Reeve. "You saw them. Hell, we fought them. Through Cait Sith. The ones that didn't crystallize and die in the mako vats got loose. And Hojo lets them go when he runs out of space."

Reeve choked and fumbled the cigarette box he'd been casually holding. This SOLDIER knew about Cait Sith _and_ was saying Hojo made monsters?

"Did Reno tell you about Cait Sith?" Reeve asked, because he knew Shinra went to unimaginable lows, but actually breeding monsters? What purpose did that serve? Certainly it didn't make them money, which was all Reeve ever thought the company did anything for. Except, of course, Hojo, who desired what? To be a god?

Cloud rolled his head over his shoulders like they ached and didn't answer.

Reeve, meanwhile, vowed to review the tapes of Cait Sith's excursion to the labs and possibly change his mission. If Shinra really was making monsters, than what other underbelly full of secrets were they hiding? And how had this Third found out about all this?

When Reeve looked up again, the SOLDIER was gone.


	40. Bending Under the Strain

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vincent finds out what the Triplets are up to, and in the process learns a lot more. Cloud, Sephiroth, and Zack are reunited too, but there's still a lot unsaid between them...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The latest chapter! It probably should be beta read but I'm ready to get GD done, so apologies for typos or weird grammar. I'm not sure about the last scene, but I kept picking at it all week so at this point I don't want to read it again, but I don't want to make you wait another two weeks while I stew over it. So have at it, and let me know what you think!

The reports were grim.

Banora had been leveled. The entire village was little more than rubble after the Remnants arrived, tearing through it like a natural disaster. Vincent got there in time to see the three men fleeing, not entirely unharmed, but certainly the winners of whatever battle had taken place.

Buildings had been pulverized with mechanically enhanced punches, fuel tanks and front door locks had been blown away with bullets, and the townsfolk had been killed by all of these things, but mostly by the sword. What was left was on fire, though even that was slowly dying as it began to rain, destroying precious evidence.

Vincent gathered what he could about the events in Banora, but most people had not been left alive, and the answers he wanted were complicated. Why had the Triplets come here? Why all this destruction? Where were they going now? He'd barely checked the closest homes when he started to hear engines and tires bouncing on dirt roads. The SOLDIER outpost in Mideel was arriving, likely having seen the smoke curling up into the sky from afar. The General and Firsts wouldn't be far behind.

Vincent escaped into the orchard and from there to the forest surrounding the town, hiding his tracks and leaving as much surveillance equipment as he dared. Turks would be descending here too, and they would find them. What little information he'd been able to gather from the village would have to do. The rest he'd have to pick up from Shinra's investigation team.

Hours past as the SOLDIERs secured the area and the clean-up crews came in, burying bodies in the local cemetery haphazardly and clearing up debris enough to clear a space for a temporary outpost. There was an obvious effort to make this look like an accident and anything but the massacre it was. If anyone learned about three extremely dangerous men running loose the public outcry wouldn't be devastating for Shinra, but SOLDIER's reputation would suffer. Vincent could only guess where these orders were coming from, but it was probably the Turks or Heidegger himself. He watched from the forest above and monitored the radio devices he'd left in the town, listening to the murmur of horror swelling from the soldiers, some battle-hardened by the Wutai War but still shocked by the random carnage.

Vincent considered the angles as he listened, hearing another report of the General's helicopter on route. The Remnants were manipulative and violent, and willing to plow their way through any obstacles. The secret lab of Hollander's had brought them to Banora, it became clear, but Vincent couldn't figure out how they'd found it unless Jenova really was here. Did they kill all the townsfolk on her order, like presumably Sephiroth had done to Nibelheim in Cloud's original timeline? Or had they killed them out of anger at _not_ finding Jenova? More importantly, the town square had clearly been a battlefield, so who or what had they been fighting there? One of Hollander's leftover creatures or—

Leaves crackled underfoot in the forest around him, and Vincent pulled his cape closer to his body as he listened. He was in the shadows of the trees, but the bright red didn't hide well among the green sprouts of spring. Someone was nearby.

Crouching low, Vincent stalked carefully through the forest, ears straining to follow the snapping twigs and bending branches as someone carelessly cut through. As he got closer, the footsteps he heard were stumbling, halting ones, and Vincent dared to draw closer.

Through the trees appeared a bright white wing, unmistakably the same mutation Cloud had described the former Firsts, Angeal and Genesis, forming as they began to degrade. Vincent cautiously rounded the figure, watching him stagger around tree rootss, visibly weakening with each step.

It wasn't Genesis or Angeal, both whom Vincent had also studied after his escape from the Shinra Mansion. It was another man altogether, but who shared enough characteristics of Angeal's profile picture that Vincent remained wary. It wasn't natural, what he was seeing.

"Who's there?" the man called, coughing a bit at the effort. He kept determinedly walking, even though each step seemed a strain. One arm was wrapped around his torso like he'd broken ribs, and his knee was swollen and straining the combat pants.

Deciding the man wasn't a threat in his state and potentially had useful information, Vincent stepped out into the open. The man stopped and leaned heavily on a tree, turning his head just barely around to see Vincent. "Who are you?" he asked, watching him with heavy lidded eyes. As Vincent drew closer he noticed the subtle differences from the photos of Angeal he had studied. His cheeks weren't as broad, and he lacked the eye shape despite the wide jaw, clear hair, and nose features that matched. He could have been Angeal's brother, except there was something wrong. "You are a copy," Vincent said, approaching slowly.

"Yes, a copy," the man said, body shaking with the effort to stand. His ribs had to be paining him seriously with how he gripped them, but he stood nonetheless.

"How did you last so long when Angeal has been dead more than a year?" Vincent asked, still standing a far outside the one-winged man's reach. One didn't become a First Class SOLDIER or a clone of one without gaining some of those abilities.

"I injected myself," the man admitted without shame. He seemed beyond it. Perhaps he knew that with Angeal dead the injection would cause him to degrade too, though not being formerly human meant that his death was slower.

"Why?"

"Revenge. But now… now I have to save them. Save the world." He tried to remain standing but the effort was too much and he slid to the ground. His wing dragged on the forest floor like he didn't have the strength to life it. Vincent glanced around their surroundings, making sure that they were alone.

"Save who?"

"Zack… Genesis…"

"You injected yourself with Angeal's cells?" Vincent confirmed. The man nodded. "Who were you before then?"

"Lazard… Lazard Deusericus."

Vincent didn't stir at that news, but it certainly made this conversation more interesting. Subtly he set his PHS to record it. Cloud had mentioned the SOLDIER director's disappearance as happening differently than his original timeline, but it looked like Lazard had met the same fate. Cloud hadn't known much else about him though.

"Why are you here?"

"I tried to save Genesis. Those men… the silver ones… they're powerful. Dangerous."

"You fought them?" That would explain the battle marks in the main square.

"Genesis and I. We were a team again, just like before." Lazard coughed, seeming to forget for a moment he wasn't Angeal. "But then Genesis took Hollander and disappeared, and I couldn't beat them. Not alone."

"Why were Genesis and Hollander here?" Vincent asked. Lazard coughed again, and it sounded like there was fluid in his lungs. Only the hardiness of a Firsts' cells was keeping him alive at this point.

"Jenova. They're looking for her like the three men. Hollander… told them she was here but…"

"Is she?"

Lazard shook his head.

Vincent drew closer, eventually standing over the fallen man. "Where is Jenova?"

Lazard shook his head again. "I don't know. Hojo's hidden her I guess. Hollander can't find her."

"What do you know about Cloud Strife?"

"Who?"

Satisfied, Vincent turned away.

"Wait!" the white-haired Lazard called. "Wait. The Lifestream. I want to go there."

The murmurs on the radio were growing louder, meaning more and more were calls with coming in. Vincent couldn't miss this. He kept walking.

"Wait."

Pausing, even though he knew it would be better to silence that sympathetic part of him, Vincent turned back around.

"It's… it's calling me. Tell Zack… tell him I'm sorry."

Vincent had seen a lot of men die, but this was the first time he'd seen one slowly vanish the way Lazard did. He seemed to melt into blue particles of light and then into nothingness. Even when nothing was left of the former director but an impression in the soft soil, Vincent found himself considering if his soul also consisted of little blue lights, or if that was the Planet's manifestation.

He would have to ask Cloud what it had looked like when the Planet fought off Meteor. Little blue lights? An ocean of them?

Tucking the thoughts away, Vincent was extra careful to conceal himself as he crawled to the overlook of the village he'd been occupying earlier. Sephiroth had arrived with his support, and they were about to check the village themselves.

Vincent felt that familiar stir in his chest as he caught sight of that long silver hair. He didn't know…. Wasn't sure… but the possibility always jumped to mind when he considered Sephiroth. The timing was right after all. And Lucrecia had never said…

The General and other Firsts conferred for some time before they tackled the village, and Vincent kept tabs on what they studied. The darker haired man who Vincent identified as Zack Fair, the Lieutenant General and Cloud's closest friend, took the lead in the investigation. He seemed to know Banora well, and he moved from home to home efficiently.

Then in one building with barely three walls left to it, they vanished.

When they didn't emerge after five minutes, Vincent turned up the radio and tweaked the transmission. It crackled terribly and cut out occasionally, but he was just barely able to hear the secure feed connected to Sephiroth.

"…uninhabited."

"That wall… touched?" That was Sephiroth's voice, his baritone unmistakably.

"Ma- 'ould be? Think they—"

More fuzz cut into the feed until Vincent couldn't hear anymore, he kept trying the dial but then the other SOLDIERs voices were jumping on the comms.

"Gunshots!"

"Did you hear an explosion?"

"The ground is cracking!" Focusing back on the town, Vincent saw several SOLDIERs jumped away from a neighboring house of the one the General had disappeared in, reporting more sounds of fighting.

Then out of the ground burst a man in red, one black wing thrown out proudly behind him. He glared down at Zack who followed him out of the ground, wielding his buster sword. Whatever they yelled at each other was lost in the second explosion that caused the ground to give way, and then they were fighting in the air, matching blow for blow.

The fight was amazing, but Vincent was careful not to get caught up in their match in case he missed something vital below. The other SOLDIERs were watching, and some of the Firsts were trying to join in, but there was still activity outside the main battle. A third house across the main square burst from below, and Sephiroth appeared with his sword out, a man held tightly in his grip.

Vincent pulled out his binoculars to confirm, because as sharp as his eyesight was, he could not be mistaken about this. He focused quickly on the yellow t-shirt with the red logo of Banora, complete with that ring around the 'O', and the scruffy salt and pepper beard. There was no mistaking it: Sephiroth had Hollander in custody.

Two Firsts took the scientist away as the General joined the battle, and with the best SOLDIERs in the business fighting him it wasn't swift but the end was obvious. Genesis put up an argument and a good fight, but in the end the degradation and the lack of desire to live did him in. Sephiroth's blow was final and complete. The last missing First was dead.

Vincent lowered the binoculars as he considered the situation. He didn't know what Genesis had said to Sephiroth and Zack, but he could guess it was something personal, probably unrelated to Cloud and more likely involving their personal history. Hollander was another story though. His narrative was intertwined with Hojo's, and he knew and had met about the Remnants. What conclusions he had drawn might be devastating.

Vincent pulled out his PHS and dialed the only number he had in it.

It rang four times before Cloud picked up. "Vincent." It sounded slightly slurred.

"Genesis is dead."

"…So Zack—"

"Sephiroth."

There was silence on the other end. He could hear Cloud breathing raggedly. Vincent couldn't tell if he'd been training, drinking, or something else.

"Hollander is in custody," he finally said. He could hear Cloud walking for a few beats after that before his footsteps sped up suddenly.

"I have to go. They're on my tail." Cloud hung up before the ex-Turk could ask what was happening.

Cloud could handle himself better than most in a tight situation, so Vincent pushed his concern away. The blond would never ask for this, but Vincent knew Hollander was a loose tie that needed to be cut. He knew about Jenova, the S-cells, and probably a lot more about Hojo's doings than anyone knew. If he started talking, Sephiroth might start digging, and Cloud had been explicit about stopping that.

Vincent watched the transport take Hollander away towards Mideel and packed up his things.

* * *

Shinra's holding facilities ran the gamut of security levels, but Mideel's weren't the highest. Unfortunately, Sephiroth was perfectly aware of that and had put a First on duty along with Seconds. The actual facility was a small, two-story building, with the cells on the bottom floor. The General had taken over the building next door and one room had been hastily converted into an office. Sephiroth and Zack Fair had been holed up there most of the day.

Vincent's plan, therefore, didn't involve actually breaking and entering, but deceiving and entering. He donned a Turk suit stolen from the Turk quarters in the Mideel outpost station and slicked back his hair into a neat ponytail not unlike Tseng, even going so far as to use hair gel to style it as he'd seen men do in Midgar. It made Vincent look even younger, which was the idea. If anyone dared to suspect he was still around, they would not expect him to look under fifty.

Satisfied, Vincent's stolen oxfords clicked smartly on the tiled hallway as he took the stairs down to the holding cells. The door at the bottom opened into a long hallway with a door at the end guarded by a First.

"Halt!" the SOLDIER called when Vincent was still fifteen feet away. "Holding cells are in lock down. Don't approach."

"I'm secondary security. The acquired target necessitates it." Vincent affected a bored, slightly higher-pitched voice to further conceal his identity and casually tugged at his clothes. This First would remember those mannerisms more than his appearance if he kept repeating them; it was a classic trick along with not making eye contact. Eyewitness testimony was unreliable and easy manipulated, as every Turk knew.

"You know interrogations aren't happening until he's been moved to Midgar, Turk," the First reminded, his dislike obvious. "And don't think the General will forgive you for trying. The prisoner was under Turk custody the last time he escaped."

Vincent exaggerated a sneer. "I expect you to stop the brawn that tries to take him, and I will stop the real threats—the ones that get through you."

The SOLDIER squared his shoulders, taking up the entire width of the tight corridor. Getting around the man would be very hard, which was why Vincent wasn't trying.

"A Second will go with you while you check the perimeter. I expect you out in fifteen minutes."

"I expect I'll be out when we take him to the helicopter," Vincent smoothly corrected, tugging on his cufflinks again. The First's eyes darted to the movement.

"This is the only way in or out."

"That you know of," Vincent added, and he could see those mako-bright eyes glinting in the dark. Cloud's weren't that color yet. The First opened his mouth to argue and Vincent waved his words away in that same irritating manner Veld always did, particularly when he was cutting off someone he considered beneath him. "I will show the Second. I doubt the fat man could get through it anyway."

Firsts were not generally taught to de-escalate situations, so this one was doing an admirable job of controlled breathing so he didn't punch Vincent. Vincent continued to be nonchalant, adjusting a button on his suit as he waited for the man to step aside.

The First did eventually, but not without giving him another dark look. "Kunsel!" he called over his shoulder, never taking his eyes from Vincent. Smart man. "There's a Turk here to check security. Walk with him."

A tan, redheaded Second opened the door. He and the First had a brief conversation in whispers, which Vincent could clearly hear. The First warned Kunsel to keep an eye on him and about that second exit. Nodding, the Second bid Vincent to walk in. As they passed each other in the doorway, Vincent was careful to take stock of the armor and weapons Kunsel had on him. The SOLDIERs were doing the same.

The room beyond had eight separate cells in it: four on each side, with the entrances to those cells along small hallways breaking off the main one. The design was so none of the cells shared a wall. The lighting was dim and the air was stale, but Vincent could see clear to the back wall where an assortment of weaponry and restraints were hung.

"Show me that second exit," Kunsel said, letting Vincent walk ahead of him. They got no more than five steps beyond the door when Vincent palmed his hidden materia and cast as powerful a sleep spell as he could manage. Glancing back, Vincent was in time to see Kunsel's eyelids droop before the Second jerked up and shook himself awake. The sleep spell didn't take.

"Hey—" Vincent whipped around and grabbed Kunsel's head with both hands and slammed his temple straight into the stone wall of the corridor. The Second was dazed but not unconscious, so Vincent quickly kneed him in the stomach and repeated the head-blow, this time sending a gush of blood from the temple. Kunsel's eyes didn't open again.

Quickly Vincent propped up the unconscious man around the corner out of sight of the main door and pretended to be looking down an adjacent corridor for something. The door opened not a moment later.

"What was that?" the First asked, looking very suspicious. "Kunsel?"

Vincent grunted and called out. "The hatch is on the ceiling. Need to stand on something to get better leverage."

The First continued to look at Vincent in the hallway. "Where's Kunsel?"

"Supply corner," he said, thumbing down the hallway that the First couldn't see. "Might be a bucket or something." With a sharp twist of his wrist, Vincent was able to flick a gil down the corridor he stood in front of without being seen. It banged on the mop at the end and knocked it over.

"Shit," Vincent said in a deeper voice, throwing it so the sound seemed to come from the corner where Kunsel was supposed to be. Ventriloquism of this sort was a vital skill all Turks were taught.

Vincent was fully prepared to attempt the sleep spell again if the First didn't buy it, but after another long look at Vincent, the SOLDIER shut the door and resumed his post.

Alone now, Vincent stripped Kunsel of his headband that prevented sleep spells from taking effect and cast it again. Unless the man was hit directly, he wouldn't wake until the spell wore off. The First would no doubt be checking up again, but Vincent didn't need much time.

Hollander's cell was the last one on the left side. Inside there was nothing but a chair nailed to the floor and a small bucket. Vincent picked the lock in a minute.

"Well, you're not who I expected," Hollander said. He was sitting in the chair with the air of a man waiting on guests, not like someone about to be sent to jail—or more likely, quietly disposed of. He sighed, sounding put upon. "I suppose the Turks just want information. Well I'm not going to help. Shinra has snubbed every last one of my creations and let that credential-less, unimaginative man run a laboratory. What has he made since Sephiroth? Nothing."

Well aware of Hollander's feelings concerning Shinra and Hojo, Vincent cut to the chase.

"Do you know where Jenova is?"

"Heh, no. And if I did I wouldn't tell you."

"I don't work for Shinra."

"You don't work for me either." Hollander eyed Vincent though. "Who _do_ you work for?"

"Me."

The scientist snorted, waving one fat hand in the air. "That's what they all say, but I can tell something's been done to you. Can't be Jenova cells, can it, otherwise you'd feel the call—"

"You know about Reunion?" Vincent interrupted. He and Cloud had thought no one but Hojo knew about that.

"Yes, why else are those… copies, aspects, whatever they are after that creature? Ancient yes, but not _an_ Ancient," Hollander continued. "Hojo was talking out of his ass as usual, making up the numbers when the math didn't add up! Gast was on to something—that was a scientist with potential. Not Hojo. Never."

Hollander was clearly defiant even when he'd lost, and was being stubborn even though he gained nothing from not cooperating at this point.

"Want to be free?" Vincent offered.

Hollander eyed him. "You look like a Turk. I don't believe Turks."

"Hojo did this to me," Vincent said instead, offering a mutual goal as a way to win the scientist over. "Jenova is his prized possession. Destroy it and cripple him."

"Jenova's old news. At least she was for a long time. If Hojo had any brain in him at all he'd have taken that tentacled beast and reduced it down to a few cells on slides in cold storage. Incinerate the rest. I should've done that with Gillian, ungrateful woman."

Vincent raised a brow but ignored the slight at Hollander's own experiment. "You've been searching cold storage units for Jenova?"

Hollander rolled his eyes and slouched further into the seat. Vincent took the quiet moment to make sure Kunsel wasn't stirring and there weren't footsteps approaching. When silence continued to reign he tried another tactic.

"Genesis is dead."

"He always was a failure." Hollander sighed again.

"All of your experiments are gone now."

"Angeal was the real loss." He crossed his arms and looked away, and even though his posture said he didn't care, Vincent had been taught to read deeper into body language. Hollander was affected by both of their losses, even if he wouldn't admit it.

"Have you ever heard the name Cloud Strife?"

Hollander's eyebrow went up. "No…?"

"Did the three Remnants mention a brother?"

"Remnants?" Now Hollander uncrossed his arms and leaned forward. "Sephiroth's Remnants? How can that be? Pieces of his left over that gained form and consciousness?"

Vincent didn't explain. It didn't matter what a dead man knew.

"A brother?"

"How are they Remnants?"

"Brother," Vincent repeated, this time deliberately fingering his gun. Hollander was not a brave man, despite all his bold scientific experiments. He backed down at the sight of the triple-barreled gun.

"They did, something about a black sheep. Knew he was looking for Jenova too."

"And what of Sephiroth?"

"I don't know, I didn't' try to talk to them!" Hollander said, getting annoyed. "I was looking for Jenova too and thought if I sicced those three hounds on her I'd have her that much sooner."

"And?" Vincent asked.

"And they're crazy, that's what. Totally mad. Powerful as hell, but clearly mad. Mumbling about brothers and Sephiroth and jealous mothers."

"Anything else?" Vincent continued to finger his gun, feeling the heft of the three bullets he'd loaded earlier. Hollander was looking angry and red-faced but blind to what was coming.

"We got here and found them ripping the place apart when they didn't find Jenova, yelping about displeasing her, as thought the thing had any consciousness. They were angry too because they wanted to bring Jenova to Sephiroth—some kind of Reunion thing I imagine—and not let the General find him herself. I don't know it was—" Hollander slumped back, blood trickling from his forehead into his thinning hair.

It was easier to put a bullet in the brain of a victim not looking at you, and not actively engaging with you, Vincent had found. Hollander, so riled up in his annoyance at the Remnants, had nearly forgotten Vincent was there at all. Now he would never tell anyone he'd ever been there.

* * *

Cloud was broody when Sephiroth and Zack returned to Midgar.

This would have been an appropriate mood for Sephiroth or Zack given that they'd lost the lead on the Triplets, killed their friend Genesis, and somehow let Hollander be assassinated right under their noses, essentially coming home empty-handed. But Zack was as chipper as normal, if one didn't look too closely, and Sephiroth actually felt some relief at putting Genesis to rest. He hated to kill a friend, but the Genesis he'd fought in Banora was far from the man he'd trusted once.

Cloud's broodiness now was particularly off. Zack noticed first, when he dragged Cloud out of Reno's apartment. Apparently the blond hadn't gone back to his barracks because the Turk was keeping an eye on him—Zack couldn't get the answer out of Reno without making Cloud mad, so the First had settled for shooting the Turk a nasty look and hustling Cloud out.

"C'mon Cloud, it's not gonna be that bad," Zack cajoled. "You just look like you've gotten some real practice in and no one's better at assessing levels than Seph."

Cloud hadn't turned around and walked out of the gym yet, but that didn't mean he wouldn't. He had yet to look at them, looking away and down at the floor with his characteristic stoic look.

It was hard to see Cloud's face from the angle, but Sephiroth thought he looked tired and lackluster, his cheeks more hollow than before. It was like some of the life in him had been drained out, from his very appearance to his posture. That he hadn't fought Zack that strongly to come here meant something was eating Cloud inside. Sephiroth intended to find out what.

"Did something happen with Reno? With… a scientist? They didn't drag you off for a physical or something did they?" Zack said, coaxing Cloud across the room to the actual gym floor.

"It's nothing, Zack."

"It's not nothing," he argued back. "I can see your eyes from here and I know that's not nothing. Talk to me Cloud."

The blond's lips tightened and the skin at his eyes pulled taut. Sephiroth had a horrible suspicion. "After," Cloud finally said, and Zack took a breath and stepped back.

"Alright, after. I'll hold you to it," he promised. He stepped behind the bench where their bags and a first aid kit were sitting just in case. Zack was still looking at Cloud like he was about to explode or collapse, but Sephiroth was about to find out.

"Take up your sword," he instructed, walking away from the bench and into the middle of the training room gym.

They had booked the First Class SOLDIERs' training room again. If Cloud was affected by the choice he didn't mention it. After some hesitation, the blond strode out with the secondary training buster sword—he'd traded away the first one. Sephiroth noted that neither he nor Zack had seen the twin blades Cloud had traded them for. Sephiroth had no doubt they were hidden away somewhere nearby. Hopefully that would be explained "after".

"Ready," Sephiroth intoned, lifting Masamune to be parallel with the ground. Cloud lifted his buster sword into a ready position, and when their eyes met Sephiroth saw the same thing Zack had: SOLDIER. There was too much mako in Cloud's eyes. Even if he'd had one injection after returning from leave before Zack and Sephiroth returned, the effect was far too strong.

"Go!" Zack yelled. No sooner had the word left his lips that Sephiroth darted forward with a direct attack.

Cloud swung and parried, knocking Masamune up and to the left, which Sephiroth countered with a downward swing that could have cleaved arm from shoulder easily if Cloud hadn't neatly sidestepped and spun.

They moved precisely with the skill of natural swordsmen, weaving patterns in slashes of silver, flashes of black interspersed between whirls and spins as they ducked and dodged dangerous blows. Just as before, Cloud seemed to read Sephiroth's patterns, seeming to know the exact parry to a move just as Sephiroth began to execute. It was frustrating and exhilarating at once, especially as Cloud continued to hold up under the high-speed strain of the fight. The leapt about the room, Cloud driven back more often than not, but he was quick on his feet as he flipped and turned before the wall met his back.

As the fight went on though, Cloud couldn't really level with the General despite significant speed and stamina increases. Sephiroth was able to prove Cloud's limits when jumped up and rained a series of blows down on Cloud, who did little more than hold up his buster sword and take them. He couldn't jump up and hover like Sephiroth to avoid the attack, and he couldn't match his speed.

Just as Sephiroth was about to flip over Cloud's head for a strike aimed at his vulnerable back, Cloud shouted, "Thunder3!"

Bolts rained down, and Sephiroth cut off his attack to quickly throw a Shell spell on to deflect most of the electricity. Cloud had been unnaturally good at magic—almost as unnaturally good as he was with the blade—but that Thunder spell had been almost weak. Cloud panted as he straightened, using the time he'd bought to recover some of his mien. Separated now by about ten feet, Sephiroth calmly raised Masamune above his head and pointed it at Cloud in a fencer's stance. No sooner had he adopted the traditional pose that he lowered it when he saw Cloud flinch and remove one hand from his sword to touch his shoulder.

"Cloud?" Zack called, but the blond muscled past the moment, regained his grip, and launched himself at Sephiroth.

This time the blows knocked chips of metal off the training sword because Cloud was swinging it so hard. At one blow Sephiroth actually gripped Masamune with both hands to ensure he didn't get cut, deflecting the momentum of the strike down and to the ground before he shoved a shoulder into Cloud's stomach, winding him and knocking him back.

Sephiroth expected that Cloud would drop his defenses in the wake of that blow, and rather than capitalize on it he fell back a step, ready for another round. But Cloud never reacted as Sephiroth expected, which really was what Sephiroth should have always expected. Cloud took the blow and when he stepped back to keep his balanced he turned on the ball of his foot and pushed off, shooting like an arrow straight at Sephiroth.

Masamune was uncomfortably close to Sephiroth's face as Cloud brought the fight close and quick, but the blade was singing with each strike against the dull metal of the training sword. In flashes Sephiroth could see that the buster sword was breaking down, the edge literally being cut off because of the angle of the blows and the sharpness of Masamune's blade. Deciding to end this before shrapnel hit one of them, Sephiroth jumped back and hit the wall feet first, pushing himself over Cloud's head and preparing to use one of his first Limit Breaks. A lifetime of training taught him to react fast though when Cloud pushed off the wall too and then _changed direction in midair_ and pushed off the ceiling.

Defying the laws of gravity like that was a high level skill, the kind that was difficult to teach because it required mastery of the body and the sword. Cloud performed the anti-gravity move smoothly and when he launched from the ceiling his blade was shimmering with magic.

Sephiroth considered a hundred things in that millisecond before the hit, including the integrity of the walls, floor, positioning of Zack, likelihood of others in the building, and what materia he had. Decision made, Sephiroth switched his grip and cast his Wall materia in time to take the blow, but he was thrown back ten feet with Cloud pushing him every inch. The blond was breathing hard at the exertion and when their eyes met in that split-second Sephiroth saw very little of the Cloud he expected.

-This time though, he knew to expect the unexpected.

With his full weight behind him and not tempering his blows, Sephiroth swung horizontally and struck the buster sword directly so hard he flung Cloud back, flipping him into the air. In a second blow he hit the huge blade near the hilt and knocked it loose from the blond's hand. The training sword went one way, and with a hilt-strike to the stomach Cloud went the other. The blond hit the wall with a crack and slid to the ground, dazed from hits to the head and the stomach. Before Zack could run over to access the damage Sephiroth was on Cloud, one hand dropping Masamune and the other grabbing Cloud by the collar and lifting him clean off the floor.

"Do you know how dangerous supplemental mako is? Do you know what that can do to you?"

Sephiroth wanted to shake Cloud but he couldn't quite do it, not even when he realized how those brilliant blue eyes he liked so much had begun to turn mako green.

Cloud didn't answer, but he was definitely aware and defiant. One bruised hand came up and grabbed Sephiroth's wrist.

Consciously slowing his breathing, Sephiroth continued, "I cannot claim to know what made you this way Cloud, but know that the path you travel is a terrible one. That much mako that quickly will do more than give you nightmares."

There was a flicker in that blue-green gaze that gave away Cloud's fear. Sephiroth latched on to even that glimpse of weakness, knowing he'd hit the spot. He lowered Cloud enough to let his feet touch the floor, but not quite enough to let him slip away.

"There are other ways to be strong. They may call me a one-man army, but it is untrue. I would be dead in the war if not for my comrades, and I think you are the same." Sephiroth's breathing by now had gone from ragged angry breaths to calmer, quieter ones. Cloud's were still harsh, still coming down from the exertion of sparring. "All battles can be fought alone, but not all battles can be won alone. Stop. Taking. Mako."

Sephiroth finally released Cloud, but the blond didn't stumble back or run away. He never did what was expected, not even inches away from one of the few people who could kill him in a serious fight. Sephiroth was now very aware that if Cloud continued to self-destruct like this he could take a First down with him.

"You've been taking mako, Cloud?" Zack asked, finally interrupting the moment. He was looking at Cloud with a mixture of hurt and worry on his face. "What level and how?"

"I had to," Cloud said flatly, and as his heart rate slowed and the adrenaline of the fight disappeared, he regained some of his equilibrium. "I have to be strong enough."

"Strong enough for what?" Zack said, his exasperation loud and clear. "We can see that you've always been trying to be strong enough but why? For your revenge? Hojo isn't a fighter you know. Genesis is gone now thanks to us, so there isn't anyone left outside SOLDIER you need to be that strong for!"

Sephiroth put a hand on Zack's shoulder, sensing that Zack's frustration wasn't just from Cloud's stubbornness but also pain at the death of Genesis.

"It's not revenge, it's pre-emptive," Cloud said fiercely. "Before anyone else gets hurt."

"Then let us help, Cloud," Sephiroth said, trying to be the soothing voice in this fight. He'd never been that before though, and from Cloud's clenched jaw it wasn't working. The blond made an aborted shake of his head, which was a huge step from the automatic 'nos' they'd always gotten, but it wasn't a yes either.

"I don't sleep for five days after an injection," Sephiroth said suddenly. "The risks of my unguarded mind in sleep reliving nightmares and memories are too high. Sleep-walking was… dangerous."

Sephiroth was speaking softly but he didn't hide the disgust or simmering anger in his voice. His hand never left Zack's shoulder either, and Zack let the too-tight grip stay to keep the General grounded as he continued. "The higher the mako concentration the worse it is."

"I don't need to sleep to have nightmares," Cloud finally said, and he was looking at Sephiroth with an expression that was hard to read. There was resignation and kinship there, but more too. He eventually rubbed his hand over his head and sighed. "I've screwed this up," he finally said. "Let me think about it."

Sephiroth squeezed Zack's shoulder before the First could interject about how much time Cloud had already spent thinking about it and straightened.

"Fine," Sephiroth agreed, "but you are hereby banned from injections. First level or not, you are relegated to Third Class and grounded from missions. You are to remain inside the grounds of Shinra Headquarters under surveillance. A note will be on your file today." The General's word was as law, but Cloud didn't bow his head.

"Third Class or not, you're moving in with me," Zack added, shooting Sephiroth a look that said they would hammer out the details later. "Let's go Cloud. It's after now."


End file.
